Ask me about growing up with a girl who thinks she's married to anime guys

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Ask me about growing up with a girl who thinks she's married to anime guys

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uglynoodles: May 28, 2009

Paragon. I have the tattoo on my wrist. It reminds me I'm a :turianass:

good guy.

# ? Apr 26, 2013 15:33

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# ? Jun 6, 2024 01:48

Mind Loving Owl: Sep 5, 2012; The regeneration is failing! Hooooo...

uglynoodles posted:

Paragon. I have the tattoo on my wrist. It reminds me I'm a good guy.

I've heard worse tattoo designs. I am really surprised I haven't seen Miracleman nuts, I mean the premise is this bloke could turn into a super man all along he just forgot his special word.

# ? Apr 26, 2013 15:40

Cythereal: Nov 8, 2009; I love the potoo,
and the potoo loves you.

Got a question. I showed this thread to one of my coworkers over lunch, laughing about some of the stories, and my coworker in question says she has a story about one of these types. She's not a goon, so is it okay if she emails me the story for me to repost here?

# ? Apr 26, 2013 17:33

Nemesis Of Moles: Jul 25, 2007

I think a few people have posted stories from other people, so long as they're good I don't think we'll complain about their origins.

# ? Apr 26, 2013 17:37

Guesticles: Dec 21, 2009; I AM CURRENTLY JACKING OFF TO PICTURES OF MUTILATED FEMALE CORPSES, IT'S ALL VERY DEEP AND SOPHISTICATED BUT IT'S JUST TOO FUCKING HIGHBROW FOR YOU NON-MISOGYNISTS TO UNDERSTAND

P.S. STILL COMPLETELY DEVOID OF MERIT

Cythereal posted:

Got a question. I showed this thread to one of my coworkers over lunch, laughing about some of the stories, and my coworker in question says she has a story about one of these types. She's not a goon, so is it okay if she emails me the story for me to repost here?

When in doubt, PM/email a Mod first. But I think you're ok.

# ? Apr 26, 2013 17:56

Cythereal: Nov 8, 2009; I love the potoo,
and the potoo loves you.

Coworker posted:

A necessary bit of background is that I am fourth generation Japanese-American. I look like I stepped right off the boat and grew up speaking Japanese at home. However, I have never been to Japan nor had any desire to. My grandfather served in the 442nd, and that was more or less the end of my family's connection to the country.

Where I grew up, this wasn't a big deal. It was a distinctly Asian-American part of town, mainly Japanese-and-Chinese-Americans who have been here for generations and a lot of Vietnamese expats who came here in the wake of the Vietnam War. Maybe surprisingly, I had very little exposure to anime growing up. A lot of parents and grandparents weren't comfortable exposing the younger generations to the "special" kinds of Japanese media. We knew about it, sure, but it was never popular. I came of age reading Iron Man, not brooding prettyboys or shrieking girls.

I was in for a rude awakening when I went off to state university. I wanted to be a teacher at the time, and made the mistake of signing up to work as a tutor in Japanese part time. I speak both Japanese and English like a native, and I wasn't aware that otaku were a thing. I didn't know idolizing Japan was a thing at all. I grew up with horror stories from family and the families of my friends of what Japan did during the Second World War, and my grandmother's side of the family were Ainu. Suffice it to say, the image of Japan I had was not a very positive one.

Then I show up for my first tutoring session. I'm told it's a group of two freshmen who are having trouble with the Japanese I classes. Fair enough. It's a hard language, and I often have to do mental gymnastics when thinking about how to say something from one language in the other.

In walk two of the most slovenly young men I have ever seen. The first insists - insists - I call him Yamato, which he insists is his true Japanese name. Personally, I doubted and still doubt that a man who's 6'1" on a good day with hair that's theoretically blonde under the grease has a "true Japanese name," but it's a convenient name for this story. Yamato played football in high school. I knew this because when I asked him what he was studying in college, he proudly announced that he almost got a free ride to the university with a football scholarship. For all I know, this was true. The guy was certainly built mostly out of muscle, and our university has a very lovely football team so their standards were likely low. He wore camouflage every time I saw him, and his skin did a good job of mimicking the outfit. If he bathed at all, it was very infrequent.

James was Yamato's mirror image. Barely cleared five feet, maybe a hundred pounds tops, and he invariably wore black. I'd seen him in classes before, where it was pretty normal. Black jeans, t-shirt, etc. When he came to my tutoring session, though, he'd dressed up in what would have been a rather nice three-piece black suit if he wasn't so tiny that the suit just hung off of him. Mostly he just waited silently behind Yamato.

I'm not going to dignify their attempt to greet me in Japanese with an attempt at transcribing it, but it was the kind of thing you might pick up if you watch anime and copy how characters seem to greet each other. The first thing I'm asked is "Are you really from Japan?"

I don't know if any of you can relate, but I am very, very tired of that question. No, I told them. I am not from Japan. I have never been to Japan. I have no desire to go to Japan. My great-grandparents moved from Japan to the United States, and I consider the United States my home. I don't mind being asked if the inquirer is being genuinely polite or curious. Most of the time, though, it's a case like this, where their eyes immediately fall and their posture goes from bright and energetic to a slouch when I tell them no. James at least then asked if I was familiar with anime. I was not, and told them that anime has no bearing on this tutoring session. They're here to learn how to speak conversational Japanese, I'm here to teach them, nothing more.

That was the plan, at any rate. With Yamato and James obviously disappointed that I wasn't actually from Japan, they mumbled through the session. I thought that would be the end of that.

Cue the next week's session. Yamato and James were back, and this time they brought presents. Yamato brought a box of what he swore was authentic steak of some kind that's apparently Japanese - I'd never heard of it. James, on the other hand, brought a very big and very expensive box of chocolates. I told them both I couldn't accept it. Maybe that kind of behavior is appropriate in anime-land, but in America that kind of thing is thought of as bribing the teacher. Yamato insisted that since it was good enough for our mutual homeland, it should be good enough here. I told him that that was irrelevant.

Then Yamato walked up to me, got down on his knee, presented a ring, and asked me to marry him. It had been foretold by Amaterasu, apparently, and our children would lead a new Japanese Empire to glory. He was secretly descended from the imperial family of Japan, he said, and was free to choose the most beautiful, worthy woman in the world to be his wife.

At this point I am seriously creeped out, and told him that he was being extremely rude and that he should seek professional psychological help.

Yamato told me that if my girlfriend - whom I had not mentioned, so I dread to think of how he found out - was a problem, as Empress of Japan I'd be free to have as many concubines as a I pleased so long as I only bore him children.

That was the last straw for me. I got out of that classroom as fast as I could and told the guy in charge of the tutoring program that these two should only be taught by male tutors from there on out.

Unfortunately, the rest of the story is less amusing and more just depressing. Short version: I ended up transferring to another university in a different part of the state, and never saw Yamato or James again.

Cythereal fucked around with this message at 18:40 on Apr 26, 2013

# ? Apr 26, 2013 18:37

Arashiofordo3: Nov 5, 2010; Warning, Internet
may prove lethal.

Cythereal posted:

A necessary bit of background is that I am fourth generation Japanese-American. I look like I stepped right off the boat and grew up speaking Japanese at home. However, I have never been to Japan nor had any desire to. My grandfather served in the 442nd, and that was more or less the end of my family's connection to the country.

