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The best puns are the cheesy ones. 
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Dec 10, 2012 07:42
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His character in our 4e game is a gnome bard named Thrumpsfullience Bumpscullience, so yeah he's a goof.
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Dec 10, 2012 07:55
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Colon V posted:The best puns are the cheesy ones. I have a friend who made a Hanging Judge character for a Deadlands-ish game called Travis T. O'Justice.
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Dec 11, 2012 02:30
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GimpInBlack posted:Go to RPG.net, search for Broken Diamond, Soul Cage, and The Man Comes Around, in that order. Oh man. Thanks. These were great.
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Dec 11, 2012 03:43
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Colon V posted:The best puns are the cheesy ones. Friend: What does the law say about possession? I'm not entierly sure. Me: Well you do know that possession is nine tenths of the law. 
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Dec 11, 2012 03:48
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I'm not sure if this qualifies as a best or worst, but I still can't believe it happened. There was a guy who was in my group for a few months, UC Berkeley student, stereotypical nerd (the bad kind) and extremely socially awkward. I was convinced he either had Asperger's or some sort of ASD. Things were going well for a few months, he was there every Wednesday. One day he didn't come. Soon after my DM got this emailquote:On that note, I have unfortunate news. Due to an error on my part, my mom found out about my gaming. Although I have finally managed to demonstrate that I am learning to balance gaming and life, the fact that I was covering up about it has come around to bite me in the rear end. As such, while I have earned the right to game openly in the future, my punishment for lying to my family about my activities has resulted in my getting a year long ban from gaming. Since they pay the bills, they get a say in my life. I regret to inform you that I will have to withdraw from the group. It has been my honor and pleasure to game with all of you for the past year, and I can say without reserve that you all were the best group I have ever gamed with. I bid you best wishes in deposing the Queen and hope to someday be able to game with you again. It turns out that he had been flunked out of UC Berkeley because he was gaming too much, and was let in under academic probation. He was lying to his parents for months, saying that he was attending a "study group." He got caught, and his parents banned him from gaming for a year, and I haven't seen him since.
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Dec 12, 2012 00:51
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So I'm currently GMing a campaign based on space-archaeology and mystery solving, where the three-man party (Assassin, detective, scientist) works for an agency investigating alien ruins and unexplained mysteries. The first adventure involved investigating a live-flesh replicating operation where the perp was seducing young women and using them as "raw material" in his attempts to resurrect his dead parents. The agency got reports that feral dogs had been showing up on the space station near his private habitat (His failed experiments) and, after some digging, the party traced them back to him and found out where he lived. They dropped in for a visit and walked in on him dissecting the still-living Jennifer Carmichael, daughter of a rich interstellar property tycoon. The party's stealthy assassin snuck up behind the lunatic and stun-gunned him -- but not before he put the habitat into freefall towards Earth. The assassin grabbed the nutjob and the detective grabbed Jennifer, and they started to make their way out of the habitat and into their shuttle. Meanwhile, the party's scientist made a beeline for the habitat controls and maintenance, where he tried to restart the engines and restore its orbit. But he only succeeded halfway, and put the station into a spin -- making it harder for the other two to navigate. The assassin made some good rolls and lucky maneuvers, but the detective (Who is not terribly strong or agile) was in trouble. He couldn't handle his own weight AND the girl. So he cut her throat with a glass shard (merciful death I guess?) and left on his own. Mission successful, lunatic apprehended, end of story -- though Mr Carmichael is understandably very very upset that the detective slashed his daughter's throat and left her to die (The detective's headset got it all on video). Cut to several adventures later. They're on a luxury starship cruise investigating a faith healer. A beautiful woman comes up to the scientist and starts making small talk. He invites her back to his room for drinks and conversation (He hasn't asked her name yet). They get back to his room, and his player looks down at his inventory sheet, then at me -- "I brought two syringes of that hallucinogen (From a prior adventure) with me. I inject her with both". He succeeds, and she trips her loving balls off before suffering a brain aneurysm and dying. The guy playing the scientist is a bit weird, and always a hoot to play with. So he checks her pockets, finds her ID card, and freaks out. She's the wife of Mr Carmichael. I'd put the couple on the cruise as an interesting social encounter, and he had murdered her in the first 20 minutes of the adventure. So Mr Carmichael has sold his land, hired a small army, and is ought for revenge. My players created a Big Bad without even meaning to. I love it when that happens.
