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Josuke Higashikata
Mar 7, 2013


Detroit_Dogg posted:

"I'm proud to announce that Brody the Bear is our new UFC Heavyweight Bear Champion and he will be defending it against military veteran Wojtek at the Honda Center next month" -Dana White

Smokey would easily beat Brody but he can't cut to 135 and he has :ortiz: as his manager.

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Intel&Sebastian
Oct 20, 2002

colonel...
i'm trying to sneak around
but i'm dummy thicc
and the clap of my ass cheeks
keeps alerting the guards!
Man Tito's been signing bears left and right ever since he put his twig and berries on the internet.

Google Butt
Oct 4, 2005

Xenology is an unnatural mixture of science fiction and formal logic. At its core is a flawed assumption...

that an alien race would be psychologically human.

Intel&Sebastian posted:

Man Tito's been signing bears left and right ever since he put his twig and berries on the internet.

i'm sorry, what photo are you referring to?

Grandmaster.flv
Jun 24, 2011
There are no unified rules for mma that says bears cannot fight.

Air Bear

MassRafTer
May 26, 2001

BAEST MODE!!!
If the Destroyer can wrestle a bear, our future LW champion can.

Bulky Bartokomous
Nov 3, 2006

In Mypos, only the strong survive.

The Maroon Ninja posted:

In other news:

Khabib Nurmagomedov confirms that he is the boy in the video of a nine-year-old wrestling a bear

Dagestan posted:
"Yes, I was. It was a secret video and I do not know how that got on the internet." Nurmagomedov told Combate.com via a translator. "That was long ago, I almost do not remember, I was a boy at the time."

Video inside for those who haven't seen it.

Edit: related: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4dQKo6m2PB4

How much crazy poo poo happened in your childhood if you almost don't remember the time you wrestled a bear?

Detroit_Dogg
Feb 2, 2008
Aaron Rodgers is gay and lame and oh please cum in me Aaron PLEASE I NEED IT OH STAFFORD YOUR COCK IS NOT WORTHY ONLY THE GAYEST RODGERS PRICK CAN SATISFY MY DESPERATE THROAT

Dantu posted:

How much crazy poo poo happened in your childhood if you almost don't remember the time you wrestled a bear?

Dagestan.

Novum
May 26, 2012

That's how we roll
I remember one of the Dagi fighters had a little quote about how he wasn't nervous to get in a cage and fight because he'd spent 7 years in a tent getting shot at by helicopters or something. It was pretty gnarly.

-Atom-
Sep 13, 2003

Contrarian Dick

Bad At Everything

Novum posted:

I remember one of the Dagi fighters had a little quote about how he wasn't nervous to get in a cage and fight because he'd spent 7 years in a tent getting shot at by helicopters or something. It was pretty gnarly.

Dagestan fighters have the coolest quotes. After Hobby Lobby's debut, he was interviewed and said "It's my job to throw him, where he lands is his business." Also Nurmy's "If Sambo Were Easy It Would be Called Jiu-Jitsu" shirt.

Basically I'm moving to Dagestan.

MagicCube
May 25, 2004

Novum posted:

I remember one of the Dagi fighters had a little quote about how he wasn't nervous to get in a cage and fight because he'd spent 7 years in a tent getting shot at by helicopters or something. It was pretty gnarly.

I remember that too. It was Adlan Amagov who said "I lived in a tent for seven years with Russians shooting at us from helicopters. In the cage, it’s just a man." Then he proceeded to KO TJ Waldburger so bad he needed oxygen.

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdDxW15x6fw

gunblade
Sep 1, 2008

-Just lucky, I guess
Dagestani quote incoming: After UFC 167 Ali Baugatinov was asked by a russian reporter why he, the 'Puncher king', didn't knock out his opponent. Many figthers would probably have soured and refused to respond to such a question, but Baugatinov responded wittily by saying that he had wanted to show off for his childhood idol Arnold Schwarzenegger, who was in the crowd. "As a kid I spent a lot of time watching his films, and so I thought that it might be his time to watch me for a bit."

At 36:00

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6OL9KQjL05M

-Atom-
Sep 13, 2003

Contrarian Dick

Bad At Everything

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005

bone shaking.
soul baking.

God I hope I get to see a replay of that live.

Sprecherscrow
Dec 20, 2009

I want a Tate/Caraway reaction video to this.

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005

bone shaking.
soul baking.

Sprecherscrow posted:

I want a Tate/Caraway reaction video to this.

My hand was clearly down on the first knee.

Sprecherscrow
Dec 20, 2009

Mr. Nice! posted:

My hand was clearly down on the first knee.

I forget if this is something she tried to argue at the time or not.

