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The following contest, scheduled for the best-of-seven games, is for the Smasher League Championship of Super-League VII! Introducing first, the challenger, they are the reigning Mark Bellhorn Division Champions, they are the promise that nothing that is truly evil will remain dead for long, from Ithaca, NY, the Finger Lakes Phoenixes! The Phoenixes are probably not going to win this series. Well, 'probably' in the abstract sense, since I've already simmed the series and know who's going to win. Still, they are worse than the Bobbleheads in every phase of the game, and while they were able to defeat the Cultists, that was a case where they were inadvertently tailored to defeat one specific team, as they had dominated the Cultists in the regular season as well. Who here wants to bet that they just so happen to be perfectly aligned to take down a second 100-win team? Ithaqua Field Ithaca, NY Ithaqua Field will host Games 3, 4 and 5 of this series. And now, the defending Smasher League, Super League, Senor Goodtimes Division, Heavyweight and Television Champion, from Chicago, and living in a state of Mark Grace, these are your Chicago Bobbleheads! Wrigley Field Chicago, IL Wrigley Field will host Games 1, 2, 6 and 7 of this series. Game 1 Don May posted:
Box Score Game 2 Don May posted:
Box Score Game 3 Don May posted:
Box Score Game 4 Don May posted:
Box Score Game 5 Don May posted:
Box Score : Hey, but before I go...play the music. Updated Playoff Bracket
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 02:14 |
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# ? May 13, 2024 06:59 |
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mentholmoose posted:This is pretty hilarious. I have faith in the Packers. And Smasher, a self-professed Packers fan, doesn't.
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 02:28 |
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BrooklynBruiser posted:I have faith in the Packers. That's neat. Bruzer, I'll reserve my choice of which of your players to take until after the dispersal draft. You should draft accordingly.
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 02:36 |
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Draft Preferences! Teams I have Air Raids Smokers Barons Suicides Commies Bloggers Arguments Failures Pessimists Mashers Dickshots Whalers Woodchucks Spooners Elephants Tornados Teams I don't have Surf Flying Dutchmen Catalina Get me your draft preferences! Smasher Dynamo fucked around with this message at 19:39 on Nov 27, 2012 |
# ? Nov 27, 2012 08:19 |
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Edited.BrooklynBruiser posted:Round 1: Best SS or 3B Available
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 08:38 |
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Not for nothing, but I happen to have this Sweet Lou Boudreau and Chipper Jones hanging around! Fancy that! And I could take those picks off your hands, lest Smasher take someone valuable from you, and turn over these Bangers after the tithe of cheesehead hubris has been exacted! Re: the playoffs, I'm just glad Rollie got both his meltdowns in during the Phoenixes series. Re: Homicide: Life on the Street, surely existence of The Wire has relegated that series to the dustbin of network television? The Merry Marauder fucked around with this message at 08:48 on Nov 27, 2012 |
# ? Nov 27, 2012 08:43 |
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DRAFT PREFERENCES in order of need: Best starting Pitcher available Best 1B available Best starting Pitcher available Really, I'm not picky as long as I get another starting pitcher and a better starting option at 1B, ideally with another starter (because really, anyone I get in this is going to be better than Splitoroff)
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 08:58 |
These are just suggestions. Overrule my preference if it would be foolish not to. I'm not going to be mad if I say outfielder and you come back with Clemens who magically fell to 19. Best hitter available. Power, especially left handed. I do not want Yount or Walker. I don't need any more deadballers. 1st: Outfielder. Infielder if I can get Joe Morgan or better. 2nd: Closer. If K-Rod and above are gone keep taking hitters. 3rd: Platooning is fine. I'd rather draft someone who will give me 300 solid AB than a questionable Super-League guy.
