|
How is it possible that each story is better than the last? That last one nearly had me in tears imagining you clucking and flapping your arms like a chicken.
|
#
?
Jul 30, 2012 22:24
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 27, 2024 19:20 |
|
|
I now have the mental picture of you looking like Will Arnett doing the chicken dance on Arrested Development.
|
|
#
?
Jul 30, 2012 22:48
|
|
|
Bearnt! posted:How is it possible that each story is better than the last? That last one nearly had me in tears imagining you clucking and flapping your arms like a chicken. This OP is sounding more and more like Angry Bee Dance on meth.
|
|
#
?
Jul 31, 2012 07:26
|
|
|
jase1 posted:I don't consider that a bad beat at all, I played the hand poorly and the reason being is I am not a tournament player. If that was a cash game I probably make that play all day because I can rebuy and work on getting my money back. In this tourney one mistake like that and I'm out. Also the best hand preflop won so it's really not a bad beat in my eyes. That would be like the worst fold in the history of folds.
|
|
#
?
Jul 31, 2012 07:54
|
|
|
coyo7e posted:This OP is sounding more and more like Angry Bee Dance on meth. I disagree, Jase is actually a good poster and his stories are about gambling and lately drunken antics surrounding gambling - in other words, things that could actually happen. Comparing him to ABD is just criminal 
|
|
#
?
Jul 31, 2012 14:07
|
|
|
Poolhall Junkies was mentioned earlier in this thread so I streamed it from Netflix last night. It's so bad it's good, until it gets boring in the last act with the typical hero must beats the odds stuff. Before that though, it's just a hilarious mess of acting in an obvious attempt at Rounders meets Swingers. And the protagonist is obviously based on a Ben Affleck type character. He even looks like him. I suggest anyone watch this flick.
|
|
#
?
Jul 31, 2012 21:17
|
|
|
I don't know, Pool Hall Junkies is easily the most entertaining pool movie I've come across and I have definitely watched my share. The acting is pretty bad, but that's standard for an indie movie and yeah it's a little cliched, but pretty much every sports movie is guilty of that. I must have watched it 40 or 50 times and never get tired of it.
|
|
#
?
Jul 31, 2012 21:26
|
|
|
blah_blah posted:That would be like the worst fold in the history of folds. I didn't wanna bring in poker strategy into the thread but this is correct. There are more combos of hands you beat than lose to in his range. You lose to Q5(unlikely for him to have) and 55 and beat all the Qx combos and tie with AQ.
|
|
#
?
Jul 31, 2012 21:54
|
|
|
Christopher Walken is in Poolhall Junkies. Ergo, everyone should watch Poolhall Junkies.
|
|
#
?
Jul 31, 2012 22:01
|
|
|
Spiffo posted:I disagree, Jase is actually a good poster and his stories are about gambling and lately drunken antics surrounding gambling - in other words, things that could actually happen. Comparing him to ABD is just criminal Just replace "gambling" with "high end hotel".
|
|
#
?
Aug 1, 2012 01:19
|
|
|
Day 3 I slept until about 4pm getting some rest because I still had a couple days left in Vegas and most of us left this day open in case we made it far in the tourney. Which of course no one did make it past day 1 and all our pipe dreams of being professional poker players were shot down in less than 12 hours. Everyone does there own thing so I go meet up with a buddy who lives in Vegas and he hooks me up with some weed and we get high and hang out for awhile and catch up. We grew up together and he got out of Ohio the first chance he could get and moved to Vegas to be an electrician. He doesn't gamble or drink he just gets high all day and basically works in casinos doing electrical work. After we hang for a few hours I decide to head to The Venetian to play some poker for the rest of the night. I have always heard that when people walk into a casino they hear the slot machines going off and the lights and people get addicted to that. For me it's the minute I get close enough to the poker room. I hear the chips being shuffled, various bad beat stories, dealers yelling for racks, sometimes you hear a table celebrate or go oh and ah at a big card on the river. I am addicted to that I am pretty sure if I was just strolling down the street and heard the shuffling of chips I would just follow the sound and buy in at whatever game it was. The Venetian is a huge poker room and it's packed because of the WSOP every table is full and there is a waiting list that looks a mile long. I put my name on the list and go get some grub before my long night of playing poker. I eat and come back and after what seems like an eternity my name gets called for a 1/2 seat. I get my chips and walk over to my table and I see Slacks and Meat sitting at the table and they are always fun to gamble with so this table should be interesting. Right when I sit down I start chatting up the table to see what type of players are there. There is a brother and sister sitting at the table across from each other and I played with them a few times so far because they remember me. They are Asian and we strike up a conversation about where they are from. We become friendly and the whole table actually is having a really good