|
Jeffrey posted:I read it more as "you are sacrificing your future child's well-being by keeping them, and while it's a tradeoff that sucks to live through, the answer is still clear". Yall getting into rice and beans territory.
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 06:38
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 10, 2024 02:42 |
|
|
Veskit posted:Yall getting into rice and beans territory. Slowcooker + cats. 2birds1stone.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 06:40
|
|
|
Jeffrey posted:I read it more as "you are sacrificing your future child's well-being by keeping them, and while it's a tradeoff that sucks to live through, the answer is still clear". If it comes down to the pets or the kid, it's clear that the kid will win. The issue is more that the pets seem to be acquisitions right now and the mild neglect they're showing now is likely to be exacerbated. Unfortunately the animals that adapt to this the easiest are also the ones they're willing to give away (though oddly not to the humane society where they run the best chance of getting a wanted home rather than being offloaded as pets of inconvenience). It's entirely possible that suddenly upon being given the knowledge that dogs need exercise, KG and his wife will fulfill all their needs, step up and give daily exercise even with the added stress of a baby. But seriously, how obtuse do you have to be to think that 4 hours with a kennelmate in a run (which is effectively what the porch is) constitutes anything near an appropriate environment for a dog? And they're at least three dogs into dog ownership (2 current, 1 given to mom) - I don't buy it at all. Lip service will be paid, and they will go back to mild neglect and then wonder why a dog has housebreaking regressions or chews inappropriately. I mean, sure it could be worse - but this reminds me of the guy with a thread in PI with two golden littermates he shoved in the backyard and neglected for multiple years (while building more detailed containment systems) before he finally turned them into rescue. We all overestimate how much we're going to exercise our dogs or interact with our cats. I try to target 2-3 hours a day of active work with my healthy dogs and probably hit 1 hour minimum everyday. If you want a pet you just coexist with, get a fish. Engineer Lenk fucked around with this message at 15:51 on Sep 25, 2014 |
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 06:40
|
|
|
imabanana posted:People get super emotional about their pets. It's understandable. You do realize that the only part of what you wrote that Knyte will read and follow is "rent that house now".
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 10:42
|
|
|
Engineer Lenk posted:I mean, sure it could be worse - but this reminds me of the guy with a thread in PI with two golden littermates he shoved in the backyard and neglected for multiple years (while building more detailed containment systems) before he finally turned them into rescue. Don't forget the fact that he did all of this to make even more time for his WoW habit, going so far as to be playing WoW while his wife was in labor at the hospital and complaining about the WiFi (oh Wojtek). Pets: Look, if it was just a money thing I'd say keep them - as Slap pointed out the savings would just get washed away somewhere else. I really think, if they are having trouble now giving the proper level of care for five animals, it will be impossible with a baby. However, I suppose that can be assessed after the baby is born. House: I'm with April - all KG is going to see is "move now". But, like spending three months on a reduced budget to see if it's feasible to rent a more expensive place, it's worth three months to see if he can really make a go of a home business (read: more than one flaky customer) and thus make it worth it to have a bigger place so he can have a dedicated office. I don't know how long it's been, but I gather this side business has been on the books for at least a year and is still in the red (recall his staunch defense of the expense as it wasn't even bringing in enough money to cover expenses). Until then it's just another get-slightly-richer idea that will always remain a crutch (hey if we need more money I'll just pour more money/time into the business!) rather than a realistic goal to improve their situation.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 12:08
|
|
|
Aagar posted:Pets: Look, if it was just a money thing I'd say keep them - as Slap pointed out the savings would just get washed away somewhere else. I really think, if they are having trouble now giving the proper level of care for five animals, it will be impossible with a baby. However, I suppose that can be assessed after the baby is born. Engineer Lenk posted:If it comes down to the pets or the kid, it's clear that the kid will win. Okay, I'm going to try not to be a dick here, so just read these again, OP. I'm not telling you to give up your pets to save you money, I'm telling you to give up your pets because you are a bad pet owner, with a newborn on the way to boot. Even the most earnest of pet owners is going to neglect their animals for a little while after a baby is born, and you suck at owning pets. This isn't me being a dick, it's a fact, and if I'm being poo poo to you at all it's because I'm actually literally concerned about your kid and how you are going to provide for him/how prepared you are for him. People tell you not to "plan" because you get carried away with how great things will be in the nebulous future, so I have no idea how to teach you to be realistic. I suppose it's what everyone's said before: PLAN FOR THE WORST, HOPE FOR THE BEST. My husband and I make five times what you make, and we still agonize over purchases. We're moving to a bigger house across the country right now, and I'm planning to fill it up with cheap antiques I find on CL. That's how you get rich, not by pouring time and money into a home business that may never take off, but by frugality. You can make a million dollars a year and still be poor if you don't have a healthy fear of what could happen in the future, and shore yourself against it.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 12:52
|
|
|
I'm not going to harp on the pet stuff because that never goes well in BFC threads (as evidenced by the last few pages) but someone brought up a point and I want to follow up with a question. Knyte: From Nov 2013 (the OP of this thread) to now, how much have you spent on your business, and how much have you earned from your business? Second, how much time have you spent on your business? Another point: Knyteguy posted:Anyway before I digress too much I want to mention she put an offer on the table: if we can get out of debt, and also save $20,000 for a house, she will match us $20,000 Do you consider yourself any closer to this goal, now that nearly half of your time to achieve it has passed? lament.cfg fucked around with this message at 13:33 on Sep 25, 2014 |
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 13:29
|
|
. We have until the end of 2015, so 2 years.
