Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens - Choose Your Own Adventure

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Traditional Games > The Game Room > Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens - Choose Your Own Adventure

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Zybourne Clock: Oct 25, 2011; Poke me.

Pladdicus posted:

D They WILL unhand him!
+
I Please El, protect our brother Danal, protect our father Tudiya, our mother, Jalitha, our love, Naomi. Please give me the strength to see it done. Summarized with a mighty "EL!"

This.

You're a big brother now, Enkidel. Go be a big brother.

Zybourne Clock fucked around with this message at 02:15 on Dec 22, 2013

# ? Dec 22, 2013 01:28

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# ? Jun 9, 2024 22:46

Wentley: Feb 7, 2012

HiHo ChiRho posted:

Where the El is this guy right now?

Let's save our Labaras. Go get Danal.

I wonder if that is Az.

As of now, Danal is safe. However, Paeble is not, and he stuck with us. Help him out, and then lead him back to get Danal.

So F then D.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 01:28

Pladdicus: Aug 13, 2010

Changed my D vote to make it non-lethal as per recent update.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 01:29

RandomPauI: Nov 24, 2006; Grimey Drawer

F. We'll need their help to save Danal.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 01:30

Althair: Jul 26, 2006; words are weapons

Pladdicus posted:

D They WILL unhand him! (This will non-lethal unless they turn murdery hostile then maybe please call a vote to switch?)
+
I Please El, protect our brother Danal, protect our father Tudiya, our mother, Jalitha, our love, Naomi. Please give me the strength to see it done. Summarized with a mighty "EL!"

# ? Dec 22, 2013 01:41

Deadly Ham Sandwich: Aug 19, 2009; Smellrose

I get the feeling what is about to happen is going to occur pretty drat quickly, so we may not have time to save Paeble and Danal. It will be pretty awkward to explain to Tudiya why we saved heretic Paeble instead of our brother.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 01:42

Grizzwold: Jan 27, 2012; Posters off the pork bow!

I thought Paeble was among the ones fighting against Bareen's men? Maybe it's just the way I read it. Diog, mind clearing this up?

If he's not with us, then ignore him, but otherwise:

Mr Apollo posted:

Friends then Danal then Everybody else. Try to rally and organize those scattered throughout the temple fighting for El.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 01:45

Speleothing: May 6, 2008; Spare batteries are pretty key.

J is the best option. Or the least stupid. We may be Mighty Men, but this is seriously a dumb fight to get involved in. Not sure who we should shoot, I'm leaning toward either:

a) Nobody, unless they try to attack us.
c) Everyone, who gives a poo poo. Put an arrow in Bareen's back, and one into Tudiya's chest. Survivor is clearly the more favored.

The other option I like is C, escaping into the courtyard. Though I'd prefer to stay in the Temple and watch the fight. Besides, we want to be around when Bareen wins and teleports us all to a better, less lovely city.

Tsyni posted:

K - Fall to our knees, draw our knife, cut deeply into our hand, and beckon Asherah will all of our mental energy.

All this blood is already figuratively on our hands, may as be literally too.

This is a more fun option than the other ones.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 01:46

Pladdicus: Aug 13, 2010

WE COULD SAVE EVERYONE GUYS! CHANGE VOTE TO->

Z BECOME EL. SMITE ALL (EXCEPT FOR GOOD PEOPLE)

# ? Dec 22, 2013 01:47

the_steve: Nov 9, 2005; We're always hiring!

K - Look for a club or staff or any sort of blunt weapon. Get to Danal, take his captors down as NONLETHALLY as possible. Get Danal to an exit, and have him run like hell. Tell him to find Ishamal.

With Danal out of the way, we enter the melee and try to incapacitate anyone from Team Bareen that we can. Do not kill unless we're forced to. And keep a WIDE berth from Bareen or anyone else with powers.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 01:49

FoxTerrier: Feb 15, 2012; Perfectly logical poster who uses the tools available to him to come to solid conclusions

Pladdicus posted:

D They WILL unhand him! (This will non-lethal unless they turn murdery hostile then maybe please call a vote to switch?)
+
I Please El, protect our brother Danal, protect our father Tudiya, our mother, Jalitha, our love, Naomi. Please give me the strength to see it done. Summarized with a mighty "EL!"

I want to save Pabel, but I don't want those guys to have a chance to hurt Danal in some kind of stupid panic. Or try to run off with him.

