Chili: Vehemently wrong about something stupid.

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Goons with Spoons > Chili: Vehemently wrong about something stupid.

cornface: Dec 28, 2006; by Lowtax

My boss just unloaded a ton of venison and fresh peppers on me, so my next batch is going to be a venison/smoked brisket/smoked pork shoulder combo.

I figure eventually I can just build a ramp up into my pot and lead animals into it two by two like some sort of spicy Noah's ark.

# ? Dec 15, 2012 22:13

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# ? May 16, 2024 20:37

Errant Gin Monks: Oct 2, 2009; "Yeah..."
- Marshawn Lynch

Chili is ready.

Tastes good, nice and spicy, good deer flavor.

# ? Dec 16, 2012 00:31

withak: Jan 15, 2003; Fun Shoe

I made chili in the slow cooker for the first time today. It was way easier than stirring a pot on the stove all day, except I forgot that liquid doesn't cook off in one of these things so I ended up with something closer to spicy soup instead (though without beans). I also may have miscalculated my peppers and spices quantities when scaling down from my usual batch size so it may be unpleasantly spicy.

# ? Dec 16, 2012 07:12

cornface: Dec 28, 2006; by Lowtax

withak posted:

I made chili in the slow cooker for the first time today. It was way easier than stirring a pot on the stove all day, except I forgot that liquid doesn't cook off in one of these things so I ended up with something closer to spicy soup instead (though without beans). I also may have miscalculated my peppers and spices quantities when scaling down from my usual batch size so it may be unpleasantly spicy.

I usually make it in one of those enameled cast iron dutch ovens. Take it off the stove once it is mixed and bubbling and just toss it in the oven at 300 for three hours and it is good to go.

Check the liquid, the spice, and the meat at the halfway point and give it a stir. Doesn't require a lot of tending to and reduces the chance of ending up with soup, over spicing, or mush.

# ? Dec 16, 2012 07:29

Aramoro: Jun 1, 2012

cornface posted:

I usually make it in one of those enameled cast iron dutch ovens. Take it off the stove once it is mixed and bubbling and just toss it in the oven at 300 for three hours and it is good to go.

Check the liquid, the spice, and the meat at the halfway point and give it a stir. Doesn't require a lot of tending to and reduces the chance of ending up with soup, over spicing, or mush.

Thats what I make my chilli in. Made a half and half pork/beef chilli the other day, 3 hours in the oven and then onto the hob to reduce it. Came out nice.

# ? Dec 17, 2012 15:37

corgski: Feb 6, 2007; Silly goose, you're here forever.

So, this time I just threw a whole roast into the pot and let it simmer for six hours. I'm in love.

# ? Dec 29, 2012 11:23

ninjahedgehog: Feb 17, 2011; It's time to kick the tires and light the fires, Big Bird.

Doom Rooster posted:

Resurrecting this from my NICSA entry.

Chipotle and Chocolate Chili

Ingredients:

5 lbs trimmed and cubed Chuck
1 lb Spicy Breakfast Sausage (Owens is the best. Jimmy Dean sucks)
2 Medium Onions, minced
5 Cloves of Garlic, minced
1 bottle Double Chocolate Stout
3 oz Bourbon
32 oz Beef Broth
3.5 oz Chipotle In Adobo
9 Tbsp Chili Powder (Details below)
1 Tbsp Black Pepper
Salt to Taste

First off, you are going to want to brown your meat a little bit. I do this in two pans simultaneously, because otherwise it would take forever. IMPORTANT: You do not want to actually cook the meat through here at all. If you cook the meat to done now, it will be dry and tough in the final product. I find that thoroughly browning one side is the best that I can do without cooking the meat beyond medium rarish. Rocket hot pan with a little bit beef fat rendered out from the Chuck trimmings.

This is what you should be aiming for.

Once you reach this, put this batch of beef into a holding bowl, and start the next batch. Once all of the beef is done, brown the sausage. Really BROWN it. Don't just cook it through. You want some nice roasty brown color on there. Like this:

Put the sausage into the holding bowl with the beef. Drain about half of the fat off first.

After all this is done, deglaze the skillet with the bourbon!

In the pot, the moisture from the onions(which you should add now) will be more than enough to get all the fond off of the bottom. If you are using one pan, go ahead and deglaze that pan with the bourbon, then add the onion to it.

