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My grandma just died a little over a month ago. We told my son (who will be 3 on Tuesday) that her body was too sick for the doctors to fix it and that she had died, just like plants die and fish die and everything that is alive will eventually die. He accepted it well enough. I liked this book as a helper http://www.amazon.com/Lifetimes-Beautiful-Explain-Death-Children/dp/0553344021
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Oct 18, 2013 14:32
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I ended up having the death talk after my oldest in Kindergarten brought this book home from the library at school. Since my husband is a Catholic-ish deist and I'm in a weird place with the whole religion thing, I didn't have too many issues with all the heavenly aspects depicted in the book as they're very generically spiritual. I seem to remember telling my daughter that we couldn't know what happens when we die because no one ever comes back to tell us what it's like. Her primary concern seemed to be a reassurance that she or I (or anyone else in our family, for that matter) wouldn't be dying anytime in the next few days or so. We then had a talk about life expectancy, and how cats have much shorter lives than people so while our cat Suzaku was getting old and could potentially die soon, the rest of our family statistically had a while to go, and she especially had a long expectancy ahead of her. (Side note- today Suzaku is still alive and grumpy as she always was at a ripe 18 years of age).TacoNight posted:A different question: my 20 month-old seems much less outgoing and social than most of the other kids in her various play groups. Of course, sharing is hard, but she doesn't like other kids to be nearby. While on the playground equipment, she was standing on one platform connected to another by a tunnel. As another kid she knows got on the platform, it was "Away Ella!" and she melted down crying when Ella had the audacity to crawl through the tunnel to the same platform. This got lost in the death chat so I wanted to quote it again for you. At only 20 months I wouldn't worry about it too much- that's still the age where "playing together" means "playing in proximity to each other but not really interacting in a meaningful way". Your daughter is at the age where she's wanting to start playing and interacting with other kids, but she's still very self-absorbed and hasn't fully grasped that other kids have their own agency. So, when they do things that don't fit her mental script for how the interaction is "supposed" to go she gets sulky. She will grow out of it eventually, but playing games with your daughter where you have to take turns always helps.
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Oct 18, 2013 14:40
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Thanks for the suggestions. The Sagan idea will work well for him, I think.
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Oct 18, 2013 17:58
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I posted before because our son hated his daycare so much. He still bawls when getting dropped off, but calms down very shortly thereafter. He is super happy to go home at the end of the day, and so is our daughter. Here's the situation: I've been working very part time for the past 3 years while being the main source of our childcare. However, our daughter is now almost 3.5 so we wanted them in preschool asap. Our son is just 2. At 3 days per week, the center we chose, which was competitively priced for our area, will eat up the majority of my paycheck at a job I'm starting next week. The remainder of my check will go to transportation costs and giving my mother some money for watching our kids the other 2 days per week. I'll essentially be taking home nothing. At least, at first...the company promises fast promotions and pay increases. The job is a reasonable offer for me considering I've not been my field for 3 years. Also the job experience should lead to significantly better opportunities in the future. The concern I have essentially is this: is it worth my working solely for the purpose of paying for preschool? Is it *that* beneficial? The other option would be for me to get a PT night/weekend job and send them to a preschool for just a few hours per week, which is way way cheaper. The drawback to this, is that it's not a good career move. The job I'm taking at least puts me on a path to be earning good money in a year or two's time. If I wait another year or two before trying to get back into my field, it might be too far removed and I could end up with no job offers. Anyone go through something similar? IE most or all of a paycheck going to daycare? Money is not tight for us if we weren't doing preschool. We can't afford to pay for full time preschool unless I'm working, however. Also we would never do that because I would essentially be doing nothing if not working or watching our kids. I'm not getting the job for that reason...though after time, when pay increases, more money will obviously be welcome.