Where I grew up, this wasn't a big deal. It was a distinctly Asian-American part of town, mainly Japanese-and-Chinese-Americans who have been here for generations and a lot of Vietnamese expats who came here in the wake of the Vietnam War. Maybe surprisingly, I had very little exposure to anime growing up. A lot of parents and grandparents weren't comfortable exposing the younger generations to the "special" kinds of Japanese media. We knew about it, sure, but it was never popular. I came of age reading Iron Man, not brooding prettyboys or shrieking girls.

I was in for a rude awakening when I went off to state university. I wanted to be a teacher at the time, and made the mistake of signing up to work as a tutor in Japanese part time. I speak both Japanese and English like a native, and I wasn't aware that otaku were a thing. I didn't know idolizing Japan was a thing at all. I grew up with horror stories from family and the families of my friends of what Japan did during the Second World War, and my grandmother's side of the family were Ainu. Suffice it to say, the image of Japan I had was not a very positive one.

Then I show up for my first tutoring session. I'm told it's a group of two freshmen who are having trouble with the Japanese I classes. Fair enough. It's a hard language, and I often have to do mental gymnastics when thinking about how to say something from one language in the other.

In walk two of the most slovenly young men I have ever seen. The first insists - insists - I call him Yamato, which he insists is his true Japanese name. Personally, I doubted and still doubt that a man who's 6'1" on a good day with hair that's theoretically blonde under the grease has a "true Japanese name," but it's a convenient name for this story. Yamato played football in high school. I knew this because when I asked him what he was studying in college, he proudly announced that he almost got a free ride to the university with a football scholarship. For all I know, this was true. The guy was certainly built mostly out of muscle, and our university has a very lovely football team so their standards were likely low. He wore camouflage every time I saw him, and his skin did a good job of mimicking the outfit. If he bathed at all, it was very infrequent.

James was Yamato's mirror image. Barely cleared five feet, maybe a hundred pounds tops, and he invariably wore black. I'd seen him in classes before, where it was pretty normal. Black jeans, t-shirt, etc. When he came to my tutoring session, though, he'd dressed up in what would have been a rather nice three-piece black suit if he wasn't so tiny that the suit just hung off of him. Mostly he just waited silently behind Yamato.

I'm not going to dignify their attempt to greet me in Japanese with an attempt at transcribing it, but it was the kind of thing you might pick up if you watch anime and copy how characters seem to greet each other. The first thing I'm asked is "Are you really from Japan?"

I don't know if any of you can relate, but I am very, very tired of that question. No, I told them. I am not from Japan. I have never been to Japan. I have no desire to go to Japan. My great-grandparents moved from Japan to the United States, and I consider the United States my home. I don't mind being asked if the inquirer is being genuinely polite or curious. Most of the time, though, it's a case like this, where their eyes immediately fall and their posture goes from bright and energetic to a slouch when I tell them no. James at least then asked if I was familiar with anime. I was not, and told them that anime has no bearing on this tutoring session. They're here to learn how to speak conversational Japanese, I'm here to teach them, nothing more.

That was the plan, at any rate. With Yamato and James obviously disappointed that I wasn't actually from Japan, they mumbled through the session. I thought that would be the end of that.

Cue the next week's session. Yamato and James were back, and this time they brought presents. Yamato brought a box of what he swore was authentic steak of some kind that's apparently Japanese - I'd never heard of it. James, on the other hand, brought a very big and very expensive box of chocolates. I told them both I couldn't accept it. Maybe that kind of behavior is appropriate in anime-land, but in America that kind of thing is thought of as bribing the teacher. Yamato insisted that since it was good enough for our mutual homeland, it should be good enough here. I told him that that was irrelevant.

Then Yamato walked up to me, got down on his knee, presented a ring, and asked me to marry him. It had been foretold by Amaterasu, apparently, and our children would lead a new Japanese Empire to glory. He was secretly descended from the imperial family of Japan, he said, and was free to choose the most beautiful, worthy woman in the world to be his wife.

At this point I am seriously creeped out, and told him that he was being extremely rude and that he should seek professional psychological help.

Yamato told me that if my girlfriend - whom I had not mentioned, so I dread to think of how he found out - was a problem, as Empress of Japan I'd be free to have as many concubines as a I pleased so long as I only bore him children.

That was the last straw for me. I got out of that classroom as fast as I could and told the guy in charge of the tutoring program that these two should only be taught by male tutors from there on out.

Unfortunately, the rest of the story is less amusing and more just depressing. Short version: I ended up transferring to another university in a different part of the state, and never saw Yamato or James again.

I can kinda relate on the whole, 'people worshiping your country' thing because I got introduced to the concept of Anglophiles recently. But the marriage proposal takes the cake, I mean god drat. Stalking and huge insane ego trips all in one unhealthy package.

# ? Apr 26, 2013 21:24

Corridor: Oct 19, 2006

After having met her a grand total of once.

Adding to the substantial creepy is that he seemed so bored and disappointed with her, then obviously went away and obsessed over her (because she's the only Japanese-descended girl he's ever spoken to), to the point of doing some serious mental contortions to ignore everything she said and pretend that disappointing conversation never happened.

# ? Apr 27, 2013 02:14

JohnOfOrdo3: Nov 7, 2011; My other car is an asteroid

I still like how he'd convinced himself that going up to someone and saying "Hey, it's okay if you have a girlfriend as long as I get to make babies with you" Would totally get by all her objections. I mean, duh! How could she fail to resist charm like that? :rolleyes:

Still though, your friend did the best thing she could. Which was tell him he needed to get help and then also told other teachers about the problem. We can only hope it did some good.

# ? Apr 27, 2013 10:55

DicktheCat: Feb 15, 2011

uglynoodles posted:

Paragon. I have the tattoo on my wrist. It reminds me I'm a good guy.

Yo, bitches, I volunteer at animal and battered women's shelters all the time while smokin' a blunt and being as badass as I can. Renegade fo' life, muddafuckas!

Seriouspost: I do the same thing, or something at least a little similar. Sometimes I'll pretend to be a character I really like, and think out how they'd approach things. Other times, if I need some confidence, I'll imagine a really cool character psyching me up. The only problem is that I tend to like over-the-top arrogant villains. Like super goofy stuff, cheesy stuff, (think Handsome Jack) so I can't always go with the "suggestion".

I know none of those guys are real, and that I'm not anywhere near them personality-wise, but it can help a whole bunch when I have to face something all alone.

# ? Apr 29, 2013 00:22

atroquinine: Apr 27, 2013

I cannot believe how common these kinds of stories are. I don't get it, it's insane.

I feel kind of like a magnet for this poo poo. I didn't have a ton of experience with it until the summer before my freshmen year of high school (14 years old) and then poo poo just exploded every which way.

When I was in middle school, my friends and I were really into Sailor Moon and Pokemon, and we each had a Sailor scout assigned to us (I was Sailor Moon) and we would play around, but I'm pretty sure none of us actually thought we were Sailor scouts. I eventually fell out with those people when they moved on to saner, less weeaboo hobbies and I continued getting more into anime, unfortunately.

I had always had an extremely difficult time making friends, and now I had no one - my one out-of-school friend (who was creepily, creepily obsessed with Link from Legend of Zelda but at least never believed she was astrally married to him) had pretty much ditched me for cooler kids when she moved from high school after being home schooled. To say I was desperate for social interaction would be an understatement. I was also really getting into the idea of cosplay and going to conventions, and decided to look up a Sailor Moon cosplay group in my home state.

