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StupidSexyMothman
Aug 9, 2010

Cthulhu Dreams posted:

Want to trade me Beltran for something? Maybe Cuyler? He did well last season for me.

Edit: Let's make this an offer

:siren: 1930's Kiki Cuyler for whatever Beltran you have. He's never going to put up Beltran's power numbers, but he hits for average, gets on base and can steal some bases, and has somehting resembling a plus glove.

He's a defensive sub for gold glover Larry Walker who's blocking him in RF.

Sold, take my accursed Beltran. May he stare idly at nary a curveball for thee!

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Ginge
Sep 8, 2011

Well, Chippy is already my favourite character!
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Also, I've decided to only do one more pick-'em update. This is because a) I'm not sure at the minute how the last round of the Gauntlet is working, and b) dramatic tension.

Cthulhu Dreams
Dec 11, 2010

If I pretend to be Cthulhu no one will know I'm a baseball robot.

oldskool posted:

Sold, take my accursed Beltran. May he stare idly at nary a curveball for thee!

Got a year on this guy? Need to update my notes.

StupidSexyMothman
Aug 9, 2010

Honestly no. My best guess would be 2011 but there's apparently another one running around so unless two people took the 2011 Giants as feeders I have no idea.

StupidSexyMothman fucked around with this message at 17:06 on Nov 30, 2012

mentholmoose
Nov 5, 2009

YKNOW THERES ONLY ONE DIRECTION I KNOW AND THATS DRIVIN STRAIGHT TO THE NET

oldskool posted:

Honestly no. My best guess would be 2011 but there's apparently another one running around so unless two people took the 2011 Giants as feeders I have no idea.

He played for the Mets too in 2011, so it's possible that there's two floating around.

Robert Deadford
Mar 1, 2008
Ultra Carp
Pick 'em!

Cleveland and Lombard Street to advance!

CVE
Jan 27, 2012

Pick ZWEI!

Cleveland Emperors
Florida Oranges
Lombard St. Gumshoes
Ted Sox
[/quote]

And so the Emperors got absorbed by the Unicorns. At least the name carries on.

I'll be back in the next Expansion cup hopefully with a more successful team and a gimmick that helps you write interesting stuff.

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."


The following contest is scheduled for the best four-out-of-seven games, and it is for the undisputed championship of Super-League VII!

Introducing first, the challenger, and the reigning champion of the Dynamo League. They are the two-time defending Vae Victis Division Champions, and ayatollahs of rock 'n rolla, hailing from the rad wastes of Northwestern Illinois, they are the Rockford Losers!



The Losers come into this series have defeated the Imperialists and Finger-Bangers. There is some concern, however, that Satchel Paige's re-roll might have gone terribly wrong, as can occasionally happen, and Lord Mayor Humungus has been working with his AI manager to try and find a work-around for this problem.



Rockford Municipal Stadium
Rockford, IL

Rockford Municipal Stadium will host Games 4, 5, 6 and 7 of this series.

[url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yCR85u9QngQ]And now, the defending Super-League Champions, they are the two-time Smasher League Champions, four-time Senor Goodtimes Division Champions, and the current unified Television and Heavyweight Champions. From the city of Chicago, and still living in a state of Grace, ladies and gentlemen, these are your Chicago Bobbleheads!.





Wrigley Field
Chicago, IL

Wrigley Field will host Games 1, 2 and 3 of this series.


Game 1

Don May posted:


MADDUX THROWS TWO-HITTER, BOBBLEHEADS TAKE GAME 1

Chicago- Paige had his struggles, but ultimately they made no difference as the Bobbleheads cruised to an easy Game 1.

Greg Maddux seemed almost preternaturally relaxed as he dominated a Losers' lineup that looked tense and unprepared for play on the grandest stage of the Super-League. The Losers only managed two hits, both of them singles, and no walks against Maddux, who struck out nine on the to a complete-game shutout.

Paige, the Losers' ace who had done so well in the previous two series openers, struggled, and was taken out after less than four innings of work by a furious Lord Mayor Humungus. Asked for an explanation as to this quick hook, Humungus could barely control his fury, "Why would I take out a pitcher who had already given up three runs in a game where every run was dear? Why would I want to go to my bullpen as I saw the game slowly slipping from my grasp? Why would I do what I had to be done for the betterment of my team? Reporters, you are all fools. The game was at a turning point, if we did not reverse the flow the game, we were sure to lose, and I thought that by replacing Paige early, I could get him more rest for Game 4, and perhaps change the momentum. I only was able to achieve one of these goals, though..."

Mark Grace was clearly not focused on the matter at hand, even if it didn't seem to do his team any harm, "I can feel it now, I can feel it coming. We are going to win this series, we are going to face the Macho Men, and then....then I don't know. Maybe we'll all get killed, maybe we'll win, but I know that's where this story ends." Grace stared off into the distance before finally settling his gaze on the reporters in front of him.