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Oct 18, 2013 20:13
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Bollock Monkey posted:Would it be entirely unreasonable to you to take your son with you if and when you have to have the dog put down? Because death is so abstract, I see a lot of value in being upfront about it. I was with one of my dogs when he was put down (though I was a bit older than your son), and seeing the process wasn't traumatic - I think if anything it helped me to understand what was going on, and the chance to say goodbye to a family member is really important, in my opinion. I was a weird kid, I'll give you that, but if I had been taken in to watch an animal be put down, you would have had a hell of a time ever getting me to have another vaccination ever. I was too quick to associate X with Y even when there was no real connection - it is not unlikely that a kid will see needle -> dog's dead now -> holy poo poo I have to have a needle now -> I will die too. But maybe your child is less paranoid than I was.
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Oct 19, 2013 11:38
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johnny sack I don't have any words of wisdom for you, I just wanted give you some internet sympathy. I have struggled with this. So many struggle with this. I went to a regular PT schedule after Tim was born, and then went per diem after Liam was born. The math of money in vs money out spent on care pretty much made the decision for me. Working FT and putting them both in care would have only netted us a scant few hundred a month. That's not even figuring gas, summer programs costing more, and general stress and scheduling wear and tear on our family. So here I am. I work in science, and going PT was kind of bad career wise, but not as bad as going per diem. I have side-lined my career and continuing education pretty severely, and I don't know how it will end up playing out. I am grateful that my job allowed me to go both PT and now lets me hang on per diem, but it is not without a price. I have missed learning entire waves of new technology and techniques. It...wears on me sometimes. Mr. Cookie's career has taken off for him (hard work and doing your job well pays off kids!), and sometimes being in that shadow makes that part of me atrophy even more. Our fields are vastly different, but we are equivalently well educated people. He uses his, and I--well, I know every song the Bubble Guppies sing. But, children are little for such a short time, and I have seen darned near every moment of it--the good, the bad, and the ugly. I don't know what is best for you to do, I really could not possibly presume to say. But whatever you choose, there is no "right" or "wrong". It's all grey, all the time. As for death chat--There is a clip out in the Interwebs in B&W with Mr. Rogers talking about the Kennedy assassination. It has Betty Aberlin blowing up a balloon, and then letting the air out for Daniel Tiger. People are like the balloon. When the balloon loses it's air, it's empty. But the balloon's air doesn't disappear--it goes into the room and just joins all the rest of the air. We can't see the balloon's air anymore, because it's empty, but that doesn't mean it's gone. Nothing is ever gone (we just change state.) That's how it is when people die. Our bodies are like empty balloons, but we don't disappear, we join all the rest of everything. It's the same sentiment as Sagan's stardust, but maybe a bit more approachable of an analogy for little kids. Good ol' Mr. Rogers; what a treasure he was.
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Oct 19, 2013 16:24
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AlistairCookie posted:johnny sack Yea if I had the option of PT I would be all over it. I feel the same way and am grateful for being there for their childhood for as much as I have. At the end of the day, it isn't toooooo much longer before our 3.5 year old will be in kindergarten, and I've got the chance to start a good career path...hopefully. And agreed, definitely we've struggled big time making the decision for me to work again, while netting almost nothing, for a time. We fall back on that if it doesn't work out, I'll quit and we won't be any worse off than now.
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Oct 19, 2013 16:42
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Anyone have any experience with lactation inducing drugs like Domperidone (Motilium, Motilidone)? My wife is not producing enough milk for our newborn and since she's so tiny (5lbs 11oz at birth) the nurses are now supplementing her with 1 oz of formula after each nursing. The docs are hoping the Motilium will kickstart the milk production and make the supplementing unnecessary.
