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...of SCIENCE! posted:If you ever listen to Kevin Smith's talks the dude loves bragging about how hot his wife is and how much awesome sex they have. Like, he has entire monologues about her rear end in a top hat.
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Sep 19, 2013 17:45
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...of SCIENCE! posted:If you ever listen to Kevin Smith's talks the dude loves bragging about how hot his wife is and how much awesome sex they have. Like, he has entire monologues about her rear end in a top hat. I tried to listen to the Kevin Smith podcasts a few years ago, I just couldn't do it. It was always about him ploughing his wife. I still remember one where he wanted to have sex with her, and she said no because she was busy, so he took her trousers off and jerked off while looking at her butthole while she put her make up on. I shouldn't have to know that about Kevin Smith, but I do, and now I can never forget it because the image haunts me.
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Sep 19, 2013 17:52
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Does Jay still live in Smith's house because he's too much of a druggie to live by himself?
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Sep 19, 2013 17:55
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Tears In A Vial posted:I tried to listen to the Kevin Smith podcasts a few years ago, I just couldn't do it. It was always about him ploughing his wife. I still remember one where he wanted to have sex with her, and she said no because she was busy, so he took her trousers off and jerked off while looking at her butthole while she put her make up on. Wait...wait wait wait wait wait. How was he staring at her butthole? Does she lack buttcheeks, or does he make her apply makeup while bending over? And also possibly parting her cheeks? DrBouvenstein has a new favorite as of 20:55 on Sep 19, 2013 |
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Sep 19, 2013 18:33
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Urdnot Fire posted:It's gotta be also directed by Paul W. S. Anderson and starring Milla Jovovich. Len Wiseman & Kate Beckinsale have a similar thing going on. I'm genuinely surprised she wasn't in Die Hard 4.
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Sep 19, 2013 20:46
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World War Z did some things well and other things... not so well. Despite them even acknowledging how preposterous it was, they still couldn't sell me on the idea that Jerusalem built a massive, 100 foot wall around its entire city based on one guy's forced role into a dissenting opinion. Also, it was really obvious that it was a movie that would have been better rated R, but in order to sell tickets, was PG-13. I'm normally not a fan of hyper-violent movies, but in this genre, zombies just don't seem scary if we don't see them biting stuff and don't see them withstanding inhuman levels of punishment while still moving. Most zombies that die in the film are just shot and fall over, like any person would.
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Sep 19, 2013 22:13
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The best part about this thread is that I just started reading it, and some of the topics and posters from the very beginning are still here.Razorwired posted:Do you really want to sit there and watch a guy shiver around in a barber chair before ejaculating all over himself? I can't stop laughing at this. I swear I'll bring some content soon.
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Sep 19, 2013 22:49
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People were talking about the scene earlier: What irrationally irriates me about the Switch Dying scene in the Matrix is that they put this DOOMBADTHINGSJUSTHAPPENED noise as she's unplugged from the Matrix. I think the scene would have been much stronger had she just went from alive and worried to ragdolled, with no sound effect to show the precise moment she's been unplugged.
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Sep 19, 2013 23:16
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DrBouvenstein posted:or does he make her apply makeup while bending over? And also possibly parting her cheeks? This is pretty much exactly the way he described it. One foot up on the bench, one hand applying makeup, the other hand pulling one cheek to the side. The man is nothing if not exacting in his descriptions.
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Sep 20, 2013 02:59
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Razorwired posted:My irrational Kevin Smith Wank moment would be like half of Dogma. In which Silent Bob: Not to mention the line's taken directly from Indiana Jones. If it's supposed to be a clever reference, it falls flat, since the punchline is literally "We made the same joke as another movie."
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Sep 21, 2013 22:44
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Eclipse12 posted:World War Z did some things well and other things... not so well. Despite them even acknowledging how preposterous it was, they still couldn't sell me on the idea that Jerusalem built a massive, 100 foot wall around its entire city based on one guy's forced role into a dissenting opinion. Israel is kind of well known for building giant walls specifically to keep out the undesirables, even when they're still technically human and not really a danger to anybody. I could believe that Israel wouldn't take much prodding to build a big wall to keep out zombies. It's weird symbolically, but it's not exactly outlandish.
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Sep 22, 2013 06:52
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I just saw Prisoners, and the way that the big reveal was played was so poorly done. It's supposed to be dramatic and all, but the way the buildup was done it was obvious from the beginning, which made it into Grim Scooby Doo. Yes, it was old lady Jenkins all along! I just couldn't take anything seriously after that point, despite the fact that it was supposed to be the tensest part of the film.