"I know that we're going to win this series. The Losers will have their day, some time, some season, but not now, not now. No, I feel as though this is the last time the Bobbleheads will ever play in the Super-League. The end of an era.."

Game 2 will take place in Chicago. Curt Schilling will start for the Chicago Bobbleheads as Jerry Koosman will try and work some left-handed magic for the Losers.

Box Score




Game 2

Don May posted:


SCHILLING BLANKS LOSERS, BOBBLEHEADS TAKE 2-0 SERIES LEAD

Chicago- This was not how the Losers wanted this series to start.

18 innings, 8 hits, 0 runs, 2 losses. The numbers speak for themselves. The Losers have not been hitting, and they now find themselves in a deep 0-2 hole in the series.

Even worse, the Losers couldn't even pick up a game where the Bobbleheads offense was pretty pathetic itself. In this game, two Losers pitchers combined to allow only three hits, and yet they still fell 2-0 in today's game, as Curt Schilling threw a shutout of his own to match Maddux's fine performance yesterday, leaving the Losers monumentally frustrated.

Schilling had no mercy, "You're asking if I feel bad about what's happening to the Rockford Losers? Why would I do that? Let's be honest, 'Rockford' is just a fancy way of saying 'Loser City', so, translated, the real name of the team is the Loser City Losers, and, big shock, they lost. Because they're losers, and that's what they do. After all, what kind of guy would put his team in Rockford, anyway? A person who is either from Rockford, and therefore is a loser by birth, or he chose to put his team in Rockford for some other reason, which makes him a loser by choice. Either way, the man is a loser, his team is a pack of losers, and, realistically, it's the job of a loser to lose. But hey, at least this team is good at their jobs."

Mark Grace didn't seem inclined to apologize for his pitcher's comments, "I am mentally checked out already, to be honest. I mean, I don't know, it's kind of like how in your Senior year, you don't really give a poo poo what happens in your last semester of high school. gently caress, I must have skipped every other Friday that semester. Also, pep rallies. Man, at my school, they used to schedule pep rallies for the end of the day, and you didn't want to be there. Who the gently caress gives a poo poo about high school spirit anyway? Anyone who actually enjoyed a pep rally is a total rear end in a top hat. Wait, what was your question again?"

Game 3 will be the last game in Chicago for this series. Jason Schmidt will start for the Bobbleheads, and will face Tom Seaver of the Losers in one of the bigger pitching mismatches in recent Super-League history. The Losers will be trying to avoid going 0-3 before heading back to Rockford.

Box Score




Game 3

Don May posted:


BOBBLEHEADS WIN 5-4, ON VERGE OF SWEEP

Chicago- The Losers aren't dead yet, but they're very close.

To be fair, the Losers certainly did look better than they had in the first two games, scoring three runs in the top of the first to give them an early 3-0 lead. Sadly, it was all downhill from there, as the Bobbleheads were able to slowly, but surely, come back and overtake the Losers, eventually pulling ahead on a Gehringer RBI single in the bottom of the eighth.

With this win, the Bobbleheads moved within one game of winning their second straight Super-League Championship, and within one game of a showdown with the Macho Men. Mark Grace seemed a lot more focused on the latter, "Hey, I'm trying to pay attention, but ever since we won the championship last year, we've changed. And not in the entertaining 'team gets too cocky, gets defeated by upstart, and must train to regain edge' sort of way. I mean, that's a time tested formula, Rocky III made like a billion dollars despite the fact that Mr. T got second billing. But no, ever since we won the championship last season, something changed in us, and we just stopped losing. We have held the Heavyweight Championship every since we swept the Landers in the first round of last year's playoffs. Do you know what that means? It means we avoided being swept for a full season. We won 108 games despite playing 44 games, that's over a quarter of our schedule, against the Landers and Eazy W's, who won 100 and 99 games respectively. We swept the Landers to end the season and unify the Television and Heavyweight Titles. We've gone 7-1 in the playoffs so far. I don't know what happened to us, but we've become something...something different than a Super-League team, something bigger, something that transcends this whole drat league and I know now that we don't belong here anymore. The Macho Men, they're the only team left that can handle us now. This...is the fate of all teams that outgrow the Super-League, and we are powerless to resist it."

Lord Mayor Humungus was unwilling to concede victory to the Bobbleheads, "Mark Grace, you talk of outgrowing the Super-League, being beyond us! You are beyond nothing! This series is not over yet, Grace! This 0-3 deficit is not a death sentence for my team, for you will be forced to play the next four games in my home field, which, I assure you, will be most unwelcoming to your team. And, to begin our comeback, I have decided to start Satchel Paige on short rest. You may have gotten the better of him in Game 1, but I promise you that you will not find a repeat of that performance to be easily achieved! Mark Grace, savor this moment, because this is your high-water mark, this is climax, where the story turns and drags you down to your tragic denouement. You will see some how serious I am."