|
Can we drop it on the pets? At one point we were taking them on 5-10k walks every single day, and if not that then free range mountain runs for a couple hours a day. We have 2 dogs not 3. Moving has us in a much more urban spot which makes it a little harder to exercise them. However we have committed to giving them 1 hour of exercise a day. I'm not going to say anything more on the dogs. I thought wrestling on the porch for a couple hours was enough for now. I have been corrected, and my dogs will be thankful for that. On another note: Here is what we decided how we are going to handle moving into a rental after careful consideration of everyone's input and our needs. And that's basically that we aren't going to decide yet. I am going to finish that book on business that I purchased and decide if I am ready to commit to such a large endeavor right now, or if it's something that I should hold off until things slow down. I of course would love to move into a nicer place, but there's been a recurring theme of us rushing into things. I don't think that waiting one month will change anything too much either way. Who knows a dream rental for cheap may pop up. So as much as I would really like to get a new place right this minute, I think its best to reevaluate after refining my business skills, and sticking to a new budget with a higher rental for a month at least. Thank you everyone for your input. On my phone so I can't hit more individual points at the moment.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 15:25
|
|
|
Knyteguy posted:I don't think that waiting one month will change anything too much either way. Who knows a dream rental for cheap may pop up. How did it go from three months to one month? I thought the plan was to see if you can stick to a budget, get a baseline going and see if moving is an option. I mean, your wife JUST posted about this, what changed? Either you guys changed your mind, forgot, or think that a month is enough time to figure this out? Janus Owl posted:I do agree with dropping it and not teasing ourselves with visuals of these houses until we know we can stick to the budget. Like my husband said, it is hard to resist the draw of moving when we're pricing the houses in the neighborhoods we like that have everything we want.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 15:56
|
|
|
Veskit posted:How did it go from three months to one month? I thought the plan was to see if you can stick to a budget, get a baseline going and see if moving is an option. I mean, your wife JUST posted about this, what changed? At least one month. There's been good arguments for moving now vs moving later on both sides, and so we talked about it again. We're not going to rush into something. We've only been at our place for 2 months, maybe 1 month from now we'll become enlightened and realize the answer is less stuff, or we can get a storage unit instead and I can move my desk into the second bedroom, or something. So basically the point is (and Veskit you were a huge proponent of this), we don't need to plan 3 months ahead right now, and we don't need to plan 6 months ahead right now, and we especially don't need to plan to 10 months ahead to July when our lease is up. I think this rule should be a little softer than we were taking it though, like it's OK for us to start saving a house down payment. We'll stick to reevaluating our situation in 30 days, and maybe reevaluating again after another 30 days, ad infinitum until we're ready. No hurry is what I'm saying. Even with a baby on the way. I can even start some of the business in our lovely situation (which I've already done).