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 10:44 |
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Draft Preferences! 1st round: best left fielder available 2nd round: best firstbaseman or corner outfielder available 3rd round: bpa
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 12:04 |
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Welcome to the Expansion Cup Series with the Bloggers securing a major upset against the Tornadoes in the orange league divisional series, the Expansion cub is now too close to call - both the Bloggers and the Barons are similar outfits with really quality hitters like Stan Musial and Barry Bonds standing behind some pretty shakey pitching staffs. Look for high scoring games, lots of long balls and pitchers getting pulled early after they get lit up by angry, angry hitters. quote:Game 1: Providence quote:Game 2: Providence - Barons lead the series 1-0 quote:Game 3: The Blawgosphere - Series tied 1-1 quote:Game 4: The Blawgosphere - Bloggers lead 2-1 quote:Game 5: The Blawgosphere - Series tied 2-2 quote:Game 6: Providence- Bloggers lead 3-2 Congratulations to the Bloggers! For a while there, I thought you couldn't do it, but you pulled it out in the end. Series MVP: Dick McAucliffe has the most game breaking hits, Barry Bonds probably did the most. Series LVP: Both sides pitching rotations. Jesus guys. Also, Lolich really did walk that many hitters. Prizes! You each get a pick of a pre 1901 player not already in the league (which excludes Kelley (not King Kelly)). The Bloggers are going to use their first pick on Old Hoss Radbourn (based on my discussion with Mornacle), so Barons: Please tell Smasher what player you want Please see my earlier post for a sample of the old timers in action - I'd strongly recommend Hall of Fame Pitcher John Clarkson if you want a pitcher. Position player wise, there are quite a few options, hop into IRC if you want to dicuss with me!
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 12:05 |
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I request, nay, demand that Mornacale give us updates on Charley Radbourn's tweets during the season.
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 12:13 |
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Smasher Dynamo posted:ToiletofSadness!
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 20:42 |
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The Web 2.0 BloggersBETA welcome their newest contributing writer and Twitter correspondant, Charley "Old Hoss" Radbourn! e: Also, cheers to the Barons for being a tough finals opponent and best wishes to them in the SuperLeague. I'd be down for another playoff series with y'all soon. Jeers to CthulhuDreams for continually harping on the Orange League Championship Series as a huge upset, when it's clear that it was an inevitable victory for the new guard. e2: Also, I'm unilaterally naming 1964 Milt Pappas as the EC Playoffs MVP. '64 Pappas went 7 innings in each of his 3 starts and brought home the win each time, allowing just 6 runs for a 2.57 RA. That mark even manages to eclipse his sparkling regular season, where he provided 207 innings of 2.69-ERA ball. Ironically, his pitching paved the way for him to be replaced as the Bloggers' best arm, but I know in the hearts of many fans he'll always be their ace. Congratulations Milt! Mornacale fucked around with this message at 22:15 on Nov 27, 2012 |
# ? Nov 27, 2012 20:48 |
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Just for curiosity's sake, Smasher, when you get around to making Hoss, can you post his stat screens in here?
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 20:50 |
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Results You might remember me saying that I didn't want the Unicorns to end up in the Gauntlet, and this is why. The Unicorns are just shredding their way through, and I can't say I really like the optics of that. Okay, so, I'm pretty sure that we'll have space for the Coburns in the next season. As for how the roster would be constructed, my suggestion was for you to use the Radbourns hitting and the Comancheros pitching, but if you have other ideas, I'd love to hear them. Well, one round down, three to go. I think that, looking back on it, you'll agree that the biggest enemy your team ever had was you, The Goog. And that is the end of the corporate teams. I'm sure you're all terribly broken up by the end of the Bearers too, despite the fact that most of you have individual teams that will be in Super-League VIII anyway. Next Time! Pick 'em: Death and/or Glory! Pick TWO! Cleveland Unicorns Cologne Emperors Florida Oranges Great Googly-Mooglies
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 22:33 |
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PICKEM Cologne and Florida. I'm going to keep voting against Cleveland
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 22:42 |
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Woodchucks Pick 'Em! Unicorns and Oranges.
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 22:59 |
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Pick 'em! Cleveland and Florida to advance! Draft Update! Round 1: I would prefer to get Roger Clemens over Pete Alexander. No reason. Round 2: Catcher: if neither Munson nor Bill Dickey are available, draft the best remaining SP, but not Whitey Ford - one of him is plenty. Round 3: Best available reliever or hitter, any position.
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 23:09 |
Pick 'em LOCK OF THE WEEK: Cleveland, Florida
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 23:35 |
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Next Gauntlet round will be sponsored by the letter C! Cleveland and Cologne will win! I have no reasoning for these choices!