Sweat the onions on medium heat until they are completely translucent, then add the garlic and cook for another 2-3 minutes. You don't want to caramelize the onions, just cook them through(the color you see in the picture is from the beef bits left in the pan, not from caramelized onion).

While your onions are sweating, you want to toast your chili powder. Chili powder is incredibly important (you would think that this would be obvious). My particular blend this go 'round is equal parts Durango, Ancho, San Antonio Red, and Dried Chipotle. If you happen to have a great place that has a great variety of dried chilies, then awesome, grinding your own is really good, and dirt cheap. If you do not, or you are lazy, there really is no shame in buying chili powder mixes from elsewhere, just buy small quantities that you know that you will go through quickly, so it will be reasonably fresh.

Even if your chilies have been toasted prior to blending, you are going to want to take your finished powder and toss it into a small pan over medium heat. You want to stir this regularly until the smell of chili punches you in the face, but before the burning smell. Friends always ask me how they will know that they have reached this point, and I always just respond with "trust me, you will know". Your kitchen will go from "Hmmm, I think that I can smell chili powder" to "Holy poo poo that smells amazing" within a few seconds.

After you are done toasting it, set it aside until your onions and garlic are done are done. Once they are, add all of your chili powder and stir it into a paste, then add all of your meat and the juice in the bowl back to the pot and stir it all up. It is likely that enough liquid came out of the beef while it was holding that a decent sauce has been created in the pot.

Because I didn't remember to put them into the main ingredients picture, here are the chipotles that I use, and how finely minced you want them.

You want to turn these bad boys into a paste.

Add all of these to the pot as well, including the excess adobo from the can. You can leave the adobo out to cut down a little on the spice. If you want to cut down on the spice further still, leave out half of the Chiptole. If you really want to cut down on the spice, don't eat chili, or grow pair of testicles and eat it anyway.

It should now look like this!

Then go ahead and stir in your stout!

At this point, you will want to stir in your broth. Now comes the slightly tricky part. You want the heat to be at just the right spot. You are looking for a very, very bare simmer. If you can get it, you want one, tiny line of bubbles breaking the surface of your chili. Be very careful on this, as if you ever get the mix to a full boil, or close to it, your meat is going to get stringy and tough.

Seriously, start your stove on the lowest setting, and come back in 30 minutes. If no bubbles at all are breaking the surface, turn it up a tiny bit and come back in 10 minutes. Repeat this until you get the right temperature.

You want to cook the chili uncovered, so that moisture evaporates, and your chili thickens/intensifies in flavor. You should stir this once every 30 minutes or so once you have found the perfect stove setting. Continue this until it is done, which is when it is very thick, and the meat is tender and falling apart when lightly pressured.

1 hour in.

4 hours in.

6 hours in.

6 1/2 hours in, and ready to eat.

Put that in your mouth.

The spice of this blend, and the additional chipotle is a very soft heat, that takes a while to build up. It is a very pleasant warming sensation that starts creeping from the tip of your tongue all the way to the back of your throat over the duration of the bowl. I think that the flavor of the chili is spot on at this point, so I wouldn't really add anything else, however if you want more heat, do what I do. Add this stuff: http://www.amazon.com/Pure-Cap-2-oz/dp/B0007MXR92

It is flavorless, but 500,000 scoville units. I loving love this stuff for any application where I want more heat without affecting the overall flavor profile of the dish.

Planning on making this tomorrow. Would this work by putting it in a slow cooker for the last six and a half hours, instead of futzing about with the pot temperature?

# ? Jan 2, 2013 03:07

Doom Rooster: Sep 3, 2008; Pillbug

ninjahedgehog posted:

Planning on making this tomorrow. Would this work by putting it in a slow cooker for the last six and a half hours, instead of futzing about with the pot temperature?

Definitely. I would probably crack the lid so that moisture can escape, and thicken up though.

# ? Jan 2, 2013 03:29

Studebaker Hawk: May 22, 2004

I made a non-traditional chili yesterday:

Eyeballed spice rub consisting of smoked/sweet paprika, freshly ground coriander and cumin, oregano, cilantro, salt, pepper, 2 tsp. freshly ground dark coffee, 1 tsp. unsweetend cacao, cayenne, ancho.

