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Chemmy
Feb 4, 2001

The Midniter posted:

I drove 12 hours straight today, from Charlotte, NC to Shelton, CT.

Hotel room? You couldn't stay with SOBB?

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therattle
Jul 24, 2007
Soiled Meat

PainBreak posted:

A couple of nights ago, I had one of those "so detailed, it's almost reality" dreams.

I was running my own butcher shop, and making custom charcuterie for customers. People would bring in their deer, elk, duck, pheasant, etc, and I would come up with a way to cure/smoke/sausage/whatever.

Everything was going great, until I received a human leg that someone wanted made into a ham. Reluctantly, I created a beautiful, spiral sliced, hickory smoked human ham from the leg for my customer.

Then, they kept showing up. Two, three, six human hams hanging in the meat locker. What the gently caress?

That's when I woke up. I rolled over, checked the time, and checked Facebook. The first post was from a restaurant I like to eat at, and their special was misspelled.

"Wine Braised Short Rob with Creamy Polenta."

I love it! That is hilarious in a gruesome way

Skinny King Pimp
Aug 25, 2011
Skinny Queen Wimp

Chemmy posted:

Hotel room? You couldn't stay with SOBB?

Why would you bother with a hotel room for just 12 hours of driving?

PainBreak
Jun 9, 2001

therattle posted:

I love it! That is hilarious in a gruesome way



NOOOOOOOO!

therattle
Jul 24, 2007
Soiled Meat

PainBreak posted:



NOOOOOOOO!

It's what he would have wanted. RIP Rob.

Doh004
Apr 22, 2007

Mmmmm Donuts...

therattle posted:

It's what he would have wanted. RIP Rob.

His name is Robert Paulson.

Daeren
Aug 18, 2009

YER MUSTACHE IS CROOKED

Doh004 posted:

His name is Robert Paulson.

"UGH! Meatloaf, again!?"

mindphlux
Jan 8, 2004

by R. Guyovich
what do y'all cook for holiday times? I'm doing my second xmas with my wife's family, and I am finding it really interesting to integrate everyone's traditions.

for my family, we always just had a glazed ham on xmas eve, usually with some green beans or some basic side items and then ate the leftovers the next day

my wife's family doesn't even eat together on the 24th, they just all get together on the 25th during the day and do a gigantic lunchtime thing, with turkey and stuffing and cranberry sauce and poo poo. I keep on joking that they've gotten xmas and thanksgiving mixed up. but, I can roll with the flow so long as I get my ham and rumcake! =)

anyways, would be curious what other folks do.

a dozen swans
Aug 24, 2012

mindphlux posted:

what do y'all cook for holiday times? I'm doing my second xmas with my wife's family, and I am finding it really interesting to integrate everyone's traditions.

for my family, we always just had a glazed ham on xmas eve, usually with some green beans or some basic side items and then ate the leftovers the next day

my wife's family doesn't even eat together on the 24th, they just all get together on the 25th during the day and do a gigantic lunchtime thing, with turkey and stuffing and cranberry sauce and poo poo. I keep on joking that they've gotten xmas and thanksgiving mixed up. but, I can roll with the flow so long as I get my ham and rumcake! =)

anyways, would be curious what other folks do.

My family traditionally does ham on the 24th and a turkey on the 25th. We're talking 10-15 people at each, though, so there are lots of sides (scalloped potatoes, brussels sprouts, asparagus, mashed root veg, and a bunch of other rotating stuff) and now we do a vegan/halal main both days as well so people aren't just eating sides and bread. My aunt always makes Yorkshire puddings (so good, oh my god), and an uncle does really great pumpkin and apple pies. We drink mulled wine, and Boxing Day is leftover sandwiches on fresh bread.

e: VVV that sounds really good, calvados rocks

a dozen swans fucked around with this message at 00:24 on Dec 23, 2013

therattle
Jul 24, 2007
Soiled Meat
We're Jewish but sometimes have Xmas for chums. No tradition really apart from a brioche-based bread and butter pudding with calvados-soaked raisins and brandy butter caramel sauce. It's amazing. Jerusalem fartichokes too.

Raikyn
Feb 22, 2011

Christmas is a little bit different in our part of the world, being summer.