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 23:36 |
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Gauntlet pick 'em: Cleveland and Florida
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 23:38 |
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Pick 'Em! Unicorns and Oranges.
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# ? Nov 27, 2012 23:42 |
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tatankatonk posted:Just for curiosity's sake, Smasher, when you get around to making Hoss, can you post his stat screens in here? All the pre-1901 players are actually in the game, just they don't have team infomation. So just add radboch01,1884 or radboch01,1885 into a leage builder roster and start a custom league.
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# ? Nov 28, 2012 00:14 |
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It's finally time. Get your act together and make me proud team. Please don't gently caress things up again and stay healthy.
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# ? Nov 28, 2012 01:27 |
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Congrats on a hell of a series, Mornacale. I hope we get a rematch in the main event. I'll get my pre-1901 player in shortly. I've got to think a bit about this. I'll probably follow in Mornacale's footsteps and take a pitcher, given how dogshit my staff was in the EC finals. Pick 'em! I'll go with Unicorns Magic and Florida e: For my Pre-1901 Player, I'm going to go with 1889 John Clarkson gardenald fucked around with this message at 02:55 on Nov 28, 2012 |
# ? Nov 28, 2012 01:57 |
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Pick 'Em: Cleveland and Florida
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# ? Nov 28, 2012 02:12 |
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VICE EGGS MODULE 6 BETA! START AT PROMPT 95! PROMPT 19 BUILD A TORCH! 'Build' is not a recognized command. Kidding, kidding, you're able to build a fine torch. Okay, now what? A. Let's get out of here! GO TO PROMPT 229 B. Burn the forest down! GO TO PROMPT 206 PROMPT 50 Keep waiting... It starts getting to you... How long have you been here? A day, a year? Are the walls moving? A. Keep waiting! GO TO PROMPT 197 B. Do something! GO TO PROMPT 147 PROMPT 69 ATTEMPT TO MAKE COFFEE ESPRESSO MELTDOWN! YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 92 RETINA SCANNER Okay, you got here your standard retina scanner, it's got the laser bit to scan your eye and, well, actually, that's about it. A. Return to the Complex! GO TO PROMPT 184 B. Look into the Retina Scanner! GO TO PROMPT 172 PROMPT 95 KHABEUM'S FORLORN HOPE The fifth treasure is Khabeum's Forlorn Hope. Of course, no one is entirely clear on what that is. A 'forlorn hope' is the first wave of soldiers sent in by a besieging army after a breach in the wall is made. Their casualties are horrendous, as you might guess, but they are necessary to form a beachead from which later waves of attacker can proceed from. Hard to figure what that means here, though. You find yourself in a pine forest. It's cool and rainy, and you've watched enough '90s Sci-fi to know that you're somewhere in British Columbia. Hell, you're pretty sure they shot like 30 episodes of Stargate SG-1. Like the one where...huh....show ran for ten years and you can't remember a single episode. Anyway, your hear a stream in the distance to your right, and some sort of light flickering in the distance to your left. Looking at the light, it looks like it might be a campfire. A. To the river! GO TO PROMPT 180 B. To the campfire! GO TO PROMPT 157 PROMPT 129 1313! WRONG! RETURN TO START PROMPT 132 TAKE IT SLOW! Cowardly, but effective. You make it down the river and eventually see a dock in the distance. You dock your boat, and tie it up, because you might need it later for some sort of exciting escape. Walking down a trail that led to the front gate of the abandoned Loonies' complex. You also see a coffee machine by the side of the road. Odd place for a coffee machine but, then again, you've seen stranger things in adventure games. Anyway, it's a Formosa Brand Coffee Machine. The slogan on the front reads, "Coffee so good, it just might kill you!" Okay, that sounds rather ominous but, hey, it might NOT kill you! A. Approach Gate! GO TO PROMPT 209 B. Attempt to make coffee! GO TO PROMPT 69 PROMPT 141 FULL SPEED AHEAD As your canoe slams into some rocks, your last thoughts are: "At least it was fun!" YOU ARE DEAD! RETURN TO START PROMPT 145 GO TO THE CLUBHOUSE All of the uniforms, still in