time. The guy next to me is a local and usually locals in Vegas card rooms in my opinion are assholes. They always want everything to run perfect but they don't realize that the tourists are the reason they have all this. I am taking a guess here but this guy can't be any younger than 70 he has a cane and several times when he left the table to smoke he had a really bad limp. I knew he was a local because every dealer that sat down knew him by name and he knew the dealers. He was okay and didn't complain to much and he even joined in on the laughs we were having and seemed to be having a good time. So me and the local get involved in a hand. The board reads 77559 I have A7 in my hand for a full house and I push all in and he calls. I show my A7 and he shows just his 7 in his hand and mucks his cards. We are both laughing and I jokingly say since you mucked and didn't show both cards I win the whole pot. I never had the intention of taking the whole pot I was just making joke but the old guy got really furious and started breathing really hard and kind pushed some of his weight towards me. I tell the old man to back off I was only kidding and he gets in my face tells me to gently caress off. Now I lose my cool and I am pissed so I look at the dealer and tell him since he mucked I get the whole pot. The dealer has a really somber look on his face and calls the local by name and says "sorry but he is right and the rules are the rules". Before I can start to scoop my pot the old man calls the floor over. The floor comes over and the dealer explains the situation and then the floor comes over to the old man and he explains the situation to the floor. Both of their stories are the same and the floor says unfortunately it's a rule if your hand touches the muck before both cards are turned over then its a fold and the other player wins. You have to show both cards to win a pot. I tell the floor guy I was actually just joking and was ready to split the pot but the guy got in my face and pissed me off so I want the whole pot he agrees and they push the whole pot to me. The old man is furious and he keeps yapping in my face calling me names and things like that. I tell him look man at first I was only goofing around but since you want to get in my face and tell me to gently caress off I will be a dick and play by the rules. The man is getting to the point where I think he is going to hit me. I am okay with that because really if he does hit me he will be kicked out and it probably won't hurt. Slacks and Meat who were sitting at the table are now embarrassed and they are racking up their chips to leave. I decide to do the same and while I am racking up my chips the old man looks me dead in the eye and says I better watch myself going to my car. Now that is a direct threat and if it was anyone else capable of coming through with that threat I don't know what I would have done to be honest but my only reaction with this 70 year old man breathing fire 2 inches from my face was to laugh as hard and as loud as I could right in his face. It only makes things worse and the old man cocks his fist like he is getting ready to punch me and at this time the dealer calls the floor over and they grab the old man pull him away from the table and speak to him. Slacks and Meat are dying laughing now because I was 2 seconds away from fighting an old man and I know I could have taken him. I cash out and decide to go have a few drinks and let things cool down before I go back to the poker room to play again. Before I leave the poker room the Asian girl catches up to me and says I was in the right in the situation and I tell her it's not a big deal and I will be back later to play some more poker and she says great with a huge smile on her face and I think to myself that I might have a shot with her. We end up meeting a few friends at the golden nugget and we party the rest of the night on Fremont street and on the strip until about 5 am and then head back to the room.
|
|
#
?
Aug 2, 2012 19:50
|
|
|
Great thread, thanks for all the stories they are really fun to read. One question though, in your most recent story when there is a tie do you split the pot? Sorry for the dumb question, I just don't know poker that well.
Streebs fucked around with this message at 00:28 on Aug 3, 2012 |
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2012 00:23
|
|
|
blah_blah posted:That would be like the worst fold in the history of folds. The only way I could possibly find a fold is if the guy shoves all in. Then he screams "gently caress yeah! Red fives take down the Death Star!" He would then have to fist pump to the rail and high five his buddies pointing to both if his hands as if his five fingers are significant, while screaming like Rick Flair. Only then would I consider folding.
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2012 01:42
|
|
|
Streebs posted:Great thread, thanks for all the stories they are really fun to read. One question though, in your most recent story when there is a tie do you split the pot? Sorry for the dumb question, I just don't know poker that well. I was wondering about that too. I assumed always that on a full house type situation Ace High wouldn't factor in. I only played poker a few times, and never in a casino so I have no idea.
