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Ben Davis posted:Front bottom is hilariously bad! I agree, although I've heard much worse. "Secret tummy", for example. I'm generally resistant to cutesy/twee terms too. A friend of mine still sometimes uses "tooty" (the "oo" pronounced short like in "would"). It makes me want to vomit on her. She's in her 50s. "Privates" works well, actually. Can't believe that one didn't occur to me before.
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Jan 17, 2014 15:16
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Penis, balls, and butt crack are the words we use. Made up "cutesy" poo poo is terrible. You want your kid to be able to tell you if something's wrong down there and the more specific, the better.
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Jan 17, 2014 15:18
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Privates was specifically for the vaginal area and dupa was for the butt cause my mom's side is pretty Polish. For some reason my brother called his penis his peanut. It might be because he couldn't say penis when he was little and it just stuck until he was an older kid.
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Jan 17, 2014 15:23
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We use vagina (or bagina, if you're her). It helps us when she has a rash; she can tell us more precisely what is sore. We're all over the map on her rear; they use bottom at school, so we've had bottom, keister, and kesiterbottom. I also grew up with tuchus and dupa, but I just like the way keister sounds. Also, it's contextual; she moves her keister when she's in the way, but she wipes her bottom. Grandma tells me she once proudly announced that she needed to wipe her rear end, so we've cut back on that.
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Jan 17, 2014 17:39
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I had a very thick seven month beard, basically no shaving since my son was born. I shaved it off and I feel like now he doesn't recognize me any more, and gets upset whenever I'm hanging out with him by myself.
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Jan 17, 2014 19:21
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greatn posted:I had a very thick seven month beard, basically no shaving since my son was born. I shaved it off and I feel like now he doesn't recognize me any more, and gets upset whenever I'm hanging out with him by myself. He'll get used to it, it will just take some time. I remember I was 6 or so when the military changed the facial hair standards while my dad was at sea. He left with the big old bushy beard he always had, returned 4 months later clean shaven. At first I was *terrified* of this strange pod person claiming to be my father. It took me a little while, but I got over it. Also, we call my son's parts his penis and scrotum, with balls and testicles interchangeably used for the contents of said scrotum. When talking in a very general sense, we call it a crotch. Girls have vulvas and vaginas. Women have breasts. Everyone has nipples and a butt.
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Jan 17, 2014 20:55
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I'm not really sure what I'll call my baby girl's crotch yet either, I don't want to use some cutesy term though. I can't say I want to teach her the accurate term then call it a vagina though because that wouldn't be the correct word, even though it's what I usually call my own. Vulva is most accurate but almost no one uses it, no one I know in real life.
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Jan 18, 2014 02:08
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greatn posted:I had a very thick seven month beard, basically no shaving since my son was born. I shaved it off and I feel like now he doesn't recognize me any more, and gets upset whenever I'm hanging out with him by myself. I'm so worried this is what's going to happen when my husband shaves his beard. He's been growing since since just before I got pregnant and my son is now 6 months old, so it's a pretty impressive beard. But I'm getting kind of tired of it, and he's tired of losing chunks of beard to Boos little grasping hands. On the other hand, I love the happy face Boo gets when he looks at daddy. It's just so cute, and I don't want him to look confused and sad. Which is why I'm trying to get my husband to shave it off sooner rather than later. I figure that the younger Boo is when the change happens, the faster he'll get over.
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Jan 18, 2014 04:41
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Maybe he should just trim it to a more manageable length thats still recognizable but not so yankable.
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Jan 18, 2014 04:44
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You could always get him to do a little bit at a time. Trim it shorter and shorter, turn it into a van dyke and then a goatee, etc etc.
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Jan 18, 2014 04:44
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The solution I've heard from a friend who did it is to shave in front of the kid, so that they know that swarthy dad and smooth dad are the same person. I ended up shaving one night with a decent enough beard, and Alex didn't seem to notice or care at all, so it's not a sure thing that a shave will cause problems.