-Seared off a couple pounds of brisket.
-Re-hydrated some ancho and guajillo chili in 1 tbsp bourbon and a bit of water
-Deglazed the pan with 8 tbsp. of BCBS (Bourbon Country Brand Stout) beer
-Onions, garlic, red, pepper and green/yellow squash
-16 oz crushed marzano tomato, 8oz fire roasted tomato
-Large can of hominy
-Braised the brisket in the result for 2.5 hours
-Added in Kidney/Red beans and brought back up to temp.

Delicious- first time using coffee/cacao in my chili and it added a wonderful depth. BCBS is an expensive chili beer but goddamn if it isn't worth it.

# ? Jan 3, 2013 17:40

WaterIsPoison: Nov 5, 2009

Apartment complex is hosting a "chili cookoff" at the end of the month. Not sure if it's worth the possible $50 off rent only loose to a canned chili with beans :razz:

# ? Jan 4, 2013 22:28

Choadmaster: Oct 7, 2004; I don't care how snug they fit, you're nuts!

So I cleaned out my refrigerator and freezers the other day, and this resulted in digging up a bunch of old frozen meat that really needed to be put to use: 1.5-2 lbs of pulled pork I'd smoked months ago, 3 pounds of ground beef hamburger patties I never use (I make my burgers fresh so why do I buy these?? :cry:

), and a 5-6 lb beef brisket I was planning on making beef jerky with like 6 months ago and never did. What to do with a bunch of random meat? Chili!

Also in the freezers I found a 1 lb package of Smart Ground and 4 lb package of Gardein "ground beef." What to do with a bunch of random fake meat? Vegetarian chili! I know a lot of vegetarians, including one of the kids in my friend's family who I was planning on eating the meat chili with, so why not?

All my measurements are guesses because I don't actually measure poo poo. Sorry, mostly iPhone shots as I don't like to use the DSLR while cooking.

Step 1: Powder

I made the powder in two parts, a fairly mild base and an additional spicy enhancement. This makes it easy to control the spice levels for different people while still having tasty loving chili regardless.

Mild base: Roughly equal parts Guajillo, Ancho, Pasilla, California, and New Mexico peppers. Before the final grind I also tossed in some smoked paprika (1 tsp) and tumeric (1/4 tsp), and whole cumin (1/2 tsp), coriander (1/4 tsp), cardamom (1/4 tsp), and black peppercorns (1/4 tsp).

Spicy: Brown Chipotle, Chipotle, Arbol, and Puya peppers.

I also ground a separate batch of seasoning containing additional stuff I didn't want to put (too much of) in the chili powder itself. This consisted of a shitload more cumin (2 tbsp), coriander (1 tsp), cardamom (1/4 tsp), black pepper (1 tsp), salt (1 tsp), and a sprinkling of thyme, sage, and rosemary. (Most of it is already used up in the picture)

Step 2: Smokin'

In addition to the meat, I had three fresh Anaheim peppers, three fresh Pasilla peppers, three onions, ten cloves of garlic, half an eggplant, and a few chunks of tofu to smoke (no spicier peppers unfortunately since some of my eaters can't handle it). Also going into the chili, but not smoked, were two bunches of cilantro. I used a mix of mesquite and apple wood for the smoke.

Smoked veggies went into the vegetarian pot (small) and carnivorian pot (large) in about a 2-to-3 ratio, but then the veggie pot also got the eggplant.

Smoked meats all went into the meat pot, obviously. I sliced up the burger patties into small cubes and tossed them right in; the cubed-up brisket needed a second round of browning though. At the end, the pan was deglazed with Jack Daniels and dumped into the meat pot.

Step 3: AllTheRestOfWhateverGoesIntoChili

I dumped the 5 lbs of fake-ground-beef into the veggie pot along with the smoked tofu (now cubed), a quarter cup of dried, crumbled portobello mushrooms, and half a soy chorizo sausage. Yes, I'm sure that's not enough chorizo for most of you. I don't like chorizo much. In addition to the burger patties and brisket, I added to the meat pot my smoked pulled pork and the other half of the soyrizo (go ahead pretend I used lots of real chorizo).

For base liquids, I added 1 beer and 1 qt vegetable stock to the veggie pot, and 1 beer, 1 qt beef stock, and 1 qt chicken stock to the meat pot.

