BBM Super-League XXIX: The World Ends With Yu Darvish

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«‹›1996 »

cbx: Dec 4, 2007; Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.

Cthulhu Dreams posted:

Not easily sorry, just turn the screen res down for the duration

I can't really do that with this monitor, I'll end up with a noticeable drop in readability as far as the game is concerned. I'll try using FRAPS for my screenshots so I can get them to Goog asap.

EC Update!

As I'm currently simulating the first month of the EC, I figured I would give you guys some insights as to how injuries are handled.

-During the month of simulation, I check every team each day for injuries and note the player and extent of injury.

-If a player is injured less than or equal to 5 days, his injury is erased. Players play through minor sprains and mild concussions all the time in reality, no need to coddle these precious pieces of data.

-If a player is injured more than 6 days, I write down which players got injured, then I delete the injury UNTIL the next month of play. At that point, I post the results, so that you owners can figure out what to do for backups and trades. I will not begin the next month UNTIL all major injuries have been dealt with OR 2 real days pass. At that point, if an owner has not given me their injury contingency plans, I will replace as I see fit and continue the sim. I will not attempt to trade any play from any team under any circumstance, I will simply use the roster available to me to make the best decision for the welfare of the team.

-Note: This way of handling injuries is ONLY for the Expansion Cup. Smasher does things differently as he only simulates a week at a time, and this allows owners to have more of a hands-on approach with managing their teams.

# ? Oct 24, 2012 22:42

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# ? May 11, 2024 07:49

Cthulhu Dreams: Dec 11, 2010; If I pretend to be Cthulhu no one will know I'm a baseball robot.

It does not make a difference for screenshot readability - try it

# ? Oct 24, 2012 23:05

Smasher Dynamo: Oct 16, 2008; ~~Eternal~~ Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

Super-League VII, Smasher League Week 15: Commonwealth Clash

Tonight, as a special presentation, I will be bringing you all three games from the epic Eazy W's-Cultists Television Championship Series.

Games of the Week

Don May posted:

W'S EDGE CULTISTS 2-1 TO TAKE FIRST BLOOD

Dunwich- The Cultists were hoping to end the W's title aspirations early, as well as make a statement. They could do neither.

Instead, the W's were able to take the first game of the series thanks to a sterling performance by Cy Young, who allowed just one run over seven innings, which was just enough to give the W's the win.

This infuriated Cultists' owner CthulhuDreams, who saw his batters look completely helpless today, "This was unacceptable. We should have won this game. We should be winning every game. I've checked the numbers, we have the better team, our players are better at eight of nine starting positions. This is an outrage! Regardless of today's anomalous result, however, the Eazy W's will still need to beat us twice more in a row in order to take the Television Title from us. As tomorrow will match Jack McDowell, who had but three good seasons in a disappointing career, against Walter Johnson, generally considered the greatest pitcher to have ever lived, there is almost no statistical chance that the W's will win that game, let alone win a potential Game 3. Today's loss was frustrating, but it will prove to mean nothing."

St. Mark Bellhorn, currently on the disabled list due to injuries sustained in a thrilling duel with Bobbleheads' newcomer Josh Hamilton, disagreed, "Ryleh Cultists, judgment has come at last to Dunwich. For fifteen weeks and an Expansion Cup, we have all had to endure your derision, your condescension, your utter certainty that you know better than every owner that has come before you. That you alone have solved the Super-League, and know the secret of how to defeat the invincible Macho Men. That you are so much smarter than the rest of us that you know these things in your first season as an owner. You are so very wrong, CthulhuDreams.

"It has been no secret that I and ForeverBWFC disagreed with his decision to assemble the Legacy. When the five of us are united, the results can be...unpredictable. But when our opponent reduces our beloved game into nothing but spreadsheets and equations, then the chaos that the Legacy will wreak is the most perfect antidote. When you look at Jack McDowell, CthulhuDreams, the only story you recognize is the story his numbers tell. But there is so much more, CthulhuDreams, and our team will not let you remain blind to it any longer. Judgment has arrived, CthulhuDreams, and justice will finally have its day."

Jack McDowell, the Game 2 starter, was more relaxed, "You know, I've got a good feeling about tomorrow. A really good feeling."

Box Score

Don May posted:

W'S WIN AGAIN 8-4, JUST ONE GAME AWAY FROM SWEEP

Dunwich- A good feeling indeed.

The Eazy W's slammed Walter Johnson for six runs in the top of the second inning and never looked back. By the eighth inning, with the W's up 8-3, McDowell decided to take things to the next level, walking out to the mound with his now-trademark microphone in hand. "Ladies and Gentlemen, my name is Jack McDowell, and I still represent the legacy. You know, we've had a lot of fun today. The W's are up big, the Big Train has been derailed, really, just awesome. But I feel like we're missing something, that final piece that would turn this victory into something a bit more meaningful. You see, we came here to win, obviously, but, more importantly, we came here to send the Cultists and important message about what makes a team great. Our position, of course, being that there are some components of greatness that defy easy quantification." McDowell then paused.