Game 4 is a potential elimination game, and will take place in Rockford. Satchel Paige will try to keep the Losers alive as Tom Glavine gets his first start of the season for the Bobbleheads.

Box Score




Game 4

Don May posted:


BOBBLEHEADS WIN SL CHAMPIONSHIP WITH 7-4 WIN, MACHO MEN AWAIT!

Rockford- Nothing good ever happens in Rockford.

With a 7-4 win that was not even as close as the final score indicates, the Bobbleheads completed a four-game sweep of the Losers, repeating as Super-League Champions and setting up a Commissar's Challenge Series against the Macho Men.

Paige had another mediocre start, and was pulled early as Humungus began to panic in the face of another devastating loss. He hoped that his bullpen would be able to hold the line against the Bobbleheads, and was bitterly disappointed as they gave up five runs in five innings. To be fair, most of those runs came off of Roberto Hernandez, the weakest member of the Losers' bullpen, and probably not a pitcher who should have been included on the team's postseason roster.

Humungus had no comments after the game, swiftly retreating to the Rockford City Hall to plan his next move.

As for the Bobbleheads, with their victory, their path became all too clear. They had taken up the Commissar's Challenge and, as a result, they must now face the Macho Men in a best-of-nine series. If the Bobbleheads win, then no one is quite sure what would happen. In the past, it has seemed impossible for the Macho Men to lose, but in light of the unprecedented challenge posed by the Bobbleheads, this may just be the season when the world finds out what the consequences of a Macho Men defeat would be.

Not that the Macho Men appear particularly concerned with this new threat, having already hinted to reporters that, should they win, the player they will be taking from the Bobbleheads will be none other than Mark Grace, their captain. Speaking for the team, Ferris Fain explained, "Oh, yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah! The Macho Men are bakc. And you know, to kill a team, it takes more than just getting rid of the players, you've got to destroy their spirit! And that's why we've got our sights set on Mark Grace, yeeeeeeeeeeah. See, if we leave Mark Grace behind, then maybe blakelmenakle can rebuild, but if we take him away, then he'll be left with nothing but a tabula rasa. Oh, yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah!"

The nest-of-nine series will use the DH rule, and the Macho Men have promised that it will be, "A series so epic that entire Earth might be destroyed in the process."

Box Score

Monicro
Oct 21, 2010

And you could feel his features in the air
A wide smile and perfect hair
He had complete control of the rising tides
And a medicine bag hanging at his side

In the flowing blue world of the death-dealing physician
Go forth, Bobbleheads. I believe in you :911:

ToiletofSadness
Mar 27, 2010
Who the gently caress replaced my Satchel Paige with the Bronies' copy? Secondly, did every single position player on my roster get a bad roll in the finals series file? I can't believe that Frank Robinson was my only starter capable of hitting above the Mendoza line against that pitching staff. I literally don't believe it.

Congrats, Bobbleheads. Beat the Macho Men and let chaos reign!

edit: Smasher, one last question: is there a way to set my strategy sliders in the future to get my brain-dead AI manager to leave my starters out on the field longer? I'm fully aware I only really have 2.5 or 3 capable relievers, so I'm a little baffled why my AI manager would be so quick on the hook to bring on the bullpen.

edit2: And the AI didn't even use my best reliever Smoltz once over the course of the whole series! What the hell?

ToiletofSadness fucked around with this message at 02:10 on Dec 1, 2012

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."
Some housekeeping

First, unless the owners of Catalina 2 Fish 1 Bubble, Flushing Flying Dutchmen and the Venice Beach Surf show up in the next 48 hours, I'm eliminating their teams.

Second, the Oranges-Cultists boondoggle is approved.

Third, because we're almost certainly going to have three more slots in Super-League VIII to fill, they will distributed as follows. The Coburns will be given one of the slots. The other two will go to the second and third-place finishes in Round 9 of the Gauntlet, with the following proviso:

-Senerio does not wish to continue his Saints into Super-League VIII, but is even less inclined to let the Bulldogs survive because of a long-standing grudge between the two owners. Therefore, the Saints, if they survive the final round of the Gauntlet, will give their spot in Super-League VIII to the third-place finisher in Round 8 of the Gauntlet, if the Bulldogs end up being last in the final round of the Gauntlet.

e: As you point out, ToiletofSadness, Paige has been this bad before in the Super-League, so this wasn't wholly unprecedented. As for the struggles of your lineup, sometimes these things just happen.

My guess is that they just weren't a lineup particularly well-suited to deal with the relatively high-K starters of the Bobbleheads.

As for the AI issue, I'm not sure exactly what the problem is, because sometimes your manager will let Don Drysdale throw 140 pitches, and sometimes he'll pull Paige after four or five innings. The Skyhawks had the same problem in their last couple of seasons.