To each pot I added 29 oz (2 cans) diced tomatoes and 6 oz (mini can) tomato paste (yeah, this was worse than the chorizo thing. Be glad it wasn't beans! :arghfist:

).

Then to each pot I added 1/4 cup Worcestershire sauce (vegetarian Worcestershire in the veggie pot, normal Worcestershire in the other), 2 tbsp apple cider vinegar, 2 tbsp soy sauce, and 2 tbsp Golden Mountain seasoning. The meat pot got an additional 1 tbsp fish sauce.

I put brown sugar (~1/4 cup), cinnamon (~1 tbsp), mild chili powder base (~3 to 4 tbsp), and the seasoning mix I made earlier (~2 tbsp) into each pot, but I put less in the veggie pot than the meat pot (in about a 2-to-3 ratio again). I added 1/4 tsp of the spicy chili powder and an equal amount of chipotles in adobo sauce to the meat pot and a full teaspoon of each into the vegetarian pot.

I also dropped one square (1/2 oz) of dark baker's chocolate into each pot. I've never tried chocolate before so I didn't want to put in too much but I probably could have put in one or two more.

Step 4: Waiting

I let them simmer for 7 hours. This probably wasn't necessary with the vegetarian pot, but whatever. For the meat pot, at about the 6 hour mark I separated out about 1/3 of it into another pot and added more spicy chili powder and chipotles in adobo sauce to make a spicier version for myself an the couple other people who like it that way.

Veggie pot (took a bit out near the end for a cilantro-hating friend and then put the cilantro in, hence the low level and green leafy bits):

Meat pot:

Step 5: Eating

Verdict: Delicious. Everyone loved it, and the spice levels of the mild version were just right for those who wanted it that way (not bland but not painful). I hould have made the spicy version just a bit spicier though. It was very smoky, but not too smoky. Possibly a tiny bit too sweet (less brown sugar next time), but not enough to detract from the deliciousness. The vegetarian chili was a reasonable approximation of the meat chili, but I'm going to leave the tofu out next time. I added it in an attempt to add one more thing to the veggie chili that could be smoked, but it wasn't necessary. It looks/feels a bit out of place.

I should note that when I make thick meaty chili like this I do get comments like "this is chili? It looks more like pulled beef..." always followed by ".. but it's loving delicious!" :shrug:

And yes, I did forget to toast my chili powder in a pan before dumping it into the pot. :smith:

On top of nachos with sour cream, as it should be.

Choadmaster fucked around with this message at 10:42 on Jan 6, 2013

# ? Jan 6, 2013 10:19

Martello: Apr 29, 2012; by XyloJW

Just caught up on this awesome thread.

Right now I'm in a place where I can't even buy food let alone cook (Army training :mil101:

) but when I get back home next Saturday I'm gonna be a chili-cookin fool. I have a pig heart and liver from a hand-raised pig ( :smug:

) that I'm thinking might be good in chili. I saw hearts recommended earlier so I'm not really worried about that, but how about the liver? I've used chicken livers in bolognese before and it was awesome, but I've never had pig's liver and I'm not sure how it will taste.

Also how do you guys feel about finishing chili in a crock-pot? I'd do all the browning and spice toasting and whatnot on the stovetop in a cast-iron pan first of course.

# ? Jan 27, 2013 03:37

cornface: Dec 28, 2006; by Lowtax

Martello posted:

Also how do you guys feel about finishing chili in a crock-pot? I'd do all the browning and spice toasting and whatnot on the stovetop in a cast-iron pan first of course.

It works fine. The only downside over using enameled cast iron in the oven is that you have less control over the temperature. Just pop the lid off and stir it and give it a look every hour or so and you'll be good to go.

# ? Jan 27, 2013 04:02

dis astranagant: Dec 14, 2006

How do you get it to reduce in a crockpot? One would think that the covered pot would keep most of the moisture in.

# ? Jan 27, 2013 04:09

cornface: Dec 28, 2006; by Lowtax

dis astranagant posted:

How do you get it to reduce in a crockpot? One would think that the covered pot would keep most of the moisture in.

I leave a lid on it when I do it in the oven, too.

The secret is not making watery chili to start out with...