"You know, I'm rambling a bit. Okay, here's what we're going to do. I am going to call the bullpen and bring out the worst reliever that we have, you know her, it's Yoshida. She throws knuckleballs, and has a 60 mph fastball. The Cultists have that great lineup, right? They should tear her apart, and maybe even mount a real comeback in this game. It's definitely the best chance they could get. I am giving the Cultists the perfect opportunity to save their game, save their title, save their narrowminded view of baseball where numbers are all that matters, I am giving it all to them on a silver platter. But, just between me and the 43,500 fans in attendance, it's not going to work. Yoshida is going to come into the game, and she won't be perfect. She'll give up a run or two, but that's all, the Cultists aren't going to come back in this game, they aren't going to win tomorrow. This isn't going to work. Some things are just more powerful than statistics, things like us. Okay, enough chatting, Yoshida! Let's make this happen!"

Eri Yoshida, the diminutive right-hander, then entered the game, and McDowell's prediction came all too true. Ivan Rodriguez did manage a home run in the bottom of the ninth, but that did little to cushion the Cultists' 8-4 defeat. CthulhuDreams, shocked by what has happened to his team over the first two games of this series, was searching for answers, "No, this isn't right. This isn't right at all! McDowell had no better than a 15% chance of winning the game, and, even when Yoshida entered the game, the chances of us scoring only one run in two innings against her was only 23%! No, this isn't right! This can't be happening! This isn't over yet! Steve Carlton has been performing significantly better than [Eazy W's Game 3 Starter] Koufax this season! We should still be favored to win that game. We will win that game. I will not let you humiliate us like this! We're better than that, we're better than all of you, and tomorrow, we'll prove it!"

Box Score

Don May posted:

CULTISTS LOSE TELEVISION TITLE ON 4-2 DEFEAT

Dunwich- There was a lot of anger in the air during the game.

The W's were angry because they saw the Cultists as lacking respect for the traditions and institutions of the Super-League. The Cultists were angry because of how the first two games of this series had gone. Only one would get the vindication they craved.

In the end, Koufax won the duel of power lefties against Carlton and gave the Eazy W's their first Television Championship, ending the Cultists' fourteen week reign. This was cause for celebration from W's owner BWFC, "Going into this season, it appeared as though our best days were behind us, but I knew that if I just made enough seemingly insane trade, that there was a good chance that I would somehow luck into the right one. And that is what has happened here. Sure, trading Lou Gehrig for Cy Young and Don Drysdale for Jack McDowell, but it's all worked out. This is South Bolton, numbers don't mean anything here."

CthulhuDreams was livid, "drat it all! How is this fair! I demand a rematch! What do you mean we don't play the W's again this year? Who designed this schedule? This isn't fair at all! I want my title back, do you hear me, Smasher, I want my title back!"

Box Score

NUMBERS!

Let's have some fun. In one of Bill James' books, he discusses a mathematical test that can determine how dead a team is in terms of winning a playoff race. The formula is that a team is virtually eliminated is the number of games they are behind, squared, is greater than four times the number of total games remaining.

Now, is this 100% accurate? Theoretically not, but no team has ever come back to win their division after being eliminated with this formula.

Analysis

If only Josh Hamilton would draw a walk, he'd be even better.

Analysis

The Thornton Lee is getting pummeled recently. That does not augur well for your team. At least Dihigo is healthy again.

Elimination Test

16.5 games back, squared: 272.25
73 games left, times four: 292

6.8% Life Remaining!

Analysis

Slowly, slowly, slowly digging themselves out of the wreckage. I don't think Cliff Lee is going to work out for you.

Elimination Test

17 games back, squared: 289
71 games left, times four: 284

0.0% Life Remaining!

Analysis

Mark Bellhorn Winner by default!

Analysis

Bender and Bender are the only things keeping you afloat.

I also just realized that I should have named the other Bender 'Flexo'. drat.

Elimination Test

7.5 Games Back, Squared: 56.25
72 Games Left, Time Four: 288

81.5% Life Remaining!

Analysis

Doing good on home runs. Not so good on everything else, though.

Elimination Test

24 Games Back, Squared: 576
72 Games Left, Time Four: 288

0.0% Life Remaining!

Analysis

Quad-Foxx would be great if Foxx weren't a lovely defender at every position.

Elimination Test

4 Games Back, Squared: 16
71 Games Left, Time Four: 284

94.4% Life Remaining!

Analysis

Still doing well, and now you get another chance to take games directly from the Bobbleheads.

Elimination Test

6.5 Games Back, Squared: 42.25
73 Games Left, Time Four: 292

85.6% Life Remaining!

Analysis

I'm not sure what's wrong with Ryan Braun, but putting him at 3B certainly isn't helping.

Elimination Test

24.5 Games Back, Squared: 600.25
73 Games Left, Times Four: 292

0.0% Life Remaining

Analysis

Yeah, Ken Griffey is washed up.

Elimination Test

7.5 Games Back, Squared: 56.25
72 Games Left, Time Four: 288

81.5% Life Remaining!

Analysis

Not a great week, although you did get two of three from the Bobbleheads and you were resting players.

Elimination Test

12 Games Back, Squared: 144
72 Games Left, Time Four: 288

50.0% Life Remaining!

Analysis

How could it have gone so wrong? A.J. Burnett is starting for you, that should tell you all you need to know about what killed the Superstars.

Elimination Test

19.5 Games Back, Squared: 380.25
71 Games Left, Time Four: 284

0.0% Life Remaining!

Analysis

Clearly, the Cultists are now completely doomed.

Analysis

Party time in South Bolton! Hard Ciders for everyone! Because apparently that's what they drink in Britain!

Analysis

The Ted Sox were lucky earlier in the season, and now it's starting to even itself out...hard.

