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 Test Tournament 2, Week 1, Match 8  Today the Throwbacks face off against Grab 'n Stab! The Throwbacks give us Skate the yeti (managed by Silverminnow), The Beast the identity-afflicted human (astus), Lionheart Jack the human (Jack the Lad) and Taardvark the molemarian (Ninjavitis). Grab 'n Stab responds with the aptly-named Little Bastard the gremlin (Testekill), Windy Mole the molemarian (pantherrpg), Autoerotic Asphyxiation the strangler (AJ_Impy) and Not Ready Yeti the yeti (Goodchild).  The circus kicks off with the two teams clashing in the middle. Windy Mole's sharp mole teeth sink into Skate's left arm, granting him first blood, but the yeti shakes the molemarian off easily. Lionheart Jack bruises one of Windy's feet with his warhammer in retaliation.  The teams trade glancing blows until Autoerotic Asphyxiation makes a critical early blow: severing Taardvark's spear arm with a single swing of his pick. Immediately after, the ferocious strangler charges Lionheart Jack and the two tumble to the ground. Little Bastard takes advantage of the distraction to cut Skate's hamstrings with his shining blue dagger, sending the yeti to the floor alongside Jack.  Little Bastard then kicks with his tiny foot and crushes Skate's right middle finger. The yeti collapses from the agony. Windy bites Skate in the head and shakes him about, unable to inflict any real damage through the yeti's thick hide. The other fighters continue slap-fighting.  Little Bastard smashes The Beast (the blue X, along with Lionheart Jack) in the teeth with the pommel of his dagger and they go flying across the arena. Lionheart Jack's armor protects him from any real harm, though, a steel shell fending off Little Bastard and Autoerotic. Windy continues to chew on Skate's head. The circus's second act begins with a highly contested and dubiously legal maneuver, for reasons that will soon become clear:  Not Ready Yeti, contrary to his name, grabs Taardvark by the toe and throws the molemarian across the arena--directly into his teammate Autoerotic Asphyxiation. The molemarian smashes the tiny strangler like a freight train and he goes flying. Taardvark stands up unharmed, though stunned from the impact.  Little Bastard sends Skate's head on the same trajectory when he severs it from the yeti's body, scoring the first kill of the match. Skate's head will eventually land in the water outside the arena. The Beast's spine-severing assault on Windy sends the moleman to the ground, but he rears up and bites the aspiring lumberjack in the arm, shredding the muscle. The strongman collapses from the pain.   Autoerotic Asphyxiation then smashes into the ground and explodes like an overripe cantaloupe, scoring Not Ready Yeti a kill and rendering this the first instance of teamkilling I have ever seen--and the first ever in Arena history.   Windy Mole shakes The Beast like a ragdoll, tearing precious arteries. Little Bastard and Not Ready Yeti manage to penetrate Lionheart Jack's steel shell with a devastating double attack--the gremlin spills the knight's guts and the yeti caves his chest in. Lionheart Jack collapses from pain, leaving the unarmed and un-armed Taardvark the only conscious fighter on the side of the Throwbacks.  Despite his lack of consciousness, Not Ready Yeti can't harm Lionheart Jack through his armor, and so resorts to the tried-and-true King Technique--he systematically breaks all of the human's limbs with joint locks. Taardvark nobly charges Little Bastard and tries to take the gremlin down with shield bashes, but his unskilled swings go wide. Once Jack is thoroughly crippled, Not Ready Yeti smashes the human's armored skull with a single punch.  Meanwhile, Windy switches his focus from The Beast's arm to his head. The shock jolts him awake briefly, but he wills himself back into unconsciousness when he sees what's become of his team. Not Ready Yeti, ever the creative one, punches in his head soon after. The lone Taardvark tries his best, but all he can manage to do is tear his fellow molemarian Windy's throat with a bite and scratch off his nose. He suffers a tirade of abuse, including Little Bastard stabbing his lungs full of holes while Not Ready Yeti grapples him down. Before long, Little Bastard sends yet another body part flying out of the arena by separating his head from his body.  Grab 'n Stab have beaten Throwbacks...4-1? Kills: Not Ready Yeti 3 (1 teamkill), Little Bastard 2 Combat Log King Cohort fucked around with this message at 06:11 on Sep 21, 2014 |
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Sep 21, 2014 03:10
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| # ? May 30, 2024 23:21 |
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drat, sorry team. That team kill though, holy crap. Anyway that's the end of round one! Everybody place your bets for round two! Silverminnow fucked around with this message at 03:23 on Sep 21, 2014 |
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Sep 21, 2014 03:18
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So that's what a yeti looks like when it isn't shot in the guts early on.
