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Coward posted:So the guards then ask to see his ownership papers, since Anthony decided to go right after me and no sentient organics were in front of him in the queue and it's a fair question. Anthony proceeds to derisively snort that no one owns him. I was reading this imagining an Assassin Droid Rosa Parks refusing to get out of its seat on the space bus.
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# ? Mar 20, 2013 22:39 |
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# ? May 21, 2024 15:49 |
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My Lovely Horse posted:That in turn reminds me of when I played Roosevelt, the quarterstaff specialist (he did speak softly, too), and our DM, who had a habit of playing fast and loose with the mechanics, included a very nice quarterstaff for me in a loot pile. One day I got distracted while levelling up, idly compared my equipment to the item creation chart and worked out that that staff alone, according to the wealth-by-level chart, was the equivalent of the entire possessions of a character 5 or 6 levels higher than Roosevelt was. So, more like a buck-and-a-quarterstaff?
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# ? Mar 20, 2013 23:41 |
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Phy posted:So, more like a buck-and-a-quarterstaff? but he's not telling him that.
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# ? Mar 20, 2013 23:54 |
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sebmojo posted:I was reading this imagining an Assassin Droid Rosa Parks refusing to get out of its seat on the space bus. Hahaha, this made it that much funnier.
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# ? Mar 21, 2013 01:00 |
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SpookyLizard posted:Hahaha, this made it that much funnier. Oh, dear lord, yes, if he'd played it like that I would've been backing him to the hilt. Shame it was just a guy getting pissy because he was presented with a situation where his awesome and supersweet murderbot wasn't awesome and supersweet for fifteen seconds of game time.
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# ? Mar 21, 2013 02:18 |
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The Star Wars game I'm playing in is coming to a head, and it's been a lot of fun. We're using a modified version of the Lady Blackbird storygame system, and takes place right after Order 66 was enacted. There's been a lot of awesome moments, and the characters really play off on each other. The main players are: -Apollo: Jedi Order member, and secret husband and father. -Shirraak: A Wookie mercenary that fights for the Republic. -ARC 518 aka "Sarge": A clone trooper, and friend to Apollo -Van: A cowardly pacifistic smuggler. -Cal: My character. Another smuggler that has worked for both sides in the war. The basic plot is that Apollo, Shirraak, and Cal are on a Republic ship full of Jedi, and is suddenly attacked. The party ends up being the only survivors since Cal has his personal ship, the Blackbird, and was able to elude whoever was attacking. They meet up with Sarge who is returning from a long range recon mission and they agree to work together. After landing on a nearby planet, they encounter Van and find out that the attack was committed by clone troopers, which confuses Sarge since he was outside of comm range when the attack began. The party assumes it's a bunch of rogue clones (obviously it's not but they don't know that) and we decide we need to somehow make it back to warn the Republic. Awesome moments include: -A daring escape from the exploding Republic ship including a Wookie shaking an astromech droid hard enough to gain access to the hangar. -Cal convincing a local crime boss to not only not extort money from the party for overpriced drinks, but to actually pay them to keep his illegal distillery hush hush. -The party meeting a Hutt confined to a huge bacta tank, and convincing him that they would hunt down and turn over Van (who wronged him in the past) if he helped them out. (Meanwhile we hid Van in one of the smuggling holds of the Blackbird) -After double-crossing the Hutt (and seemingly leaving him to be destroyed/arrested by the Republic), meeting and befriending a group of punk rock Wookies that abandoned their code and colonized an asteroid. -The ending of the current game: Van seemingly abandons the party after receiving a general alert granting amnesty and absolution of all crimes to anyone that turn him/herself in to a nearby Republic fleet. He wagers that he can get a good deal out of it since he has a datadisc that the Republic has been apparently looking for. Once on board the local Star Destroyer, he finds out that the Republic is heading towards the location where everyone else is, seemingly prepared to kill them all. He tries to warn everyone, but only convinces Shirraak and Cal. Sarge and Apollo think the Republic is going to come in and rescue them. Also he finds out the datadisc has a list of the personal information of hundreds of Jedi, but he doesn't get why they would need that. He gets offered a full pardon and a ship to just fly away. Meanwhile the rest of the party splits. Sarge and Apollo go off in an escape pod to await pickup from the Republic, while Shirraak and Cal wait off in the distance to see what happens. A Republic scout ship jumps in and gets ready to receive the pod. Suddenly, the Blackbird notices another cloaked ship enter the area gets ahead to intercept the pod. Cal and Shirraak figure out it's the Hutt wanting revenge, and argue whether to warn Sarge and Apollo and risk revealing themselves. This gets suddenly resolved when Shirraak puts on a space suit and jumps out the airlock...with Cal's astromech droid as a jet platform. He gets in closer to the pod and warns Sarge and Apollo, but reveals himself in the process. Meanwhile Cal is furious that he's lost yet another escape pod and his droid, and is debating on what to do. Van then contacts him through a secret smuggling channel. He had a change of heart to not try and disappear, and decided to stow on the scout ship and come back to somehow help. He convinces Cal to stick around by basically making him realize these guys are the closest thing he's going to get to friends. Cal angrily tells Van to get to an airlock and be prepared for a hot pickup. When it's time, he's going to swoop in and get everybody. The last scene of the session was inside the pod. Now that he knows the Hutt is nearby, Apollo decides he needs to go and kill him, since it was revealed earlier that the Hutt found out about Apollo's family. He sadly says goodbye to Sarge, opens the pod hatch (I guess they're both wearing EV suits or something) and floats towards the Hutt ship to board it. After he leaves, Sarge's comm crackles to life and gives one message: "Execute Order 66." The finale is shaping up to be crazy, and we all can't wait for it.
