Stupid Music Shit

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Dewgy: Nov 10, 2005; ~🚚special delivery~📦

nah you're good

as thanks for your time enjoy more weird Chinese poo poo

kinda want to have someone figure out how to do a half assed relic job on it and heat it up to the point where you can stick bugs in it so it looks like a big chunk of amber

E:

Clitch posted:

Go to Hell, Dr. Faustus. I hope you go straight to Hell, and when you get there, they hand you a PRS, and on that PRS is a little scratch on the upper horn. Just a little one. Not even all the way through the clear. But you know what? It won't buff out. No matter what you do, that little scratch will endure, and stare up at you while you play for all eternity on an amp that will only produce the tone Santana used on Smooth.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 10:33

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# ? Jun 8, 2024 00:35

shiksa: Nov 9, 2009; i went to one of these wrestling shows and it was... honestly? frickin boring. i wanna see ricky! i want to see his gold chains and respect for the ftw lifestyle

Dewgy posted:

nah you're good

as thanks for your time enjoy more weird Chinese poo poo

kinda want to have someone figure out how to do a half assed relic job on it and heat it up to the point where you can stick bugs in it so it looks like a big chunk of amber

that would actually make a steinberger cool holy poo poo

# ? Oct 25, 2014 10:36

Dewgy: Nov 10, 2005; ~🚚special delivery~📦

looking at these is bad for my health

i want them all because i have awful awful taste

# ? Oct 25, 2014 10:48

Dr. Faustus: Feb 18, 2001; Grimey Drawer

Clitch posted:

You know, I was always willing to give you the benefit of the doubt.

You lie.

quote:

I grew up in the 80s. I heard a lot of hair metal. I soaked in the era of neon pink spandex and JEMs. I don't have to like these things, but I know the times, and I can understand a fondness for them. I could even look past your waffling serious/drunk/counter-troll posts, when someone made fun of your guitars.

But...

Tobacco burst is a hideous finish, and I just can't sit by while you say otherwise.

Go to Hell, Dr. Faustus. I hope you go straight to Hell, and when you get there, they hand you a PRS, and on that PRS is a little scratch on the upper horn. Just a little one. Not even all the way through the clear. But you know what? It won't buff out. No matter what you do, that little scratch will endure, and stare up at you while you play for all eternity on an amp that will only produce the tone Santana used on Smooth.

gently caress this noise,
A) I hate Carlos Santana. His playing makes Clapton's look like Jimi's on depressants, and if you know what I mean by that then you have forgiven me already.
B) I spent an ungodly amount of money of several guitars, the JEM77FP notwithstanding, but do you think that I, at 17 years old, treated it like some holy relic? gently caress no, I did not. I paid hard cash for it (go look up the price for it in 1989) and I beat it to poo poo. Why? Because I bought it to PLAY IT, not look at it. I actually paid about the same price for my RG770DX a couple years later.
And you know what? I played the gently caress out of them, to the point they got beaten to poo poo. Most of the "sunburst" around my JEM77FP is Sharpie Pen ink.

I don't mean I played these guitars in the bedroom at Mom and Dad's house. I mean we played in clubs and rehearsals where they got cracked and shredded.

So how about you go gently caress yourself with your "Blues Dad" memes when I was playing these guitars like they meant to be played 25 years ago, when I was playing Satriani and Rush and AOR rock and so much else?

You know NOTHING about what I've put these poor guitars through.

You know why I did it? Because I don't buy guitars to look good. I buy them to perform.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 10:55

BogDew: Jun 14, 2006; E:\FILES>quickfli clown.fli

I want to know if they're like all the bootleg Chinese toys and just randomly flash the LEDs as you strum.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 11:00

Hefty Leftist: Jun 26, 2011; "You know how vodka or whiskey are distilled multiple times to taste good? It's the same with shit. After being digested for the third time shit starts to taste reeeeeeaaaally yummy."

