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Molentik
Apr 30, 2013

Ensign Expendable posted:




This is a StuG with a bunch of T-34 tracks welded to the front.

Plus it has concrete on the superstructure, thats why it looks so round!

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Retarted Pimple
Jun 2, 2002

Spacewolf posted:

They worked sometimes. Sometimes is the key word.

The biggest problem is that the jury-rigged armor did a number on everything else on the vehicle (including comms gear which is how I know much about this), which is one reason why the chain of command frowned upon the practice so heavily; Eventually, they rushed out the uparmored humvee to at least end the need to jury-rig armor (and improve the suspension and transmission and everything else that needed to be upgraded to handle the armor), with the MRAPs following very slowly behind. (It is absolutely true, however, that Rumsfeld and friends did not provide gear that everybody knew was going to be needed. They tried to do war at bargain prices. Hint: You get what you pay for.)

The secondary problem is that often times, jury-rigging armor reduces very necessary things like visibility, which makes you easier to attack.

The short of it is, they ban the practice for very good reasons, not the least of which is, if it doesn't work, you've screwed yourself.

The uparmored ones also were more likely to roll over during a turn or off angle, IIRC, goon Duck Farts broke his back and his gunner was killed when their uparmored hummv rolled over.

Slim Jim Pickens
Jan 16, 2012

Retarded Pimp posted:

The uparmored ones also were more likely to roll over during a turn or off angle, IIRC, goon Duck Farts broke his back and his gunner was killed when their uparmored hummv rolled over.

For a second I lost it because I thought you were claiming that uparmoured Shermans were rolling over, but now I'm curious about the possibilities.
Could a tank flip over without the aid of a high explosive?
Might there be a picture of a KV-2 or something lying on its turret in a ditch?

Yes.

ArchangeI
Jul 15, 2010

Hogge Wild posted:

I have never heard about it before, but it would make sense, because by 1632 less than one tenth of the 150000 man Swedish army was made up of native troops and not even all of them spoke Swedish. I haven't read much about the mercenaries contracted by the Swedish army, but they were mostly German with around 30000 Scots.

Could someone make a post why there were so many Scottish mercenaries around?

Probably the same reason there were so many Swiss mercenaries: agriculture in mountainous regions can only support so many people. Son 1 takes over the farm, Son 2 goes to the church, sons 3-27 need a place to stay.

Cyrano4747
Sep 25, 2006

Yes, I know I'm old, get off my fucking lawn so I can yell at these clouds.

Slim Jim Pickens posted:

For a second I lost it because I thought you were claiming that uparmoured Shermans were rolling over, but now I'm curious about the possibilities.
Could a tank flip over without the aid of a high explosive?

Oh hell yes. I've read accounts of even light tanks tipping over because ill-trained crews attempted to traverse hills sideways that were at just slightly too steep an incline. Add being unnaturally top-heavy to that and that's some bad news.

Terrifying Effigies
Oct 22, 2008

Problems look mighty small from 150 miles up.

There are a surprising number of pics with tanks in non-combat upside-down situations:

Goatse James Bond
Mar 28, 2010

If you see me posting please remind me that I have Charlie Work in the reports forum to do instead

HEY GAL posted:

Even more so, imo. Would you rather hear about some douche in a lace collar and the time he spent at court rubbing elbows with important people, or the continuing adventures of Hieronymus Sebastian Schutze?

I think you know the answer to that.

Trin Tragula
Apr 22, 2005

100 Years Ago

The BEF takes a pound of flesh at Langemarck and inadvertently starts a highly durable German propaganda myth about singing students. The situation is rapidly deteriorating all along the front. Back in Blighty, the government orders the arrest of all Germans, Austrians and Hungarians still in the country.

Morholt
Mar 18, 2006

Contrary to popular belief, tic-tac-toe isn't purely a game of chance.
What's a good book on the 30YW for a non-historian?

Power Khan
Aug 20, 2011

by Fritz the Horse

HEY GAL posted:

Edit: That review is fairly loving sweet in places:

:yotj:

Bewaffnete Landstreicher.