I would vote for the bow, but I doubt we can very clean shots under the circumstances. We'll just have to do what we can with our knives and whatever we can get off fallen fighters.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 01:57

Diogines: Dec 22, 2007; Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

The following is a ROUGH APPROXIMATION of the temple and persons therein. The exact number of people and spacial proportions are not precise, to give you a general idea of the layout:

Diogines fucked around with this message at 02:11 on Dec 22, 2013

# ? Dec 22, 2013 01:58

Canuck-Errant: Oct 28, 2003; MOOD: BURNING - MUSIC: DISCO INFERNO BY THE TRAMMPS; Grimey Drawer

We came here to do archery, and archery is what we're going to do. Time to shoot some arrows with exquisite precision, chaps.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 02:02

HiHo ChiRho: Oct 23, 2010

So.. we have two daggers, our bow, and our massive body strength. There are farmers next to Paebel that are unarmed and really close by.

I'm thinking help them and, offering weapons from either on our body or from downed followers, run to Danal. Strength in numbers!

Switching my vote to:

Mr Apollo posted:

Friends then Danal then Everybody else. Try to rally and organize those scattered throughout the temple fighting for El.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 02:03

ColonelMuttonchops: Feb 18, 2011; Young Orc

Well, paebel is pretty close to us. We should F, go save him and his friends, then go after Danal. Tudiya and co are going to be busy with Bareen probably, and the foreign adventurers seem to have things under control, roughly. We can figure he rest out after we get Paebel and Danal.

E: vvvv also pray to El. Though less of a prayer and more just screaming "EL!" as loud as you can.

ColonelMuttonchops fucked around with this message at 02:36 on Dec 22, 2013

# ? Dec 22, 2013 02:04

my dad: Oct 17, 2012; this shall be humorous

Ah, this changes thing a bit.

THIS IS A CHANGED VOTE

Smash our way to Paebel, then head for Danal together and shoot anyone who gets in the way.

If (and only if) we get a clear shot at Bareen's back, shoot her.

Pray to El all the way.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 02:05

paragon1: Nov 22, 2010; FULL COMMUNISM NOW

my dad posted:

Ah, this changes thing a bit.

THIS IS A CHANGED VOTE

Smash our way to Paebel, then head for Danal together and shoot anyone who gets in the way.

If (and only if) we get a clear shot at Bareen's back, shoot her.

Pray to El all the way.

This

# ? Dec 22, 2013 02:09

gnarl: Jul 28, 2010; Soiled Meat

paragon1 posted:

This

Yup.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 02:13

jazzyhattrick: Jul 1, 2010; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

With quick shooting clear those of bareen's men standing between us and paebel, there don't seem to be many of them, order him and his friends to follow us as we make a bee line for danal.

The first of bareen's followers we come across we should punch through their abdomen and pull out their intestines, a feat I'm pretty sure we're strong enough to manage on a non blooded person at this stage. Swing the guts around over our heads shouting that anyone who wants the same treatment should come and get some. Most of the lesser followers will break and run, giving us a clear shot at the more hardened adventurers.

We know that when the chips are down are when our might shots are usually most likely to occur, so we can take out the remaining people between danal and his guards with eye shots.

Finally we should fire 2 arrows at once into each of the men guarding danal, just because it's awesome. Then we get the hell out of dodge.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 02:15

Zybourne Clock: Oct 25, 2011; Poke me.

Diogines posted:

The following is a ROUGH APPROXIMATION of the temple and persons therein. The exact number of people and spacial proportions are not precise, to give you a general idea of the layout:

Well, this changes things considerably. I originally believed Danal to be close to one of the temple's exits, which would have made it much easier to free him. I think our best choice right now would be to do the thing we're best at, which is ~~surviving concussions~~ shooting things.

J. Climb the altar, and shoot the opponents closest to Paebel/Danal.

I might change this vote later depending on the outcome of this question, because conditional votes are awful: Diog, can we see Aaron in the Mighty Man crowd?

e: Apparently we can see Aaron in the crowd, Diogines confirmed this on IRC. He's the Mighty Man with great eyesight and is also a very fast runner. Tudiya and crew might not be able to see Danal from where they are standing, and the king and his other king friend are probably going to attack Bareen on sight. By jumping onto the altar and signaling Danal's position to Aaron, we can probably speed up the rescue mission quite a bit.