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 16:13
|
|
|
Knyteguy posted:So basically the point is (and Veskit you were a huge proponent of this), we don't need to plan 3 months ahead right now, and we don't need to plan 6 months ahead right now, and we especially don't need to plan to 10 months ahead to July when our lease is up. I think this rule should be a little softer than we were taking it though, like it's OK for us to start saving a house down payment. We'll stick to reevaluating our situation in 30 days, and maybe reevaluating again after another 30 days, ad infinitum until we're ready. No hurry is what I'm saying. Even with a baby on the way. I can even start some of the business in our lovely situation (which I've already done). Everyone has been saying "don't plan ahead" because historically your version of planning ahead was something like "in three months I'll have $7,000 saved, so I can buy X now!". We are ALL on board with you saving for the future. We just don't want you counting chickens before they hatch.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 16:20
|
|
|
Knyteguy posted:maybe 1 month from now we'll become enlightened and realize the answer is less stuff, or we can get a storage unit instead and I can move my desk into the second bedroom, or something. This is really important. Chasing the latest gadget, or thinking you need "more" to be happy is a trap that many many people fall into. The entire US economy is built on selling people things they don't really need. Learn to do without things, to enjoy what you already have, and to find ways of being entertained for free or cheap. My wife and I like going on hikes and listening to live bands, for instance.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 16:22
|
|
|
Quantum Finger posted:I suppose it's what everyone's said before: PLAN FOR THE WORST, HOPE FOR THE BEST. Funnily enough I was reading about high income earners in that business book, and yea you're spot on. If you can't live on $40,000 a year you can't live on $400,000 a year, at least according to the author. I want to have a mix of frugality, and running a business to help us reach our goals. Both are important skills in life (to me). a worthy uhh posted:
 We'd have made more net money, but we (yes wife too) invested in trying out some new ventures, like starting a BBQ sauce company. Really one business venture that I think would be great to start, is getting a mobile BBQ pit and running a weekend mobile rib business. We saw this one girl in college doing it with a coffee business. She made coffee out of a trailer attached to her truck, and she'd go all around town selling gourmet coffee. I'd like to do the same for ribs, because I make a mean rack of ribs. We have some connections from my wife's previous jobs so we have places we could start going to on weekends. Not ready to invest the big $$$ to get a mobile BBQ pit though. Looking at at least $5k-$10k to start, plus recurring fees like insurance. Gonna need insurance for a food product. Inverse Icarus: yes let's cook the cats. They are pretty lazy bastards the world won't be much worse off.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 16:23
|
|
|
You forgot Part 2, "how much time". Because I'm willing to bet that the $150 in profit this year was not worth the time you spent. With a baby on the way you are going to have even less time to spend. Consider that deeply, because your time IS worth a lot. Can you work an extra hour a week at your day job and pull in a lot more than $150/yr extra? I'd bet yes. Can you spend an extra hour a week cleaning out your house and selling junk on Craigslist? I'd bet yes. I didn't realize that your "tiny" apartment is TWO bedrooms. That should be more than enough space for a couple. You have Too Much poo poo if you have an unusable room in your apartment. Straight talk: A mobile BBQ startup for someone with minimal cash, a nice chunk of debt, and a newborn is a pie-in-the-sky Bad Idea. Go read the Doobie's Dog House thread or something. You remind me a lot of my dad, who always had 'business ideas' and preferred to work for himself than a 9-to-5. Something finally stuck (he owns an auto shop now, but he is rich by no means), but when I was a kid we were broke and it was really lovely a lot of the time. You've got a newborn coming. Stability is really really important. Mom & baby shouldn't be grilling on the side of the highway on nights and weekends. I completely support entrepreneurship, I just think you're not even close to a safe place to try it. Keep the 9-to-5, kill your debt, stock up cash, and have a safety net in place for your family first. lament.cfg fucked around with this message at 16:35 on Sep 25, 2014 |
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 16:33
|
|
|
a worthy uhh posted:You forgot Part 2, "how much time". Because I'm willing to bet that the $150 in profit this year was not worth the time you spent. With a baby on the way you are going to have even less time to spend. Consider that deeply, because your time IS worth a lot. Can you work an extra hour a week at your day job and pull in a lot more than $150/yr extra? I'd bet yes. Can you spend an extra hour a week cleaning out your house and selling junk on Craigslist? I'd bet yes. I didn't realize that your "tiny" apartment is TWO bedrooms. That should be more than enough space for a couple. You have Too Much poo poo if you have an unusable room in your apartment. Day job is salary so I don't get to make extra money here. Freelancing takes far more than just doing the work - like finding the client, figuring out their needs, planning, etc. And then it can still pay like crap if you're doing it on freelancer or ewhatever. Selling my time for income is something I want to avoid, as my day job takes enough time as it is. Meh we'd probably have made close to $800 at this point if we didn't try to launch more things (but that's necessary for growth), and the time is nothing anymore. My client's $75/mo is passive income, and my microscope business takes ordering the product on a quick web form and marking it as shipped on eBay (I love me some drop shipping). If we could get 10 businesses up drop shipping products like my microscope business, we'd have some mean passive income. I don't trust manufacturers though so I don't know if drop shipping is a long term stable thing. And it's absurdly difficult to find the right product. Not to mention the websites I want to make which cost hardly anything. Not like I'm super active anymore anyway; might as well try to make some money with the skills I've picked up over the years. BBQ business on the back burner indefinitely at the moment. My wife wants to get into competitive rib cooking with me some time, but this may be when we're a lot older, or at least like you said just more secure. That's cool your dad got his auto shop business running, but yes I wouldn't want to burden my family.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 16:43
|
|
|