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# ? Mar 21, 2013 06:33 |
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So there is something amazing going on on another site. It is not, however, my story. Is it verboten to repost here?
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# ? Mar 21, 2013 20:25 |
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A story is a story, dude, tell it.
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# ? Mar 21, 2013 20:32 |
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The story starts out rather tame. Typical railroady DM. Frankly, kind of annoying player. Attaching the first few posts for context but... well, it's about to get amazing.quote:I have a friend who's developing a "universal" RPG of his own, and who's put together a CthulhuTech game (in setting only)to test his system. I asked about joining that game, and we worked out a character designed to test what is basically his spontaneous casting system. Then he told me to "do my worst". Okay. So kinda tame. Railroady, idea-quashing DMs mixed in with a player who maybe thinks a little too much of himself. quote:As far as consistently allowed actions go, thus far I've always been able to buy coffee without any problems. So maybe coffee-shops are islands of stability in an increasingly mad world. Insofar as useful actions go, though, we typically hit upon them randomly. He's not the type to suggest things; asking him what we ought to do was the first thing I tried. quote:We've tried this before. Sequentially implemented plans usually see the variable in question flip repeatedly. Simultaneously suggested plans see the variable in question suddenly become a third option that foils both. Then our characters have their apartment broken into or something, without fail. Okay. So now it's a bit but. Here's where it gets If you were skimming, now is the time to stop skimming. quote:Okay, I spoke to the GM. At length. ...and now another player from the same game pops in. Who's actually been in two games run by this GM. second guy posted:I am also in this game (and another in the same setting), The GM is actually writing a story on the plot, and its actually fairly good, however I have been noticing in my other campaign, everything my character has accomplished changes nothing since the whole thing is to kill a clone of the Gary Stu character. back to the first guy posted:I think part of the problem is that he really, really wants to run this game; apparently every game he's ever GMed since I've known him has actually been this, but some parties died before they ran into the "real" plot. They all tie into this grand metaplot centered around his character. I've not actually played in any of the ones that reached the point where his...alter ego...shows up, but in talking to people who have, he is "everything [the GM] thinks is cool from every work of fiction he's ever read, watched, played, or heard about". A sunlight-immune regenerating vampire telepath/seer/"microkinetic" (apparently he automatically gets any school of mystical powers I cause the GM to ban as overpowered) whose first act on ascending to heretofore-unheard-of godhood was to pop over to Star Wars and reform Emperor Palpatine through ten minutes' intense conversation...I'm still trying to codify everything Mary Sue-esque about this guy, but for a start: the mean score on this Litmus Test is around 190 (simple average from everyone who's seen this character in play taking it), when the test is only designed to go to 50. First Guy posted:(the DM is) 22. So...barely? (In case you were wondering, yes. The "universal system" is apparently d20 class/level based because of course it is.) First Guy posted:Oh, the universal system is just a barrel of laughs. It's gestalt by default, the idea being that there's a "racial" class and a "trained" class for every character, and the "racial" class is locked unless you go vampire or something; either it's some aspect of your upbringing for humans or it's defined by a nonhuman character's race. Now, he maintains that all racial classes are of equivalent power level. Some of us get literally nothing but a single trained skill from our racial class and some get sorcerer spellcasting, depending how cool the DM thinks the setting is; balancing is put off until "later" except insofar as "overpowered" abilities are removed and the cooler ones given to the Sue. That's not even counting the Sue's racial class, which no one has ever been allowed to use or see. First Guy posted:Oh, did I not say? That isn't my situation;he's actively looking to publish this.For sale. In dead tree form, no less. ...and I'll just leave it there. Again, not my story. But I would ride this one out, folks.
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# ? Mar 21, 2013 20:59 |
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That's not even a game at that point, really...
