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shovelbum
Oct 21, 2010

Fun Shoe

Two Finger posted:

:stare:
Multiple loving choice?
Goddamn. That's just not fair.

I had a 90 minute oral examination with two lecturers. Not fun.

The question bank is available for us to study beforehand too! (there are tens of thousands of questions, many lacking a factually correct answer choice, we spend a full semester mostly just memorizing them of course to keep the academy's passing rate looking good)

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FrozenVent
May 1, 2009

The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.
Holy gently caress, and I thought our system was bad :stare:

Fish Shalami
Feb 6, 2005

What is shalami?
Anyone know where I can take an STCW refresher course in the SF area? I need to renew my 2nds, but need to retake STCW nonsense and Vessel Security Officer (VSO) first.

My buddy just shipped back out with Exmar (Belgian LNG ships) after he stopped sailing for about two years. It's taken him one month at sea to A) hate life, B) have his girlfriend dump him, and C) think about quitting at next port. I must say its kind of funny to watch all this unfold from shore for once.

lightpole
Jun 4, 2004
I think that MBAs are useful, in case you are looking for an answer to the question of "Is lightpole a total fucking idiot".
CMA has everything. There's a combined security course Dec 10-12 for $900 and the union is also doing one sometime after Jan 1st I think but you would have to check with Kathy since I had already signed up for CMA's when she called. Union will cover the security course and CMA gives a 10% discount to alumni. I think the basic safety is like $500-$1000. The fire fighting portion is at Treasure Island at the old Navy sim and the rest is at CMA in Vallejo.

Never leave shore.

On the Green Cove they had an OS jump off the main deck (car carrier). When he hit the water he broke a lot of stuff and it was pretty nasty recovering him.

DO NOT LEAVE LAND.

lightpole fucked around with this message at 16:09 on Nov 16, 2013

potentiometer
Dec 31, 2006

Tide posted:

:drat:

Beats my story about the captain that jumped from the bridge wing in the Florida straits, the c/o that od'd on heroin, or captain that got tossed overboard by his crew

Yay! Shipboard suicide attempts, been waiting for this one to come up lol. One vessel (a Knot Ship for any of you greybeards out there, the Reef Knot) I sailed on as an AB we had a cooks assistant try to kill himself by trying to slash his throat with a pull tab off of a beer can. The loving kid was a real troublemaker and the ABs used to ride him relentlessly, guess he figured there was an easier way out. Really all he needed to do was ask, as there's any number of ways to snuff yourself on a boat where there's no second chances ;-)

Fish Shalami
Feb 6, 2005

What is shalami?

lightpole posted:

CMA has everything. There's a combined security course Dec 10-12 for $900 and the union is also doing one sometime after Jan 1st I think but you would have to check with Kathy since I had already signed up for CMA's when she called. Union will cover the security course and CMA gives a 10% discount to alumni. I think the basic safety is like $500-$1000. The fire fighting portion is at Treasure Island at the old Navy sim and the rest is at CMA in Vallejo.

Never leave shore.

On the Green Cove they had an OS jump off the main deck (car carrier). When he hit the water he broke a lot of stuff and it was pretty nasty recovering him.

DO NOT LEAVE LAND.

Yea Kathy called me the other day about the VSO course. Maybe I can convince my company to pay for the refresher course, I don't feel like dropping a grand to take a class to tell me not to spray water on an electrical fire.

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers





potentiometer posted:

Yay! Shipboard suicide attempts, been waiting for this one to come up lol. One vessel (a Knot Ship for any of you greybeards out there, the Reef Knot) I sailed on as an AB we had a cooks assistant try to kill himself by trying to slash his throat with a pull tab off of a beer can. The loving kid was a real troublemaker and the ABs used to ride him relentlessly, guess he figured there was an easier way out. Really all he needed to do was ask, as there's any number of ways to snuff yourself on a boat where there's no second chances ;-)

I read an accident report bout a guy on a cruise ship who stabbed himself ninety seven times with a skewer. Think about that for a second.