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2012 04:28
|
|
|
Nimrod's Son posted:I was wondering about that too. I assumed always that on a full house type situation Ace High wouldn't factor in. I only played poker a few times, and never in a casino so I have no idea. You're correct. The ace kicker doesn't play on a full house and the pot is chopped (split) in the event of a tie.
|
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2012 04:55
|
|
|
^ This. In poker (or at least, in Texas Hold 'Em, the most common variant), you have two cards in your hand and five (eventually) on the table, from which you make the best hand of at most five cards. That can be two of yours and three from the table (others can still use the table cards in their hands even if you do), one of yours and four from the table, or all from the table (though everyone can have that, so you're at best going to split the pot). Given your eventual hand is five, even if you have say A7 in your hand with 77559 on the board, your best hand of five is 77755, and we ignore the A and the 9. The fact that the other guy had a 7 meant that his best hand was also 77755 - the reason he didn't show the other card was because it was (technically) irrelevant (though it would have been valuable to Jase as information, which is why there're often penalties for not showing your full hand). As an aside, this 'two private cards, five public cards' system is what makes Texas Hold 'Em so popular (and far better than traditional 'everybody has five private cards, the end' versions). Because you all can see some central shared cards, you can work out a little of what the other players have in their hands, so it's much more about working out what the other players are 'saying' with their bets than just lucking into the best hand and pushing all in. Texas Hold 'Em poker is much more about maximising your winnings than having the best hand - A handful of aces may seem great but if you scare everyone off the pot because you're so confident you'll win it, there's not going to be much money in there when you do win it. EddieDean fucked around with this message at 08:45 on Aug 3, 2012 |
|
#
?
Aug 3, 2012 08:38
|
|
|
Bearnt! posted:How is it possible that each story is better than the last? That last one nearly had me in tears imagining you clucking and flapping your arms like a chicken. That was a gem wasnt it? Lol I like how hes not even looking at his cards anymore to further drive the point home.
|
|
#
?
Aug 6, 2012 00:52
|
|
|
I really hope we're not out of stories here. Been way too long since the last update.
|
|
#
?
Aug 14, 2012 07:23
|
|
|
Yeah me too, I'm scared to check out Ask/Tell, for fear of there being no updates in this thread 
|
|
#
?
Aug 14, 2012 21:49
|
|
|
I still have a lot more stories it has just been a few hectic weeks at work and I haven't been able to sit down and do this. I will finish up the Vegas stories later but right now let me tell you about my birthday party from 2 weeks ago. Every year I have a party for my birthday most of the time it's with some family and friends just going out to eat and get a few drinks. This year turned out to be quite crazy. I invited my friend Hiphop he is also my bookie. Hiphop became apart of the group of people I hang around with about 6 years ago. He showed up at this lawyers house we were playing poker at and I hated him. I am laughing as I type that because I really did hate him, he was loud, annoying, obnoxious, cocky and he was just like me and after getting to know him we became really good friends. About a 2 years ago he decided to take action as a bookie on all the degenerates we know including me. I use him and have paid him a lot of money you will see that if you follow the gambling on sports threads. I am the worst sports bettor but I enjoy it. He is a great poker player, excellent golfer, and he thinks he is a world class dart player. I talked earlier in the thread about hustling him out of some money with this lady I know who is a professional dart player and I just hadn't had the chance to set him up yet. I will get to that in a few though. So I invite hip and his girlfriend and then he invites another friend of ours and in a few days it has turned into about 25 people showing up for this party. I now have to make reservations at Fox and Hound so I can get the tables right by the pool table and dart boards considering that is what most people will be on all night. So it comes to the night of my birthday party and about 2 hours before I realize this would be the perfect time to set hip up and get some money out of him. So I call Linda up and see if she is available to come to my party tonight and if the opportunity arises we can make some money off hip and she is pumped about her first hustle. The backstory on Linda is I was at this bar one night hustling a guy for just for a few hundred bucks and when I went up to the bartender to get a drink Linda noticed me and we began chatting. She knew right away what I was doing and was really interested in the art of hustling. So after I am done shooting with the other guy Linda and I sit around and bullshit for a few hours about my lifestyle and hers. She came from Canada and was a professional dart player until she opened up some type of graphic design buisness here in Ohio. She was always fascinated with hustling because she said she wanted to try it with darts. So I tell her all about what I do and how I do it and I told her I would keep her # and she can come watch me anytime. She use to come up and sit with my girlfriend and keep her company when I hustle guys and they became friends. So Linda