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This is a picture of a picture so the quality is poo poo.  Maintenance guy at work managed to burn the brand new truck. Also ruined a van and a staffs car.
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Jun 11, 2014 07:28
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| # ? May 22, 2024 11:52 |
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All these times I have seriously considered getting one of those obnoxious loving 'train horn' kits because apparently the sound of my stock one can't be heard over the radio or the phone or the food or whatever, and nor can my 3.7 liters of naturally aspirated I-wish-I-was-a-V8 fury.
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Jun 11, 2014 07:57
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The Door Frame posted:Ok, that has to be deliberate. How do you gently caress up that bad? You just stop caring. Theres a bunch of people that park directly next to the handicapped spot at the local gas station. You know, the spot blocked off next to handicapped spots so a wheelchair elevator has space to operate? Yeah, every day they park there. I've considered waiting around to regale some poor moron with a story about my brother, the war veteran basket case. How he cries himself to sleep at night every time his wheel chair elevator is blocked from opening in a handicapped spot... I don't have a brother.
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Jun 11, 2014 08:46
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The Door Frame posted:Ok, that has to be deliberate. How do you gently caress up that bad? People are dumb and this blog is great http://myofficeparkinglot.tumblr.com/      
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Jun 11, 2014 11:16
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Saw a new benchmark for stupid on the way home. iPhone, In cradle stuck to the windscreen just to the side of the instruments Facetime... I went the other way in a hurry
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Jun 11, 2014 11:21
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rscott posted:East side supremacy, I take the exchange between Kellogg and 81 at like 65 if there's no one in front of me Sup East side bro  . When my roommate and I were new in time, he had his parents KIA minivan and wanted to show me how fast he could drive through the ramp from EB Kellogg to I-135 and he had the tires sqiealling the entire way. Unfortunately every time I take the ramp I get stuck behind going 30 or 40mph.
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Jun 11, 2014 12:33
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Dear sir/madam, While breakfast remains the most important meal of the day, eating cereal out of a bowl while driving through traffic is likely to have a negative *ahem* impact on your life expectancy. Cut that poo poo out.
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Jun 11, 2014 13:11
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They must be Always Sunny fans. http://itsalwayssunny.wikia.com/wiki/Reynolds_vs._Reynolds:_The_Cereal_Defense
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Jun 11, 2014 13:37
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Here's something that grinds my gears. In a left turn lane, behind several other vehicles. Protected green arrow appears, cars slowly loving lurch their way through the intersection. Protected green arrow turns into a flashing yellow arrow and oncoming through traffic's light turns green. There is one car ahead of me in the left turn lane. Despite the arrow JUST having turned from green to flashing yellow, the car ahead of me slams on its brakes. Six cars could have safely made that left turn after it started flashing yellow. Does the driver ahead of me think that oncoming traffic is going to magically teleport sixty feet ahead and make it unsafe to turn? Who the gently caress knows. Then I get stuck for another full light cycle. Thanks bro.
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Jun 11, 2014 15:12
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I had a good one today: trying to get on 494 from highway 100 in Minneapolis. For whatever stupid reason the right lane was mostly stopped with people trying to get off of 494 and on to 100 and vice-vesa. Right lane was stopped, left lane was moving but there is where genius comes along. She decides that the best way to get into the right lane is not to wait for an opening and merge, but to come to a complete stop with her turn signal on and wait for someone to let her in. After about 5 minutes of this not only was the right lane stopped but now the left lane was backed up as well. Way to go Crossover Lady. TL;DR: don't stop on a busy freeway, even if you really, really need to merge.
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Jun 11, 2014 15:22
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Astonishing Wang posted:Everybody chime in - What are some other state-specific names that people call out-of-towners? "tourist gently caress"
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Jun 11, 2014 15:49
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In Montana, the biggest insult is "Californians." They move a little slower out that way, I guess they just haven't come up with a clever name for yuppies buying farmland to build a vacation mansion. Here in Illinois anyone from Wisconsin is a cheesehead. They call us 'fibs' (for loving illinois bastard).
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Jun 11, 2014 15:55
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Jun 11, 2014 16:38
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It is a compact though, by virtue of being a Tahoe instead of a Suburban.
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Jun 11, 2014 16:51
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N is for Nipples posted:It is a compact though, by virtue of being a Tahoe instead of a Suburban. I had to begrudgingly admire the great back-in job.
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Jun 11, 2014 17:01
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Mahmoud Ahmadinejad posted:People are dumb and this blog is great http://myofficeparkinglot.tumblr.com/ Amazing.
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Jun 11, 2014 17:25
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xzzy posted:The open road rule is if you see a car on the onramp, doesn't matter if it's a semi or a passenger car, you get in the left lane if there's room. It's basic common courtesy. Driver's Ed 101. When you see a car merging on to the freeway with you, there are three options: Speed Up, Slow Down, or Move Over. No one seems to grasp or remember this. Driver's Ed should be much more stringent and loving mandatory in this country.