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Oct 22, 2013 12:45
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AlistairCookie posted:As for death chat--There is a clip out in the Interwebs in B&W with Mr. Rogers talking about the Kennedy assassination. It has Betty Aberlin blowing up a balloon, and then letting the air out for Daniel Tiger. People are like the balloon. When the balloon loses it's air, it's empty. But the balloon's air doesn't disappear--it goes into the room and just joins all the rest of the air. We can't see the balloon's air anymore, because it's empty, but that doesn't mean it's gone. Nothing is ever gone (we just change state.) That's how it is when people die. Our bodies are like empty balloons, but we don't disappear, we join all the rest of everything. It's the same sentiment as Sagan's stardust, but maybe a bit more approachable of an analogy for little kids. Good ol' Mr. Rogers; what a treasure he was. drat, Mr. Rogers was awesome. Is there anybody on TV now who even approximates the kind of work Mr. Rogers did? I get sad sometimes that there doesn't seem to be anyone like that for Arthur to grow up with. We've been DVRing Mr. Rogers reruns and also Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood, which isn't nearly as good. (Yes, we do limit his TV time.)
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Oct 22, 2013 14:50
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Canuckistan posted:Anyone have any experience with lactation inducing drugs like Domperidone (Motilium, Motilidone)? My wife is not producing enough milk for our newborn and since she's so tiny (5lbs 11oz at birth) the nurses are now supplementing her with 1 oz of formula after each nursing. The docs are hoping the Motilium will kickstart the milk production and make the supplementing unnecessary. How do they know she isn't producing enough? I'm not trying to be snarky, but the first several weeks it is so important to have baby on the breast a lot to stimulate supply and adding formula supplementation is taking away time from the breast for the baby. Is she pumping while the baby eats that extra ounce? Newborn babies tummies are so small she doesn't take a lot in at one feeding. Edit: are you still in the hospital as in a brand brand new baby. My milk didn't come in until three days after the baby was born so had I not been knowledgable about how much a brand new baby eats at a time ( a couple of teaspoons in the first week) I would have been freaking out too. Does your hospital have a certified lactation consultant she can talk to? sheri fucked around with this message at 15:20 on Oct 22, 2013 |
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Oct 22, 2013 15:18
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I'll second what Sheri said. Newborn baby stomachs are sooooo small. They need to eat frequently which may seem like they're not getting enough. Here's a visual on stomach size: http://www.llli.org/faq/colostrum.html And here's a good write-up of what is normal and expected: http://kellymom.com/bf/normal/newborn-nursing/ At a minimum, the baby should nurse 10-12 times a day. Again, their stomachs are very small and breastmilk is quickly digested. Edit: If your wife received IV fluids prior to birth, the baby may seem like she's lost a lot of weight, when in reality she is shedding the extra fluid from the IV. Weighing at 24 hours gives a more accurate picture of the baby's weight. http://www.nancymohrbacher.com/blog/2011/10/31/newborn-weight-loss-and-iv-fluids-in-labor.html Chickalicious fucked around with this message at 15:26 on Oct 22, 2013 |
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Oct 22, 2013 15:22
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And keep in mind a lot of doctors and nurses have no clue about breastfeeding unfortunately. Try to get help from a lactation consultant or LLL member. My baby lost 11 oz (he was big so this was not 10% of body weight) and after a few days of losing he started packing on the pounds. Losing weight is normal, especially for breastfeed babies and if your wife had IV fluids. If she's lost more than 10 % of her birth weight though, supplementing may be the way to go but if your wife can pump to supplement that helps her supply.
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Oct 22, 2013 15:33
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Chicken McNobody posted:drat, Mr. Rogers was awesome. Is there anybody on TV now who even approximates the kind of work Mr. Rogers did? I get sad sometimes that there doesn't seem to be anyone like that for Arthur to grow up with. We've been DVRing Mr. Rogers reruns and also Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood, which isn't nearly as good. (Yes, we do limit his TV time.) There's a cartoon on PBS now called Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood. It's not as great as the real show but it carries over a lot of the superficial elements and some of the style/nature.
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Oct 22, 2013 16:26
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If you have Amazon prime you can stream every season of Mr. Rogers. That is worth way more than the $80/year price of prime. I kinda can't wait until my kid is old enough to watch it.