is in and when she gets to the bar I meet her outside and talk to her and let her know that I will front all the money and whatever she wins we will split it evenly. She is fine with that and we are ready to go. The party is going good, My uncle Frank shows up and we decide to gamble a little bit, well I should say I talked poo poo to him until he finally gave in played me. He gave me 5-2 race for $250 and I could break every time. He beat me 5-1 and I the only reason I won one game was because he scratched on the 8ball on this really weird shot. One day I will beat him for money and when it happens it's going to be the pinnacle of my pool playing days. I don't care if he is 150 I will beat him before he dies. The alcohol is flowing pretty heavily now (I had a chocolate covered pretzel shot which was loving delicious by the way) and everyone is having a good time. Hip is shooting darts with the rich guy who he has a prop bet with the score on that is 44-0 and hip has to win 100 before the guy wins 1 for 1k. They are playing cricket which I have only played a hand full of times but basically you have to close out numbers between 15-20 to win. I don't know the full rules but it's something like that. Hip is pretty drunk kind of like all of us and I decide to make my move. I call next game and tell him that I think I can beat him in 501 where you have to go from 501 to 0 and you have to hit a double to go out. Now he knows I am loving around but I am just laying the groundwork. We play a few games and a lot of people are watching now because there is a lot of poo poo talking going on. He beats me 3 games in a row and then on the 4th game I come within inches of hitting a double 20 to go out. He of course beats me again and I tell him it was luck. He starts bragging about how he is the best dart player in the area and I tell him he is full of poo poo which is common occurrences with us. I always call bullshit on him like he does to me it's a friendly rivalry that we have going. He tells me that he will play anyone for any amount of money. He goes to take a piss and I tell Linda now is our time to make a move. I tell her when he gets back from the bathroom she needs to take his challenge and all she has to do is beat him. No money on the line just beat him but make it look like you were lucky and play it up that you are drunk and just having a good time. Hip comes back from the bathroom grabs his darts and says who is next. Linda steps up and says she wants to play. Naturally hip makes a joke about how this will be quick and I can see his ego is growing. Linda almost doesn't beat him but hits a nice double 4 to go out and she does a great job of making it look like luck. When she wins she is jumping up and down and screaming and laughing with my girlfriend and hips girlfriend. She is playing it perfect and hip is pissed. My friend slacks was there and he goes into instant needle mode and starts busting hips balls for losing to a girl who has no clue what she is doing. Hip's own girlfriend is laughing at him now and he is about to lose it. He says it would never happen again in a million years and she just looks at him and says it doesn't matter because it just happened in front of everybody after you were talking poo poo. Hip does exactly what I want him to do and he challenges her to another game she declines and says she wants to go out a winner and hip calls her a chicken. He says she is scared and he knows it was just a fluke. Hip pulls out $100 puts on the table and says he will bet $100 that it wont happen again. She says she doesn't have that kind of money to gamble with and hip again starts to tell her she is scared and it was a fluke. I walk over pull out $500 and put it on the table and tell him I will cover her but only if you bet $500. He couldn't pull his money out fast enough and Linda does a great job of acting like she couldn't do that to me. I tell her don't worry about it just go up there and beat him again no pressure just forget about the money. Hip now starts jaw jacking with me telling me how dumb I am, he even goes as far to say that the only reason I am staking her is because she is hot. I laugh it off and tell him to go shoot before I change my mind. Now at this time all the people that were at the party are watching and you can tell people are excited about this. I say since it's my money on the line I want to keep score. So figuring this is going to be so much fun I start using my best British voice impersonating those guys on the dart shows yelling out #'s when they throw their darts. I am doing the whole commentary routine and my friend slacks joins right in with me. It's great we are busting hips balls the whole time and everyone is laughing. Linda crushes him at one point she hit 2 triple 20's in a row and she is still playing the part of a novice dart player. Hips face is the best and he can't believe what is happening. He tells us that it was because we were loving with him the whole time thats why he lost. I call bullshit and tell him just face it, Linda, a girl is better at darts then you. He says no way and wants to shoot her again. I tell him lets do it for 1k. He says right away lets do it I need to win my money back. I ask him if he is sure because there is no going back once you put the money on the table it's a bet. He pulls out 1k like nothing puts it on the table and says lets do it. I say no problem put the 1k on the table and let him know that Linda won't need to use his darts this time. He gets this blank stare on his face and says why, Linda goes over to her purse and grabs her set of darts out of it and says because I