Dr. Faustus posted:

You lie.

gently caress this noise,
A) I hate Carlos Santana. His playing makes Clapton's look like Jimi's on depressants, and if you know what I mean by that then you have forgiven me already.
B) I spent an ungodly amount of money of several guitars, the JEM77FP notwithstanding, but do you think that I, at 17 years old, treated it like some holy relic? gently caress no, I did not. I paid hard cash for it (go look up the price for it in 1989) and I beat it to poo poo. Why? Because I bought it to PLAY IT, not look at it. I actually paid about the same price for my RG770DX a couple years later.
And you know what? I played the gently caress out of them, to the point they got beaten to poo poo. Most of the "sunburst" around my JEM77FP is Sharpie Pen ink.

I don't mean I played these guitars in the bedroom at Mom and Dad's house. I mean we played in clubs and rehearsals where they got cracked and shredded.

So how about you go gently caress yourself with your "Blues Dad" memes when I was playing these guitars like they meant to be played 25 years ago, when I was playing Satriani and Rush and AOR rock and so much else?

You know NOTHING about what I've put these poor guitars through.

You know why I did it? Because I don't buy guitars to look good. I buy them to perform.

you're a nerd

# ? Oct 25, 2014 11:00

Dr. Faustus: Feb 18, 2001; Grimey Drawer

ThePutty posted:

you're a nerd

Ouch.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 11:02

sigher: Apr 22, 2008; My guiding Moonlight...

Did we just go back in time? What the gently caress.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 11:06

Dr. Faustus: Feb 18, 2001; Grimey Drawer

Sire Oblivion posted:

Did we just go back in time? What the gently caress.

Only if you can't imagine what it was like trying to entertain a club 25 years ago before digital everything.
Yeah, you probably have no idea.
So, yes.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 11:11

Dirt: May 26, 2003

Clearly you are the only person in this entire thread who's ever played a live gig.

Please tell us more.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 11:14

Dr. Faustus: Feb 18, 2001; Grimey Drawer

I never said that.
Were you playing live gigs with no sequencers or samplers and live tube rigs in 1990? I'd love to talk about it, rather than fight about it.

Dirt posted:

Please tell us more.

I'd be happy to. What would you like to read about?

# ? Oct 25, 2014 11:17

Taffy Torpedo: Feb 2, 2008; ...Can we have the radio?

Godammit Faustus nobody cares, just let us laugh at dumb looking guitars in peace and stop trying to make this thread all about you.

Personally I like pink guitars because they are fun and also Murray the Red Wiggle had one.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 11:41

Dr. Faustus: Feb 18, 2001; Grimey Drawer

Stanfield posted:

Godammit Faustus nobody cares, just let us laugh at dumb looking guitars in peace and stop trying to make this thread all about you.

Personally I like pink guitars because they are fun and also Murray the Red Wiggle had one.

Fair enough.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 11:49

Spanish Manlove: Aug 31, 2008; HAILGAYSATAN

Dr. Faustus do you have a butt plug with a handle carved into it?

# ? Oct 25, 2014 11:56

El Estrago Bonito: Dec 17, 2010; Scout Finch Bitch

I love hair metal and I still think Ibanez made lovely looking guitars for the time. If you want a real classic metal superstrat why wouldn't you get a loving Soloist, ie the coolest superstrat? If you want an awesome 80's hair metal shredding guitar get a classic Fernandes because those are guitars with some loving chops. Plus Hide played the gaudy as gently caress Fernandes Burny and he was arguably one of the greatest metal guitarists of all time. And seriously that guitar is in the S class of guady 80's metal guitars.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Ja7H5_Kxu0&t=139s
Stare into the abyss of modified mockingbirds done in plexi.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 12:00

AchtungBaby: Dec 5, 2007

literally lol if somebody doesn't like japanese guitars and japanese metal.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 12:49

Barnaby Rudge: Jan 15, 2011; so your telling me you wasn't drunk or fucked up in anyway.when you had sex with me and that monkey; Soiled Meat

Cartoon posted:

OK Audio test time!

http://s000.tinyupload.com/?file_id=72010681966478746082

Here's the url of the file Test 1.7z

It contains four de-identified wav files. Your mission is to identify the one with the best tone and the one with the most sustain. If you think it is the same one as the best tone one say so!