I found one and joined up and was cast as Sailor Jupiter, mainly based on my height I think (I'm 5'10). The group had a Venus (whom I never met? She lived out of state and didn't show to the con), a Moon (the leader of the group, Bunny) a Mars (the only saving grace) and a Tuxedo Mask (Bunny's boyfriend, named Silver. Well, that's what he went by anyway, use of legal names was a serious no-no in the group, I was the odd man out on this point). There were a couple other miscellaneous members, Matt and Ryan, who didn't stick around long and thus are ultimately much smarter than me.

I had my mom drive me up to meet the group for the first time and they seemed really nice. I don't know if any of you are aware of this, but there are (and have been for some time) official Sailor Moon musicals in Japan. They're actually pretty long and involved, have full scripts and quite a few songs, interesting and elaborate costumes, and are professional productions that are pretty well done for what they are. Bunny was convinced we were somehow going to perform one of these musicals in its entirety (specifically if anybody cares/is familiar, the SuperS Saturn Fukkatsu Hen revision, I think it was called) and for some idiotic reason I believed her (despite decent enough knowledge of theatre for my age). I figured she'd had this plan for a while and already had a lot of details worked out and I would be filled in when I needed to know what was going on, so I focused on my role as Jupiter, ordered a fansub of the musical and gave it to Bunny (the fact that she didn't already have a subbed version probably should have clued me in, but Bunny claimed to understand quite a bit of Japanese and my dumb rear end believed her) and focused on the upcoming con where we would simply be premiering our Sailor costumes and entering the cosplay contest with a short skit. The musical would come later.

The first night I met them, we spent time watching the musical, planning the logistics of the costumes and they showed me the pattern so I could look over everything and make sure I was on track with them so everything looked like it went together. Fair enough. But that evening, about two hours before my mom was going to pick me up, they suddenly stepped out into another room to "talk" to each other and then finally came back to tell me they had "something important to tell me". My self-esteem was basically in tatters, I had no friends, was cripplingly depressed, and came out of an abusive home - I was expecting to be told I had made some huge mistake and was being kicked out of the group. That probably would have been better.

Instead, Silver explained to me that the people in the group (minus the out of state Venus and Matt I guess) were really Sailor scouts, or a close approximation thereof. Bunny was "the closest thing to Sailor Moon in this world" (those were his exact words) and that they had decided that I was also a member of their celestial group - either Jupiter or Venus, but they thought Jupiter. I was apparently a princess from Jupiter in my past life and I was sworn to protect and serve Bunny and Silver through all my lives and celestial guardian fight evil blah blah blah blah.

This is where I have to hang my head in shame and feel bad, because instead of doing what a rational person would do, I went along with this poo poo. Hell, I believed it. It was easy for me to believe that I was special, and to be accepted into a group where it seemed like there was a lifetime guarantee that I would have a potentially growing number of friends who had destinies intertwined with mine. I also came from an abusive home and probably wanted an escape. Who knows, the list of reasons could go on (including: I was a dumb barely 14 year old idiot).

Over the time I got to know Bunny and Silver more, though, things got more and more bizarre, and while this entire saga really impacted my life in a lot of ways, I usually feel sort of moved not to talk about it because it "ended" (maybe "climaxed" is the correct word) in what I would categorize as attempted murder (although the court called it "domestic violence assault" or something I think). It's an interesting story, though and gets pretty hosed up. If there's interest and we're still sharing stories (seems like we are although to be honest I haven't waded through all 154 pages of this thread yet) I'll be relieved to tell more of it.

# ? Apr 29, 2013 20:08

Arashiofordo3: Nov 5, 2010; Warning, Internet
may prove lethal.

atroquinine posted:

Sailor Moon story.

This is a space for us to share mad stories of crazy people and how they've affected our lives. Please, if you want to, share your story of people who got a little bit too much into the idea of inhabiting a character. Leading to attempted murder.

# ? Apr 29, 2013 20:19

Guesticles: Dec 21, 2009; I AM CURRENTLY JACKING OFF TO PICTURES OF MUTILATED FEMALE CORPSES, IT'S ALL VERY DEEP AND SOPHISTICATED BUT IT'S JUST TOO FUCKING HIGHBROW FOR YOU NON-MISOGYNISTS TO UNDERSTAND

P.S. STILL COMPLETELY DEVOID OF MERIT

atroquinine posted:

If there's interest and we're still sharing stories (seems like we are although to be honest I haven't waded through all 154 pages of this thread yet) I'll be relieved to tell more of it.

Don't ask. Just Post.

# ? Apr 29, 2013 20:35

Excelsiortothemax: Sep 9, 2006

Go for it. Post post post! We are all here to support each other and watch as the crazy unravels.

# ? Apr 29, 2013 20:39

JohnOfOrdo3: Nov 7, 2011; My other car is an asteroid

atroquinine posted:

Sailor Scouts Super Team Go!

We're happy to listen and offer support if you want it. It really does help get it down and when you start writing, it helps get a lot of things into perspective. Hell, because I started writing what I'd been through down the thread made me realize I should really get out of there. So post away.

# ? Apr 29, 2013 20:42

atroquinine: Apr 27, 2013

My bad, I didn't mean to make it sound like "if I get 100 likes I'll post!!!", which I realize it ended up sounding like.

Anyway, I'm sicker than I thought and I'm going to stay at home today so I have more time than I thought for a further trip down memory lane.

First of all I don't think it would be easy to do and I know most everyone knows this and it's been stated in the thread a few times but please for the love of god, no internet detective work. Silver is still around and with how dangerous this story turned out I don't want to get his attention in any way.

Being a guardian (which is what they called it - Silver and Bunny were insistant that even though it was basically exactly the plot of Sailor Moon that it wasn't Sailor Moon exactly and we didn't "run around in fuku" (what the Sailor uniforms are called in Japanese). The cosplay for the con was a separate matter entirely.

We kept meeting up pretty regularly in order to make our costumes together and hang out. The second time I met with Bunny, Mars was unavailable so we went together with Silver to the fabric store to buy what I needed for the con. This was when I was introduced to the out and out sheer loving insanity that was Silver. Honestly, if it had just been a bunch of weirdo anime kids believing they were Sailor Moons, it wouldn't really be that exciting. Unfortunately, it couldn't just be that. That wasn't enough for Silver. As Bunny and I picked out fabric and trim and all of that and had it cut for us, at some point we noticed Silver was nowhere to be found. The store wasn't that big and didn't have high shelves, you could pretty much look across it and see nearly every part of it, so it was clear pretty quickly he wasn't there. Bunny suddenly got really concerned and told me to wait and she would go looking for him. She moved towards the back of the store and disappeared by where the bathrooms were. I waited with increasing levels of "what the gently caress is going on and when are they coming back".

Finally, they came back, but Silver wasn't Silver anymore. He was Heero Yuy (what is with the repetition of this guy, I don't know) and talking about how he'd been accosted and attacked by someone and someone was after him and something. I was kind of freaked out. I paid for my purchase and we drove to Bunny's house. Like Denise, Bunny lived in a horrible environment that was a huge mess. Nothing that really spelled out "Moon Princess" or anything. It's also worth mentioning here that Bunny was 4 years older than me (Silver was 3), making them 18 and 17 at this time. In fact, it was their birthday (bizarrely, Bunny and Mars had the same birthday and Silver's was the day after, and yes I did verify that that was actually true) so I had baked my famous strawberry cake. By the time we got back to Bunny's house things seemed much better, Mars was already there, and I didn't know what the hell had happened earlier but I decided to disregard it and focus on hanging out with my new friends. We listened to Bunny's horrible Malice Mizer CDs and played cards for a while, then we decided to go the mall and see a movie together.