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Dec 17, 2012 03:43
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Xaander posted:So I'm currently GMing a campaign based on space-archaeology and mystery solving, where the three-man party (Assassin, detective, scientist) works for an agency investigating alien ruins and unexplained mysteries. Considering that your scientist guy is a murderer, and the detective isn't that much better, I'd say it's more that your big bad is out for justice.
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Dec 17, 2012 04:13
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klosterdev posted:I'm not sure if this qualifies as a best or worst, but I still can't believe it happened. There was a guy who was in my group for a few months, UC Berkeley student, stereotypical nerd (the bad kind) and extremely socially awkward. I was convinced he either had Asperger's or some sort of ASD. Things were going well for a few months, he was there every Wednesday. One day he didn't come. Soon after my DM got this email Jesus without knowing the details that just sounds depressing. He seems polite enough, albeit awkward. He probably legitimately struggled to balance responsibility and recreation. Poor guy just wanted to game. 
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Dec 17, 2012 04:30
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Volmarias posted:Considering that your scientist guy is a murderer, and the detective isn't that much better, I'd say it's more that your big bad is out for justice. Yeah. Horrible murdering psychopath, even. I demand you make your Carmichael character wear some kind of SFnal bat suit.
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Dec 17, 2012 05:02
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sebmojo posted:Yeah. Horrible murdering psychopath, even. I demand you make your Carmichael character wear some kind of SFnal bat suit. That's actually kinda the plan, and he's now one of the factions/people fighting for control of the super-advanced alien technology the party is chasing down -- in order to become a superhero of sorts and protect other people from having this happen to them. I'm excited to see how the party deals with him in the final confrontation, and whether they'll see his reasoning or gun him down like the rest of his family.
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Dec 17, 2012 05:51
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They're PC's. And they're PC's that 'mercy-killed' (for convenience) his daughter, and for no apparent reason randomly drugged and killed his wife. I'm sort of thinking this is a foregone conclusion.
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Dec 17, 2012 07:19
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Shady Amish Terror posted:They're PC's. And they're PC's that 'mercy-killed' (for convenience) his daughter, and for no apparent reason randomly drugged and killed his wife. It's times like these that I remember that the best description of PCs in most games is "murder hobos"
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Dec 17, 2012 13:56
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Had another solid session with my D&D group earlier this week. I did a brief write up previously on one of the sessions that we did, but it was incredibly long and I lost interest after a bit. Plus, in hindsight, it wasn't as good as I remembered outside of a couple of choice bits. This time, however, I can't not write about it. -- Our party, consisting of Venora, the Luck based Spellthief (played by myself), Rufus, a Warmage from a Warband worshiping Copper Dragons, and Halen, the Warlock, had found themselves in a lost city, called Arkalon. This city, according to legends, was the last known resting spot of Bahamut's Charm. Bahamut's Charm is the good counterpart to an evil charm Tiamat had made, simply known as the Dragonhead Charm. We had managed to steal the Dragonhead Charm away from multiple Big Bads of the campaign, but they were hot on our tail, desperate to get it back. The city itself had once been a utopia, using Bahamut's Charm to bring good to all who resided in it. However, once the king had learned of the Dragonhead's Charm, he locked away Bahamut's, and began to rule the city with an iron fist. We had found ourselves in league with a small group of clerics who wanted to usurp the king and bring back true peace once more. We struck a deal with them that we would help with their plan to steal the Charm and establish a new rule in the city, but in exchange, we would be allowed to have the Charm for an unspecified amount of time. Reluctantly, they agreed, and this is where our session started. We quickly decided that the Charm was probably located within the castle somewhere, maybe even the throne room itself. One of the clerics was going to come with us, as he knew of secret passages within the castle we could use, while the rest were going to infiltrate a separate location that they believed the Charm could be at. Rufus chimed in that he had a plan. Since he had previously attempted to make nice with the castle guards (and failed spectacularly), he suggested that he could run a distraction in the castle while Halen and I snuck in through the sewers. It seemed simple enough to work, so we ran with it. We broke off, and Rufus quickly made his way to the castle gates. Greeting the now pissed off guard, he bluffed that he had lost his materials pouch in the castle from one of his previous visits, and