And your manager didn't use Smoltz because you were never really that close to winning a game. If he were going to use Smoltz, it would have been in Game 3, but I guess the AI was foolishly saving for him for the save opportunity, which, admittedly, is rather realistic.

Smasher Dynamo fucked around with this message at 02:38 on Dec 1, 2012

ToiletofSadness
Mar 27, 2010

Smasher Dynamo posted:

e: As you point out, ToiletofSadness, Paige has been this bad before in the Super-League, so this wasn't wholly unprecedented. As for the struggles of your lineup, sometimes these things just happen.

My guess is that they just weren't a lineup particularly well-suited to deal with the relatively high-K starters of the Bobbleheads.

As for the AI issue, I'm not sure exactly what the problem is, because sometimes your manager will let Don Drysdale throw 140 pitches, and sometimes he'll pull Paige after four or five innings. The Skyhawks had the same problem in their last couple of seasons.

And your manager didn't use Smoltz because you were never really that close to winning a game. If he were going to use Smoltz, it would have been in Game 3, but I guess the AI was foolishly saving for him for the save opportunity, which, admittedly, is rather realistic.
Yeah, previous mediocrity aside, it's not like I wasn't going to not start Paige in this series...ah, well.

Looking through the box scores again, yeah, my team struck out a little bit more than I'd like (especially Youk and Tejada who were black holes on offense for most of the playoffs), but I just couldn't draw a walk to help out the hitting woes (4 total over the whole series). Bobbleheads' starters were apparently just throwing BBs all series.

I suppose, using Myers over Smoltz made sense from a platoon advantage standpoint, but, still, it's not like the AI manager doesn't use Smoltz for 2 inning non-save appearances most of the time anyway.

Given my team held Ruth and Grace to a combined 2 XBHs, I was hoping for a better result than a complete sweep. Tough beat.

Mooseontheloose
May 13, 2003
The Ted Sox Gauntlet Line up Repost

Line up:

1. RF Tris Speaker L
2. 2B Julio Franco R
3. 1B Palmerio L
4. DH Juan Gonzales R
5. LF Jim Rice R
6. CF Willie Mays R
7. C Ivan Rodrigues R
8. SS Ray Chapman R
9. 3B Brooks Robinson R

Evans Catching:

1. RF Tris Speaker L
2. 2B Julio Franco R
3. 1B Palmerio L
4. DH Juan Gonzales R
5. LF Jim Rice R
6. CF Willie Mays R
7. 3B Brooks Robinson R
8. SS Ray Chapman R
9. C Al Evans R

Gauntlet Rotation

SP1: Kevin Brown 93 Rangers
SP2: Stan Coveleski 17 Inidans
SP3: Early Wynn 46 Senators
SP4: Warren Sphan 48 Braves (Evans Catcher)
Mopup: Jim Palmer 1966 O’s

Closer: Rob Nenn 93 Rangers
Setup: Tom Henke 93 Rangers
Short: Rick Honneycut 1989 A’s
Short: Red Barrett 48 Braves
Middle: Darren Oliver 93 Rangers

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."
In case anyone's wondering, here's a sketch of how I think the alignment for next season is going to go down.

Dynamo League (no-DH)

Memento Mori Division
Burma Imperialists
Portland Bulldogs/Lombard St. Gumshoes
Cancun Tornados
Florida Dickshots
Coburns

Vae Victis Division
Rockford Losers
Rochester Generics
Dubai Dervishes
Albany Pessimists
San Juan Elephants

Sic Transit Vir Division
Fukuoka Finger-Bangers
Antarctica Unspecifieds
Cleveland Unicorns/Florida Oranges
Web 2.0 Bloggers

Smasher League (DH)

Mark Bellhorn Division
Finger Lakes Phoenixes
Cleveland Commies
Barons
Hartford Whalers
New England Arguments

Senor Goodtimes Division
Luna Landers
Untitled Blakelmenakle Project
Wausau Woodchucks
Seattle Suicides
New Orleans Mashers
Philadelphia Failures

Norris-Smythe Division
Ryleh Cutlists
South Bolton Eazy W's
Oxbridge Mathematicians
Cuba Smokers
Spokane Air Raids


That's basically how I see things going down, although if the Ted Sox survive, then someone else would be bumped to the Dynamo League.

Mornacale
Dec 19, 2007

n=y where
y=hope and n=folly,
prospects=lies, win=lose,

self=Pirates
Even as someone who stands to gain from them, unbalanced divisions are gross.

Senerio
Oct 19, 2009

Roëmænce is ælive!

Smasher Dynamo posted:

-Senerio does not wish to continue his Saints into Super-League VIII, but is even less inclined to let the Bulldogs survive because of a long-standing grudge between the two owners. Therefore, the Saints, if they survive the final round of the Gauntlet, will give their spot in Super-League VIII to the third-place finisher in Round 8 of the Gauntlet, if the Bulldogs end up being last in the final round of the Gauntlet.


