hey, it's bob

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > hey, it's bob

«‹›42 »

FreakerByTheSpeaker: Dec 3, 2006; You got your good things
And I've got mine

Lure the guests out of their room one at a time with their siren call...

Hai big boi! oooOOOOooooOOOoOOoo

# ? Dec 11, 2013 16:31

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 11, 2024 01:39

Al Borland: Oct 29, 2006; by XyloJW

Atma posted:

There will be no Bob tonight.

If someone wants to be a cool kid goon they can tally up the votes so far for me to make it easier tomorrow. I'm a lazy OP.

TALLY OF TOP TWO:

Nothing is being counted after this post so go gently caress yourselves.
Winner:

Dauntasa posted:

switch back to bob, bar office door, set motel on fire

10 votes and some minor variations not counted

G.I. Jaw posted:

>Take key to Rooms 3, 5, and 7
>Call police on motel phone to report murder, claim you witnessed tenants in Room 1 commit the crime
>Take Susie to Room 7 and attempt to comfort her

7 votes

# ? Dec 11, 2013 21:16

Cactus Ghost: Dec 20, 2003; you can actually inflate your scrote pretty safely with sterile saline, syringes, needles, and aseptic technique. its a niche kink iirc

the saline just slowly gets absorbed into your blood but in the meantime you got a big round smooth distended nutsack

G.I. Jaw posted:

>Take key to Rooms 3, 5, and 7
>Call police on motel phone to report murder, claim you witnessed tenants in Room 1 commit the crime
>Take Susie to Room 7 and attempt to comfort her

# ? Dec 12, 2013 02:30

packsmack: Jan 6, 2013

G.I. Jaw posted:

>Take key to Rooms 3, 5, and 7
>Call police on motel phone to report murder, claim you witnessed tenants in Room 1 commit the crime
>Take Susie to Room 7 and attempt to comfort her

Adding another vote to this to make it 9

# ? Dec 12, 2013 02:31

walking: Nov 27, 2013

G.I. Jaw posted:

>Take key to Rooms 3, 5, and 7
>Call police on motel phone to report murder, claim you witnessed tenants in Room 1 commit the crime
>Take Susie to Room 7 and attempt to comfort her

# ? Dec 12, 2013 02:34

net cafe scandal: Mar 18, 2011

G.I. Jaw posted:

>Take key to Rooms 3, 5, and 7
>Call police on motel phone to report murder, claim you witnessed tenants in Room 1 commit the crime
>Take Susie to Room 7 and attempt to comfort her

# ? Dec 12, 2013 02:59

ArtIsResistance: May 19, 2007; QUEEN OF FRANCE, SAVIOR OF LOWTAX

Dauntasa posted:

switch back to bob, bar office door, set motel on fire

bob must return

# ? Dec 12, 2013 03:03

Surprisingly Dope: Jan 12, 2011; Lope burgs again

Dauntasa posted:

switch back to bob, bar office door, set motel on fire

# ? Dec 12, 2013 03:04

Ixtlilton: Mar 10, 2012; How to Draw
by Rube Goldberg

G.I. Jaw posted:

>Take key to Rooms 3, 5, and 7
>Call police on motel phone to report murder, claim you witnessed tenants in Room 1 commit the crime
>Take Susie to Room 7 and attempt to comfort her

# ? Dec 12, 2013 03:04

memy: Oct 15, 2011; by exmarx

Do this

G.I. Jaw posted:

>Take key to Rooms 3, 5, and 7
>Call police on motel phone to report murder, claim you witnessed tenants in Room 1 commit the crime
>Take Susie to Room 7 and attempt to comfort her

And then this

Dauntasa posted:

switch back to bob, bar office door, set motel on fire

# ? Dec 12, 2013 03:07

Poland Spring: Sep 11, 2005

>Switch to Bob's Wife

# ? Dec 12, 2013 03:12

InFlames235: Jan 13, 2004; LIKE THE WAVES IN THE OCEAN I WILL DIG IN YOUR FAT AND SEARCH FOR YOUR CLITORIS, BUT I WON'T SLAM WHALE

Is the bob thread over?

# ? Dec 12, 2013 03:33

Kid Gloves: Jul 31, 2013; by XyloJW

no atma is just taking a break 2nite

# ? Dec 12, 2013 03:52

InFlames235: Jan 13, 2004; LIKE THE WAVES IN THE OCEAN I WILL DIG IN YOUR FAT AND SEARCH FOR YOUR CLITORIS, BUT I WON'T SLAM WHALE

He took a break last night gawd drat it

# ? Dec 12, 2013 03:57

poverty goat: Feb 15, 2004

> Switch to Atma, smoke weed, post in bob thread

# ? Dec 12, 2013 04:03

Crotch Turtles: May 1, 2005; by Lowtax

gggiiimmmppp posted:

> Switch to Atma, smoke weed, post in bob thread

# ? Dec 12, 2013 04:09

Nnep: Jun 17, 2007; 3-2 2-0

call that motherfucker into work

# ? Dec 12, 2013 04:10

Acid Haze: Feb 16, 2009

Acid Haze posted:

>Cut off Moe's head. Take it with you to Room 1. Knock.
>Switch back to bob, starting from when Ballsac and bob's wife arrived with him at the motel.