Kemper Boyd
Aug 6, 2007

no kings, no gods, no masters but a comfy chair and no socks

Morholt posted:

What's a good book on the 30YW for a non-historian?

I'd say Europe's Tragedy: A New History Of The Thirty Years War by Peter Wilson. If you know Swedish, Peter Englund's Ofredsår is pretty great.

HEY GUNS
Oct 11, 2012

FOPTIMUS PRIME

JaucheCharly posted:

Bewaffnete Landstreicher.
My Heavily Armed Craigslist Roommate

Morholt posted:

What's a good book on the 30YW for a non-historian?
Wilson's good, Wedgewood's good, you'll get confused halfway through no matter what you read. Not saying you're dumb, saying this is a thing that happens.

HEY GUNS fucked around with this message at 11:51 on Oct 23, 2014

Kemper Boyd
Aug 6, 2007

no kings, no gods, no masters but a comfy chair and no socks

HEY GAL posted:

Not saying you're dumb, saying this is a thing that happens.

I was reading a new book about the pre-1630 period of the war and about 150 pages in I no longer had any loving idea of what was going on.

HEY GUNS
Oct 11, 2012

FOPTIMUS PRIME

Kemper Boyd posted:

a new book about the pre-1630 period of the war
:q: Post it?

Edit: What's really confusing is the Italian Wars.

Edit 2:

GreyjoyBastard posted:

I think you know the answer to that.
Schutze would have had a lace collar as well, probably. It's in the job description that the flag dudes should be splendid-looking people, handsome and personable, since they're repping 24/7.

HEY GUNS fucked around with this message at 12:41 on Oct 23, 2014

Libluini
May 18, 2012

I gravitated towards the Greens, eventually even joining the party itself.

The Linke is a party I grudgingly accept exists, but I've learned enough about DDR-history I can't bring myself to trust a party that was once the SED, a party leading the corrupt state apparatus ...
Grimey Drawer

Kemper Boyd posted:

I'd say Europe's Tragedy: A New History Of The Thirty Years War by Peter Wilson. If you know Swedish, Peter Englund's Ofredsår is pretty great.

Or if you know German, because there's a translation by Wolfgang Butt. This is not a joke.

That said, trying to translate "Ofredsår" made Google translate claim this is an English word, which translates to "Ofredsår" in German, and I somehow doubt that. Is there a similar sounding English word confusing the language detection?

Kemper Boyd
Aug 6, 2007

no kings, no gods, no masters but a comfy chair and no socks

HEY GAL posted:

:q: Post it?

Olli Bäckström wrote this last year, called Polttolunnaat (i.e. Brandskatt or for the Swedish impaired, that thing where you shake people down for money so you don't loot their town): https://kirjat.finlit.fi/index.php?showitem=2611

Of course, it's only available in Finnish.

HEY GUNS
Oct 11, 2012

FOPTIMUS PRIME

Kemper Boyd posted:

Olli Bäckström wrote this last year, called Polttolunnaat (i.e. Brandskatt or for the Swedish impaired, that thing where you shake people down for money so you don't loot their town): https://kirjat.finlit.fi/index.php?showitem=2611
Oh, that thing. Brandschutz.

quote:

Of course, it's only available in Finnish.
God damnit.

Kemper Boyd
Aug 6, 2007

no kings, no gods, no masters but a comfy chair and no socks

HEY GAL posted:

God damnit.

I should probably see if I could get a grant to translate it.

gradenko_2000
Oct 5, 2010

HELL SERPENT
Lipstick Apathy

quote:




Those look like IRL versions of

Morholt
Mar 18, 2006

Contrary to popular belief, tic-tac-toe isn't purely a game of chance.

Kemper Boyd posted:

I'd say Europe's Tragedy: A New History Of The Thirty Years War by Peter Wilson. If you know Swedish, Peter Englund's Ofredsår is pretty great.
I do, thanks!

Libluini posted:

Or if you know German, because there's a translation by Wolfgang Butt. This is not a joke.