Elimination Test

11 Games Back, Squared: 121
73 Games Left, Times Four: 292

58.6% Life Remaining!

Analysis

I think the second Rance-era put the final nail in the Goose Egg's coffin. And then set the coffin on fire. And then detonated an atomic bomb under the coffin. And then released a swarm of mutated half-wolf, half-scorpions on the coffin.

Elimination Test

22.0 Games Back, Squared: 484
73 Games Left, Times Four: 292

0.0% Life Remaining!

Standings and Leaders

# ? Oct 24, 2012 23:22

The Goog: Aug 6, 2007; It's a Goog Day, yes it is!

The Superstars will send down 2009 Chris Carpenter to recall 1998 David Cone.

The Mooglies will bench Hafner, DeRosa and Averill, and replace them with Bagwell, Ripken and Sizemore, respectively.

The Goog will pour himself a very large drink and wonder where his life went wrong.

# ? Oct 24, 2012 23:32

CVE: Jan 27, 2012

Dihigo starts as the 3rd pitcher again. Halladay move up to the second starting pitcher position and THE Thornton Lee pitches fourth. Josh Johnson rests in the minors for now.

# ? Oct 24, 2012 23:41

Revenant Threshold: Jan 1, 2008

Klein back in at RF, Morgan back in at 2B, fingers crossed. Quite pleased with Babe Adams there; presumably he'd be putting up some even better numbers if my infield defense was as good as my outfield. Though it says something about my pitching in general that a just-sub-3.00 ERA is a good thing.

# ? Oct 24, 2012 23:44

tatankatonk: Nov 4, 2011; Pitching is the art of instilling fear.

Hey theacox, pop into the IRC when you get a chance, I'd like to talk.

# ? Oct 24, 2012 23:51

cbx: Dec 4, 2007; Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.

Expansion Cup Update!

Injuries:

Jimmy Key - Norfolk Splinter Cells - 17 days
Jarrod Saltalamacchia - Philadelphia Failures - 31 days
Todd Worrell - Philadelphia Failures - 16 days
Scott Sanderson - Florida Dickshots - 15 days
Cal Ripken - Norfolk Splinter Cells - 6 days
James Shields - Venice Beach Surf - 244 days (Season ending)
Kevin Appier - Seattle Suicides - 28 days
Jim Konstanty - Cuba Smokers - 6 days
Marty O'Toole - Providence Barons - 6 days
Syl Johnson - Oneida Spooners - 7 days
Carl Crawford - Philadelphia Failures - 97 days
Clay Carroll - San Juan Elephants - 8 days
Brooks Robinson - Web 2.0 Bloggers BETA - 8 days
Denny Neagle - Albany Pessimists - 51 days
John McGraw - Cancun Tornados - 178 (Season ending)
Scott McGregor - Florida Dickshots - 15 days
Kenny Rogers - Seattle Suicides - 7 days
Livan Hernandez - Spokane Air Raids - 8 days
Paul O'Neill - Hartford Whalers - 17 days
King Cole - Catalina 2 Fish 1 Bubble - 9 days
Tyler Clippard - Cleveland Commies - 35 days
Rich Aurilia - Spokane Air Raids - 8 days
Mike Torrez - Providence Barons - 12 days
Mike Boddicker - Florida Dickshots - 28 days
Felix Hernandez - New Orleans Mashers - 17 days
Steve Busby - Oneida Spooners - 136 days (Season ending)

# ? Oct 24, 2012 23:55

Pete Ladd: Mar 9, 2012

Mornacale posted:

The list of (sometimes semi-)notable SPs who I can part with easily is: '64 Steve Barber, , '68 Jim Rooker, '90 Scott Erickson, and of course '04 Oliver Perez. Then of course there are the guys on my current roster, who are obviously a little dearer (well, except the two that are just random shots in the dark). But I would definitely listen.

I feel compelled to give a Pirates fan even a flicker of joy, plus two Barrys Bonds will be awesome to see, even if it's too late for me.

'64 Robin Roberts, '90 Kevin Tapani, and '68 Norm Cash? Robin Roberts is basically a deadballer by his time in Balmer, Tapani isn't awful, and I could use another bench bat, so I can put the corpse of Bill Dickey to rest.

Currently active teams, my apologies, but betting on injured guys to carry you through the Gauntlet or next season is probably a losing proposition.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 00:19

Smasher Dynamo: Oct 16, 2008; ~~Eternal~~ Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

NotThatSamBeckett posted:

I feel compelled to give a Pirates fan even a flicker of joy, plus two Barrys Bonds will be awesome to see, even if it's too late for me.

'64 Robin Roberts, '90 Kevin Tapani, and '68 Norm Cash? Robin Roberts is basically a deadballer by his time in Balmer, Tapani isn't awful, and I could use another bench bat, so I can put the corpse of Bill Dickey to rest.

Currently active teams, my apologies, but betting on injured guys to carry you through the Gauntlet or next season is probably a losing proposition.

Are you sure you want to make that trade (Hint: You do not want to make that rade).

# ? Oct 25, 2012 00:30

ForeverBWFC: Oct 19, 2011; Oh, the lads! You should've seen 'em running!
Ask 'em why and they reply the Bolton Boys are coming! All the lads and lasses, smiles upon their faces,

WALKING DOWN THE MANNY ROAD, TO SEE THE BURNDEN ACES!