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Oct 22, 2013 17:07
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sheri posted:And keep in mind a lot of doctors and nurses have no clue about breastfeeding unfortunately. Try to get help from a lactation consultant or LLL member. My baby lost 11 oz (he was big so this was not 10% of body weight) and after a few days of losing he started packing on the pounds. Losing weight is normal, especially for breastfeed babies and if your wife had IV fluids. She's down 7 Oz in her first 24 hours so that's 8 percent. Since she's so small and was born 18 days early that makes it a concern. My wife is nursing a lot but she didn't produce enough milk for our first child so with that history in mind they're concerned about keeping her weight up. The routine now is to nurse, then supplement with pumped milk, then finish with formula. We intend to keep nursing if possible so that's where the lactation inducing meds come in. Another concern is that her suck may not be fully developed due to her small size and early arrival.
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Oct 22, 2013 18:31
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Everything that sheri and Chickalicious posted is right on. If baby is 24 hours old, her stomach can hold about 5-7 ml of milk, so supplementing with even an ounce is way more than her little stomach can even hold. If your wife intends to nurse I would be very wary about supplementing with formula at this time because it can do more harm than good, keeping baby away from the breast when frequent sucking is what sets up your supply. The best way to ensure that your wife has a good milk supply is to nurse as much as possible especially during the early days/weeks. All the stimulation of baby sucking will signal the breasts to produce more and more milk. And baby suckling at the breast is even more efficient at stimulating than a pump. I don't want to come across as a militant breastfeeder but, since your wife intends to nurse I wanted to offer encouragement more than anything. Especially with your baby being so young it can be hard to really see the whole picture - in my mind, she is either full-term or close to it (I couldn't tell if "18 days early" meant before due date, or before term) and if it were me, low birth weight wouldn't be a compelling enough reason to supplement so early. There is a wide variation in normal weight loss after birth and weight gain in breastfed babies. My advice would be to just nurse as much as possible - at least every 2-3 hours - wait for mom's milk to come in (remembering that this can take 3-5 days) and see what weight gain pattern is established before messing around with formula supplementation, drugs, etc. Doctors can be so quick to say that breastfeeding "isn't working" but the reality is that almost everyone can successfully breastfeed. And definitely seek out a lactation consultant if you have any other questions or concerns. edit: Forgot to add, check dirty/wet diapers. For the first week of life you should have 1 dirty and 1 wet diaper per day (at least). This is an indicator that baby is getting enough to eat. New Weave Wendy fucked around with this message at 19:30 on Oct 22, 2013 |
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Oct 22, 2013 18:52
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New Weave Wendy posted:Everything that sheri and Chickalicious posted is right on. If baby is 24 hours old, her stomach can hold about 5-7 ml of milk, so supplementing with even an ounce is way more than her little stomach can even hold. If your wife intends to nurse I would be very wary about supplementing with formula at this time because it can do more harm than good, keeping baby away from the breast when frequent sucking is what sets up your supply. The best way to ensure that your wife has a good milk supply is to nurse as much as possible especially during the early days/weeks. All the stimulation of baby sucking will signal the breasts to produce more and more milk. And baby suckling at the breast is even more efficient at stimulating than a pump. Amen. Exactly what I wanted to say except didn't want to type it all on my phone.
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Oct 22, 2013 19:09
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I just want to add that, with proper breastfeeding on demand, there are very very very few women who cannot make enough milk for their baby (in my lactation coursework, we were taught that number is between 1% and 5%). If her breasts changed at all during pregnancy, that number drops even lower. On the other hand, any supplementation with formula starts raising the likelihood of an impacted milk supply.