it was imperative that he get it back. Through gritted teeth, the guard agreed to escort him through the castle. The rest of the party quickly made their way through the sewers. However, one of the enemies we had made throughout the campaign was a master illusionist who took the form of a little girl. Her name was Mary, and she had a habit of chiming in at the worst possible times with her shrill laugh, just before something horrible happened. Sure enough, her laugh echoed through the sewers, and we found ourselves facing ourselves. Three of us, actually, flanked from both sides in the narrow sewer. This was her big trick: making exact copies of ourselves that want to kill us. And I mean exact. Same abilities, same HP, same AC, and they love to use our own strategies against us. It also leads to a lot of silly jokes about us hitting ourselves. In this case, the spellthieves started stealing healing and buff spells from our cleric, while the warlock clones pulled out Halen's most annoying trick in the book: making silent image clones. Halen, thinking on his feet, pulled out one of his arrows of Darkness to blind everyone. I would position myself behind one of the evil 'me's, and when I called out, he put his hand over the arrow, so I could sneak attack myself for massive damage. The DM also ruled that, since in the description for a sneak attack it mentions “discerning anatomy”, sneak attacks can only be done when you're not blind. While this put a muzzle on the spellthieves in one aspect, but this didn't stop them from having the best luck in the world, regardless of rerolls. The spellthief clones crit multiple times throughout the combat, with dice rolled out in the open. In the mean time, Halen's clones had been making clones upon clones upon clones, quickly turning the already cramped sewers into something resembling the Matrix Reloaded with Agent Smith in the backdoors. This analogy was only reinforced when our Cleric used a feat of strength to kick one of the wounded spellthieves into the group of clones, knocking them down like dominoes. It became a war of attrition, and after expending nearly all of the cleric's spells and all of my luck rerolls, we managed to clear them out. After we stopped briefly to rest, we made haste to the secret passage into the castle. The secret passage, as we found out, was incredibly old, rusted, obvious and very very LOUD. It actually lead to one of the first floor bathrooms of the castle, and lifted the toilet itself up in the stall. We opened the passage just as Rufus and his guard were walking nearby in their fruitless search. Alerted by the noise, they decided to investigate. Inside, Halen used invisibility, while me and the Cleric hid. Halen made a silent image of a nasty brown liquid leaking out of one of the other stalls. This caused the guard to go find one of the maintenance staff in the castle, while prompting Rufus to stay put until he got back. Rufus, however, decided to take it a step further. Kicking open the door to the stall with the illusion, he cast Evard's Black Tentacles into the toilet bowl, and yelled out of the bathroom door for help. Guards quickly came to his aid: Guard: What's happening? What's going on? Rufus: There's a monster erupting from the toilet! It's trying to invade the castle! *rolls high bluff* Guards: Oh my god, kill it! The guards quickly start attempting to lay into the “toilet monster”, while Halen helped the illusion by making the guards strikes seem like they were damaging it, but it was quickly regenerating. One of the guards yelled about finding the king, and darted out of the bathroom. I took the opportunity to sneak out with the Cleric, and followed closely behind. Sure enough, he lead us right to the throne room, and after sneaking past a couple other guards, and sapping and tying up one, the throne room was vacated, and ripe for a search. After a tense couple minutes, we found the charm underneath the throne itself in a secret compartment. A quick push and failed trap check later, we had the now slightly burnt lockbox. As we had searched, the king had made his way to the bathroom, and immediately recognized the spell as a spell and not a monster. He yelled that they had been tricked, and to reconvene in the throne room immediately. Halen, still invisible, darted ahead of them. The only guard who stated behind was Rufus' escort, who demanded he leave. Despite Rufus' best efforts, the guard was completely done with his poo poo. So, he knocked him out and used disguise self to take on his image, and followed the hoard of guards rushing the throne room. Halen arrived in the throne room, alerting us to the King's immanent arrival. We tossed him the box, he stashed it in his bag of holding, and he used his ability Flee the Scene, to blink outside. Right after he did this, the King barged it with his platoon of guards. The following exchange took place. King: Where did you put the charm? Venora: Well, you see, it wasn't actually in your compartment so-. King: Kill them. A large battle broke out, interrupted again by Mary dropping Deeper Darkness on the entire battlefield, blinding everyone. In the chaos, the cleric was killed by scorching rays. Eventually, we offed most of the guards, and dropped the King to 0 HP. He collapsed, conscious but very weak. We argued about what to do with him. Rufus wanted to strike him down immediately, since he's been killing people and a tyrant, along with being a weapons grade douche nozzle. However, I reminded him that part of our deal was creating a new