Ditch
Jul 29, 2003

Backdrop Hunger
The Jardines are adorable: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3d1p3vwJTqY

Trast
Oct 20, 2010

Three games, thousands of playthroughs. 90% of the players don't know I exist. Still a redhead saving the galaxy with a [Right Hook].

:edi:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=djV11Xbc914

Intel&Sebastian
Oct 20, 2002

colonel...
i'm trying to sneak around
but i'm dummy thicc
and the clap of my ass cheeks
keeps alerting the guards!
Taaaaaaaaaate onnn kneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee


Taaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaate kneeeeeeeee onnnnnnnnnnnnn

I'll be goooooone, in a round or twoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Duzzy Funlop
Jan 13, 2010

Hi there, would you like to try some spicy products?

That rant about how humanity is completely content with shoveling unhealthy foods into their bodies and how people need to break the cycle is the exact same one my sister keeps giving my family about veganism.

Except this dude lobs chunks of butter into his coffee as a remedy.

fatherdog
Feb 16, 2005

Rich Franklin posted:

I have been in talks with ONE FC about taking a job with them. They offered me a position as VP. I will be heading to ONE FC headquarters in the next few weeks to work out the details. I met with Dana and Lorenzo at the end of last year and they gave me their blessing. I will keep you posted.


That could have interesting implications regarding the relationship between the UFC and OneFC.

henkman
Oct 8, 2008
So I guess he's retired

Keven. Just. Keven
May 25, 2010

MY GOD. THE WILL... THE FIGHTING SPIRIT... JUST WHEN YOU THINK IT'S OVER, TSM COMES BACK STRONGER THAN EVER.
Click the link and read the article. He's taking the position of Voluntary Punching bag & will be fighting random 23 year old wrestlers every month from now till his physical death from aneurism.

Fat Twitter Man
Jan 24, 2007

by R. Guyovich

fatherdog posted:




That could have interesting implications regarding the relationship between the UFC and OneFC.

Hasn't OneFC done the same thing that RFA and other smaller organizations do by saying they're just a regional organization and giving the blessing to their guys going over the UFC? I haven't heard rumors about their funding the way I have about WSOF, but it makes sense that the UFC and OneFC could have a mutually beneficial relationship.

MassRafTer
May 26, 2001

BAEST MODE!!!

Fat Twitter Man posted:

Hasn't OneFC done the same thing that RFA and other smaller organizations do by saying they're just a regional organization and giving the blessing to their guys going over the UFC? I haven't heard rumors about their funding the way I have about WSOF, but it makes sense that the UFC and OneFC could have a mutually beneficial relationship.

I remember when OneFC formed they offered several fighters really good deals to snatch them up so UFC wouldn't sign them. Bibiano Ferdnandes' signing with UFC was even announced before he decided to go to OneFC instead. The relationship may have changed since then, but it started off on an antagonistic note.

DumbWhiteGuy
Jul 4, 2007

You need haters. Fellas if you got 20 haters, you need 40 of them motherfuckers. If there's any haters in here that don't have nobody to hate on, feel free to hate on me

fatherdog posted:




That could have interesting implications regarding the relationship between the UFC and OneFC.

I guess I have a few thoughts:

1. Rich is very much a company man and I think he wouldn't have done this if it in any way jeopardized his relationship with the UFC. He has said before that he was going to be offered one of those Chuck Liddell jobs at the end of his career.

2. What is he going to be doing there? The story says "Vice President" but that title is pretty meaningless in some places. For example, my friend is going to work at a bank in a non-managerial position and they made him Vice President of some crap, while his boss is Senior Vice President of some crap. The UFC has at least 3 or 4 vice presidents that I can name off the top of my head, and some are more meaningful than others.

3. He must be working remotely because I know he is still heavily involved in his juice business, in California. I don't think he is flying the Asia all the time, either.

Meat Recital
Mar 26, 2009

by zen death robot

henkman posted:

So I guess he's retired

I think he has one fight left on his contract and Chael has been on twitter angling for a fight with him. It might be a fun fight, or, with Rich not having fought in well over a year, it might just be depressing.

Bubba Smith
Sep 27, 2004

Is tonight the greatest moment in Dominick Cruz's life?

No.

The greatest moment in my life was realizing that I didn't need a belt to be happy.

DumbWhiteGuy posted:

I guess I have a few thoughts:

2. What is he going to be doing there?

Rich Franklin is being brought in to groom One FC's people to be purchased by UFC in a few years.