When this season is over, this will make one hell of a film! Rest Snider for Moseby this week and, since Bellhorn is injured and I have no back-up 3rd baseman, Rolen will have to grin and bare it. Move Dave Smith in for Stan Williams. Are any of my rotation in need of a rest Smasher?

Owners! Apparently I need a bench infielder, and I have talent on my bench on offer. Nothing fancy, let's just get poo poo done.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 00:36

Armitage: Aug 16, 2005; "Mathman's not here." "Oh? Where is he?" "He's in the Mathroom."

Wasn't just Rance, man. We never got off to any sort of start hitting wise. If guys like Ken Williams, Indian Bob Johnson, and Robinson Cano would have hit, well.. maybe the only difference would be our position in the standings. I will concede that maybe those three guys are probably only average to below average hitters in the Super League.

Anyway, I'm gonna get relegated a third time. This cannot be avoided. However, I do not see the need to be a Mopey Mike about things. I want to go out in a blaze of glory somehow, and I want my obit to be even better than what that CYOA was supposed to be!

Guys.

I want your Bob Welches. I want to form Welchtron, Defender of Whatever. There are apparently four Welches out there, so I don't know who will form the head. Whatever, I want them somehow! If factorialite can try to collect all the Jimmie Foxxes, I want to collect all the Bob Welches!

# ? Oct 25, 2012 00:47

Pungry: Feb 26, 2011; JUST PICK ONE. ANY ONE.

Well, Nate Robertson, I guess it's your chance to shine!

New Pitching Order (until Rogers comes back)

1. Carl Mays
2. Bullet Joe Bush
3. Justin Verlander
4. Nate Robertson
5. uh Sad Sam Jones for one start I guess?

Then when Rogers comes back, move Robertson to the fifth spot, put Rogers back into the fourth spot, and get Sad Sam Jones back in the bullpen.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 00:49

Shadow gamer: Jul 24, 2008; I PASSED UP A BARGAIN

cbx posted:

Expansion Cup Update!

Injuries:

Jim Konstanty - Cuba Smokers - 6 days

Can I just rest Konstanty? I mean it's only 6 days for a set-up man.Ideally I should even have to use him that much. If that's no good I guess move Howell to setup.

Shadow gamer fucked around with this message at 00:57 on Oct 25, 2012

# ? Oct 25, 2012 00:54

cbx: Dec 4, 2007; Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.

Shadow gamer posted:

Can I just rest Konstanty? I mean it's only 6 days for a set-up man.Ideally I should even have to use him that much. I that's no good I guess move Howell to setup.

You can rest him, the game will attempt to use who it thinks will be best in that position until Konstanty is healed. This way, I'm giving you advance notice so you can use your own judgment in replacing Konstanty, thereby not blaming the Mogul engine for any consequences.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 00:56

StupidSexyMothman: Aug 9, 2010

Armitage posted:

I want your Bob Welches. I want to form Welchtron, Defender of Whatever. There are apparently four Welches out there, so I don't know who will form the head. Whatever, I want them somehow! If factorialite can try to collect all the Jimmie Foxxes, I want to collect all the Bob Welches!

Make me an offer (unless the Bearers suddenly agree and Smasher agrees to more work and I lose the ensuing challenge & forfeit my Welch)

# ? Oct 25, 2012 01:04

ManifunkDestiny: Aug 2, 2005; THE ONLY THING BETTER THAN THE SEAHAWKS IS RUSSELL WILSON'S TAINT SWEAT

Seahawks #1 fan since 2014.

cbx posted:

Expansion Cup Update!

Injuries:
Livan Hernandez - Spokane Air Raids - 8 days

Demote Livan, call up CJ Wilson from the minors to take his place.... permanently :getin:

ManifunkDestiny fucked around with this message at 01:11 on Oct 25, 2012

# ? Oct 25, 2012 01:06

CraigK: Nov 4, 2008; by exmarx

fuuuuuuuuck

Put Felix on the 15-day DL, bump all the starters up a rotation spot, put Mike Hampton in at 5th starter, bring up Nelson Briles to pitch mop-up duty, and as soon as Felix's DL stint is over, put everything back the way it was

# ? Oct 25, 2012 01:09

mentholmoose: Nov 5, 2009; YKNOW THERES ONLY ONE DIRECTION I KNOW AND THATS DRIVIN STRAIGHT TO THE NET

cbx posted:

Expansion Cup Update!

Injuries:

Jarrod Saltalamacchia - Philadelphia Failures - 31 days
Todd Worrell - Philadelphia Failures - 16 days
Carl Crawford - Philadelphia Failures - 97 days

God drat it.

Well, I guess, DL Saltalamacchia, recall Jon Lester as a long reliever/spot starter. Start Bob O'Farrell in Salty's place in the lineup at C. When Salty is healthy, send Lester down and have Salty start again.

Can I just force Worrell to rest instead of anything else for now?

And for Crawford, whew... I guess, just DL Crawford, start Gilkey in his place in the lineup for now, and recall Max Flack to sit on the bench. When Crawford is healthy, put him back in the lineup and send down Flack.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 01:14

tatankatonk: Nov 4, 2011; Pitching is the art of instilling fear.