their lockers, as if it was abandoned just yesterday and...Craig Counsell was their starting shortstop? No wonder they got abandoned. A. Examine Craig Counsell's Uniform! GO TO PROMPT 239 B. I wonder if Tony Gwynn left any chaw behind? GO TO PROMPT 200 PROMPT 146 STEALING IS WRONG! Okay, then what? A. Swim down the river! GO TO PROMPT 191 B. Wasn't there some sort of campfire? Let me check that out... GO TO PROMPT 157 PROMPT 147 Wait it out! Boring. A. Pop open the hatch on the top! GO TO PROMPT 245 B. I'll just rewire the circuit! GO TO PROMPT 159 C. Keep waiting! GO TO PROMPT 50 Prompt 157 TO THE CAMPFIRE! You arrive at a roaring campfire that warms your chilled bones. You take a moment to sit down and think about your troubles. How the hell did you end up in the Pacific Northwest anyway? Just then, you see a shadowy figure in the woods on the other side of the campfire! What now? A. Charge! GO TO PROMPT 235 B. Approach carefully. GO TO PROMPT 185 PROMPT 158 GO TO THE TOWER! Well, you go to where you think the tower used to be, at any rate, looks like it burned to the ground at some point in the past, leaving not a lot more than some charred ruins. Hey, you now what, I'm going to do you a solid. You've been working hard, and this module is long enough as it is...in fact, it's so long that I'm starting to get worried it won't fit in one post, and that's a problem. Oh, what, I'm ruining your immersion? Listen man, I don't get paid for this, okay? At Prompt 92 add "C. Deux Ex Retina Scanner! GO TO PROMPT 260" RETURN TO PROMPT 184 PROMPT 159 REWIRE THE CIRCUIT Shockingly bad idea. YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 172 LOOK INTO THE RETINA SCANNER You look into the scanner, but, obviously, your retina isn't on file, so the lock doesn't open. NICE TRY RETURN TO PROMPT 92 PROMPT 173 GO TO THE MONORAIL! You approach the Loonies Monorail. Oddly, it doesn't seem to connect to any of the buildings in the complex, is just goes underground about 500 feet ahead, and, looking behind, you see that it emerges from the ground about 500 back of this station. Weird. You wonder what's beneath the complex that needs its own dedicated monorail. The door to the train is locked with a keycard slot, a keyhole, and a retina scanner. This all seems rather excessive. A. Examine Keycard Slot! GO TO PROMPT 248 B. Examine Keyhole! GO TO PROMPT 213 C. Examine retina scanner! GO TO PROMPT 92 PROMPT 180 TO THE RIVER! You find a river cutting through the forest, and, as luck would happen, a canoe that appears to have been recently abandoned. A. Steal the Canoe! GO TO PROMPT 220 B. Stealing is wrong! GO TO PROMPT 146 PROMPT 184 JUST HIT IT FOR A WHILE Well, it's not like the complex is really in good shape, so that should be doable. After awhile, the keypad breaks off and the gate slowly swings open. What now? A. Go to the field! GO TO PROMPT 207 B. Go to the offices! GO TO PROMPT 222 C. Go to the tower! GO TO PROMPT 158 D. Go to the monorail! GO TO PROMPT 173 PROMPT 185 APPROACH WITH CAUTION You carefully approach where you think the shadowy figure is standing and...it turns out to be just a sapling. Your eyes are playing tricks on you, it seems, and you probably should see an eye doctor, because you feel like you might need glasses or something. Your eyes definitely aren't what they used to be, that's for sure. Still, you can't help but feel like you're being watched. A. Shout in the darkness! GO TO PROMPT 195 B. Make a torch to help light the way! GO TO PROMPT 19 PROMPT 186 Call for help! Amazingly, not a great strategy in an abandoned complex. A. Pop open the hatch on the top! GO TO PROMPT 245 B. I'll just rewire the circuit! GO TO PROMPT 159 PROMPT 187 CHEWING TOBACCO! Can chewing tobacco go bad? Because this chewing tobacco...doesn't...taste.....right.... YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 191 SWIM DOWN THE RIVER It's a river, in the fall, in Canada. Hypothermia isn't a particularly pleasant way to go, but at least it's relatively fast. YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 193 7 and 7 You are allergic to 7up. Always have been. As your throat closes up, you reflect on how you wish you hadn't wasted your epi-pen trying to get over a hangover a couple of nights ago, but, well, you did. YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 194 PICK THE LOCK! Pick the lock? With what? You don't have any tools for the job, you don't have the skills for the job, you've got nothing! NOTHING! Oh, and the lock was booby-trapped, and by unsuccessfully picking it, you accidentally set off a land