The Simpsons Quote Thread - Put a sock in it, Roy

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > TV IV > The Simpsons Quote Thread - Put a sock in it, Roy

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PT6A: Jan 5, 2006; Public school teachers are callous dictators who won't lift a finger to stop children from peeing in my plane

TMMadman posted:

There is a poison one, isn't there, IMJack?

I talked to the lawyers about that. They considered it murder.

# ? Jul 11, 2014 23:59

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# ? Jun 7, 2024 22:29

Luigi Thirty: Apr 30, 2006; Emergency confection port.

PT6A posted:

I talked to the lawyers about that. They considered it murder.

Would you take an out-of-state two-party bad check?

# ? Jul 12, 2014 00:27

CharlieFoxtrot: Mar 27, 2007; organize digital employees

PT6A posted:

I talked to the lawyers about that. They considered it murder.

Well, once a man is in your home, anything you do to him is nice and legal...

# ? Jul 12, 2014 00:32

Writer Cath: Apr 1, 2007; Box. Flipped.; Plaster Town Cop

Luigi Thirty posted:

Would you take an out-of-state two-party bad check?

Your non-laminated, out of state driver's license is good enough for me.

# ? Jul 12, 2014 00:39

jscolon2.0: Jul 9, 2001; With great payroll, comes great disappointment.

PT6A posted:

I talked to the lawyers about that. They considered it murder.

You have selected regicide. If you know the name of the king or queen being murdered, press 1.

# ? Jul 12, 2014 00:55

CatchrNdRy: Mar 15, 2005; Receiver of the Rye.

jscolon2.0 posted:

You have selected regicide. If you know the name of the king or queen being murdered, press 1.

But Homer, tomorrow's our reception for Queen Beatrice of the Netherlands!

# ? Jul 12, 2014 01:07

Writer Cath: Apr 1, 2007; Box. Flipped.; Plaster Town Cop

CatchrNdRy posted:

But Homer, tomorrow's our reception for Queen Beatrice of the Netherlands!

Help me get through this and I'll get back to killing you with beer.

# ? Jul 12, 2014 01:13

Monday_: Feb 18, 2006; Worked-up silent dork without sex ability seeks oblivion and demise.; The Great Twist

Luigi Thirty posted:

Would you take an out-of-state two-party bad check?

Mr. Thirty, this check is dated January 1st, 2054.

# ? Jul 12, 2014 02:05

TMMadman: Sep 9, 2003; by Fluffdaddy

CatchrNdRy posted:

But Homer, tomorrow's our reception for Queen Beatrice of the Netherlands!

I'm afraid we have a bad image, Sir. Market research shows people see you as something of an ogre.

# ? Jul 12, 2014 02:31

IMJack: Apr 16, 2003; Royalty is a continuous ripping and tearing motion.; Fun Shoe

TMMadman posted:

I'm afraid we have a bad image, Sir. Market research shows people see you as something of an ogre.

I ought to club them and eat their bones. :mad:

# ? Jul 12, 2014 02:36

Everything Counts: Oct 10, 2012; Don't "shhh!" me, you rich bastard!

IMJack posted:

I ought to club them and eat their bones.

Mmmmm... open-faced club sandwich....

# ? Jul 12, 2014 02:46

Root Bear: Nov 15, 2004; DARKEST SKETCH

jscolon2.0 posted:

You have selected regicide. If you know the name of the king or queen being murdered, press 1.

What? How dare you?! If I find out who this is, I'll staple a flag to your butt, and mail you to Iran! :mad:

# ? Jul 12, 2014 02:50

Drink-Mix Man: Mar 4, 2003; You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

MondayHotDog posted:

Mr. Thirty, this check is dated January 1st, 2054.

# ? Jul 12, 2014 03:03

TMMadman: Sep 9, 2003; by Fluffdaddy

IMJack posted:

I ought to club them and eat their bones.

Don't concern yourself. If things had turned ugly, I always had my mace.

# ? Jul 12, 2014 04:06

Jerusalem: May 20, 2004; Would you be my new best friends?

Luckily I invested in mace before the collapse of society.

# ? Jul 12, 2014 04:09

IMJack: Apr 16, 2003; Royalty is a continuous ripping and tearing motion.; Fun Shoe

Is that a new kind of mace? It's really painful!

# ? Jul 12, 2014 04:19

Luigi Thirty: Apr 30, 2006; Emergency confection port.

TMMadman posted:

Don't concern yourself. If things had turned ugly, I always had my mace.

Hey everybody! If you want to ask Burns for a favor, now's the time! He's doped up, or dying, or something!

# ? Jul 12, 2014 04:33

After The War: Apr 12, 2005; to all of my Architects
let me be traitor

IMJack posted:

Is that a new kind of mace? It's really painful! +

One spritz and you're south of the border!

Mmmm... incapacitating.

# ? Jul 12, 2014 05:24

TMMadman: Sep 9, 2003; by Fluffdaddy

Luigi Thirty posted:

Hey everybody! If you want to ask Burns for a favor, now's the time! He's doped up, or dying, or something!

Clean out your desk, you're gone.

# ? Jul 12, 2014 06:08

Drink-Mix Man: Mar 4, 2003; You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

After The War posted:

One spritz and you're south of the border!

