Coding Horrors: You can gather all your technical debt into one easy framework!

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > The Cavern of COBOL > Coding Horrors: You can gather all your technical debt into one easy framework!

«‹›1503 »

Blotto Skorzany: Nov 7, 2008; He's a PSoC, loose and runnin'
came the whisper from each lip
And he's here to do some business with
the bad ADC on his chip
bad ADC on his chiiiiip

yaoi prophet posted:

Guess what this evaluates to in JS:
code:
(![]+[])[+[]]+(![]+[])[+!+[]]+([![]]+[][[]])[+!+[]+[+[]]]+(![]+[])[!+[]+!+[]]

a shitload of weed.

# ? May 12, 2012 08:33

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 27, 2024 22:16

Impotence: Nov 8, 2010; Lipstick Apathy

Otto Skorzeny posted:

a shitload of weed.

http://utf-8.jp/public/aaencode.html

# ? May 12, 2012 09:34

Wheany: Mar 17, 2006; Spinya^{ha^{ha^haha}ha}ha_{ha_{ha_haha}ha}ha!; Doctor Rope

yaoi prophet posted:

Guess what this evaluates to in JS:
code:
(![]+[])[+[]]+(![]+[])[+!+[]]+([![]]+[][[]])[+!+[]+[+[]]]+(![]+[])[!+[]+!+[]]

It evaluates to "fail"

I'm going to explain the first few parts:
(![]+[])[+[]] is "f"
[] is an empty array.
![] first casts the array into boolean (true), then negates it, resulting false
![]+[] casts the left side (false, from the previous row) to string ("false"), then .joins() the right side empty array into an empty string, then concatenates the two, resulting the string "false"

So at this point we have
("false")[+[]]
The parentheses are pointless at this point, but were used earlier for grouping.
+[] becomes the number 0, either through string conversion or directly, I don't know.
So now we have "false"[0], which takes the first character of the string, "f".

By doing the same kind of tricks to true, false, undefined (for example [][1]), Infinity (1/0) and NaN (+("false")) you can get the characters adefiIlnNrstuy

e: adding an object ("" + {}) to the above, you get "[object Object]", which increases the available characters to abcdefiIjlnNoOrstuy[]

Wheany fucked around with this message at 10:31 on May 12, 2012

# ? May 12, 2012 10:21

Suspicious Dish: Sep 24, 2011; 2020 is the year of linux on the desktop, bro; Fun Shoe

Wheany posted:

+[] becomes the number 0, either through string conversion or directly, I don't know.

String conversion. Number([].toString())

# ? May 12, 2012 17:20

Simulated: Sep 28, 2001; Lowtax giveth, and Lowtax taketh away.; College Slice

Hey man, VB was doing automatic silent type coercion before it was cool :colbert:

. Variant says get off my lawn you drat kids!

# ? May 12, 2012 18:41

Opinion Haver: Apr 9, 2007

Biowarfare posted:

http://utf-8.jp/public/aaencode.html

Gonna run all my JS through this from now on.

# ? May 12, 2012 19:35

seiken: Feb 7, 2005; hah ha ha

Haha, you can run the output through it over and over to produce arbitrarily large and slow-executing equivalent code.

# ? May 12, 2012 20:18

revmoo: May 25, 2006; #basta

Haha nice. I'm going to have some annoyed coworkers next week.

# ? May 13, 2012 15:12

pseudopresence: Mar 3, 2005; I want to get online...
I need a computer!

Who's ready for some MATLAB?

http://abandonmatlab.wordpress.com/2012/05/11/errors-and-crashes/

# ? May 13, 2012 15:28

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

Was leafing through the camel book yesterday and came across use constant

code:

use constant A => 1, B => 2;

print A;

Output:

code:

1B2

# ? May 13, 2012 15:46

Sang-: Nov 2, 2007

Fib posted:

Who's ready for some MATLAB?

http://abandonmatlab.wordpress.com/2012/05/11/errors-and-crashes/

Matlab could fill this entire thread with how awful it is.

# ? May 13, 2012 16:25

PrBacterio: Jul 19, 2000

Carthag posted:

Was leafing through the camel book yesterday and came across use constant
code:
use constant A => 1, B => 2;

print A;
Output:
code:
1B2

Ugh, what language is that?