rule in the city, and I reasoned that if we had the king alive, along with the charm, we had the power to decide the new rule. Reluctantly, he agreed, and we tied the King up and dragged him out of the castle. As we did, we were greeted with the sight of Arin Wilhelm, an absolute childish archmage that we had run into once previously. He locked us in a force bubble, and started interrogating us about the Charms. We, truthfully, said we had no idea where they were at the moment, which served only to piss him off. He then noticed that Halen wasn't with us, and left Mary to deal with us, while he searched for him. Halen, in the meantime, had been busy. He shattered the lock on the box, and opened it to reveal Bahamut's Charm. He stashed it with the other charm in his bag, and made his way to the Temple where we had agreed to meet the Clerics once the mission had been completed. There, he met them along with Arin, who was throwing a colossal poo poo fit. He was torching guards, lightning bolting statues, and killed our contacts when they showed up. He turned and saw Halen, and immediately demanded the charms. In response, he did something nobody was expecting. He retrieved both from his bag, and threw them around his neck. At this point, I should probably explain what the charms do. The respective charms were created by Bahamut and Tiamat during a war waged hundreds of years before the campaign started. They're used to amplify power, but most significantly magical power. The user also suffers negative effects thanks to the will of the respective dragon being placed in the charm, and slowly lose control of their mind to the respective dragon. You also take on physical looks based on the charm you're wearing, for example, multiple dragon heads with the Tiamat charm. So putting both on not only lead to having both Bahamut and Tiamat fight control for his body and mind, but it also caused him to sprout one platinum wing, and one red. In the words of our DM: “You look like a terrible fan fiction character.” In his brief moment of clarity as both good and evil fought for control of his mind, Halen leveled his hand and fired the mother of all Eldritch blasts at Arin, disintegrating him with one blow. Arin's sudden death lead to Mary having a breakdown almost immediately, and the force bubbles vanished, leaving us free to find Halen. By the time we had gotten there, Halen had lost his will save versus the evil amulet. He cast aside Bahamut's Charm (which I picked up), and was actively hostile to us, saying he knew now why people sought this power, and that he intended to keep it. He Fled the Scene past us, intending to take the fight back to the known world. Before he could run, however, I pulled out my Rod of Ropes, and launched the end at him, pegging him in the back with a bullrush attack. The sudden attack caught him off guard, and sent him to the ground. This allowed him to regain his senses long enough to take off the charm and throw it into his bag. Now that we successfully have prevented any of our party members from going batshit insane, there was still the issue of the city, which had fallen into chaos pretty quick once people had realized what was going on. There was riots and looting, and we had to find some way to bring order back. We managed to stumble onto a broadcasting center that was abandoned after the King started his tyranny. After some failed attempts, we got it back up and running, and announced to the people that there would be a public forum in an hour in the town square, where the future of the city could be determined. We also paid off what was left of the city guard to start trying to bring about some measure of order, especially for the forum. When the time arrived, we had the king tied up and on display, along with a makeshift podium we had managed to construct. Halen also used silent image to create a 40 foot by 30 foot “Illusiotron” so everyone could at the very least see the proceedings with closed captions (which, he added, had liberal “editor's notes”). The forum became a struggle between how Rufus, the people and I wanted the city to be run. Rufus wanted the king to be killed on the spot, abit cleanly and not tortured, but I had a different idea. I took a bit of time to come up with a speech, and proposed to the people not to kill the King, as he had done to many innocent people. To do that to him would make them and their next ruler no better than the King they had just slain. Instead, I suggested imprisonment for life to show to him and themselves that they would learn from the mistakes he had made. In turn, this lead to a discussion about what would be better than a monarchy? Eventually, the discussion turned to Democracy, but more realistically, a Republic with senators elected from each district of the city. While the nobility decried it, and attempted to sway public opinion away from the idea, the crowd supported it completely. The lost city of Arkalon would become the world's first free Republic. While the city was not only saved, but on a totally new course, our party was the most tense it's ever been. Rufus wants the Bahamut's Charm to use against our enemies and save the world, Halen refuses to hand over Tiamat's charm for a reason he won't specify, and my character has Bahamut's Charm, which she just wants to do away with, as they're both too dangerous for mortal hands. Long story short: We fought Evil Robot 'Us'es, made a Toilet Monster, went Fan Fiction, and then created America. Edit: Wow, this also ended up being long as hell. 