My specific issue is with the fact that the Portland Bulldogs have taken advantage of the new owner 11th point without being punished. Sure, you can argue with the fact that the loss of dispersal draft picks would be enough of a punishment, but I feel that is far, far too little, especially because he had already vacated a pick and was all the way down at #14. That I cannot abide.


Second City Saints Roster for the Gauntlet:
CF: 2003 Carlos Beltran
3B: 1960 Eddie Mathews/1992 David Wright
LF: 1919 Joe Jackson
RF: 1960 Hank Aaron
C: 2005 Mike Piazza (1960 Del Crandall catches for Whitey Ford and Dizzy Dean)
1B: 2003 Todd Helton
2B:2003 Jose Vidro/1992 Jeff Kent
SS:2005 José Reyes
Bench:
1. 2005 Cliff Floyd
Minors:
2003 Mark Bellhorn

Draft Whitey Ford
Pedro Martinez
Catfish Hunter from challenges
Dizzy Dean From Phantoms
Draft Red Faber
Relievers:
CL: Dennis Eckersley From Phantoms
1992 John Franco Setup
2003 Brian Fuentes Short
2005 Heath Bell Short
1960 Don McMahon Mid (mcmahdo02)
1911 Harry Krause (From Mooglies) Long
Minors:
1960 Juan Pizarro

Senerio fucked around with this message at 04:45 on Dec 1, 2012

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

Mornacale posted:

Even as someone who stands to gain from them, unbalanced divisions are gross.

The Sic Transit Vir Division will have five teams, I'm just not sure who those teams are yet.

But, yeah, if you guys want six divisions, then it has to go 5/6/5 in each league, there's just no other way to do it.

BearDrivingTruck
Oct 15, 2011

You see the most shocking sights sometimes
I'm in Vae Victis? Have mercy on me, Lord Mayor.

CraigK
Nov 4, 2008

by exmarx
Yay, wild card!

ToiletofSadness
Mar 27, 2010

BearDrivingTruck posted:

I'm in Vae Victis? Have mercy on me, Lord Mayor.
You want mercy? Go to church.

Seriously, you new guys should take some inspiration from the Generics. They were, if I remember correctly, one of the worst teams during their Expansion Cup but were able to survive a Vae Victis with 3 90-win teams because of strong drafting. I think they even finished above .500 that season. They gave Dubai a hell of a fight this season.

Mornacale
Dec 19, 2007

n=y where
y=hope and n=folly,
prospects=lies, win=lose,

self=Pirates
Smart baseball thinkers know that the Generics' run was due mainly to Chick Hafey.

mrnoun
Jul 24, 2007


From the fantastical land of Barrow, which is either a small city in England or a fantastical kingdom where wizards and demons fight an endless war for supremacy over the Kingdom of Albion, the Daydreamers hoped to become the first British in Super-League history to not be astonishingly disappointing! Spoiler: they failed.

Owner: gingemidget
Location: Barrow-in-Furness, Cumbria, UK
Home Grounds: Trethowan Park

Teams Used
1918 New York Yankees
1979 Texas Rangers
1993 Atlanta Braves
2001 Chicago White Sox

Past Records
103-59, Skyhawks Division Champions
Lost 1-4 to Polyarny Postmodernists in TLCS

Super League VII
75-87, 4th in Dies Irae Division

Gauntlet VI
Round 5: 19-21, 3rd Place, Relegated


She was the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen in my life. She had a body men would start wars for, tall, graceful, willowy. Or possibly petite and curvaceous. I can't quite recall now. Her face had an ethereal beauty to it, the regal perfection of a Greek statue, or possibly the smouldering sensuality of an angel looking for an excuse to fall. Her hair was amazing, though I can't actually remember if it was long or short, or what color it was. Her eyes would haunt me forever, but I remember nothing about them. She was the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen in my life, but I don't know what she looked like.

We stood on a beach, on a cool, crisp spring morning, the kind you get right at the start of the year. Overhead, a pair of gulls circled, waiting for tourists to steal from. It'd be a few weeks yet before the tourists showed up, but they were patient. Their calls, and the gentle lapping of wave on sand, was all we could hear, though I know that spot, and usually you can hear traffic from the street behind you from there. Today, there was no one but us, and the gulls. The early morning sunlight kissed the water at just that perfect angle that gives it a red sheen, but I was not a sailor and took no warning. The sand, a brilliant white in the early sun, was still chilled from the long winter, so that it felt almost like curling my toes in a strange, coarse snow. And she said, "Nobody's ever won anything with the 90's Braves," and the world was jarred from its moorings.

