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KozmoNaut posted:Imagine this think charging straight at you, hissing a spitting and ready to gently caress you the gently caress up: They've also got delicate, hollow bones and a long, easily grabbable neck. You're a primate who probably outweighs them by at least 1:5, most of that weight made up in dense muscle and heavy bone with highly developed and powerful grasping and pulling limbs. The swan is all bluster.
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Mar 24, 2014 14:23
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LeJackal posted:They've also got delicate, hollow bones and a long, easily grabbable neck. You're a primate who probably outweighs them by at least 1:5, most of that weight made up in dense muscle and heavy bone with highly developed and powerful grasping and pulling limbs.
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Mar 24, 2014 14:34
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LeJackal posted:They've also got delicate, hollow bones and a long, easily grabbable neck. You're a primate who probably outweighs them by at least 1:5, most of that weight made up in dense muscle and heavy bone with highly developed and powerful grasping and pulling limbs. :Insert fat goon joke here:
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Mar 24, 2014 14:43
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hopterque posted:Clearly this guy is a bird fighting expert, we know who to turn to when the cassowaries take over the world. Cassowaries have a five-inch long talon on their giant, powerful feet and weigh nearly as much as we do. I'd suggest we ramp up our rear end-kicking game by bringing in our social skills (group tactics, highly sophisticated vocal communication) and tool using capabilities (pointy sticks, rocks, either hurled at high velocity) for those guys. Most critters have a hard time coping with troops of highly organized and well armed primates, just ask the sea mink. Or the eastern elk. Or the bluebuck. Or the atlas bear. Or the barbary lion. Or the honshu wolf. Or the formosan clouded leopard. Or the cape lion. Or the Caspian tiger. Oh wait, you can't ask them anything. On account of them all being killed by a certain highly social tool-using bipedal ape.  Edit: Solice Kirsk posted::Insert fat goon joke here: A 300-pound fatty goon falling on 33-pound hollow-boned swan will end with a dead swan. LeJackal has a new favorite as of 15:31 on Mar 24, 2014 |
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Mar 24, 2014 15:06
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More QEII: She was also an accomplished rider back in her day. And still is. 
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Mar 24, 2014 15:42
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Blistex posted:More QEII: She was also an accomplished rider back in her day.
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Mar 24, 2014 15:55
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LeJackal posted:just ask the sea mink. Or the eastern elk. Or the bluebuck. Or the atlas bear. Or the barbary lion. Or the honshu wolf. Or the formosan clouded leopard. Or the cape lion. Or the Caspian tiger. Or the Emu! Oh, wait...   Major G.P.W. Meredith posted:If we had a military division with the bullet-carrying capacity of these birds it would face any army in the world...They can face machine guns with the invulnerability of tanks. They are like Zulus whom even dum-dum bullets could not stop. Not even a machinegun allowed an army to equalize the capacity of violence so they were on par with an emu and its talons.
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Mar 24, 2014 16:16
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Edminster posted:Not even a machinegun allowed an army to equalize the capacity of violence so they were on par with an emu and its talons. On the other hand if they'd just stopped shooting and started whistling really loudly the emus would have all run round and round in a giant circle, bobbing up and down and looking really confused. They're not the smartest of animals.
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Mar 24, 2014 16:20
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In a similar vein, the first thing to kill me in FarCry 3 was a cassowary. Those fuckers are no joke
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Mar 24, 2014 16:23
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pigdog posted:Riding that sort of lady saddle must suck , how do you even keep balance on that thing? Kegel exercises.
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Mar 24, 2014 17:49
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Solice Kirsk posted:Kegel exercises. and a strategically placed riding pommel.
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Mar 24, 2014 18:10
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TheBigAristotle posted:In a similar vein, the first thing to kill me in FarCry 3 was a cassowary. Those fuckers are no joke Just wait until you play FarCry 3: Blood Dragon and encounter cyborg Cassowaries.
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Mar 24, 2014 18:13
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LeJackal posted:They've also got delicate, hollow bones and a long, easily grabbable neck. You're a primate who probably outweighs them by at least 1:5, most of that weight made up in dense muscle and heavy bone with highly developed and powerful grasping and pulling limbs. The swan doesn't have to be stronger as long as it wants to protect it's eggs more than you want to eat them. Kind of like that goat that terrorized a town.
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Mar 24, 2014 19:50
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If you encounter one of these angry fuckers on the golf course you play around.  They are fearless and the hissing and clicking noises they make will rattle your soul. 
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Mar 24, 2014 22:17
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DrBouvenstein posted:Just wait until you play FarCry 3: Blood Dragon and encounter cyborg Cassowaries. 
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Mar 24, 2014 22:35
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JoelJoel posted:If you encounter one of these angry fuckers on the golf course you play around. It's because they're protected. If it were legal to kill geese, no goose in the world would go after someone wielding a 5-iron. Animals *know*. I was out deer hunting once year, sitting down on a fallen tree, and I heard movement in the leaves behind me. I slowly turned around, and there was this fat doe walking towards me. She knew I was there, she made eye contact with me, and I knew exactly what she was thinking: "You have no antlerless stamp on your license, you can't shoot me, so get hosed and watch me forage." If I'd bought a doe stamp that year, no way she'd have acted that way. Remove Canada geese from the Migratory Bird Act's protection, make it so that it's not illegal to club them to death with a sand wedge, and they'd surrender the "Terror of the Golf Course" title to the alligators in the water hazards.