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# ? Mar 21, 2013 21:16 |
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Holy poo poo - the character's like a personification of Gaia online. I don't think any trainwreck satisfaction would be worth sitting through this self-insert fanfic.
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# ? Mar 21, 2013 21:36 |
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I'm reminded of how as a child, one could use a Game Genie on a video game to make oneself unstoppable, which was fine for when you were young or if the game just proved unbeatable to your base skills, but eventually, you begin to realize that something without any challenge doesn't really have any satisfaction. This guy not only never grew out of it, he's trying to use a Game Genie on real life. I dunno if you have any contact with these guys dwarf, but if you do I advise you to tell them to tell this guy 'No, we're not going to be puppets for your masturbatory power fantasies' and stop playing with this guy entirely. There's a recurring lesson over the last several pages that you might not be able to change people, but you can definitely not enable them.
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# ? Mar 21, 2013 21:36 |
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Quick, someone find a Freudian analyst.
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# ? Mar 21, 2013 21:38 |
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No, I don't know any of the parties involved. I hope... On the forum where it is being posted, suggestions range from "get out now" to "talk like grown ups to this manchild" to "dude, ride this out because I need to watch more of this train wreck." Oh, and a few um... ways to deal with this in-game for extra ness I suppose. Like "here's a clever trick!" when it's clear the GM is not going to let it work.
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# ? Mar 21, 2013 21:45 |
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How do people keep ending up in this poo poo? I loving suck at interpersonal interaction (just ask my employer, who nearly fired me for being too afraid to speak up about problems at work), but on the one or two occasions I went to an RPG group and it turned out to be some unwashed sociopath's personal wank-fic, I left within the first half-hour. I most certainly did not hang around for four or more sessions hoping that the person would somehow miraculously turn into an entirely different person one day. Then again, I never really got into rpg's or tabletop gaming, really, probably due to said experiences. Space Station 13 doesn't really count, I don't think.
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# ? Mar 21, 2013 23:15 |
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Our party in a game of Pathfinder ended up in a battle with a magical superpowered Beholder. We were warned beforehand that it was an incredible monster that would probably kill us all. At the same time, sneaking by it would take up time in which my Barbarian's adopted daughter might be killed by the BBEG. When we come to the land overseen by the beholder, everyone starts searching for ways to sneak by. I take one second to think over the time we would lose and charge right the gently caress in. Everyone panics. The Bard casts haste on me, trying to think of some way to help me out despite the fact that the Beholder is 240 feet in the air and I can't fly. The oracle, a battle hardened dwarf who's longtime buddies with my human barbarian follows me straight into battle the moment I start running and casts levitate on me. We know we can't make it all the way up, but it's a start. The ranger starts firing ink arrows in an attempt to blind some of the beholder's eyes. He succeeds at taking out its anti-magic eye. We're still pretty boned as the Beholder is way too high for us to reliably hit with good damage before we all die. Then the warlock has an idea. A terrible, wonderful idea. With levitate on, I'm weightless. The warlock flies under me, pushing me up towards the beholder. The oracle levitates himself, alternating his move actions to push me up as I grab the warlock and pull him up with my movements. We essentially form a mid-air conga line where the oracle keeps himself in range to keep floating me while me and the warlock keep moving myself up. My barbarian makes a natural 20 twice against the Beholder's attempt to disintegrate him and attempt to put him to sleep. Eventually, the ink blocking the anti-magic field is about to wear off. With no other choice, the oracle and warlock shove my barbarian 10 feet out of the levitate range, giving him one full round attack before he has to fall 240 feet back to the ground. I crit twice on power attacks dealing roughly around 130 damage and instantly chopping the giant sized beholder in half. He then grabs onto the falling parts of the beholder, tumbling through the air and flinging himself off at the right angle to try and kill some of his velocity. He still crashes back into the ground and survives 18d6 damage. The DM is staring dumbfounded the entire time as not only did we kill his supposed TPK encounter we weren't meant to fight, we did it by railgunning the angry father barbarian into its face .
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# ? Mar 22, 2013 01:20 |
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dwarf74 posted:...and I'll just leave it there. Again, not my story. But I would ride this one out, folks. And now you know why the only time I bring in a "me" GM NPC, it's because the group is down a man, he's at-level with the players, and he doesn't participate in puzzles unless asked specifically to make a check because, the way I describe it, he's way too baked to be an autonomous contributor to the party's business.