# ? Jan 27, 2013 04:30

dis astranagant: Dec 14, 2006

I wouldn't exactly call a half gallon of stock to 8 pounds of meat "watery" but it still winds up taking 6-8 hours to cook down on the stovetop without a lid.

# ? Jan 27, 2013 04:55

Martello: Apr 29, 2012; by XyloJW

I made some sort of chili-like substance in the Crock-Pot using taco meat that was way too spicy (Blair's Ultra Death :supaburn:

) and like tomatoes and onions and beans and maybe a few other things. I added a few pounds more meat to counteract the spicy, I think I ended up with a crazy mix of bison, beef, pork, and veal or something. It wasn't very watery to begin with because I didn't dump in the tomato juice from the can, and it reduced beautifully even with the lid on the whole time.

It also tasted really good even though it wasn't the kind of elite chili you guys have been making and what I'm gonna try for when I get back.

# ? Jan 27, 2013 05:00

withak: Jan 15, 2003; Fun Shoe

dis astranagant posted:

How do you get it to reduce in a crockpot? One would think that the covered pot would keep most of the moisture in.

You just have to make sure not to overdo it on the liquids at the start. The consistency that it is when you turn the crock pot on is the same it will be when it is done. You can crack the lid for a while and it will reduce a tiny bit if necessary.

# ? Jan 27, 2013 05:24

cornface: Dec 28, 2006; by Lowtax

dis astranagant posted:

I wouldn't exactly call a half gallon of stock to 8 pounds of meat "watery" but it still winds up taking 6-8 hours to cook down on the stovetop without a lid.

I don't know. The only liquid I usually put in is water that snuck into the food processor from the peppers, the liquid in a can of tomatoes, and maybe half a cup of beer or broth to deglaze the meat pan. If it looks like it isn't juicy enough I'll dump in another half cup from the pepper pot. I usually use about 3-4 lbs of meat. (generally 3lbs of some sort of cubed sirloin or chunked brisket and another 1 lb or so of "filler" meat. Either shredded pork or ground beef/venison/chorizo/whatever).

It is possible I just make chili weird. I'd be interested in seeing some pictures of what yours looks like going in and when it is done.

Going to do another smoked brisket/pork shoulder/venison batch in a couple of weeks. I'll make it in a crockpot...for science.

# ? Jan 27, 2013 05:57

Kenning: Jan 11, 2009; I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.

dis astranagant posted:

How do you get it to reduce in a crockpot? One would think that the covered pot would keep most of the moisture in.

I put too much liquid in my crock pot chili a couple days ago and I ended up having to transfer it to a stovetop pot to reduce for an hour or so. That plus some masa harina tossed in did the trick. Masa is amazing for thickening up a stubborn chili.

# ? Jan 27, 2013 13:24

dis astranagant: Dec 14, 2006

cornface posted:

I don't know. The only liquid I usually put in is water that snuck into the food processor from the peppers, the liquid in a can of tomatoes, and maybe half a cup of beer or broth to deglaze the meat pan. If it looks like it isn't juicy enough I'll dump in another half cup from the pepper pot. I usually use about 3-4 lbs of meat. (generally 3lbs of some sort of cubed sirloin or chunked brisket and another 1 lb or so of "filler" meat. Either shredded pork or ground beef/venison/chorizo/whatever).

It is possible I just make chili weird. I'd be interested in seeing some pictures of what yours looks like going in and when it is done.

Going to do another smoked brisket/pork shoulder/venison batch in a couple of weeks. I'll make it in a crockpot...for science.

I couldn't find my camera last time I made a batch so no pictures but it starts as cubes of meat with chopped up peppers and garlic in barely enough liquid to be able to stir and ends up about like pulled pork. Probably a little thicker than my crockpot pulled pork, actually.

# ? Jan 27, 2013 14:27

EVG: Dec 17, 2005; If I Saw It, Here's How It Happened.

Posted in the general questions thread but didn't get any response. I have a fully cooked smoked beef brisket, about 6lbs, that I'd like to turn at least some of into chili. I only know how to cook chili from a recipe and I don't have any brisket chili recipes! Anyone have a recipe I can use?

