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Monicro
Oct 21, 2010

And you could feel his features in the air
A wide smile and perfect hair
He had complete control of the rising tides
And a medicine bag hanging at his side

In the flowing blue world of the death-dealing physician
B.

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gardenald
Jul 23, 2007

In the end, it comes down to throwing one pitch after another, and seeing what happens. With each new consequence, the game begins to take shape.

UZworm posted:

I'd also be OK with it if someone would just offer one really good left fielder in exchange for Hamels.

I got this '78 Carl Yastrzemski I'm not using because I have Stan the Man patrolling LF. I had him at 1st in the expansion cup and he performed well for me, but between Musial, Prince Fielder, and Jim Rice I've got nowhere to play him. I'd throw in 2011 Roy Oswalt as well.

e: Or '51 Enos Slaughter

gardenald fucked around with this message at 10:40 on Jan 29, 2013

UZworm
Feb 9, 2009

Young wild Elsweyrian
C'mon baby, do you have a soul gem

Cthulhu Dreams posted:

What year on galrraga?

'96. He did hit moderately well as a backup 1B in the EC, if you're actually considering.

ForeverBWFC posted:

I can give you Roseboro and Kirk Gibson for Hamels.

I, like the last 20 people you've traded with, don't want Roseboro. Got any relievers instead to add as a second piece? Also, what year is Gibson?

ForeverBWFC
Oct 19, 2011

Oh, the lads! You should've seen 'em running!
Ask 'em why and they reply the Bolton Boys are coming! All the lads and lasses, smiles upon their faces,

WALKING DOWN THE MANNY ROAD, TO SEE THE BURNDEN ACES!

UZworm posted:

I, like the last 20 people you've traded with, don't want Roseboro. Got any relievers instead to add as a second piece? Also, what year is Gibson?

But he's actually not too bad! Will check years and pitching staff when I get home.

Pete Ladd
Mar 9, 2012

UZworm posted:

All right, slight change to tact here:

Proposal
Spooners trade:
2011 Cole Hamels

PMs trade:
2012 Rex Brothers
2012 Marco Scutero
2004 Bret Boone
2012 Matt Belisle



I still Accept this. For the haters, it's a currently great reliever, a possibly good reliever, a startable second baseman with power, and a utility man. All for a lefty who Mogul doesn't seem to like very much, and has a 4.50 ERA or so. This is the limit of what I'm willing to give up for Hamels.

Gibson had like one good year for BWFC and otherwise won't OBP over .280.

quote:

I'm interested in '97 Scott Radinsky, plus I guess '76 Grant Jackson/'04 Putz/'12 Belisle. Make me an offer for some of those guys. Or multiple offers. Or whatever.

OK, let me look.

Pander
Oct 9, 2007

Fear is the glue that holds society together. It's what makes people suppress their worst impulses. Fear is power.

And at the end of fear, oblivion.



Mornacale posted:

I'm interested in '97 Scott Radinsky, plus I guess '76 Grant Jackson/'04 Putz/'12 Belisle. Make me an offer for some of those guys. Or multiple offers. Or whatever.

-----

By the way, Pander, if it's really Old Slaughter holding up the deal, what if we replace him with Clyde Shoun and Howie Krist? I don't want to commit to anything, because honestly these guys are all probably unplayable and I want to see what Sam Beckett will offer, but I'm just tossing it out there to discuss.
No, it's not old Enos that's holding it up, it's me spending the bulk of last night rock climbing and playing with my kitten rather than checking out who you offered and what you wanted. I'll figure something out during a break.

ChtluluDreams: I really don't know what trade we could work out. My greatest needs are pitching-related, and your pitchers are either as good or better than Ford, or far, far, worse. I wouldn't mind a good bench player, but your bench (while having some nice names) is bleh and doesn't meet my greatest positional need (3B). Unless you want a change of scenery trade (Mathewson, Carlton, or Big Train for Ford) or are willing to give up way too much of what you need (Schilling + Collins + Soria + Sasaki for Ford) I don't see us having a good mix.

The Merry Marauder
Apr 4, 2009

"But she goes not abroad, in search of monsters to destroy. She is the well-wisher to the freedom and independence of all. She is the champion and vindicator only of her own."


So, uh, it seems Brian Giles is playing third base for me against lefties. I should probably do something about that. Send down Henrich, call up Richie Allen.