Panama Red
Jul 30, 2003

Only in America could you find a way to earn a healthy buck and still keep your attitude on self destruct
Watched a bunch of Anderson Silva fights over the weekend. Won't do a play-by-play of each, but suffice it to say my reaction was pretty similar to most people… The fight with Thales Leites was painfully dull, the Griffin fight was awesome for the mid-backpedal KO punch, the Maia fight was disappointing because I'm a Maia fan, and the first Sonnen fight was really fun to watch. Sonnen really took it to Silva with that steroid strength. Other than his probably wise aversion to going to the ground, I'm definitely a fan. Curious about the remaining fights I have to watch, especially the losses to Weidman, although I think someone said it was only a matter of time before he went up against a talented wrestler who could beat him.

I'm curious -- are there any kickboxer/BJJ fighters out there? I ask because it would seem to be a good arsenal for a fighter to have, striking at long distance but also capable on the ground. Then again, I have to say I haven't seen a lot of well-rounded fighters in my limited experience; Maia is really good at BJJ, Okami is really good at GnP, Silva is really good at countering strikes and striking from the clitch, etc.

What are the chances we'll ever see a Nate Diaz vs Carlos Condit rematch? I know Diaz is holding out over contract negotiation but I'm curious, because I really like Condit and a lot of people recommended the Diaz brothers as popular guys to follow.

Also, is it mandatory that every fighter has to say "He's just a man, he can be defeated" in every pre-fight interview and come out to music by Nickelback, Papa Roach, Salivia, or Drowning Pool? I know Silva has his rap song and Chuck Liddell came out once to "Raining Blood," but I'm genuinely curious who has the best walk-out music in the UFC.

Chexoid
Nov 5, 2009

Now that I have this dating robot I can take it easy.

Panama Red posted:



I'm curious -- are there any kickboxer/BJJ fighters out there? I ask because it would seem to be a good arsenal for a fighter to have, striking at long distance but also capable on the ground. Then again, I have to say I haven't seen a lot of well-rounded fighters in my limited experience; Maia is really good at BJJ, Okami is really good at GnP, Silva is really good at countering strikes and striking from the clitch, etc.



Anthony Pettis is your man. Also, Carlos Condit (RIP.)

Novum
May 26, 2012

That's how we roll

Chexoid posted:

Anthony Pettis is your man. Also, Carlos Condit (RIP.)

Seconded, Pettis has amazing fights.

Yuriy
Dec 25, 2006

Pay no attention to me, for I am a stupid cunt.

quote:

@LynchOnSports 17m
As @FrontRowBrian reported a while ago, looks like Bobby Green is OUT vs. Jim Miller at UFC 172....bummer

Panama Red
Jul 30, 2003

Only in America could you find a way to earn a healthy buck and still keep your attitude on self destruct

Chexoid posted:

Anthony Pettis is your man. Also, Carlos Condit (RIP.)

Ah, thanks -- I heard about him on MMA Beat as being a better face guy for his division than Demetrious Johnson because he's more exciting than Johnson (which is too bad because my understanding is Johnson is an excellent grappler). I'll check him out.

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg
DJ's an awesome fighter and exciting to boot. He's not as flashy as Pettis, but no one really is.

Diddie
Sep 1, 2001

What the heck is going on in here???

Panama Red posted:

Ah, thanks -- I heard about him on MMA Beat as being a better face guy for his division than Demetrious Johnson because he's more exciting than Johnson (which is too bad because my understanding is Johnson is an excellent grappler). I'll check him out.

Jose Aldo kinda fits the description except he rarely has to use his jj and he knows how to defend a take him down. His WEC fights are all good.

Novum
May 26, 2012

That's how we roll
On topic, Donald Cerrone fits that bill as well and he just had a cool fight.

the yeti
Mar 29, 2008

memento disco



Panama Red posted:

Also, is it mandatory that every fighter has to say "He's just a man, he can be defeated" in every pre-fight interview and come out to music by Nickelback, Papa Roach, Salivia, or Drowning Pool? I know Silva has his rap song and Chuck Liddell came out once to "Raining Blood," but I'm genuinely curious who has the best walk-out music in the UFC.

Barnett walks out to Bolt Thrower doesn't he?

Lloyd Boner
Oct 11, 2009

Yes officer, my name is Victoria Sonnen...berg

Diddie posted:

Jose Aldo kinda fits the description except he rarely has to use his jj and he knows how to defend a take him down. His WEC fights are all good.

Also Barao, who likes using his grappling much more than Aldo.

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Keven. Just. Keven
May 25, 2010

MY GOD. THE WILL... THE FIGHTING SPIRIT... JUST WHEN YOU THINK IT'S OVER, TSM COMES BACK STRONGER THAN EVER.
I don't have fight pass but I assume they overdub music for rights reasons which is why you're hearing nothing but generic nu-metal, that kind of fell off in actual events once UFC wasn't broke as hell and had like 6 bands that you were allowed to come out to.

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