MSPaint Adventures - Homestuck Edition, the Final Acts

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Color Printer: May 9, 2011; You get used to it. I don't
even see the code. All I see
is Ipecac, Scapular, Polyphemus...

Bobulus posted:

Well, it would tie in with the Earthbound themes...

New theory: the kids and the trolls go back in time to abort English's ancient fetus, being contained in a cue ball machine.

Also Doc Scratch is there in a spider mech.

# ? May 23, 2012 23:19

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# ? May 22, 2024 01:52

Hamiltonian Bicycle: Apr 26, 2008; !

Color Printer posted:

Also Vriska is there in a spider mech.

It's got to be the fat kid, remember.

# ? May 23, 2012 23:22

Ominous Jazz: Jun 15, 2011; Big D is chillin' over here
Wasteland style

Hamiltonian Bicycle posted:

It's got to be the fat kid, remember.

Oh boy Vriska is coming back after all :allears:

# ? May 24, 2012 02:00

FewtureMD: Dec 19, 2010; I am very powerful, of course.

Ominous Jazz posted:

Oh boy Feferi is coming back after all

Fixed that for you.

# ? May 24, 2012 02:36

Dolash: Oct 23, 2008; aNYWAY,
tHAT'S REALLY ALL THERE IS,
tO REPORT ON THE SUBJECT,
oF ME GETTING HURT,

The gauntlet has been thrown, who is fattest according to fanon/head-canon/anything but actual canon. I'll throw Jane's sweat-stained fedora in the ring. Girl needs more to be self-conscious about, right?

# ? May 24, 2012 03:38

Doug Rattman: Sep 10, 2011; Formerly known as Doug Rattman

I like to think of Jane as the fattest, as well.

# ? May 24, 2012 03:40

Android Blues: Nov 22, 2008

Sollux is a tubby goon who spends all his time at his computer desk. That's my bid.

# ? May 24, 2012 03:50

graybook: Oct 10, 2011; pinya~

Bilious Slick is on the rather chubby side, one could argue, so I'll stick to that.

# ? May 24, 2012 03:50

Bongo Bill: Jan 17, 2012

I'm gonna say HB. You don't get to pull stunts like this without a lot of practice. At eating.

# ? May 24, 2012 03:54

BHB: Aug 28, 2011

I don't think that's all muscle.

E:f,b

# ? May 24, 2012 03:56

Doug Rattman: Sep 10, 2011; Formerly known as Doug Rattman

graybook posted:

Bilious Slick is on the rather chubby side, one could argue, so I'll stick to that.

I thought that was a tumor, not fat.

# ? May 24, 2012 03:58

gandhichan: Dec 25, 2009; There's a new terror of the skies, bitches.
AND HER HAIR IS PINK.

Considering the humans at least are a bunch of nerds whose social lives are confined to the internet "fat John/Rose/Jane/Roxy etc" isn't really a tough sell for me.

# ? May 24, 2012 04:06

Bongo Bill: Jan 17, 2012

Dirk and Jake have demonstrated considerable athleticism, though that's not necessarily indicative of anything. For that matter, what does Dirk even eat?

# ? May 24, 2012 04:24

Well Manicured Man: Aug 21, 2010; Well Manicured Mort

Bongo Bill posted:

Dirk and Jake have demonstrated considerable athleticism, though that's not necessarily indicative of anything. For that matter, what does Dirk even eat?

Fish. Lots of fish.

# ? May 24, 2012 04:27

Midnight Raider: Apr 26, 2010

Bongo Bill posted:

Dirk and Jake have demonstrated considerable athleticism, though that's not necessarily indicative of anything. For that matter, what does Dirk even eat?

I think that the earlier acts of Homestuck revealed that Dirk's diet obviously consists of metal blades and fireworks.

Edit: Also horse meat.

# ? May 24, 2012 04:36

Silva: Aug 26, 2003; Time is the fire in which we burn

Well Manicured Man posted:

Fish. Lots of fish.

How has he not contracted scurvy at this point?

# ? May 24, 2012 04:36

Hamiltonian Bicycle: Apr 26, 2008; !

Silva posted:

How has he not contracted scurvy at this point?

A whole crawlspace full of orange soda.

# ? May 24, 2012 04:38

Dolash: Oct 23, 2008; aNYWAY,
tHAT'S REALLY ALL THERE IS,
tO REPORT ON THE SUBJECT,
oF ME GETTING HURT,

Hamiltonian Bicycle posted:

A whole crawlspace full of orange soda.

