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FiddlersThree posted:...so, does this mean Vox is damned...? Too early to tell. Isn't SpiritArmor's Sakura Taisen LP still going on? And ShadowCatboy took 5 years to complete his Planescape: Torment LP, if I recall correctly.
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Dec 4, 2012 07:17
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Does he post in any other threads or has he dropped off the site completely?
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Dec 5, 2012 03:02
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He posted in the main DF thread as recently as the 3rd, so odds are pretty good that he's technically still alive. http://forums.somethingawful.com/search.php?action=results&requestid=6517171
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Dec 5, 2012 03:11
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Bad Munki posted:He posted in the main DF thread as recently as the 3rd, so odds are pretty good that he's technically still alive. I'd go yell at him to update, but can understand if he's just gotten burned out on this. Hope it comes back eventually, I'm still amazed Dies is still in this.
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Dec 5, 2012 03:13
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I told you guys that no one cared about this thread after I was eliminated. I was the heart and soul of the tournament.
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Dec 24, 2012 21:58
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Spermy Smurf posted:I told you guys that no one cared about this thread after I was eliminated. I was the heart and soul of the tournament. You? You? 
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Dec 24, 2012 22:45
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If Vox is too busy to finish this, I can finish running the tournament in his place, if he's okay with it. I'd also like to run a team-based tournament after this season is finished.
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Feb 23, 2013 06:24
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Hell yeah, the last team-based tournament was pretty great! I'm totally okay with you taking over here, Jazzimus Prime.
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Feb 23, 2013 07:50
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I'm so close to winning this I can taste it, I'd love for someone to finish up. that's humble pie I can taste.
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Feb 23, 2013 08:24
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VladTheEater posted:Hell yeah, the last team-based tournament was pretty great! I'll wait a couple of weeks first to see if he replies. Jazzimus Prime fucked around with this message at 09:51 on Feb 23, 2013 |
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Feb 23, 2013 09:48
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I'm all for it. Dies Horribly has still failed to live up to his destiny.
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Feb 23, 2013 17:19
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RickVoid posted:Dies Horribly has still failed to live up to his destiny. What say you to allegations that Dies Horribly is actually a cyborg fueled by horseshoes, leprechaun dust and tears over gambled-and-lost Dorfbux?
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Feb 23, 2013 18:33
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VladTheEater posted:What say you to allegations that Dies Horribly is actually a cyborg fueled by horseshoes, leprechaun dust and tears over gambled-and-lost Dorfbux? You leeches. Last week it was Dies doing lines of Dwarven-Sugar off the backs of underage Kobold prostitutes. Why do you waste so much effort trying to destroy him? Some underlying Goblin racism, perhaps? So many steps have been taken on the path of rights for the so-called "Lesser Races", but your comments reveal that we still have so much further to go. Perhaps your time would be better spent looking into the obvious use of performance enhancing drugs on the part of other, less honorable gladiators. Take Ook. Ook? OOOOOOKK!, for example. I don't recall him having such very, very large arms at the start of this tournament. And the mood swings... so very disappointing in such a promising young lad. Come along, Mr Horribly. We're nearly late for your exercise session. Good day to you, sir.
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Feb 23, 2013 20:50
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Ted the Hurty is still rarin' to go.
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Feb 24, 2013 14:52
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God damnit you guys I thought there was a new fight for a second.
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Mar 16, 2013 17:54
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Jazzimus Prime posted:I'll wait a couple of weeks first to see if he replies. Are we there yet? 
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Mar 16, 2013 20:42
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Bad Munki posted:Are we there yet? Yes, Vox Nihili has gotten back to me and given me the go-ahead to run some fights. I'll try to run a couple this weekend. Stay tuned!
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Mar 21, 2013 05:34
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Super! Go ahead and bring back gently caress Rogers while you're at it.
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Mar 21, 2013 05:36
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Hurray! Open the blood gates!