mine directly under your feet. Now, as you know, releasing the pressure on a land mine is what sets it off, so you're fine as long as you don't move. But you're trapped in the middle of an abandoned base with no food or water, and it's cold. Fortunately, as far as Canada goes, the Pacific Northwest is relatively temperate and you've got a good jacket. You won't die of exposure. But water? That's a bigger problem. Normally, getting water wouldn't be a big deal because it rains a lot in the Vancouver area, but the monorail platform is under a canopy to protect its passengers from the rain. You sit under the canopy day after day, watching it rain just a few feet away, but knowing that if you move, the mine goes off and you die. You spend the last day of your life in a delirium, barely able to think straight. You pass out around nightfall, and never wake up. YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 195 SHOUT AT THE DARKNESS When you shout at the darkness, the darkness shouts at you. YOU ARE DEAD (Somehow!) RETURN TO START! PROMPT 197 WAIT FOR IT Well, waiting in an elevator in an abandoned complex for several days does teach you something about hope, mainly through a lack of hope, but still, that's a sort of epiphany. And now you understand...sort of FIFTH CODE: add 17 RETURN TO START AND RETRIEVE ANOTHER TREASURE PROMPT 200 TONY GWYNN'S CHAW! Dude, are you sure, that didn't work out too well for Gwynn. A. Chewing tobacco is basically harmless! GO TO PROMPT 187 B. Okay, I'll go check Counsell's jersey! GO TO PROMPT 239 PROMPT 201 ENTER THE CABIN! Okay, you enter the cabin. It's empty...too empty. You're also hungry...too hungry. You decide to see if there's any food around. You find a can full of beans that appears to be bulging a bit, but, hell, beans are beans, right? Wrong. YOU DIE OF BOTULISM RETURN TO START PROMPT 204 Mojito Never the right answer! YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 206 BURN DOWN THE FOREST! You mean the forest you're standing in the middle of? Okay... The forest burns down. So do you. On the plus side, by burning to death, you skate on the arson charges the RCMP were probably going to charge you with, so it's not all bad. YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 207 GO TO THE FIELD Ah, the field, where the Loonies mounted their miserable season in the Expansion Cup, and where they would have played in Super-League II had they survived. Which, of course, they didn't. Wait...is that astroturf? Man, no wonder the Loonies didn't make it. Who puts astroturf in their stadium? It corrupts the purity of the game. A. Enter the clubhouse! GO TO PROMPT 145 B. It's clear the answer is in the bathroom! GO TO PROMPT 212 PROMPT 209 INTO THE COMPLEX The Loonies' complex stretches out before you. Once, this was to be the headquarters of a Super-League team that would play for championships. Now? It's lies in ruins, abandoned by its owner long ago. Still, if Kabeum's forlorn hope is actually a tangible object, it'll be in there. The front gate's locked, but there's a keypad.. A. Hit 1313! I've got a good feeling! GO TO PROMPT 129 B. Just hit they keypad until it breaks! GO TO PROMPT 184 PROMPT 211 IGNORE! You stroll through the woods a bit, and then find a cabin. It's not a particularly exciting cabin, to be honest. It's probably about...you want to say seventy or so years old. The wood's in reasonably good shape, at least. A. Enter the Cabin! GO TO PROMPT 201 B. Keep walking! Cabins are never good! GO TO PROMPT 244 PROMPT 212 BATHROOM! Oddly clean. Was that because it was hardly ever used, or is it a Canadian thing...I suppose you'll never know. Either way, you ah...you need to make a quick pitstop. Hold on... Okay, done. Now, then, what next? A. Wash your hands! GO TO PROMPT 249 B. No time! GO TO PROMPT 250 PROMPT 213 KEYHOLE! 'Tis a hole made for a key! A. Return to the Complex! GO TO PROMPT 184 B. Try and pick the lock! GO TO PROMPT 194 PROMPT 215 ELEVATOR And it breaks down. A. Call for help! GO TO PROMPT 186 B. Wait it out! GO TO PROMPT 147 PROMPT 216 A bar There appears to be a bar in this office building. Named "The Last Resort", it appears to have some sort of tropical island theme, which is deeply confusing, as an office building in the outskirts of Vancouver is about as far from a tropical island as you can get without having to go to Detroit. Still, it's a bar, and you're thirsty. Why not make yourself a drink. A. Make yourself a 7 and 7! GO TO PROMPT 193 B. I must have a Mojito! GO TO PROMPT 204 PROMPT 219 INSERT KEYCARD Part 1: a t e o s e d t r p 3 