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Security Removes Biden's Rowdy Buddies From Auditorium
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Oct 12, 2012 02:50
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Bill Gates Grants Self 18 Dexterity, 20 Charisma
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Oct 12, 2012 03:21
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Eloquent Biden Brings Entire Audience To Tears In Debate Stunner
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Oct 12, 2012 03:38
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Holy gently caress that article is 15 years old. 
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Oct 12, 2012 04:10
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You really have to follow that up with Biden Shares 20-Minute Post-Debate Kiss With Janna Ryan to get the full effect. SynthOrange posted:Holy gently caress that article is 15 years old. Yeah. I realized the other day that I've been reading The Onion for sixteen years now....
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Oct 12, 2012 04:23
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King Hippo's New Boxing Gym Allows 8-Bit Teenagers To Get Off Pixelated Streets Every sentence is gold. Everything from gangs on conveyor belts to the flash in the crowd.
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Oct 12, 2012 18:11
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Mr. Autumn Man Walking Down Street With Cup Of Coffee, Wearing Sweater Over Plaid Collared Shirt
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Oct 12, 2012 19:02
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Airconswitch posted:If It's Any Consolation, Your Daughter Probably Died Almost Immediately Of Sheer Terror Why the gently caress did they write this. I really wish I hadn't read it.
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Oct 12, 2012 21:40
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Holy gently caress
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http://www.theonion.com/articles/josh-hamilton-relieved-he-made-it-through-entire-s,29894/ These are horrible, horrible people. Edit: VV Agreed, that was disturbing. AFewBricksShy has a new favorite as of 22:38 on Oct 12, 2012 |
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Oct 12, 2012 22:19
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AFewBricksShy posted:http://www.theonion.com/articles/josh-hamilton-relieved-he-made-it-through-entire-s,29894/ That's not the same as writing that little torture fantasy. If that was posted anywhere but this thread, the writers would be crucified edit: I am aware of the irony
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Oct 12, 2012 22:33
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Nancy Pelosi being one of his drunken buddies is the icing on the cake.
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Oct 13, 2012 00:22
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Bhodi posted:King Hippo's New Boxing Gym Allows 8-Bit Teenagers To Get Off Pixelated Streets Edit: The Onion writers really have a soft spot for Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!! New Mike Tyson Documentary Features Exclusive Interviews With Super Macho Man, King Hippo get that OUT of my face has a new favorite as of 03:44 on Oct 13, 2012 |
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Oct 13, 2012 03:24
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It doesn't seem like the forums search can be restricted to a single subforum at the moment, so I'm not sure if these have been posted (recently): Monster At End Of Book Claims Life Of TV's Grover Well, I Guess That Genocide In Sudan Must've Worked Itself Out On Its Own National Gonzo Press Club Vows To Carry On Thompson's Work
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Oct 14, 2012 17:19
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Arlen Specter Switches Affiliation From Alive To Dead At Last Minute
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Oct 15, 2012 22:25
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Obama Excited To Participate In First Debate. In my mind, they can't put his feet to the coals enough for that disaster of a performance. Speaking of the election, they have another swing state video up, this time focusing on Florida. It's not exactly new ground for them, but it has a few chuckles in it. I dub this one "The Story of Goons".
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Oct 16, 2012 17:17
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Robert Denby posted:I dub this one "The Story of Goons". I used to work with a guy like that. I also wanted to punch him in his smug face. I was going to post the Ask An Elderly Black Woman as Depicted by a Sophomore Creative Writing Major from last page, because I had never seen that part of the site before. I loved Ask a 1920's Baseball Fan for the nearly impenetrable slang.