New Lineup:

RF Beltran
CF Carey
LF Giles
DH Gehrig/Piazza
1B Ortiz/Allen
2B Collins/Gordon
SS Alomar
C Lombardi
3B Rolfe

Rance the Cyborg should board the ship.

Archie Goodwin
Jan 2, 2012
Using intelligence guided by experience since 1934.


Kind of a rough week. Pull THE Thornton Lee for Jered Weaver - let him ruminate on screwing up.

I really don't want Rickey or Barry to break, so play Krukster in left against RHP and bench Larkin for Al Dark for the week.

I think Baines should be in a platoon with Evans in right, but I may have broken that up by accident at some point.

Thanks, Smasher!

Rance should go.

Pete Ladd
Mar 9, 2012

Mornacale posted:

I'm interested in '97 Scott Radinsky, plus I guess '76 Grant Jackson/'04 Putz/'12 Belisle. Make me an offer for some of those guys. Or multiple offers. Or whatever.



My more mature version of Holtzman is doing pretty well in front of my infield D - I'll take a shot on your young Ken Holtzman for Grant Jackson and Radinsky?

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."
So, wait, exactly what (generally useless) trades have you guys made?

Smasher League Week 22 Injury Report

Luna Landers
Slim Love (SP) (You've lost that lovin' feeling!) - 7 days

South Bolton Eazy W's
Eri Yoshida (RP) (What have you done, kw0134?) - 13 days
Mark Bellhorn (IF) (Vowed to hunt down and bring kw0134 to justice!) - 13 days

UZworm
Feb 9, 2009

Young wild Elsweyrian
C'mon baby, do you have a soul gem

Smasher Dynamo posted:

So, wait, exactly what (generally useless) trades have you guys made?

The one from NotThatSamBeckett is ready to be accepted by me, but I have it on hold right now, so none yet.

BWFC, the main reason I don't want Roseboro is because I don't see him doing any better than Bassler as my backup catcher to Porter. If I'm going to go for a catcher at some point, I'm going to want to get a starter to push Porter into the backup position.

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

UZworm posted:

The one from NotThatSamBeckett is ready to be accepted by me, but I have it on hold right now, so none yet.

Hamels isn't having that bad a season. He has about a 4.00 ERA in less than forty innings. It's way, way, way to early to give up on him for four players that you will never use.

UZworm
Feb 9, 2009

Young wild Elsweyrian
C'mon baby, do you have a soul gem

Smasher Dynamo posted:

Hamels isn't having that bad a season. He has about a 4.00 ERA in less than forty innings. It's way, way, way to early to give up on him for four players that you will never use.

This is why I'm looking at other offers.

Though, I would probably use Brothers, Boone is probably a better starting option than Frank White at 2B and Scutero is a better bench infielder than Vinny Castilla so I don't think the trade is quite as useless to me as you're saying. (My team is not very good)

UZworm fucked around with this message at 22:02 on Jan 29, 2013

Pander
Oct 9, 2007

Fear is the glue that holds society together. It's what makes people suppress their worst impulses. Fear is power.

And at the end of fear, oblivion.



Mornacale posted:

I'm interested in '97 Scott Radinsky, plus I guess '76 Grant Jackson/'04 Putz/'12 Belisle. Make me an offer for some of those guys. Or multiple offers. Or whatever.

-----

By the way, Pander, if it's really Old Slaughter holding up the deal, what if we replace him with Clyde Shoun and Howie Krist? I don't want to commit to anything, because honestly these guys are all probably unplayable and I want to see what Sam Beckett will offer, but I'm just tossing it out there to discuss.
After analyzing this, I'm good for '54 Slaughter + '42 Krist + '42 Shoun + '42 White for '67 Holtzman.

Pander
Oct 9, 2007

Fear is the glue that holds society together. It's what makes people suppress their worst impulses. Fear is power.

And at the end of fear, oblivion.



Pander posted:

After analyzing this, I'm good for '54 Slaughter + '42 Krist + '42 Shoun + '42 White for '67 Holtzman.
Putting this on hiatus. Still good for it in theory, just later on, not now.

Revenant Threshold
Jan 1, 2008


It's not really damage control, it's not so ineffectual as rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic, but it's probably somewhere in between. Rodriguez back in for Sweeney, and Sweeney can replace Cabrera at 1B vs. righties.