Zybourne Clock fucked around with this message at 02:48 on Dec 22, 2013

# ? Dec 22, 2013 02:23

HiHo ChiRho: Oct 23, 2010

I figured I would redeem myself for my terrible reading comprehension that changed the D vote option, so for people that have missed it:

Diogines posted:

F. A scattering of people inside of the temple have decided to fight against Bareen's men... Paebel among them, who is closer to you than options B through E.

Diogines in IRC posted:

A number of people within the temple, who are probably Bareens followers, have turned on her. Probably in light of... famous adventurers calling her insane, and them taking you and Danal hostage.

Paebel is part of the group fighting against Bareen's men.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 02:25

Diogines: Dec 22, 2007; Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

Paebel has worked for the temple as long as you have known him, first as a servant, then a scout and hunter. You know him to share Bareen's faith. Something in the events which have just occurred have caused him to turn on Bareen.

A handful of people in the temple who were probably Bareen's followers, or perhaps people just there for the party, have turned on Bareen. They are vastly outnumbered and all of them are surrounded.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 02:30

Speleothing: May 6, 2008; Spare batteries are pretty key.

Sticking with plan J, we climb on top of the Altar and shoot anyone who tries to lay a hand on us.

(No change to my earlier vote)

# ? Dec 22, 2013 02:35

dyzzy: Dec 22, 2009; argh

Well seeing the map kinda changes my thinking. He's close enough that I'm changing my vote from D to F, then D

# ? Dec 22, 2013 02:36

Ralith: Jan 12, 2011; I see a ship in the harbor
I can and shall obey
But if it wasn't for your misfortune
I'd be a heavenly person today

Mr Apollo posted:

Friends then Danal then Everybody else. Try to rally and organize those scattered throughout the temple fighting for El.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 02:40

FoxTerrier: Feb 15, 2012; Perfectly logical poster who uses the tools available to him to come to solid conclusions

dyzzy posted:

Well seeing the map kinda changes my thinking. He's close enough that I'm changing my vote from D to F, then D

Ditto.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 02:42

Volmarias: Dec 31, 2002; EMAIL... THE INTERNET... SEARCH ENGINES...

Canuck-Errant posted:

We came here to do archery, and archery is what we're going to do. Time to shoot some arrows with exquisite precision, chaps.

This, please.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 02:56

Crudus: Nov 14, 2006

F, then D

Give our knives to Paebel's friends to use, then use our bow as we make for Danal

Snarls is still out there finding Ish, so I'm sure more help is inbound. Expect another wall to explode as Ish arrives with his flying, golden god powers.

Edit: I'm against calling out to El as a battle cry.

Crudus fucked around with this message at 03:09 on Dec 22, 2013

# ? Dec 22, 2013 03:01

A Terrible Person: Jan 8, 2012; The Dance of Friendship; Fun Shoe

Bareen is headed toward Tudiya.

Tudiya is headed toward Bareen.

The both of them are super-powered monsters, each of whom is individually able to turn this entire temple to dust with a single blow.

They also both want us alive.

Voting K: Put every ounce of our being into dashing between Bareen and Tudiya; they can't turn everyone else into collateral damage if we're in the way. If trying this saps our energy and knocks us out, so be it. Maybe Fake-Jorah will be more willing to talk in light of this turn of events. Also, pray to El to guide us.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 03:03

jazzyhattrick: Jul 1, 2010; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Volmarias posted:

This, please.

Enkidel steps over several arrow filled corpses, in front of him is a fine bow, the prize for the contest.

"Well I came here for an archery competition *picks up prize bow* And I'm pretty sure I won"

# ? Dec 22, 2013 03:03

Cat Wings: Oct 12, 2012

Mr Apollo posted:

Friends then Danal then Everybody else. Try to rally and organize those scattered throughout the temple fighting for El.

THIS

# ? Dec 22, 2013 03:03

Diogines: Dec 22, 2007; Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

Using your bow while still in the general melee around you is going to be very tough. Not impossible, but hard.

Diogines fucked around with this message at 03:18 on Dec 22, 2013

# ? Dec 22, 2013 03:09

Kristopher: Jun 28, 2006

dyzzy posted:

Well seeing the map kinda changes my thinking. He's close enough that I'm changing my vote from D to F, then D

Well, If we can keep our friends and brother close, why not? Switching my vote to this!