# ? Jan 27, 2013 17:05

The Midniter: Jul 9, 2001

EVG posted:

Posted in the general questions thread but didn't get any response. I have a fully cooked smoked beef brisket, about 6lbs, that I'd like to turn at least some of into chili. I only know how to cook chili from a recipe and I don't have any brisket chili recipes! Anyone have a recipe I can use?

If the brisket is already cooked, I'm thinking you could just cook any chili recipe in this thread, but without any meat, then chop up the meat (trim any excess fat so it doesn't get too greasy) and add it at the end to heat through. It's already fully cooked so you wouldn't want to cook it again and turn it into beef sawdust.

# ? Jan 27, 2013 21:17

EVG: Dec 17, 2005; If I Saw It, Here's How It Happened.

Thanks! Without reading all 17 pages, is there a specific tried-n-true recipe from the thread that people are going back to?

# ? Jan 27, 2013 21:58

The Midniter: Jul 9, 2001

EVG posted:

Thanks! Without reading all 17 pages, is there a specific tried-n-true recipe from the thread that people are going back to?

Not really...there are so many variations that I couldn't suggest one over the other because I don't know your preferences - beans? No beans? Tomatoes? Chili purist?

It's only 17 pages, I recommend reading through and seeing what catches your eye. Plus, this will set you up with a foundation for any future chilis you make!

# ? Jan 27, 2013 22:11

cornface: Dec 28, 2006; by Lowtax

The Midniter posted:

If the brisket is already cooked, I'm thinking you could just cook any chili recipe in this thread, but without any meat, then chop up the meat (trim any excess fat so it doesn't get too greasy) and add it at the end to heat through. It's already fully cooked so you wouldn't want to cook it again and turn it into beef sawdust.

It actually works fine to just dice it up and cook as normal. I would recommend using another ground or shredded meat to fill it out, though. Pulled pork or ground sirloin or something like that in about a 1 to 3 ratio with the brisket.

# ? Jan 27, 2013 23:57

rj54x: Sep 16, 2007

So, the work chili cookoff is this Friday. I've done a Texas red the last few years, but I'd like to do a chili verde this year. I know the basics - tomatillos, a nice pork shoulder - but does anybody have any particular recommendations?

# ? Jan 28, 2013 03:34

Beer4TheBeerGod: Aug 23, 2004; Exciting Lemon

So what are the differences between using your own chili powder as opposed to the paste made from dried chilies? I've always done powder but I am curious about this alternative.

# ? Jan 28, 2013 05:06

Syenite: Jun 21, 2011; Grimey Drawer

Beer4TheBeerGod posted:

So what are the differences between using your own chili powder as opposed to the paste made from dried chilies? I've always done powder but I am curious about this alternative.

I'm curious about this as well, what kind of flavor difference is there from ground chili powder vs. chili "paste"?

Syenite fucked around with this message at 05:17 on Jan 28, 2013

# ? Jan 28, 2013 05:15

physeter: Jan 24, 2006; high five, more dead than alive

Shukaro posted:

I'm curious about this as well, what kind of flavor difference is there from ground chili powder vs. chili "paste"?

It's a much more complex taste with respect to the chili itself, meaning the plant, not the overall dish. You will taste actual CHILI in your chili, as opposed to just having some chili that tastes like chili. It becomes an ingredient proper rather than a seasoning. I prefer it a great deal, but it can mean sacrificing the complexity of a good powdered blend for one very powerful note. My opinion anyway. Also the coloration of the dish is often superior, anchos is particular will turn everything into a deep, rich mohagany that I really like.

physeter fucked around with this message at 20:56 on Jan 29, 2013

# ? Jan 29, 2013 19:46

door.jar: Mar 17, 2010

I made my first batch of "real" chili using the various peppers I can get in New Zealand and beef rump, it came out amazing but not very hot at all. The next week I spotted a type of chili pepper I've never seen before, they were labelled only "EXTRA HOT chilies". So what exactly did I buy?

All I know is the label wasn't kidding, I added one to a serving of chili I had reheated and somewhat regretted it.

door.jar fucked around with this message at 04:27 on Jan 31, 2013

# ? Jan 31, 2013 04:25

dis astranagant: Dec 14, 2006

Looks habanero or scotch bonnet-ish.

# ? Jan 31, 2013 04:29

angerbot: Mar 23, 2004; plob

I would say scotch bonnet and yeah, don't let the cute lil' pepper fool you, it's spicy. Wear gloves or wash your hands very well after handling one.