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Sep 22, 2013 08:00
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Talking with a friend today and he reminded me of one. The ending to VHS 2. Good god what a poo poo ending. Not exactly a steller movie to begin with but that douchebag college kid giving the thumbs up with no jaw was just loving RETARDED. I can't recall much about the movie other than the obligatory boobs in the first setup (and no, I did not mind them), but that ending just pissed me off so loving much it killed me even buying the bluray or the combo with the vhs tape.
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Sep 22, 2013 10:37
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Stupid_Sexy_Flander posted:Talking with a friend today and he reminded me of one. I love horror. And I thought VHS was such a great find on Netflix. I really enjoyed the stories and short scenarios. Kept my interest. But the stories in VHS2 just fell terribly flat I felt and were dragged on long long long.
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Sep 22, 2013 15:00
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Modern Day Hercules posted:Israel is kind of well known for building giant walls specifically to keep out the undesirables, even when they're still technically human and not really a danger to anybody. I could believe that Israel wouldn't take much prodding to build a big wall to keep out zombies. It's weird symbolically, but it's not exactly outlandish. The big problem was the same as what War of the Worlds suffered from, where you had this big earth-shaking disaster in which people are dying by the millions and somehow the single protagonist the movie picked to focus on wanders through it completely unharmed while doing pivotal things. In that scene in WWZ, the Israelis have built that giant wall, station soldiers all around it, and somehow of all the people there guarding the wall none of them notice the zombies climbing over it until Brad Motherfucking Pitt calls their attention to it. Thanks, Brad!
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Sep 22, 2013 17:11
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Phanatic posted:The big problem was the same as what War of the Worlds suffered from, where you had this big earth-shaking disaster in which people are dying by the millions and somehow the single protagonist the movie picked to focus on wanders through it completely unharmed while doing pivotal things. In that scene in WWZ, the Israelis have built that giant wall, station soldiers all around it, and somehow of all the people there guarding the wall none of them notice the zombies climbing over it until Brad Motherfucking Pitt calls their attention to it. Thanks, Brad! It all just plugs into the really annoying thing many (bad) movies do - instead of trying to elevate the hero by making him good at whatever, they just make everyone else be an idiot. Its like they populate the movie with people from infomercials in a sad attempt to disguise the fact that they can't write an interesting or competent protagonist. Then again, World War Z was written by Lindelof, who couldn't put together a coherent script to save his life. Two things, about the ending really: How in the gently caress do zombies sense terminal diseases? Does the undead state give them Detect Sickness with a 50' range or something? How is that supposed to even work? Second, why does it matter? "A virus needs a healthy host to spread" is a bullshit justification when its a zombie virus that animates corpses. Some terminally ill dude is going to be just as corpse-y if a zombie rips his throat out as he would in a week from his cancer or whatever. Oh, and another thing - how do the zombies discriminate between people noises and zombie noises? In the WHO laboratory at the end they make a big deal about zombies being attracted to sound, but they only perk up and pursue sounds the humans make. How do they tell the difference? Shouldn't they be swarming every time one of their shuffling undead number crunches on some broken glass? Super annoying because in the book they were attracted to all sound, which make them more dangerous because they'd daisy chain huge swarms via their moans.
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Sep 22, 2013 17:32
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LeJackal posted:
They said something early on in the film which made me expect the rest of the film to be poo poo, and I was right. We find out that, in a huge departure from the book, the zombie virus turns someone from normal to Zed in about 10 seconds. Then a character points out that the reason it spread to every country so fast is that the "airlines were the perfect delivery mechanism." What the gently caress? That works if it's a slow virus, like in the book, because someone who's infected can board a plane, get to where he's going, and then turn into a zombie But when it works in 10 seconds, how the gently caress does a zombie get on a plane and then the plane take off? TSA's lovely, but it's not so lovely that it's going to let some guy through the security gate who's trying to eat the other travelers.
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Sep 22, 2013 18:33
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Phanatic posted:They said something early on in the film which made me expect the rest of the film to be poo poo, and I was right. Later on in the movie he finds out his whole 10 second theory was wrong when he bumps into a couple of scientists who tell him some people took a while longer to change. Also non-active carriers could have been a thing.
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Sep 22, 2013 18:35
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Also, the last third of the film was rushed and lovely because they had to re-do it from the ground up, more or less, because of some stupid issue where the original ending they had written and mostly shot was no longer usable.
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Sep 22, 2013 18:42
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Bertrand Hustle posted:Also, the last third of the film was rushed and lovely because they had to re-do it from the ground up, more or less, because of some stupid issue where the original ending they had written and mostly shot was no longer usable. The book is worth reading, if anyone who's only seen the film is wondering. The entire Israel section of the book is eyerolling as hell and there's a lot of USA USA USA, but otherwise it's a good read.