I suppose it stands to reason that when I fix my pitching staff (they're not the greatest, but they work!) everyone else dies.

Mornacale
Dec 19, 2007

n=y where
y=hope and n=folly,
prospects=lies, win=lose,

self=Pirates

Smasher Dynamo posted:

So, wait, exactly what (generally useless) trades have you guys made?

Definitely the Hippo Vaughn trade actually for-real happened. Also, because you love me, in the event that tonight's update doesn't answer these questions, could you?

:love: What are Youk and Hippo's OVRs?
:love: Am I correct to believe that Kevin Youkilis profiles as a poor-range/poor-arm/awesome-glove player who knows how to handle himself at either 1B or 3B?
:love: Can I legally run out a rotation that includes Hoss, Bender, Hippo, and Hendrix? (Does the answer change depending on whether it's a 4- or 5-man?)

-----

Pander, just to be clear, is Bill Lohrman intentionally excluded from that proposal?

Monathin
Sep 1, 2011

?????????
?



:siren:TRADE ALERT:siren:

Canton Catastrophes Receive:
2005 Roger Clemens

Philadelphia Failures Receive:
1910 Harry Coveleski
1987 Dave Parker

mentholmoose
Nov 5, 2009

YKNOW THERES ONLY ONE DIRECTION I KNOW AND THATS DRIVIN STRAIGHT TO THE NET


Monathin posted:

:siren:TRADE ALERT:siren:

Canton Catastrophes Receive:
2005 Roger Clemens

Philadelphia Failures Receive:
1910 Harry Coveleski
1987 Dave Parker

Failures approve the trade.

I'll leave Coveleski and Parker in the minors for now.

BearDrivingTruck
Oct 15, 2011

You see the most shocking sights sometimes
I'm afraid that I have some bad news. My laptop's hard drive died yesterday, and while they replaced it today, everything was wiped, including all my data for the Pessimists. I'm a moron, so nothing was backed up.

So, Smasher, I think it would be best if I retire from the current league. I'm really sorry to do this near the end of the season, but I don't see many options. If you see a way around this, then please, tell me.

Mornacale
Dec 19, 2007

n=y where
y=hope and n=folly,
prospects=lies, win=lose,

self=Pirates
Smasher, please rename Monathin's team to the Canton Centagenarians.

kw0134
Apr 19, 2003

I buy feet pics🍆

Smasher Dynamo posted:

So, wait, exactly what (generally useless) trades have you guys made?

Smasher League Week 22 Injury Report

South Bolton Eazy W's
Eri Yoshida (RP) (What have you done, kw0134?) - 13 days
Mark Bellhorn (IF) (Vowed to hunt down and bring kw0134 to justice!) - 13 days
I haven't done anything, and if I did it clearly wasn't enough. Which I didn't do, just to make clear.

mentholmoose
Nov 5, 2009

YKNOW THERES ONLY ONE DIRECTION I KNOW AND THATS DRIVIN STRAIGHT TO THE NET

BearDrivingTruck posted:

I'm afraid that I have some bad news. My laptop's hard drive died yesterday, and while they replaced it today, everything was wiped, including all my data for the Pessimists. I'm a moron, so nothing was backed up.

So, Smasher, I think it would be best if I retire from the current league. I'm really sorry to do this near the end of the season, but I don't see many options. If you see a way around this, then please, tell me.

I would assume your roster and all the changes are located in your posts in this thread. It should take just a couple minutes to reconstruct whatever roster you had.

What else would you need, exactly?

BearDrivingTruck
Oct 15, 2011

You see the most shocking sights sometimes

mentholmoose posted:

I would assume your roster and all the changes are located in your posts in this thread. It should take just a couple minutes to reconstruct whatever roster you had.

Ah, good point.

Never mind, then.


Smasher, if it actually is a concern, please give me a few days to reconstruct. I'm traveling tomorrow, and I'm busy restoring things tonight.

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

BearDrivingTruck posted:

I'm afraid that I have some bad news. My laptop's hard drive died yesterday, and while they replaced it today, everything was wiped, including all my data for the Pessimists. I'm a moron, so nothing was backed up.

So, Smasher, I think it would be best if I retire from the current league. I'm really sorry to do this near the end of the season, but I don't see many options. If you see a way around this, then please, tell me.

I have all of the data for your team, so I'm not exactly sure what you lost, but I can replace it regardless.