I got given the task today to get some fruit.

Freshly picked strawberries, nectarines, peaches, boysenberries and blueberries.
Also got some chocolates from the chocolate factory, and some nice Hawkes Bay wine :)





The Midniter
Jul 9, 2001

Chemmy posted:

Hotel room? You couldn't stay with SOBB?

The plans for someone to watch my dog at home fell through so SDBB and his wife were gracious enough to watch him while I spend the week in the hotel room that my mom was so glad to reserve for me for a week because she had enough points to cover me. Luckily my dog is super chill and having a great time despite hating the 12 hour drive.

Disco Salmon
Jun 19, 2004

mindphlux posted:

what do y'all cook for holiday times? I'm doing my second xmas with my wife's family, and I am finding it really interesting to integrate everyone's traditions.

for my family, we always just had a glazed ham on xmas eve, usually with some green beans or some basic side items and then ate the leftovers the next day

my wife's family doesn't even eat together on the 24th, they just all get together on the 25th during the day and do a gigantic lunchtime thing, with turkey and stuffing and cranberry sauce and poo poo. I keep on joking that they've gotten xmas and thanksgiving mixed up. but, I can roll with the flow so long as I get my ham and rumcake! =)

anyways, would be curious what other folks do.

For us, the 24th is always seafood...usually steamed clams in a white wine based broth ( with a fresh loaf of bread to serve with it), and raw Pacific oysters (usually Fanny Bay or Sisters Point), cracked steamed Dungeness crab, cold cooked shrimp with cocktail sauce (and Mary Rose sauce for the younger set), and some sort of pasta.

The 25th is usually Greek style lamb, or a honeybaked ham, and maybe occasionally a nice beef dish of some sort but never turkey or chicken. Sides include mashed potatoes or celeriac (or a mix of the two), gravy (unless its lamb then not), roasted Brussels sprouts or brocollini, and a salad etc. Sparkling cider and a nice wine and there you go. It's pretty simple compared to Thanksgiving. It also depends on if my Dad is there or not, since he is diabetic. If he is there I make changes accordingly so he can enjoy dinner as well and not feel singled out.

Dessert on the 25th is usually an English trifle or maybe a treacle pudding, or a sticky toffee pudding. If my dad is there we also make a sugar free dessert as well, usually some sort of diabetic friendly chocolate thing for him since he loves it so much. Just depends really on what we felt like making.

Disco Salmon fucked around with this message at 06:23 on Dec 23, 2013

mindphlux
Jan 8, 2004

by R. Guyovich

Disco Salmon posted:

For us, the 24th is always seafood...usually steamed clams in a white wine based broth ( with a fresh loaf of bread to serve with it), and raw Pacific oysters (usually Fanny Bay or Sisters Point), cracked steamed Dungeness crab, cold cooked shrimp with cocktail sauce (and Mary Rose sauce for the younger set), and some sort of pasta.

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm seafood. I totally forgot that was a holiday thing for a lot of people. I should totally bring that tradition into my life.

Mr. Wiggles
Dec 1, 2003

We are all drinking from the highball glass of ideology.
We normally do a ham on Christmas day, since Christmas eve is for the vigil mass and what have you. Christmas morning after presents we have hot chocolate and sopapillas.

GrAviTy84
Nov 25, 2004

Wife and I are staying home by ourselves for the first time on christmas eve. I haven't effort fooded in a while. Am thinking of doing a 12 course tasting menu for the two of us. Should be fun.

Skinny King Pimp
Aug 25, 2011
Skinny Queen Wimp
With my mom, we always do roast beef and yorkshire pudding and other things that are way less important than yorkshire pudding. The date varies, since my parents are divorced, but lately it's generally been on Christmas day. This year will be the first year at her new apartment in Texas, so that will be interesting.

And mini rant about holiday logistics: My dad and stepmom are in Georgia, my mom is in Texas, and my in laws are in Wisconsin. My stepmom has a son and a daughter, both of whom are married and have kids, but neither of whom are married to the other parent of said kid. My stepbrother is remarried to a girl who already had two kids of her own. Scheduling this poo poo is a loving nightmare. I'm just happy everybody involved is cool with visiting when we can and not too worried about what the date is.