RETURN TO PROMPT 184 PROMPT 220 CANOOOOOOOOOOE! You get into the canoe and start heading down the river. And here come the rapids! A. Take it slow! GO TO PROMPT 132 B. Full speed ahead! GO TO PROMPT 141 PROMPT 222 GO TO THE OFFICES! The offices of the Vancouver Loonies! Boy, that's a tall building, must be fifteen stories or so, which seems rather excessive for a baseball team. What did they need all of those offices for? Hell, who are you kidding, probably a bunch of direct marketers trying to sell season tickets to the apathetic denizens of Vancouver. You enter the lobby, and notice that everything is covered in a fine coat of dust. Brushing the building directory clean, you see a note that reads "monorail key on 13th floor, be back soon" That seems like the place to go. So, how to get there? A. Elevator! GO TO PROMPT 215 B. Stairs! GO TO PROMPT 233 PROMPT 229 LET'S GET OUT OF HERE! You hear some voices in the distance. Maybe you want to check them out? Could be fun.... A. It's nothing to concern myself with! GO TO PROMPT 211 B. I must investigate! GO TO PROMPT 240 PROMPT 233 STAIRS! Okay, you make it to the thirteenth floor. There's a office down the hall and a bar to your right. A. The office! GO TO PROMPT 246 B. Wait? A Bar? Why is there a bar? GO TO PROMPT 216 PROMPT 235 CHARGE! You spring into action, charging as quickly as possible and...oh, right into the firepit! That's a shame. YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 239 COUNSELL's SHIRT You find a note pinned to the inside of the collar that says 'Room 314'. A. Find this room! GO TO PROMPT 255 B. Craig Counsell is the prince of lies! GO TO PROMPT 271 PROMPT 240 INVESTIGATE! You head towards the voices, and eventually you stumble on a campground populated by people in crudely-made garb. Their leader, a wizened old man who introduces himself as "Honeybark", explains that they are a band of survivalists who have abandoned civilized society and retired to the forest to live a simple existence, but now that an outsider has found them...well...certain protections need to be taken. Honeybark pulls out a crossbow. You ask if a crossbow is really fitting in with the primitive lifestyle they've carved out for themselves. Unfortunately, Honeybark shoots you in the skull and you never get to hear his explanation. YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 244 KEEP WALKING You see the Loonies' complex in the distance! You are being watched! There is a Shadowy figure in the background! Whoever this is, they must have been trailing you for a while now, and people don't tend to stalk people through the woods with good intentions, you know? A. Attack the Shadow with your torch! GO TO PROMPT 264 B. Ignore and keep heading to the Complex! GO TO PROMPT 209 PROMPT 245 POP OPEN THE TOP HATCH! Okay, you climb out on top of the elevator shart. This doesn't seem like the safest thing in the world. You see the long, dark shaft stretching out ahead of you. Keep you mind out of the gutter. You can see the door to the nearest exit about five feet above you, but there's nothing to climb up to get there. Looks like you'd have to jump. A. Jump to the nearest exit! GO TO PROMPT 295 B. Climb back into the car! GO TO PROMPT 147 PROMPT 246 Office! There's a key, and a note attached! It says "At Prompt 213, add "C. INSERT KEY! GO TO PROMPT 253 A. Move on! GO TO PROMPT 184! B. Exit building in needlessly dramatic and dangerous way! GO TO PROMPT 280 PROMPT 248 KEYCARD SLOT It's a slot for a keycard, how descriptive do you want me to be here? A. Return to the Complex! GO TO PROMPT 184 B. Try to break the lock! GO TO PROMPT 265 PROMPT 249 WASH YOUR HANDS! Good call. A. GO TO CLUBHOUSE! GO TO PROMPT 145 B. Look at the directory kiosk! GO TO PROMPT 300 PROMPT 250 NO TIME! Well, you know that there is time for? Dysentery! YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 253 INSERT KEY Part 2 l h e c o n g o o t 1 RETURN TO PROMPT 184 PROMPT 255 FIND ROOM 314 Er? How? A. Find some sort of directory! GO TO PROMPT 300 B. The directory is a trap! GO TO PROMPT 259 PROMPT 259 WANDER THE HALLS Man, this place feels like it was designed by Escher! A. Keep wandering! GO TO PROMPT 259 B. Curse out Escher! GO TO PROMPT 286 PROMPT 260 ACTIVATE RETINA SCANNER Part 3: l r l k p e o p m 1 PROMPT 264 ATTACK THE SHADOW You turn on the mysterious figure, tackle him to the ground and start pumelling him, after a while, he stops moving, and you roll off and take a closer look at the figure. It looks just like your grandfather, except as a young man...but that's not possible, that's