Trade Notice :siren:

Elephants receive:

'58 Jim Bunning

Goose Eggs receive:

'84 Joe Carter
'77 Dave LaRoche
'78 Luis Tiant

# ? Oct 25, 2012 01:50

Smasher Dynamo: Oct 16, 2008; ~~Eternal~~ Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

I'm going to demand an explanation from Armitage before I let this trade go through.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 01:56

Armitage: Aug 16, 2005; "Mathman's not here." "Oh? Where is he?" "He's in the Mathroom."

Talked it over, while Bunning isn't really helping me all that much being stuck on a bad team that can't hit all that well, the return might not be enough. I'll give it some extra thought. I've resigned myself to fate but I at least want to put some solid bodies in the dispersal draft!

I still want Bob Welches though! Bob Welch probably would not be much of an help for Expansion Cup teams come dispersal draft time

Armitage fucked around with this message at 02:41 on Oct 25, 2012

# ? Oct 25, 2012 02:34

Nerokerubina: Jun 7, 2007; I think swords are neat. Do you think swords are neat?!

Reggie Jackson to RF, Monday to LF, Hamilton to bench, cruz to AAA. Reshuffle those deck chairs!

# ? Oct 25, 2012 02:38

Monicro: Oct 21, 2010; And you could feel his features in the air
A wide smile and perfect hair
He had complete control of the rising tides
And a medicine bag hanging at his side

In the flowing blue world of the death-dealing physician

cbx posted:

Injuries:
Scott Sanderson - Florida Dickshots - 15 days
Scott McGregor - Florida Dickshots - 15 days
Mike Boddicker - Florida Dickshots - 28 days

half my rotation died cool

Okay, let's see here. DL Boddicker, replace his rotation spot with Ken Holtzman.

DL McGregor, replace his spot in the rotation with Joe Niekro.

Switch Neikro and Steve Rogers' spots in the rotation.

I guess DL Sanderson, but I dunno if you even have to in Mogul since he's in AAA.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 02:47

TKBomber7285: Feb 20, 2011

The Rated R Superstars have agreed to a trade with the South Bolton Easy W's.

Superstars get
Dan Plesac
Stan Williams

Easy W's get
Howard Johnson

Dan Plesac will take John Rocker's spot as setup man while Stan Williams will replace Joquiam Benoit in short relief. We will promote David Freese to take the extra roster spot from Howard Johnson's departure.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 03:05

Paul Zuvella: Dec 7, 2011

Put Paul O'Neill on the 15 day DL and put Roy White in his DH spot against righties.

Call up Jorge Posada as a bench bat.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 03:14

The Goog: Aug 6, 2007; It's a Goog Day, yes it is!

EXPANSION CUP VII - APRIL :siren:

GAMES OF THE MONTH

quote:

SPLINTER CELLS DEMONSTRATE SUPER LEAGUE SUPERIORITY; ANNIHILATE AIR RAIDS 15-0

NORFOLK -- The Norfolk Splinter Cells were invited to compete in the seventh Expansion Cup just to provide an even number of teams. To this point, they are showing the Super League's new owners that their teams have a long way to go before they can hang with the best the League has to offer.

All of the scoring in this one came in the first five innings; the Splinter Cells put up eleven runs against starter Livan Hernandez, then added four more off of Felix Rodriguez. After the fifth, the Splinter Cells seemed to call off the dogs, putting in little effort in their at bats and not scoring any more for the rest of the game.

"I had to get out of there," cbx said when asked about his team taking its foot off the gas in the final innings. "Tommy [John, who threw a complete game shutout] was cruising, we were up by a gazillion [sic], and I wanted to go home so I could sacrifice a live chicken to my Justin Verlander shrine before Game 1."

The Air Raids did not seemed stunned by the overwhelming defeat. "Well, you know, it is what it is," left fielder Barry Bonds said from his recliner in the visitors' clubhouse. "You put a piece of [expletive] like Livan [Hernandez] on the mound against a lineup of nine current, future, or should-be Hall of Famers, and the dude's gonna get his [expletive] kicked. Doesn't take a [expletive] genius to figure that out."

quote:

GROVE THROWS 150 PITCHES IN HARD-LUCK 11-0 LOSS

Lefty Grove pitched well enough to win, in that any pitching performance can theoretically be credited with a win if the circumstances are right, but the aching Tornados' offense couldn't scrape together a run, let alone the twelve it would have taken to beat the Woodchucks.

Grove scattered sixteen hits over eight innings of work, allowing just eleven runs, only ten of which were earned. "Yeah, he mixed his locations pretty well," Woodchuck second baseman Chase Utley said, chuckling. "The first home run I hit was right down the middle, and the second was just above right down the middle."

Asked why he didn't send Grove out for the ninth inning, 'Nados' manager UltimoDragonQuest said, "Well, you know, Lefty looked a little off his game in the eighth (one of just two innings in which he did not allow the Woodchucks to score), and Mike [Magnante] needed the work...maybe if he was up over seventeen, eighteen runs allowed, I'd've let him go for it, but I decided it was for the best that we save his bullets for later in the season."

quote:

SURF'S UP FOR DICKSHOTS IN 8-3 WIN

In a game that was really only notable for the headline in its writeup, the Florida Dickshots captured an 8-3 win over the Venice Beach Surf.

"Yeah, I guess it was an in-state thing," Dickshots' manager Monicro said, shrugging off a reporter's desperate attempt to inject meaning into a game between two mediocre expansion teams in the third week of April. "But honestly, I don't pay attention to where any of these teams are from. I don't think anybody does."