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Oct 22, 2013 21:50
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My wife tried breastfeeding with the last baby for three months with many many consults with LLL and public health. This was a bad three months with marathon feeding sessions, pumping when she could with very little milk being produced, many sleepless nights, and concerned parents. After three months our pediatrician gave a diagnosis of failure to thrive and we switched to formula. Night and day difference with the child after that. He started sleeping more and growth took off and went from FTT to 95 percentiles. Don't be quick to assume that everyone that has trouble nursing is either not committed or doing it wrong. Based on her history she's starting Motilium tonight to try and stimulate milk production. We want our new baby to nurse more than anything, but we also are keenly aware of the past and the toll that it had on our family. edit - I also made a mistake earlier. The forumla supplementation happening now is around 10 ml per feeding. This is after nursing for 45 minutes and then taking the 5-7 ml of colostrum that my wife is pumping between feeding. Canuckistan fucked around with this message at 00:24 on Oct 23, 2013 |
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Oct 23, 2013 00:18
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Canuckistan posted:My wife tried breastfeeding with the last baby for three months with many many consults with LLL and public health. This was a bad three months with marathon feeding sessions, pumping when she could with very little milk being produced, many sleepless nights, and concerned parents. After three months our pediatrician gave a diagnosis of failure to thrive and we switched to formula. Night and day difference with the child after that. He started sleeping more and growth took off and went from FTT to 95 percentiles. Her stomach capacity is 5-7 ml in the first few days of life. If she is nursing for 45 minutes and then taking 5-7 ml of colostrum that is by far enough. I don't know how your medical team can say that your wife needs help with milk production when her milk hasn't even come in yet. The best way to get supply up is have baby at the breast as often as possible. Each pregnancy is different so your wife may be just fine this time.
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Oct 23, 2013 00:49
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http://www.ameda.com.au/breastfeeding/breastfeeding-benefits/your-newborns-stomach-day-110.html http://www.beststart.org/resources/breastfeeding/pdf/breastfdeskref09.pdf
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Oct 23, 2013 01:18
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Just got back from E's 1 year doctor's appointment. The doctor wants us to add in more foods. We've done lots of vegetables, fruits and chicken. Doctor said add in some fish. Any links for us to read up on adding more foods for a 12 month old? Currently we are only dealing with an egg allergy. The dairy allergy seems to be gone thankfully. My wife specifically is wondering about adding wheat to the diet. We've been planning on nursing another 6 months. E is showing less interest in bottles of pumped breast milk. Sometimes not even finishing 2 ounces. Should my wife continue pumping at work everyday? She comes home at lunch to nurse. When do I start trying to get him back to sleep without wanting to nurse in the middle of the night? Currently if I can rock him and he goes back to sleep in 5 minutes then I'll put him back down in his crib. If he fusses and doesn't want to go back to sleep he get's brought into our room to nurse for a bit before going back to his room.
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Oct 24, 2013 20:17
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Hdip posted:Just got back from E's 1 year doctor's appointment. The doctor wants us to add in more foods. We've done lots of vegetables, fruits and chicken. Doctor said add in some fish. Any links for us to read up on adding more foods for a 12 month old? Currently we are only dealing with an egg allergy. The dairy allergy seems to be gone thankfully. My wife specifically is wondering about adding wheat to the diet. Have you tried introducing a cup? Whether or not your wife wants to pump at work is up to you guys. She can still nurse when she's around him and he can drink cows milk or some other kid of milk/ toddler formula/ etc when she's not around.
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Oct 24, 2013 20:29
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At a year, our kid was eating anything we did, outside of things like nuts or popcorn (choking hazards). Most women I know who pump because of work schedules usually wean off the pump around a year, continuing to nurse at home if they want. http://www.lalecheleague.org/nb/nbsepoct03p183.html http://www.hygeiainc.com/im-not-ready-to-wean-my-baby-but-im-ready-to-ditch-the-pump/ http://kellymom.com/bf/pumpingmoms/pumping/weaning-from-pump/ I didn't night wean until around 2. If you plan to continue nursing, but won't be pumping anymore during the day, you might want to consider whether skipping the night feedings will impact your supply. Baby at the breast = making milk, so anytime you reduce that, you're sending the signal to your body that you don't need to make that milk anymore.
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Oct 24, 2013 20:40
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Obviously ymmv but we had both our girls eating wheat products by 10 months- of course this is with no history of food allergies in the family. By a year my girls were gumming breadsticks/crusts, getting their own portions of baby pastina whenever I made pasta for the family, and generally eating little bites of whatever we were eating along with their baby portions. Growing up Italian it was pretty much a given that grandparents/great aunts were going to give my kids pasta and bread so we got it out of the way early. e: oh yeah and first birthday cupcakes are always hilarious, even if not much actually gets in the mouth.