Good thing there are several bottles of wine and a couple of bottles of bourbon in the bar at dad's house right now.

Very Strange Things
May 21, 2008

therattle posted:

We're Jewish but sometimes have Xmas for chums. No tradition really apart from a brioche-based bread and butter pudding with calvados-soaked raisins and brandy butter caramel sauce. It's amazing. Jerusalem fartichokes too.

Sorry I keep spelling "yid" in Words...

therattle
Jul 24, 2007
Soiled Meat

Very Strange Things posted:

Sorry I keep spelling "yid" in Words...

Don't worry: I make "goy" when I have to! What's your username? I'll play you! I'll go Inglourious Basterds on your rear end.

Very Strange Things
May 21, 2008

therattle posted:

Don't worry: I make "goy" when I have to! What's your username? I'll play you! I'll go Inglourious Basterds on your rear end.

I can't remember, but I'm pretty sure we've been playing for a couple years and are pretty dead even. I just spelled "hurtles" and "mis" for 17 points and I'm winning this one.

edit: just won 5 seconds ago.

therattle
Jul 24, 2007
Soiled Meat

Very Strange Things posted:

I can't remember, but I'm pretty sure we've been playing for a couple years and are pretty dead even. I just spelled "hurtles" and "mis" for 17 points and I'm winning this one.

edit: just won 5 seconds ago.

Oh yeah! I never remember your SA name. I think you mostly beat me. Anyone else, I'm open. Richard Man is my Words username.

Force de Fappe
Nov 7, 2008

Roast crisp pork belly, sweet-sour cabbage, pork meatballs and pork sausage.

We consume the Pig of Solstice in the name of Frey that the Gods will bring back the sun and grant us another spring :black101:

Happy Hat
Aug 11, 2008

He just wants someone to shake his corks, is that too much to ask??

Sjurygg posted:

Roast crisp pork belly, sweet-sour cabbage, pork meatballs and pork sausage.

We consume the Pig of Solstice in the name of Frey that the Gods will bring back the sun and grant us another spring :black101:

As it should be. The heathens don't understand the sacrifice we make to keep ragnarok away, and ensure that they will live on a year more.

Yesterday I informed Mussa, a 21 year old Muslim Maldivian delegate that we, in Scandinavia, had two celebrations. One of the white Christ, on December 24th, and one of winter solstice where we would dance naked in our stone spirals (yeah, stealing a bit from other cultures) - the most holy of nights would be the ones where there is a full moon.

I invited him to the party.

He looked scared.

GrAviTy84
Nov 25, 2004

So Mario Batali and I are pretty much besties now.

https://twitter.com/guitarmanmatt/status/415183378808205312

Doh004
Apr 22, 2007

Mmmmm Donuts...

GrAviTy84 posted:

So Mario Batali and I are pretty much besties now.

https://twitter.com/guitarmanmatt/status/415183378808205312

Totally jelly :allears:

dino.
Mar 28, 2010

Yip Yip, bitch.
Dear LiveJournal,
So Puppy and I went to Rockefeller Centre to see the tree. Got off at the Rockefeller Centre subway stop. Both of us realised that we had no clue where the hell they kept the tree. We've lived in this city for years, and didn't know how to find the thing. He said, "Don't worry, I've got a backup plan. Turn left over there, and let's go." On the way, I said that we should maybe nip into FAO Schwarz. "That was the backup plan!" He can still read me so well, and knows how to cheer me up. A block or so later, there it was. The promenade where they keep the tree.

God drat that thing is huge and gaudy and lit up like mad. It's gorgeous, and the star on top is enormous. Didn't bother taking pictures, because there were so many people about, and the lighting was kind of poo poo. Also, I find that I remember my memories more when I don't stop to snap a photo. Instead, we talked about how things are going, now that we're apart. It was drizzling the entire time, but I could feel myself warm up from inside, because he is doing OK. He's cut out coffee, and is finally sleeping enough.