a worthy uhh posted:I completely support entrepreneurship, I just think you're not even close to a safe place to try it. Keep the 9-to-5, kill your debt, stock up cash, and have a safety net in place for your family first. JFC this, this, 1,000 times this. KG - I really wish you could understand how insane you sound to us. BBQ sauce? Mobile BBQ pit? You are in every sense not ready for a new business venture. And even if you somehow magically had the money it would not be worth the security of your growing family to have something like that potentially fail. Here's a real easy recipe for your next three months wrt this thread: 1. Come up with a budget and stick to it, 2. Do not come up with any business ideas, and, 3. Don't suggest any unnecessary spending on things you don't need. Done - you'll have the quietest, most agreeable thread until the new year. quote:Mom & baby shouldn't be grilling on the side of the highway on nights and weekends. New thread title spotted.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 16:46
|
|
|
every second that we're not
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 16:51
|
|
|
Knyteguy posted:one business venture that I think would be great to start, is getting a mobile BBQ pit and running a weekend mobile rib business. We saw this one girl in college doing it with a coffee business. She made coffee out of a trailer attached to her truck, and she'd go all around town selling gourmet coffee. I'd like to do the same for ribs, because I make a mean rack of ribs. We have some connections from my wife's previous jobs so we have places we could start going to on weekends.  On a more serious note, pretend I quoted this 100 times: a worthy uhh posted:I completely support entrepreneurship, I just think you're not even close to a safe place to try it. Keep the 9-to-5, kill your debt, stock up cash, and have a safety net in place for your family first.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 16:52
|
|
|
Knyteguy posted:Meh we'd probably have made close to $800 at this point if we didn't try to launch more things (but that's necessary for growth), and the time is nothing anymore. Put another way, you made $800 from your business but wasted $650 on get-rich-quick gambles. Branching out means expanding your current business, it doesn't mean buying a BBQ pit or Amway or any other completely unrelated scheme. I would treat that $75/month as normal income, and put all these pie-in-the-sky ideas down as discretionary expenses.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 17:10
|
|
|
Knyteguy posted:At least one month. There's been good arguments for moving now vs moving later on both sides, and so we talked about it again. We're not going to rush into something. We've only been at our place for 2 months, maybe 1 month from now we'll become enlightened and realize the answer is less stuff, or we can get a storage unit instead and I can move my desk into the second bedroom, or something. Month to month and I'm still a huge proponent of it. What I'm trying to say is moving in october is out of the loving question entirely, so just make general savings, stick to this months budget,  AND WHATEVER YOU DO DON'T TRY TO FIND A HOUSE DURING OCTOBER, AT ALL, DON'T EVEN DREAM OF IT. DON'T RESEARCH, DONT GO FOR QUOTES, DO NOTHING. If you find a good deal on a house I know you. You'll go HEY GUYS I FOUND A RENTAL WHAT DO YOU THINK, post a link, go afk for 2 hours to go sign all the paperwork and come back to a thread going what is wrong with you stop and you'll say i already signed the paper.You know that will happen, I know that will happen, don't loving do it. Jeffrey posted:every second that we're not
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 17:14
|
|
|
Just another random poster chiming in and throwing more ideas to sidetrack you KG, but I thought I may have a somewhat relevant viewpoint. My wife and I were dual income, with my wife making considerably more than me when we married. (2009 layoffs in the financial/insurance industry hurt me bad). We got married a little older at 29 and decided that if/when we had kids my wife would want to stay home. We started our marriage budgeting on my income which was very difficult especially in California. This long term goal of her not working helped frame everything from buying a house, to paying down debt, to taking a job in Texas, to paying off a house before we had twins two years after we got married. You need to look ahead more than 3 months to the next house, or the next videogame or next pet to see what you want your life to look like. Do you want to be dual income the rest of your life? Do you want to start your own businesses? Do you want to have 4 kids? If you get some long term goals, then the budget is just a function of reaching those goals. This is why people get so frustrated about you constantly changing the budget, or buying a ps4, or looking at new houses. Without a long term plan and goal, a budget is pretty worthless, and honestly if you and your wife agree on the long term goals, you won't want to change your budget every day because your long term goals don't change everyday. I would recommend the following (based on my life and Dave Ramsey) 1. Budget all living expenses off KG income ONLY 2. Save $10k for baby hospital and emergency fund 3. Get out of car debt 4. Get out of all debt 5. Move to a more reasonable house That should take a while, so as another poster said you could quickly have the most boring thread in BFC if you reached a plan and stuck to it. You have the income, and I think you have the will and tools, you just need to come to a decision and stick with it man. SpclKen fucked around with this message at 17:23 on Sep 25, 2014 |
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 17:21
|
|
|
in_cahoots posted:Put another way, you made $800 from your business but wasted $650 on get-rich-quick gambles. Branching out means expanding your current business, it doesn't mean buying a BBQ pit or Amway or any other completely unrelated scheme. I would treat that $75/month as normal income, and put all these pie-in-the-sky ideas down as discretionary expenses. We tried to expand our eBay shop into selling products on a main website. Had trouble getting traffic so we killed it. The BBQ sauce thing was like $50 - we decided it required too much to really get it going. In 2012 my business ventures pulled in around $9,800 net. I just really scaled it back when I got a day job. Edit: Just to be clear before everyone jumps on me, I'm not justifying starting a business with this post. It's just information. Don't y'all worry my day job takes priority, as does our budget. Anything I do business wise will be nearly invisible on the budget, as it has been since I've started this thread. I'm talking more about something like making a website for free as a hobby, for example. If it has ads, or affiliate links, then suddenly it's an income-generating free hobby. Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 17:31 on Sep 25, 2014 |
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 17:22
|
|
|
I think we posted at the same time, but I really want you to read my post because I think it is why a lot of people are getting frustrated. You just don't seem to have a long term plan and your budget should be a function of that. Right now it is just a spreadsheet and graphs you frequently manipulate with no real concrete long term plan (other than save for the birth).