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Jan 18, 2014 05:52
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When I shaved my (fairly full) beard full off, our daughter did a double-take when she first saw me, but she figured it out fast enough. In terms of terms, I was on the train for calling things what they are (penis, vagina), though my wife has for the moment generalized to "private parts", and the kid picks up her language more than mine. Once the kid is a little older (right now, 19 months), I'll start wanting to swing to calling them by actual names. Probably around the same time she finally picks up a curse word. As for the butt, we just call it "butt".  Apparently some people think that's a bad word or whatever, but to us, it's just what that part of the body is called.
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Jan 18, 2014 18:00
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Axiem posted:As for the butt, we just call it "butt". When I was little I was always minded to use the British equivalent, "bum", along with "willy" for my pork sword. I remember being encouraged to use "bottom" and "penis" by my mum, though. I don't really have a problem with those terms, though Amelia uses "bottom" at the moment. I think we might just use "privates" for her girl bits and then move to more specific terms as she gets older.
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Jan 18, 2014 19:52
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Well the beard thing may be changing soon. My husband aunt passed away after a prolonged illness, and she requested that my husband be a pallbearer but that he trim his beard first. So it probably won't go away completely, but will be shorter. Also my little man is now 6 months old! He's so roly poly, and really starting to try to crawl. He can do the army squiggle thing, and can pull himself around in circles. When I lay him down in the crib, he immediately rolls over onto his side and a few minutes later onto his tummy and he sleeps on his tummy the rest of the night. I shouldn't worry right? I know that his risk of SIDS is declining, but I start worrying at night and have to go into his room to check that he's breathing. I thought I was past that phase. 
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Jan 19, 2014 02:49
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travelsized posted:I shouldn't worry right? I know that his risk of SIDS is declining, but I start worrying at night and have to go into his room to check that he's breathing. I thought I was past that phase. You are never past that phase. My kids are 3 and 1, and I check that they are breathing when I check on them at night before going to bed myself. If they sleep particularly longer than usual, I worry that something has happened in their sleep and I might check on them. My kids always slept on their belly after they learned to roll, I think that's just how things end up.
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Jan 19, 2014 03:22
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I have posted before about my issues trying to decide whether to send our children to daycare, and me return to work, versus me continuing to stay at home with the kids, perhaps picking up a part-time job at Home Depot or the like. I want to write about my personal perspective and how it has played out in my family. This is fairly long but anyone who's going through something similar might appreciate it. I certainly appreciate hearing about similar stories from others in the same situation. My wife earned considerably more than me when we had our first child. We interviewed a dozen or more daycare providers and ultimately decided I would stay home with our daughter. We would have a second child very quickly after the first, to take advantage of the situation. Until Oct. 2013, I had been a stay at home dad for about 37 months. We have 2 kids, 3 1/2 and about 2 1/4 in age. I had been their sole childcare for their entire lives until few months ago. Sure, grandmas/aunts/etc would watch them from time to time, but 95%+ of the time it was me. This worked out really well for both the kids and me and my wife. However, as our son got older, the two of our children combined got to be too much for me. I simply don't have the patience to watch two toddlers 5 days per week, 9+ hours per day. So, we started looking at what it would take for me to get back into the workforce. I buffed up my resume, filled it in with my part-time side-business that I made appear full-time, and submitted it like crazy. I got more than a handful of interviews and a few job offers. Eventually, I took one and have been there for 3+ months now. This also means that late last August, we put our kids into a childcare center 2 days per week, which has now become 3 days per week. My mother comes to our house and watches them the other 2 days per week. The point of this post sort of starts from here forward, but I needed to give some background information for it to make sense. I still have the pictures I took of both of our kids the first day that we dropped them off at daycare. Neither of them cried, but neither of them seemed enthused about being there. Subsequent days, one or both of them would cry pretty severely at drop off, and at pick up. This continued for 2 months or so. It appeared to be particularly hard on our (younger) son. He really hated drop off. I mention the pictures, because at the time we took them, we just thought our kids looked a little uneasy, being in a new environment and not knowing anybody. However, as I look back at the pictures