Also the Failures-Catastrophes headache is approved.

ForeverBWFC
Oct 19, 2011

Oh, the lads! You should've seen 'em running!
Ask 'em why and they reply the Bolton Boys are coming! All the lads and lasses, smiles upon their faces,

WALKING DOWN THE MANNY ROAD, TO SEE THE BURNDEN ACES!

kw0134 posted:

I haven't done anything, and if I did it clearly wasn't enough. Which I didn't do, just to make clear.

I don't trust you, but at least your scheme failed to do lasting damage, and came at a time when it mattered little. Axford to MR, everyone else moves up one. Move The Chosen Dunn back to 1B, Al Simmons back to LF. If Al Simmons isn't rested enough, then move Mark "Motherfuckin'" Grace to 1B and The Chosen Dunn to LF 'till Big Al's had enough of a lie down.

BearDrivingTruck
Oct 15, 2011

You see the most shocking sights sometimes

Smasher Dynamo posted:

I have all of the data for your team, so I'm not exactly sure what you lost, but I can replace it regardless.

Also the Failures-Catastrophes headache is approved.

I lost my roster, lineups, and sliders.

Monicro
Oct 21, 2010

And you could feel his features in the air
A wide smile and perfect hair
He had complete control of the rising tides
And a medicine bag hanging at his side

In the flowing blue world of the death-dealing physician

BearDrivingTruck posted:



Hit and Run: -2
Sacrifice Bunt: +3
Squeeze Play: +3
Trying for extra bases: +1
Stealing Bases: +2
Aggressively Tagging Up: 0
Pitch Outs (to prevent stolen bases): +3
Giving Intentional Walks: +1
Pitching Around Good Hitters: -3 :getin:
Bringing the Infield In: 0
Guarding the Lines: +2
Making Cutoff Throws: +2
Bringing in Pinch Hitters: 0
Bringing in Pinch Runners: +1
Bringing in Defensive Replacements: +3
Starting Pitchers on Short Rest: -4
Letting pitchers pitch throw trouble: +2
Letting Pitchers rack up high pitch counts: +1

Starting Rotation:
Carl Hubbell
Mike Krukow
Billy Pierce
Hal Schumacher
Danny Neagle

Lineup Without DH:
Mel Ott (RF)
Luis Aparicio (SS)
Nellie Fox (2B)
Bill Terry (1B)
Minnie Minoso (LF)
Terry Kennedy (C)
Larry Doby (CF)
Ernie Riles (3B)
Pitcher’s Spot

Lineup With DH:
Mel Ott (RF)
Luis Aparicio (SS)
Nellie Fox (2B)
Will Clark (DH)
Bill Terry (1B)
Minnie Minoso (LF)
Terry Kennedy (C)
Larry Doby (CF)
Ernie Riles (3B)


25 Man Roster:
1: Mel Ott (RF)
2: Luis Aparicio (SS)
3: Nellie Fox (2B)
4: Bill Terry (1B)
5: Minnie Minoso (LF)
6: Sherm Lollar (C)
7: Larry Doby (CF)
8: Matt Williams (3B)
9: Will Clark (1B/DH)
10: Bob Brenly (C)
11: George Watkins (OF)
12: Bubba Phillips (3B)
13: Robby Thompson (2B)

1: Carl Hubbell (SP)
2: Mike Krukow (SP)
3: Billy Pierce (SP)
4: Hal Schumacher (SP)
5: Danny Neagle (SP)
6: Craig Lefferts (CL)
7: Dixie Howell (R)
8: Miss Atlee Hammaker (R)
9: Terry Mulholland(R)
10: Paul LaPalme (R)
11: Jason Schmidt (R)
12: Freddie Fitzsimmons (R)

Minors:
Candy Maldonado (OF)
Jose Uribe (SS)
Blondy Ryan (Infield)


Is this good?

:v:

BearDrivingTruck
Oct 15, 2011

You see the most shocking sights sometimes

Thanks a whole bunch. I realize now that I could have gone back to look for it myself, but I've been on a weird rollercoaster of emotions.

Seriously though, thanks.

Smasher Dynamo
Oct 16, 2008

Eternal Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."


Super-League VIII, Dynamo League Week 22: The Headache

Games of the Week


Don May posted:


TORNADOS DEVASTATE COBURNS WITH LATE COMEBACK

Cancun- The Coburns may be looking to make the playoffs, but the Tornados are looking to become champions, and champions find ways to win the close games.