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 17:31
|
|
|
Jeffrey posted:every second that we're not Knyteguy, if you haven't read the meat of the Tuyop thread yet you definitely need to put that on your short list. He struggled with the same issue you have of constantly coming up with the Latest Greatest Solution to All Financial Problems, but eventually he learned to see through that rosy haze of "new new oh my god something new!!!" and realized that there is no quick fix or get rich easy solution in life. As far as the business and what I posted previously... Knyteguy posted:
please give some serious thought to why you believe if you just Bought a Thing (paid more rent for a place with a private office) your side business(es) would take right off, despite having both a day job and a baby on the way.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 17:39
|
|
|
Knyteguy posted:Day job is salary so I don't get to make extra money here. Freelancing takes far more than just doing the work - like finding the client, figuring out their needs, planning, etc. And then it can still pay like crap if you're doing it on freelancer or ewhatever. Selling my time for income is something I want to avoid, as my day job takes enough time as it is.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 17:49
|
|
|
Veskit posted:Month to month and I'm still a huge proponent of it. What I'm trying to say is moving in october is out of the loving question entirely, so just make general savings, stick to this months budget, Alright, you bet. I'm willing to stick to this. I won't even pull up HotPads or look around the neighborhood.  SpclKen posted:Just another random poster chiming in and throwing more ideas to sidetrack you KG, but I thought I may have a somewhat relevant viewpoint. Thanks for you input SpclKen. You're right that we need to cement our long-term goals. My wife and I discussed them last night, but we still have some more discussing to go. Gonna hold off on another budget until we can get that figured. Still have 5 days left to solidify everything. Wife and I have been discussing if we should budget on just my income as not or well. Would be really cool to budget on just her income. I'll be sure to get back to everyone. strawberrymousse posted:Knyteguy, if you haven't read the meat of the Tuyop thread yet you definitely need to put that on your short list. He struggled with the same issue you have of constantly coming up with the Latest Greatest Solution to All Financial Problems, but eventually he learned to see through that rosy haze of "new new oh my god something new!!!" and realized that there is no quick fix or get rich easy solution in life. Hah well my stuff is more for fun at the moment. I don't know if my side business would take off, or not. I don't want to justify a new place only for business reasons, but it is something to add to the list of considerations, among a lot of other things. I've read a lot of Tuyop's thread, just a few pages to go. I don't think something like a BBQ business would fix our financial problems, especially not quickly. Cicero posted:I think the idea would be more that programmers can potentially make serious bank, and while your salary right now is perfectly decent, you have plenty of room to grow, so spending an extra hour or two a week learning new stuff or perfecting your skills could pay off bigtime. Agreed and good point. My boss who is basically a programmer makes around $300,000 a year, via consulting for enterprise clients. I'm going to try to start expanding a little more into .NET WPF, and I'm really interested in Python or Ruby as well. My wife works closing shifts every third weekend for both days, so that's usually the time I use to further my knowledge in our profession.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 18:10
|
|
|
Yes. Expand into .NET and python. And maybe Java. All right, I'm going to try to be helpful. I want you guys to sit down and write out, SEPARATELY, your goals. Don't talk to each other about them. Just write them out. Here's what you and Janus Owl need to figure out for yourselves: Where do I want to be in 6 months? (How do I want to be living in six months?) Where do I want to be in 1 year? (What kind of job do I want to have? What do I want my living situation to be? How do I see myself spending my evenings in a year's time?) ...In 5 years? ...In 10 years? ...After retirement? (Where do I want to live? What do I want to do in my spare time? Do I want to travel? Do I want to have a dream house?) What do I want to provide to our child/children? (the bare necessities? money for hobbies/sports/activities? money to get started in life, be it in college or straight into the working world? freedom from financial worry forever?) What crazy dream do I want to pursue? (go nuts) After you have figured out these things individually, discuss it with each other. Work toward a consensus, at least for the next five years. AND THEN. The hard part. After you know what you want, assume that you will NEVER EVER EVER make more money than you are making now. You will never make more than $4300 a month. That's it. For the rest of your life. Now make a plan to get what you want, at least for the next five years, with only that money available to you, and assume one emergency every six months. Ta-da. A budget. Strep Vote fucked around with this message at 20:54 on Sep 25, 2014 |
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 20:49
|
|
|
A mobile BBQ business is just buying a job. Finish the book. I somehow missed that you're a programmer? Why aren't you freelancing to get out of debt?