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers





lightpole posted:

Answers you need to know are true, c and all of the above.

For the 2nd and 3rds the USCG has a PDF on their website of every single question for each of the 7 sections on the exam, the tests will have a portion of those questions on them. The questions are all multiple choice and there are some drawings and diagrams but mainly it's just memorizing everything.

Any chance you could link me to this? I tried searching but every time I try to go to the coast guard website it throws a 403.

shovelbum
Oct 21, 2010

Fun Shoe

Two Finger posted:

Any chance you could link me to this? I tried searching but every time I try to go to the coast guard website it throws a 403.

http://www.uscg.mil/nmc/training/exams/default.asp

I hear in the older tests they used a shitload more of the

Which of the following statements are true:
I: The sky is blue
II: You'll never see it again from the engine room

a: I
b: I
c: I and II
d: Neither I nor II

format, which sounds even more delightful!

shovelbum fucked around with this message at 20:38 on Nov 17, 2013

FrozenVent
May 1, 2009

The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.
M'y favorite multiple choice was

According to the COLREGS, which of the following activities should be avoided while in coastal navigation:

A) manual plotting of multiple targets
B) reviewing tidal tables to check UKC at all point of the voyage
C) reading the company's ISM manual
D) Some other bullshit I forgot

The correct answer is, obviously, A, because the COLREGS don't specifically mention any of her other options.

I don't remember the actual wording of the answer choices and I can't be assed to pull out the regs, but it was some insanity along those lines.

lightpole
Jun 4, 2004
I think that MBAs are useful, in case you are looking for an answer to the question of "Is lightpole a total fucking idiot".

shovelbum posted:

http://www.uscg.mil/nmc/training/exams/default.asp

I hear in the older tests they used a shitload more of the

Which of the following statements are true:
I: The sky is blue
II: You'll never see it again from the engine room

a: I
b: I
c: I and II
d: Neither I nor II

format, which sounds even more delightful!

Not true/false, no all of the above, therefore C.

The Bowditch or whatever books have the most frequently used questions otherwise its looking through a lot of irrelevant questions if you use the USCG stuff.

shovelbum
Oct 21, 2010

Fun Shoe

lightpole posted:

The Bowditch or whatever books have the most frequently used questions otherwise its looking through a lot of irrelevant questions if you use the USCG stuff.

We just use Seasources, the book set is 200 bucks and no one seems to really benefit from it on the engine side. They say the best thing is to know where stuff is in the CFR so that you can look up the firefighting equipment stuff etc.

lightpole
Jun 4, 2004
I think that MBAs are useful, in case you are looking for an answer to the question of "Is lightpole a total fucking idiot".
I didn't bother with the CFRs. I could use them but not very efficiently. I just memorized and then used common sense on most of them.

FrozenVent
May 1, 2009

The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

lightpole posted:

I just memorized and then used common sense on most of them.

Common sense's hazardous when it comes to reg. My favorite Canadian example is that poo poo concerning lifting appliances and tackle isn't in the Tackle Regulations, it's in the Cargo, Fumigation and Tackle Regulation. The Tackle Regs have poo poo about gangways and that's pretty much it.

Why do we have two regulations with tackle in the title? Welcome to Canada.

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers





lightpole posted:

Not true/false, no all of the above, therefore C.

The Bowditch or whatever books have the most frequently used questions otherwise its looking through a lot of irrelevant questions if you use the USCG stuff.

Aha, I have a 1943 copy of Bowditch, let me just dig it out

FrozenVent
May 1, 2009

The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

Two Finger posted:

Aha, I have a 1943 copy of Bowditch, let me just dig it out

Except for the electronic navigation sections, you'll find your copy of Bowditch remarkably similar to the current one.

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers





Do I need to pull out my 'A Glossary of Sea Terms' again?