That said, trying to translate "Ofredsår" made Google translate claim this is an English word, which translates to "Ofredsår" in German, and I somehow doubt that. Is there a similar sounding English word confusing the language detection?
"Ofredsår" translates to "un-peace-years". Or "times of conflict", sort of. (And Verwüstung would be.. desertification?)

bewbies
Sep 23, 2003

Fun Shoe

ulmont posted:

I would have thought the last war the combat developers and acquisition strategists were thinking about was a long-term, wide area, counterinsurgency operation?

In the decade runup to OIF the three main scenarios combat developers used were Korea (which was heavy on counterfire and air-ground integration), Iraq II (mechanized offensive) and Somalia (small scale counterinsurgency and humanitarian relief).




Also I just discovered that MAXIMUM BATTLESHIP was a thing and now I'm all amused at the idea of a series of 80,000 ton dreadnoughts farting around between the wars and then being sunk by rickety carrier ships.

Seriously though those ships would have been just massive.


bewbies fucked around with this message at 14:42 on Oct 23, 2014

FAUXTON
Jun 2, 2005

spero che tu stia bene

Battleship/Dreadnought doctrine always struck me as the waterlogged version of whatever decision tree it was that brought us the Paris Gun.

Tekopo
Oct 24, 2008

When you see it, you'll shit yourself.


I dunno, Dreadnoughts did have their time, it was just very short due to the advent of the Aircraft Carrier. When Fisher came up with the Dreadnoughts the design was sound and it pretty much forced everyone else to match steps or find their navy completely obsolete (it did occur that on the creation of the first Dreadnought, many ships found themselves obsolete even before they finished being constructed).

I don't think this is comparable to something like the vanity piece that was the Paris Gun.

The Belgian
Oct 28, 2008

HEY GAL posted:

Brandschutz
What a great term

"nice village you got here, would be shame if something.. happened to it. This is a rough region, y'know."

Cyrano4747
Sep 25, 2006

Yes, I know I'm old, get off my fucking lawn so I can yell at these clouds.

The Belgian posted:

What a great term

"nice village you got here, would be shame if something.. happened to it. This is a rough region, y'know."

Don't think of it as paying protection money, more like adopting a mercenary company. Kind of like how if you have a bunch of feral cats constantly wrecking poo poo and killing your chickens adopting a stray Tom does wonders to calm poo poo down.

Only in this case instead of a kitty you're getting a bunch of drunk Germans prone to violence.

HEY GUNS
Oct 11, 2012

FOPTIMUS PRIME

Cyrano4747 posted:

Don't think of it as paying protection money, more like adopting a mercenary company.
söldnr is a disruptive new app that allows you to crowdsource military funding

HEY GUNS fucked around with this message at 22:38 on Oct 23, 2014

Tomn
Aug 23, 2007

And the angel said unto him
"Stop hitting yourself. Stop hitting yourself."
But lo he could not. For the angel was hitting him with his own hands

Cyrano4747 posted:

Don't think of it as paying protection money, more like adopting a mercenary company. Kind of like how if you have a bunch of feral cats constantly wrecking poo poo and killing your chickens adopting a stray Tom does wonders to calm poo poo down.

Only in this case instead of a kitty you're getting a bunch of drunk Germans prone to violence.

Ten out of ten veterinarians do not recommend neutering your drunk Germans, though if you absolutely have to neuter them it's probably best that they're drunk.

During the 30 Years War, were there any commanders who were actually capable of and willing to keep their troops from being a massive, brawling burden on whoever they were bunking with, or did they just universally shrug and say "What do you expect us to do about it?"

Come to that, was there some equivalent of Military Police during that time?