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Mar 21, 2013 05:36
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 Round Three, Match EightMatch Eight, Junai (TurninTrix) vs. Huaso (Erakko) Providing special guest commentary today are everyone's two favorite Muppet curmudgeons.  Welcome to another edition of Arena Challenge! It's been such a long time since the last one, I think I still had an active sex life going when the last match took place. Or maybe not. You can't remember for sure? Well, like they say, your memory is the second thing to go. Junai the werewolf enters the arena! She's wielding a bronze great axe in one hand and wooden shield in the other, and she's wearing a copper mail shirt under a set of bronze armor. And on the opposite end of the arena, Huaso the male human is naked except for a copper helm, and holds a heavy platinum shield in one hand and in the other... oh, dear God. Sounds like your vision may have been the third thing to go. That's a steel spear in his other hand, and it's not a metaphor for anything. It's just a spear. And, they're off! And Huaso wastes no time, and stabs Junai right in the leg! Junai falls to one knee in terrible pain! This might be a short fight. I think Huaso has this one. But Junai grits her teeth and retaliates, nearly chopping off Huaso's weapon hand! Huaso's steel spear falls to the ground! Like I said, this might be a short fight. I think Junai has this one. Both fighters are in pain, but Junai still has hold of her weapon! She swings her axe, but Huaso jumps away, showing renewed vigor! The two foes circle each other! Huaso might come back from this! Junai swings again, and mangles Huaso's arm with this strike! Huaso isn't going to come back from this. Now Junai bull-rushes Huaso and knocks him to the arena floor! Since Junai is a female minotaur, shouldn't that be "cow-rushes"? Shut up. That's a werewolf, not a cow, you old goat. Well, you're not exactly a spring chicken yourself. And what's this? Junai swings her axe in an arc, and chops Huaso's left leg right off! Huaso isn't looking too good. Thank you, Captain Obvious. That's Lieutenant-Colonel Obvious to you. Now with Huaso lying prone on the arena floor, Junai wails away with her axe. Oh my, she just ripped open his belly and his guts are all over the arena floor! This is just sad. Oh, don't feel too bad for him. Here in Dwarfhalla, all combatants are resurrected after each match. And now she's twisting her axe around in his body and... oh, he stopped twitching. I think he finally bled to death. Well, when a naked guy goes into battle against a minotaur, maybe he should wear some armor. That's NOT A MINOTAUR, you dolt!Combat Log Jazzimus Prime fucked around with this message at 06:25 on Apr 2, 2013 |
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Apr 2, 2013 06:11
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Not only is the Arena Challenge back, it takes a turn for the awesome. Well done Jazzimus. 
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Apr 2, 2013 06:17
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Jazzimus Prime posted:
Are you calling that werewolf a cow?
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Apr 2, 2013 06:19
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ZeeToo posted:Are you calling that werewolf a cow? Waldorf must have gone senile halfway in the fight. Also yes it's back and Junai opened up some guts! 
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Apr 2, 2013 06:23
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ZeeToo posted:Are you calling that werewolf a cow?  I got the big arena races mixed up. Give me a moment while I correct that.
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Apr 2, 2013 06:24
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As a fellow werewolf (owner), I'm offended by the constant comparisons to the vastly inferior minotaurs throughout this fight.  Joking aside, well done Jazzimus, glad to see this is back on track!
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Apr 2, 2013 06:24
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ZeeToo posted:Are you calling that werewolf a cow? Apparently they even forgot the races of the combatants!
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Apr 2, 2013 06:26
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I am excited for murder times! I even went back to the arena challenge site to remind myself who I bet on!
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Apr 2, 2013 06:30
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So I was reading through some of my previous posts in the thread, and stumbled across this. From Apr 17, last year...I posted:Victor- Ook is my next opponent. Oh boy.
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Apr 2, 2013 06:32
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Hot drat, Jazzimus, that commentary was even funnier with the post-race-mixup commentary. Bravo! 
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Apr 2, 2013 07:50
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I am glad this is back. Thank you Jazzimus.
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Apr 2, 2013 09:11
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I was thinking about this just last night as I was falling asleep, and was going to come in here this morning and post a snarky message, but now I can't! This is terrible!  e: Wait, did I adopt Mrs. Vox at some point?
Bad Munki fucked around with this message at 15:19 on Apr 2, 2013 |
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Apr 2, 2013 15:16
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Love the Statler and Waldorf commentary, and I hope their awesomely meta brush with senility remains a constant theme throughout these fights.
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Apr 2, 2013 15:57
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Amazing, I didn't expect this thread to come back. Thanks muchly! I can't wait to see how many more people Pinball Wizard can turn into pincushions.
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Apr 2, 2013 17:41
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Stoked that the thread is back. Next fight is That one snake guy vs pims, a refreshing drink.Vox Nihili posted:That One Snake Guy, a serpent man, has what appears to be a cobbled-together collection of gear. An iron sword and oak buckler. Copper cap under steel helm. Copper mail under steel breast plate. And, last but not least, a leather "boot" for his large tail. Close run thing, my money is on Pip, or it would be if I had any money left. dammit. Dirty Frank fucked around with this message at 19:10 on Apr 2, 2013 |
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Apr 2, 2013 19:02
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Is... is this dead again?
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May 1, 2013 18:01
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Just back to the regular updating schedule, it seems to me.
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May 1, 2013 22:24
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That is not dead which can eternal lie, And with strange aeons even death may be struck in the head with a copper warhammer, breaking the skull's bone and tearing the brain.