FrozenVent
May 1, 2009

The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

Two Finger posted:

Do I need to pull out my 'A Glossary of Sea Terms' again?

:allears: Please do.

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers





My next two contracts are on that awful broken thing I showed FV. Why is it that a guy who is so incompetent that he contaminates the entire distilled water system via opening the emergency technical water filling valve and not telling anyone for two days gets upgraded to the newest ship in the fleet and because I do my job with any kind of competency I get to stay on the worst ship? :(

FrozenVent
May 1, 2009

The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

Two Finger posted:

My next two contracts are on that awful broken thing I showed FV. Why is it that a guy who is so incompetent that he contaminates the entire distilled water system via opening the emergency technical water filling valve and not telling anyone for two days gets upgraded to the newest ship in the fleet and because I do my job with any kind of competency I get to stay on the worst ship? :(

The other guy's loving up the new boat so you don't feel too out of place when you get transferred.

The competent hard working people always get hosed, it's the way of the world. Wish I could show you some of the shitshows I've sailed on.

Tide
Mar 27, 2010

by FactsAreUseless

Two Finger posted:

My next two contracts are on that awful broken thing I showed FV. Why is it that a guy who is so incompetent that he contaminates the entire distilled water system via opening the emergency technical water filling valve and not telling anyone for two days gets upgraded to the newest ship in the fleet and because I do my job with any kind of competency I get to stay on the worst ship? :(

Because you've shown the ability/aptitude to handle a bad situation and you won't gently caress it up. It's not a punishment, though it feels like it. I get the same thing (project vessels, dry docks, difficult customers, etc).

At least that's what I tell myself :smith:

lightpole
Jun 4, 2004
I think that MBAs are useful, in case you are looking for an answer to the question of "Is lightpole a total fucking idiot".
All I know is if pressure wash the potable tanks in the Persian gulf you can feel free to ask anyone and everyone including the captain how your nuts taste.

FrozenVent
May 1, 2009

The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

Tide posted:

Because you've shown the ability/aptitude to handle a bad situation and you won't gently caress it up. It's not a punishment, though it feels like it. I get the same thing (project vessels, dry docks, difficult customers, etc).

At least that's what I tell myself :smith:

I got a reputation as the relief who could stomach the terrible captains.

So of course I got all the terrible captains in the fleet.

Tide
Mar 27, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
Speaking of captains...You are...Canadian, if I remember right? Anyway, somewhat of an anecdote, but every American captain I've ever worked with has been a grade A rear end in a top hat. Good at their jobs, I guess, but rear end in a top hat none the less. I probably get along best and prefer to work with the older Norwegian masters - which unfortunately is getting pretty rare these days. Filipinos are probably the most easy going, Indians make me want to pull my hair out, and Greeks are just annoying. Captains, I mean.

Russians/Latvians/Ukrainians are usually too hungover to form a sentence.

FrozenVent
May 1, 2009

The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.
I've sailed with two Norwegian captains, one was a hard rear end ex-navy guy (but fair) and the other was basically the boss from The Devil Wears Prada.

Canadians run the gamut, in my experience.

Tide
Mar 27, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
Sadly, I've only met a few Canadians on board the ships I've covered. One was a 20 year old cadet that looked suspiciously like Shaun White. On a Vanuatu flagged self discharger with an otherwise all Indian and Pakistani crew. Took him out for a huge Southern breakfast. I don't know if I've ever seen someone so happy to see a plate of eggs and grits.

nwin
Feb 25, 2002

make's u think

Tide posted:

Sadly, I've only met a few Canadians on board the ships I've covered. One was a 20 year old cadet that looked suspiciously like Shaun White. On a Vanuatu flagged self discharger with an otherwise all Indian and Pakistani crew. Took him out for a huge Southern breakfast. I don't know if I've ever seen someone so happy to see a plate of eggs and grits.

There was one foreign ship I did a PSC exam on that had a phillipino cook but the rest of the crew was Eastern European. Good god they hated the cook.