brought my own. The only thing I hear now with about 25 people standing around watching this is this guy say "aw man hip you are hosed and I am enjoying every minute of this". Hip now knows he has been hustled and there is no way out he just needs to take his rear end whipping like a man. Linda beats him badly again I grab the 1k and I give Linda her cut of $750 and Hip looks at me and says "you dicklicker you set me up". I smile at him and buy him a drink and let him know I just needed to win back some of the money I am losing to him on sports booking. He takes it in stride and I buy everyone drinks and we party until they kick us out. It was one of my best birthday parties ever and Hip and Linda are now going to try and hustle some other guys that hip knows. She is hooked and can't wait to do it again. She is a natural hustler and my girlfriend was telling me she told her all about how to act and what to do so she was practicing at home how to act drunk and stuff. I saw hip again the other night at the Casino and he still couldn't believe it but he he said they are going to make so much money together hustling guys at darts so it all worked out in the end.
|
|
#
?
Aug 14, 2012 22:56
|
|
|
You sir are a bad influence. But seriously that was one of my favorite stories yet. The actual reveal of the darts she'd brought was a nice touch.
|
|
#
?
Aug 14, 2012 23:24
|
|
|
Wow that is an awesome story, keep it up, this is a great thread! The only bar game I'm good at is foosball, too bad it isn't so popular anymore.
|
|
#
?
Aug 15, 2012 16:23
|
|
|
Streebs posted:Wow that is an awesome story, keep it up, this is a great thread! The only bar game I'm good at is foosball, too bad it isn't so popularanymore. In my hometown, there is 1 table (besides personal ones). And it is small and lovely. The good thing is people enjoy playing it. The great thing is that almost everyone is terrible except for me and my two buddies who used to play with my dad every night at his house. We don't make big money like Jase, but it's a good way to get free drinks!
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2012 03:49
|
|
|
Jase, your stories are incredible. Question : Can you spot someone else hustling, and if so is it right away, or does it take a little while?
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2012 20:43
|
|
|
After reading all your stories I'd really like to start playing in my free time. As someone who has literally picked up a stick once in my entire life, what's the best way to become not terrible at the game? Should I just head to the local billiards club and play solo a few hours a week? Are there drills or mechanical work I should do to develop a basic stroke or is it something that will come from just playing enough?
|
|
#
?
Aug 18, 2012 23:53
|
|
|
Do you find that most of your pool hustling friends are good poker players? I know that the games are totally different, but I've always felt the biggest part of poker (other than calculating odds) is to play in a way that makes people put more money into the pot when you've got a strong hand. I imagine that that kind of thing would be a pretty natural transition from hustling pool. Like for example is your Uncle Frank a pretty good poker player as well?
|
|
#
?
Aug 19, 2012 17:13
|
|
|
Yeonik posted:Jase, your stories are incredible. It may take a full game or two but I can usually spot it pretty quickly. I can sometimes spot it by the way they break or hold the stick. Also there are certain shots that average pool players would never try that an experienced pool player will do and that will give it away fast. Waroduce posted:After reading all your stories I'd really like to start playing in my free time. As someone who has literally picked up a stick once in my entire life, what's the best way to become not terrible at the game? Should I just head to the local billiards club and play solo a few hours a week? Are there drills or mechanical work I should do to develop a basic stroke or is it something that will come from just playing enough? Practice will never hurt you but you need to learn how to hold the stick and do a proper stroke. Take an empty plastic coke bottle and lay it on the pool table and practice your stroke by trying to hit the inside back of the coke bottle without touching the sides of it. It is boring and annoying but if you can keep a steady stroke it will do wonders for your pool game. Another thing you need to learn is defense if you have no shot then try to make sure your oppenet does not have a shot on their next turn. Defense in my opinion is one of the most important parts of pool especially against casual players. Nimrod's Son posted:Do you find that most of your pool hustling friends are good poker players? I know that the games are totally different, but I've always felt the biggest part of poker (other than calculating odds) is to play in a way that makes people put more money into the pot when you've got a strong hand. I imagine that that kind of thing would be a pretty natural transition from hustling pool. No not really there are couple of guys who play poker but they aren't very good they just have pockets of money and love to gamble. Uncle Frank is an awful Poker player and won't even sit down with me to play poker anymore because either me or whoever he is paying with cleans him out. I use to love to go to weekend pool tournaments in a hotel because we would shoot pool all day and then go play poker in the hotel rooms all night. I use to clean up at those events at the poker games. Guys would have a great day at the pool table then gamble it all away at the poker table.