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# ? Mar 22, 2013 01:34 |
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I attempted one time, one time to do the "Super awesome DMPC" thing, just to see if I could thread that needle and not make it poo poo. He was an idiot, not actually that powerful, didn't overshadow anyone else and one of the players ended up burning him to a crisp while riding a commandeered dragon... It was still utter poo poo, and my players told me (in no uncertain terms) that we would never be trying that experiment again. It just. doesn't. work. On the other hand, I still get wistful reminiscence of the cleric DMPC I gave them one game, who healed the party through the medium of Magical Sports Drinks. (I cast PUT IT ON THE LINE-LEMON LIME! You're healed for 3d8 damage. )
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# ? Mar 22, 2013 01:40 |
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This, this is metal. indeed.
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# ? Mar 22, 2013 01:56 |
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My first DM also had the "this NPC is my old character" thing going on. That DMPC didn't hang out with the party all the time but:
Now that I think about it, he had me put this guy in the way of the party so his DMPC would swoop in and save them, again. Oh god the shame. Second event happened during the last session. We'd agreed to segue into another campaign under a different DM that would take place on a completely different plane. To bring this about we found a former ally of our DMPC who'd just returned from that plane very badly injured. Took her to our room at the inn and went to get DMPC, whose first words as he saw her bloody and beaten in our room was "what have you done to her?" Let me explain for a second. This was a common thing for NPCs to do. Try and cast Calm Emotions on a panicking villager, "oh no he's putting a curse on us." Saving villagers from slavers, "how do we know you're not with them." Enough for another post. So when his DMPC did it, again, I had enough and my character, up until this point a man who kept to himself, told the DMPC he hoped his friend would get better, but to go gently caress himself, and he'd be downstairs at the bar and then return home, in case any of the group wanted to say proper goodbyes. End of the story is, I made a new character for the new campaign who was outclassed in every way by the ex-DM-now-regular-PC, the ex-DM turned out to be unable to keep cool over events like missing with an attack roll and half dropped out, half was dropped out, I'm still not sure on the specifics, and the new campaign was bollocks and fizzled after two more sessions. e: a different thing that happened with this DM is that he told me the other day he was starting a campaign centered on politics and prejudice against the beastmen from the wastelands, and every PC would have to have a template, and I don't know what came of that because I am now in Rio and still running away My Lovely Horse fucked around with this message at 10:16 on Mar 22, 2013 |
# ? Mar 22, 2013 10:13 |
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Some of you may remember my previous story about Shaolin. Well, there's plenty more where that came from. As previously stated, Shaolin, as a character, was pretty useless. Most of his abilities were either rubbish or bizarre, and even his main power, Zen Archery, required him to spend 4 rounds in perfect concentration. This wouldn't have been a massive problem, except that only 1 combat in the whole length of the campaign lasted long enough, and his morals prevented him from initiating the power if the enemy was unaware of his presence. His only other fighting ability was unarmed strikes, which were laughably ineffective. So, Shaolin became more or less the laughingstock of the party. Not a problem, as the player was cool with it, and the character didn't really understand the other characters so he went along with it. The GM, being a bastard, made an "evil" version of each of the PCs, mirroring them completely. Where a PC was all about defense, their mirror image was all about attack. Where a PC was extremely effective, their mirror would be a bumbling idiot. Most of the party were fairly above-average PCs, and so the "evil" party characters weren't a real threat. Except, of course, for Evil Shaolin. He, as a mirror to the inept Shaolin, was the most ridiculously overpowered, min-maxed, murderblender-style NPC the GM could come up with. The "evil" party, led by Evil Shaolin, was a constant thorn in the players' side, beating them to treasures, stealing their stuff, and once in a while actually fighting them. One day, as the party was visiting a market town, they came across an arena of sorts. 2 fighters can enter for free, people place bets, and the winner takes a small cut of the earnings. Fairly standard-fare fantasy stuff. They are about to go elsewhere when they bump into Evil Party, who promptly challenge them to face their best fighter in the arena. The party accepts, and Evil Party nominates Evil Shaolin as their best fighter. Suddenly, everyone (except Shaolin) has a realization, and almost in unison, they nominate their own Shaolin as their fighter. Shaolin is more than happy to fight, deeply honoured by the trust of his friends. As he makes his way into the arena, the rest of the party secretly places bets... against their Shaolin. And I'm not talking just small bets. No, the party are so certain of their companion's utter uselessness that they bet everything they own. All of their money, their equipment, their horses, everything. Both Shaolins step into the arena. From the stands, Evil Party cheers for their champion, while taunting and jeering at his rival. Shaolin's party mates half-heartedly cheer for their own fighter while excitedly discussing amongst themselves what they're going to spend their winnings on. The Shaolins look at each other with deep concentration in their faces, and circle each other, waiting for the time to strike. Suddenly, Evil Shaolin lunges, spinning his quarterstaff into Good Shaolin's face... and botches. Shaolin rolls for defence, and crits. Evil Shaolin is thrown off-balance. Shaolin goes for a counterattack. Crit vs. botch. Evil Shaolin is knocked out. Good Shaolin is proclaimed the winner. Xavier lets out a small cry of joy and does a little happy-dance, completely unaware that he just caused his entire party to go completely broke. The GM can't help but laugh hysterically at the faces of utter disbelieving rage, and Xavier's naďve confusion at why his friends aren't celebrating his win. It takes all of 10 seconds for any of the other players to manage to speak, at which point they unleash a torrent of rage at Shaolin, which only serves to confuse him more, and make the GM laugh even harder. mediocre dad okay fucked around with this message at 11:37 on Mar 22, 2013 |
# ? Mar 22, 2013 11:32 |
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So, how much did the evil party win by betting on good Shaolin, as per their Reverse Psychology trick?