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Sep 21, 2014 03:23
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That was amazing. I get a loving 4-0 yawnfest, this guy gets team kills.
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Sep 21, 2014 03:23
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The first ever blue on blue in Arena history, making us the first team to rack up five kills in a four-man event. All that, and AA disarmed the molemarian. Works for me! 5-0 to the Grab n' Stab!
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Sep 21, 2014 03:27
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That's the worst fastball special I've ever seen.
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Sep 21, 2014 03:41
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Worst or Best? Maybe Not Ready Yeti hates stranglers, you guys don't know! And I haven't asked him. But really, Autoerotic Asphyxiation, try not to explode when Yeti unleashes his super special two man toe throw.
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Sep 21, 2014 04:50
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That was some match!
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Sep 21, 2014 09:25
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That's why you don't let a midget run around with a knife, it just results in bad times.
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Sep 21, 2014 09:39
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Yeah, as much as the focus has been on the amazing teamkill, that was probably the best performance from a gremlin I've ever seen in these tournaments.
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Sep 21, 2014 10:31
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Reminder: All of you can bet again now. The next match might be scary. Ugly Stick has a decent skill based build, and good enough weapons to present a risk to our armored guys. Should be interesting to watch.
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Sep 21, 2014 11:04
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Hmm. How many points would it be to have a Molemarian as a ballistic weapon?
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Sep 21, 2014 11:39
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Never be not betting everything.
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Sep 21, 2014 11:58
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Jazzimus, is there any chance we can adjust the build of Brother Boccob (managed by Frozen_Flame) for round 2 so that he has marksdwarf skill rather than archer? I mean, there's fun gimmick testing builds and then there's honest mistakes that basically doom the team.
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Sep 21, 2014 12:51
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Maugrim posted:Jazzimus, is there any chance we can adjust the build of Brother Boccob (managed by Frozen_Flame) for round 2 so that he has marksdwarf skill rather than archer? Oh, is that what happened? Ouch. 
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Sep 21, 2014 15:23
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I'll lend a vote for letting them fix it, if it means anything.
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Sep 21, 2014 15:53
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Podima posted:Oh, is that what happened? Ouch. Yeah, I've been picking up a lot of late night pub shifts recently, and rushed a build out assuming I could test it out. Whoops! At least I have a trophy for most ineffectual Martial Trance. Made from my own skull.
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Sep 21, 2014 16:47
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Maugrim posted:Jazzimus, is there any chance we can adjust the build of Brother Boccob (managed by Frozen_Flame) for round 2 so that he has marksdwarf skill rather than archer? I'm in favor of this. For those who aren't in on this: Brother Boccob's got archery skill but no crossbow skill. Both do seem to play into your effectiveness at range, but as we've seen demonstrated, the crossbow skill governs reloading speed. I don't think that there's much more to test as it stands; if you rely on just archery and no weapon skill, you aren't much of a team player.
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Sep 21, 2014 20:12
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Eeny, meeny, miny, moe, Catch a moleman by the toe. If he hollers, at friend throw, Eeny, meeny, miny, moe.
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Sep 21, 2014 20:21
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Yeah, i say give him a chance. I wanna see what that martial trance would have been like if he'd been specced up right.
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Sep 21, 2014 20:28
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Frozen_flame posted:Yeah, I've been picking up a lot of late night pub shifts recently, and rushed a build out assuming I could test it out. Whoops! I've PM'ed you a proposal that should make your guy more viable while still being fair. Let me know if you want to go with it.
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Sep 21, 2014 22:03
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Voting for unfucking Boccob. Oh, Jazzimus is on it. Okie doke.
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Sep 21, 2014 22:04
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Speaking of which, do we get points to upgrade our guys for the next round at some point, or are we not doing that anymore?
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Sep 21, 2014 23:01
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Ignite Memories posted:Speaking of which, do we get points to upgrade our guys for the next round at some point, or are we not doing that anymore? Currently, you only get points if you advance after the three-match round robin.
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Sep 21, 2014 23:02
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Oh, that reminds me. In the last tournament I noticed that my team received upgrade points when they advanced to the third place bout. Was that the expected/desired behavior?
Haystack fucked around with this message at 23:55 on Sep 21, 2014 |
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Sep 21, 2014 23:05
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Haystack posted:Oh, that reminds me. In the last tournament I noticed that my team revived upgrade points when they advanced to the third place bout. Was that the expected/desired behavior? We also got points when we won the same. I'm guessing that's not intended, at least.