The program is four open chords strummed down and left to ring out. Your answer is one of C, I, K or V

http://s000.tinyupload.com/?file_id=03283643843160444077

That's the url of the file Test 2.7z

It contains six de-identified wav files. Your mission is to identify the one with the best tone and the one with the most sustain. If you think it is the same as the best tone one say so!

The program is four open chords strummed down and left to ring out then a simple scale up and back. Your answer is one of D,E,J,M,S or Y

Notes

I could go into a bunch of stuff about the methodology but meh.
I would have used tindeck but tindeck was today, for me at least, fubar.
I have spent years researching 'tone' myths on the Internet and examined many claims in depth on another music forum. Happy to discuss.

Can't listen to any files as I'm on a lovely connection, but I'm going to quote this as it doesn't deserve to get buried under the KING OF THE THREAD craziness.

Stanfield posted:

Godammit Faustus nobody cares, just let us laugh at dumb looking guitars in peace and stop trying to make this thread all about you.

Personally I like pink guitars because they are fun and also Murray the Red Wiggle had one.

I was tempted to paint this Romanian Les Paul neon pink. I'll probably do this on another guitar, that paint is too vile to not use.

Barnaby Rudge fucked around with this message at 13:28 on Oct 25, 2014

# ? Oct 25, 2014 13:13

Clitch: Feb 26, 2002; I lived through
Donald Trump's presidency
and all I got was
this lousy virus

Dr. Faustus posted:

You lie.

gently caress this noise,
A) I hate Carlos Santana. His playing makes Clapton's look like Jimi's on depressants, and if you know what I mean by that then you have forgiven me already.
B) I spent an ungodly amount of money of several guitars, the JEM77FP notwithstanding, but do you think that I, at 17 years old, treated it like some holy relic? gently caress no, I did not. I paid hard cash for it (go look up the price for it in 1989) and I beat it to poo poo. Why? Because I bought it to PLAY IT, not look at it. I actually paid about the same price for my RG770DX a couple years later.
And you know what? I played the gently caress out of them, to the point they got beaten to poo poo. Most of the "sunburst" around my JEM77FP is Sharpie Pen ink.

I don't mean I played these guitars in the bedroom at Mom and Dad's house. I mean we played in clubs and rehearsals where they got cracked and shredded.

So how about you go gently caress yourself with your "Blues Dad" memes when I was playing these guitars like they meant to be played 25 years ago, when I was playing Satriani and Rush and AOR rock and so much else?

You know NOTHING about what I've put these poor guitars through.

You know why I did it? Because I don't buy guitars to look good. I buy them to perform.

That's why I called it HELL you utter tit! I wasn't describing Dr. Faustus' Fantasy Wank Camp For People Who Can't Shut The gently caress Up On The Internet.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 13:42

Oscar Romeo Romeo: Apr 16, 2010

How did the thread jump back in time six months? :psyduck:

# ? Oct 25, 2014 15:30

muike: Mar 16, 2011; ガチムチ　セブン

all it takes is one person completely devoid of self awareness

# ? Oct 25, 2014 15:32

Hollis Brownsound: Apr 2, 2009; by Lowtax

muike posted:

all it takes is one person completely devoid of self awareness

or any sense of humor

# ? Oct 25, 2014 15:35

muike: Mar 16, 2011; ガチムチ　セブン

Cartoon posted:

OK Audio test time!

http://s000.tinyupload.com/?file_id=72010681966478746082

Here's the url of the file Test 1.7z

It contains four de-identified wav files. Your mission is to identify the one with the best tone and the one with the most sustain. If you think it is the same one as the best tone one say so!