# ? Jan 31, 2013 05:57

cornface: Dec 28, 2006; by Lowtax

angerbot posted:

I would say scotch bonnet and yeah, don't let the cute lil' pepper fool you, it's spicy. Wear gloves or wash your hands very well after handling one.

Wear gloves because soap has basically no effect on the horrors that await you if you chop them barehanded.

# ? Jan 31, 2013 06:23

Kenning: Jan 11, 2009; I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.

Yeah see, I would use 5-6 of those in an entire batch of chili (say, 5 pounds of meat), along with a few lesser peppers. I wouldn't just chop one up and add it to a single serving hahah.

# ? Jan 31, 2013 06:41

mindphlux: Jan 8, 2004; by R. Guyovich

EVG posted:

Thanks! Without reading all 17 pages, is there a specific tried-n-true recipe from the thread that people are going back to?

I was in a similar situation a while ago, I had a bunch of left over smoked pork shoulder that I knew I'd never eat, so I decided to turn it into chili.

I caramelized a heaping fuckload of onions, added tons of homemade chili powder and garlic to the oily onion mess, fried that off for a minute, dumped in all my chopped leftover meat, added a ton of paprika, cayenne, and a little extra cumin. dropped a chipolte in adobo in the hatch, about 2 cups stock, a beer, and let it simmer. adjusted salt pepper and sugar to taste, and that's pretty much it. chili of champs.

# ? Jan 31, 2013 10:10

niss: Jul 9, 2008; the amazing gnome

cornface posted:

Wear gloves because soap has basically no effect on the horrors that await you if you chop them barehanded.

I've never understood this, I chop them gloveless all the time. Last time I made chili I put like 15 of them in seeds and all and I didn't think it was really all that hot. Unless I am just getting lame ones from my local market. Sure if I touch my eye its gonna burn, but I've never felt the slightest bit of discomfort on my hands.

I might just be crazy though as I use hot sauce on my salads in place of normal salad dressing. So who knows.

niss fucked around with this message at 13:43 on Jan 31, 2013

# ? Jan 31, 2013 13:41

Kenning: Jan 11, 2009; I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.

My hands dry out and crack easily due to some lovely eczema or something and the last time I chopped up a bunch of chiles without gloves on the juice soaked into the cracks and it was seriously one of the worst nights I've ever spent. I tried every folk remedy in the book � soap, milk, whiskey, vinegar, olive oil � but nothing got rid of the burning for more than a few seconds. Falling asleep for the evening when your hand feels like it's resting on a bed of coals is pretty difficult.

# ? Jan 31, 2013 14:00

niss: Jul 9, 2008; the amazing gnome

Kenning posted:

My hands dry out and crack easily due to some lovely eczema or something and the last time I chopped up a bunch of chiles without gloves on the juice soaked into the cracks and it was seriously one of the worst nights I've ever spent. I tried every folk remedy in the book � soap, milk, whiskey, vinegar, olive oil � but nothing got rid of the burning for more than a few seconds. Falling asleep for the evening when your hand feels like it's resting on a bed of coals is pretty difficult.

Ouch that sucks. Maybe I should be slightly more careful in the future.

# ? Jan 31, 2013 14:08

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# ? May 16, 2024 20:37

Aramoro: Jun 1, 2012

niss posted:

I've never understood this, I chop them gloveless all the time. Last time I made chili I put like 15 of them in seeds and all and I didn't think it was really all that hot. Unless I am just getting lame ones from my local market. Sure if I touch my eye its gonna burn, but I've never felt the slightest bit of discomfort on my hands.

I might just be crazy though as I use hot sauce on my salads in place of normal salad dressing. So who knows.

If you're throwing 15 Scotch Bonnets in your chilli then I'm going to go ahead and say your taste buds are broken and you have some sort of nerve damage in your mouth. Scotch Bonnets are 40 times hotter than jalape�os.

You wont generally feel anything on your hands, the point is it's very hard to wash off. So you cut them up and wash your hands then half an hour later you wipe your eye and set it on fire by mistake.

# ? Jan 31, 2013 15:06

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Goons with Spoons > Chili: Vehemently wrong about something stupid.

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