HEY GUNS
Oct 11, 2012

FOPTIMUS PRIME

Tomn posted:

During the 30 Years War, were there any commanders who were actually capable of and willing to keep their troops from being a massive, brawling burden on whoever they were bunking with, or did they just universally shrug and say "What do you expect us to do about it?"
Willing? Some of them don't give a poo poo, some of them want to but were unable. Some of them might have been able to rein these dudes in--the regiment I'm studying right now seems to have been well-administered, judging from the number of times people who do things like take a chalice from a church (he gave it back because his roommates said he should :kiddo:) get written up. But that's just a single regiment. In a really big army there's no way to keep order.

quote:

Come to that, was there some equivalent of Military Police during that time?
One Profoss per company, plus his assistants. One Regimentsprofoss per regiment. They administer physical punishments (except for execution--I did find out whether regiments have executioners and the answer is yes they do), involve themselves in court decisions, and detain people who are being detained.

HEY GUNS fucked around with this message at 17:16 on Oct 23, 2014

Power Khan
Aug 20, 2011

by Fritz the Horse

The Belgian posted:

What a great term

"nice village you got here, would be shame if something.. happened to it. This is a rough region, y'know."

Not even kidding. I think it was Crassus who made this businessmodel popular.

Nuclear Pizza
Feb 25, 2006

Morholt posted:

What's a good book on the 30YW for a non-historian?

I found Friedrich Schiller's History of the Thirty Years' War to be a fun read, although it's a bit dated. Still, could be useful as an introduction to the subject.

Tomn
Aug 23, 2007

And the angel said unto him
"Stop hitting yourself. Stop hitting yourself."
But lo he could not. For the angel was hitting him with his own hands

JaucheCharly posted:

Not even kidding. I think it was Crassus who made this businessmodel popular.

I thought Crassus's business model was more "Oh, hey, your house is on fire, good thing us firefighters are here! Only, this is a pretty risky profession, y'know, so would you mind if we asked for payment up front? The deed to your house would be a pretty good start..."

Hogge Wild
Aug 21, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
Pillbug

HEY GAL posted:

One Profoss per company, plus his assistants. One Regimentsprofoss per regiment. They administer physical punishments (except for execution--I did find out whether regiments have executioners and the answer is yes they do), involve themselves in court decisions, and detain people who are being detained.

Did the Regimental Executioner also torture and mutilate, or just execute? Did he have any other jobs, and did he have honour? Was he paid a salary or was he paid a fixed piece rate?

I have a coffee table book about medieval executioners (unfortunately not with me at the moment), and they got paid a fixed piece rate for their job. Eg. showing tools 2s, using breaking wheel 20s, hand amputation 10s etc. They were thought to be dirty and were hated and rejected by society. If they botched an execution they could be lynched by the enraged crowd. In some more peaceful places they didn't earn enough and were given other jobs like policing and taxing the whores and beggars.

Hogge Wild fucked around with this message at 18:17 on Oct 23, 2014

WoodrowSkillson
Feb 24, 2005

*Gestures at 60 years of Lions history*

Tomn posted:

I thought Crassus's business model was more "Oh, hey, your house is on fire, good thing us firefighters are here! Only, this is a pretty risky profession, y'know, so would you mind if we asked for payment up front? The deed to your house would be a pretty good start..."

All of the above really.

ulmont
Sep 15, 2010

IF I EVER MISS VOTING IN AN ELECTION (EVEN AMERICAN IDOL) ,OR HAVE UNPAID PARKING TICKETS, PLEASE TAKE AWAY MY FRANCHISE

bewbies posted:

In the decade runup to OIF the three main scenarios combat developers used were Korea (which was heavy on counterfire and air-ground integration), Iraq II (mechanized offensive) and Somalia (small scale counterinsurgency and humanitarian relief).

I'm mildly depressed but not surprised to read that. Seems like something fairly important and relevant happened in between the first two that might have been worth looking at...

Acebuckeye13
Nov 2, 2010
Ultra Carp

Cyrano4747 posted:

Oh hell yes. I've read accounts of even light tanks tipping over because ill-trained crews attempted to traverse hills sideways that were at just slightly too steep an incline. Add being unnaturally top-heavy to that and that's some bad news.