When we got to the mall we were almost immediately accosted by this weird group of people who were doing a survey and wanted to pull us into their bizarre barren husk of a mall store to sit and take the survey. It was kind of skeevy and the employees weren't very well trained. There was a payoff of a few bucks or something so the three agreed to do it (I think I was too young or something, I don't remember really why I wasn't qualified). At one point I got bored while the employee was giving Mars their survey and started wandering around, I found a large red stain in the carpet and asked what it was. The employee joked that it was blood and that was where he had killed someone. It was definitely an extremely unsettling experience, but it wasn't anything more than just "slightly abnormal". Except that as we were leaving and heading towards the theatre I made an offhand comment like, "That was bizarre, those people felt kind of off." Silver latched on to that and agreed, and I explained about the weird joke the employee had made about killing someone. That was a mistake. Obviously I knew it was a joke (just a really creepy, not well-done one) but Silver flipped out. Suddenly the survey people were agents from some Super Awful Bad Queen whose name is escaping me right now (we'll just call her Clarice since I'm pretty sure it started with a C) and we were lucky to have escaped with our lives. They had chosen us because they knew who we really were and had gotten us into the store long enough to read our energies or something. Silver informed me that I was lucky to be such a good judge of character and that had some kind of supernatural power to read people for who they really were.

If only that were true. I would have been outta there a long time ago. Of course, I recognize now that Silver telling me that was a method of controlling me - if I believed that I could magically tell people for who they were, and if Silver endeared himself to me so that I cared about him and thought of him as my Prince, then how could he be a bad person? Right?

Our movie time finally rolled around and we hit the theatre. It was some awful Jackie Chan comedy thing. I don't remember the title. In fact, I didn't get the absorb much of the movie at all. About halfway through, Silver started leaving and coming back, being gone for longer intervals every time. Finally, Bunny was starting to get freaked out, and he came back and explained that the theatre was being attacked by monsters and he kept having to go and fight them so we could enjoy our movie in peace. He was sacrificing getting to watch the movie for us.

As we left the mall, it suddenly began to rain. Silver said the people from the survey were aiming attacks at us. We quickly got into the car and drove home, but the storm seemed to be chasing after us. As we drove, Silver explained that there were invisible gundams that were chasing us, and said he woud send Heero in Wing Zero or whatever after them to slow them down so we could get home.

Other times he would "put his gundam through the car". Lord have mercy but I have no idea how to explain this absolute shittery, basically he said that the gundam existed on the astral plane but he could merge it with the car and drive it instead. No, I couldn't ever begin to explain how that could work.

It started to become clear that every time Silver got bored, poo poo like this would start happening. The key was to keep him entertained, but that was easier said than done.

It gets worse from here.

# ? Apr 29, 2013 21:15

sweeperbravo: May 18, 2012; AUNT GWEN'S COLD SHAPE (!)

It's weird enough but okay when the people in these stories are like 10-14 years old. But the ones that are like 18 and older just blow everything out of the water. I'm not talking about people who mentally call on fictional characters in times of duress to find strength, like people have been discussing doing in this thread. That's not much different from a What Would Jesus Do bracelet, which society finds acceptable enough. I'm talking about people who go running out of movie theaters to defend their friends against imaginary monsters, like our good friend here just posted. It's absolutely fascinating.

atroquinine posted:

It gets worse from here.

Feed us.

# ? Apr 29, 2013 21:32

Guesticles: Dec 21, 2009; I AM CURRENTLY JACKING OFF TO PICTURES OF MUTILATED FEMALE CORPSES, IT'S ALL VERY DEEP AND SOPHISTICATED BUT IT'S JUST TOO FUCKING HIGHBROW FOR YOU NON-MISOGYNISTS TO UNDERSTAND

P.S. STILL COMPLETELY DEVOID OF MERIT

atroquinine posted:

It gets worse from here.

This thread needs new content. Your content.

# ? Apr 29, 2013 21:35

Soulcleaver: Sep 25, 2007; Murderer

atroquinine posted:

He was Heero Yuy (what is with the repetition of this guy, I don't know)

Gundam Wing's cast was designed to appeal to squealing yowie fangirls. It was the most successful and most horrible experiment ever.

# ? Apr 29, 2013 21:45

JohnOfOrdo3: Nov 7, 2011; My other car is an asteroid

atroquinine posted:

My bad, I didn't mean to make it sound like "if I get 100 likes I'll post!!!", which I realize it ended up sounding like.

It didn't sound like that at all. Nor was that the impression I got. The :justpost:

thing is just a simple way of saying that you don't need to ask for permission to tell your story. So relax

What interests me about this is that clearly Silver is the ring leader behind all this and the other scouts (Yourself included) were his way of keeping friends. By offering up an exciting magical world which others believe in he's able to dig his claws into people, find validation and expand his network of crazy to try and draw others in. I know because this is what happened to me and what I saw happening time and again. Kry would just 'happen' to come across someone she felt like she could trust(read:manipulate) and dropped the bombshell onto them. Unlike your case however this happened purely online. So I'm sort of surprised he found so many willing people. Sorry to hear your sick by the way, hope you feel better soon.

# ? Apr 30, 2013 00:20

Mind Loving Owl: Sep 5, 2012; The regeneration is failing! Hooooo...

The thing I find the most sinister is how they said you were to serve them forever.

sweeperbravo posted:

It's weird enough but okay when the people in these stories are like 10-14 years old. But the ones that are like 18 and older just blow everything out of the water. I'm not talking about people who mentally call on fictional characters in times of duress to find strength, like people have been discussing doing in this thread. That's not much different from a What Would Jesus Do bracelet, which society finds acceptable enough. I'm talking about people who go running out of movie theaters to defend their friends against imaginary monsters, like our good friend here just posted. It's absolutely fascinating.

Feed us.

It's the difference between shouting " Geronimo!" when doing something scary but fun, and dressing up in a blood stained tweed jacket and luring people into a blue rape box.

Also keep posting if you can.

# ? Apr 30, 2013 05:53

Cythereal: Nov 8, 2009; I love the potoo,
and the potoo loves you.

Some follow-up on Tim, the 8th grader obsessed with Chun-Li from Street Fighter. The pastor whom Tim's mom sought help with visited the library today, so I asked if he knew anything about what happened to Tim after the freak-out. Apparently I wasn't the only one who noticed Tim behaving oddly, so his family took him to a psychologist for analysis. Tim has been diagnosed with Asperger syndrome and is now getting professional help while keeping his exposure to fiction carefully controlled, as he apparently has trouble understanding the concept of things not being true except in the context of lying.

# ? Apr 30, 2013 17:28

sweeperbravo: May 18, 2012; AUNT GWEN'S COLD SHAPE (!)

Cythereal posted:

Some follow-up on Tim, the 8th grader obsessed with Chun-Li from Street Fighter. The pastor whom Tim's mom sought help with visited the library today, so I asked if he knew anything about what happened to Tim after the freak-out. Apparently I wasn't the only one who noticed Tim behaving oddly, so his family took him to a psychologist for analysis. Tim has been diagnosed with Asperger syndrome and is now getting professional help while keeping his exposure to fiction carefully controlled, as he apparently has trouble understanding the concept of things not being true except in the context of lying.