Down 6-5, the Tornados turned to their offense for one last push. Jackie Robinson grounded out to start the inning, followed by a walk to Roy Johnson and then a hit and run that effective worked like a sacrifice bunt, moving Johnson to second while costing the Tornados their second out of the inning. But the heart of the lineup was now due up for the Tornados and Sliding Billy Hamilton singled home Johnson to tie the game. Feeling the momentum, Tris Speaker then knocked a double down the right-field line, easily scoring Hamilton for the game-winning RBI.

UltimoDragonQuest, famous for his complete lack of personality, and known as perhaps the most boring owner in Super-League history, tried to repair his reputation in his post-game press conference, "You know, Warm Sarsaparilla, you talk a lot about your Coburn, but UltimoDragonQuest 3:16 says that-" Steve, Prince of Fate, then interrupted UltimoDragonQuest, taking the microphone from him before he could finish that sentence.

"Right, no need to go into any of that, I think," Steve stiff-armed UltimoDragonQuest, knocking him to the ground in order to make sure that he could regain the mic. "I believe what my mostly intelligent manager had meant to say before he resorted to unfortunate cliche, was that we are clearly of a different class than the Coburns, and that it is time to start treating us as the very real contenders that we are. I am well aware, as you all are as well, that no expansion team has ever won the Super-League Championship...until this very season, I should think, when the Cancun Tornados, that most refreshing squadron of Tornadic men shall blow asunder the calcified remains of the old Super-League, and the old men who have built this staid and soporific league shall reap the whirlwind of discontent they have created in our person. Yes, we are a renewing wind that cures old evils. And that, if anything, is Steve 3:16-3:22."

As always, Warm Sarsaparilla remained stoic, "The great Coburn could not give his followers victory without end, for how could they develop faith in such a situation? No, to have faith, real faith, there must be trials and tribulations, to prove that when doubt is at its strongest, trying to topple your tower of faith, that you can defend it. Yes, faith is like a tower defense game, and only the righteous can make it past level ten. And I hold the high score. Glory be to Coburn!"

GAME NOTES

-Warm Sarsaparilla was wrong about Sonny Siebert. Dead wrong.

-The Tornados were 5-for-5 on steal attempts. Jorge Posada, asked after the game about this statistic, appeared confused, "Wait, you can throw out guys trying to steal bases? Are you sure, that does not seem right."

-The official '90s song of this game was "Iris" by the Goo Goo Dolls.

Box Score





Don May posted:


MICHAEL JORDAN IS MICHAEL JORDAN, DEFEATS ALLEGED FELON KW0134 AND GENERICS 3-1

Rochester- Michael Jordan does not lose.

Ever.

When the Elephants started the top of the eighth down 1-0, Michael Jordan led off with a double, and later scored to tie the game.

But Michael Jordan does not tie, either.

And so, with runners at first and second and two outs, Michael Jordan was the last hope the Elephants had to win the game. And he did not disappoint, hitting a single to give his team a 2-1 lead, later extended to 3-1, that the Generics had no chance to overcome, lacking in both talent and moral character.

kw0134 was more concerned with a recent Super-League inquiry looking into allegations that, by means unknown, kw0134 somehow, either personally or by contract, injured Eri Yoshida, with whom he had been feuding for the past few months. His "lawyer", Tim Teufel, who claims to be a graduate of the Smasher Dynamo Academy of Law, spoke to reporters, "My client, a respected member of the Rochester community, strenuously denies these scurrilous allegations. After all, what kind of upstanding citizen would seek to injure a teenage girl, even if he did continually bait him with her annoying behavior that would cause any man, no matter how patient or non-violent to eventually snap. But he didn't snap. I want to make that clear. My client did not do that, even if it would be totally justified if he had. Which he didn't."

Chuck Finley, who started the game, and also described himself as a "Criminal Legal Expert" based on the rather dubious criterion of having seen a bunch of episodes of Law and Order during the offseason, explained that it couldn't have been kw0134 who did it, "It's never the first guy you suspect! No, they always bring in the first suspect, and question him, and then the lieutenant comes in and tells them that the lab called them and there's some reason why it couldn't have been the first suspect. No, it's always the special guest star and, let's be honest with ourselves, guys, kw0134 doesn't have that kind of star power. He's basically just an extra in the Super-League. He can't be the real perp here. Nah, I bet it's someone like Marauder...or Mark Grace...or Zebulon Montgomery, the British Ambassador to America, who will hide behind diplomatic immunity to try and get away with the crime. But can Jack McCoy get a conviction?...."