# ? Dec 22, 2013 03:12

Crudus: Nov 14, 2006

Diogines posted:

Using your bow in the general melee around you is going to be very tough. Not impossible, but hard.

You said the same about shooting a giant scorpion in the eye, and I voted against it.

Fool me once, shame on you...

# ? Dec 22, 2013 03:12

100 HOGS AGREE: Oct 13, 2007; Grimey Drawer

jazzyhattrick posted:

Enkidel steps over several arrow filled corpses, in front of him is a fine bow, the prize for the contest.

"Well I came here for an archery competition *picks up prize bow* And I'm pretty sure I won"

Ahahaha we need to do this.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 03:14

Lanky Coconut Tree: Apr 7, 2011; An angry tree.

The angriest tree

Mr Apollo posted:

Friends then Danal then Everybody else. Try to rally and organize those scattered throughout the temple fighting for El.

Voting this.

But what's that you say? The bow is going to be tough to use?

RIP A LIMB OFF THE FIRST PERSON TO GET IN OUR WAY AND USE IT AS A CLUB :getin:

# ? Dec 22, 2013 03:15

Lanky Coconut Tree: Apr 7, 2011; An angry tree.

The angriest tree

Also I vote that when this is over we get some answers by threatening to off ourselves if they don't be straightup with us. You don't tell us what we want? Fine gently caress you, didn't want this life anyway. gently caress your plans, let's see how well they work out with just a corpse.

# ? Dec 22, 2013 03:16

Nolaterif: Jan 10, 2003

It makes me irrationally happy that we got a punch in. :neckbeard:

ColonelMuttonchops posted:

Well, paebel is pretty close to us. We should F, go save him and his friends, then go after Danal. Tudiya and co are going to be busy with Bareen probably, and the foreign adventurers seem to have things under control, roughly. We can figure he rest out after we get Paebel and Danal.

This, only because Paebel is closer. If we have to prioritize, then choose Danal.

F, D

And this too, please:

jazzyhattrick posted:

Enkidel steps over several arrow filled corpses, in front of him is a fine bow, the prize for the contest.

"Well I came here for an archery competition *picks up prize bow* And I'm pretty sure I won"

# ? Dec 22, 2013 03:21

HiHo ChiRho: Oct 23, 2010

Lanky Coconut Tree posted:

Voting this.

But what's that you say? The bow is going to be tough to use?

RIP A LIMB OFF THE FIRST PERSON TO GET IN OUR WAY AND USE IT AS A CLUB

Well I thought of something similar:

code:

01:34:23: <HiHoChiRho> I'm thinking we run up to Paebel and the farmers, smash two servants heads in together with our bare hands
01:34:47: <diog> <HiHoChiRho> So Bareen's followers are mostly freed slaves and adventurers, right?
01:34:49: <BirdoPrey> give in to asherah and start eating everyone
01:34:57: <HiHoChiRho> and toss the weapons they were holding to the farmers saying "COME WITH ME IF YOU WANT TO LIVE"
01:35:05: <HiHoChiRho> as they stare in disbelief

also for those missing out on IRC chat:

code:

01:14:39: <HiHoChiRho> Diog:
01:14:45: <HiHoChiRho> is it possible if we truly
01:14:50: <HiHoChiRho> TRULY believe
01:14:57: <diog> (you dont, fyi)
01:15:04: <HiHoChiRho> that we can poo poo,
01:15:04: <diog> only a small minority at this point actually do
01:15:11: <diog> maybe
01:15:11: <diog> oh
01:15:13: <HiHoChiRho> we can unleash a torrent
01:15:17: <diog> Yes
01:15:19: <diog> the answer is yes
01:15:23: <HiHoChiRho> hahaha
01:15:40: <HiHoChiRho> The Great poo poo Flood of 548
01:15:52: <Gnarl> lol
01:15:54: <HiHoChiRho> hundreds dead
01:15:59: <HiHoChiRho> thousands of refugees
01:16:15: <HiHoChiRho> lead to the greatest harvests in Zepath for over a CENTURY
01:16:47: <Gnarl> Just Zepath?

Also a lot of talk about circumcision. Because why not?

# ? Dec 22, 2013 03:23

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# ? Jun 9, 2024 22:46

dyzzy: Dec 22, 2009; argh

Goons just can't get away from dick, imaginary or not

# ? Dec 22, 2013 03:24

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Traditional Games > The Game Room > Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens - Choose Your Own Adventure

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