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Sep 22, 2013 18:51
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The original ending had nothing to do with the whole intentional infecting disease thing. Instead on the plane Pitt ends up in Russia where he's conscripted into a zombie killing army. Skip ahead some number of months and his family is living in a relocation camp in Florida with Matthew Fox (who is in the finished movie for like 2 seconds) having a relationship with the mother. Pitt is still in Russia and there's a whole battle for Moscow scene (which you can see for a bit in the finished movie with those urban battle scenes) and Pitt discovers that the cold is slowing the zombies down. He eventually escapes Russia on a freighter with the Israeli soldier woman and another character and the movie ends with them landing in Oregon. So basically the original ending didn't actually have an ending plus didn't have a "solution" to the zombie problem.
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Sep 22, 2013 19:03
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Nemesis Of Moles posted:Later on in the movie he finds out his whole 10 second theory was wrong when he bumps into a couple of scientists who tell him some people took a while longer to change. I missed that bit, but in that case then it's really lucky that none of those people made it into any of the safe zones we were shown because there didn't seem to be any sort of quarantine period at all, and neither were there any inspections to see if people had been bitten or wounded prior to admitting them into those safe zones. Probably the Brad Pitt effect again. Splicer posted:This sounds intriguing... The book is nothing like the movie at all. I know that's been pointed out, but I'll be more specific. The book's a takeoff on Studs Terkel's oral history of WWII, _The Good War_, in which he interviews a cross-section of people who were involved, everything from conscientious objectors to Japanese-Americans who lived in the interment camps to Soviet soldiers to Japanese survivors of Hiroshima. So in the book, you've got interviews with soliders, politicians, humanitarians, UN administrators, and so on, and it's not so much about killing zombies as it is about the social and political repercussions of the war. Like, rich people start fleeing Miami via anything that floats so they can escape to Cuba. One of the best parts is the Battle of Yonkers, were the military's tendency to always fight the last war doesn't go so well when the current war is against zombie hordes who don't notice little things like artillery fragments, and later on how militaries learn to deal with the zombies effectively and can start sanitizing areas. It's worth a read, the movie's just a zombie-disaster film that happens to include Brad Pitt. Seriously, one of the worst conversions of novel to movie that I can remember seeing. It's execrable. Phanatic has a new favorite as of 19:38 on Sep 22, 2013 |
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Sep 22, 2013 19:35
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I was watching Brokeback Mountain on Netflix and the scene where the two main characters have anal sex in a tent was pretty cringeworthy. I just kept wondering if the next scene would have them in the hospital.
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Sep 22, 2013 19:45
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Phanatic posted:I missed that bit, but in that case then it's really lucky that none of those people made it into any of the safe zones we were shown because there didn't seem to be any sort of quarantine period at all, and neither were there any inspections to see if people had been bitten or wounded prior to admitting them into those safe zones. Probably the Brad Pitt effect again. The book is pretty poorly written and not very smart, though, so the movie and book are actually fairly similar in character.
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Sep 22, 2013 20:03
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I was watching The Last Exorcism last night. I'm not a horror film/found footage aficionado but I really feel that if you're doing found footage then you should commit to it and do it loving right or not at all. In this film there is a documentary crew following an exorcist and they have one cameraman and one camera and yet during scenes the shot cuts endlessly to different angles in a way that would have been physically impossible for that guy to film, unless he's a teleporting mutant. During one scene there is some devil possession poo poo going on and cameraman is filming continually as the action happens, yet the shot cuts from a close up of the exorcist's face from the side, then a worms eye view from the front, then cutting to a higher shot of the documentary maker's face and then to the devil possession poo poo and so on. The sound makes it clear the action is unbroken and continual. Also, even when serious demon possession poo poo going on, shotgun maniacs and death threats are flying about the cameraman still takes time out to film establishing shots. Every time an establishing shot of the scary scene comes up I'm thinking 'seriously? In a life or death situation your still filming establishing shots??? This guy is a PRO I guess.'