It was summer now, in the woods behind the house where I grew up. I knew them well; there was little else to do in the middle of nowhere but explore the woods. And believe me, I spent most of my childhood looking for other things to do. But today, with the trees shading us from the blazing sun, it felt like the most natural place in the world to be, as if I fit there in a way I never had as a kid. I was immersed in the sounds of the place, the cries of birds overhead, the rustling of leaves in the breeze, and beneath it all, the unremitting buzz of the infinite insectile hordes that plagued those woods. But today, they were not pests; I felt connected to the world around me in a way I never had in the past, and she said, "I don't think Al Oliver is going to work out in center in the Super League," and the life around me faded to nothing.

The leaves were turning now, but they felt far away. The old school building, faded bricks and bad memories, loomed above us, but we stood facing away from it, looking out across the parking lot at the old ball field. I'd heard they'd renovated the place, but I couldn't see anything different about it: same old crumbling wooden fence surrounding the outfield, same ragged old basketball hoops beyond it, same complete absence of kids here on the weekends. I didn't have many fond memories of that ball field, and looking at it made me feel strangely guilty somehow. So instead, I focused on the basketball courts. I'd spent most of my adult life immersed in that game, playing, watching, even coaching. But as I looked, it came back to me: as a kid, I'd been loving terrible at it. There were no good memories to hide in here, and she said, "Mark Wohlers? He's terrible!" and the world sunk into darkness.

It was bitter cold in the corridor. It was pitch black, too, though somehow I could still see. The walls were a smooth, uniform grey, the tiled floor a dirty off-white. Overhead hung dingy fluorescent lights, though they weren't actually on, and there didn't seem to be any way to turn them on. I walked, my legs moving even though I couldn't recall having told them to. I knew she was behind me, beautiful as ever, but somehow, I didn't want to turn and look at her. Even though I knew it was a dream, my legs ached from the walking, and my lungs burned with the endless cold. Finally, we reached an intersection and stopped, and she spoke and the world did not fade.

"You've seen where you came from. Now choose where you're going. Down one path, reality: the Daydreamers were not a very good team. As was inevitable, they have been relegated. It's all over. There's nothing left but to move on, alone. Down the other path, the dream: eternal, unchanging, a chance to live forever in that one moment before it all went bad."

Put like that, the choice was obvious.

blakelmenakle
Sep 1, 2007
AHEM! There's sand on my boots!


Macho-Man Showdown

Line-up
1.) SS: Derek Jeter '06
2.) 1B: Mark Grace
3.) DH: Babe Ruth
4.) CF: Josh Hamilton
5.) 3B: Alex Rodriguez
6.) RF: Gary Sheffield
7.) LF: Brian Giles
8.) C: Rudy York (Jorge Posada catches for Tom Glavine)
9.) 2B: Charlie Gehringer (vs. RHP)/Craig Biggio (vs. LHP)

Bench
Jorge Posada
Craig Biggio
Hank Greenberg
Jason Giambi
Andruw Jones
Derek Jeter '10

Pitching
1.) Greg Maddux
2.) Curt Schilling
3.) Jason Schmidt
4.) Tom Glavine
CL: Rich Gossage
SU: Mariano Rivera
SR: Larry Andersen
SR: Norm Charlton
MR: Craig Lefferts
LR/Mopup: Mike Mussina



In the unlikely event that the Bobbleheads should lose, is there a list of feeder teams left over somewhere? It's been a couple months and I wouldn't know how far back in the thread I'd have to go to track them down. And to confirm it's 10 points plus 3 carryover players from the Bobbleheads (minus Grace)?

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

blakelmenakle posted:

In the unlikely event that the Bobbleheads should lose, is there a list of feeder teams left over somewhere? It's been a couple months and I wouldn't know how far back in the thread I'd have to go to track them down. And to confirm it's 10 points plus 3 carryover players from the Bobbleheads (minus Grace)?

It's in that new thread I made for new owners a while back. And, yeah, it's 10 points plus three players, and you'll need a new logo.

blackmongoose
Mar 31, 2011

DARK INFERNO ROOK!

ToiletofSadness posted:

You want mercy? Go to church.

Seriously, you new guys should take some inspiration from the Generics. They were, if I remember correctly, one of the worst teams during their Expansion Cup but were able to survive a Vae Victis with 3 90-win teams because of strong drafting. I think they even finished above .500 that season. They gave Dubai a hell of a fight this season.

Yeah, expansion cup results don't mean a great deal. The Unspecifieds had the 2nd worst cup record, but we still kept pace with the Finger-Bangers until the last couple weeks and avoided the gauntlet. With wild cards in place now, there are several expansion teams that I think have a good shot at a playoff spot.

ForeverBWFC
Oct 19, 2011

Oh, the lads! You should've seen 'em running!
Ask 'em why and they reply the Bolton Boys are coming! All the lads and lasses, smiles upon their faces,

WALKING DOWN THE MANNY ROAD, TO SEE THE BURNDEN ACES!

mrnoun posted:

the Daydreamers hoped to become the first British in Super-League history to not be astonishingly disappointing!

I will end you...

Cthulhu Dreams
Dec 11, 2010

If I pretend to be Cthulhu no one will know I'm a baseball robot.

