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I have four kids, three of whom are three or under. This woman pretty much described my life right now: http://shortwinded.net/so-you-would-like-to-have-three-children/
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Dec 28, 2013 20:00
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Regarding "no touching", around 15? months (maybe 16?), what started working for us was just saying "If you touch the cat food (or whatever) again, you're going to be put in time out, okay?" Most of the time, she gets it and goes to do something else, instead. We also have gotten her to know the word "yucky" (thanks to Leslie Patricelli's "Yummy Yucky" book), and some of the places we don't want her to go (cat litter box, for example), we just identify as yucky, and it's a bit of a deterrent.
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Dec 28, 2013 21:53
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Axiem posted:Regarding "no touching", around 15? months (maybe 16?), what started working for us was just saying "If you touch the cat food (or whatever) again, you're going to be put in time out, okay?" Most of the time, she gets it and goes to do something else, instead. My kid's almost three, and doesn't really respond to "no." I'm sure part of it is his ASD, but right now I work on just having a physical deterrent. He's getting a bit better, and I think part of it is I've just given up on the non important things at home and have turned them into a bit of a game (mainly to save my sanity), and focus on things which are important (like safety issues, property damage - I figured after 3 years, he cats can fend for themselves.) My favourite was when I was visiting my cousin who has a daughter born within a few months of my kid. I noticed she had no locks or other childproofing on her cabinets. When I mentioned it, her response was "Oh, she got curious about them last week, and I just told her no - hasn't touched them since!" Her daughter is like this weird robot kid that likes personal grooming, tea parties, and cleaning. Not that I'm jealous, or anything. I try and console myself into thinking it must be really boring to not operate on high-alert all day.
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Dec 31, 2013 07:26
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Arthur is six and a half months now. He used to love being on his changing table and getting changed, but now anytime I take him to his table he immediately starts crying. I can calm him down by telling him I'm just changing him, and hand him a toy to keep his hands busy and get on with business, but it's really weird. I'm not sure why he immediately gets upset. Really if I start taking him towards the back of the house at all, he gets mad. My theory is he's linked that half of the house with being put down for a nap.
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Dec 31, 2013 14:39
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greatn posted:Arthur is six and a half months now. He used to love being on his changing table and getting changed, but now anytime I take him to his table he immediately starts crying. I can calm him down by telling him I'm just changing him, and hand him a toy to keep his hands busy and get on with business, but it's really weird. I'm not sure why he immediately gets upset. It's pretty common for babies to get to the point where they don't enjoy or tolerate diaper changes and being dressed as much as they did early on. Maybe it has something to do with ever increasing mobility?
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Dec 31, 2013 16:01
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Yup littledip started hating diaper changes around that time now too. We just stop by his bookcase on the way and he gets to pick a toy to play with while we change his diaper. That helps most of the time.
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Dec 31, 2013 17:57
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Somewhat incidental to this thread, Slate's Lexicon Valley podcast had an episode about children learning the word "no". It's kind of fascinating if you're into that sort of thing.
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Jan 2, 2014 23:59
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Axiem posted:Somewhat incidental to this thread, Slate's Lexicon Valley podcast had an episode about children learning the word "no". It's kind of fascinating if you're into that sort of thing. Thanks for posting this, really interesting. Our 13-month-old started shaking his head "no" at things a few weeks ago and it's awesome. He also does the "uh oh" thing which is hilarious but apparently very common.
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Jan 3, 2014 00:52
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Our 16 month old does No, uh-oh and more recently "Oh noooooo!" in an abnormally high voice. She almost sounds sarcastic, which makes this equal parts hilarious and frustrating.
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Jan 3, 2014 05:57
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VorpalBunny posted:Dudes carrying babies: Honestly, Bjorns and stuff are becoming so popular, I am pretty used to seeing dads carrying kids these days. I don't think it's a big deal to anyone, just make sure the kid is comfy and survives the ride. I, uh, I just don't get the objections to this. What on this planet could possibly be MORE manly than proudly displaying one's ability to not only sire progeny but also carry and protect said progeny from the hazards of the world?
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Jan 3, 2014 06:46
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Groke posted:I, uh, I just don't get the objections to this. What on this planet could possibly be MORE manly than proudly displaying one's ability to not only sire progeny but also carry and protect said progeny from the hazards of the world? It's a goddamn cruel joke how much female attention I get wearing a baby. I should have borrowed one when I was single.
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Jan 3, 2014 06:52
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To be fair, I spend a lot of time on playdates with a stay-at-home dad and he gets more concerned looks from people than anything else, like he's about to abduct a child rather than play with one. He was kicked out of a mommy & me group, and they told him it was because he's a man.