|
|
#
?
Aug 21, 2012 22:16
|
|
|
jase1 posted:It may take a full game or two but I can usually spot it pretty quickly. I can sometimes spot it by the way they break or hold the stick. Also there are certain shots that average pool players would never try that an experienced pool player will do and that will give it away fast. What are some examples of said shots? With how they hold the cue, is it just a matter of how comfortable they look, or do you notice specific things? As an aside, it'd be really cool if there was a website to quickly diagram these pool shots. Someone get to work!
|
|
#
?
Aug 22, 2012 19:23
|
|
|
muskrat posted:What are some examples of said shots? With how they hold the cue, is it just a matter of how comfortable they look, or do you notice specific things? Anytime I see a casual pool player make a defensive shot to put their opponent in a bad spot I get suspicious. I have shot a lot of pool in my life and thats one thing that 99.9% of bar room pool players and casual players just don't do unless they know how to really shoot pool. I notice the bridge but mainly I notice the stroke if it is really smooth and they use correct speed on certain shots then that can tip me off too. Last Vegas story for my trip in '06. I have Mentioned Meats a few times before in this thread but never really talked about him. When I first met Meats he showed up at the local cigar store game and he was a disgusting vile human being. His teeth are yellow and rotted, he had a huge goiter in his neck that made it look like he swallowed a Chipotle burrito and it got stuck. He never combed his hair and he smelled. For him being that disgusting he was a very intelligent individual. He was in law school at case western reserve, sometimes I thought he was a math genius at the way he figured out odds and percentages, and he was a phenomenal poker player. Unless I had a big hand I tried not to get involved with him in big pots because I was scared of his poker game. After Meat showed up to the game a few times I got to talking to him he asked me what I did for a living and I told him my profession. He was shocked he thought I was a pro poker player and I thought that was weird so I asked him why and he said because the all the times I see you playing poker you win. I laughed it off and told him if he sticks around long enough he will see me lose like everyone else does. Meats was always the butt of everyone's jokes and he brought a lot of it on himself. Sometimes we would order pizza and Meats always had to have a a whole pizza to himself and he usually ate the left overs, he was so lazy once that he asked The Godfather if he really needed to walk all the way to other side of the cigar store to cash out because he would be tired it was about 10 steps total to get to the other side of the cigar store. Meats was also an amazing golfer and the other golfers in the group hated that because they prided themselves on being in shape and walking the course and being great golfers and Meats would show up and take all their money on the course while riding a cart eating anything he possibly get from the gift shop. I once watched him finish off a sandwich while driving the cart to the next tee and talking on his cell phone at the same time he was disgusting but so very entertaining. I wouldn't say me and Meats were great friends we were just acquaintances mostly but I would always give him advice about stop acting like a slob. He wanted a girlfriend so bad but never did anything to attract women so I would try to encourage him to exercise and stop eating so much but he never did. Flash forward a few years and off to Vegas we go. Meats had never been to Vegas before so this was all new to him and he was a like a kid in a candy store. So many women, so many places to play poker and so much different food I thought he was going to just eat himself into a coma. After we had played the WSOP event and everyone was knocked out the next day we walked down to watch a 1k rebuy tourney where we had heard Daniel Negreanu had rebought 46 times or something like that I can't remember the exact # of rebuys. We walk into the Amazon ballroom and Phil Helmuth was there playing in a tourney that was down to 2 tables so I decided to watch that while Meats went into the Milwaukee Best tent to do what else but get some more food. During that time Helmuth hit an huge hand and had a huge stack in front of him and after he won the hand he stood up and high fived me. I thought that was pretty cool because I watched him being an rear end in a top hat all this time on tv but in person he was actually a pretty decent guy. It's mostly an act with him and most people should know that by now but when they decided to take a break he sat around for at least 20 minutes or so chatting with everyone and taking pictures and signing autographs. I was pretty excited meeting him because I had these visions at the time about being a pro so this was a big deal to me. After Helmuth walked away I went to find Meats I walked into the tent got