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Woolie Wool posted:Star Wars is really a textbook example of how not to design a universe. Instead of themes, values, and tone, Star Wars is defined by recognizable (toyetic) images of things--particular ship designs, carbonite chambers, lightsabers, Stormtrooper armor. So everything gets endlessly recycled because a Star Wars without carbonite, TIE Fighters, lightsabers, and white plastic armor is "not Star Wars" because all Star Wars is is carbonite, TIE Fighters, lightsabers, and white plastic armor. Contrast Tolkien, who had the Númenoreans at the zenith of their glory gallivanting around in battleships that shoot missiles (it's described in flowery quasi-medieval language but he's clearly talking about steam or diesel powered ships that launch rockets at their targets) and Morgoth invading elven cities with armored personnel carriers, and it's not "not Tolkien" unless you only know Tolkien's mythos through the movies and call it the "LOTRverse" in which case you're a terrible person and should get mesothelioma and die. EDIT: Mr.Pibbleton posted:As I recall it just changes how much light side/darkside points you get. I don't think there's any way out of that encounter without a shift, but then again it's been years since I played that. Sombrerotron fucked around with this message at 17:16 on Dec 3, 2014 |
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Dec 3, 2014 17:07
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pentyne posted:I'm guessing this is a Karen Traviss quote. Actually, it was from a comic, I believe. A freighter accidentally stumbled upon Rothana's fleet of Acclamators and was destroyed before it could let the word out. Traviss's books don't really focus on Space Combat at all, except for one notable moment in Revelation. Traviss resurrected the craziest/worst aspects of the Kevin J Anderson novels and threw them all into a space battle over Fondor. Admiral crazy-as-gently caress-yet-incompetent-Daala shows up out of nowhere with a fleet of ships over a hundred years old, armed with super rail guns that shatter a ship's hull integrity with one hit regardless of shields. And then Mandalorians fly a concrete brick towards Jacen Solo's Star Destroyer and kneecap him before loving off to kill some Moffs. It was so absurd it was almost good.
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Dec 3, 2014 17:10
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actually ive always thought jedi werent nearly as cool as teh spaceships and blasters and what not luke was only really cool during the sarlacc battle tbh
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Dec 3, 2014 17:15
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satanic splash-back posted:lmao no that is just you, turbonerd Aw, shucks.  RE: Tolkien, I think steam powered elven whatever can work visually, like the Dwemer stuff from the Elder Scroll series. That could fit in a Tolkien setting.
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Dec 3, 2014 17:25
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Fetus Tree posted:actually ive always thought jedi werent nearly as cool as teh spaceships and blasters and what not They're probably a giant poo poo-pile along with the rest of the EU, but the only part of the EU that has a chance of holding up are the X-Wing books (and even then not all of them), because it's just "WW2 fighter jocks in space."
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Dec 3, 2014 17:27
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they need to make a jedi in the new trilogy a duelist that fights with a blaster and a saber at the same time. I really never under stood why they didn't have a blaster on hand how else are they going to easily kill a dude 100 meters away. Also you would think jedi's would pack a ton of grenades since they can use the force to make them go exactly where they want to.
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Dec 3, 2014 17:30
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TOILETLORD posted:they need to make a jedi in the new trilogy a duelist that fights with a blaster and a saber at the same time. I really never under stood why they didn't have a blaster on hand how else are they going to easily kill a dude 100 meters away.
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Dec 3, 2014 17:32
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I want a Jedi to grab a Yoda style baby saber and use it as a main gauche/parrying dagger.
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Dec 3, 2014 17:32
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Sombrerotron posted:The answer to this is that they are bona fide space samurai. except samurai loved their bows and arrows, and guns more than their swords. bushido was created in what the 1930's and all the samurai were essentially yakuza enforcers.
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Dec 3, 2014 17:34
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My favorite thing about Jedi is how they went from space Samurai with a few subtle mystical abilities in the original trilogy to Super Saiyan 9000's bursting with Goku Energy in the prequels. Two force users fight in OT: A slow paced yet intense duel ensues, with the victor using his swordmanship and cunning to win the day Two force users fight in prequels: the entire building is leveled and every expensive looking machine/furniture in a two kilometer radius is hurled by the combatants at each other.