That's really good that he's getting help now. Wow, a happy ending from the Anime Husband thread :shobon:

# ? Apr 30, 2013 18:42

atroquinine: Apr 27, 2013

JohnOfOrdo3 posted:

What interests me about this is that clearly Silver is the ring leader behind all this and the other scouts (Yourself included) were his way of keeping friends. By offering up an exciting magical world which others believe in he's able to dig his claws into people, find validation and expand his network of crazy to try and draw others in. I know because this is what happened to me and what I saw happening time and again. Kry would just 'happen' to come across someone she felt like she could trust(read:manipulate) and dropped the bombshell onto them. Unlike your case however this happened purely online. So I'm sort of surprised he found so many willing people. Sorry to hear your sick by the way, hope you feel better soon.

I can see why you'd come to that conclusion at this point but I don't think we were Silver's friends. I don't know that he understood the concept of friendship. I have no idea what his history was like with friends before us, though. I never heard any details of his life before meeting Bunny (they met because they worked together at a movie theatre, although not the same one he defended us in). I think that was about a year or so before I met them. From what Mars tells me, that time was just as bad. Nobody seems to know anything about him before then though.

I definitely agree that he was looking for people to dig into and expand, but I came to discover that it was a more select brand of people than I'd previously thought.

This might sound like me trying to be defensive as to why I went along with this poo poo, but Mars and I have talked about this before (long since Silver's "downfall") - there is something about Silver that draws you in to him. It's strange because he's not really good-looking, to be honest (although he's not exactly ugly either), but when you're around him, he seems handsome, charming, funny, and great. When he would suddenly get scary, it certainly did seem like something else had taken over him like he'd claim. He just claimed it literally.

And thanks, I slept like 14 hours and I'm feeling a little better.

Mind Loving Owl posted:

The thing I find the most sinister is how they said you were to serve them forever.

I don't think those words were ever actually spoken aloud, but it was a heavy implication. It was less of a "get on your knees and bring me a Pepsi" sort of serving, more of a "dedicate your life and swear fealty to me, you died for me once in the Moon Kingdom and you had better be prepared to die for me again" sort of serving.

Which is a good transition into my next topic, which is events that Mars and I came to call "Put Your Shoes On, It's the End of the World".

Like I explained before, the best way to keep Silver from running off was to keep him entertained, but since I'd only known him a few weeks, it was pretty much impossible for me to know what would do that. I hadn't had friends in a while (and when I did they were lovely excuses for friends who mainly ignored me) so just being around the group was entertaining enough for me.

We were at Mars' house again (this was pretty usual, I never once saw the place Silver lived (with his parents) and Bunny's living situation was unstable) working on the costumes for the con. Matt and Ryan were there - Matt had volunteered to be our Mercury (not to suggest that crossdressing makes someone uncomfortable to be around, but Matt was uncomfortable to be around - I later discovered that he wanted to be Mercury only because this girl he was obsessed with was a well-known Mercury cosplayer - he carried a printed-out picture of her in his wallet and showed it to me, saying it was his girlfriend even though they apparently had only met a couple times and I'm sure she was weirded out by him) and Ryan was our Helios - kind of an obscure character, but he's sort of a unicorn thing that becomes humanized in SuperS, we would need him for the eventual musical, etc. This was the first time I'd met Ryan and he seemed pretty cool. Bunny told me that Ryan was also, outside of our cosplay group, our Pluto guardian.

I barely got to know Ryan, but he seemed like a chill guy. Kind of aloof, but he was good-looking, I kind of developed a mini-crush on him.

Silver was an extremely, extremely jealous man. While we were all working on our costumes that day, he suddenly disappeared. This was sort of awkward, because Mars' mom was there helping us out and while I already realized what had happened, we couldn't exactly explain it to her. Bunny wanted us to leave and go find him, but we would have to leave Matt there. Apparently Matt knew what was going on and looked me square in the eyes and said, "You don't actually believe this bullshit, do you?" It was extremely awkward, I don't remember how I answered him. I was the wimpiest kid back then and pretty much had trouble answering direct confrontational questions like that so I probably found a way around it. Confrontation at all terrified me.

Bunny made some excuse about how we had to run out to get something and she, Mars, Ryan, and I all left to go find Silver.

Mars lived in a pretty small town of 4,000 or so people. There wasn't much there - two stop lights, a gas station, a "corner store", a very small park, and a lot of open land. The open land had a huge water tower you could see from anywhere, and Bunny told me Silver would be there. As we started walking, Ryan started idly playing with his pocket knife - when Mars and Bunny saw it, they went wide-eyed. This isn't word-for-word, but:

"You can't take that with us," Bunny said, clearly unsettled. "What if something bad got a hold of it? We don't know what could happen when we find him."
"You need to leave it here," Mars said.

That's about when I started to get scared. Ryan doubled back to put the knife in his car (he was old enough to drive, I was the youngest around by three years I think) and we continued on past the housing area, past the park, out beyond the kickball field to where the water tower was. I told myself not to be afraid because we were soldiers and we could stop whatever bad was happening and everything would be okay, and then I could hang out with my friends again.

When we got there, Silver wasn't himself. That much was clear. He talked about Silver in the third person and said that the Bad Evil Queen Clarice (I actually did remember her real name, it was Carmilla, but I'm going to keep using Clarice anyway) had taken Silver away and that he had overpowered the body. He said he was Silver's "dark side". I had absolutely no idea what this meant, but Bunny didn't waste any time and attacked him.

In a lot of the stories I've read in this thread, the Crazy Person will claim to be this amazing saiyan fighter awesome super guy who can take down an army or whatever, but they turn out to be complete wimps who could probably get snapped in two if you so much as accidentally tipped them over. Silver was not like this. Silver was thin, but he had muscles, and he was solid. He could move fast, he could fight, and he was ruthless. I have no idea how he learned this or if he just won the Geek Watches a Few Animes and Thinks He Can Fight Like Goku lottery. Bunny, Mars, and Pluto were trying to aim magical attacks at him, but I figured Jupiter could be more physical, so when I watched him strike Bunny down, I was so angry that I didn't think - I rushed towards him and tried to kick. I'd been an orange belt in karate, not really anything great but I did know how to land a kick. Silver dodged it and shoved me to the ground. For a few minutes that felt like an eternity, I laid there dazed.

Eventually, we all got up, huddled together, and launched a huge magical group attack towards Silver. I remember thinking how ridiculous we probably looked to anybody who could see us - a bunch of idiots out in the field playing Sailor Moon in the shadow of the water tower. We stood side by side, our hands all pointing towards Silver standing in front of us. When I glanced over at Ryan, he was smiling.

The attack was enough to "temporarily subdue" Silver's dark side (I still have no idea what this means but he talked about his dark side and his light side A LOT after this) and get Heero to come out. Silver was still gone, of course - as we all walked back home, Heero explained to us what had happened, with a healthy dose of "if you had been paying attention, this wouldn't have happened" and "if you had defended your prince you could have stopped him from being taken away." Bunny seemed really distressed about all of this - almost in tears. She tried to keep suggesting what we could do to get Silver back, but Heero shot down every idea like a complete rear end in a top hat and eventually she kind of gave up. Mars reminded everyone that we couldn't do anything big until that evening, when Matt and Mars' mom would be leaving (for different reasons obviously) and until then we just needed to get back, work on the costumes, and wait until we could sort everything out later.