CascadeBeta fucked around with this message at 20:44 on Dec 18, 2012 |
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Dec 18, 2012 20:37
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It's a pretty fun little story, though.
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Dec 19, 2012 02:06
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JAssassin posted:The lost city of Arkalon would become the world's first free Republic. What a terrible fate, I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. 
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Dec 19, 2012 05:11
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In my most recent game, the big encounter was a couple of giant sand worms against the party riding on Loftwings. So naturally our Swordmage kept making bird jokes and awful puns. Ash: I guess [my bird] Pit and I are early. Everyone: ???? Ash: You know, cause we got the worm. Eventually it got so bad an NPC declared that she was going to make it illegal to speak Common in their city.
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Dec 19, 2012 06:01
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I ran Paranoia for my group today and it went swimmingly. First games of Paranoia tend to run more towards Zap style, as I understand it, and that's what happened here. Ran the Quantum Traitor, so everyone had a secret objective from their secret society (except one player who had no secret society and was just a really big fan of Teela-O-MLY films) to destroy, open or steal the box (which is too big for any one person to carry). The loyalty officer (and registered mutant) was not subtle in his attempted treachery at all. At one point he was waving his gun wildly while yelling "I THINK THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH MY LASER PISTOL LET ME TRY TO FIX IT" in an attempt (communicated via notes) to kill the rest of the team. He instead killed the two Green goons that were blocking progress, but they all got to move on, so that was something. He was so suspicious and obvious that nobody noticed the actual effective and subtle treachery perpetrated by the hygiene officer. For example, he stuffed some gloves in the exhaust of the team's APC, so it broke down 20 metres down the corridor (this happens anyway in Quantum Traitor but I ran with it). Everyone but the happiness officer was stuck inside, and the lever was on the outside. She got distracted by a Teela-O film festival and didn't pull the lever properly, and returned a couple hours later to find the team's next set of clones waiting by the vehicle, looking less than pleased. Quantum Traitor has a lovely little bit with a game show and secret messages and the mysterious cargo that ends with the entire team left alone in a room with the box with about four conflicting sets of instructions for what to do with it, plus secret society missions. The net result was six players yelling over each other, arguing and shooting each other up over six different courses of action. After the debriefing everyone revealed their secret missions, notes and mutations. A couple of players hadn't cottoned on that everyone was a mutant, so that surprised them. And there was some genuine shock at the treachery perpetrated by the hygiene officer, especially considering he'd received an official commendation and the Hero Of Our Complex award for his dedication to cleanliness. I successfully trained the players to gently caress about with note-passing by writing meaningless notes such as "scowl at player X, make sure he sees you, destroy this note," and "eat this note." (He did.) Other fun things to do with notes include saying your reply to a note question out loud, or saying something completely unrelated. All in all, a good time had, and I've ordered the Flashbacks Redux book so that we can run Orcbusters or whatever at another date. Dr Snofeld fucked around with this message at 03:16 on Dec 31, 2012 |
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Dec 31, 2012 03:14
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Did anyone by chance save the story where that one goon played a dragon campaign as an evil genius white dragon, superlaser and all?
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Jan 3, 2013 08:28
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Plotac 75 posted:Did anyone by chance save the story where that one goon played a dragon campaign as an evil genius white dragon, superlaser and all? Here it is. I googled "white dragon death star" and somehow that's not a band name yet. edit: I wasn't able to find it in the archives, though, so if anybody remembers the original poster (or who saved it) let me know and I'll edit in an attribution here Solomonic fucked around with this message at 23:05 on Jan 3, 2013 |
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Jan 3, 2013 17:40
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Yessss, thank you. That is the best.
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Jan 3, 2013 19:01
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Solomonic posted:Here it is. I googled "white dragon death star" and somehow that's not a band name yet. That was fantastic thank you.
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Jan 3, 2013 19:50
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Solomonic posted:Here it is. I googled "white dragon death star" and somehow that's not a band name yet. Well, that didn't end quite how I expected. Pretty awesome story.