The program is four open chords strummed down and left to ring out. Your answer is one of C, I, K or V

http://s000.tinyupload.com/?file_id=03283643843160444077

That's the url of the file Test 2.7z

It contains six de-identified wav files. Your mission is to identify the one with the best tone and the one with the most sustain. If you think it is the same as the best tone one say so!

The program is four open chords strummed down and left to ring out then a simple scale up and back. Your answer is one of D,E,J,M,S or Y

Notes

I could go into a bunch of stuff about the methodology but meh.
I would have used tindeck but tindeck was today, for me at least, fubar.
I have spent years researching 'tone' myths on the Internet and examined many claims in depth on another music forum. Happy to discuss.

test 1: i don't care about the sustain but C and I sound identical and also the best to me

test 2: i liked E the most because it was super nasty snarly :twisted:

# ? Oct 25, 2014 15:38

muike: Mar 16, 2011; ガチムチ　セブン

dr faustus do not get upset when someone makes fun of one of your goofy guitars, even if you must use your ki or chi to do so, as i do when schlieren calls my guitars pointy even though i do not think they are that pointy and it hurts me in the feels. this is my advice. responding to me is not necessary and, indeed, advised against. take it into your being, your essence.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 15:45

Nostalgic Pushead: Jul 31, 2013; .

I've got a lot of catching up to do, but I've seen Dr. Faustus' name as the most recent poster in my followed threads page a bunch of times so roughly how many of the last, say, 700 posts are him whining?

Also here, have this. It's a memorial, apparently.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 15:47

Nostalgic Pushead: Jul 31, 2013; .

Dr. Faustus posted:

You lie.

gently caress this noise,
A) I hate Carlos Santana. His playing makes Clapton's look like Jimi's on depressants, and if you know what I mean by that then you have forgiven me already.
B) I spent an ungodly amount of money of several guitars, the JEM77FP notwithstanding, but do you think that I, at 17 years old, treated it like some holy relic? gently caress no, I did not. I paid hard cash for it (go look up the price for it in 1989) and I beat it to poo poo. Why? Because I bought it to PLAY IT, not look at it. I actually paid about the same price for my RG770DX a couple years later.
And you know what? I played the gently caress out of them, to the point they got beaten to poo poo. Most of the "sunburst" around my JEM77FP is Sharpie Pen ink.

I don't mean I played these guitars in the bedroom at Mom and Dad's house. I mean we played in clubs and rehearsals where they got cracked and shredded.

So how about you go gently caress yourself with your "Blues Dad" memes when I was playing these guitars like they meant to be played 25 years ago, when I was playing Satriani and Rush and AOR rock and so much else?

You know NOTHING about what I've put these poor guitars through.

You know why I did it? Because I don't buy guitars to look good. I buy them to perform.

Christ.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 15:49

Hefty Leftist: Jun 26, 2011; "You know how vodka or whiskey are distilled multiple times to taste good? It's the same with shit. After being digested for the third time shit starts to taste reeeeeeaaaally yummy."

i have a question about baritone guitars:

can you just take a baritone neck for the same brand and slap it on the regular model type, restring it and turn it baritone, or will this gently caress everything up

# ? Oct 25, 2014 15:52

muike: Mar 16, 2011; ガチムチ　セブン

if the neck is made to do that, you can. if it is not, noooooooo

warmoth makes baritone conversion necks for fender guitars. if it's not a fender, or you don't want a warmoth neck, i am without knowledge

# ? Oct 25, 2014 15:54

Hefty Leftist: Jun 26, 2011; "You know how vodka or whiskey are distilled multiple times to taste good? It's the same with shit. After being digested for the third time shit starts to taste reeeeeeaaaally yummy."

like say you had a jaguar and you had a baritone neck for a jaguar, could you switch those necks over? or do you need the very specific neck that's specific for your guitar or something

if not, what would gently caress up horribly?

# ? Oct 25, 2014 15:55

Nostalgic Pushead: Jul 31, 2013; .