a beer and saw a little crowd around this small basketball machine. I walked over and there was Meat playing on the machine and he was kicking everyone's rear end in the game. I looked and standing right next to him was Mike "the Mouth " Matasow and Jean Robert Bellande and Joe Cassidy all pretty famous poker players at the time. Meats had walked up to them and asked them for an autograph and they said only if he plays them in this basketball game for $100. So Meats proceeded to beat all 3 of them and take $300 bucks off those guys and that was an awesome experience. So Meats was gambling more with them this time they were flipping for drinks and Meats just kept winning and the group of people around were eating it up. No one was making fun of Meats he was winning money and he was the center of attention at that moment so it was a really cool experience for him. Now we all know hookers are everywhere in Vegas I have lost track at how many times I have been approached by hookers so you can imagine with the WSOP going the amount of hookers in the area was probably doubled. Well one really hot blonde noticed Meat and must have thought he was a pro because he was hanging around the other pros and she approached him about getting together. Meats has never had a woman approach him so he did the only thing he knew to do was not say anything and walk away. So Meats comes up to me while I am drinking at the bar and tells me that this girl approached him and he got scared and ran. I told him is that something you want and he says yes he does. I tell him to go tell her what you want and you guys can talk about the details and you can take her back to your room and do whatever you want. He says to me so should I just say I want a blowjob and I am laughing now because I realize Meats has no clue what to do. I tell him lets go I will talk to her for you and I ask him what price range he is looking for. He says he doesn't care he just wants a blow job I say perfect lets go. We walk around the corner and there she is sitting on Jean Robert's lap and it looks like he stole Meats hooker. I tell Meats just sit here and I will go talk to her. I walk up to her while she is sitting on this famous Pro's lap and I tell her I know someone who wants to hook up. She gets up and I tell her my friend Meat would like to get a blowjob she says no problem how much is he looking to spend and I told her it would be his first time with a girl so could you make him feel really good because as you can tell he is not the greatest looking guy. She tells me for $500 she will make it the best night he has ever had all he has to do is shower and not smell and she will make it worth his while. I tell her to give me a sec I go over and talk to Meat and let him know to give me 5 hundred go up to your room and shower and shave and look like a decent human being for once and she will take care of you. He looks at me in bewilderment and says do you really think she will blow me and it takes a few minutes to convince him to trust me. He gives me them money and heads upstairs and says to give him 30 minutes I say no problem. He goes off to the room and I go back to talk to her. I tell her he is going up to the room now to get a shower and look respectable and I take her over to the bar and buy her a drink while we wait. I tell her thanks a lot he is new at this and I wouldn't be surprised if he still a virgin so please show him a good time. We chat for a few and she is really cool and open about her job and then we head over to the room. We get to Meats room and before she goes in I give her the cash and tell her if you really take care of him I will tip you another $100 just come to my room next door after your done. I go back to my room take a shower and watch some tv while waiting for Meats to finally get some action. About 30 mins later there is a knock on the door and its her I ask her how it went and she says he seemed happy. I call the Meats room and ask him how things went and his only words were that was the best 30 minutes of my life. I give her a $100 and thank her for really making Meats week she says no problem thanks for me the tip and asks if I would like to get a blow job now I tell her no thanks and send her on her way. We go to dinner that night and I tell all the guys the story and Meats is just loving glowing he is so happy. The guys bust his balls but he doesn't give a poo poo and that night he won over $1500 in poker and according to him it was the best night in his life. Meats stopped playing poker about a year ago and come to find out he was blowing through an inheritance that his parents left him. He had graduated law school but never did anything with the degree. His bills started piling up and he just stopped coming around. Last I heard he was working for a company selling some type of cable service and he finally got good enough insurance to get that disgusting goiter removed from his neck now lets hope he gets his teeth fixed and then he is on his way to being a normal looking person.
|
|
#
?