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# ? Mar 22, 2013 12:10 |
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The instant they decided to start trying to bet against their ostensible ally without telling him, the Karma Machine cranked open a bloodshot eye and decided "You know what? Time to make an anecdote."
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# ? Mar 22, 2013 12:56 |
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A few years back I wanted to try role-playing with my friends. Two out of five enjoyed RPG videogames, the other three were willing to give it a try despite the thing sounding kinda nerdy. We all agreed it shouldn't be serious, just drinking beers and having a laugh. If it didn't work out we'd just watch a movie the next time. I used to play with a different group a few years before that and the last thing they played was Vampire the Requiem, so it seemed like a good starting point. The World of Darkness system is pretty easy to learn, so everyone rolled up their character. Big B was a giant Daeva with all regular and Vampire points in Strength who used his punching daggers to punch through people. He made his own grenades in case something was too far away or too big to be punched. Smeijer was a Mekhet sniper with incredible senses so he didn't need a scope and had all sorts of stealth. Levi was a thoughtful Gangrel who would use kung fu and his Protean claws to fight. Walter was a Ventrue with Dominate, so he would hypnotize and mindwipe his way through problems. Pikkie was a katana dual-wielding Mekhet with all points in speed, dodging bullets and running around like a superfast meatblender They were super-powered mercenaries that just had to recharge their blood batteries once in a while. It was my first try as a DM, so my story was incredibly railroady with a Prince forcing them to do missions. Basically every session was a new mission and it usually involved killing everything in sight. The few times a subtle approach was necessary ended with a very disappointed Prince. At one point they were asked to find a lawyer, Simon Furman, who filed a case about something that would cost the Prince a lot of money. Something with water sanitation that the Ventue had a hand in didn't seem to follow all the regulations and the pending investigation could become quite the headache. The group opened up a phonebook, found three seperate S. Furmans and headed out to the first. That night they terrorized a very confused man out in the suburbs. They broke into his home, found a driver's license that said S. Furman and went to work. His daughter was threatened, his wife was threatened, the guy was beaten up and only in the end when he cried out all bruised and bloodied that he had no idea what they were talking about and he worked in the mines east of the city did the group understand that maybe this wasn't the right guy. The Ventrue mindwiped him by saying "nothing happened" and when police came to investigate the screams they found a battered man who kept repeating nothing happened. The Prince sighed. S. Furman 2 lived in a large penthouse downtown. There was a party going in and when they told the doorman they came to see Furman he let them right in. Music, booze and a lot of people. Five men in black with weapons stood at the side looking very out of place. Smeijer found Simon Furman coked out of his mind in the bathroom, getting a blowjob from some lady. After a friendly conversation about how great the party was, made very awkward because the lady kept going, Furman pointed down to where the action was happening and asked Smeijer if he was interested in being next. Smeijer happily agreed, but when the woman was pushed away and Furman pointed toward his penis telling Smeijer to go right ahead and all the other players were laughing at him. Not amused Smeijer shot Furman in both knees and dragged him through the party to their van downstairs leaving a trail of bloodsmears the whole way. Only there did they start asking him questions and discovered he was just a real estate agent that was celebrating he closed a large deal. They dumped him outside in the street, naked and still high, leaving the dozens of witnesses fleeing the party with not just a very accurate description of them, but also the license plate to their van. The Prince realized he should have known better and put them on a different assignment.
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# ? Mar 22, 2013 14:08 |
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Captain Bravo posted:I attempted one time, one time to do the "Super awesome DMPC" thing, just to see if I could thread that needle and not make it poo poo. He was an idiot, not actually that powerful, didn't overshadow anyone else and one of the players ended up burning him to a crisp while riding a commandeered dragon...