# ? May 13, 2012 17:06

Sang-: Nov 2, 2007

PrBacterio posted:

Ugh, what language is that?

what else but perl.

# ? May 13, 2012 17:15

Civil Twilight: Apr 2, 2011

If I remember perl right, the => operator really just acts as a comma, but also treats strings as quoted, so that's creating an array of (1,'B',2).

Apparently the proper way to do that is as a hash of constants, like:
use constant { A => 1, B => 2};

I don't miss perl.

# ? May 13, 2012 17:26

Zombywuf: Mar 29, 2008

It's pretty simple really, the constant package is terrible.

I miss perl a lot.

# ? May 13, 2012 18:00

moynar: Apr 15, 2006; Hello!

Sang- posted:

Matlab could fill this entire thread with how awful it is.

gently caress MATLAB: If you have a function GetData() which returns an array. Say you want the first element. Think you can do GetData()(1)? Nope, gently caress you, that's why. Gotta save to another variable. And this is if you ignore the parenthesis for indexing and the one indexing.

Or the stupid loving warning messages you get whenever you add %#ok to your script to get the editor to stop whining about something stupid, like unused return arguments, which should be replaced by "~" but whenever you actually do that it returns an error because it cannot always be done and so you add the loving '%#ok' to avoid linting messages but then it suddently gives yet another linting error just saying that the supressed message is not generated anymore burn it all down

Or the optional arguments style, which is Function(arg1, arg2, arg3, 'Keyword', 'KeywordValue') which leads to functions which take in strings being unable to process some strings because they trigger keywords. Consider the legend function, which takes in an arbitrary amount of strings, but also has keywords like 'Location' which cannot be used in the legend at all, because it triggers the legend placement subroutine.

And the stupid toolbox logic they use - MATLAB can be licensed per toolbox, which quickly gets expensive. Say that you have the parallel computing toolbox: You can then solve trivially parallel loops using the parfor keyword. What happens when someone doesn't have the parallel toolbox? Does the loop execute serially like with say OpenMP? No gently caress you, it just terminates with a license error, requiring the programmer to write extra logic. And because the for loop is a keyword, you have to duplicate all the logic which isn't in functions since you can't just switch the type of loop.

For the last year I have spent most of my programming in MATLAB. This is also the year when my whisky collection started shrinking, for some reason.

# ? May 13, 2012 21:26

Carthag Tuek: Oct 15, 2005; Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
sl�gt skal f�lge sl�gters gang

Zombywuf posted:

It's pretty simple really, the constant package is terrible.

I miss perl a lot.

I forgot to mention that it hilariously implements the constant as a function that takes no parameters and returns the value.

# ? May 13, 2012 21:42

Zombywuf: Mar 29, 2008

Carthag posted:

I forgot to mention that it hilariously implements the constant as a function that takes no parameters and returns the value.

What is a constant but a zero arity function?

# ? May 13, 2012 21:46

qntm: Jun 17, 2009

Yeah, use constant is pretty strongly discouraged in Perl Best Practices.

# ? May 13, 2012 22:04

Zamujasa: Oct 27, 2010; Bread Liar

Does future possibility for horrors count? Because my boss apparently just unironically suggested that we hire a bunch of ITT students and dope them up on caffeine to make the project we're working on move faster.

...

And oh god, MATLAB. I know a few people who have touched it and they've never been the same since. :ohdear:

# ? May 14, 2012 17:48

trex eaterofcadrs: Jun 17, 2005; My lack of understanding is only exceeded by my lack of concern.

Zamujasa posted:

Does future possibility for horrors count? Because my boss apparently just unironically suggested that we hire a bunch of ITT students and dope them up on caffeine to make the project we're working on move faster.

# ? May 14, 2012 17:54

trex eaterofcadrs: Jun 17, 2005; My lack of understanding is only exceeded by my lack of concern.

It's really too bad it doesn't show the whole picture. I have it on my desk. Off to the left, there's sabertooth tigers and vultures waiting for the bears to either get out of the tar or simply perish.

# ? May 14, 2012 17:55

Zamujasa: Oct 27, 2010; Bread Liar

trex eaterofcadrs posted:

Ugh, I know. I've tried linking this (as well as things like evidence-based estimating/scheduling) but it does not help at all. They have no idea how programming works.