Aug 24, 2012 21:04
|
|
|
You, good sir, are a great friend!
|
|
#
?
Aug 24, 2012 22:29
|
|
|
These characters are straight out of novels!
|
|
#
?
Aug 25, 2012 08:22
|
|
|
jase1 posted:
I don't know if I'm reading this right but if you are a dog in any NL game where any of the players are getting it in for 1500 bb's on the flop with 88 on any 7 (non-8) (non-8) board then you should probably just quit poker all together.
|
|
#
?
Aug 25, 2012 12:12
|
|
|
TheAbortionator posted:I don't know if I'm reading this right but if you are a dog in any NL game where any of the players are getting it in for 1500 bb's on the flop with 88 on any 7 (non-8) (non-8) board then you should probably just quit poker all together. He's gone out of his way to say he's not a great poker player multiple times. And acting like you can evaluate a player's poker ability based on 1 hand he's not even involved in is ridiculous and it's irrelevant to the thread anyway.
|
|
#
?
Aug 25, 2012 12:36
|
|
|
Sorry the hand is just insanely fishy. The dude with the 88 is either the worst player in the history of the deck. Or a cold deck artist.
|
|
#
?
Aug 25, 2012 14:05
|
|
|
Schweinhund posted:He's gone out of his way to say he's not a great poker player multiple times. And acting like you can evaluate a player's poker ability based on 1 hand he's not even involved in is ridiculous and it's irrelevant to the thread anyway. Just to be clear I was not playing the hand that game was way over my head in terms of how much money was on the line. I was there because I brought Tito to the game. Second I see poo poo like that all the time at the poker table. More than likely the guy with pocket 8's was a fish and just enjoyed the action. I don't remember who the guy was though and I could be mistaken about the hand but it doesn't seem fishy to me I have seen far crazier poo poo than that. Have you ever seen a fish play at a casino making 50 dollar calls with A high? I see it once a week. Thursday night I was playing in a 1/1 game max buy in 160 and 2 players had over 1100 in front of them at the same time and at the end of the night they both busted out. They were fish who just love to gamble and I love having those people at my table. 10 high flop 3 spades on the flop fish 1 calls an all in for over $350 making a $700 plus pot he has 10 5 and no spade in his hand and the turn is a 10 and the river is a 5 giving him the boat. The other player had flopped the nut flush. If you haven't seen stupid poo poo like that then you are playing at the wrong poker games because every game I go to has a couple of fish who have money and just love the action.
|
|
#
?
Aug 25, 2012 16:14
|
|
|
Maybe a boring question, but whats the longest you've played poker for without really dropping into a hand? Is the amount of action in poker slower or faster than in pool?
|
|
#
?
Aug 25, 2012 16:49
|
|
|
Uncle Jam posted:Maybe a boring question, but whats the longest you've played poker for without really dropping into a hand? The first question is hard to really answer because of the way poker is played I often time limp in and play a hand. I am very aggressive player though and I don't sit around and wait for a hand to play with. So unless I have a huge stack and I am in lockdown mode I am playing a hand every couple of hands. There are stretches where I am folding because I get nothing but that doesn't happen a lot. I play situational poker so sometimes the cards don't even matter. Pool is faster just because you are up and down at the table and a game can take 10 to 20 minutes. Poker can be slower paced because of all the other people playing with you.
|
|
#
?
Aug 28, 2012 21:38
|
|
|
Amalek posted:These characters are straight out of novels! Because they seem to be fiction?
|
|
#
?
Sep 1, 2012 02:37
|
|
|
jase1 posted:I play situational poker so sometimes the cards don't even matter. I was going to ask about this. Does it matter what cards you get if you are a good player?
|
|
#
?
Sep 1, 2012 11:36
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 27, 2024 19:20 |
|
|
Another pool guy chiming in. I also played in the APA in Tampa here for a while, but always played out of Fatsos. Your league must have run slightly differently, as the league always paid for the division champs to get to Vegas, so the only money we needed was for play, and of course the damned tables you have to pay for yourself like in the mini tournys and such. If you're ever in the Tampa area, Fatsos is where the gamblers are. I miss hanging out with New York Blackie (RIP). There's always the old guy crowd in the back, always bitchin and moaning while gambling back there.
|
|
#
?
Sep 6, 2012 18:54
|
|