not possible unless...you went back in time and killed your grandfather before your father was conceived meaning... YOU NO LONGER EXIST RETURN TO START PROMPT 265 TRY AND BREAK THE LOCK! Okay, make a roll for your lock pick skill...ooh, that's a critical failure. Might as well roll up a new character. Put more ranks in picking locks this time. YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 271 COUNSELL IS LYING TO ME! Okay, so, then, what do you want to do? A. Use the equipment in the room to create an effigy of Counsell, then burn it! GO TO PROMPT 305 B. No, you fool! You need to put the effigy at shortstop before you burn it! GO TO PROMPT 298 PROMPT 274 ROOM 314 You enter the room 314, not knowing what sure of horrifying scene you will find within. Perhaps a sentient T-Rex Hey, you find a keycard! AT PROMPT 248, you may add "C. INSERT KEYCARD INTO SLOT! GO TO PROMPT 219" RETURN TO PROMPT 184 PROMPT 280 DRAMA! You decide that, to commemorate your awesome retrieval of that key, that you need to exit this building in the most exciting way possible. Now, you don't have any pyrotechnics or anything like that handy, so you'll have to do the best with what you've got. You find a mail cart down the hall, and inspiration strikes you. You partially disassemble the top part of the cart, leaving just the wheels and axles. Next, you take a table from one of the conference rooms, it's not a great table, kind of flimsy, and probably made of inferior plywood, but it's good enough for your purposes. You find some duct tape in a supply closet, and then firmly attach the table to the wheels. Now you're close. As your final preparation, you tape your left foot to the table, no sense in sliding off. With your makeshift skateboard complete, you build up some speed, and then crash through a window on the side of a building, so that you can, in a sense, surf your way down from the thirteenth floor. It does look rather impressive, right up until you hit the ground. YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 286 CURSE OUT ESCHER! You want to gently caress with the original MC? Bad move. You are now trapped in a five-dimensional prison from which there is no escape. YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 295 Jump for it! Really? In a CYOA where basically anything even remotely dangerous has a 100% fatality rate? YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 298 BURN EFFIGY OUTSIDE That grass is pretty dry... And that is how grass fires are born. YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 300 DIRECTORY! Well, Room 314 is flashing on the screen, maybe head there? A. Yeah, let's go for that. GO TO PROMPT 274 B. No Machine is going to tell me what to do! GO TO PROMPT 302 PROMPT 302 FIGHT THE MACHINE The machine wins, the machine always win. YOU ARE DEAD RETURN TO START PROMPT 305 BURN EFFIGY IN CLUBHOUSE There's ah, a good reason why people burn effigies outside YOU ARE CRISPY RETURN TO START PROMPT 311 THE TRUTH The monorail door slides open, and you enter the train. It's pristine, and looks like it was never used. In fact, it might never have been used. You find yourself in front of the control panel, and you really have no idea how the hell a monorail works. In fact, all of your experience with monorails come from that one episode of The Simpsons. You check a nearby closet for a possum that you can call 'Bitey'. There is no possum in the closet. This is most disappointing. After futzing with the buttons for a bit, the panel comes to life, with its buttons lighting up, and dials spring into action. You're making progress! You find a handle that you think is the throttle, and slowly slide it forward. The train lurches into motion, confirming your intuition. The train soon heads into the tunnel, and you realize that the Loonies never got around to installing lights in the tunnel, which makes it very hard to see where you're going. You keep the monorail at a low speed, lest you suddenly hit a curve and derail. Eventually, after what feels like an hour, you emerge out of another tunnel, and chug into the same station that you left from. Huh. You were expected some sort of answers, and got nothing. And really, that sums up the experience of the Vancouver Loonies pretty much perfectly. FIFTH CODE: add 17 REAL FIFTH CODE: subtract 24 RETURN TO START AND RETRIEVE ANOTHER TREASURE Smasher Dynamo fucked around with this message at 20:10 on Nov 28, 2012 |
# ? Nov 28, 2012 05:45 |
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Sticking with my last Pick 'em picks of Unicorns and Mooglies.