GAME NOTES

-Chuck Finley hit a home run? His trade value will never be higher than it is now!

Box Score





Losin' against the Losers

: Yoshida's out with an injury, so I'll take care of this on my own. The Losers are the reigning Hardcore Champs, and now the Spooners are going to make their fourth attempt to win this title. The first three didn't go so well, but maybe things will be different this time. Or maybe not, as the Losers cruise to a win in Game 1.



: Topper Rigney keeps the Spooners' hopes of winning the Hardcore Title alive.



: But, in a battle of aces, Satchel Paige is able to be just a bit better than Ed Walsh, and the Losers retain their Hardcore title for their second straight defense.



: And now the Pessimists will get a shot...and will be drilled by the Losers for their trouble.



: And Drysdale with a complete game win, and the Losers retain again.



: And the Losers complete the sweep. That was not the best series the Pessimists have ever had.



: With the Losers making two straight defenses, next week will open with Losers-Oranges and then either Losers-Dervishes or Oranges-Tornados.


Team Statistics









Analysis

You have exactly one pitcher with an ERA under 4...and that's Craig Lefferts, and he has an ERA of 3.95. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that might be a problem.










Analysis

Well, sweeping the Unicorns will probably just about wrap up a playoff berth. Still, you might want to try out Pie Traynor.










Analysis

Let's hope for a monster Gauntlet run.










Analysis

Fast running, good pitching, and proof that an Expansion owner can build a winner in a single season.










Analysis

WAKE UP!










Analysis

That was as bad a week as you could have had, but as long as you don't do it again, you should still be able to get into the playoffs pretty easily.










Analysis

Things seemed to have bottomed out, at least.










Analysis

The ship is sinking
The ship is sinking
There's a leak, there's a leak
in the boiler room
The poor, the lame, the blind
Who are the ones that we kept in charge?
Killers, thieves and lawyers!

God's away, God's away, God's away on business, business










Analysis

Ten times better than they have any right to be! At least Joss will be back for the playoffs.










Analysis

Soon.










Analysis

I do not understand your team on a fundamental level. Your lineup isn't that good, your pitching isn't that good, but here you are, primed to survive the season.










Analysis

So, uh...no. The Bulldogs aren't going to cheat their way out of this one.










Analysis

: You come at the king, kw0134, you'd best not miss!










Analysis

And that should just about do it for the rest of the regular season.










Analysis

Michael Jordan is the only man standing between you and relegation.










Analysis

Your master plan hasn't been too impressive so far.


Standings and Leaders






Playoffs/Gauntlet Picture







A. Send Dunn to his doom! - 1 vote

B. No one would miss Rance! - 8 votes

"Very well," Marauder motioned to Rance Mullinix, "Here, Rance, take this bomb, and prepare for transport right into the heart of the enemy's foremost battlecruiser. It will be up to you to place the bomb, and then get out. You'll have fifteen minutes to complete this task!" A light shimmered around Rance, and he was gone. "The rest of us will be able to track him on the viewing globe!"

The viewing globe activated, and began displaying a visual of the interior of the battlecruiser, leaving unexplained just how Marauder was able to get this footage. Either way, Rance's mission did not last long. He materialized in a corridor, and then the bomb immediately exploded. The globe switched to an exterior shot, and the battlecruiser was soon consumed in a series of explosions, destroying it utterly.

"Wait, was that what was supposed to happen?" Mark Grace was more than a bit confused.

Marauder smiled, "I'll admit it seemed a bit neater just to have the bomb go off immediately, rather than waiting until he got to the reactor room." The other members of the team just shrugged their shoulders. "What, is no one going to be shocked that I just knowing sent one of you to your deaths?"

Eri Yoshida spoke for the team, "Well, I mean, you are Marauder. And it's just Rance Mullinix, so...I guess I'm a bit confused to why you couldn't have just teleported the bomb by itself, though."

A quizzical expression formed on Marauder's face, "Yes...I could have done that. Too late now, I suppose. Unless I was going to fire up the time machine...but I'd really rather not, as it's in storage, and we'd have to move a lot of boxes. Best to just move on to planning a memorial service for Rance. After all, it's not like we're savages. Let's split up the work, that will make it go faster. Mark Grace, what would you like to take care of?"