now, it tears me apart not to recognize sooner that they were scared and simply didn't know that we were leaving them all day. More than once, we were just about to pull them out of daycare and have me quit my job to start watching them full-time again. Then, something would happen like we would get an unsolicited note from one of their teachers about something remarkable that one of our kids had done. So we'd give it another day/week. This carried on for quite a while. Meanwhile, I had surprisingly started to like my job and the people I work with. I am literally engaged in my work for 8+ hours per day (and get paid for over-time). The time flies during the day. However, I have a very far commute and we had several blizzard-like snowfalls during this same time. All of this contributed to me wanting to quit and watch our kids again. We kept going, however. Eventually, the crying at drop-off stopped. The kids started to tell us more and more about what they had done at school. They started singing songs that we had never played for them before. They started using crayons and markers with proficiency. They were clearly gaining important skills, socially as well. This reaffirmed to us that we should keep them in daycare, so I kept working. But, just to throw another wrench at us, the sicknesses started. Since our kids started daycare/pre-school last August, there has probably been 14 days accumulated time that one or both of them has been healthy. There is ALWAYS a cold at our house. If not a cold, then it's the flu. If it isn't the flu, it's pink-eye, which they have now each had; never before. Also our daughter got pneumonia and our son got bronchitis. My wife also got pneumonia and I got bronchitis. Our kids got sick first and gave it to us, so they obviously got it from someone at their school. We have had, on average, something like 1 visit to the doctor's office per 2 weeks. The week when they had pneumonia/bronchitis (yes, it was the same week), I personally brought one/both of them to urgent care 4 times - my wife brought them 2 more times. This was the worst time and, honestly, we probably should have said, "gently caress IT, we're done with this poo poo, I quit, our kids are sick 100% of the time, this has to stop." For whatever reason, we didn't. I kept working, the kids eventually got healthy (only to get more colds/etc after), and here we are. So where we're at now: I intend to keep working and make a solid career out of this. By chance, I sort of fell into a really good field for me, that pays well and leads to incredibly cushy jobs after a few years. Since I have started, I have already received a $4/hr raise and there appears to be more on the horizon. What this ultimately means is that we intend to keep our kids in daycare/preschool for now. They seem to be enjoying themselves and learning a LOT. It's amazing to us how many different songs our daughter sings when she gets home. She can now count to 20 in Spanish at 3 years old. Our son seems to be the most popular kid in his group. He is always sitting right in the front and the other kids just gravitate to him. Still, not a day goes by that I don't reminisce about being home with the kids - watching them interact with our dog, or fight over some stupid toy, or going for a walk and looking at frogs/ducks/etc. Everyone who's a parent knows what I'm talking about. Sure, socialization is excellent for children. But we could accomplish this with a part-time preschool and with playgroups. Honestly, we would have, if we had been better-informed about PT-preschools before I started working. I keep reminding myself that our savings accounts are growing at never-before-seen rates and this should lead to better futures for all of us. Otherwise I can't justify it. Kids are only pre-K-to-12 aged once, and they are changing the fastest now. But I have had a long time with them, and having extra money is always a good thing?
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Jan 19, 2014 06:43
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My six-month-old daughter hates riding in the car and often cries the whole time. Showing her videos on my phone usually calms her down and occasionally even puts her to sleep, but showing babies videos is supposed to be bad for their development. Is it better to show her the videos or let her cry? (Another solution we've discovered is tapping her mouth so that the crying sounds like wub-wub-wub, which doesn't seem to make any difference to her but is hilarious to us.)
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Jan 19, 2014 17:26
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Seven for a Secret posted:My six-month-old daughter hates riding in the car and often cries the whole time. Showing her videos on my phone usually calms her down and occasionally even puts her to sleep, but showing babies videos is supposed to be bad for their development. Is it better to show her the videos or let her cry? (Another solution we've discovered is tapping her mouth so that the crying sounds like wub-wub-wub, which doesn't seem to make any difference to her but is hilarious to us.) If showing her videos calms her down by all means do it. I think the screen time = bad is based on reasoning that screen time can replace play time for babies and playing and interacting is what contributes to their development. Obviously you can't be working on tummy time in the car so if showing her videos keeps her from stressing then I'd do it and not worry about it. We are taking my not good in the car son on a plane in March and I'm going to have an large variety of videos ready. 