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Sep 21, 2014 23:11
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Haystack posted:Oh, that reminds me. In the last tournament I noticed that my team revived upgrade points when they advanced to the third place bout. Was that the expected/desired behavior? Hmmm, that shouldn't be happening. I'll look into it. Ablative posted:We also got points when we won the same. I'm guessing that's not intended, at least. That's fine, since at that point it doesn't really matter anyway.
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Sep 21, 2014 23:15
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Jazzimus Prime posted:Hmmm, that shouldn't be happening. I'll look into it. Actually, this might be what I noticed Ablative posted:We also got points when we won the same. I'm guessing that's not intended, at least.
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Sep 21, 2014 23:56
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While we don't get points right now, the site does allow for a full respec between these rounds. Is that intentional?
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Sep 22, 2014 00:16
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Jazzimus Prime posted:I've PM'ed you a proposal that should make your guy more viable while still being fair. Let me know if you want to go with it. Just got home, and replied.
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Sep 22, 2014 00:26
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Bad Munki posted:While we don't get points right now, the site does allow for a full respec between these rounds. Is that intentional? I would assume not, since the only respec that SHOULD be going on is the special deal Frozen_flame is getting now.
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Sep 22, 2014 01:13
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Bad Munki posted:While we don't get points right now, the site does allow for a full respec between these rounds. Is that intentional? You actually can respec, but it isn't recommended, seeing as how you can't sell skills and can only sell weapons and armor for half their value. Frozen_flame posted:Just got home, and replied. Your fighter should be good to go.
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Sep 22, 2014 01:16
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Jazzimus Prime posted:You actually can respec, but it isn't recommended, seeing as how you can't sell skills and can only sell weapons and armor for half their value. Maybe I should respec Yeti Chan's leather pants into something else. Nude yeti incomin'
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Sep 22, 2014 06:17
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Test Tournament 2, Week 2, Match 1 On the left: The Kitten Appreciation Society! Their lineup is Neurion's Noserubbed the kobold, Tunicate's Charity the molemarian, Pickled Tink's Lumberelf the elf and Lorrdernie's Suns Out Guns Out the Troll. On the right: We're all Friends Here! Their lineup is Spoggerific's A Heart of Steel the dwarf, Frozen_Flame's Brother Boccob the dwarf, Maugrim's Rambold the kobold and Anta's Uselessly long cumbersome name the goblin. Brother Boccob has seen a slight skill reassessment so he should be giving us a better showing this time.  Brother Boccob opens things up by showing us how much he's improved: his shot flies beautifully true, directly across the arena without veering even slightly to the left or the right, directly at Charity.  I mean, he misses, but at least it wasn't way wide. A couple of tentative misses open us up as the melee commences. The first one to strike true is Noserubbed, whose iron dagger cracks open bone on A Heart of Steel's leg. Fighting a weird sense of deja vu he collapses, unable to stand but not yet out.  As Suns Out Guns Out lumbers to the front, he tries to squash Uselessly long cumbersome name, but the goblin parries it and responds with a strike to the troll's face... and his tusk goes flying. Meanwhile, Charity crams Heart's undamaged foot into his mouth, biting down until the dwarf passes out. It's looking bad for We're All Friends Here. Not only Heart is suffering. Rambold tries to go toe-to-toe with Lumberelf, and finds himself struck by axes instead. Only Uselessly is holding his own. Maybe Heart will manage to not die for a while, distracting Charity and Noserubbed as they work his limp form over.  Alas, it doesn't look it will matter much. The fearsome Lumberelf buries an axe in Uselessly long cumbersome name's pancreas. An elf would likely be out cold from that. A goblin, at least, is still on his feet... for the moment. Worse, Suns Out bears down on Rambold, ignoring the pinpricks of the kobold's short sword to hit him in the leg with his massive maul. Rambold's right thigh now resembles an undercooked strawberry pancake. Charity finally lets go of Heart's foot and gnaws on his head, instead. It's Noserubbed who deals the finishing blow, staving in the dwarf's head now that his skull has suffered multiple fractures. Suns Out and Lumberelf continue working over Rambold. The elf's hack drives him comatose, and the troll's maul flattens his weapon hand.  