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 22:13
|
|
|
Knyteguy posted:If she's happy I can make myself be happy. It was as much my choice to have a kid, and the kid needs to be taken care of. No there's a fundamental disconnect here. It's not HER decision, it's both of your decisions and saying things like "as long as she's happy I can make myself happy" is such a load of bullshit. What that means is you'll end up resenting that fact later on. It might not be 6 months, a year, but you will if you are not 100% on board. You need to be honest with yourself and stop blowing sunshine and smoke up your own rear end. You've really done so well at that thus far. If's funny you THINK you have a clue of what's coming. You have absolutely none. Just out of curiosity, how can you have TWO preferred choices? Somehow I'm not thinking you are taking a truly good hard look at your budget and ways to minimize your expenditures. I thought that MAYBE somewhere along the lines you were starting to open your eyes about the gravity and reality of your situation, but I am seeing I might have given you too much credit. What I see here is someone who says "help help help, I'm having a budgetary crisis, I need your help. PLLEEEEEEASE HELP ME!" and when those of us who have been in that situation offer our time and ideas, we get "WEEEEEEELL but look at this shiny thing here!" or "That's too hard, not an option, not on the table, but I'll <Insert Knee Jerk reaction here>" Let the ship sink if you are not going to take this seriously and take the advice of people here. And just a side question, if you are not going to take the advice of people here, why did you ask in the first place? I guess I'm just a tad more of a realist than you and I have to be older. I guess with age comes experience and wisdom. EDIT: If I were in your shoes, every last expenditure in a month would be on the table and every single option would be weighed. I'll tell you this much, 3/4 of the people here who have given you advice or alternate paths to get your budget on track should get together and teach a financial "un-gently caress your life" seminar. EDIT II: You're a programmer? Christ if you develop software like you budget, I bet your software wouldn't pass any of the top 10 OWASP issues. Death From Above fucked around with this message at 23:18 on Sep 25, 2014 |
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 23:06
|
|
.
|
Quantum Finger posted:Yes. Expand into .NET and python. And maybe Java. Hey thanks for this, I like this strategy. Wife and I will talk this over tonight. imabanana posted:A mobile BBQ business is just buying a job. Finish the book. I do a little freelancing: http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3665466 Elance and Freelancer don't really pay enough because of all the overseas competition (people don't want to pay the rates that say enterprise clients or even medium sized businesses will), but I generally apply if I get invited to do some work on there. My experience is that there is more money is in finding freelance clients locally, and I just haven't found the time to do lately. Perhaps I should. Also yep on the book I picked it up again last night. Gonna finish it Sunday at the latest.
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 23:20
|
|
|
Death From Above posted:No there's a fundamental disconnect here. It's not HER decision, it's both of your decisions and saying things like "as long as she's happy I can make myself happy" is such a load of bullshit. What that means is you'll end up resenting that fact later on. It might not be 6 months, a year, but you will if you are not 100% on board. You need to be honest with yourself and stop blowing sunshine and smoke up your own rear end. You've really done so well at that thus far. If's funny you THINK you have a clue of what's coming. You have absolutely none. I do take a lot of advice here, and I don't think it's fair to say otherwise. Your wife for example recommended that we open some savings accounts for all of our rollover categories, and that is something we'll be implementing. Hell look at how many times I've changed our budget layout or spending plans since the thread started, and that's apparent. I'm still learning. However now that I realize that discretionary should rollover I'm feeling way, way more comfortable about proceeding. It's kind of hard to implement anything right now since it's the end of the month. Also like budgeting, learning to develop software has been a long process. I'm still learning, but I didn't know my rear end from my front when I first started, which is likely true of everyone. I do however take a lot of pride in my work, and I constantly try to improve my skills by being as pragmatic as possible. I make $63,000 a year doing it, so I must be doing something right. And yes security is constantly on my mind, my boss's mind, and the company's mind that I contract for. Everyone's software has security flaws as evidenced by that OpenSSL heartbleed whatever bug, but of course we do our best to prevent what is known, and try to limit any damage from what may be unknown (like encrypted data).
|
|
#
?