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Oct 24, 2013 21:23
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My 14 month old is two teeth short of a full set and has been eating whatever we eat since about 9 months. I can give her a whole apple and she'll spend an hour eating small bites of it before getting bored. Soft foods and spoons make her rage, so we mostly just make her small plates of meats, veggies, fruits and tiny toast squares and let her pick at them until they're mostly empty. She gets three solid meals a day (usually a chopped up egg and a piece of toast for breakfast, fruit, meat and cheese for lunch, meat, potato and steamed veggies for dinner). On top of that she has three bottles of whole milk a day--first thing in the morning, nap time and before bed, though we are trying to cut down to two. If you're concerned about allergies, I'd just take it slow like you do when they first start getting solids--one new food a week, keep an eye out for reactions. Every kid is different, and may not even want a ton of solids at this point in time. I lucked out with an extremely food motivated hulk baby, but friends with kids around the same age are still on purees and toddler formula, and their pediatricians are cool with it. Also, my kid totally ate an entire piece of cake at her first birthday party and was super careful to make as little mess as possible because food on your face is food that isn't in your mouth I guess, haha.
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Oct 25, 2013 00:02
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I think a lot of times it really just depends on the kid. My first always ate very small amounts, and is still that way as a preschooler. She is very selective in what she eats. She didn't start eating enough food to make a difference in her diapers until over a year old. My second has been wolfing down everything he can get his hands on since I first gave him solids. He is two years younger and consistently out-eats his sister, and often finishes her plate of food at meals. And yet, they're almost completely comparable in size for age-- I look back at my daughter's stats to compare to my son's at each of his well baby visits.
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Oct 25, 2013 00:22
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Our kid was beginning to eat at 4 months (her choice, not ours), eating whatever we ate at 12 months (helps that she got her front teeth). Just introduce a new food every 3rd day until you've done all the foods you can think of, that is what we did. That way you can pick up on any allergies as well.
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Oct 25, 2013 12:48
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I'm looking for an opinion on moving to a new house from the experienced parents here. My wife is 18 weeks into a twin pregnancy. Our current house will fit twins, but it will be a bit of a squeeze. We do have some nice things like a fenced-in backyard, a half-finished basement, and a tiny mortgage payment (which will help us afford daycare for two). However, the school district isn't the best, so we would like to move to a different house sometime before the twins reach kindergarten. We don't want to move now though because the stress plus my wife's fatigue would be bad for everyone, including the unborn. Our question is, based on this thread's experience with kids, how soon do you think we should even consider moving? When the twins are 6 months? 1 year? 2 years? When does it become doable with babies/toddlers? Depending on the answer, we may decide to do some more upgrades to this house (such as replacing the 18 year old air conditioner).
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Oct 27, 2013 22:26
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Pendragon posted:I'm looking for an opinion on moving to a new house from the experienced parents here. If you want to minimize the stress on the kids, I'd say between 6 months and a year they get more comfort from their immediate surroundings so they probably won't notice if the room changes beyond the boundaries of the crib/bassinet/bed. Whether or not your wife is up to it is another issue.
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Oct 27, 2013 23:07
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Pendragon posted:I'm looking for an opinion on moving to a new house from the experienced parents here. Kids are super resilient, so I wouldn't worry about moving at any point between now and kindergarten. We moved when one of my kids was 2 1/2 and the other was 6 months and then we moved again when they were 3 1/2 and 1 1/2. A lot of people move around a lot and it isn't an issue. That said, if you don't have a lot of help moving, waiting until the kids are closer to kindergarten is probably easier than attempting it with toddlers.  They can be a handful.