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Mar 24, 2014 22:38
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Phanatic posted:It's because they're protected. If it were legal to kill geese, no goose in the world would go after someone wielding a 5-iron. Thank you for this. I was unaware that Canada Geese consider Canadian Law when deciding how to protect their territory.
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Mar 24, 2014 22:49
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Yeah, um, it's one thing to believe that since the animals know from experience that acting aggressively towards humans does not result in the humans killing them, they have become more willing to display aggression towards humans - I think that's perfectly reasonable to expect - and quite another to think that a deer psychically understood the precise type of hunting license you purchased
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Mar 24, 2014 23:09
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That would be because Phanatic is engaging in what people often refer to as a 'joke,' or 'hyperbole,' for rhetorical effect.
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Mar 24, 2014 23:11
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Strudel Man posted:That would be because Phanatic is engaging in what people often refer to as a 'joke,' or 'hyperbole,' for rhetorical effect. Jokes? Not on MY internet!
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Mar 24, 2014 23:19
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Just because geese are protected under the law, does not mean that they are above the law. 
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Mar 24, 2014 23:44
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 We'll miss you Dave.
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Mar 25, 2014 00:02
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Poor Dave Mitchell 
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Mar 25, 2014 00:22
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Wilford Cutlery posted:Poor Dave Mitchell That's always so loving funny. Every single time.
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Mar 25, 2014 00:27
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Ariza posted:That's always so loving funny. Every single time. Sweet, we finally got the official stamp of approval. Go hog wild, everyone!
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Mar 25, 2014 00:28
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InediblePenguin posted:Yeah, um, it's one thing to believe that since the animals know from experience that acting aggressively towards humans does not result in the humans killing them, they have become more willing to display aggression towards humans - I think that's perfectly reasonable to expect - and quite another to think that a deer psychically understood the precise type of hunting license you purchased Pretty much, we get them migrating to UK in Autumn/Winter, they are not aggressive at all over here, mind I see them while cycling on canals and small water parks, unless it's a totally different goose
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Mar 25, 2014 00:31
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I haven't seen this posted. By far one of the coolest images I have saved. Not so cool? Here's another angle.  Gotta love BUFFs going below a flight deck.
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Mar 25, 2014 00:34
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InediblePenguin posted:I think that's perfectly reasonable to expect - and quite another to think that a deer psychically understood the precise type of hunting license you purchased Things deer know... 1. What manner of license you have (doe, fawn, buck). 2. The opening and closing days of each type of hunting season (rifle, bow, black powder). 3. The exact distance to stand next to a road so they cannot be shot at (300m) 4. When you've just packed up your rifle/bow. 5. How to stand directly between you and you buddy's deer-blind/stand.
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Mar 25, 2014 00:53
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Spaced God posted:I haven't seen this posted. By far one of the coolest images I have saved. That is pretty awesome. Also reminds me of the crazy experiment in the 1960s, evaluating the C-130 for cargo delivery to aircraft carriers.  End result: you can do it, but probably not the best idea. They replaced it with a new plane half the size. But pretty badass accomplishment for the pilots that made a couple dozen landings that way. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ar-poc38C84
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Mar 25, 2014 01:07
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The illegal killing and eating of annoying geese is becoming pretty common among people I know. They seem to really like to go after little kids and even the most hippyish of farmers isn't going to let that stand. Same thing with deer, which are so bad in places around here that they use loving swat snipers to thin out populations. Maryland needs to either rework it's game laws or start importing wolves and coyotes.
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Mar 25, 2014 01:45
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pigdog posted:Riding that sort of lady saddle must suck , how do you even keep balance on that thing? It is extremely hard and requires a surprising amount of strength. I knew a girl who rode that way and she tried to show me because I was curious and I couldn't manage it. Speaking of horses. 
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Mar 25, 2014 02:48
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Mar 25, 2014 02:52
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JoelJoel posted:Thank you for this. I was unaware that Canada Geese consider Canadian Law when deciding how to protect their territory. After protecting their territory, they usually come over and apologize too.
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Mar 25, 2014 03:36
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Mar 25, 2014 09:13
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Salties are literal dinosaurs.
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Mar 25, 2014 09:42
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Welcome to Australia.
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Mar 25, 2014 10:43
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Ignimbrite posted:Salties are literal dinosaurs. They would be insulted to be called dinosaurs. They're much older then those posers.
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Mar 25, 2014 14:06
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Ignimbrite posted:Salties are literal dinosaurs. Don't literal dinosaurs have their legs straight under their bodies?
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Mar 25, 2014 17:25
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newreply.php posted:Don't literal dinosaurs have their legs straight under their bodies? Chickadees are literal dinosaurs.
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Mar 25, 2014 20:09
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Vultures, man. Vultures are literal dinosaurs.
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Mar 25, 2014 20:21
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