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Sep 22, 2013 20:05
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tagelthebagel posted:I love horror. And I thought VHS was such a great find on Netflix. I really enjoyed the stories and short scenarios. Kept my interest. But the stories in VHS2 just fell terribly flat I felt and were dragged on long long long. IIRC the cult one was so god damned long it was just boring as hell. I remember the first one being kinda ok (boobs helped, but the whole eye thing was nifty). The others were just  . If they would have edited the segments down to a decent length where they weren't a chore to watch, the movie would have been a lot snappier, and they could have had another segment in there. That last one with the farm went on wayyyyyy toooooo llllooooooooonnnnnnggggggggg.Cream_Filling posted:The book is pretty poorly written and not very smart, though, so the movie and book are actually fairly similar in character. WWZ was basically "Brad Pitt as Death : The Horseman" because EVERYWHERE he went, everyone died. On a plane with him? You are hosed. In a secure camp? hosed. In a big loving fortress with armed men and ammo a plenty? FFFFUUUUCCCKKKKEEEDDDD. The book was decent, not great, but holy poo poo the movie was horrible.
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Sep 22, 2013 20:13
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Cream_Filling posted:The book is pretty poorly written and not very smart, though, so the movie and book are actually fairly similar in character. If people are complaining about the tactical realism of the movie then the book is going to give them a conniption: a teenage nerd killing vast swaths of zombies with his Hanzo steel, the military acting like complete idiots in a way that would make even the most contemptuous armchair general roll his eyes, and and the author skipping from zombies being a thing that exists to an apocalyptic planet-wide occupation because he admits he couldn't figure out a believable way to make that happen with slow zombies are all way sillier and slapdash than a random grunt being completely wrong about how the zombie infection works.
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Sep 22, 2013 20:15
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Dr Scoofles posted:In this film there is a documentary crew following an exorcist and they have one cameraman and one camera and yet during scenes the shot cuts endlessly to different angles in a way that would have been physically impossible for that guy to film, unless he's a teleporting mutant. Another thing that bugs me in found footage type films is when there's music in a scene and it doesn't get cut when the camera cuts. That's some sloppy editing right there on the filmmakers' part.
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Sep 22, 2013 20:19
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...of SCIENCE! posted:If people are complaining about the tactical realism of the movie then the book is going to give them a conniption: a teenage nerd killing vast swaths of zombies with his Hanzo steel, the military acting like complete idiots in a way that would make even the most contemptuous armchair general roll his eyes, and and the author skipping from zombies being a thing that exists to an apocalyptic planet-wide occupation because he admits he couldn't figure out a believable way to make that happen with slow zombies are all way sillier and slapdash than a random grunt being completely wrong about how the zombie infection works. Well the book is a sequel to a joke book. I assumed that it wasn't meant to be serious. But the things that annoyed me were the awful cultural caricatures, wooden writing, terrible attempts at "social commentary," and the general sense that the writer had read a bunch of reference books and regurgitated the contents without actually understanding anything. Oh and also it wasn't actually very funny or enjoyable to read. Seriously, I've read better character writing and voice in college creative writing exercises.
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Sep 22, 2013 20:32
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The audio book is really good though. Alan Alda voices the President segments. e: and Wiki says John Turturro and Mark Hamill also do voices.
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Sep 22, 2013 20:39
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Mu Zeta posted:The audio book is really good though. Alan Alda voices the President segments. I haven't listened to it so I can't comment, but the phrase "gilding a turd" comes to mind.
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Sep 22, 2013 20:43
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Phanatic posted:They said something early on in the film which made me expect the rest of the film to be poo poo, and I was right. It's funny they did that, then, since one of the movies that started the whole zombie revival had the virus that turned people quickly, which is the in-movie reason as to why it stayed localized to England. Man, I gotta see 28 Days Later again. That movie owns. ...of SCIENCE! posted:If people are complaining about the tactical realism of the movie then the book is going to give them a conniption: a teenage nerd killing vast swaths of zombies with his Hanzo steel, the military acting like complete idiots in a way that would make even the most contemptuous armchair general roll his eyes, and and the author skipping from zombies being a thing that exists to an apocalyptic planet-wide occupation because he admits he couldn't figure out a believable way to make that happen with slow zombies are all way sillier and slapdash than a random grunt being completely wrong about how the zombie infection works. I don't think it's so much a "tactical realism" complaint as things not being internally consistent (the zombies being super-sensitive to noise- as long as it's made by humans. They just know!) or really goddamn nonsensical (every soldier on the wall not noticing a big ol' rush of zombies, even though they're all on watch duty).
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Sep 22, 2013 20:48
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Ugly In The Morning posted:It's funny they did that, then, since one of the movies that started the whole zombie revival had the virus that turned people quickly, which is the in-movie reason as to why it stayed localized to England. Not a zombie movie, because people are still alive in it, but it still owns. World War Z felt kind of like a slap-dash sequel to it, since they had fast running things and the same weird twitchy infection situation.