The shot of hope. Brother Boccob fires his second bolt. It strikes the giant troll Suns Out in the leg, breaking bone. Suns Out Guns Out considers his injury briefly, then faints dead away! There are now only three functioning fighters with The Kitten Appreciation Society. Charity has begun amusing herself by seeing what happens when you bend Rambold's joints in directions they are not meant to go, and this is keeping her out of other trouble. Lumberelf is dueling Uselessly. Noserubbed has been... er, staring at A Heart of Steel's body? Even in death, the dwarf is helping his teammates. Seriously, I don't know what the kobold is doing. His only injury is a bruised foot and he's standing around. Uselessly refuses to let his moment pass. The goblin darts away from Lumberelf and, in one sudden thrust, kills Suns Out Guns Out! Finally, Noserubbed rouses himself, and comes to join the game of "abuse Rambold as much as you can without killing him". His dagger finds the other kobold's stomach.  How is he not dead? Just beyond him, Uselessly's comeback tour has come to an abrupt end. Noserubbed's dagger slides into his upper leg, and that's the tipping point: he falls unconscious, as well. Two unconscious bodies and one dead one are all that stand between Brother Boccob and their tormentors. A moment later, the numbers reverse: Noserubbed stabs Uselessly long cumbersome name one final time and he passes on. In Charity's remorseless jaws, Rambold finally bleeds to death.  A third bolt flies from the east. It passes over the foe, but remind them of his presence. The three turn to find their new plaything.  Can miracles happen twice? This dwarf was always an archer second, with surprising staying power in melee. It was his lack of crossbowmanship that caused problems last time, not his defenses. Brother Boccob, determined to do better this time, finds himself in a new island of calm. The misses rack up as he avoids them without seeming to move.  Another bolt. This one bruises Noserubbed's organs. Noserubbed tries to charge the dwarf, but Boccob takes a step backwards and the kobold encounters only air. Two more steps back, and he looses a fifth bolt. It strikes Noserubbed, shattering his arm. In disbelief, the kobold briefly regards the dagger he's dropped, as his fingers will no longer hold onto it, then he falls on top of it. One down, two to go. Lumberelf steps up next. She's the only uninjured fighter on the field. She manags to ram Boccob, running him up against the arena wall. Boccob tries a zero-range shot against the elf laying prone in his square, but he misses same as he did last round. More dodging ensues, as Boccob dances away from them. In fury, the bestial Charity rushes the dwarf, but hits only Lumberelf.  Again the crossbow fires. Lumberelf is no longer spotless, as the bolt cripples her left leg. She falls over. Boccob's martial trance holds, but his luck does not. Lumberelf crawls after him, and hacks his leg in revenge. Like her, he falls to the ground, but he rolls away from Charity's snapping jaws. Can nothing stop him?  The crossbow speaks again. Charity finds it in her own leg, and slowly falls over. In this fight, no one has a leg to stand on any more. Not sorry.  Miracles pass. Brother Boccob feels his peerless wisdom fade. Has he done enough to let him finish off his three crippled foes, or will the two furies crawling remorselessly towards him finish him off? Lumberelf has an opinion on that: her axe crushes his throat. Gasping, choking, he collapses one final time. Brother Boccob is unusually well-armored for an archer, however. Neither iron axe nor mole teeth can find purchase against his bronze helmet. Hours pass before Lumberelf removes his head. 4-1 victory for The Kitten Appreciation Society over We're All Friends Here! Kills: Noserubbed - 2, Uselessly long cumbersome name - 1, Charity - 1, Lumberelf - 1 Combat log ZeeToo fucked around with this message at 18:58 on Sep 22, 2014 |
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Sep 22, 2014 07:51
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We're seeing a lot more martial trances this go around. Do you need to be facing four opponents to do one or something? Literally, my entire plan with Axel before was praying that he went into a trance and became a character from a Matrix movie.
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Sep 22, 2014 08:03
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Galick posted:We're seeing a lot more martial trances this go around. Do you need to be facing four opponents to do one or something? Literally, my entire plan with Axel before was praying that he went into a trance and became a character from a Matrix movie. Well, no, there were only three living foes when it happened here. I have no idea what the exact trigger is, but it can't just be "four enemies are attacking me". 
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Sep 22, 2014 08:07
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How do we keep winning?! I'm actually kind of shocked at how effective my build is being.
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Sep 22, 2014 08:11
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I used to think that I was a civilized person, who shunned blood sports. Now, I have to reassess my self-image. I think I understand the Romans and their enthusiasm for the arena a bit better.
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Sep 22, 2014 08:14
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Well hey. Now that Boccob's build is fixed, it's actually looking pretty inspired! A very impressive performance. Now if only his teammates (me) were better set up to support him...
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Sep 22, 2014 09:15
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| # ? May 30, 2024 23:21 |
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So this is what it feels like to be the richest dwarf.
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Sep 22, 2014 18:53
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