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Do over Ham posted:They warned me Satan would be attractive. I wanted to kill the world's greatest lover.... but there are laws against suicide  Genius at Work posted:But surely there are also laws against murder too!
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Jul 17, 2014 07:59
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Do over Ham posted:They warned me Satan would be attractive. Say your prayers Simpson! Cause the schools can't make you like they should.
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Jul 17, 2014 08:41
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gingerberger posted:Say your prayers Simpson! Cause the schools can't make you like they should. That sounds like a prayer! A prayer in a public school.... God has no place within these walls! Just as facts have no place within organized religion!
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Jul 17, 2014 11:01
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Jerusalem posted:I wanted to kill the world's greatest lover.... but there are laws against suicide No wonder I didn't hear about Jerusalem being elected world's greatest sex machine.
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Jul 17, 2014 15:00
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After The War posted:And while MondayHotDog plays rock music on a stolen guitar, PTA6 has the "munchies" for a California Cheeseburger! Well, I've got news for you: I just got promoted, and it's all thanks to Yes-I-Cannabis! We have a kitchen???
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Jul 17, 2014 15:13
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Wow, I had mustard? 
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Jul 17, 2014 16:11
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Jorghnassen posted:Wow, I had mustard? I made a movie? I guess that's why I'm on the front page of entertainment weakly!
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Jul 17, 2014 16:14
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Skeesix posted:I made a movie? Schindler es bueno, señor burns es el diablo...
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Jul 17, 2014 17:58
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Jul 17, 2014 19:24
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Sit perfectly still! Only I may dance.
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Jul 17, 2014 19:49
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Jorghnassen posted:Wow, I had mustard? This is Armin's apartment, Armin's mustard, Armin's copy of "Swank", Armin's frozen peas.
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Jul 17, 2014 19:52
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Wooza waza? Is that what passes for comedy these days?
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Jul 17, 2014 19:52
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PT6A posted:Well, I've got news for you: I just got promoted, and it's all thanks to Yes-I-Cannabis! Start inhalin', Waylon. 
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Jul 17, 2014 19:56
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Drink-Mix Man posted:This is Armin's apartment, Armin's mustard, Armin's copy of "Swank", Armin's frozen peas. Can I see your copy of "Swank", Armin?
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Jul 17, 2014 20:45
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TMMadman posted:Can I see your copy of "Swank", Armin? How could I charge full price to the man whose lust for filthy magazines kept me in business during that first shaky year? Oh, by the way, here is your new issue of "Gigantic Asses."
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Jul 17, 2014 21:51
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Yeah, uh, give me one of those porno magazines, a large box of condoms, a bottle of Old Harper, a box of panty shields... and some illegal fireworks... and one of those disposable enemas. Eh, make it two.
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Jul 17, 2014 23:19
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Luigi Thirty posted:Yeah, uh, give me one of those porno magazines, a large box of condoms, a bottle of Old Harper, a box of panty shields... and some illegal fireworks... and one of those disposable enemas. Celebrate your countries independence by blowing up a small part of it
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Jul 18, 2014 00:44
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gingerberger posted:Celebrate your countries independence by blowing up a small part of it Mr. Vice President! Someone finally bought a copy of your book, sir.
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Jul 18, 2014 01:14
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Jorghnassen posted:Mr. Vice President! Someone finally bought a copy of your book, sir. Maybe they're all reverse vampires and have to get home before dark...
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Jul 18, 2014 01:21
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 And this guy is the head of the Spaceology Department of the Correspondence College of Tampa!
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Jul 18, 2014 01:30
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Tokelau All Star posted:
Homer when I met you you weren't an astronaut; you didn't even know how to use a touchtone. But I still respected you and I always will no matter what [beep boop boop] Homer you already dialed.
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Jul 18, 2014 01:49
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gingerberger posted:Homer when I met you you weren't an astronaut; you didn't even know how to use a touchtone. But I still respected you and I always will no matter what [beep boop boop] Homer you already dialed. The fingers you have used to dial are too fat. To obtain a special dialing wand, please mash the keypad with your palm now.
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Jul 18, 2014 02:39
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MondayHotDog posted:The fingers you have used to dial are too fat. To obtain a special dialing wand, please mash the keypad with your palm now. I don't want to look like a weirdo... Just give me a muumuu
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Jul 18, 2014 02:47
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 DIE YOU CHALK FACED GOONS RIP Johnny Winter
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Jul 18, 2014 06:12
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CatchrNdRy posted:
Hello St. Louis!
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Jul 18, 2014 06:26
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gingerberger posted:Hello St. Louis! Good night, Springton. There will be no encores.
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Jul 18, 2014 06:33
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Have the Rolling Stones killed.
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Jul 18, 2014 06:35
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Who here likes the Doobie Brothers? Because we've got one of 'em!
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Jul 18, 2014 06:59
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IMJack posted:Who here likes the Doobie Brothers? Because we've got one of 'em! Get help love. Call Interpol, get me a hacksaw, anything!
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Jul 18, 2014 07:21
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gingerberger posted:Hello St. Louis! East St. Louis?
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Jul 18, 2014 07:29
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TMMadman posted:East St. Louis? Where the monorail is king!
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Jul 18, 2014 08:16
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Luigi Thirty posted:Where the monorail is king! ...sorry mom the mob has spoken!
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Jul 18, 2014 09:41
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IMJack posted:Who here likes the Doobie Brothers? Because we've got one of 'em! I thought we were Quiet Riot?
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Jul 18, 2014 13:53
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I'm in the middle of a break of a day long interview. Give me some Simpsony encouragement.
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Jul 18, 2014 15:20
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Drink-Mix Man posted:I thought we were Quiet Riot? We need a ride home! 
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Jul 18, 2014 15:40
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jscolon2.0 posted:I'm in the middle of a break of a day long interview. Give me some Simpsony encouragement. Your baby, Maggie Simpson, is dead.
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Jul 18, 2014 17:11
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jscolon2.0 posted:I'm in the middle of a break of a day long interview. Give me some Simpsony encouragement. I've got to find a replacement that won't outshine me. Perhaps if I searched the employee evaluations for the word "Incompetent"... 714 matches found 714 names? Better be more specific. "lazy", "clumsy", "dim-witted", "monstrously ugly"... 714 matches found Oh, nuts to this! I'll just go get jscolon2.0
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Jul 18, 2014 17:22
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jscolon2.0 posted:I'm in the middle of a break of a day long interview. Give me some Simpsony encouragement.  There, there. There, there.
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Jul 18, 2014 17:31
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jscolon2.0 posted:I'm in the middle of a break of a day long interview. Give me some Simpsony encouragement. Now, we need code names. I'll be Cue-Ball, Skinner can be Eight-Ball, Barney will be Twelve-Ball, and Moe, you can be Cue-Ball.
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Jul 18, 2014 19:37
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jscolon2.0 posted:I'm in the middle of a break of a day long interview. Give me some Simpsony encouragement. Now jscolon, remember: if something goes wrong in the interview, blame the guy who doesn't speak English. Ahh, IMJack. How many times have you saved my butt? Good luck!
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Jul 18, 2014 19:38
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