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Sep 22, 2013 21:02
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...of SCIENCE! posted:If people are complaining about the tactical realism of the movie then the book is going to give them a conniption: a teenage nerd killing vast swaths of zombies with his Hanzo steel, Everything else you said is fair, and far from the only things wrong with that book, but no a teenage nerd did not kill vast swaths of Zombies with his Hanzo steel. e: For content. I watch Oblivion a while back, and after their trojan drone gets shot up everyone just shrugs and says "Well guess we're hosed". But the reason it got shot up because three more drones flew in and shot it. These same three drones are still in the base, all disabled and mostly intact, as is a guy who's entire job is repairing drones. Why didn't they just build another trojan drone? Splicer has a new favorite as of 22:36 on Sep 22, 2013 |
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Sep 22, 2013 22:08
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Krypt-OOO-Nite!! posted:Watching End of Watch at the moment and did they really need the whole stupid wearing minicams etc. I got really irritated that at the beginning Jake Gyllenhaal is listing all of his equipement, and he says his knife is a Spyderco so and so, when it clearly has the S&W logo on it. It can't be that hard!!
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Sep 22, 2013 22:39
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Dr Scoofles posted:I was watching The Last Exorcism last night. I'm not a horror film/found footage aficionado but I really feel that if you're doing found footage then you should commit to it and do it loving right or not at all. In this film there is a documentary crew following an exorcist and they have one cameraman and one camera and yet during scenes the shot cuts endlessly to different angles in a way that would have been physically impossible for that guy to film, unless he's a teleporting mutant. During one scene there is some devil possession poo poo going on and cameraman is filming continually as the action happens, yet the shot cuts from a close up of the exorcist's face from the side, then a worms eye view from the front, then cutting to a higher shot of the documentary maker's face and then to the devil possession poo poo and so on. The sound makes it clear the action is unbroken and continual. They do goof up a bit though. The sound guys keep getting killed, and whenever one dies, they insert a little post-production tribute speech. At the end, the entire crew gets murdered, camera drops to the ground and just films until it runs out, cue credits. Nice way to end it, but now who is supposed to have done the final editing and how did they know or care to put in those tributes?
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Sep 22, 2013 23:01
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I still need to get around to finishing that. Something about French and B&W combined just kills me, and I can't explain it. On their own, no problems, and lots of great movies I've watched. Together, I just can't keep my attention. I have a weird attraction to found footage films. They're almost universally bad, yet I can't stop finding and watching them. Regarding Last Exorcist, it's one of the better ones, which makes all the problems with it all the more glaring. My worst complaint was how much the ending ripped off Cannibal Holocaust, while Eli Roth spent the week it came out talking about how brave and original the ending was on twitter. In case you didn't know, Cannibal Holocaust is pretty much the first FF film, and Roth claims to be a bit of an expert/fan of the film, and has provided commentaries for DVD releases. Though that did lead to the cute moment of him casting director Ruggero Deodato in a cameo role in Hostel 2 as the "Italian Cannibal"!
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Sep 23, 2013 16:51
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Cream_Filling posted:The book is pretty poorly written and not very smart, though, so the movie and book are actually fairly similar in character.
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Sep 23, 2013 20:01
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Choco1980 posted:I still need to get around to finishing that. Something about French and B&W combined just kills me, and I can't explain it. On their own, no problems, and lots of great movies I've watched. Together, I just can't keep my attention. While I agree with this sentiment wholly, La Haine is probably one of the best movies I've ever seen and you owe yourself a watch if you've avoided it.
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Sep 23, 2013 21:32
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Dr Scoofles posted:I was watching The Last Exorcism last night. I'm not a horror film/found footage aficionado but I really feel that if you're doing found footage then you should commit to it and do it loving right or not at all. In this film there is a documentary crew following an exorcist and they have one cameraman and one camera and yet during scenes the shot cuts endlessly to different angles in a way that would have been physically impossible for that guy to film, unless he's a teleporting mutant. During one scene there is some devil possession poo poo going on and cameraman is filming continually as the action happens, yet the shot cuts from a close up of the exorcist's face from the side, then a worms eye view from the front, then cutting to a higher shot of the documentary maker's face and then to the devil possession poo poo and so on. The sound makes it clear the action is unbroken and continual. That's one of the things that annoyed me about District 9 (that, and the entirely unsympathetic protagonist.) It starts out like a found footage/mock-documentary, but it's like ten minutes in the director suddenly realizes that he can't effectivly tell his story in that way, so he drops it. Oh, except in the moments where he thinks it would look cool. You can't jump around like that. Pick one way, and commit to it. Oh, and the precocious alien kid. I was already disliking the film, but then you have to introduce that? Ugh.
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Sep 23, 2013 22:20
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