We nipped into St. Peter's to light a couple of candles for his mum. It's been rough ever since she died, both for him and for me, because she was one of those women who you can't help but to love once you meet her. She and I got along swimmingly, and never had that mother-in-law tension that some people report. Also lit a couple of candles for his living family. The church is so beautiful inside, although the scaffolding gives the place this cheap look. Either way. After doing a circuit in there, we headed back out to hit up FAO. All the stores along 5th were decked out. Harry Winston and Bvlgari were the winners though. Harry Winston had bright sparkly jewel looking lights all along the windows in front of the building, and Bvlgari had this giant sparkly snake looking thing. Bergdorf Goodman was pretty fancy too. Each window had a different scene in it.

FAO Schwarz wasn't nearly as crowded as we expected. That was the Apple store. We looked at the giant stuffed animals, goofed around with the various shades and types of hand puppets, and pretty much regressed to 8 year old status. I wanted the night to last longer, but it started getting cold in earnest. He offered me his coat, which I was grateful for. It kept me from feeling too cold on the way back to the subway.

I know it's not Xmas day, but I got what I've asked for the past I don't recall how many years: that Puppy be happy and healthy.

Can't wait to head out to NJ tomorrow for my Italian friend's giant blow-out party.

Your pal,
Dino

Happy Hat
Aug 11, 2008

He just wants someone to shake his corks, is that too much to ask??
Merry Christmas goon-buddies!

I wish you all the best and the happiness that you deserve!

Love!

Happy Hat

therattle
Jul 24, 2007
Soiled Meat

Happy Hat posted:

Merry Christmas goon-buddies!

I wish you all the best and the happiness that you deserve!

Love!

Happy Hat

Likewise, HH! You deserve it more than most!

Dane
Jun 18, 2003

mmm... creamy.

Happy Hat posted:

Merry Christmas goon-buddies!

I wish you all the best and the happiness that you deserve!

Love!

Happy Hat

Glædelig jul!

PopeCrunch
Feb 13, 2004

internets

That sounds lovely, dino :)

therattle
Jul 24, 2007
Soiled Meat
Oh, dino, I meant to tell you that the other day using techniques picked up from you I made the most amazingly delicious tarns dal. I doubt I'll actually be able to recreate it, it was so drat good. I used coconut oil, and got it so hot that those spices popped like fleas and added some chopped onion that I'd kept aside. I initially thought I'd burned the onion and spices but when I added it to the dal (lentils, onions, garlic, turmeric, water, coconut milk) it was just delicious.

We recently made your carrot, cumin, mustard seed and lime/lemon juice dish, which has become a regular, and Leo (aged 2 1/3) loved it. He's got good taste, that boy.

Yawgmoth
Sep 10, 2003

This post is cursed!
The toilet exploded or something during the night (my roommate woke me up at 2am with "I just flushed it, that's all!" and the hallway is a swampland) so I had to piss in the alley and am also not getting to shower this morning before work, where I will have to deal with a hundred thousand people freaking out over christmas eve not being perfect right this second and it will somehow be my fault that they didn't buy their $700 of groceries until the last minute.

Merry christmas.

bloody ghost titty
Oct 23, 2008

tHROW SOME D"s ON THAT BIZNATCH
I'm having my second Xmas not in the northeast or somewhere cold: the rents retired to Florida, where I'm currently enduring the horror of it being 77 and sunny. Happy Christmas, goons, may we all feel loved. And get stupid high on good eats.

mindphlux
Jan 8, 2004

by R. Guyovich
LET THE HAM SMOKING COMMENCE

mindphlux
Jan 8, 2004

by R. Guyovich
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm




AllTerrineVehicle
Jan 8, 2010

I'm great at boats!

mindphlux posted:

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm






That's a good lookin' ham you got there.

Force de Fappe
Nov 7, 2008

mindphlux posted:

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm






would

SymmetryrtemmyS
Jul 13, 2013

I got super tired of seeing your avatar throwing those fuckin' glasses around in the astrology thread so I fixed it to a .jpg
That ham looks amazing. Hoard it.

Kenning
Jan 11, 2009

I really want to post goatse. Instead I only have these🍄.



Happy Christmas spoongoons. I'm gonna hang out with my dad it will be chill. Hope y'all have someone to hang out with.

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Happy Hat
Aug 11, 2008

He just wants someone to shake his corks, is that too much to ask??
On my way home... It is insanely surreal how not trashed the world is.

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