# ? Dec 12, 2013 04:22

That DICK!: Sep 28, 2010

Dauntasa posted:

switch back to bob, bar office door, set motel on fire

anyone posting anything other than this is a child

# ? Dec 12, 2013 04:29

Zippy the Bummer: Dec 14, 2008; Silent Majority
The Don
LORD COMMANDER OF THE UKRAINIAN ARMED FORCES

Dauntasa posted:

switch back to bob, bar office door, set motel on fire

# ? Dec 12, 2013 04:48

Trundel: Mar 13, 2005; + =
- a sound investment!

That DICK! posted:

anyone posting anything other than this is a child

Or a pony apologist.Let's repeatedly set fire every shelter that Bryon runs to and then have him escape each deathtrap. He will become the greatest escape artist known to man.

# ? Dec 12, 2013 04:48

Snooze Cruise: Feb 16, 2013; hey look,
a post

He has a fireaxe with him this time and Susie is right outside the office, its not going to be that hard of an escape attempt.

# ? Dec 12, 2013 04:51

Zippy the Bummer: Dec 14, 2008; Silent Majority
The Don
LORD COMMANDER OF THE UKRAINIAN ARMED FORCES

scratch my last vote

>switch to bob, confront byron in office, say "more brony now than son, twisted and evil"

# ? Dec 12, 2013 04:54

Snooze Cruise: Feb 16, 2013; hey look,
a post

Globo-Corp posted:

scratch my last vote

>switch to bob, confront byron in office, say "more brony now than son, twisted and evil"

# ? Dec 12, 2013 04:54

Atma: Sep 16, 2002; College Slice

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WA5k4c36DgI

(ty Al Borland for counting the votes)

# ? Dec 12, 2013 04:59

Snooze Cruise: Feb 16, 2013; hey look,
a post

>flashback to what led to this

# ? Dec 12, 2013 05:01

That DICK!: Sep 28, 2010

> switch to susie, poo poo and piss into bucket below, thus activating weight-sensitive release mechanism. Leave bob with the human being GWAR guy and go set fire to the hotel your child is in. bar the loving door

# ? Dec 12, 2013 05:02

Zippy the Bummer: Dec 14, 2008; Silent Majority
The Don
LORD COMMANDER OF THE UKRAINIAN ARMED FORCES

>wait for Satan to emerge to see if you are actually satan or not

# ? Dec 12, 2013 05:02

net cafe scandal: Mar 18, 2011

>commune with roaches

# ? Dec 12, 2013 05:02

Snooze Cruise: Feb 16, 2013; hey look,
a post

>switch to Balsac, say "You want to play a game?" and explain the mechanics of the Saw style traps they are in.

# ? Dec 12, 2013 05:03

poverty goat: Feb 15, 2004

Pray to Lemmy for salvation

# ? Dec 12, 2013 05:04

Snooze Cruise: Feb 16, 2013; hey look,
a post

no wait, this is perfect

>switch back to Bryon, bar room 1 door, set motel on fire

# ? Dec 12, 2013 05:04

Quidam Viator: Jan 24, 2001; ask me about how voting Donald Trump was worth 400k and counting dead.

>tell wife, "I know this is crazy, but I'm gonna get us out of here." Squeeze out a big steamer into the sacred blood bucket, then kick your rear end around swinging and knock that dusty-rear end dresser over right into the demonic pentagram.

Time to gently caress poo poo up!

# ? Dec 12, 2013 05:05

Dely Apple: Apr 22, 2006; Sing me Spanish Techno

>vomit another horse out of your gullet

# ? Dec 12, 2013 05:06

almightyerin: Apr 16, 2007; The one the only. Accept no substitutes.

Scream to Balsac "I SHALL HELP YOU! TOGETHER WE WILL SACRIFICE THE WOMAN!" and start chanting with him. Get yourself swinging back and forth, spray poo poo on your wife everytime you swing close.

# ? Dec 12, 2013 05:06

Ixtlilton: Mar 10, 2012; How to Draw
by Rube Goldberg

Quidam Viator posted:

>tell wife, "I know this is crazy, but I'm gonna get us out of here." Squeeze out a big steamer into the sacred blood bucket, then kick your rear end around swinging and knock that dusty-rear end dresser over right into the demonic pentagram.

Time to gently caress poo poo up!

# ? Dec 12, 2013 05:11

Fidel Cuckstro: Jul 2, 2007

mr.capps posted:

>switch to Balsac, say "You want to play a game?" and explain the mechanics of the Saw style traps they are in.

>switch to Triple-H, break down door with sledgehammer, say "It's time to play the game" and let motorhead themesong kick in.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z2o2-T3H1KU

# ? Dec 12, 2013 05:14