Sep 25, 2014 23:34
|
|
|
Knyteguy posted:I do a little freelancing: This is pretty clearly your path to getting out of debt - it's not more of a second job than what the book I recommended is talking about, but that's ok while you get your finances in order and gather capital to try something else. The money's out there, you pick it up, it's yours. You don't, I got no sympathy for you. /glengarry
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2014 00:09
|
|
|
Knyteguy posted:I do take a lot of advice here, and I don't think it's fair to say otherwise. Your wife for example recommended that we open some savings accounts for all of our rollover categories, and that is something we'll be implementing. Hell look at how many times I've changed our budget layout or spending plans since the thread started, and that's apparent. I'm still learning. Ok, I think I've finally located the disconnect here. KG - you need to understand this because I'm not 100% you do based on the quote above: 1. Creating savings accounts is not getting you closer to your goals. 2. Rewriting budgets is not getting you closer to your goals. 3. Taking all of the advice on how to organize your budget is not getting you closer to your goals. This is all cosmetic. This is all towards making it easier for you to follow a budget. You can take all of the advice regarding the cosmetics, and it ain't worth a lick if you don't follow through. What Death from Above is getting at is that when it comes to actually doing something, making some sacrifice that will get you to your goal, you are all excuses. Get rid of your pets? Off the table. Drop your failing business and spend that time towards something that will make you actual money? No can do. Stop thinking about moving to a more expensive place, buying a PS4, buying a washing machine that washes two pairs of pants at a time, hiring a dog trainer, buying a roadside mobile BBQ pit, etc. etc. ad infinitum? Only after we berate you for a couple of pages do you back down from buying these things that you think will make your life better but are diametrically opposed to your stated goals. If you cannot appreciate this distinction there is no hope. Also, Jeffrey posted:every second that we're not gave me a great laugh today.
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2014 00:35
|
|
|
Aagar posted:Ok, I think I've finally located the disconnect here. KG - you need to understand this because I'm not 100% you do based on the quote above: As far as actually doing something, is $2,000.00/mo averaged since July not something? We broke our budget by like 5% this month. No that's not OK, but it doesn't mean we're not making progress. Give credit where credit is due (and some of you have, which is appreciated). I think a lot of people have hit the nail on the head: in order for us to stick to budget we need some goals. Like not just this wish-washy stuff I keep writing down (including the next goal in this very post), but real genuine long-term goals. I feel like we're kind of directionless, and it makes it hard to stay on budget. Why the gently caress does one budget, except to meet their goals and setup a safety net (or if you're really hard off because you have to)? However I'm doing my best. If I wasn't I'd leave this thread in the dust. It's loving hard having every purchase I make scrutinized, people making jokes about our life, etc. For me this thread is a testament to my will to loving do this. Aside: Running a roadside BBQ pit is a pipe dream, and I feel like I already acknowledged that. I'm not going to go buy one. Just my pie-in-the sky dream. That's like on par with someone else saying they want to road trip the United States or wherever they're from when they get older. Consider my award winning rib cash stacking business a goal, instead of something that may get in the way of my goals. A goal for my golden age, or at least for when we have a house and we're stable, out of debt, doing well everywhere else, etc. A place where $5,000-$10,000 can be lost not frivolously, but without danger. Still on track to get the dog trainer though. That's coming out of our discretionary. imabanana posted:This is pretty clearly your path to getting out of debt - it's not more of a second job than what the book I recommended is talking about, but that's ok while you get your finances in order and gather capital to try something else. I might come up with a plan to do something like freelance to start putting money towards debt. Still going to finish the book before proceeding though.
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2014 01:21
|
|
|
Please look into selling/donating some of your clutter. Don't raise your kid to think it's normal for him to keep everything he owns. I was in a similar situation a few years back; we had a small house (800-ish square feet, 2 bedrooms) and it was mostly filled with sentimental items from our youth. My mom never did garage sales, so I still had most of my childhood toys, lots of Christmas ornaments, heirlooms from our grandparents, etc. Then we got a job offer in another city. We packed up all of our things, drove halfway across the country in the middle of winter... and someone stole our moving truck. We lost almost everything we owned. Think about your possessions like that. If you lost all of your stuff, all of it, what would you miss the most? If your house burned down, what would you really wish you'd been able to save? Take pictures of that stuff, scan in your old photos, and back up those files off-site. I had a 2 bedroom house and one whole room was basically full of books/old artwork/notebooks/computer parts. That was a huge waste of part of our mortgage payment. I don't miss any of those things. I don't miss the antique toy chest I used as a kid. I don't miss the couch or the TV, or the Wii or the PS3 games. I miss the photos. I miss the anniversary gifts and the sentimental jewelry. It's okay to let go of sentimental things. Take a picture, keep the things that matter the most, and get rid of the rest. Donate it if you aren't motivated to sell it on craigslist or eBay. Think about how much of your rent payment is actually spent on storing things you don't use. You should be able to live comfortably in a 2-bedroom apartment, and you need to establish healthy living habits for your son.