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Dec 3, 2014 17:38
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TOILETLORD posted:except samurai loved their bows and arrows, and guns more than their swords. bushido was created in what the 1930's and all the samurai were essentially yakuza enforcers. Chomp8645 posted:My favorite thing about Jedi is how they went from space Samurai with a few subtle mystical abilities in the original trilogy to Super Saiyan 9000's bursting with Goku Energy in the prequels.
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Dec 3, 2014 17:47
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Chomp8645 posted:My favorite thing about Jedi is how they went from space Samurai with a few subtle mystical abilities in the original trilogy to Super Saiyan 9000's bursting with Goku Energy in the prequels. I'm not sure what was worse, yoda's fighting style in attack of the clones or having to fight against yoda in soul calibur 4
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Dec 3, 2014 17:51
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Sombrerotron posted:That is true, let me rephrase that: they are bona fide Kurosawa space-katana-wielding space samurai. One of the best has to be when Luke and leia beat clone palpatine and he EXPLODES with enough dark side energy to rapidly destroy the super star destroyer they were all on and yet Luke and leia both manage to escape unharmed. Even though they were literally standing next to him when he exploded.
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Dec 3, 2014 17:54
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i want a jedi with nun chuck shotgun gunblades attached by a light saber whip. It has to have at least 6 arms or 4 arms and 4 leg hands like a monkey.
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Dec 3, 2014 17:56
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The Force works in mysterious ways.
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Dec 3, 2014 17:56
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TOILETLORD posted:i want a jedi with nun chuck shotgun gunblades attached by a light saber whip. It has to have at least 6 arms or 4 arms and 4 leg hands like a monkey. I want a Jedi that creates a light-saber-bulb around him and just runs through things/people.
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Dec 3, 2014 17:59
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Seriously though KJA always gets poo poo for his ridiculous super weapon and force power escalations but I think dark empire has to take the cake. There have to be at least 10 varieties of super weapons spread out over volumes 1 and 2 and the Jedi and sith are basically minor gods
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Dec 3, 2014 18:01
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Aesop Poprock posted:Seriously though KJA always gets poo poo for his ridiculous super weapon and force power escalations but I think dark empire has to take the cake. There have to be at least 10 varieties of super weapons spread out over volumes 1 and 2 and the Jedi and sith are basically minor gods I think KJA worked on those comics too. Or at least the latter ones.
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Dec 3, 2014 18:07
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SirPhoebos posted:I think KJA worked on those comics too. Or at least the latter ones. Lol if I've gone this long without knowing that, but it does fit
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Dec 3, 2014 18:09
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Why is it that every star wars thread inevitably becomes a wall of unironic fanfiction under the guise of "fixing" the prequels Can't we just laugh at lightsabers and silly names without imitating the tryhard basement rapist internet movie man
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Dec 3, 2014 18:16
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writing fanfiction was below even basement rapist spastic colon tryhard man if i were to rewrite the prequels what i'd do is not make them, ever
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Dec 3, 2014 18:19
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tell me something funny that happened in the expanded universe like luke fell in love with a computer program or something?
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Dec 3, 2014 18:21
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does tripping the rift count as star wars EU since it had a sithlord clown in it?
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Dec 3, 2014 18:24
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Acne Rain posted:tell me something funny that happened in the expanded universe That happened, and then their computer lady came to life and they boned
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Dec 3, 2014 18:29
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Acne Rain posted:tell me something funny that happened in the expanded universe an xwing pilot for the rebellion pretended to be a pirate while also pretending to be an ewok by wearing a costume to fool some imperials/or other pirates i forget they were trying to gently caress over
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Dec 3, 2014 18:30
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Acne Rain posted:tell me something funny that happened in the expanded universe Also http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/The_Virtues_of_King_Han_Solo
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Dec 3, 2014 18:43
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Chomp8645 posted:My favorite thing about Jedi is how they went from space Samurai with a few subtle mystical abilities in the original trilogy to Super Saiyan 9000's bursting with Goku Energy in the prequels. vader uses the force to throw poo poo at luke in empire, palpatine uses force lightning without even bothering with a lightsaber in jedi, and the only two jedi we see fight in the OT are a washed up old dude and a kid with basically zero training
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Dec 3, 2014 18:53
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han solo and chewie also accidentally start a religion iirc E: tho tbh, thats legit hilarious to me
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Dec 3, 2014 18:58
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Fetus Tree posted:han solo and chewie also accidentally start a religion iirc g*nk
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Dec 3, 2014 19:00
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I CANNOT EJACULATE WITHOUT SEEING NATIVE AMERICANS BRUTALISED!