When we got home, though, first of all, we piled into Mars' cramped bedroom (not messy or badly kept, just very tiny with five people inside, I had to sit on the side table) and listened. Heero said Silver had left a recording he was supposed to play back for us if anything were to ever happen to him. It wasn't a physical recording, but a recording "in his body" or something - so we watched as Silver basically performed this monologue of "pre-recorded messages" to us. It was extremely well-done, honestly - he spoke to Mars, Ryan, and then to Bunny, saving her for last, telling her how much he loved her and how sorry he was and how they would meet again in the next life. She was crying. And then he kind of froze for a second and then started back up, suddenly addressing me (but never looking at any of us), as if he'd added that part on to the recording after he'd met me. It was probably the most surreal moment in my life.

Bunny's resolve to get him back after that was higher than ever. We went back out to face Mars' extremely irritated mom and deal with Matt's bitchiness until they both ended up leaving for the night. Then poo poo was gonna get real.

I thought we would end up having to go out and fight more, but that was a no-go. Heero left and one of Silver's "generals" took over his body. In Sailor Moon, Prince Endymion/Tuxedo Mask/whatever has these four generals who serve and protect him like the scouts do for Princess Serenity/Sailor Moon, it's kind of complicated, I won't bother getting into the details of Sailor Moon mythos or anything, but the generals were a thing. I think we were talking to Kunzite. Kunzite, Bunny, and Mars (Ryan had also left to go home by then, kind of weird now that I think about it but he probably said he'd fight with us in the astral or whatever, I did not see Ryan again until the con and then never ever again after that because Ryan is smart) talked strategy, I mostly sat and listened and tried to absorb whatever was going on. They'd apparently dealt with Clarice before and I didn't have much of anything to contribute. Finally, we worked out a plan and Bunny tried to explain going astral to me. I wasn't really a stranger to the concept, I'd heard of astral projection before, I went through a dumb pagan/wiccan phase in middle school and so I kind of knew what that meant, but I only knew of it as something you did during meditation. Bunny explained that another spirit would have to take over my body while I was gone so I could keep functioning and we wouldn't just be four people laying around silently on the floor for hours. Bunny took my hand and concentrated really hard, passing a spirit over to me. It was Quatre from Gundam Wing.

I should mention here that I have never seen Gundam Wing in its entirety and that I didn't really understand the plot of it at all.

Regardless, the four of us spent that night being Gundam Wing pilots while astrally, our spirits or whatever went off to try to free Silver from Clarice. We were obviously successful, but I didn't hear the good news that night. Not until the next day, actually. So the "being anime characters" thing lasted for a while.

Next time, "Put Your Shoes On" and "Being Anime Characters" will overlap.

------

I realize that I write a lot of this like it's factual. I don't mean to do that, obviously I know this was Silver's Crazy Bullshit (what Mars and I always refer to this stuff as) and wasn't actually a thing, but it's annoying to keep reading the word "supposedly" or whatever so I just wrote it as it seemed at the time.

# ? Apr 30, 2013 19:20

Arashiofordo3: Nov 5, 2010; Warning, Internet
may prove lethal.

I find it quite striking how John's stories of Kry and Atroquinine's stories of Silver have some similarities. Especially in the idea of spirit switching, kidnapping, and drama for the sake of drama. But until now I only though that it would be possible to pull it off online. Silver however, is trying his hardest to prove otherwise.

# ? Apr 30, 2013 20:13

atroquinine: Apr 27, 2013

Arashiofordo3 posted:

I find it quite striking how John's stories of Kry and Atroquinine's stories of Silver have some similarities. Especially in the idea of spirit switching, kidnapping, and drama for the sake of drama. But until now I only though that it would be possible to pull it off online. Silver however, is trying his hardest to prove otherwise.

I went back to start reading through these and man, I can see the resemblance. This poo poo is all so messed up.

JohnOfOrdo3 posted:

The person that answered me back said her name was Aletheia and that Kry would be unavalible because she was in a stasis cocoon to recover from being attacked.

This sounds like Silver too! Ours was "crystals" though. He would be in a crystal. I think at one point there were people trapped in crystals too. It got confusing.

JohnOfOrdo3 posted:

It seems Kry had been having some trouble with one of her friends, who we'll call The Dragon (Who, as with most things, we will get to later) and needed to be brainwashed back into being herself, you know, as you do.

I laughed. This was wonderful.

JohnOfOrdo3 posted:

For simplistic sake, I'll be reffering to "bullshit magic land" as Spirit-side because apparently no one thought to name the sodding place.

"Bullshit magic land" is way better than "the astral plane" or whatever and I kind of want to use it now, too. :allears:

JohnOfOrdo3 posted:

In fact everything revolved around Kry. As I began to learn more it became apparent that everything bad, evil, or mearly misguided needed Kry for some reason to complete their objectives. Whether it was to possess her to kill someone, steal her powers, ruin her life for no apparent reason, or own her as a sex slave.

Silver and Kry would make one hell of a power couple, if they could stand each other. I am definitely going to go soak up more of this. I'll refrain from making big random quote posts anymore about it though.

Also, I meant to expand on this:

atroquinine posted:

Silver was an extremely, extremely jealous man.

but I got sidetracked somewhere. Probably somewhere between "Moon Tiara Action" and Heero Yuy putting Bunny down. During the water tower fight Silver seemed to be attacking Ryan almost exclusively. It later turned out that Silver was apparently jealous of Ryan's good looks and thought maybe Bunny was into him. I get the feeling Ryan got the message and that's probably why I never saw him again except for very briefly at the con (where he decided he didn't want to wear the joke costume Bunny had made for him and even ducked out of participating in the skit, so we had to reorganize the whole thing's choreography.

Silver's jealousy is a huge problem that makes a comeback.

# ? Apr 30, 2013 21:21

Guesticles: Dec 21, 2009; I AM CURRENTLY JACKING OFF TO PICTURES OF MUTILATED FEMALE CORPSES, IT'S ALL VERY DEEP AND SOPHISTICATED BUT IT'S JUST TOO FUCKING HIGHBROW FOR YOU NON-MISOGYNISTS TO UNDERSTAND

P.S. STILL COMPLETELY DEVOID OF MERIT

atroquinine posted:

I realize that I write a lot of this like it's factual. I don't mean to do that, obviously I know this was Silver's Crazy Bullshit (what Mars and I always refer to this stuff as) and wasn't actually a thing, but it's annoying to keep reading the word "supposedly" or whatever so I just wrote it as it seemed at the time.

I think this is pretty much a given for any of the stories in this thread - you're telling stories from the point of view of the anime crazy world.

# ? Apr 30, 2013 22:01

moerketid: Jul 3, 2012

Arashiofordo3 posted:

I find it quite striking how John's stories of Kry and Atroquinine's stories of Silver have some similarities. Especially in the idea of spirit switching, kidnapping, and drama for the sake of drama. But until now I only though that it would be possible to pull it off online. Silver however, is trying his hardest to prove otherwise.

Unfortunately as stated in my earlier story (which is actually on the terrible housemates thread, I wish I had time to find it but somanypages :smith:

) I have also experienced someone who tried to act it out in real life. The difference is that apparently this Silver dude was quite an intense character who had some kind of influence over others, and the person who tried to get all spirit/swap/raeg with me was a fat sad loser. The effect was more painfully awkward to watch than in any way unnerving or engaging. I wish I could say that they keep that poo poo to the internet.