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Jan 19, 2014 18:32
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Seven for a Secret posted:(Another solution we've discovered is tapping her mouth so that the crying sounds like wub-wub-wub, which doesn't seem to make any difference to her but is hilarious to us.) I've found that rapidly (but relatively gently) squeezing the side of a toddler who is wailing causes a (very amusing) vibrato. Even when she's not crying, I can start doing that and she'll go "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa" since she thinks that it's funny too. Related: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aEjKk5Kt3rs (skip to 2:04)
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Jan 19, 2014 19:18
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Seven for a Secret posted:My six-month-old daughter hates riding in the car and often cries the whole time. Showing her videos on my phone usually calms her down and occasionally even puts her to sleep, but showing babies videos is supposed to be bad for their development. Is it better to show her the videos or let her cry? (Another solution we've discovered is tapping her mouth so that the crying sounds like wub-wub-wub, which doesn't seem to make any difference to her but is hilarious to us.) I see lots of parents with rear facing car seats who have their kids in the car with sunlight directly blaring on their faces. I see it too with front facing car seats, but by then the kid is a bit older and can move out of the way better. Could it be that your daughter hates it because she has the sun blaring right in her eyes? I would hate it fiercely if I was strapped into a tiny car seat without being able to move and then having the sun right on my face. Even if not, get tinted windows in the rear to give her some protection from the heat/light.
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Jan 19, 2014 20:03
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We have sun shades and a mirror so we can monitor him/sun in the face/etc. He just hates being confined to the car seat for longer then 10-15 minutes at a time.
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Jan 19, 2014 20:42
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Volmarias posted:I've found that rapidly (but relatively gently) squeezing the side of a toddler who is wailing causes a (very amusing) vibrato. Even when she's not crying, I can start doing that and she'll go "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa" since she thinks that it's funny too. Ahaha I do this too! My guy just turned 7 months and he rarely cries, but he can get whiny, so when he gets going I'll squeeze him gently and it turns the whine to laughs when he goes "aaAAaaAAaaAAaaAAaaAA". His club, I mean, cast*, is coming off tomorrow THANK GOD. He's been beating me with it the past 2 weeks. He's also discovered pinching, so when I'm done nursing him I look like I've been attacked by bees. But in cuter new learned things, he does this wicked fast trill with his tongue, like for the Spanish R but he can't make R sounds, so he'll go EHHHHHHNNNNNNNNN or DDDDDDDDDDD while trilling and it sounds like a tiny motorcycle or goat. All. Day. Long. "NNNNNNNnnnnnnnnn! DDddddddddd!" *I posted about my parenting fail of him falling off a chair and buckle fracturing his wrist a couple weeks ago.
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Jan 19, 2014 20:48
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If you personally don't want to play the videos in the car, you can try to find the soundtrack to whatever you're playing and put that in the cd player. That works well for us--Signing Time cds and the Winnie the Pooh songs get a lot of playtime in our car.
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Jan 19, 2014 20:53
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I thought of a concise way to summarize my feelings on my returning to work versus if I had continued to stay at home with our kids: Is the extra money worth giving up the only time in their lives that we could have full-time, one-on-one (well, two of them and me, so two-on-one) time together? Granted my work schedule is fairly flexible and I can usually pick them up from daycare before 4pm, and could pick them up earlier if I started earlier.
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Jan 19, 2014 21:26
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For those of you that aren't aware: There's a facebook group that sprung out of this thread and the pregnancy thread. The group is pretty active. HOWEVER after Facebook implemented the "suggested groups" feature, we've been swamped with spam accounts requesting to join, as well as clueless people who have no idea what Something Awful is  We made the group secret, but we still want goons to be able to find it! So we made this group that is easily findable. So if anyone wants in, just join that one, and we'll add you to the real group. Didn't want it to be so drat convoluted, but Facebook is ridiculous sometimes. Here's a picture of my daughter being mad wearing a Santa hat:  EDIT: You can also post your email-address here or pm it to me, and we'll add you directly! Thanks! bilabial trill fucked around with this message at 22:51 on Jan 19, 2014 |
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Jan 19, 2014 22:13
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Poor baby just wants to be able to post about farts and babies in peace 
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Jan 19, 2014 22:32
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Hey - future member of this thread in about two months. Just put in a request to the closed group so I could get into the secret cool kid group.