Steve Rogers pitched a complete game for the Dickshots, though it wasn't a particularly notable one. "Eh," he said when asked how he felt about his performance. "You know, it's great to get the team a win, and I thought I pitched alright, but there were definitely some things I could work on." Rogers shrugged, then added, "It's just another start, you know?"

The Surf scored three in the ninth, but never really threatened; their runs were really just enough to remove the shine from Rogers' performance, and in so doing suck any interesting potential out of the writeup.

quote:

ARGUMENTS TOP SMOKERS IN UNLIKELY PITCHERS' DUEL

When the starting pitchers are Jim Bouton and Mel Harder, and the lineups contain such luminaries as Ted Williams, Dave Kingman, Mickey Mantle and Chipper Jones, a score of 1-0 is probably not what most fans expected. Still, that score is what they got, and it took eleven innings to get there.

Bouton and Harder matched each other over nine shutout innings, and then Jay Howell and Bret Saberhagen pitched scoreless tenths. Howell couldn't repeat the feat in the 11th, as he surrendered a leadoff double to Ted Williams and then a two-out single to Charlie Keller that drove in what proved to be the winning run. Saberhagen shut the door in the bottom of the inning, and that was all she wrote.

The loss drops the Smokers to 5-12, obviously not the start they were looking for to their Super League campaign. The Arguments improved their record to 7-10.

NUMBERS! THERE ARE SO MANY NUMBERS! AND THEY ALL MEAN NOTHING!!! :derp:

Catalina 2 Fish 1 Bubble

Your team has 18 homers, and one man has accounted for ten of them. That's...not really great for balance.

Spokane Air Rads

The bad news is that all of your starters have been terrible. The good news is that at least three of them should be better, and you have Haren sitting in AAA.

New England Arguments

Your offense is already doing really well; if Nomar starts playing up to his talent, it will be even better.

Providence Barons

Campbell's been incredible so far. Shame that he's hoarding all the success rather than letting some of the other relievers have some.

Web 2.0 Bloggers BETA

Wait, I thought you were tanking. Did I imagine that? If you're tanking, you're not very good at it.

Cleveland Commies

I know you were warned about Buehrle possibly being in trouble, but wow. I'd give him another month before cutting him, but you at least need to be considering it now.

Florida Dickshots

Your pitching's been solid, but the offense is dreadful. It's just one month, and it's just the EC, so don't panic, but...keep an eye on it.

San Juan Elephants

Five hitters in your lineup have OBPs under .300, and that's not counting the pitcher's spot. Is it any wonder why you're under .500?

Philadelphia Failures

Seriously, dude, just trade me every 2011 Red Sox player you're not using. It will make you better. Somehow.

Flushing Flying Dutchmen

Great rotation, really good bullpen, and a handful of top-tier hitters in the lineup already. Make the right trades and draft picks, and you could be going places.

New Orleans Mashers

Jesus, your Bagwell is making me jealous. Wanna trade?

Albany Pessimists

I'm not just playing into your team name when I say that there's no way your pitchers can keep this up.

Cuba Smokers

Is Granny Hamner a real guy, or just the greatest fake Mogul player ever?

Oneida Spooners

Shame that Mogul doesn't let you bat the pitcher 8th; Morgan's OBP is kinda wasted where he is now.

Seattle Suicides

Carlos Guillen is your leadoff hitter? Really? ... No, really?

Venice Beach Surf

Normally this is the part of the program where I say "It's early, it's the EC; don't panic." In your case...maybe a little panic is necessary.

Cancun Tornados

I refuse to give you specific advice until you explain why you spelled your team name wrong.

Hartford Whalers

I don't know that I've ever seen a Super League team carry three catchers without having one of them be a fulltime DH. So you've got that going for you.

Wausau Woodchucks

I'd like to remind Smasher that I'm just posting these, and that cbx should be punished for producing this result.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 03:22

Paul Zuvella: Dec 7, 2011

Uh, why are my roster and lineups wrong? I don't even have Roy White on my team according to this, Posada is supposed to be in my farm. Quoted is the post I made for my roster in this thread.

mks5000 posted:

Could have sworn I did this already, but I can't seem to find it. Oh well.

Team Name: The Hartford Baseball Whalers

Home City: Hartford, Connecticut

Home Stadium: The Shipyard - 330x375x404x380x320

DH Preference: Yes please

25-Man Roster:
C: Thurman Munson (R) (1972)
1B: Wade Boggs (L) (1995)
2B: Dave Cash (R) (1976)
SS: Derek Jeter (R) (1995)
3B: Mike Schmidt (R) (1976)
RF: Bernie Williams (S) (1995)
CF: Garry Maddox (R) (1976)
LF: Bobby Mercer (L) (1972)
DH: Paul O'Neill (L) (1995)

C: Bob Boone (R) (1976)
1B: Don Mattingly (L) (1995)
IF: Larry Bowa (S) (1976)
OF: Greg Luzinski (R) (1976)
OF: Roy White (S) (1972)

SP1: Steve Carlton (L) (1976)
SP2: Jim Kaat (L) (1976)
SP3: David Cone (R) (1995)
SP4: Bob Gibson (R) (1972)
SP5: Andy Pettite (L) (1995)

CL: Sparky Lyle (L) (1972)
SU: John Wetteland (R) (1995)
RP: Tug McGraw (L) (1976)
RP: Gene Garber (R) (1976)
RP: Mariano Rivera (R) (1995)
SP/LR: Jim Lonborg (R) (1976)