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2014 03:29
|
|
|
LoreOfSerpents I'll let me wife know you made a post and we'll go over it together. I think you make some good points. There's a couple things that would really affect me if they were lost, and I'm going to take pictures of them this weekend as a worst-case scenario memento. Our budget: pre:Income $4,700 Pre Tax Savings (e: not taken out of income) HSA 1367 Post Tax Savings Emergency savings 503 House savings 200 Moving savings 125 Pregnancy bills savings 100 * Hsa covering most of the pregnancy Car repairs 50 Holiday savings 50 Isaac fund 50 Car registration 30 Clothing 25 Vet bills savings 20 Vanguard investment savings 10 Her discretionary saving 0 * Rollover only His discretionary saving 0 * Rollover only Second car savings 0 * This is a within 5 years goal, so it'll be empty for a long time. --- Total 1163 Costs Rent 1200 Debt 710 Groceries 500 Pets 150 Fuel 130 Electricity 150 Car Insurance 100 Internet 50 Renters Insurance 20 Phone 19 Netflix 8 Medical 0 // HSA should cover all going forward --- Total 3037 Discretionary Her Discretioanry 250 His Discretioanry 250 --- Total 500 Money that is left in categories at the end of the month, or any extra income beyond what has been estimated will go into a savings account of our choice (non-discretionary). OK we spent a lot of time tonight and yesterday going over our goals, and our current and future ambitions, all the while considering everything that everyone has said and everything we've learned throughout the thread, and this budget is the result of what we drew up together. I wanted to drop my wife's income completely from the figure, but it would have meant either dropping some major savings, or dropping our discretionary to levels that we would really struggle with. I think that since there's been differing opinions on both sides, that we're safe to account for my wife's income at the moment. If we really lose her income, then well we'll just have to readjust the budget as that is a major life change. Our savings numbers may not match what everyone else's savings numbers are or what you would do in our situation, but I think it will really do us some good to see more than just our emergency savings go up, as April mentioned. All of the categories can technically substitute if necessary. I really feel like we hit it right with this budget, and I'd appreciate if everyone could kind of... hold off on suggesting anything beyond maybe questioning the values, or maybe we should add another savings account or something. Although we always appreciate new tips, we really put a lot of thought into this, and I think what we came up with is good for us. I also feel like we have all of the pieces to the puzzle now. The last one is just the discipline like everyone mentioned. I pray that I/we can do this. And I mean for more than just 1 or 2 months. I think I might finally understand budgeting guys  e: grammar/typo fixes e2: columns weren't adding up Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 06:26 on Sep 26, 2014 |
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2014 05:56
|
|
|
How does that add up? Like, costs + savings + discretionary should equal income but it doesn't. HSA is coming out before "Income" maybe?
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2014 06:17
|
|
|
I like the budget for the most part Knyte, I honestly do. There will be a couple nitpicky things that you can immediately correct and is more of a mindset change than a budgetory change. Pets in my mind are discretionary type spending. I'd categorize them as so. Clothes aren't really savings. I'd call them discretionary. Someone may argue for or against, but I'd call it discretionary along with pets. If you want to keep everything the same, I'd say cut back your and her spending by 50 bucks to match the pet/clothing spending categories and leave it good. I like it knyte as long as you can stick to this budget I think you're taking major strides. Edit: All assuming the numbers add up
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2014 06:19
|
|
|
slap me silly posted:How does that add up? Like, costs + savings + discretionary should equal income but it doesn't. HSA is coming out before "Income" maybe? Hang on you're getting $4,672/$4,700 in total right?. I'll just put that remaining $28 into a savings so there's no further confusion. Edit: I'm off by a couple tens here or something somehow.  I'll fix it now.
Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 06:22 on Sep 26, 2014 |
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2014 06:20
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 10, 2024 02:42 |
|
|
Veskit posted:Clothes aren't really savings. I'd call them discretionary. Someone may argue for or against, but I'd call it discretionary along with pets. Getting into details here, but me, I would argue against. (1) Clothes wear out and (2) their cost is strongly affected by your employment. Therefore you need to budget/save for them accordingly. And pets are essentially a fixed cost here because it's really low on the list of things he is personally willing to re-budget. loving hell, no more pet talk, sorry I mentioned it. NO MORE PET TALK, PEOPLE Oh! Regarding the ins and outs, yes HSA is coming out before the "Income" number and I get it now.
|
|
#
?
Sep 26, 2014 06:23
|
|