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Jun 11, 2014 17:38
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Astonishing Wang posted:Everybody chime in - What are some other state-specific names that people call out-of-towners? Tourons. We drive on the left, and most out-of-towners aren't in the habit of looking to the right before stepping off the curb. They are easily avoided... generally all that's needed here is a toot of the horn and a waggle of the finger. Also, rental-car hilarity. Every rental vehicle has a huge decal attached to its dash reminding drivers to KEEP LEFT! The success rate of this sign is inversely proportional to the driver's BAC. There is a blind 110-degree corner just up the road from my house, which is along the route to one of the more popular tourist attractions. Add a carload of tourists to one granny in an SUV with 300BHP that can't see over the wheel, mix in a bit of EtOH and smesh.  Good evening 911 how can I help.(checks CallerID info) oh hello BCM. Another crash? Yeah, right in the usual spot. OK. They need an ambulance and tow trucks? No tow. They say they are OK. Best to send an ambulance and a unit to write this up. Alright then. Talk to you later. I hope not!(mutual laughter)
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Jun 11, 2014 18:03
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buttcrackmenace posted:
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Jun 11, 2014 18:29
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Liquid_Table posted:Driver's Ed 101. When you see a car merging on to the freeway with you, there are three options: Speed Up, Slow Down, or Move Over. No one seems to grasp or remember this. Driver's Ed should be much more stringent and loving mandatory in this country. ITS MAH RAGHT TO DRIVE MAH CAR. The sense of entitlement most Americans have about cars is rather absurd. It doesn't help that you need a car to do/get to 90% of work.
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Jun 11, 2014 18:50
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Krakkles posted:That's hilarious. Isn't it 999, though? in the BVI, sure. I'm in the USVI. 
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Jun 11, 2014 18:50
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buttcrackmenace posted:in the BVI, sure. I'm in the USVI.
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Jun 11, 2014 19:14
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Had a good one today. Young lad in a modified VW Lupo, lowered quite a bit, driving right up my chuff because I was doing the speed limit in a housing estate. Perhaps if he'd been a bit farther back, he'd have noticed the fairly vicious speed hump which, being in a car I don't particularly care about, I led our impromptu convoy over at 30. Pretty sure his testicles are now internal organs. And he had his girlfriend in the car too.  Earlier was a more mundane one. Come up a residential street, and you've got people parked all up one side, my left, effectively making it a single lane. Some woman pulls out of a junction a little way up the road, and just starts down toward me. Then realises I'm coming the other way. Then gets irritated and starts flapping her hands around when I make hand gestures (no, not those kind) to her that she needs to move back. Yes, technically, as I was overtaking parked cars on "her" side of the road, she had right of way, but I was already most of the way past by the point she made an appearance, and I'm not reversing a hundred yards down a street just because she's too dozy to look before pulling out. How do they even enforce these? What's the legal definition of "compact"?
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Jun 11, 2014 19:54
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puberty worked me over fucked around with this message at 02:18 on Jun 24, 2019 |
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Jun 11, 2014 19:56
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InitialDave posted:Had a good one today. Young lad in a modified VW Lupo, lowered quite a bit, driving right up my chuff because I was doing the speed limit in a housing estate. Perhaps if he'd been a bit farther back, he'd have noticed the fairly vicious speed hump which, being in a car I don't particularly care about, I led our impromptu convoy over at 30. Pretty sure his testicles are now internal organs. And he had his girlfriend in the car too. They can't, really, and half the time the compact spots aren't even that much smaller than the regular spots. I swear to god, all parking spots have been slowly getting narrower for a few years now.
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Jun 11, 2014 19:57
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InitialDave posted:How do they even enforce these? What's the legal definition of "compact"? I don't think they do, since these spots are always on private property it's mostly a tresspassing style issue.. you break the owners rule he gets to have you towed away. There's no legal protection for it. There's a Whole Foods near me that has designated a half dozen spots for "fuel efficient vehicles" which always have Escalades crammed into them.
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Jun 11, 2014 20:02
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I believe "compact" spaces are more of a legal loophole for the property owner. Many municipalities have formulas that define the number of parking spaces a given shop / business / multifamily residence must have, based on the square footage / number of homes. However, these laws often don't dictate that all of them have to be big enough to fit every car - so if you are running low on parking lot space, you can build some smaller-than-spec spaces and mark them as compact spaces. There was a developer here in AZ that abused the gently caress out of this ~15 years ago and put in a large retail development (24-screen theater, back when those were a new thing) that was probably half compact spaces, many of which weren't even labeled as such. The city eventually made them restripe the whole lot.