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# ? Nov 28, 2012 06:38 |
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Does anyone have anything that could occupy the thread for a few days? I want to take about a week off between seasons, but I know that the longer I take off, the better chances that multiple owners will drop out. So, with that in mind, I'm open to suggestions for filler so I can take a bit of a break.
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# ? Nov 28, 2012 06:52 |
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Someone could just run a playoff series between many of the dead teams of the past that we can vote on, I guess, if someone's still got the files to run them.
CraigK fucked around with this message at 07:02 on Nov 28, 2012 |
# ? Nov 28, 2012 06:55 |
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Smasher Dynamo posted:Does anyone have anything that could occupy the thread for a few days? I want to take about a week off between seasons, but I know that the longer I take off, the better chances that multiple owners will drop out. If someone's willing to do the bookkeeping, we could do the drafts in-thread. That would take a couple days.
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# ? Nov 28, 2012 07:05 |
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I don't really care what it is as long as: A. It doesn't involve me doing any extra work B. It doesn't kill all interest in the Super-League.
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# ? Nov 28, 2012 07:35 |
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Mornacale posted:If someone's willing to do the bookkeeping, we could do the drafts in-thread. That would take a couple days. This is a fun idea! We can do a draft with every owner getting like six hours to make their pick.
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# ? Nov 28, 2012 07:38 |
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tatankatonk posted:This is a fun idea! We can do a draft with every owner getting like six hours to make their pick. You could stand slightly longer because there are many less rounds to get through, though the established draft preferences help. We can use Smasher's list and a 'veterans committee' to do absenteeism. Cthulhu Dreams fucked around with this message at 07:48 on Nov 28, 2012 |
# ? Nov 28, 2012 07:41 |
tatankatonk posted:This is a fun idea! We can do a draft with every owner getting like six hours to make their pick. A schedule might be better even with a lot of down time. Say pick #9 is slotted for Friday 10pm ET and it doesn't matter if 6, 7, and 8 are all available in the morning and get their picks done in 30 minutes.
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# ? Nov 28, 2012 09:18 |
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UltimoDragonQuest posted:If the clock resets after every pick, 6 hours is just short enough to gently caress over people for sleeping, working, or living in the wrong time zone. Yeah, there's really no reason not to do it like this, since we'll presumably know exactly how many picks need to be made in exactly how much time.
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# ? Nov 28, 2012 09:34 |
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Since you guys are the ones drafting, I'll let you decide how handle the draft.Cthulhu Dreams posted:
This isn't a bad idea, although I think that, just to keep people engaged, whoever is running it might want to let the thread decide of what team they want to make into... Oh, who am I kidding, if you're going to do this, you have to do the 1969 Seattle Pilots, don't you?
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# ? Nov 28, 2012 10:12 |
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Smasher Dynamo posted:Since you guys are the ones drafting, I'll let you decide how handle the draft. Why those guys?
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# ? Nov 28, 2012 10:17 |
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Cthulhu Dreams posted:
Same team Ball Four was written about.
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# ? Nov 28, 2012 10:19 |
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# ? May 13, 2024 06:59 |
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Cthulhu Dreams posted:Why those guys? That's what the thread voted for in Smasher's BBM LP after his last run. Also, Smasher, in the module, one of the Prompt 248 options directs you to Prompt 262, but it should send you to 265
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# ? Nov 28, 2012 16:30 |