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Jan 19, 2014 22:54
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I just joined too!
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Jan 20, 2014 00:14
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Learn from my mistakes, fellow goon Dads! If you let your 2-year old into the shower with you, they WILL find the long-handled scrub brush and then, when you're rinsing off the shampoo, whack you in the dong like they're trying to bust open a piñata.
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Jan 20, 2014 00:14
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I just joined as well! Also TheDeviousOne, this is a question my husband and I will be asking ourselves in a year or so. Mr.Actual Sized is currently the stay at home parent, but we've talked in the past about putting little Boo in part time day care. Mr. Actual does some freelance type stuff and can work part time, but right now has to do any of his work on weekends and evenings.
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Jan 20, 2014 04:14
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I'm having my first real freakout. I need help coming back from the brink. Background: my wife and I are adopting a baby in June so on top of all the "get ready for being a parent" stuff, we're also doing a ton of private adoption work. I have no idea how we're going to afford childcare. I'm sure we'll figure it out but sweet jesus is it expensive. We both work and, while I haven't done the exact numbers yet, one of us staying home isn't really an option. I know things will be ok but I'm still saying hello from the bottom of the roller coaster.
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Jan 21, 2014 20:56
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Thwomp posted:I'm having my first real freakout. I need help coming back from the brink. Childcare is unbelievably expensive. I was making $38k/year when we had our first child, 3+ years ago. At that time, we were mostly looking at in-home daycare rather than daycare centers. After taxes and commuting costs and daycare costs, I would have been taking home less than $5 per hour worked. Sure some of that could have been written off at the end of the year taxes, but that doesn't do much good day-to-day. Ultimately I ended up quitting and working part-time, while providing childcare. I did seasonal window cleaning and took home the same or more as if I had been working and paying someone else to watch our daughter. Sure maybe one of you cannot outright quit work to watch your new child, but perhaps one of you could work part time in the evenings/weekends. Working simply to pay for daycare sucks bigtime.
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Jan 21, 2014 21:15
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Thwomp posted:I'm having my first real freakout. I need help coming back from the brink. I make the exact same money moonlighting 7 hours a week doing catch-up at what used to be my FT job as I would if we were paying for both kids to go to childcare. As in, 7 hours a week free and clear while my neighbor watches the kids nets me the same as 40 hours a week while the kids are in full time care/after care at school. Seriously. And I grossed $50K a year working FT. So, I recommend doing the exact numbers. If you are working to pay for childcare with nothing left over but pocket change, you have to evaluate whether one of you staying home isn't an option after all. (Not that there's anything wrong with working to stay happy, if that's what you need. But from a fiscal standpoint, I couldn't make that choice.) But you will find a way to work it out. We all do.
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Jan 21, 2014 22:58
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TheDeviousOne posted:Since our kids started daycare/pre-school last August, there has probably been 14 days accumulated time that one or both of them has been healthy. There is ALWAYS a cold at our house. If not a cold, then it's the flu. If it isn't the flu, it's pink-eye, which they have now each had; never before. Also our daughter got pneumonia and our son got bronchitis. My wife also got pneumonia and I got bronchitis. Our kids got sick first and gave it to us, so they obviously got it from someone at their school. We have had, on average, something like 1 visit to the doctor's office per 2 weeks. The week when they had pneumonia/bronchitis (yes, it was the same week), I personally brought one/both of them to urgent care 4 times - my wife brought them 2 more times. This was the worst time and, honestly, we probably should have said, "gently caress IT, we're done with this poo poo, I quit, our kids are sick 100% of the time, this has to stop." For whatever reason, we didn't. I kept working, the kids eventually got healthy (only to get more colds/etc after), and here we are. You've brought this up before, but I want to reiterate, there is no way around this. If they don't build their immune systems now, it'll happen when they start school. This is what kids do. They get sick. They get better. They build up an immune system. It's not as bad for us adults as we don't go to our co-workers cube and put their pens and staplers and dirty coffee cups in our mouth and catch all their germs, but it's a part of life. We recently had 4 month stretch with neither kid being sick. It was amazing. Then they both got Strep. Oldest got Strep Throat, youngest got Strep rear end. Antibiotics were given, poo poo was literally everywhere, many loads of laundry were done and many baths given. It happens. They get sick, they get better. You can't wrap them in a disinfected bubble for their entire life. I only bring this up again because to me it seems like you're trying to demonize child care facilities as dirty cesspools of disease and filth. The world is a dirty place. You took your kids out of a very small ecosystem and they became exposed over the last 5 months to an onslaught of new germs. I would expect nothing less than them being sick very often as they work through everything new they're being exposed to.