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Jan 3, 2013 22:50
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I had a pretty great GM experience tonight! I'm running a 7th Sea game and the group has gradually shifted over to becoming a Social Justice brigade, doing their best to right the wrongs of corrupt nobility. They're in not-quite-Revolution-era alterna-France and really not appreciating what the Sun King is doing to his country and people. There was some intrigue in previous sessions that necessitated a clandestine meet with a new contact but they left it up to their new acquaintance to decide when and where. Where should swashbucklers meet someone when anonymity is necessary? A night at the opera, of course! I wrote up the outline of a satirical play revolving around ridiculing the King of the neighboring nation alterna-France was waging war against and described the characters and general plot of three of four acts before announcing an intermission when more intrigue could be done. The final act brought the last offensive barbs to the fore, incensing the PC from the wronged nation. OOC'ly, I told the group that I'd give bonux XP for the session if they could accurately describe the subtext of the play and its characters. They actually came up with something half-right and probably better than my own devised outline and were happy to tell me they had a lot of fun critiquing a fake play in a story game. They're either incredibly kind or I might finally have a finger on what they're looking for, but I'm very satisfied either way!
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Jan 4, 2013 06:10
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BlackIronHeart posted:I had a pretty great GM experience tonight! I'm running a 7th Sea game and the group has gradually shifted over to becoming a Social Justice brigade, doing their best to right the wrongs of corrupt nobility. They're in not-quite-Revolution-era alterna-France and really not appreciating what the Sun King is doing to his country and people. There was some intrigue in previous sessions that necessitated a clandestine meet with a new contact but they left it up to their new acquaintance to decide when and where. Where should swashbucklers meet someone when anonymity is necessary? A night at the opera, of course! Bonus points if your next play is "The King In Yellow" and your campaign suddenly converts from 7th Sea to Call of Cthulhu.
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Jan 4, 2013 13:46
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Every game should have an insanity stat. If your not going insane while saving the world(s), then somethings being done wrong.
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Jan 4, 2013 14:47
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Grey Hunter posted:Every game should have an insanity stat. If your not going insane while saving the world(s), then somethings being done wrong. The best games don't need insanity stats; the players get more and more outlandishly crazy with each new plan they concoct. Don't you try and shackle me with your numbers, man!
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Jan 4, 2013 15:06
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Volmarias posted:Bonus points if your next play is "The King In Yellow" and your campaign suddenly converts from 7th Sea to Call of Cthulhu. Joke's on you, 7th Sea already is Call of Cthulu: Age of Sail.
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Jan 4, 2013 15:26
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Had a rather silly session last Sunday in my D&D group. We have a house rule where if you critical fail a roll, you roll another D20 to see how terribly you failed. If you roll high on the second roll, you just miss, but if you roll another 1, you keep rolling until you get a non 1 result, with each 1 meaning more terrible (and comedic things) happening to your character. Across multiple D20s, our group and DM rolled more natural 1s than I thought was humanly possible. In the previous session, one of the guards of an Archmage we were fighting rolled 5 1s in a row, leading to the guard dropping his sword, falling ontop of it and promptly killing himself. Later on, the DM was swapping between 3 dices during a combat with a group of poisonous spiders, to no avail. He started rolling out in the open too just because of how absurd it all was. The highlight of the night was after about a half hour of this tomfoolery, and after another series of 1s, the DM stood up and announced "THE SPIDERS HAVE SLAIN THEMSELVES!" It was a two way street, though. I don't think I've rolled above a 1 in a combat situation for about five rolls in a row myself now. And then there was this Drow motherfucker who crit 4 times in a row. Edit: Also, the DM for my group has decided that if nobody else wants to DM, he's going to do another campaign set in the same world about 200-300 years in the future. I'm so excited already. 
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Jan 4, 2013 16:18
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BlackIronHeart posted:I had a pretty great GM experience tonight! I'm running a 7th Sea game and the group has gradually shifted over to becoming a Social Justice brigade, doing their best to right the wrongs of corrupt nobility. They're in not-quite-Revolution-era alterna-France and really not appreciating what the Sun King is doing to his country and people. There was some intrigue in previous sessions that necessitated a clandestine meet with a new contact but they left it up to their new acquaintance to decide when and where. Where should swashbucklers meet someone when anonymity is necessary? A night at the opera, of course! More campaigns should include theatre. Fairly early in my old 4e campaign I had my players infiltrate a party disguised as actors, and wrote the worst one-act play I could manage. You know, amnesia, people stating their feelings, overly flowery prose, that sort of thing. The players had a great time and I'm pretty sure that some of them kept their copies of the manuscript. Next campaign, I'm thinking oni kabuki theatre.