Minors:
C: Jorge Posada (S) (1995)
SP: Mel Stottlemyre (R) (1972)
IF: Randy Velarde (R) (1995)

Lineup VS. RHP W/ DH
1. 1B Wade Boggs (L)
2. CF Garry Maddox (R)
3. LF Bobby Mercer (L)
4. RF Bernie Williams (S)
5. 3B Mike Schmidt (R)
6. DH Paul O'Neill (L)
7. SS Derek Jeter (R)
8. C Thurman Munson (R)
9. 2B Dave Cash (R)

Lineup VS. LHP W/ DH
1. CF Garry Maddox (R)
2. 1B Wade Boggs (L)
3. 3B Mike Schmidt (R)
4. LF Bobby Mercer (L)
5. RF Bernie Williams (S)
6. DH Greg Luzinski (R)
7. SS Derek Jeter (R)
8. C Thurman Munson (R)
9. 2B Dave Cash (R)

Lineup VS. RHP w/o DH
1. 1B Wade Boggs (L)
2. CF Garry Maddox (R)
3. LF Bobby Mercer (L)
4. RF Bernie Williams (S)
5. 3B Mike Schmidt (R)
6. SS Derek Jeter (R)
7. C Thurman Munson (R)
8. 2B Dave Cash (R)
9. Pitcher

Lineup VS. LHP w/o DH
1. CF Garry Maddox (R)
2. 1B Wade Boggs (L)
3. 3B Mike Schmidt (R)
4. LF Bobby Mercer (L)
5. RF Bernie Williams (S)
6. SS Derek Jeter (R)
7. C Thurman Munson (R)
8. 2B Dave Cash (R)
9. Pitcher

Starting Pitchers
SP1: Steve Carlton (L)
SP2: Jim Kaat (L)
SP3: David Cone (R)
SP4: Bob Gibson (R)
SP5: Andy Pettite (L)

Bullpen
Closer: Sparky Lyle (L)
Setup: John Wetteland (R)
Short Relief: Tug McGraw (L)
Short Relief: Mariano Rivera (R)
Middle Relief: Gene Garber (R)
Long Relief/SP6: Jim Lonborg (R)

Strategy (Rate on a scale from -5 to +5)

Hit and Run: -2
Sacrifice Bunt: -2
Squeeze Play: -5
Trying for extra bases:-1
Stealing Bases: 0
Aggressively Tagging Up: 1
Pitch Outs (to prevent stolen bases): 3
Giving Intentional Walks: 0
Pitching Around Good Hitters: 3
Bringing the Infield In: 3
Guarding the Lines: 0
Making Cutoff Throws: -1
Bringing in Pinch Hitters: 3
Bringing in Pinch Runners: 0
Bringing in Defensive Replacements: 0
Starting Pitchers on Short Rest: 0
Letting pitchers pitch throw trouble: 1
Letting Pitchers rack up high pitch counts: 0

# ? Oct 25, 2012 03:32

tatankatonk: Nov 4, 2011; Pitching is the art of instilling fear.

Well, that's disappointing, but hopefully when my lineups and rotation are fixed, we'll start performing better.

Here's the lineup:
#1 Ichiro Suzuki - RF
#2 Rogers Hornsby - 3B
#3 Joe Torre - C
#4 Hank Aaron - LF
#5 Julio Franco - SS
#6 Steve Garvey - 1B
#7 Brett Butler - CF
#8 Davey Lopes - 2B
Pitcher

Rotation:
#1 Bert Blyleven
#2 Don Sutton
#3 Andy Messersmith
#4 Pedro Martinez
#5 Luis Tiant

CL Eckersley
SU Mike Marshall
SR Larry Andersen
SR Jim Kern
MR Clay Carroll
MR Ron Reed
LR Charlie Hough

# ? Oct 25, 2012 03:35

Smasher Dynamo: Oct 16, 2008; ~~Eternal~~ Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

Don't worry, expansion owners, we're working out the kinks on the lineups in the first Expansion Cup updates.

I think the issue is that someone picked the wrong screenshots to grab, but, as far as I know, the games for the first month were played with the correct lineups.

Smasher Dynamo fucked around with this message at 03:48 on Oct 25, 2012

# ? Oct 25, 2012 03:41

IceMole: Aug 1, 2009

Postmodernists! Since you want more uninjured starting pitching, the Unicorns offer 2007 Derek Lowe and 2007 Brad Penny for your half-dead Barrold Bonds.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 03:51

Monicro: Oct 21, 2010; And you could feel his features in the air
A wide smile and perfect hair
He had complete control of the rising tides
And a medicine bag hanging at his side

In the flowing blue world of the death-dealing physician

Hahaha my DH didn't get a hit all month

# ? Oct 25, 2012 04:03

cbx: Dec 4, 2007; Smasher Dynamo's assistant of the Super-League.

mks5000 posted:

Uh, why are my roster and lineups wrong? I don't even have Roy White on my team according to this, Posada is supposed to be in my farm. Quoted is the post I made for my roster in this thread.