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Jan 3, 2014 08:58
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Just to put my money where my mouth is: (Myself and #1 son when he was little)
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Jan 3, 2014 15:38
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My little monster is 19 months. She won't do her bedtime ritual for the last 3 weeks. Anytime we put her in her crib she wakes up immediately and screams until she's taken out. If we leave her in there, she will eventually make herself throw up. She used to go to bed at 8 or 830. Now she stays awake until 10:30+ before finally finding a place to curl up and pass out. My strategy is just let her do whatever with all lights/tv low, just make sure she is safe and not making herself puke. Sometimes she just walks around whining for mom (who is upstairs sleeping by 8, 3 months pregnant), sometimes she sits with me and reads books or watches animal videos on youtube. This goes on until between 12 to 1, when I go to bed. If I put her in her crib, she wakes up immediately screaming, so wife co-sleeps with her in the spare room. Please tell me this is a phase that will end soon  However she is now telling us when she needs to pee or poop or just did, but won't actually use the potty yet. It's nice to not have to change a poop diaper that's been squished around for a bit.
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Jan 3, 2014 19:20
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Watching videos before bed probably won't help very much, though if she is accustomed to it it would be impossible to explain at that age that she can't watch videos at night anymore.
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Jan 3, 2014 19:32
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Nah that's real easy to stop. My wife can't deal with her crying over stuff like that, but I'm a wall and baby knows it.
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Jan 3, 2014 19:34
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Speaking of crying babies, we're trying to teach our 6 month old that she doesn't need to be attached to my boob to fall asleep. She's fallen asleep "on her own" for four days straight - I say "on her own" because I'm fairly sure she's basically collapsing from exhaustion after screaming her little head off for 1-2 hours. And we're not going for a cry it out-approach, quite the opposite, my husband and I are taking turns being with her, singing, shhhing and rocking her, putting her down in her bed if/when she calms down, but she's just screaming in alternating fury and despair over not being allowed to nurse herself to sleep. The first couple of days she fell asleep fairly quickly after crying for a bit, but she's screamed for longer and longer the last couple of days, and it's just horrible to listen to, but the only way to stop her screaming is to break out the boob and I don't want to keep nursing her to sleep - it takes forever (she keeps waking up as soon as she's put in her bed and needs more boob to fall asleep, and then wakes up again and needs more boob and then spits up from all the milk she drinks without intending to) and it makes it hard for us as a family that I'm the only one that can put the baby to bed. Are we doing something wrong? I'll tough it out if that's what it takes, but for now I feel like I'm breaking my baby  vvv She won't take a pacifier, unfortunately. That'd solve all our problems, since what she wants is to suckle something while falling asleep. But apparently it has to be my boob. We've tried a ton of different pacifiers, but she just gnaws on them and gets upset. Sockmuppet fucked around with this message at 20:24 on Jan 3, 2014 |
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Jan 3, 2014 19:52
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I hold my son close to my chest with a pacifier and rub his back while white noise plays and I shush him. He's the same age, it works alright but only after bathtime and story at night, in his sleeper blanket. If I try to do it for a nap he goes ballistic.
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Jan 3, 2014 20:18
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Can you nurse her until she's almost asleep and put her in her crib/rock her/whatever when she is just barely awake and slowly increase how alert she is when you remove her from boob and put her in her crib/start rocking? Edit: I nurse my 6.5 month old son to sleep because it is usually very easy and I don't mind. He will fall asleep for others at bedtime, especially if food is involved. However, you may need to leave the house if you are sticking with the not nursing until she is more accustomed to it. My son we almost always can't just put down but a couple nights ago he wasn't content to nurse to sleep, would quiet down but not get heavy eyed at all while rocking so while he was quiet but still quite alert I put him in his crib, said "goodnight Ben!" And left the room. I heard him rolling about but he wasn't fussing at all. Ten minutes layer he was sound asleep. 8-O This would never have happened even a few weeks ago and I did nothing special to make it happen. Babies will eventually sleep, some just take more time getting there.  . I'm hoping it happens more and more often now but I'm not counting on it.