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May 2, 2013 07:18
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PublicOpinion posted:That is not dead which can eternal lie, Well, if you're going to go so far as to paraphrase HP Lovecraft, I guess I can do another update. even though I've been pretty busy, trying to launch a new business in this crappy economy. Round Three, Match NineMatch Nine, That One Snake Guy (Dr Solway Garr) vs. Pip (CommaToes)  Al Michaels and John Madden here, and welcome to another edition of Saturday Night Arena Deathmatch! And I've been looking forward to this one. This should be an interesting match. Tonight, we have Pip the Tigerman in one corner, managed by Commatoes. He wears an iron helm, breastplate, leggings, and gauntlets, and wields an iron short sword in one hand, and a huge steel greatsword in the other! And he's up against a snakeman that goes by the name "That One Snake Guy", and I really like that name! That One Snake Guy, managed by Dr Solway Garr wields an adamantine shortsword in one hand and a wooden shield in the other. He's wearing both a silver and a copper cap beneath a helmet of steel, and wears a copper mail shirt, a steel breatplate, and a leather boot on his tail! Now, Pip looks like he has a big advantage here. But you can never count out those snakemen. If they can manage to latch on with their teeth -- BOOM! The other guy is out like a light. But Pip is way stronger, and I think he has the advantage here. And the match is underway! The two foes charge at each other! Here we go! As they meet in the center of the arena, That One Snake Guy stabs Pip in the arm! Pip stumbles back in pain! And, and, uh, that's just the start that Snake Guy needed. He's got his work cut out for him, going against a guy that's five times his size. Pip recovers, and charges at That One Snake Guy, knocking him over! And here, you see, here is where you really see that the smaller guys are at a disadvantage. Now first of all, first the big guy can knock the little guy to the ground. And when you're on the ground, the whole fight changes. Because then, you're not just fighting against your enemy, but you're fighting the ground too. And by that I mean, your opponent is up, and he's on his two feet, and he's mobile, and he's moving around, and he's weaving and feinting, and you aren't. So you're on your back and you just have to react, and hope that he can't get through your guard while you're lying on your back, while you try and get back up on to your feet. Or in the snakeman's case, back up on your tail. While you were talking, Pip chopped off That One Snake Guy's arm, and stabbed him in the tail! Yeah, okay, and now he's really got his work cut out for him. Because like I said, when you're on the ground, it's like you're fighting two guys, you're fighting your enemy, and you're fighting the ground. So it's two-on-one. But when you're injured and on the ground, it's even worse. It's like three-on-one, you're fighting the enemy, the ground, and the pain of your injuries. That One Snake Guy tries to rally, and slashes Pip in the leg! But Pip grits his teeth, lunges, and bites Snake Guy's good arm! Snake Guy drops his sword! And like I just said, even though, even though being on the ground is bad, being injured is a whole lot worse. Injuries are terrible... fighters don't like them, fighers don't like to talk about them, fighters don't like to think about them. Because if you're injured, you're fighting the pain, and you're fighting the enemy. And when your enemy bites you and shakes you around in his jaws, you're fighting the enemy, the pain, and the fact that you can't really move around the way you'd like to. From what I've seen in all my days watching Arena Challenge, and I've been watching it for quite a while, and I've even coached some pretty successful fighters, I've learned that if you don't get knocked down or get injured, you're probably going to win the match. And if you can go the entire tournament without ever getting knocked down or getting injured, you have a good chance of being a champion. Pip shakes Snake Guy around, and blood is flying everywhere! Snake Guy is struggling, but he's starting to go limp! He's pale from blood loss! Well, in these death matches, the little guy is usually at a big disadvantage. Unless he gets a bunch of good painful hits in right at the beginning, he's probably not going to win. Unless of course that little guy happens to be Brett Favre, and he's fighting against a tigerman or a minotaur or a yeti or a whatever. Then my money is on Brett Favre. Because, I mean -- BOOM! Brett Favre! It's almost over, and... WHAT'S THIS? Snake Guy turns his head around and sinks his fangs into Pip's great paw! Whoa-HO-HO! I didn't expect that! This just might be a comeback for the ages! Pip just fell to the ground, paralyzed by that snake venom! I told you to look out for those snakemen, and, and that's just what happened! Yes, Pip is paralyzed! That One Snake Guy falls to the arena floor from Pip's limp hand, and slithers over to try and pick up his sword to deliver a killing blow, but can't grasp it in one mangled hand! And in the meanwhile, Pip is starting to turn blue from lack of oxygen! Will the big guy asphyxiate, or will the little guy bleed out? Now I'm still betting on the big guy, because big guys have big lungs, and big blood vessels, and the Snake Guy has already been bleeding for quite a while now. And it looks like you're right, John, as That One Snake Guy bleeds out just before Pip chokes to death! Well, it comes down to body mass. The big guys are stronger, but the little guys are quicker. But I think stronger almost always beats quicker. Because when you're bigger and stronger, you don't get knocked down so easily, and you don't bleed out so quickly, and you hit the other guy that much harder. Although, from what I've learned about basic physics, from reading on the Wikipedia, which is this great new website I've found that can teach you about pretty much anything, well anyway, I've read and I've learned that force equals mass times acceleration squared. So what that means, is that even if your mass is smaller, your acceleration is squared, which is even better than double. Or at least it can be better than double, depending on how much mass and how much acceleration we're talking about. So unless you can use your small mass to become really good at dodging -- Will you please just shut the hell up. See you all next time!Combat Log
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May 5, 2013 08:59
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I guess tigermen don't have big brains that need lots of oxygen. Nice photo finish, though! It's good that Madden didn't get to the bit where mass is cubed from size.
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May 5, 2013 09:13
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That was a pretty close one. Good fight, good commentating and good luck starting up a new business as well!
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May 5, 2013 09:20
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