DECISION TIME

Will Mark Grace...

A. Take care of the invitations, after all, it's not like Rance had a ton of friends or family.

B. Take care of finding a Zoroastrian priest, as per Rance's instructions left in his last will and testament.

C. Take care of the catering...after all, gyros can be catered, can't they?

Senerio
Oct 19, 2009

Roëmænce is ælive!
C. We'll get our goddamn gyros or die trying. Again.

Monicro
Oct 21, 2010

And you could feel his features in the air
A wide smile and perfect hair
He had complete control of the rising tides
And a medicine bag hanging at his side

In the flowing blue world of the death-dealing physician
C.

gardenald
Jul 23, 2007

In the end, it comes down to throwing one pitch after another, and seeing what happens. With each new consequence, the game begins to take shape.
Gyros. Goddamn gyros. C.

blackmongoose
Mar 31, 2011

DARK INFERNO ROOK!
Ironically, I've been arranging to have gyros delivered for an event tomorrow and it's been a tremendous pain to work everything out. I blame you, Smasher, and vote C. Also, put Home Run Baker back in at 3B

Monathin
Sep 1, 2011

?????????
?

C. at least Catered Gyros should be easier to obtain.

UZworm
Feb 9, 2009

Young wild Elsweyrian
C'mon baby, do you have a soul gem
Screw it, I'll cancel any Hamels trades unless I can get a legit starting LF for him (which I won't be able to do since Hamels seems to have a bad BBM rep).

For what it's worth, I absolutely expect to gently caress up the Gauntlet even if I manage to sneak it at the ninth round.

Mornacale
Dec 19, 2007

n=y where
y=hope and n=folly,
prospects=lies, win=lose,

self=Pirates


Alas, here we are in the final days, unlikely to make the playoffs. Let us make this last-ditch effort, then, with all the strength we can muster! I declare a ratings challenge!

Ratings Challenge: Hippo Vaughn
While I would love to give Hippo a chance to prove himself, the time for proving is up! It's now or never! Hence, consider the evidence:

- Hippo Vaughn had an exceptional career, with a total ERA+ of 119 despite actually spending some time as a prospect/declining player in the Majors.
- He was not just ERA lucky. Vaughn was well above his peers in his ability to strike hitters out, and also relatively capable at limiting walks and avoid home runs.
- Vaughn was just at his peak in 1919. He set his career ERA+ best of 160 that season, capping off a 4-year stretch with a combined 147 ERA+. In 1918 he was fully 64% better than average at striking out hitters, then in 1919 he cut his walks down to 1.8 BB/9 (league average 2.3). In the two seasons combined, he allowed 7 HR in 597 IP (also below league average). In 1917 he had struck out an exceptional 5.9 batters per 9.
- Vaughn is clearly superior to Claude Hendrix, a consistent 94. He's roughly comparable to '02 Addie Joss and Noodles Hahn (clearly a worse pitcher than Joss, of course, but that was Addie's rookie season). They rolled 94 and 93/96, respectively, in my league this very season.
- Vaughn has himself consistently rolled 94 OVR in the SuperLeague. Indeed, the one I just traded for rolled 94 in both his EC and SL appearances. He was a 94 even as I acquired him, despite a lengthy stay in the minors!

I rest my case.

Mornacale fucked around with this message at 06:08 on Jan 30, 2013

kw0134
Apr 19, 2003

I buy feet pics🍆



I'm going to drop Cano to the minors and call up Appling to the bench for now, seeing as Santo's played long enough to actually justify his rating, since he's healthy again and I can find a use for him eventually.

And our doughy protagonist needs to do some Catering. I'd fire Tim Teufel as attorney of record but he's already banished to AAA in Scranton so, welp.

kw0134 fucked around with this message at 06:11 on Jan 30, 2013

UltimoDragonQuest
Oct 5, 2011



B



MLB: Davis
AAA: Hiller

Make Davis the second short reliever.



vs. Righties
3B Mcgraw
LF Hamilton
CF Speaker
RF Snider
SS Banks
C Campanella
1B Kelley
2B Stephenson

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Mornacale
Dec 19, 2007

n=y where
y=hope and n=folly,
prospects=lies, win=lose,

self=Pirates

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