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# ? Mar 22, 2013 16:04 |
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MadScientistWorking posted:What exactly is the definition of a DMPC because its one of those issues that always tends to confuse me? I don't want to confound any kind of established canon, but I believe it refers to a phenomenon in which the DM 'plays' the game along side his players via an NPC. This is distinct from other kinds of NPCs because this NPCs is the "DM's character" in the same way each PC belongs to a player. You can see how simultaneously writing, running, and playing the game would potentially lead to problems. Particularly for people with no ability to separate their actions as a DM from their actions as an NPC.
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# ? Mar 22, 2013 16:07 |
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I heard a call for Paranoia tales, so here's one of mine. This was a one-shot I ran with friends who don't live in my area anymore but still visit on rare occasions. The story contained in this briefing is true. Names have been [REDACTED] to [REDACTED] the [REDACTED]. Special honors belong to [NAME REDACTED DUE TO TREASONOUS ACTIVITY] due to his exemplary service to your friend, Friend Computer. The details of this briefing have been lost to [ERROR DETECTED IN MEMORY BANK 403] The Troubleshooters had to go on a mission to outside to find the source of a strange pre-war radio signal. After When they reached R&D (after a fateful encounter where one of the Troubleshooters was beheaded by a low-flying Vulture gunship and all but one of the rest were killed in the resulting crash), the Troubleshooters were given some experimental Super-Pep Peppy-Pep Pep Pills to try. They were told that the pills should obviate their need to sleep for the next 137 hours. This claim was not false. They were also told that in preliminary testing, the pills were found to have no side effects. This claim was also not false since all preliminary testing, in order to preserve human life, is done with Robot test subjects. They were then escorted to an Outside Research & Development base and assigned a what was essentially a cross between an SUV and a Minivan. It had a beacon so that the Outside R&D could test their new Outside Clone Delivery System for when something So, they drove the OEV around aimlessly for a few hours until suddenly everything turned red-orange as emergency lighting came on, and then went black as POWER failed completely. The Troubleshooters panicked for a bit, because their Tech Guy couldn't find a problem to fix. He checked under the dash and while the driver (and leader) managed to turn on the OEV's exterior lights. One of the other troubleshooters decided to leave the safety of the OEV to find the source of the problem. He got struck by a strangely-textured plastic pillar moving past at about 60 kph. The Troubleshooters were mildly concerned by this until they realized that the OEV hadn't lost power. One Cannon-Fired Clone Redeployment Shell (which barely missed the OEV thanks in part to a driver who insisted on not letting up on the gas) later, and the OEV fetched up against some trees and finally came to a stop. The party decided to make camp for the night, since they were all exhausted and none were willing to try the hyper-experimental pep pills. They deployed a Portable Mini-Complex and took the sleepy-pills administered dutifully by the Happiness Officer, and fell into a deep and perfectly restful eight hours of sleep. Upon waking, they were confronted by a hideous monstrosity with slavering jaws, clawed feet, and massive, pointy teeth. It stared at the Troubleshooters with beady, glittering, hungry eyes and worse--it was gnawing on their million-calorie food cube! Worse than that, it was INSIDE THE OEV! Team Leader invariably decided that this was an excellent time for the Weapons Guy to take point, but the Weapons Guy decided that now would be an excellent time for a mandatory weapon inspection and signaling to the Tech Guy that busied himself as far from the slavering monster as he could. Terrified and now unarmed, the rest of the Troubleshooters weighed their options. The Hygiene Officer's mop would make a reasonable spear if they had any way to dismantle it; but the Loyalty Officer reminded them that destroying Friend Computer's property was a sign of unhappiness, prompting the Happiness officer to offered everyone medication. That reminded the Troubleshooters that they were carrying Never-Before-Tested-On Humans pills. The team leader ordered several dozen offered to the monster as an appeasement. Finding the pills much more manageable than the 30kg cube of concentrated “food,” the marauding beaver devoured all of them. It seemed fine after a moment, the perfectly normal beaver’s hunger was sated and it simply stared at the Troubleshooters with those eerie, neon green-glowing eyes. The row of sharp spines that grew suddenly from its back sparked with raw electricity. After swallowing the entire food cube whole, it delivered a ‘thump’ of its three-meter wide (and growing) tail that nearly flipped the OEV. Stepping over the entire party with ease, the beast fired a jolt of electricity from its gaping jaws the very sound of which flattened a dozen nearby trees. This was about the time the Troubleshooters started to panic. Seeing an opening, they rushed back into the OEV… which was probably a mistake, since BeaverZilla now associated the noisy contraption with food. Gunning the engine, they made no progress until a swipe from BeaverZilla’s OEV-sized claw knocked over the tree upon which the vehicle was stuck. Freed from the obstruction, the Troubleshooters floored the gas which should have been enough to get away from a Beaver. Provided that Beaver wasn’t ninety stories tall, which this one was. After a lengthy pursuit and some well-meaning teamwork, the Team Leader then lead BeaverZilla back towards Alpha Complex over the protests of the Loyalty Officer. The team leader then shot the Loyalty Officer with his laser pistol, prompting Alpha Complex to fire its Clone Redeployment Cannon. The shell struck BeaverZilla square on the noggin. Of course, this killed the Loyalty Officer again which prompted the canon to fire again. And again. And again. It was about this time that BeaverZilla, now grown unstable due to the chemicals in its blood, exploded in a massive nuclear fireball. Consequently, the signal the Troubleshooters had been searching for was lost, resulting in a mission failure. Needless to say, the debriefing was interesting; but none will forget the sacrifice made by Loyalty Officer [NAME REDACTED DUE TO TREASONOUS ACTIVITY], who’s repeated heroic sacrifice was marred only by his involvement in the filthy Commie Mutant Plot to create a giant monster and unleash it upon Alpha Complex. PoptartsNinja fucked around with this message at 17:00 on Mar 22, 2013 |