Smasher Dynamo posted:

It's in that new thread I made for new owners a while back. And, yeah, it's 10 points plus three players, and you'll need a new logo.

Do you need a new script, one for 14 and one for 16? Or did I just miscount the numbers? That would be one save file wouldn't it? Maybe 30?

Ginge
Sep 8, 2011

Well, Chippy is already my favourite character!
I rather enjoyed that mrnoun, thanks.

Hopefully I'll be back in SLIX, maybe even with starting pitchers that can survive a whole week of games without getting injured this time!

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

Cthulhu Dreams posted:

Do you need a new script, one for 14 and one for 16? Or did I just miscount the numbers? That would be one save file wouldn't it? Maybe 30?

No, I formatted that a bit weird, but there will be 16 teams in each league again. I'm just not sure who is going to be in the Dynamo League yet, which is why I listed them the way I did.

StupidSexyMothman
Aug 9, 2010

Cuyler in for Wright at RF, all other lineup changes as posted.

tatankatonk
Nov 4, 2011

Pitching is the art of instilling fear.
Pick 'Em!
Cleveland
Gumshoes

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."



Results










Due to a technicality, the Unicorns can't be relegated in the final round of the Gauntlet. So, I guess we'll see just how much Barry Bonds has improved your team in Super-League VIII.

Oh, I guess you are playing for your fifth Intercontinental Championship, so that's something.







In the same boat as the Unicorns, the Oranges will also automatically survive into Super-League VIII. Don't put Joba in your starting rotation this time, if not for yourself, then for me.







You're not technically dead yet. If the Bulldogs end up in last place in the final round of the Gauntlet, then your team will survive, because Senerio is deadset on making sure the Bulldogs get relegated if he can. Given how well the Oranges and Unicorns are playing, that's probably a fifty-fifty shot, and those are odds that Detective Don Slaught is willing to gamble on.







One of my dad's favorite clips from The Simpsons is where Homer becomes a Krusty look-a-like. So Homer-as-Krusty is at the opening of a new KrustyBurger, and a Hamburglar knockoff shows up. Homer being Homer, he doesn't realize that it's not real, so starts savagely beating the Hamburglar knockoff for a long time, at which point the camera pans to the faces of the horrified children who have been watching the grisly scene, and one of them cries out "Stop, stop! He's already dead!"

So, yeah.


Next Time!













FINAL Pick'em!
PICK THREE!
Cleveland Unicorns
Florida Oranges
Portland Bulldogs
Second City Saints

BearDrivingTruck
Oct 15, 2011

You see the most shocking sights sometimes
Can I join in Pick 'Em even if I haven't up until now? If so, then Unicorns, Oranges, and Bulldogs.

mentholmoose
Nov 5, 2009

YKNOW THERES ONLY ONE DIRECTION I KNOW AND THATS DRIVIN STRAIGHT TO THE NET


Pick 'em (Although I think there's no way any other owners can catch up to me, I'll do it anyway)

Cleveland, Florida, and Portland advance.

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."
Yeah, well, in other good news, the live draft is going to start on Monday, after the final Gauntlet update. Hopefully, this will give a me of time off from the thread, so that I can finish the last few obits I need to, as well as prepare for Super-League VIII.

Anyway, since Catalina is going to be bumped from the league, that means that the Spokane Air Raids will have the first selection, so ManifunkDestiny, that's something to keep in mind. I'll think I'll use a twelve-hour clock or so for picks.

Beyond that, if and when the Bobbleheads gets retired by the Macho Men, both the Heavyweight Championship and Television Championships will be vacated. I'm not sure who gets the Heavyweight title. I'll probably run a quick tournament/short season thing to figure that out.

I have some plans for the other titles to save me a bit of work in the updates going forward, but I'll explain those later.

Warm Sarsaparilla

You still out there? The Coburns need a roster.

UltimoDragonQuest
Oct 5, 2011



Pick 'em

Cleveland, Florida, Second City

Ginge
Sep 8, 2011

Well, Chippy is already my favourite character!

BearDrivingTruck posted:

Can I join in Pick 'Em even if I haven't up until now? If so, then Unicorns, Oranges, and Bulldogs.

Sure! (Although you're guaranteed to be last.)

mentholmoose posted:

(Although I think there's no way any other owners can catch up to me, I'll do it anyway)

I've not totalled the scores or anything, but yeah, with your getting the last two Gauntlet rounds right combined with nobody getting any finals series length/score points, no-one can catch you, so congratulations on the sandwich pick.

Monicro
Oct 21, 2010

And you could feel his features in the air
A wide smile and perfect hair
He had complete control of the rising tides
And a medicine bag hanging at his side

In the flowing blue world of the death-dealing physician
Completely loving up my Bobbleheads vs Losers prediction probably doomed my chances at the sandwich pick, but Unicorns, Oranges and Saints to advance.