FrozenVent
May 1, 2009

The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

Tide posted:

Sadly, I've only met a few Canadians on board the ships I've covered. One was a 20 year old cadet that looked suspiciously like Shaun White. On a Vanuatu flagged self discharger with an otherwise all Indian and Pakistani crew. Took him out for a huge Southern breakfast. I don't know if I've ever seen someone so happy to see a plate of eggs and grits.

Ah, I bet I know which company that was... There's a few Canadian companies that operate foreign flag boats that'll take cadets. Having done a similar tour, I can assure that breakfast was the best thing that kid had eaten in his life, holy poo poo.

It took like five years before I could eat curry again, good god.

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers





My good mate worked on a vessel doing NZ-islands and he said they had curried pancakes one morning, so I believe you.

lightpole
Jun 4, 2004
I think that MBAs are useful, in case you are looking for an answer to the question of "Is lightpole a total fucking idiot".
The security teams are always happy to be on American ships. Apparently the Chinese ones are pretty bad.

FrozenVent
May 1, 2009

The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

Two Finger posted:

My good mate worked on a vessel doing NZ-islands and he said they had curried pancakes one morning, so I believe you.

One morning? He got lucky. There was this... Soup thing? With a donut floating in it?

Seriously, I don't know the names for any Indian food; the menus were in Hindi and the steward didn't speak English, so I just hate "same thing" for five months solid. It was hot on the way in, hot on the way out, and good goddamn was the bi-monthly chicken burger night the best loving thing ever. Eventually we hit Texas and I bought two of the biggest tubs of peanut butter I'd ever seen, that lasted me for the last three months. Lost about 25 pounds.

Of course now I love Indian food, but as I said it was years before I could even smell curry.

lightpole posted:

The security teams are always happy to be on American ships. Apparently the Chinese ones are pretty bad.

I've also heard horror stories about Russian boats; the pilots called it "water soup".

Fish Shalami
Feb 6, 2005

What is shalami?
We ran out of food sitting at anchor off Trinidad once, the company didn't want to schedule stores since the ship could be leaving any day. It went on like this for a couple weeks. Some Filipinos decide to start fishing off the stern; bear in mind that this is crowded anchorage where ships sit for a while, so I wouldn't call it the cleanest water in the world. They kept everything they caught and served it to the crew. We had fishhead soup. I'm talking fish broth, with a fish head in it. No thanks you.

At least we didn't run out of beer.

FrozenVent
May 1, 2009

The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

Fish Shalami posted:

We ran out of food sitting at anchor off Trinidad once, the company didn't want to schedule stores since the ship could be leaving any day. It went on like this for a couple weeks. Some Filipinos decide to start fishing off the stern; bear in mind that this is crowded anchorage where ships sit for a while, so I wouldn't call it the cleanest water in the world. They kept everything they caught and served it to the crew. We had fishhead soup. I'm talking fish broth, with a fish head in it. No thanks you.

At least we didn't run out of beer.

Ugh, gently caress fish heads in all their culinary forms. That should be on the schools' website - you will, at some point, have to eat the wrong part of an animal or starve.

Never ran out of food, but I've seen a lot of fishing off the boat. Never ate any of it myself.

Skeleton Jelly
Jul 1, 2011

Kids in the street drinking wine, on the sidewalk.
Saving the plans that we made, 'till its night time.
Give me your glass, its your last, you're too wasted.
Or get me one too, 'cause I'm due any tasting.
Just wanted to let everyone know that this thread has been a massively interesting read. I'm myself at the moment in a trade school doing welding but I've been seriously considering seafaring as a career for a bit now and this thread hasn't managed to scare me away so far. I'm Finnish and maritime education here seems to be quite different from what it's like in the States and Canada so in that regards I don't believe I can get lots of advice here but actual aspects of the job are probably quite international.

nwin
Feb 25, 2002

make's u think

Fish Shalami posted:

We ran out of food sitting at anchor off Trinidad once, the company didn't want to schedule stores since the ship could be leaving any day. It went on like this for a couple weeks. Some Filipinos decide to start fishing off the stern; bear in mind that this is crowded anchorage where ships sit for a while, so I wouldn't call it the cleanest water in the world. They kept everything they caught and served it to the crew. We had fishhead soup. I'm talking fish broth, with a fish head in it. No thanks you.