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Jun 11, 2014 20:10
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Interesting. Things got bad enough here that they banned private clamping, and effectively banned private towing (you can only move the car enough to stop it being an obstruction, and can't charge for it). Instead, they get your details from the DVLA and send you a snotty letter with a charge fee (specifically not a penalty, as they have no legal power to issue penalties). The downside is that where these kinds of letters could previously be used as emergency Andrex substitute, they are now enforceable. The general technique is a pointed discussion with the business owner/manager about your expenditure in their store, so they overrule the agency contracted for the parking. As for special spaces, disabled ones should be treated as important and only used by those who need them, but gently caress "parent and child" spots. You haven't got broken legs, you can stroll another fifty yards like the rest of us, and if junior makes this annoying for you, tough. We're also seeing a growth in electric vehicle charging spots, which I hope will be enforced. If I turned up somewhere and couldn't refuel for the rest of my journey because someone left an electric car in front of a fuel pump, I'd be pretty pissed off, so it has to cut the other way too.
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Jun 11, 2014 20:12
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Liquid_Table posted:Right lane was stopped, left lane was moving but there is where genius comes along. She decides that the best way to get into the right lane is not to wait for an opening and merge, but to come to a complete stop with her turn signal on and wait for someone to let her in. After about 5 minutes of this not only was the right lane stopped but now the left lane was backed up as well. Another successful application of the zipper merge. Look at how well it reduces traffic jams.
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Jun 11, 2014 22:03
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The worst is the "fuel efficient vehicles only" in front of Whole Foods. I enjoy parking in those when I can. I mean my car IS more efficient than a truck so I guess I'm ok? Its basically everything wrong with Whole Foods summed up.
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Jun 11, 2014 22:06
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I have the most fuel efficient production rotary engine ever designed in my car. That means I've got a PZEV right? 
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Jun 11, 2014 22:12
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Crotch Fruit posted:Sup East side bro They put in a dedicated turn lane at the 53rd street on ramp on I-35 and it makes taking that turn at like 40-45 and powersliding around so much fun, I'm just afraid Park City cops are going to get all up in my poo poo because my tires are pretty bad and squeal at the slightest provocation
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Jun 11, 2014 22:24
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Extra posted:In fact a car that maintains its speed in the right lane of the highway (usually someone in cruise control at around 60-70mph) is my favorite because then I can easily slow down and merge in behind them. This. I hate when I slow down to merge only to find the person already on the highway also slowed down and now we're right next to each other.
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Jun 11, 2014 22:34
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Had my first proper emergency stop / threshold breaking exercise today. Driver #1 is in the left lane, needs to be in the middle lane, signals and waits to merge over while crawling along at 5mph. (This happens all the time on this road, people getting into the wrong lane and wanting to merge over at the last second) Driver #2 in the middle lane stops dead from 30 without checking his mirrors to allow the guy to merge in front of him. I'm sat in the middle lane about 5 car lengths back doing 30 behind a forester which notices the guy in front isn't moving and slams on the brakes, screeching to a halt inches from driver #2's rear end. I drop it into 2nd and manage to stop just before the forester, not without having to swerve a little into the right lane though. I don't care if you think you're being polite, you don't just stop in the middle of the drat road. 
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Jun 11, 2014 22:51
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Chinatown posted:The worst is the "fuel efficient vehicles only" in front of Whole Foods. I enjoy parking in those when I can. I mean my car IS more efficient than a truck so I guess I'm ok? Harris Teeter has these as well, I love parking in them every chance I get to piss off the smug-douches. Although I think the Corolla is a ULEV so it technically qualifies. Need to fix one of my less efficient cars so I can incite more yuppy rage.
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Jun 11, 2014 23:33
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Chinatown posted:The worst is the "fuel efficient vehicles only" in front of Whole Foods. I enjoy parking in those when I can. I mean my car IS more efficient than a truck so I guess I'm ok? In front of Ralphs they moved all of the handicapped spots 20ft further away to make room for the "electric charging spots" so all the do-gooder yuppies can park as close as gently caress to the doors as possible while the cripples have to crawl twice the distance.
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Jun 12, 2014 00:25
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Isn't it more so they can run the power cabling to them cheaper?
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Jun 12, 2014 00:27
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InitialDave posted:Isn't it more so they can run the power cabling to them cheaper? It'd be unfair to burden people who can afford an entire electric car with the cost of a 20 foot extension cable, when you can tell a guy without legs to quit being a pussy and walk it off.  edit: and if your Tesla quick charger requires more than an orange extension cord to charge at 200 amps and 600 volts, Double gently caress you.
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Jun 12, 2014 00:35
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InitialDave posted:Isn't it more so they can run the power cabling to them cheaper? Maybe, but it doesnt really seem very fair to anyone else. Other spots they eradicated were 10-minute parking spots so people could run in and pick up some eggs and get out, without parking much further away. Now I'm curious, how much charge do Volts and priuses get in a typical 30-40 minute supermarket stay?
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Jun 12, 2014 00:43
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| # ? May 22, 2024 11:52 |
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Extra posted:Driver's Ed 101. When you are merging on to the freeway, there are three options: Speed Up, Slow Down, or Stop. No one seems to grasp or remember this. Driver's Ed should be much more stringent and loving mandatory in this country. If you stop, there better be stopped traffic on the highway next to you or an rear end in a top hat pacing you to the end of the merge lane.
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Jun 12, 2014 00:45
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