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Jan 4, 2013 22:14
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I'm shocked theater/circus stuff isn't a trope more well used, it almost always at the least involves amusing failures. Last time there was a thing like that in a game I was in we were playing Spycraft and decided the easiest way to watch our target in his private booth during a sold out opera was to Hitman some people we assumed were minor players and steal their costumes. This lead to one of the group accidentally taking out a lead character and being forced to bluff her way through an opera while trying to keep it going so we could watch the target do a typical super-spy badguy deal in his booth.
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Jan 4, 2013 22:27
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Dr Snofeld posted:More campaigns should include theatre. Fairly early in my old 4e campaign I had my players infiltrate a party disguised as actors, and wrote the worst one-act play I could manage. You know, amnesia, people stating their feelings, overly flowery prose, that sort of thing. The players had a great time and I'm pretty sure that some of them kept their copies of the manuscript. Oh my god I love this and I'm totally stealing it.
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Jan 5, 2013 01:51
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I finally got my friends to play a tabletop game after months of being shot down. They absolutely loved it and can't wait to play it again. (micro20lite, using this system because my group is all first time rpg players and I wanted to put in some custom stuff) I tried to make a hilarious campaign that allowed for plentiful shenanigans, and I'm glad to say I succeeded. Some of the highlights: I started the group out as they were attending a wild midevil party, knowing they would warm up to the game faster that way, and I was eventually going to have the main evil guy attack the town, crashing the party by killing as many people as he could with magic and getting them framed so they could be arrested to further the story. Of course, I provided lots of drugs and booze to let them dumb down their skills before this happened, and I used different dice depending on the potency of the intoxicants to lower or raise their skills. One guy in the party got incredibly hosed up and brought his intelligence from 15 down to 4 (that's negative 3 to every roll in micro20lite), but he always rolled great when boosting his health, and ended up with double HP. Everybody was laughing and pointing out how stupid he was, and then when the magic guy attacked and he ran down the stairs, he was struck by a magic bolt. He didn't have any armor, and was left with 2 hp. The only reason he survived was because of how incredibly hosed up his character was. Oh, and the best part was that I didn't have to frame them for murder because one of the party members killed 2 guys in the bathroom before the attack because ,"They were taking too long". Later, the group found a magic pearl key to the story, and hid it in their apartment. Of course bad dudes came in the house to search for it. When the leader of the evil henchmen lit a fireball in his hand threatening to burn the place down, one of the party members used a water spell the put out the fire in his hand like a smartass. This of course infuriated the bad dude and he reacted by burning the entire house down and beating the poo poo out of one of the party members until he told the bad dude where the pearl was. When the group finally caught up to the guys to get the pearl back later on, the party weakened the main pearl thief, and I let them do what they want to the dude in an act of revenge before they made the killing blow because I am the coolest DM ever.One of the guys in the group decided he wanted to pull the guy's pants down and spank him. When I asked him why the gently caress he would even want to do that he responded with, "I didn't come here to kill him, I came here to teach him a lesson". The party actually ended up taking the pearl and leaving the dude tied up with a bunch of hand marks on his rear end. Long story short, I love my group.