# ? May 14, 2012 18:07

tef: May 30, 2004; -> some l-system crap ->

Zamujasa posted:

Ugh, I know. I've tried linking this (as well as things like evidence-based estimating/scheduling) but it does not help at all. They have no idea how programming works.

Try linking it twice so he can read it twice as fast :eng99:

# ? May 14, 2012 18:09

No Safe Word: Feb 26, 2005

tef posted:

Try linking it twice so he can read it twice as fast

That's silly, he just needs to have 8 people to read 44 pages apiece

# ? May 14, 2012 18:17

Ensign Expendable: Nov 11, 2008; Lager beer is proof that god loves us; Pillbug

Zamujasa posted:

Does future possibility for horrors count? Because my boss apparently just unironically suggested that we hire a bunch of ITT students and dope them up on caffeine to make the project we're working on move faster.

...

And oh god, MATLAB. I know a few people who have touched it and they've never been the same since.

Hire one to work on a minor project. When the project crashes and burns, use that as an example to never hire them again.

Unless your boss will suggest you hire another one to help the first one. Then you're screwed.

# ? May 14, 2012 19:08

Lysidas: Jul 26, 2002; John Diefenbaker is a madman who thinks he's John Diefenbaker.; Pillbug

If your boss suggests hiring a second inexperienced code monkey to help the first, show him a clip from the end of Simpsons S05E11 - "Homer the Vigilante" (after the townspeople start to dig for treasure and fail to find anything):

"I guess we're not going to find anything."
"Uh, how are we going to get out of here?"
"We'll dig our way out!"
"No, no, dig up, stupid!"

# ? May 14, 2012 22:50

ToxicFrog: Apr 26, 2008

tef posted:

So did I

Some ie9 user got butthurt that my avatar crashes/slows down their browser

Does it make me a bad person that I want to find out who it was and then buy them your avatar?

Zamujasa posted:

Does future possibility for horrors count? Because my boss apparently just unironically suggested that we hire a bunch of ITT students and dope them up on caffeine to make the project we're working on move faster.

What does ITT mean here?

Also - even apart from TMMM and the non-fungibility of programmer time - caffeine? Was he joking, or does he think that wiring the students up on caffeine will help them work faster?

Or does he think the answer is to work super-long hours and stay awake using coffee so they can make more fatigue-related mistakes per day? :ohdear:

# ? May 14, 2012 23:13

pokeyman: Nov 26, 2006; That elephant ate my entire platoon.

ToxicFrog posted:

What does ITT mean here?

If watching the same six films over and over again on what used to be called TBS is any indication, ITT is a lovely "technical school" that takes money from people in exchange for what is, in the computing industry, a worthless piece of paper.

# ? May 14, 2012 23:22

Strong Sauce: Jul 2, 2003; You know I am not really your father.

ToxicFrog posted:

Does it make me a bad person that I want to find out who it was and then buy them your avatar?

What does ITT mean here?

Also - even apart from TMMM and the non-fungibility of programmer time - caffeine? Was he joking, or does he think that wiring the students up on caffeine will help them work faster?

Or does he think the answer is to work super-long hours and stay awake using coffee so they can make more fatigue-related mistakes per day?

If you're not American, ITT is essentially a degree mill with a focus on technology, although I remember them expanding into crime/law enforcement related fields.

# ? May 14, 2012 23:46

Zamujasa: Oct 27, 2010; Bread Liar

Basically ITT Technical Institute.

The controversies part is really accurate. Even years after I checked them out I still get junk mail from them (and rarely a phone call). From the few resumes I've seen, most of the people we're referred from there have little to no actual experience doing anything.

# ? May 15, 2012 00:00

pokeyman: Nov 26, 2006; That elephant ate my entire platoon.

Zamujasa posted:

Basically ITT Technical Institute.

The controversies part is really accurate. Even years after I checked them out I still get junk mail from them (and rarely a phone call). From the few resumes I've seen, most of the people we're referred from there have little to no actual experience doing anything.