At least we didn't run out of beer.

Always wondered about drinking on board. All I've ever gathered is that most ships (alright, mainly the Eastern European crews)carry some kind of beer and I think the general rule is no drinking within 8 hours of your watch or something, so if C/O, 2nd, and 3rd all stand bridge watch, they can basically have a beer when they get off watch. What am I missing?

lightpole
Jun 4, 2004
I think that MBAs are useful, in case you are looking for an answer to the question of "Is lightpole a total fucking idiot".
US BAC is .04 but companies can and will set their own no tolerance policies. You can and will be tested at every opportunity and generally having anything in your systems puts you at fault so...

Per
Feb 22, 2006
Hair Elf

Skeleton Jelly posted:

Just wanted to let everyone know that this thread has been a massively interesting read. I'm myself at the moment in a trade school doing welding but I've been seriously considering seafaring as a career for a bit now and this thread hasn't managed to scare me away so far. I'm Finnish and maritime education here seems to be quite different from what it's like in the States and Canada so in that regards I don't believe I can get lots of advice here but actual aspects of the job are probably quite international.

Are you of the Swedish speaking variety? Quite a few Swedes attended my school in Denmark, fwiw.

Fish Shalami
Feb 6, 2005

What is shalami?

nwin posted:

Always wondered about drinking on board. All I've ever gathered is that most ships (alright, mainly the Eastern European crews)carry some kind of beer and I think the general rule is no drinking within 8 hours of your watch or something, so if C/O, 2nd, and 3rd all stand bridge watch, they can basically have a beer when they get off watch. What am I missing?

Those were Belgian flagged vessels, so it was normal. We had a fully stocked bar out at sea, good poo poo too, Leffe, Stella, Hoegarden, Duvel, Johnny, etc. They closed it up 12 hours before cargo ops or port though. If you were on watch or duty you technically weren't supposed to drink, but every foreign ship I was on the Captain actually encouraged you to come to bar hour and be social, didn't mind you having one beer, just didn't want you to get poo poo faced. I'll admit, being able to have a beer after work each day if I wanted it was very nice, made me less inclined to binge when I got off the ship.

US Vessels it's a different story. Yes I've been on US ships where there has been beer, but I'm going to say 80% of the companies don't allow drinking, or make it a really really bad idea to have a drink while on board. Or maybe that's just because I've mostly been on tankers.

lightpole
Jun 4, 2004
I think that MBAs are useful, in case you are looking for an answer to the question of "Is lightpole a total fucking idiot".
Never ever sail tankers except Chevron.

Matson BBQs before Hawaii are tits. Had to drag my relief out of his bunk several times. Maersk is dry and the captains didn't like to leave the ship but chiefs and 1sts wanted beer and would let you know how to get it or get it for you. APL is wet as well with the same tolerance as Matson. However when I was a cadet on APL the 2nd got called out for arrival at 0dark30 and hit his toe on something when he got up and hurt it. When he went to get it looked at the captain just tested him and sent him back to work. If someone doesn't like you on such a ship they can have your room searched and you tested at the worst possible moment which is something to keep in mind.

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Fragrag
Aug 3, 2007
The Worst Admin Ever bashes You in the head with his banhammer. It is smashed into the body, an unrecognizable mass! You have been struck down.
So this happened on the Belgian coast

If you can't read Dutch, hundreds of syringes wash ashore on a Belgian beach. They think a ship simply threw the used syringes of a crewmember overboard. :barf: That or it's cargo that went overboard, but how likely is the first scenario?

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