sheri fucked around with this message at 21:41 on Jan 3, 2014 |
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Jan 3, 2014 21:35
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sheri posted:Can you nurse her until she's almost asleep and put her in her crib/rock her/whatever when she is just barely awake and slowly increase how alert she is when you remove her from boob and put her in her crib/start rocking? That's why we started trying to teach her to fall asleep without me in the first place. Nursing to sleep used to be a quick and easy way to put her down for the night, but over the last two months or so it's become an increasingly drawn out affair where she's wide awake as soon as she hits the mattress in her own bed and won't settle without more boob, and every time she wakes up she needs to nurse longer and longer before she'll calm down again, so I figured the time was right to teach her that she can fall asleep in other ways too. The first two days she cried a bit, then settled down and fell asleep for someone other than me for the first time ever, but now it's taking two hours to put her to sleep, with added screaming throughout. We'll try a couple of more days to see if she takes the hint, if not I'll go back to doing things her way again for a while and try again later to let her mature a bit more like you say, hours of screaming every night aren't pleasant for anyone
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Jan 3, 2014 23:30
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Have you tried changing the bedtime? We had this issue awhile ago, probably around 6 or 7 months. Pushing bedtime back 30 minutes helped so much.
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Jan 4, 2014 00:17
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Wojtek posted:My little monster is 19 months. She won't do her bedtime ritual for the last 3 weeks. Anytime we put her in her crib she wakes up immediately and screams until she's taken out. If we leave her in there, she will eventually make herself throw up. You don't mention how much she naps during the day or what time she wakes up, but she should be having about 12 or 13 hours sleep a day in total. If she's not, it could be that she's increasingly over-tired, making it difficult for her to fall asleep. Have you tried bringing her bedtime forward? Going to bed at 8pm is relatively late (though this depends on what time she wakes up) so you could try putting her down at 7 or 7.30 instead. And if you see any sleep signals - an eye rub, a yawn, laying her head down - start the bedtime routine then, no matter what the time is. However, lots of kids also go through an 18-month sleep regression, so it could be that. In which case all you can do is ride it out and hope that it passes before you lose your mind!
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Jan 4, 2014 00:17
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lady flash posted:Have you tried changing the bedtime? We had this issue awhile ago, probably around 6 or 7 months. Pushing bedtime back 30 minutes helped so much. We've tried putting her to bed earlier, but not later. She'll start rubbing her eyes and spacing out and yawning, so I worry about her getting overtired before I get her into bed. But babies are all about being counter-intuitive, so I'll give it a whirl!
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Jan 4, 2014 00:29
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We are having sleep issues in this house, but it's from a 3-year old who apparently is a night owl like his folks. We "put him to bed" around 9:30pm after a usual routine of bath and story, but he immediately hops out of bed and plays with toys. The Holiday season brought him a new batch of noisy and/or frustrating toys for him so he's very loud for a long time after we put him to bed. We tried a few times to discipline him by taking away toys and privileges, but it only seemed to make the situation worse and everyone's nerves get so frayed that late at night. We find if we leave him alone, telling him to stay quiet if he gets too loud and taking away the loud/frustrating toys, he eventually falls asleep. But sometimes that's not until after midnight! Is this normal? Anyone have tips on keeping a toddler in bed after lights out? We're also going to be putting his little sister in his room with him very soon, she just turned 1-year old. Am I courting disaster? How did others handle this kind of transition? Should I just assume they will be staying up all hours of the night and getting crap sleep until they sort this out naturally?
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Jan 4, 2014 00:51
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The wife and I have a 6 month old, he's been a challenge like most, but we are doing well, considering. I had a real tough time till around 3 months, I was not a fan of the new routine of being a dad at all. Now that there is lots of 2 way interaction with him, things are much better. We are currently working through getting him to go to sleep without the boob in his face and then go back to sleep when he wakes in the middle of the night. So far, it has been going pretty good, 1 week in. This April, we are taking him to Italy for 10 days. He will be about 9 months old then, and I am frankly terrified. 2 of his grandparents will be sitting adjacent to us on the flight (nonstop) and we will do two hour shifts as needed between feeding. He is not a fan of sitting still, and I am doing what I have seen others suggest, toys, distractions and walks down the isle. My bigger concern is the car seat. We have one now, but it is massive ( I do not know if it will fit the car we rent) and he will have outgrown the infant seat as he is almost out of it now (30 lbs capacity my rear end). My wife does not want to rent one from the car agency. What do people do in this situation? I am also fearful that the airline will break the seat tossing it around in transit, or it will get lost, leaving us SOL in Rome. Does anyone have any advice or knowledge on this? Here is our little bear, we're pretty happy how he turned out: 
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Jan 4, 2014 02:56
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Mercury Ballistic posted:
I'd go with one from the rental company, just to avoid the rear end-pain. I suppose you could buy one on the cheap for the baggage tossers, hope for the best, and just leave it on the way home. Considering the cost of an infant seat, even in euro moneys is going to be less than you spend on dinner for 4, it isn't going to be your biggest problem financially or logistically. Way cheaper than buying a whole seat on the plane for the tyke and his Hi-Tek Infant Protection System. I'd probably also pick up a new-but-low-end umbrella stroller at your destination, rather than trying to get all that poo poo through baggage, and leave it at the gate when you fly home.