# ? Apr 30, 2013 22:04

atroquinine: Apr 27, 2013

Somewhere the con happened in the midst of this. I don't remember when. Nothing crazy happened at the con so it's hard to fit it into a timeline of events. We did our cosplay, the skit went well even without Ryan. The girl who was supposed to be our Sailor Venus never showed up to the con and didn't even tell anybody she wasn't coming. I sometimes wonder about that. I never once spoke to her and I don't even remember her name.

I continued to hang out a lot with Mars, Silver, and Bunny at Mars' house. Mars' mom spent a lot of time out with her friends, who lived kind of far away so she would stay the night with them, so we had the house to ourselves a lot. We got together and made curry that night (delicious even to this day, Silver's not allowed to spoil curry for me) and it seemed like we were going to have a nice night where we hung out and watched movies/played games or whatever. Silver was really into Duel Monsters (the Yu-gi-oh card game) so I figured there'd be a fair bit of that while I watched too. (I had no idea how to play.)

I think Yu-gi-oh might be where Silver got this idea of a light side versus a dark side too but who knows.

Unfortunately that was not the case. For some reason "Tidus" (from Final Fantasy X) came out and took over Silver and rushed outside, saying that "Sin was there". We were literally in the middle of our dinner.

Bunny became Yuna, and I was very quickly pressured into being Rikku. Again: I had played some of FFX, but I'm not a big RPG fan, I didn't understand the sphere grid, and my ex-boyfriend was an rear end about it so I never finished FFX. So I basically had no idea what the hell was going on and I certainly didn't feel any connection to Rikku. But poo poo was happening really fast, and I honestly did not feel like I had a choice. Bunny-Yuna grabbed a big stick (I think it was the handle of a broom without the broom part on it anymore) and gave me some gloves (I guess Rikku fights with gloves, I have actually since this played and beaten the game but it was a while ago) and the three of us stepped outside to chase after Tidus. We did eventually catch up with him. He explained that it was totally Sin, you guys, and we totally had to take him down.

Bunny-Yuna: But... I thought we beat Sin...

Nope. You never really beat anything with Silver.

Tidus insisted we should split up and go try to find the source separately and defeat any "Sin Spawn" we saw along the way. (Those are the smaller "random encounter" enemies.)

Yuna: Okay... I'll go with you, then.
Tidus: No! It might be too dangerous. I should go alone.

This prompted a tear-filled plea from Yuna to please take someone with him. It was really clear Silver just wanted to run off on his own again but he finally agreed. Guess who got elected?

So Tidus takes off and I'm running after him to keep up. He starts telling me about Sin and blah blah how there's Sin spawn everywhere and he doesn't understand how this is happening and they must have realized we were here and come after us. We stop a couple times to fight invisible loving monsters in his head. I'm serious, I just watched basically as Tidus ran around kicking and punching thin air. Finally, we made it to a mostly dirt "field" by the playground. Tidus yelled that I should stay there because it was safe and try to hide, and ran off.

I was kind of freaking out. I knew the cops patrolled that area by the playground and were pretty serious about kids being out after curfew. And I was dumbly sick of fake invisible monsters but whatever. It was loving cold outside (it was September or October and we're near a big mountain range) and I'm there, laying down in the middle of a loving dirt field, trying to be as flat as possible so nobody sees me from the road. And I'm freaking out.

I have no idea how long I laid there, but it felt like hours. It probably wasn't. Eventually the other two found me and we all three went together to figure out what was going on with Tidus.

I don't think we defeated Sin that night, I think it retreated or something after Tidus killed enough Sin spawn. But Sin never came back, either, so I guess Silver got bored with FFX.

------

A couple more anecdotes that I can't remember a full story for (or they aren't worth telling because they're basically the same as the other "Put Your Shoes On" stories:

Silver had a habit of buying weapons. These were generally display-grade weapons only that you'd find for sale in one of those weird Asian stores in the mall that sell cheaply made Asian clothes, katana, and cups and dishes and stuff along with the occasional box of pocky. I know he had at least one sword, a knife, and a pair of sai. But I got the feeling his weapons hoard ended up being a lot bigger and nobody discovered that until later. In any case, fairly often Silver would run out to chase the invisible monsters with sword in hand. To this day I am loving astounded he was never stopped by the cops. (He also made sure the sword was sharp, by sharpening it himself striking it repeatedly against the sidewalk in front of Mars' house. Again: no police.) That sword terrified me.

This is a second-hand story from Mars but I have every reason to believe it's true: Silver would frequently make injuries on his own body and state that the Crazy Make Believe Dimension attacks had been so bad that they'd started to come across to this world. One time he was fighting Sephiroth alone and cut himself so deeply Mars insists Silver's muscle could be seen. I can't imagine this, but I do remember seeing the scar on him from it. It was loving brutal. By the time I met him he still had the cut, blood-stained shirt from his "fight with Sephiroth" in the trunk of his car (where he kept the weapons stash) too. :stare:

Another second-hand story from Mars: Silver was a really violent person, and I have no doubt that had I spent more physical time around him I would have seen more of this first-hand. At the con the year before, Silver had bought a Wing Zero Gundam model for Heero to work on. The hallways in Mars' house were really narrow, but Heero chose that spot to sit and work on his Gundam - pieces and directions and half-assembled piece of poo poo all spread out, taking up the walkway. Mars was doing something (laundry? Tidying up?) and had to keep going up and down the hallway, but Heero refused to move or even communicate while Mars had to keep trying to gingerly get by. Eventually, Mars got so irritated that he picked up Heero's gundam directions and crumpled them up, half in anger and half to get Heero's attention. This was the wrong move. Heero sprang into a rage and attacked Mars, kicking him so hard in the torso that Mars was peeing blood.

I've heard plenty of other stories of Silver punching Bunny or Mars or choking them nearly to the point of unconsciousness. (I never heard these until much much later.) But y'know - Moonlight Romance! :h:

------

Because we were friends and friends share interests and such with each other, Silver came to know I was pretty into One Piece and this semi-obscure (?) PS2 game called Okage: Shadow King (the one RPG I can get into). He didn't give a poo poo about One Piece, but I lent him my copy of Okage and he started to play it. He was living with Mars at this point because his parents had thrown him out, so they both got to play it. He convinced me that I was connected to Rosalyn, a character from the game, and that he was connected to Stan (another character from the game who unsurprisingly appealed to Silver, being a big Evil King of darkness or whatever). This was the beginning of his quest to make me boy/girlfriend #3.

Silver wasn't collecting friends. I'm pretty sure Silver was collecting a harem.

As Stan and Rosalyn, he and I went out "fighting ghosts" (with the sword. In real life. I was loving terrified when he told me to go kill the ghosts on my own because I was sure, slashing at nothing, that I would be slashing at the wrong "nothing") and he came on to me pretty hardcore. The thought of it now makes me feel really really sick. I'm pretty thankful it didn't get any further than it did. :toot:

(There was a moment where I was like "Are we sure this is okay? Is it cheating?" But of course it wasn't, since it wasn't Silver, it was Stan. Duh.) Then again, he was kind of ... unwashed so maybe I had better standards. I'm not talking disgusting Denise levels of unwashed, and he at least smelled fine somehow, but Silver had a problem with bathing where he'd typically get into the shower and just stand under the water for a while. Bunny told me water was literally repelled by his skin, because it was greasy, and he refused to wash his hair because he said it made it "poofy".