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Oct 28, 2013 17:44
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/\/\ Truth. I would either move when they are very small, like infants, or wait until they are less crazy, like kindergarten. When you are a new parent, doing things with an infant seems daunting, but in reality, they are super easy at that stage. Just little balls of sleeping, cuddly sweetness. With Liam, we were out an about when he was 8 days old hanging out in the mei tai--park, Zoo, etc. In retrospect, we could have really had Tim tag along with us doing just about whatever when he was brand new, but we didn't. New parents and all. But they are really never more portable or easy (from the perspective of their portability, sleeping, and not caring about their surroundings) than when they are brand new. You can just sit them in bouncers and pack, and they are totally fine. Mine are 2.5 and 5.5 now, and the thought of moving with them gives me the shivers. We would have to put Liam with family or friends or something to get it done now.
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Oct 29, 2013 00:56
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AlistairCookie posted:/\/\ Things are much easier for me with a toddler than a newborn. Even though herding my child is harder, I get plenty of sleep so I can actually brain during the day.
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Oct 29, 2013 04:02
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We moved when my son was two months old and it was horrible. My husband and I could only work one at a time to get things packed and unpacked (which made it seem to take four times as long) and my son didn't nap the entire day when we were actually moving because of the hustle and bustle. I think it would be a lot easier to do now (he's 21 months old), although it would still be one of us at a time unless we got a babysitter.
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Oct 29, 2013 04:29
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We moved when my daughter was 18 months old and it was awesome. She'd been cosleeping so we told her our new apartment had a new big-girl room and transitioned her into a toddler bed.
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Oct 31, 2013 02:38
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We last moved when #1 son was a few weeks shy of two years old and it went pretty easy -- sure, we needed someone to watch him but we had a few people to help with everything anyway. The kid accepted the move quite seamlessly.
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Oct 31, 2013 06:02
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My kid is two and a half. Tonight she decided she didn't want to trick or treat, but changed her mind after dinner though she didn't want her costume, then she needed juice first.... long story short, it was bedtime (an hour after we finished dinner and started this) before we got her shoes on. She lost her mind when she realized she couldn't "go halloween". I was really torn between letting her go, after bedtime, for just two or three houses, but we are working on her listening when we ask her to do things and not saying "no" to things she wants. My husband sided with strictness. We did not go halloween tonight. I'm looking for someone to tell me that I'm not a bad mother for denying my kid trick-or-treating, and that she won't remember this as some kind of tragic injustice, and she'll still like me in the morning. Where's the line between teaching your kid about consequences and just being mean?
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Nov 1, 2013 04:57
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Melliemel posted:I'm looking for someone to tell me that I'm not a bad mother for denying my kid trick-or-treating, and that she won't remember this as some kind of tragic injustice, and she'll still like me in the morning. Where's the line between teaching your kid about consequences and just being mean? Based on your description of events, your denying her trick or treating seems very reasonable. It may be worthwhile to sit down with her tomorrow or the day after and calmly explain why you made the decision you did. I, personally, don't remember trick-or-treating under 5 or 6 or so. So I think your kid won't grow up totally screwed up or anything.
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Nov 1, 2013 05:38
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Melliemel posted:My kid is two and a half. Tonight she decided she didn't want to trick or treat, but changed her mind after dinner though she didn't want her costume, then she needed juice first.... long story short, it was bedtime (an hour after we finished dinner and started this) before we got her shoes on. She lost her mind when she realized she couldn't "go halloween". I was really torn between letting her go, after bedtime, for just two or three houses, but we are working on her listening when we ask her to do things and not saying "no" to things she wants. My husband sided with strictness. We did not go halloween tonight. edit: I was older than two, though
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Nov 1, 2013 13:39
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| # ? May 14, 2024 22:05 |
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Here's what happens when you make a reluctant and cranky kid trick-or-treat: He was tired, he wasn't thrilled with the crowds and with talking to strangers, he hates wearing hats, and it was generally kind of a miserable experience. I wanted so badly to get a good picture of him smiling and looking cute. Did.not.happen. Next year we will be taking it much more slowly and hopefully we can all be much happier, and certainly if he kicks up any kind of fuss he can stay at home. (also, someone please post your cute and happy child enjoying Halloween!)
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Nov 1, 2013 15:14
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