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Acne Rain posted:tell me something funny that happened in the expanded universe Top gun in space featuring an Ewok pilot
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Dec 3, 2014 19:01
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Sombrerotron posted:Having failed to kill Luke Skywalker outright, but succeeded in separating Luke's spirit from his body, ancient ghost Sith lord Exar Kun tries to finish the job by mind-controlling a bunch of jungle birds and making them peck at Luke's comatose body. Luke thwarts this cunning plan by in turn mind-controlling a toddler-aged Jacen Solo and making him wave his uncle's lightsaber around to scare off the birds. Oh wow. No wonder that kid turned out wrong.
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Dec 3, 2014 19:02
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Chill la Chill posted:Top gun in space featuring an Ewok pilot i already mentioned that one  also those books were fun as heck imo yub yub commander 
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Dec 3, 2014 19:02
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Are nuclear weapons ever mentioned in any capacity in the EU? I mean there would be far more powerful stuff I'm just curious
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Dec 3, 2014 19:04
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Holy poo poo, I thought I had found some bad stuff. This is the worst. Just the worst. In case people don't click through: "The Virtues of King Han Solo" was a song written by C-3PO during his attempts to aid Han Solo in his courtship of Leia Organa. C-3PO wrote at least fifteen verses for the song which he performed for the Solos in a voice that sounded much like that of popular singer Jukas Alim. The poetic song was meant to convince Organa of the virtues Solo possessed that would make him a worthy husband. Leia and Chewbacca did not like the song. An excerpt of the song: He's got his own planet, Although it's kind of wild. Wookiees love him. Women love him. He's got a winning smile! Though he may seem cool and cocky, He's more sensitive than he seems, Chorus: Han Solo, What a man! Solo. He's every Princess's dream!
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Dec 3, 2014 19:06
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a starwar betamax posted:wait... wait.... the clone troopers were numbered in the... millions??? yes obviously because a million is a large number so definitely enough to conquer back half the galaxy also the clone troopers are better than 98% of the general population so since 2% is very small that's definitely more than you could ever recruit as normal soldiers (maths is hard, right?)
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Dec 3, 2014 19:12
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Young Freud posted:Actually, it depends on which KOTOR play. In the first one, it's very obviously described as this, because the "Basilisk War Droid" actually appeared in the Dark Horse EU comics first before KOTOR...
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Dec 3, 2014 19:14
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what is a darksaber, is it a broken lightsaber like you turn it on and instead of a light blade black smoke comes out
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Dec 3, 2014 19:24
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Acne Rain posted:what is a darksaber, is it a broken lightsaber it's big black dick joke.
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Dec 3, 2014 19:25
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Acne Rain posted:what is a darksaber, is it a broken lightsaber It's a Death Star but a lightsaber instead of a ball.