Mmmm... incapacitating.

I am in flavor country.

# ? Jul 12, 2014 06:14

gingerberger: Jun 20, 2014; Gotta love my Squirtle Swag

CharlieFoxtrot posted:

Well, once a man is in your home, anything you do to him is nice and legal...

Oh CharlieFoxtrot... won't you join me in my kitchen?

# ? Jul 12, 2014 07:29

Tokelau All Star: Feb 23, 2008; THE TAXES! THE FINGER THING MEANS THE TAXES!

Luigi Thirty posted:

Hey everybody! If you want to ask Burns for a favor, now's the time! He's doped up, or dying, or something!

NGYEAAAAH!

Tokelau All Star fucked around with this message at 07:42 on Jul 12, 2014

# ? Jul 12, 2014 07:38

gingerberger: Jun 20, 2014; Gotta love my Squirtle Swag

Bake him away toys...

# ? Jul 12, 2014 07:54

Jorghnassen: Oct 1, 2007; Glouton des fjords

Have the Rolling Stones killed!

RIP Tommy Ramone

# ? Jul 12, 2014 12:17

Jerusalem: May 20, 2004; Would you be my new best friends?

You know on the show, we were always trying to kill the Cartwrights, but I guess old Father Time beat us to it!

# ? Jul 12, 2014 13:05

mrfart: May 26, 2004; Dear diary, today I
became a captain.

Drink-Mix Man posted:

I am in flavor country.

# ? Jul 12, 2014 13:22

Jerusalem: May 20, 2004; Would you be my new best friends?

Hey, this guy's paying up!

Edit: Alternatively, let's take this to strange new places...

# ? Jul 12, 2014 13:31

twerking on the railroad: Jun 23, 2007; Get on my level

Jerusalem posted:

Hey, this guy's paying up!

Edit: Alternatively, let's take this to strange new places...

I would like a single plum soaked in perfume served in a man's hat

# ? Jul 12, 2014 16:48

gingerberger: Jun 20, 2014; Gotta love my Squirtle Swag

Skeesix posted:

I would like a single plum soaked in perfume served in a man's hat

Here ya go.

# ? Jul 12, 2014 16:51

Drink-Mix Man: Mar 4, 2003; You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Skeesix posted:

I would like a single plum soaked in perfume served in a man's hat

Beer it is.

# ? Jul 12, 2014 16:56

gingerberger: Jun 20, 2014; Gotta love my Squirtle Swag

Drink-Mix Man posted:

Beer it is.

Co-Fee

# ? Jul 12, 2014 17:10

Drink-Mix Man: Mar 4, 2003; You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Drink-Mix Man posted:

Beer it is.

gingerberger posted:

Co-Fee

Oh, why did I have all that beer, and coffee, and watermelon? :sweatdrop:

# ? Jul 12, 2014 17:13

CatchrNdRy: Mar 15, 2005; Receiver of the Rye.

Jerusalem posted:

Hey, this guy's paying up!

Edit: Alternatively, let's take this to strange new places...

well well well well well well

# ? Jul 12, 2014 23:50

twerking on the railroad: Jun 23, 2007; Get on my level

Drink-Mix Man posted:

Oh, why did I have all that beer, and coffee, and watermelon?

Oh I knew I shouldn't have eaten that package of powdered gravy I found in the parking lot!

# ? Jul 13, 2014 00:06

gingerberger: Jun 20, 2014; Gotta love my Squirtle Swag

Well shut my mouth; it's also illegal to put squirrels down your pants for the purpose of gambling.

# ? Jul 13, 2014 00:13

IMJack: Apr 16, 2003; Royalty is a continuous ripping and tearing motion.; Fun Shoe

Drink-Mix Man posted:

Oh, why did I have all that beer, and coffee, and watermelon?

No bathroom, only klavkolosh. Bathroom in tower, tower.

# ? Jul 13, 2014 00:14

Monday_: Feb 18, 2006; Worked-up silent dork without sex ability seeks oblivion and demise.; The Great Twist

gingerberger posted:

Well shut my mouth; it's also illegal to put squirrels down your pants for the purpose of gambling.

Remember when I got caught stealing all those watches from Sears? Well you have a gambling problem!

# ? Jul 13, 2014 00:30

gingerberger: Jun 20, 2014; Gotta love my Squirtle Swag

IMJack posted:

No bathroom, only klavkolosh. Bathroom in tower, tower.

Mountain Dew or crab juice?

# ? Jul 13, 2014 00:31

gingerberger: Jun 20, 2014; Gotta love my Squirtle Swag

MondayHotDog posted:

Remember when I got caught stealing all those watches from Sears? Well you have a gambling problem!

Every time I learn something new it just pushes something old out.
Like remember that time I took that wine-making class and then forgot how to drive?

# ? Jul 13, 2014 00:31

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# ? Jun 7, 2024 22:29

Jerusalem: May 20, 2004; Would you be my new best friends?

gingerberger posted:

Every time I learn something new it just pushes something old out.
Like remember that time I took that wine-making class and then forgot how to drive?

You were sleeping in an oxygen tent you believed gave you sexual powers! :mad:

# ? Jul 13, 2014 00:48

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > TV IV > The Simpsons Quote Thread - Put a sock in it, Roy

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