I'm not sure why your roster isn't correct, I double-checked the sheet I used to enter all the rosters and the post you quoted is the post I entered your team from. Lemme check the roster file itself, maybe it didn't recognize Roy White for some reason. I'll have it fixed before midnight.

e: Fixed. White was indeed corrupted and was on the Free Agents list instead of on your roster. It's all been fixed.

cbx fucked around with this message at 04:46 on Oct 25, 2012

# ? Oct 25, 2012 04:05

Pete Ladd: Mar 9, 2012

IceMole posted:

Postmodernists! Since you want more uninjured starting pitching, the Unicorns offer 2007 Derek Lowe and 2007 Brad Penny for your half-dead Barrold Bonds.

See, Smasher, I know Barry Bonds is worth a lot, but that requires people to offer me deals that don't include Bad Penny. Robin Roberts was good once, at least, and my park might make him "not bad."

No one in the Expansion is likely to trade me their best pitching, because, as per everyone but Rockford, they all feel short in the rotation.

I suppose I could just suck it up with what I've got and push him into the Super-Draft for some lucky team.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 04:59

Faustoan Bargain: Dec 24, 2009; I'd sell my soul for a pitcher with a power sinker...

Thanks to injury, Tyler Clippard to DL
Gavin Floyd up from AAA to work in middle relief

Thanks to crappiness, Buehrle to long relief
Jake Peavy to rotation
BJ Ryan to setup

Thanks to some unexpected offensive performances, also revising lineups. This is called "being proactive," not "completely overreacting to one month." :colbert:

vs RHP
1. Bryce Harper CF
2. Alexei Ramirez SS
3. Paul Konerko 1B
4. Roberto Clemente RF
5. Ryan Zimmerman 3B
6. Willie Stargell LF
7. Melvin Mora DH
8. Javy Lopez C
9. Brian Roberts 2B

vs LHP
1. Alexei Ramirez 2B
2. Jayson Werth CF
3. Paul Konerko 1B
4. Roberto Clemente RF
5. Ryan Zimmerman 3B
6. Melvin Mora DH
7. Mike Morse LF
8. Miguel Tejada SS
9. Javy Lopez C

Please continue having Pagliaroni catch Strasburg and Veale. (Want to see what I have there, but so far trust Javy's bat more despite the bad April... might as well have him catch the best two starters.)

# ? Oct 25, 2012 05:15

BearDrivingTruck: Oct 15, 2011; You see the most shocking sights sometimes

Move 1934 Freddie Fitzsimmons to the starting rotation. Move Denny Neagle to the DL.

Alea Iacta Est, so to speak.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 05:33

Smasher Dynamo: Oct 16, 2008; ~~Eternal~~ Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

NotThatSamBeckett posted:

See, Smasher, I know Barry Bonds is worth a lot, but that requires people to offer me deals that don't include Bad Penny. Robin Roberts was good once, at least, and my park might make him "not bad."

No one in the Expansion is likely to trade me their best pitching, because, as per everyone but Rockford, they all feel short in the rotation.

I suppose I could just suck it up with what I've got and push him into the Super-Draft for some lucky team.

'64 Roberts is 37 and about ten years removed from his prime. Yeah, he had a decent season in '64, but that was in an era and a park that couldn't have been more conducive to his style of pitching. He is not going to do you much good. The '59 version of Roberts, that the old Framingham Fillies used for a few seasons, was spotty at best, and he was five years younger than the version your talking about.

Kevin Tapani sucks. Badly. Believe me, I'm a Cubs fan, I've seen him pitch, he is not a man you want in your rotation in real life let alone the Super-League. He's not going to help your team.

And you've got it wrong. This is a seller's market. There are loads and loads of good starters out there. There's many, many fewer hitters of Bonds' quality. You have the power here, not the Expansion owners.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 05:42

gardenald: Jul 23, 2007; In the end, it comes down to throwing one pitch after another, and seeing what happens. With each new consequence, the game begins to take shape.

cbx posted:

Expansion Cup Update!

Injuries:
Marty O'Toole - Providence Barons - 6 days
Mike Torrez - Providence Barons - 12 days

If I had more precise control, I'd say move those dudes to the bench to recover, but since we're doing a month at a time, we'll just have to see who the game decides should start in their places. Also I'm giving Camnitz another month to see if he can not be terrible.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 06:35

UltimoDragonQuest: Oct 5, 2011

The Goog posted:

Cancun Tornados

I refuse to give you specific advice until you explain why you spelled your team name wrong.

Hola, Goog!

My intention was to use the Spanish where tornado rhymes with Delgado and there is no e in the plural form. I believe the letter was swiped by a masked fox.

If you still find the present name confusing, rename to Tornados de Canc�n or the Anglophone QQ.

UltimoDragonQuest fucked around with this message at 07:44 on Oct 25, 2012

# ? Oct 25, 2012 06:41

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 11, 2024 07:49

Pungry: Feb 26, 2011; JUST PICK ONE. ANY ONE.

New Lineup:
1. 2006 Placido Palanco, 2B
2. 1999 Jonny Damon, LF
3. 1999 Mike Sweeney, 1B
4. 1918 Babe Ruth, DH
5. 2006 Magglio Ordonez, RF
6. 1999 Joe Randa, 3B
7. 1999 Carlos Beltran, CF
8. 2006 Carlos Guillen, SS
9. 2006 Ivan Rodriguez, C

and I guess I should have *shudder* Chad Krueter *shudder play every once in a while to make sure Rodriguez doesn't get tired. Is there some way to make a dude play only once a week or something?

Also, I'd like Ordonez in the fifth spot, not Dye. Thought I posted it like that before.

# ? Oct 25, 2012 06:43

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