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Dec 3, 2014 19:25
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Acne Rain posted:what is a darksaber, is it a broken lightsaber The Darksaber battlestation was a superweapon built by the crime lord Durga the Hutt in 12 ABY. A member of the Besadii kajidic, Durga wanted to use the superweapon to hold ransom entire planets and spread his influence throughout the galaxy. Based on the set of plans for the original Death Star battlestation stolen by Durga from the former Imperial Information Center on the galactic capital of Coruscant, the Darksaber was designed by the engineer Bevel Lemelisk, the creator of the Death Star and a number of other superweapons. Lemelisk adjusted the plans to the Hutt's wishes, removing all the Imperial padding and leaving only the central superlaser weapon, encased in a cylindrical durasteel shell. The resulting shape closely resembled that of the lightsaber, the traditional weapon of the Jedi Knights, so Lemelisk christened his creation accordingly: the Darksaber. Located in the Hoth asteroid field, the Darksaber Project, as it was also known, was financed by Orko SkyMine Asteroid Processing Corporation, a faux corporation owned by Durga. However, the construction of the superweapon was plagued with difficulties. The materials purchased from low-bid contractors were of poor quality; the computer cores provided by Durga's ally, Sulamar, were outdated; and the hive-minded Taurill species who assembled the Darksaber were often distracted, and, as a result, tended to make mistakes in the construction. As he witnessed that, Lemelisk started to lose faith in his project, but he continued with the work in fear of displeasing Durga, and construction on the Darksaber dragged to the closing stages. By that time, the New Republic became aware of Durga's superweapon and tracked his yacht to the Darksaber's construction site. A three-man commando team led by General Crix Madine was subsequently dispatched to sabotage the weapon and leave it adrift in space until a larger fleet could arrive to destroy it. The New Republic team failed in its mission, however, and two members of the team were killed, while Madine was captured and brought before Durga on the Darksaber's bridge, where he was executed as well. Just as Madine was shot by Durga, a New Republic strike force led by General Wedge Antilles arrived to engage the Darksaber. Certain that his weapon was fully functional, Durga commanded his crew to take it into the asteroid belt in order to evade pursuit, while Lemelisk, who was not so sure about the Darksaber's operational status, escaped. As Antilles's forces attacked the Darksaber, Durga took his weapon into the most dangerous part of the asteroid field, where the Darksaber's way was blocked by two massive asteroids. Durga tried to use the superlaser to clear the path, but the weapon did not work, and the Darksaber was crushed by the asteroids. Lemelisk was, in turn, captured by Antilles's forces, and, after a trial, was executed for war crimes. Edit: There was also a black lightsaber used by Mandalorians called the Darksaber. They fought Obi-Wan with it and then Darth Maul had it for a while: The Darksaber was an ancient, black-bladed lightsaber. Unlike most other lightsabers, the Darksaber's blade was nearly flat, thin, and curved to a point more typical of a metallic sword. The black core of the blade appeared to draw in all surrounding light and color, leaving a faint white, electrical aura along its edges, it hummed with a higher-pitched whine than its more common lightsaber counterparts when the blade was active, and made a sound like a whistle when it was swung. Once held by the Jedi Order, during a period of collapse in the Galactic Republic's power, the Darksaber was stolen by members of the Mandalorian warrior clans. Over time, the black lightsaber was passed down through generations of the Vizsla clan, and when Tor Vizsla founded the radical Mandalorian splinter group known as the Death Watch, he chose the Darksaber as the symbol of his authority as the sect's Secret Mandalore. Upon Tor Vizsla's death, the ancient blade was entrusted to his clan kinsman Pre Vizsla, the current leader of Death Watch, and reigned as the Secret Mandalore well into the pan-galactic Clone Wars. Early in the war, the Darksaber was brought against the Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi in a duel on Mandalore's moon, Concordia. Though Vizsla's skill with the black blade was such that he could fight evenly with Kenobi for a time, the ancient lightsaber could not defend Vizsla from the Jedi Master's Force powers. Only the timely intervention of Vizsla's Death Watch troops ensured their leader's victory by forcing Kenobi to retreat. After Death Watch was banished from the Mandalore system, Vizsla led his people to the planet Carlac. There, the Death Watch leader came into conflict with the Jedi Padawan Ahsoka Tano whom Vizsla attempted to kill with the Darksaber. After a short but heated bout, the young Jedi fled from Vizsla, and escaped the world with her life. In 20 BBY, Vizsla led the Death Watch into an alliance with the Sith Lords Darth Maul and Savage Opress, assembling a criminal army with which they were able to bring down the leaders of the pacifistic New Mandalorians. When Vizsla betrayed the Sith in the wake of their victory, Maul challenged the Mandalorian soldier to single combat for leadership, and upon killing Vizsla after a fierce struggle, Maul claimed the Darksaber as his own, and with it leadership over Death Watch. Only weeks later, Maul was forced to use the Darksaber in a duel against his former master, the Dark Lord of the Sith Darth Sidious, who sought to bring the renegade Sith Lord back under his control. Despite wielding the Darksaber alongside his own red-bladed lightsaber, Maul was defeated and subdued by Sidious. gohuskies fucked around with this message at 19:29 on Dec 3, 2014 |
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Dec 3, 2014 19:26
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