# ? Mar 22, 2013 16:32 |
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I'm the Storyteller for a local Changeling: the Lost LARP. I've been running the game for about a year now, having taken over for the previous ST that got tired and needed a break. (She got the position because the original ST got voted out, for reasons that I detailed in the last Bad Gaming Experiences thread... but anyway.) I'm a week and a half away from running the last game of the chronicle. When that's done, I'll pass the position off to another fella who's got a whole new game planned, and go back to being a player. I'm excited for the chance to play again, and sad that things are ending... but I'm also relieved, in a way, because some of these players, Jesus. I very recently received an e-mail from Beardy McGrognard, the ST who got voted out, who sporadically (VERY sporadically) shows up to play. He said he had something he wanted to do in downtime. He informed me that, due to poor decisions at the recent big LARP convention, his character had his dick frozen solid and snapped off. Due to this, as well as the PC's severely lowered Clarity, his character intended on kidnapping his fetch, kidnapping a medical team, stealing a bunch of equipment, and forcing the medical team to transplant the fetch's junk onto him. My reaction to this went in three stages: 1 - OH MY GOD, HOLY poo poo, WHAT THE gently caress 2 - You just wanted to talk to me about your imaginary character's imaginary penis, didn't you? 3 - Do... you... want me to... run this as a... scene...? (please say no, please say no...) The third thing was what I replied to him with. Thankfully, he had no intention of making me do that! Yet. He wanted to go the next game and see if the PCs would help him! The PCs which, come next game, are going to be extremely occupied with the massive amounts of End Game Plot I have ready for them. Which, since he hasn't shown up to game in months and months, he has no idea about. I think I was a bit of a jerk in saying "Yes! You are absolutely free to ask the other PCs for help in your terrible scheme!" without clarifying that there was Other poo poo happening. But to hell with that, I have the position for another week and a half. What's he gonna do, call a vote on me? I've got other stories of stuff that happened a while back... I'm not sure if want to post them there, or in the World of Darkness LARP thread, though. I certainly found them to be notable gaming experiences. I just hope they'd be notable to non-LARP folk.
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# ? Mar 22, 2013 23:20 |
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I can't think of much funnier than a group of Changeling players consumed by the big finale of whatever is happening in the campaign, and some terrible dude just wandering around asking 'hey who wants to help me get my dick?!' Please tell me he plays a goat beastkin who's totally just a satyr, or some other annoying concept?
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# ? Mar 22, 2013 23:27 |
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BioTech posted:The sad tale of Simon Furman I guess he never did want to live forever.
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# ? Mar 23, 2013 00:31 |
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Tatum Girlparts posted:Please tell me he plays a goat beastkin who's totally just a satyr, or some other annoying concept? Oh no! He's some sort of darkling sneaky-ninja. The unpleasant satyr-esque hedonist is what he's going to be playing NEXT chronicle! Y'know. When he bothers to show up.
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# ? Mar 23, 2013 00:54 |
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Zemyla posted:Looks like they showed him a whole world of pain. Next to their power beyond measure, what chance did he have? Like a vast, predatory bird he descends upon the courtroom. Could he do any less?
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# ? Mar 23, 2013 04:38 |
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My party is really, really good at following logical trails...even if it hurts them. I had two of my players get invited to an archery competition; prize was two tickets to the masquerade royal ball the players needed to get into. The entry fee was a substantial amount of gold. The players would compete against the Split Arrow Tavern owner's son, Rickerd. I asked if anyone wanted to place bets. The thief bet on the markswoman*. Despite cheating from both sides, the ranger won, and the ranger and archer split the tickets. The rest of the party was kicked out of the bar, for cheating and/or discovering the place had been cheating. The party later found a bunch of identical flyers for the Split Arrow Tavern. The artificer, mage and thief went to the docks, following the rumors of a printing press. Inside the hidden printing room, the mage discovered what was being printed: forged invitations to the royal ball, and posters for the Split Arrow. She grabbed three invitations and escaped the boat. We took a break, and when we came back everyone described how they were outfitting their grubby adventurers for the ball. They took a teleportation circle up to the top of the penthouse, and entered... When someone mentioned, nobody had looked at their tickets. They just assumed they had them. Then someone else realized...the ads for the Split Arrow and the forged tickets came from the same place. Everyone realized... Even the tickets they won were fake.
