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Everything old is new again; we've been discovering the Tiger beatdown post every half-year or so and it's never not funny.
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Jun 14, 2012 03:39
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whowhatwhere posted:Jon is acting like a guy defending against an apocalyptic enemy. His idiocy has nothing to do with Ned but with believing everyone else gets how bad the Others are. His idiotic acts are threefold: 1) PR (which as you said Sam covered, but then he was really the only person Jon could send to be a maester) 2) sending as many people as he did to that village north of the wall (which was made to save lives, gain reinforcements, and deny more bodies to the Others, and was not an Eddard-style honor-driven decision) 3) the Arya thing, where he goes against everything he's been building towards because it's his sister and she's being held by Ramsay loving Snow. None of those are "acting like his father". Exactly. I don't like any of these arcs in the book, but I can't deny their function.
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Jun 14, 2012 04:04
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The only time I would accuse GRRM of resorting to a forced plot device is Renly's death, but he unfolded the consequences too well to find fault with it.
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Jun 14, 2012 04:36
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I didn't much care about Renly in the books but show Renly won my love with his smirking, "Is he a ham?" line. But looking back, yeah. Ned should've ran and should've sided with Renly or at least ran to Stannis. I can't really blame Robb as much. He was just a kid with retarded Stark genes. That makes him good at leading and good at winning fights but poo poo all at anything resembling sensible decisions or self-preservation. Poor Robb. You make *one* decision with your dick and it's game over.
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Jun 14, 2012 04:48
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Bob Baratheon made every decision with his dick and ruled an empire for 15 years. Robb Stark made one decision with his dick and died for it. Bronn never made a decision with his dick and jumped up from nobody to powerful lord who can kill everyone and openly mock the queen without consequence. Conclusion: if your boner is your guide, go whole hog.
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Jun 14, 2012 05:01
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technically it wasn't the dick that hosed him, it was his kindness. Robert would have hosed her and then told her he'd send her a raven someday. e: there's been too much book talk recently. Instead, I'd like to link you all to a metaphor: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9T1vfsHYiKY Which one is GRRM, which the audience and which Dan and David/HBO? whowhatwhere fucked around with this message at 05:09 on Jun 14, 2012 |
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Jun 14, 2012 05:01
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Dany is never actually going to reach Westeros is she? It's the ultimate long-term troll, the side plot that was only vaguely connected with the rest of the story will never actually go anywhere. Dany dies of dysentery and her dragons are so blindsided by Ros' beauty that they accidentally fly into an active volcano. Also everyone starves to death because they've been too busy fighting each other instead of storing food for the upcoming long winter. Fantasy tropes subverted everywhere!
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Jun 14, 2012 05:29
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Dany finally makes it to Westeros in the first chapter of A Dream of Spring and then dies at the end the prologue.
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Jun 14, 2012 05:32
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In It For The Tank posted:Dany finally makes it to Westeros in the first chapter of A Dream of Spring and then dies at the end the prologue.
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Jun 14, 2012 05:35
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I think the last book will prominently feature Drogon raping Cersei, then making GBS threads on her. Then, the cycle will be complete.
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Jun 14, 2012 05:38
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this threads moving at a pretty food clip, but I've skipped most of the posts in the last 5 or so pages because drat thats a lot of words for ideas that most of which have already been expounded on at length AKA gently caress the Tower of Joi and Ly-Stark and Moonboy while we're at it, Step It Up Guys Also now my google search history has "bigmcgaffney hodor dildo" in it so thats a thing that happened
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Jun 14, 2012 06:12
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http://www.airlockalpha.com/node/9199/martin-talks-game-of-thrones-the-winds-of-winter.htmlquote:[W]ith additional season pickups likely considering the show's success, Martin is attempting to buckle down and finish his novels before HBO catches up.
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Jun 14, 2012 08:14
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Why did you bold all those words but not the most important part?quote:[W]ith additional season pickups likely considering the show's success, Martin is attempting to buckle down and finish his novels before HBO catches up.