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Jan 4, 2014 03:11
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Sockmuppet, I always tried to do sleep-related things at naps first, so by the time we tried it at bedtime (when I was more likely to be stressed out by it), it was a little easier going. Mercury Ballistic, I traveled with my then-19-month-old to Greece this September. The Cosco Scenera is $39 and fits in airplane seats even with the armrest down. You can just bring a little piece of rope and tie it to a wheelie suitcase, and then gate-check it when you get to the airplane so there's less chance of it getting damaged. Examine it carefully for white marks when you get it back, because those are signs of impact and the airline will have to replace your seat (this happened when we were forced by AirFrance to check ours with the regular luggage). It's probably even cheaper than renting a carseat, and you know that it's a safe one for him, not expired, hasn't been in any accidents, and so on. Carseat regulations are different all over the world--a cousin wanted to lend me her kid's carseat, but they don't rear-face as long over there, and I wasn't comfortable turning him around in the car-crash capital of Europe. One very important thing is to contact each airline you're using and verify that they allow for gate-checking. AirFrance was a huge pain in the rear end there. It was really rough, I won't lie, but I think it was a harder age. He was just big enough to want to run up and down the aisles, not small enough to fall asleep easily in arms, not old enough to pay attention to a movie reliably, and so on and so forth. The big helpers were that we packed a LOT of food, fruits, yogurt melts, dried fruit and shelf-stable kid yogurt, both for the ride there and the trip back, since the whole sweet kiddie snacks thing wasn't a huge thing in Greece. Ben Davis fucked around with this message at 03:48 on Jan 4, 2014 |
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Jan 4, 2014 03:43
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I've traveled with my now 14 month old several times on a plane. No flight longer than 3 hours though. If you time it with naptimes and mom is ok using a cover to nurse then it's not to horrible. Granted you're going to be on a plane a lot longer but it sounds like you're prepared. I wouldn't stress to much about it because you'll have lots of laps to pass baby back and forth so he has new scenery every so often. Everyone has always been very nice on the planes we've been on. Plus security let's you bring all kinds of things through for the baby, like full water bottles. Having the baby in a carrier through the security line is pretty nice. They haven't made my wife unstrap him but they do give her a hand check pat down. Strollers and car seats are free baggage so if you get a bag for your carseat you can toss extra jackets or what not in with it for free. Speaking of carseats this seat is $40 bucks and only 11 pounds. It should fit in most cars just fine. It's not super padded but it passes all the same safety checks as the other seats. http://www.walmart.com/ip/16932760?...3302590&veh=sem You can gate check car seats which means the baggage carriers won't have as much time to throw them around. You do have to carry it all the way to the gate though so that 11 pound seat might be nice. Plus if you are sick of it at the end of the trip just leave it in Italy and come home to your nice car seat at home. EDIT: I was beaten on the seat We also buy a new toy or two for flights and he doesn't get to see them until the plane so they are OMG WHAT IS THAT I NEED TO PLAY WITH IT NOW brand new. The nursing cover comment. My wife won't nurse in public without one .Shrugs. To each his own. Hdip fucked around with this message at 04:08 on Jan 4, 2014 |
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Jan 4, 2014 03:48
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Hdip posted:If you time it with naptimes and mom is ok using a cover to nurse then it's not to horrible. Uhhhh, why does she need to be comfortable using a cover? She is perfectly free to nurse her child without feeling like she's doing something indecent that needs to be hidden from strangers. A lot of babies won't nurse with a cover over them anyway.
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Jan 4, 2014 03:56
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Mercury Ballistic posted:The wife and I have a 6 month old, he's been a challenge like most, but we are doing well, considering. I had a real tough time till around 3 months, I was not a fan of the new routine of being a dad at all. Now that there is lots of 2 way interaction with him, things are much better. We are currently working through getting him to go to sleep without the boob in his face and then go back to sleep when he wakes in the middle of the night. So far, it has been going pretty good, 1 week in. Your adorable little 6 month old should be flying in a carseat in its own seat for safety reasons. Once you arrive, you will have the carseat with you from the flight. If your carseat won't fit (check with the airline), get another one just for the flight. I can't stress enough that he should be flying strapped into a carseat.