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# ? Mar 24, 2013 02:41 |
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Does anybody remember who ran a game with an Owlbear attorney called Beaks Grizzly? I could have sworn I read about that here but google turned up nothing and I don't have platinum to search myself.
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# ? Mar 24, 2013 05:11 |
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Chaltab posted:Does anybody remember who ran a game with an Owlbear attorney called Beaks Grizzly? I could have sworn I read about that here but google turned up nothing and I don't have platinum to search myself. I searched. Nothing.
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# ? Mar 24, 2013 06:42 |
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sfwarlock posted:I searched. Nothing. This is all I found
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# ? Mar 24, 2013 19:36 |
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Due to popular demand from my players, here's a short update of some of the highlights of our last few sessions, including a slight recap: After spending his entire life working to become a Sky Marshal of house Lyrandar, the kobold is given a ship of his own to captain. He immediately becomes a jerk, tells off his boss, and leaves house Lyrandar in his new airship to become a freelance adventurer. In response, his previous superior tears part of his ship off, tells him to eat a dick, and flies away. The party lands near a goblin village, making friends and giving the ship a quick patch job. After a harrowing battle against a demon stomach, and getting completely owned in a diplomacy showoff with the goblin leader, the kobold captain is humbled and befriends the goblins. A giant dick is painted on the side of the ship, and the party sets off for Sharn to get the ship repaired. The bureaucracy of Sharn manages to successfully extract almost 500 gold from the Kobold captain before the party can even leave the ship. Once on Sharn, they set out to make back the money with interest, so they can get repairs and update their gear and such. Much carousing is had by all. They sign on with a Battle Catering company, and spend a night getting drunk and fistfighting dwarves as part of the All Drunkards Eve festivities, pummeling one dwarf into a pile on the ground, and forever securing his friendship. The gnome creates and patents the Booze HoseTM and hatches a plan to make The World's Most Giant Adventurer. They attempt a stint of security work, guarding a warehouse against an assault from several ninjas, and their leader Ninja Maen Randy Savage. The kobold finds a turnbuckle in the warehouse, and proceeds to lay a glorious smackdown on the Ninja Maen, dealing the highest amount of damage in a single attack of the entire campaign so far. Defeating all of the ninjas, the party proceeds to loot the warehouse, (Including the turnbuckle, which the gnome slips into his new Pants of Holding) and tell their bosses that the ninjas stole everything. They are fired, and given a tiny severance package. Blacklisted from guard work, the party returns to the battle catering company, and becomes the hor d'oeuvres of a gathering of werewolves. Frantically covering themselves in bits of meat to avoid being mauled to death, the party manages to successfully satiate the appetites of all the werewolves, and are given a very respectable paycheck for their service. The Tiefling gains an adversary in the people that own the banquet hall, since he set over a dozen werewolves on fire and the smell of burning hair is now a permanent part of that building. After paying the repair bill, the inn bill, and buying two casks of infinite dwarven ale, the party is completely broke and they prepare to cast off. The dwarf realizes someone is missing, and we cut to a scene where the captain is being captured by House Lyrandar. The party arrives at the docks just as the enemy airship takes off, and joins in hot pursuit of the fleeing ship and their kidnapped Kobold.
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# ? Mar 25, 2013 01:15 |
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Wait, how did covering themselves in meat make them less likely to be mauled to death by werewolves. Yeah, that's my game. I ripped off the name and occupation but I wanted to actually credit who I got the idea from.
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# ? Mar 25, 2013 02:58 |
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Chaltab posted:Wait, how did covering themselves in meat make them less likely to be mauled to death by werewolves.
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# ? Mar 25, 2013 03:21 |
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# ? May 21, 2024 15:49 |
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Lorak posted:Ablative meat armor, perhaps. This. We all got temp HP for covering ourselves in meat, then would hopefully not get it all whittled down before we could vigorously reapply on our next turn. It was a fun combat. After a number of turns, the werewolves would become full and quit, so it was about resource management, provoking opportunity attacks if you weren't damaged too heavily, trying to distract the werewolves if they had surrounded a particular party member. It was a blast.
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# ? Mar 25, 2013 05:31 |