My god, he's thought of everything...

# ? May 24, 2012 04:38

YggiDee: Sep 12, 2007; WASP CREW

Bongo Bill posted:

Dirk and Jake have demonstrated considerable athleticism, though that's not necessarily indicative of anything. For that matter, what does Dirk even eat?

Fish, seagull eggs, orange soda and probably 400 year old freeze-dried MREs.

Poor bastard's got to be craving some fruit. Or spaghetti or something.

# ? May 24, 2012 04:39

Silva: Aug 26, 2003; Time is the fire in which we burn

Hamiltonian Bicycle posted:

A whole crawlspace full of orange soda.

Is that even made of actual oranges, or just artificial flavoring and preservatives and no vitamin C?

# ? May 24, 2012 04:42

Mr. Lobe: Feb 23, 2007; ... Dry bones...

Silva posted:

How has he not contracted scurvy at this point?

He might eat it all raw. That's how the Inuit survived in a land without citrus. Or, of course, Hi-C.

# ? May 24, 2012 04:47

Dolash: Oct 23, 2008; aNYWAY,
tHAT'S REALLY ALL THERE IS,
tO REPORT ON THE SUBJECT,
oF ME GETTING HURT,

YggiDee posted:

Fish, seagull eggs, orange soda and probably 400 year old freeze-dried MREs.

Poor bastard's got to be craving some fruit. Or spaghetti or something.

It's kind of a pity we don't spend much time dwelling on the small, human things. Dirk peeling his first ever orange could be oddly touching, for the cool and in-control hermit youth. Then again if we stopped to explore every opportunity every character presented we'd still be in act 4.

# ? May 24, 2012 04:57

Bobulus: Jan 28, 2007

So I was reading a followup about those people who thought the world was going to end last year, and I noticed some uncomfortable similarities...

quote:

...believers tend to have analytical mindsets. They�re often good at math. I met several engineers, along with a mathematics major and two financial planners. These are people adept at identifying patterns in sets of data, and the methods they used to identify patterns...were frequently impressive, even brilliant. Finding unexpected connections between verses, what believers call comparing scripture with scripture, was a way to become known in the group. The essays they wrote explaining these links could be stunningly intricate.

That intricacy was part of the appeal. The arguments were so complex that they were impossible to summarize and therefore very challenging to refute. As one longtime believer, an accountant, told me: �Based on everything we know, and when you look at the timelines, you look at the evidence�these aren�t the kind of things that just happen. They correlate too strongly for it not to be important.� The puzzle was too perfect. It couldn�t be wrong.

# ? May 24, 2012 05:44

Tuxedo Ted: Apr 24, 2007

Silva posted:

Is that even made of actual oranges, or just artificial flavoring and preservatives and no vitamin C?

Everyone knows that vitamin-c isn't what holds off scurvy. It's the color orange. So naturally, any orange colored food will keep you healthy, like orange soda. Cheetos work well, too.

# ? May 24, 2012 08:00

Pester: Apr 22, 2008; Avatar Fairy? or Fairy Avatar?

Or maybe Dirk does have scurvy. The shades cover the jaundice, and he's working on a set of artificially intelligent dentures.

# ? May 24, 2012 08:10

Tyromancer: Sep 2, 2011; Eglamore looks pretty different.

Pester posted:

Or maybe Dirk does have scurvy. The shades cover the jaundice, and he's working on a set of artificially intelligent dentures.

Each tooth with it's own distinct personality and quirk. Hussie will introduce them to us, one by one, and at first we'll be outraged but over time we'll grow to love them and treasure each one. We'll learn their foibles, hopes and dreams, and wrestle with the themes of the worth of artificial beings.

Then Dirk gets punched in the jaw. None of them survive.

# ? May 24, 2012 08:20

YF-23: Feb 17, 2011; My god, it's full of cat!

Bobulus posted:

So I was reading a followup about those people who thought the world was going to end last year, and I noticed some uncomfortable similarities...

One day, a pastor will enter his church only to find it defiled. Chairs pushed to the side and a pentagram drawn red on the ground. As the pastor approaches it distressed over the heathen acts that took place in this holy ground, the only thing left over by the degenerate scum that caused this meets him.

A set of cue balls.

_{He later finds a shipping wall scribbled on a column.}

# ? May 24, 2012 08:26