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Jan 5, 2013 08:08
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Fautzo posted:When the group finally caught up to the guys to get the pearl back later on, the party weakened the main pearl thief, and I let them do what they want to the dude in an act of revenge before they made the killing blow because I am the coolest DM ever.One of the guys in the group decided he wanted to pull the guy's pants down and spank him. When I asked him why the gently caress he would even want to do that he responded with, "I didn't come here to kill him, I came here to teach him a lesson". The party actually ended up taking the pearl and leaving the dude tied up with a bunch of hand marks on his rear end. Ahahahahaha drat son. Even with our Rule One (no torture, ever) I'd be worried to do that because my players would still probably do something nasty like cutting off a body part or something. If they decided to just humiliate the poo poo out of him, you have a pretty good group in the making. Murdering dudes for taking too long in the bathroom is a little sociopathic, I suppose, but then again I'm not casting any stones. After all, it's a very down-to-earth wish fulfillment, since I don't think anyone can deny having wanted to do that in real life at some point
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Jan 5, 2013 11:17
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Finally got around to introducing my friends to P&P and we had a blast. Thought Dungeon World would be a good place to start so we rolled up a few dudes and I ran them through a heavily edited Indigo Galleon adventure. They totally got it straight away and had a blast, will probably start running a monthly game night or something soon. Couple of stories. The party They roll up a cleric, fighter, ranger and bard. Despite having absolutely no experience with RPGS all but the bard drop Charisma as their lowest stat. The adventure begins with the party being welcomed into a coastal society. So I think about it and it's like: "Okay so the party come in to town. There's this rear end in a top hat ranger who hates all animal life with a battered hawk flying around him with the tags [savage] and [intimidating]. There's this tall, spooky witch with pulsating purple hair who talks to an invisible god. There's this eight foot tall fully armored giant who lumbers around a gigantic axe with the tags [intimidating] and [huge]. At the front is a chubby bard with a lute and a sandwich asking 'ello can we come in your town?" Because he was the only even slightly social character, the bard did a load of awesome things. Before the entire town the party agree to go and track down a murderous pirate who has gone missing in the neraby flatlands and the guy playing Florian the bard starts describing how he starts the crowd chanting the opening beat to We Will Rock You, before making them stick out their hands so he can run down high-fiving them one by one. gently caress Hawkeye Due to misinterpreting the word 'nature', one girl made an elfen ranger who only loved the flora half of nature. He had a hawk called Hawkeye that he sent to scout, attack, but generally cared nothing for.  Okay, hard choice time, the frog monster grabs Hawkeye from the air and throws him straight at you. Hawkeye is spiralling through the air and is on course to hit you in the chest, which will cushion the blow but send you flying into the sea. Instead, you CAN" Yeah I do that What? Whatever it is that means I don't go into the sea. gently caress Hawkeye.My weapon is my wit! Later on the party get captured by frog people. Fearing an outright battle, they agree to go along quietly to the dungeon (which is where they want to go anyway). One by one the frogs ask them to surrended their weapons, and all of them do. When it comes to the bard they ask "what is your weapon?" and the player replies "the weapon is my wit!" The frog people have no understanding of the word, they look to one another in confusion, then insist that you surrender your wit immediately. Okay! So you lay your rapier down? No, here is my wit! I dig into my satchel and grab one of my rations, a pig in a blanket, and delicately place it on the ground as if I'm handling a live grenage.
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Jan 5, 2013 16:33
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Captain_Indigo posted:
 That player deserves a medal. (Both for being witty, and for sidestepping the lewd jokes.)
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Jan 5, 2013 16:47
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Captain_Indigo posted:My weapon is my wit! I hope you gave him some sort of bonus for that, for being clever as poo poo.
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Jan 5, 2013 17:30
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The best bonus would be to give them tons of frog people to fight, and a pack full of pigs-in-a-blanket. "Oh poo poo, he's got more wit! Everybody run!"
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Jan 5, 2013 17:51
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I picture the frog people as being half a foot tall (15cm to you euros) and it just makes that story even funnier.
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Jan 5, 2013 18:17
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We had some more sessions of Pirates Of The Spanish Main. I might be posting several stories later on, but right now I need to post this one. Way Of The Drunkard: Double Crotch Hammer For some reason, our merry crew is helping out a young lady looking for his father. They were supposed to meet in a tavern, but instead we meet this sleazy fop who explains the father knows where a pirate treasure is buried... and now that he has the girl, the father will surely reveal its location! Which is to say, he and his cohorts attack us and try to snatch away the girl. Here's the thing, though. My character, the one-eyed french navigator, was not part of this conversation, he was off to the side, treating a crewmate's wound. None of the baddies know he's there. Also, at the beginning of the session, everyone of us was randomly dealt a special card that we can play during the encounter. Mine was "Greased Barrels" that can be used (among other things) to reduce the roll penalty of a crazy stunt by up to 4. In Savage Worlds, that's quite a large number. I ask the GM to let me define the room, specifically its floor. I use the card, and my character then jumps up and then down from a table, bringing his full weight and force down on two loose planks, the other ends of which were conveniently located between two thugs' legs. Of course. If only the bar would have had a chandelier, then it would have been a perfect swashbuckling setup. The planks hit hard enough to completely incapacitate them both, greatly easing the encounter. That was good, because the fop was actually a master duelist whose swordfighting stats were about twice as big as ours and he almost wiped the floor with us. He took out our favorite NPC crew-member, too, the fucker.
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Jan 5, 2013 21:54
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