TKBomber7285
Feb 20, 2011


Apparently, Senerio wants my team to die. Guess that just means I will have to kill his first. I have nothing personal against you. However, after all I risked to have a team in Super-League VII there's no way I can let it die so soon.

C: Ernie Lombardi (1941 Reds)
1B: Mark McGuire (1996 Athletics)
2B: Charlie Gehringer (1931 Tigers)
3B: Jimmy Collins (1902 Americans)
SS: Alan Trammell (1984 Tigers)
LF: Joe Medwick (1935 Cardinals)
CF: Chet Lemon (1984 Tigers)
RF: Frank Robinson (1966 Orioles)
DH: Frank Howard (1965 Senators)

C: Terry Steinbach (1996 Athletics)
OF: Bobby Murcer (1973 Yankees)
OF: Gee Walker (1931 Tigers)
INF: Howard Johnson (1984 Tigers)




SP: Pete Alexander (1928 Cardinals)
SP: Bert Blyleven (1978 Pirates)
SP: Smoky Joe Wood (1921 Indians)
SP: Lefty Gomez (1937 Yankees)
SP: Jack Morris (1984 Tigers)


CL: Kent Tekulve (1978 Pirates)
SU: B.J. Ryan (2006 Blue Jays)
SR: Willie Hernandez (1984 Tigers)
SR: Grant Jackson (1978 Pirates)
MR: Doug Bair (1984 Tigers)
MR: Jim Corsi (1996 Athletics)
LR: Jim Bibby (1978 Pirates)

AAA: Paul Derringer (1941 Reds)


Lineup
CF Chet Lemon
2B Charlie Gehringer
1B Mark McGwire
RF Frank Robinson
LF Joe Medwick
DH Frank Howard
C Ernie Lombardi
3B Jimmie Collins
SS Alan Trammell




Hit and Run: 0
Sacrifice Bunt: -3
Squeeze Play: -4
Trying for extra bases: +1
Stealing Bases: 0
Aggressively Tagging Up: 0
Pitch Outs (to prevent stolen bases): 0
Giving Intentional Walks: -1
Pitching Around Good Hitters: 0
Bringing the Infield In: +1
Guarding the Lines: 0
Making Cutoff Throws: +1
Bringing in Pinch Hitters: +1
Bringing in Pinch Runners: 0
Bringing in Defensive Replacements: +1
Starting Pitchers on Short Rest: -4
Letting pitchers pitch throw trouble: +1
Letting Pitchers rack up high pitch counts: +2

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mentholmoose
Nov 5, 2009

YKNOW THERES ONLY ONE DIRECTION I KNOW AND THATS DRIVIN STRAIGHT TO THE NET

Smasher Dynamo posted:

Yeah, well, in other good news, the live draft is going to start on Monday, after the final Gauntlet update. Hopefully, this will give a me of time off from the thread, so that I can finish the last few obits I need to, as well as prepare for Super-League VIII.

Anyway, since Catalina is going to be bumped from the league, that means that the Spokane Air Raids will have the first selection, so ManifunkDestiny, that's something to keep in mind. I'll think I'll use a twelve-hour clock or so for picks.

A 12 hour window is really long; the draft could take three weeks, and a lot of owners would stop paying attention with that little activity in the thread. Unless you plan on having the clock reset after each pick, which I would strongly recommend.

FWIW, I think this is the updated draft order:

Round 1
1. Spokane (.393)
2. Seattle (.436)
3. Florida (.442)
4. New England (.448)
5. Cuba (.454)
6. Philadelphia (.472)
7. San Juan (.479)
8. Oneida (.506)
9. New Orleans (.515)
10. Wausau (.519)
11. Hartford (.528)
12. Cleveland (.540)
13. Albany (.543)
14. Providence (.546)
15. Web 2.0 (.564) Bid in Superstars auction.
15. Cancun (.636)
Sandwich Round
16. Philadelphia (.472)
Round 2
17. Spokane (.393)
18. Seattle (.436)
19. Florida (.442)
20. New England (.448)
21. Cuba (.454)
22. Philadelphia (.472)
23. San Juan (.479)
24. Oneida (.506)
25. New Orleans (.515)
26. Wausau (.519)
27. Hartford (.528)
28. Cleveland (.540)
29. Albany (.543)
30. Providence (.546)
31. Web 2.0 (.564)
32. Cancun (.636)
Round 3
33. Spokane (.393)
34. Seattle (.436)
35. Florida (.442)
36. New England (.448)
37. Cuba (.454)
38. Philadelphia (.472)
39. San Juan (.479)
40. Oneida (.506)
41. New Orleans (.515) Bid in Superstars auction.
41. Wausau (.519)
42. Hartford (.528)
43. Cleveland (.540)
44. Albany (.543)
45. Providence (.546)
46. Web 2.0 (.564)
47. Cancun (.636)

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