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utada posted:Biden Implores Obama To 'Rub One Out' Before Debate Came here to post this.
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# ? Oct 4, 2012 03:14 |
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# ? May 19, 2024 15:08 |
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The worst part about all the debate jokes is that they seem, to me at any rate, to have been pre-written. They expected Romney to bomb, and he didn't. It doesn't bode well.
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# ? Oct 4, 2012 07:13 |
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utada posted:Biden Implores Obama To 'Rub One Out' Before Debate I wish the Onion version of Biden was real.
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# ? Oct 4, 2012 08:32 |
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Admiral Bosch posted:The worst part about all the debate jokes is that they seem, to me at any rate, to have been pre-written. They expected Romney to bomb, and he didn't. It doesn't bode well. Though if it was pre-written, "Panicking Romney tries to fire debate moderator" works even better
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# ? Oct 4, 2012 08:37 |
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Biden, Joe
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# ? Oct 4, 2012 09:56 |
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http://www.theonion.com/articles/sasha-obama-asks-father-why-he-was-acting-like-suc,29795/ drat straight.
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# ? Oct 4, 2012 21:36 |
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Ahahaha http://www.theonion.com/articles/mitt-romney-adopts-new-ronnie-ferocious-persona-fo,29789/ "Mitt Romney Adopts New ‘Ronnie Ferocious’ Persona For Debates"
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# ? Oct 4, 2012 22:27 |
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DarkCrawler posted:Ahahaha This was on last night, while the one calling Obama a pussy was posted this morning. Was it posted after the debates aired? Dr Christmas has a new favorite as of 02:27 on Oct 5, 2012 |
# ? Oct 4, 2012 22:42 |
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SpiderHyphenMan posted:http://www.theonion.com/articles/sasha-obama-asks-father-why-he-was-acting-like-suc,29795/ Should have taken Biden's advice.
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# ? Oct 4, 2012 23:50 |
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SpiderHyphenMan posted:http://www.theonion.com/articles/sasha-obama-asks-father-why-he-was-acting-like-suc,29795/ I think you got the thing inside of and outside of the url tags reversed. This is what you're looking for: Sasha Obama Asks Father Why He Was Acting Like Such A Pussy During Debate
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# ? Oct 5, 2012 02:10 |
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This, as well as the other facts posted about past presidents on Facebook is reason enough to pre-order the Onions's "Book of Known Knowledge". (Also "Our Dumb World" is one of the funniest books ever)
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# ? Oct 5, 2012 02:43 |
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ChocolateMoose posted:This, as well as the other facts posted about past presidents on Facebook is reason enough to pre-order the Onions's "Book of Known Knowledge". (Also "Our Dumb World" is one of the funniest books ever) It's tied with "Our dumb century" for funniest books ever, to be real.
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# ? Oct 5, 2012 03:18 |
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I read Our Dumb World about once a year and it always kills me. The simplicity of "Minnesota - Land of 10,000 Retards" will never not make me laugh.
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# ? Oct 5, 2012 03:56 |
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http://www.theonion.com/articles/office-cheering-on-employee-going-for-32minute-non,29689/ Office Cheering On Employee Going For 32 Minute Nonstop Work Streak (makes me think of my office)
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# ? Oct 6, 2012 19:39 |
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New Study Finds Majority of Bullshit Calls go to Other Team The part of me that is reasonably intelligent likes this article for the humor. On the other hand, my inner-sports fan is screaming "I loving knew it!"
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# ? Oct 6, 2012 20:19 |
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the_steve posted:New Study Finds Majority of Bullshit Calls go to Other Team It's extra hilarious for me cause I have friends who publish in JQAS, so I get to send this around and ask why they didn't get to it first.
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# ? Oct 6, 2012 22:40 |
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I don't remember seeing this here, but this thread is getting to be pretty long: Remains Of Ancient Race Of Job Creators Found In Rust Belt
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# ? Oct 8, 2012 22:38 |
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Romney: 'This Is Why They Call Me Turnaround Mitty From Comeback City' "There were many who doubted me, but everyone on the Nitty-Gritty Mitty Committee knew that Turnaround Mitty from Comeback City would one day be sitting pretty."
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 00:32 |
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I love Kelly so much.