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Jun 14, 2012 08:37
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Ambiguatron posted:The High Septon dude is the most populist thing we've seen so far, really. I'm not expecting the Englightenment to suddenly emerge in Westeros, that would be silly. How is he populist? he seems like just another Player - running an inquisition while leveraging his people to the greatest advantage. Maybe his talk is populist, but I don't buy that at all...
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Jun 14, 2012 08:44
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Ambiguatron posted:I think the last book will prominently feature Drogon raping Cersei, then making GBS threads on her. Then, the cycle will be complete. Why stop there? I'm expecting a rape orgy involving the whole cast of alive, dead and undead characters all making GBS threads on each other.
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Jun 14, 2012 09:07
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keiran_helcyan posted:Dany is never actually going to reach Westeros is she?
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Jun 14, 2012 10:51
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Rurik posted:Why did you bold all those words but not the most important part? Bleh, I refuse to watch any season of the TV series that will spoil the books. Just no.
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Jun 14, 2012 11:06
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GRRM plays the wild card reversal, book-readers live in fear of being spoiled by tv-watchers
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Jun 14, 2012 11:29
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Azure_Horizon posted:Bleh, I refuse to watch any season of the TV series that will spoil the books. Just no. And if the series finishes years in advance of GRRM?
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Jun 14, 2012 12:09
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In It For The Tank posted:Dany finally makes it to Westeros in the first chapter of A Dream of Spring and then dies at the end the prologue. Dany finally makes it to Westeros in the epilogue of A Dream of Spring, after a time jump of however many years. King Rickon's Winterfell Dragon, Walnutar, promptly roasts her and her dragons. Everybody goes back to whatever they were doing.
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Jun 14, 2012 13:07
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GRRM has nothing to worry about. He's going to get HBO to wild card TV viewers after the 4th season by having them somehow cancel the show.
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Jun 14, 2012 14:34
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whowhatwhere posted:Jon is acting like a guy defending against an apocalyptic enemy. His idiocy has nothing to do with Ned but with believing everyone else gets how bad the Others are. His idiotic acts are threefold: 1) PR (which as you said Sam covered, but then he was really the only person Jon could send to be a maester) 2) sending as many people as he did to that village north of the wall (which was made to save lives, gain reinforcements, and deny more bodies to the Others, and was not an Eddard-style honor-driven decision) 3) the Arya thing, where he goes against everything he's been building towards because it's his sister and she's being held by Ramsay loving Snow. None of those are "acting like his father". He's acting exactly like Ned. He's focusing on the problems, and not the associated politics. The whole Stark thing is about doing right and assuming everyone will jump on board with you. This commonly ends poorly for them.
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Jun 14, 2012 14:50
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Re-reading Storm of Swords 1, Sam Tarly says that Jon gave him various assorted bits of obsidian (from the Fist of the First Men) and a battered old horn. I didn't think anything of the horn from my first couple of read-throughs but huh, is that the Horn of Joramun? Hidden with tons of obsidian so the Others couldn't find it etc?
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Jun 14, 2012 15:02
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Blade_of_tyshalle posted:And if the series finishes years in advance of GRRM? GRRM's long con will be complete, having let someone else finish writing his story while he just gets to sit at home and eat lemoncakes,talk about football, and collect royalty checks.
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Jun 14, 2012 15:25
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I played Mount and Blade yesterday and realized I'd be the worst loving ASOIAF protagonist of all time.GRRM hypothetically would have posted:Commander Calculus then said, 'BRB guys I gotta take a piss.' 'But my Lord, our walls are almost breached and you loving wasted all the goddamn archers' ammo on three loving units clearly meant as cannon fodder.' 'Too bad I gotta take a piss.' And then the Lannisters murdered the gently caress out of all his soldiers while he was taking a piss. Then killed him and chopped of his dick while he took a piss and then fed his dick to Zombie-Gregor. The end.
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Jun 14, 2012 15:27
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Contra Calculus posted:I played Mount and Blade yesterday and realized I'd be the worst loving ASOIAF protagonist of all time. Im playing a knight named Stannis, Im killing everyone almost 6 to 1 or better every fight, Ive saved countless lords in the field andd lifted two sieges.....and all Im offerred is the most raided fief of all time and no one will marry me. I love it.