I knew it was worthless but this is outstanding:

quote:

"[The teacher wrote], 'Excellent job on the pro cons list. You were able to generate the required number of points, counter points for each issue'". Then, we asked Bradley to read what he actually emailed his teacher: "Ingredients: 2 1/2 cups all purpose flour, one pinch salt, two eggs beaten..."

Yup, a noodle recipe.

"It's exactly what I handed in for a hundred (percent)," said Bradley.

(from an article linked to from wikipedia.)

# ? May 15, 2012 00:08

Bhaal: Jul 13, 2001; I ain't going down alone; Dr. Infant, MD

My dad got an EE associates there in the 70s :smith:

. I don't think it had that reputation back then, or at least he lucked out and got teachers who gave a poo poo because he got enough education from there to start his career of circuit designing, starting with DEC right out of school.

# ? May 15, 2012 01:00

God of Mischief: Oct 22, 2010

Given that I was suckered into going to ITT for 4 years, I can vouch that my piece of paper is not worth anything. I actually had motivation to learn stuff on my own, but my god the school itself was worthless. I literally got A in classes I never turned anything in for.

In my defense, I thought the idea of small classes with a focus on technology sounded great. In practice, it meant I saw the same six people for every class and the technology itself was outdated and severely locked down (and thus useless for actually, ya know, learning).

# ? May 15, 2012 02:20

DaTroof: Nov 16, 2000; CC LIMERICK CONTEST GRAND CHAMPION
There once was a poster named Troof
Who was getting quite long in the toof

Bhaal posted:

My dad got an EE associates there in the 70s . I don't think it had that reputation back then, or at least he lucked out and got teachers who gave a poo poo because he got enough education from there to start his career of circuit designing, starting with DEC right out of school.

I get the impression that ITT didn't turn into complete poo poo until the 90s. It's always been a meat-and-potatoes trade school, but it might not have always been worthless.

One of the senior developers at my company has a degree from ITT. We basically ignored it. His technical acumen and his demonstrable work experience got him hired. Without the degree, we would have hired him anyway.

# ? May 15, 2012 02:42

epswing: Nov 4, 2003; Soiled Meat

DaTroof posted:

Without the degree, we would have hired him anyway.

I don't doubt that, but would he have had an interview in the first place without the degree?

# ? May 15, 2012 02:44

DaTroof: Nov 16, 2000; CC LIMERICK CONTEST GRAND CHAMPION
There once was a poster named Troof
Who was getting quite long in the toof

epswing posted:

I don't doubt that, but would he have had an interview in the first place without the degree?

Yes, but you bring up a legitimate point. In my company, applications for the development team come straight to the development team. If they went through an HR department with an arbitrary set of guidelines to follow, a lack of degree might have kept us from seeing it.

# ? May 15, 2012 02:58

shrughes: Oct 11, 2008; (call/cc call/cc)

Spent two days chasing down this bug.

code:

[ RUN      ] SizeofTest.Sizes
unittest/sizeof_test.cc:11: Failure
Expected: (1000) > (sizeof(cache_t)), actual: 1000 vs 151288
[  FAILED  ] SizeofTest.Sizes (98 ms)

# ? May 15, 2012 22:35

Scaramouche: Mar 26, 2001; SPACE FACE! SPACE FACE!

Bhaal posted:

My dad got an EE associates there in the 70s . I don't think it had that reputation back then, or at least he lucked out and got teachers who gave a poo poo because he got enough education from there to start his career of circuit designing, starting with DEC right out of school.

ITT started mostly as a hands-on trades school and had pretty good engineering course. Then they went down the late night informercial rabbit hole and will probably never come out. Compare and Contrast with DeVry.

# ? May 16, 2012 03:02

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 27, 2024 22:16

Progressive JPEG: Feb 19, 2003

shrughes posted:

Spent two days chasing down this bug.

code:

[ RUN      ] SizeofTest.Sizes
unittest/sizeof_test.cc:11: Failure
Expected: (1000) > (sizeof(cache_t)), actual: 1000 vs 151288
[  FAILED  ] SizeofTest.Sizes (98 ms)

google-test buddy! :respek:

PS why does this need to be tested, does sizeof(cache_t) frequently change?

# ? May 17, 2012 08:50

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > The Cavern of COBOL > Coding Horrors: You can gather all your technical debt into one easy framework!

«‹›1503 »