Here's a few more quick funny tidbits and next time I'll have to post about the more really unpleasant stuff:

-Silver claimed there were people living in the sun. I have no idea why or how. It had something to do with Gundam Wing. He'd kidnapped Dorothy and interrogated her and she admitted there were people living in the sun. With gundams I guess.
-He claimed he had bullets with hollowed-out tips. The tips had sunlight inside with which he could use to shoot vampires. Bizarrely he also was a vampire.
-One time he called me really late at night and asked me to tell him everything I knew about Lord Voldemort. I was the only one in the group who was a Harry Potter fan. They had decided I was connected to Draco. So they asked Draco a lot of questions about Voldemort and I had to stay up pretty late telling him everything I knew. He got pretty pissed off when I wasn't going along with what he was obviously trying to get me to back up; he was claiming he'd lived in the Harry Potter world and that he'd been a Dark Lord more powerful than Voldemort. I remember me-Draco saying, "Well, I don't remember you". I was a lot more ballsy when not in person.
-He was the only one who could drive, so he had to drive me back home from Mars' house (over an hour away) once. As I gave him directions he said, "This is great. I have a really good place memory. Now that you're telling me how to get there, I'll never forget how to get to where you live."
-I heard this second-hand, but he and Bunny went on vacation to Disney World. On the plane, there was a little bit of turbulence, and he claimed that gundams were in the sky, chasing after the plane and trying to shoot them down. (They landed safely.)
-He claimed he had materia (from FF7). They were marbles.
-He apparently lived in a lot of different worlds. He also claimed to have been a Dark Jedi. I'm not sure what this means.
-I'm pretty sure one time they had to fight invisible monsters with Duel Monsters cards.

# ? Apr 30, 2013 23:56

Rohaq: Aug 11, 2006

Sorry, but could you go over the ages and genders of everybody involved? Also, the constant name switching is getting confusing, which names are the same person here?

# ? May 1, 2013 00:28

DicktheCat: Feb 15, 2011

atroquinine posted:

-He apparently lived in a lot of different worlds. He also claimed to have been a Dark Jedi. I'm not sure what this means.

It's called a sith. :colbert:

Also, please keep posting these. There's been a dearth of crazy lately, and I'm having a hell of a fun time reading your posts.

# ? May 1, 2013 00:46

atroquinine: Apr 27, 2013

Sorry, the only reason I'm using these different names is because we genuinely thought of these spirits as real, separate people who took over the bodies or ... whatever.

Silver: 18, male, Prince Endymion/Tuxedo Mask. Also Heero/Kunzite/Tidus/Stan.
Bunny: 17, female, Princess Serenity/Sailor Moon. Also Yuna.
Me: 14, female, Jupiter. Also Rikku/Rosalyn.
Mars: 19, male, Mars.
Ryan: 17-18?, male, Pluto.
Matt: 18-19?, male, not involved in the crazy, just a creepy weirdo.

# ? May 1, 2013 00:55

TunaSpleen: Jan 27, 2007; How do I say, "You're the grossest thing ever" without offending you?; Grimey Drawer

Hmm. I was expecting more of a female presence given the Sailor Moon source material, but I guess weeaboos gonna weeb. My ex-boyfriend was also into *~*moe*~* stuff.

Also: wouldn't striking an Asian gift shop sword against a sidewalk just blunt/bend the poo poo out of it? I have a hard time picturing that sharpen it the same way a bench grinder might.

# ? May 1, 2013 01:33

atroquinine: Apr 27, 2013

DicktheCat posted:

It's called a sith.

I thought so too! He insisted very seriously that he was not a Sith.

TunaSpleen posted:

Also: wouldn't striking an Asian gift shop sword against a sidewalk just blunt/bend the poo poo out of it? I have a hard time picturing that sharpen it the same way a bench grinder might.

You would think that... he may have bought the sword specifically at the Renaissance Faire, which I know Bunny was big on attending. The sai he definitely got at the Asian catch-all store.

edit: Mars just told me Silver actually did break a sword before I knew him that he bought from the Asian store that was a replica of the sword from Blade. He kept the handle an used it as an "energy sword".

atroquinine fucked around with this message at 01:51 on May 1, 2013

# ? May 1, 2013 01:41

Visteri: Apr 2, 2011

atroquinine posted:

I thought so too! He insisted very seriously that he was not a Sith.

A Dark Jedi can be a Sith, but not all of them are. You have to be a part of the actual Sith organization (whichever one exists at the time) to be a Sith, but any chucklefuck with Jedi training who decides to go crazy can be a Dark Jedi.

I'm very sorry that I know this. :smith:

# ? May 1, 2013 01:55

TunaSpleen: Jan 27, 2007; How do I say, "You're the grossest thing ever" without offending you?; Grimey Drawer

Ahh. From a Ren Faire, the weapon quality really depends on the vendor. Some sell the same mass-produced crap, some forge genuine weapons. When I volunteered for a faire, I met a blacksmith that used a picture of one of his own blades plunged into an engine block as a selling point. If Silver had something of that quality he'd be a dipshit for whacking a ~$400 sword around recklessly aside from being a total whackjob.

# ? May 1, 2013 02:01

Mind Loving Owl: Sep 5, 2012; The regeneration is failing! Hooooo...

I am deeply amused that their is a evil overlord character called Stan.

# ? May 1, 2013 05:25

CuddleCryptid: Jan 11, 2013; Things could be going better

atroquinine posted:

Sorry, the only reason I'm using these different names is because we genuinely thought of these spirits as real, separate people who took over the bodies or ... whatever.

Silver: 18, male, Prince Endymion/Tuxedo Mask. Also Heero/Kunzite/Tidus/Stan.
Bunny: 17, female, Princess Serenity/Sailor Moon. Also Yuna.
Me: 14, female, Jupiter. Also Rikku/Rosalyn.
Mars: 19, male, Mars.
Ryan: 17-18?, male, Pluto.
Matt: 18-19?, male, not involved in the crazy, just a creepy weirdo.

I know absolutely nothing about the show besides what I looked up just now on the wiki, but why in the hell would someone voluntarily pick to be Sailor Pluto? It seems like the character that would be like your older siblings forcing you to pick the iron in Monopoly. But there's only four sailors, so that means he must have voluntarily picked her. I realize this is a weird thing to pick up on admist the crazy.

Also, still pictures on that wiki were the girliest thing I've ever seen, I can't even imagine the show, I'd probably end up with different body parts after watching. And yes, this is coming from a guy with a Ouran High School Host Club avatar.

# ? May 1, 2013 05:45

JohnOfOrdo3: Nov 7, 2011; My other car is an asteroid

atroquinine posted:

I went back to start reading through these and man, I can see the resemblance. This poo poo is all so messed up.

Silver and Kry would make one hell of a power couple, if they could stand each other. I am definitely going to go soak up more of this. I'll refrain from making big random quote posts anymore about it though.

God I don't even want to imagine the hell they'd cause. Especially if Silver's world got as dark and adult as Kry's :stare:

I'm glad you enjoyed my stories, I'm just sorry you had to actually physically get involved. It's a lot easier to fake swinging at stuff that isn't there when you're just typing it out.

Also glad you're feeling better! I'm looking forward to more of your stories

# ? May 1, 2013 16:20

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# ? Jun 6, 2024 01:48

Nine of Eight: Apr 28, 2011; LICK IT OFF, AND PUT IT BACK IN; Dinosaur Gum

TunaSpleen posted:

My ex-boyfriend was also into *~*moe*~* stuff.

That's probably because 90% of it is targeted at doodz.

# ? May 1, 2013 16:54

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Ask me about growing up with a girl who thinks she's married to anime guys

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