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Jan 22, 2014 00:38
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Speaking of daycare germs. It was so much fun that Jasper decided to practice kissing (open mouth face licking is more accurate) after picking up some sort of cold from daycare.
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Jan 22, 2014 01:10
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skipdogg posted:You've brought this up before, but I want to reiterate, there is no way around this. If they don't build their immune systems now, it'll happen when they start school. This is what kids do. They get sick. They get better. They build up an immune system. It's not as bad for us adults as we don't go to our co-workers cube and put their pens and staplers and dirty coffee cups in our mouth and catch all their germs, but it's a part of life. We recently had 4 month stretch with neither kid being sick. It was amazing. Then they both got Strep. Oldest got Strep Throat, youngest got Strep rear end. Antibiotics were given, poo poo was literally everywhere, many loads of laundry were done and many baths given. It happens. They get sick, they get better. You can't wrap them in a disinfected bubble for their entire life. My son got a horrible chest cold after playing at the playground over the weekend so I decided he's never going to a park again. We're going to avoid libraries, museums, and restaurants as well just to be safe.
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Jan 22, 2014 01:47
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skipdogg posted:You've brought this up before, but I want to reiterate, there is no way around this. If they don't build their immune systems now, it'll happen when they start school. This is what kids do. They get sick. They get better. They build up an immune system. It's not as bad for us adults as we don't go to our co-workers cube and put their pens and staplers and dirty coffee cups in our mouth and catch all their germs, but it's a part of life. We recently had 4 month stretch with neither kid being sick. It was amazing. Then they both got Strep. Oldest got Strep Throat, youngest got Strep rear end. Antibiotics were given, poo poo was literally everywhere, many loads of laundry were done and many baths given. It happens. They get sick, they get better. You can't wrap them in a disinfected bubble for their entire life. Yea, I understand this. The problem I am having with it is that, like the poster above you mentioned, I could still be moonlighting in the evenings/weekends and netting the same amount of money as working 40+ hours while paying for childcare. I am seeing that preschool is beneficial, it's just really hard to separate that out from seeing your kids constantly sick.
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Jan 22, 2014 03:48
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You have said you like your job, want to make a career out of it, and that you don't have the patience to put up with two toddlers every day...so it seems like you answered your own question. Yeah, it sucks that they are sick all the time but would you rather have them be sick now or be sick when they would have to miss time from 'real' school?
sheri fucked around with this message at 16:23 on Jan 22, 2014 |
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Jan 22, 2014 04:25
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sheri posted:Yeah, it sucks that they are sick all the time but would you feather have them be sick now or be sick when they would have to miss time from 'real' school? This is a pretty valid point. I was never in a daycare or preschool as an infant. When I started primary school I was constantly getting sick, if there was a bug going around it was a sure thing that I'd be catching it. I can't help but wonder whether if I was socialised a bit more as a little tyke it would have given me a stronger constitution.
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Jan 22, 2014 11:55
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My wife and son were skyping with his grandma last night, which they do on the floor, when suddenly he grabbed my wife's head and pulled himself to standing. He has crazy powerful legs but I wasn't expecting him to stand this quickly! (seven months). Any good recommendations for standing toys he can practice his balance on?
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Jan 22, 2014 15:03
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