Dmitri Loza posted:

The Sherman had its weaknesses, the greatest of which was its high center of gravity. The tank frequently tipped over on its side, like a Matryoshka doll (a wooden stacking doll). But I am alive today thanks to this deficiency. We were fighting in Hungary in December 1944. I was leading the battalion and on a turn my driver-mechanic clipped a curb. My tank went over on its side. We were thrown around, of course, but we survived the experience. Meanwhile the other four of my tanks went ahead and drove into an ambush. They were all destroyed.

The Merry Marauder
Apr 4, 2009

"But she goes not abroad, in search of monsters to destroy. She is the well-wisher to the freedom and independence of all. She is the champion and vindicator only of her own."

ulmont posted:

I'm mildly depressed but not surprised to read that. Seems like something fairly important and relevant happened in between the first two that might have been worth looking at...

He means planning for a renewed conflict in Korea and Iraq. You may not remember the drumbeat to keep a military capable of fighting both wars at once.

Power Khan
Aug 20, 2011

by Fritz the Horse

Hogge Wild posted:

Did the Regimental Executioner also torture and mutilate, or just execute? Did he have any other jobs, and did he have honour? Was he paid a salary or was he paid a fixed piece rate?

I have a coffee table book about medieval executioners (unfortunately not with me at the moment), and they got paid a fixed piece rate for their job. Eg. showing tools 2s, using breaking wheel 20s, hand amputation 10s etc. They were thought to be dirty and were hated and rejected by society. If they botched an execution they could be lynched by the enraged crowd. In some more peaceful places they didn't earn enough and were given other jobs like policing and taxing the whores and beggars.



I have a book on popular criminal cases through the centuries in this city, which mentions similar stuff. Although, the executioners here had normal professions and did the killing and torturing for fun or extra money on the side. To mention the obvious, executions are held in a special place, there's huge spectacle going on, they have flyers where you can read what the delinquent ate in the last days, what he did in the cell, if he confessed etc. All kinds of great gestures, e.g. if you commited and be especially heinous crime and were to be broken through the wheel, you'd confess and be credibly repentant, the executioner will have mercy and strangle you, before he breaks your limbs with the wheel. It's almost like a sports event, where you have all kinds of dedicated snacks like Armesünderbrezen, Galgenbier and some kind of sausage that I forgot the name of. Whores going around offering special discounts, etc. Afterwards they rated how the delinquent performed, if the executioner did his job well. Just as you'd talk about a football game.

Just the kind of stuff that people liked to do before there was tv.

Power Khan fucked around with this message at 18:47 on Oct 23, 2014

Libluini
May 18, 2012

I gravitated towards the Greens, eventually even joining the party itself.

The Linke is a party I grudgingly accept exists, but I've learned enough about DDR-history I can't bring myself to trust a party that was once the SED, a party leading the corrupt state apparatus ...
Grimey Drawer

Morholt posted:

I do, thanks!

"Ofredsår" translates to "un-peace-years". Or "times of conflict", sort of. (And Verwüstung would be.. desertification?)

It's more like "devastation". You transform something into a wasteland by force.

Slim Jim Pickens
Jan 16, 2012

Acebuckeye13 posted:

The Sherman had its weaknesses, the greatest of which was its high center of gravity. The tank frequently tipped over on its side, like a Matryoshka doll (a wooden stacking doll). But I am alive today thanks to this deficiency. We were fighting in Hungary in December 1944. I was leading the battalion and on a turn my driver-mechanic clipped a curb. My tank went over on its side. We were thrown around, of course, but we survived the experience. Meanwhile the other four of my tanks went ahead and drove into an ambush. They were all destroyed.

Something about translated Russian is just so callous. "My tank flipped over, kinda nuts. The rest of the platoon died"

Like, whenever something bad happens when the army comes around, it's called an "excess", and it covers everything from robbery to genocide. There must be something that's being missed.

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HEY GUNS
Oct 11, 2012

FOPTIMUS PRIME

Slim Jim Pickens posted:

Like, whenever something bad happens when the army comes around, it's called an "excess", and it covers everything from robbery to genocide. There must be something that's being missed.
Haha, the people I read will say "Ungelegenheit." It means "inconvenience."

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