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 01:00 |
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Another blast from the past: Heroic PETA Commandos Kill 49, Save Rabbit Edit: Also see Fox Defends Airing Of When Jews Attack. ultrafilter has a new favorite as of 04:09 on Oct 9, 2012 |
# ? Oct 9, 2012 04:07 |
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Only tangentially related: my friend Jessica just starred in a commercial with Frank from the SEX HOUSE. It seems that he survived the mold after all! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=87sT6YEldZE
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 13:13 |
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Developmentally Disabled Burger King Employee Only Competent Worker
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 19:12 |
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If It's Any Consolation, Your Daughter Probably Died Almost Immediately Of Sheer Terror Holy gently caress
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 19:49 |
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Okay this one got me. I usually can laugh at the sardonic articles, but this one made me feel sad. That kid just wants to work hard! And everyone calls him names and stuff. Maybe I just have a soft spot for window lickers. Anyway, like many Onion articles, the last line is king here: Jerry Sandusky Hoping Judge Takes It Easy On Him With Sentencing
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 20:33 |
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http://www.theonion.com/articles/ask-an-elderly-black-woman-as-depicted-by-a-sophom,29855/ Holy poo poo. The onion found a time portal back to me from three years ago.
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 20:35 |
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Point/Counterpoint: Outdoor Advertising Is A Blight On Our Society vs. I Just Wanted To Tell The Nice People About The Yogurt EDIT: End-Life Crisis Marked By Extravagant Spending Spree Lysidas has a new favorite as of 21:38 on Oct 9, 2012 |
# ? Oct 9, 2012 21:12 |
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Chexoid posted:http://www.theonion.com/articles/ask-an-elderly-black-woman-as-depicted-by-a-sophom,29855/ Incredible. But I think I enjoy this one a little more.
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 21:41 |
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Chexoid posted:http://www.theonion.com/articles/ask-an-elderly-black-woman-as-depicted-by-a-sophom,29855/
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# ? Oct 9, 2012 21:48 |
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Chexoid posted:http://www.theonion.com/articles/ask-an-elderly-black-woman-as-depicted-by-a-sophom,29855/ It sort of reminds of me of the Blues Singer series Blues Singer's Woman May Allah have mercy on his two-timin' soul
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# ? Oct 10, 2012 01:47 |
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Apparently Diamond Joe Biden is going to be "live-tweeting" during his debate with Paul Ryan Onion's Facebook posted:Thursday at 8pm EDT/7pm CDT, Vice President Joe Biden will be taking over @OnionPolitics and will live-tweet his debate with Paul Ryan. This is going to rule.
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# ? Oct 10, 2012 02:01 |
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Jerusalem posted:Apparently Diamond Joe Biden is going to be "live-tweeting" during his debate with Paul Ryan This is me in real life right now: Also, oh god: http://www.theonion.com/articles/nation-did-not-see-mark-wahlbergs-sex-change-comin,29857/ And an all-time favorite, which may come true at some point: http://www.theonion.com/articles/supreme-court-upholds-bill-of-rights-in-54-decisio,6453/ BrooklynBruiser has a new favorite as of 03:13 on Oct 10, 2012 |
# ? Oct 10, 2012 03:10 |
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Naked, Tied-Up Paul Ryan Tells Staff He Can’t Prepare For Debate Unless They Slap Him Harder
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 02:51 |
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Volume posted:Naked, Tied-Up Paul Ryan Tells Staff He Can’t Prepare For Debate Unless They Slap Him Harder The amazing things they did with the Diamond Joe Biden persona make me hope they continue profiling Ryan in this vein. I'm not sure where they could take it from here, though. That article is pretty thorough.
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 06:04 |
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Ishamael posted:Only tangentially related: my friend Jessica just starred in a commercial with Frank from the SEX HOUSE. It seems that he survived the mold after all! Homeowner!
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 07:36 |
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Volume posted:Naked, Tied-Up Paul Ryan Tells Staff He Can’t Prepare For Debate Unless They Slap Him Harder Wow. That sure is an article. To contribute, anything with the Supreme Court is pure gold.
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 08:23 |
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Insurance Company Celebrates 50 Billionth loving Over Of Customer
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 20:44 |
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Best one
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 23:44 |
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They Can Never Take Away My Memories
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# ? Oct 11, 2012 23:46 |
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Just a reminder... Onion Politics @OnionPolitics In under an hour, Vice President @JoeBiden will be taking over @OnionPolitics and will live-tweet his debate with Paul Ryan. https://twitter.com/OnionPolitics
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# ? Oct 12, 2012 00:13 |
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# ? May 19, 2024 15:08 |
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Man, I read that till the end hoping there would be an "...until I turn senile. Oh poo poo." at the end.
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# ? Oct 12, 2012 00:28 |