ThePutty posted:

like say you had a jaguar and you had a baritone neck for a jaguar, could you switch those necks over? or do you need the very specific neck that's specific for your guitar or something

if not, what would gently caress up horribly?

If anything the bridge might be in the wrong place and therefore not intonate correcty, but honestly I don't know whether or not that would be the case.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 15:57

muike: Mar 16, 2011; ガチムチ　セブン

if you got a baritone CONVERSION neck for a jaguar it would work fine, but a non-conversion neck would cause the scale length to be hosed up and the frets would not be placed correctly

# ? Oct 25, 2014 15:57

Hefty Leftist: Jun 26, 2011; "You know how vodka or whiskey are distilled multiple times to taste good? It's the same with shit. After being digested for the third time shit starts to taste reeeeeeaaaally yummy."

okay i've got you, if i wanted to switch a guitar to baritone i'd need an actual conversion neck for it and not just a regular baritone neck

unless i wanted it to sound deliberately horrible :getin:

# ? Oct 25, 2014 16:00

Reer: Sep 27, 2007; by Ralp

Sleepflower posted:

I've got a lot of catching up to do, but I've seen Dr. Faustus' name as the most recent poster in my followed threads page a bunch of times so roughly how many of the last, say, 700 posts are him whining?

Also here, have this. It's a memorial, apparently.

rip guy. u may be dead but tophat guitarist meme guy lives on and can continue to make bank playing half assed guitar solos for a few minutes at a time at corporate gigs and football matches

# ? Oct 25, 2014 16:22

Dr. Faustus: Feb 18, 2001; Grimey Drawer

It's a beautiful Saturday morning here in Charlotte. I've done my tilting at windmills thing again and as usual it was a mistake.
This is me bowing out and being quiet.

I'll try to ignore the :siren:

Google Alerts :siren:

that tell me my name has come up in this thread where everybody hates me and I shouldn't post. I promise, I'll try.

VVV You got it! Congratulations! VVV

Dr. Faustus fucked around with this message at 16:51 on Oct 25, 2014

# ? Oct 25, 2014 16:28

Synonamess Botch: Jun 5, 2006; dicks are for my cat

this is me being quiet

:siren:

I'M BEING QUIET :siren:

just posting to say i'm not going to be posting anymore

(bye)

# ? Oct 25, 2014 16:41

Nostalgic Pushead: Jul 31, 2013; .

Dr. Faustus posted:

VVV You got it! Congratulations! VVV

You're unbelievably pathetic.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 16:55

Synonamess Botch: Jun 5, 2006; dicks are for my cat

Sleepflower posted:

You're unbelievably pathetic.

couldnt go ten minutes, lmao

# ? Oct 25, 2014 17:15

booshi: Aug 14, 2004; ||||||||||

Dr. Faustus posted:

I'll try to ignore the Google Alerts that tell me my name has come up in this thread where everybody hates me and I shouldn't post. I promise, I'll try.

People legitimately take the time to set up alerts when they are mentioned in threads? Holy poo poo.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 17:25

Dirt: May 26, 2003

Faustus and his terrible posting about his ugly guitars just killed Jack Bruce.

It should of been Clapton.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 18:36

Aoi-chan: Jul 28, 2003

Whenever I hear radio ads for the upcoming Joe Bonamossa concert, I think of you guys.

Also I thought "Schnecters" were just a product of trolling but I went in to my local GC recently and nope there was one in all its glory on the wall next to the cheap fenders.

Amazing.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 19:10

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# ? Jun 8, 2024 00:35

Spanish Manlove: Aug 31, 2008; HAILGAYSATAN

ThePutty posted:

i have a question about baritone guitars:

can you just take a baritone neck for the same brand and slap it on the regular model type, restring it and turn it baritone, or will this gently caress everything up

just buy some heavy gauge strings and tune down on a normal guitar, it sounds fine. I have two that I've done this to and I love both of them.

# ? Oct 25, 2014 19:46

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