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Jan 4, 2014 05:17
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Yeah I won't nurse with a cover either. Extra crap to lug around. I'm taking my then 9- month old on a plane in March. He needs to be kept constantly busy so I'm hoping by then he'll have a longer attention span when playing with things. I'm going to pick up the car seat mentioned and buy him his own seat.
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Jan 4, 2014 05:29
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Maybe that makes sense for a domestic flight, but international you are talking about thousands of dollars round trip for buying a seat. Your car seat is gate checked for free and stored securely in the hold, at least with Delta it is, and then you get it back as soon as you land without even going to baggage claim. It's a very convenient service.
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Jan 4, 2014 05:51
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greatn posted:Maybe that makes sense for a domestic flight, but international you are talking about thousands of dollars round trip for buying a seat. You're right, it's just too expensive to keep your child safe. Don't buy a car seat for home either, just drive with your little one on your lap. He's safest directly in front of the air bag.
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Jan 4, 2014 15:56
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Volmarias posted:You're right, it's just too expensive to keep your child safe. Don't buy a car seat for home either, just drive with your little one on your lap. He's safest directly in front of the air bag. Yeah if the plane crashes that car seat is gonna save his life.
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Jan 4, 2014 16:00
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greatn posted:Yeah if the plane crashes that car seat is gonna save his life. For most crashes - landings that didn't happen exactly as intended, takeoffs that didn't go quite right - most people who walked onto the airplane, and sometimes everyone who walked on, can walk back off it. (As far as I know no airplane crash has enabled someone who couldn't walk onto the airplane to walk off it.  ) So having the added protection of a car seat is definitely going to help a baby in a crash, and yes, it might even save his life.Further, there's another source of injury that's not a crash: severe turbulence, especially unexpected, severe turbulence. In those cases the people at most risk are those who are not securely restrained. A nine-month-old can't be securely restrained without a car seat; his parents' and grandparents' arms do not count. Now, you're right that international flights are extremely expensive. It is also true that air travel is certainly safer than travel by car, and that most parents with children too small to sit in their own seats without car seats don't purchase seats for their children, and that nearly all of the time those children are fine. However, I have never been in a car accident where either car was traveling more than about twenty miles an hour, no one in my immediate family has ever been injured in any way in a car accident, and there has never been any moment where my son has been in my car and he wouldn't have been perfectly fine being held by someone in the back seat. I still put him in his car seat for every trip, and I still wear my seatbelt for every trip, and I would do so even if it weren't against the law not to. It isn't against the law to fly with an unrestrained infant (even though I think it should be), but it is a very bad idea. Until it is against the law (if it ever is), it'll be up to each child's parents to decide whether they think the very small odds of something bad happening are small enough for their peace of mind - but they can't make that decision if they think that a car seat would be no use.
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Jan 4, 2014 16:49
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I was not intending to start a war on the merits of kids and planes. We will probably get a seat for the trip and I will look closer at the ones mentioned. I am not thrilled about taking our kid on the trip, but it is not really something that I can change. We are also looking at the Osprey Baby backpack carrier for the trip and also use around the US and our home turf. My wife and I are big hikers and backpackers so being able to take him with us would be nice.
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Jan 4, 2014 18:18
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Mercury Ballistic posted:
We tried the Osprey and didn't like it. We have a Deuter and we really like it. Our son seems really comfortable in it and enjoys being up so high.
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Jan 4, 2014 19:01
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An airplane is probably safer than one's own house in terms of how likely a baby is to be injured. Comparing using an infant in arms ticket to putting a child in your lap in the car is quite frankly offensive.
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Jan 4, 2014 20:36
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greatn posted:An airplane is probably safer than one's own house in terms of how likely a baby is to be injured. Comparing using an infant in arms ticket to putting a child in your lap in the car is quite frankly offensive. I'm not going to say one way or the other about buying a seat or not, but clear air turbulence does happen (turbulence the pilots cannot foresee) and people, adults and children booth, have died from hitting turbulence, not being buckled in, and getting tossed about. That's why they always say even if the seat belt light is off if you are in your seat buckle yourself in. Yes, it rarely happens but it does happen and it only takes a fee seconds of dropping/violent shaking to cause harm.
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Jan 4, 2014 21:41
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I looked it up and about 60 people per year are injured by turbulence in the United States, out of about 800 million passengers. You're literally much more likely to be struck by lightning in a given year. That said, the FAA does recommend child safety harnesses. Further hashing those numbers out, if you took an infant in arms on a flight every month for two years(the max amount of time they can be infant in arms), during the entire time period there would be a roughly two in a million chance of them sustaining injury from turbulence. greatn fucked around with this message at 00:17 on Jan 5, 2014 |
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Jan 4, 2014 22:23
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