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Jun 14, 2012 15:43
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Greatbacon posted:GRRM's long con will be complete, having let someone else finish writing his story while he just gets to sit at home and eat lemoncakes,talk about football, and collect royalty checks. If he came out and said he was treating the HBO series as the second draft of the books, so to speak, and would focus on that as a way to end the story because he lacks the energy and it allows him to correct the mistakes he made in plotting out the books, I wouldn't mind. I'm sure someone at Bantam might poo poo a chicken, though.
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Jun 14, 2012 16:02
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Ambiguatron posted:If he came out and said he was treating the HBO series as the second draft of the books, so to speak, and would focus on that as a way to end the story because he lacks the energy and it allows him to correct the mistakes he made in plotting out the books, I wouldn't mind. He really should do this after the 4th season.
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Jun 14, 2012 16:08
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Intel&Sebastian posted:Im playing a knight named Stannis, Im killing everyone almost 6 to 1 or better every fight, Ive saved countless lords in the field andd lifted two sieges.....and all Im offerred is the most raided fief of all time and no one will marry me. Holy crap, that is "LARPier" than anything Skyrim will ever offer.
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Jun 14, 2012 17:17
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Ambiguatron posted:If he came out and said he was treating the HBO series as the second draft of the books, so to speak, and would focus on that as a way to end the story because he lacks the energy and it allows him to correct the mistakes he made in plotting out the books, I wouldn't mind. Yeah, fairly sure he's under contract for 2 more books at least. Either he's going to keep writing or pay pretty much all the money the HBO show has made him I guess.
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Jun 14, 2012 17:29
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Intel&Sebastian posted:Im playing a knight named Stannis, Im killing everyone almost 6 to 1 or better every fight, Ive saved countless lords in the field andd lifted two sieges.....and all Im offerred is the most raided fief of all time and no one will marry me. That's why you launch rebellions and take over the entire loving continent 
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Jun 14, 2012 17:44
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Ambiguatron posted:If he came out and said he was treating the HBO series as the second draft of the books, so to speak, and would focus on that as a way to end the story because he lacks the energy and it allows him to correct the mistakes he made in plotting out the books, I wouldn't mind. To each his own, but I would rather not have an ending than have to watch it on the show.
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Jun 14, 2012 18:04
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The Unnamed One posted:Holy crap, that is "LARPier" than anything Skyrim will ever offer. It's the ultimate ASOIAF battle simulator: You can plot against people, fight against people, die like a loving idiot repeatedly, and get resurrected repeatedly. Graphics leave a lot to be desired, but this is the closest you're going to get to ASOIAF as a proper videogame if you don't like RTS games.
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Jun 14, 2012 18:23
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My perfect ASOIAF video game happens to be a dating simulator. Choose your bride wisely, lest ye plunge the Seven Kingdoms into a neverending civil war.
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Jun 14, 2012 18:27
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I only spent an afternoon looking for one but is there a Mount and Blade mod that gives you the map and cities from ASOIAF? I remember reading about one that was being worked on where they were doing the map, city names and even changing the people's names but I recall they were doing a bunch of other dumb poo poo that they will likely never finish.
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Jun 14, 2012 18:39
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Urdnot Fire posted:It's called gay erasure. The first scene of season 3 is Edd loving Ros' wildling cousin while recapping what happened at the Fist. poo poo no, this is gay erasure.
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Jun 14, 2012 18:40
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Blade_of_tyshalle posted:My perfect ASOIAF video game happens to be a dating simulator. That would own so hard. Like the updated 90's "Mystery Date" with the telephone, only the messages come from a little plastic raven. "You married a Westerling. The Freys are super pissed. Lose your head."
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Jun 14, 2012 18:41
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*ring ring* This is your wife, I've eaten my fingers. Go back 3 spaces or trade places with homliest player.
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Jun 14, 2012 18:56
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Your lackwit wife has birthed a rape baby. What will you name the child?
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Jun 14, 2012 19:05
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"Rivers". 
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Jun 14, 2012 19:19
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