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Oct 16, 2012 20:17
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Sony Releases Stupid Piece of poo poo that Doesn't loving Work I always get a good laugh out of that one, Gay Marine Beaten to Bloody Pulp to Fire Up RNC Crowd has become a recent favorite also
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Oct 16, 2012 20:38
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Ouch. America Ends Love Affair With McKayla Maroney After Finding Out She's 16
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Oct 17, 2012 01:34
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Nation's Ever So Malleable Simpletons Fluttering Between Candidates Like Shuttlecocks Through Every Moment Of Debate Edit: Also, Romney To Town Hall Audience: 'I Own Horses And Care For Them, And You Are All Like Horses' Zugzwang has a new favorite as of 02:34 on Oct 17, 2012 |
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Oct 17, 2012 02:28
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Senate Ethics Committee To Meet In New Ethics Committee MansionThe Onion posted:The thorny question of lobbyist gift-giving is posed in the Evidence Wing, where lobbyists have voluntarily come forward with hundreds of millions of dollars in ethics-violation-related evidence, including ermine coats, Aston Martin sports cars, and attaché cases filled with cash. And as always, the final line is masterful.
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Oct 17, 2012 04:55
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This is probably unposted: Study: Dolphins Not So Intelligent On Land Probably.
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Oct 17, 2012 05:10
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So The Onion decided to finally parody TED Talks. As much as I like TED Talks, some of them are pretty much exactly this. E: Also, whoa. Mura has a new favorite as of 18:29 on Oct 17, 2012 |
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Oct 17, 2012 18:27
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Horrible Boogie Boarding Accident Leaves Man Totally Bummed Below The Neck Every line of this article is gold, especially the last line.
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Oct 17, 2012 19:50
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Tearful Mitt Romney Announces He Has Rare Disease Where You Can't Sit Quietly On Stool When Repeatedly Asked To
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Oct 17, 2012 19:51
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Debate Gives ESPN Executive Awesome Idea For Show In Which White Guy, Black Guy Ignore Timers And Yell At Each Other
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Oct 18, 2012 14:19
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Romney's Google Search History Leaked "I demand computer feel pain I hate you computer"
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Oct 19, 2012 02:51
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"how to beat the onyx man"
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Oct 19, 2012 04:35
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Better hope you picked Squirtle or Bulbasaur
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Oct 19, 2012 05:29
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Biden knows better than to search without incognito on.
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Oct 19, 2012 05:43
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I demand scrolls of power OPPOSITE OF DOCTOR WHAT IS CHINA? Dr. Arbitrary has a new favorite as of 06:17 on Oct 19, 2012 |
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Oct 19, 2012 06:12
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Horse liver price per cubic foot I demand typical human blinking frequency range
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Oct 19, 2012 13:37
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A man giving up on life (1080p)
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Oct 19, 2012 13:44
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Holocaust bloopers.
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Oct 19, 2012 15:59
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The Onion Endorses John Edwards For President http://www.theonion.com/articles/th...eadline:default
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Oct 19, 2012 19:41
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Continuing the trend of bleak as hell articles, here's Paramedics Rush to Revive God Following Latest Suicide Attempt http://www.theonion.com/articles/paramedics-rush-to-revive-god-following-latest-sui,29990/
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Oct 19, 2012 21:21
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From the daily newsfeed (no story): Lowered Dating Standards Disguised As Maturity
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Oct 19, 2012 21:24
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ultrafilter posted:From the daily newsfeed (no story): Lowered Dating Standards Disguised As Maturity That one really got to me. Isn't lowering your dating standards (stopping being an entitled rear end in a top hat who wants to date an unrealistically complementary partner) a real sign of maturity? UnfurledSails has a new favorite as of 21:58 on Oct 19, 2012 |
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Oct 19, 2012 21:29
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'You Will Die Someday And It Will Be Sad,' All Man Thinking During Dinner With Parents Yeaaahhh.
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Oct 19, 2012 21:37
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UnfurledSails posted:That one really got to me. Isn't lowering your dating standards (stopping being an entitled rear end in a top hat who wants to date an unrealistically complimentary partner) a real sign of maturity? There's a big difference between maturity and desperation.
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Oct 19, 2012 21:41
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SpiderHyphenMan posted:Romney's Google Search History Leaked Can I just say I've watched this twice and have cried laughing, thank you so much for sharing. The tweets below are just incredible.
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Oct 19, 2012 21:52
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