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Boris Galerkin posted:I still don't understand and I don't want to look it up If butts were vacuums and went on sucking-people-up rampages instead of expelling things as they normally do
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Dec 5, 2014 02:03
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| # ? May 27, 2024 06:45 |
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Boris Galerkin posted:I still don't understand and I don't want to look it up Trust your instincts.
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Dec 5, 2014 02:41
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I really want to post a heap of examples in here, but I know this person is a goon... Goddammit internet.
Maximum Sexy Pigeon has a new favorite as of 05:24 on Dec 5, 2014 |
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Dec 5, 2014 05:21
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Fathis Munk posted:While we're on the subject of assholes getting cranked to 11 I wish I could believe this as STDH but it's one where I knew someone with a fetish and he treated it like a loving way of life. Basically he was into making GBS threads himself and everyone, loving EVERYONE around him HAD to know it, including his boyfriend, friends and even his loving parents too. His parents didn't even discourage it, gently caress, they'd wash his poo poo-in underwear for him  . He would get righteously offended too if anyone told him to keep it to himself because he literally did not understand that was something pretty much nobody else wanted to be around when he did. I'm glad that I haven't seen this person for years now and I know that he lives several states away.I know, I know, "source your quotes" but people out there are genuinely that hosed up and have that little awareness of other people I could see this basically happening as written.
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Dec 5, 2014 05:29
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Dec 5, 2014 05:45
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Ah yes that old dude who's name is The White House, I know him.
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Dec 5, 2014 06:03
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Hahah they even forged Barack Obama's signature on the bottom (or put a JPEG in the word file become they printed it).
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Dec 5, 2014 06:10
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They had to write "h*ck" because Obama couldn't swear
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Dec 5, 2014 06:45
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Postscripts are supposed to go after the signature. C'mon, dude.
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Dec 5, 2014 07:21
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It's like he spent all his mental energy going "don't forget to fold it, people will say it's fake, don't forget to fold it!" and then didn't have enough brain power left to attend to any other aspect.
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Dec 5, 2014 08:57
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That writing style is really grating.
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Dec 5, 2014 11:42
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"Hello, Husband, it is me your wife" - wife http://imgur.com/gallery/QoN8G
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Dec 5, 2014 14:24
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EmmyOk posted:"Hello, Husband, it is me your wife" I buy this as legit. I mean, he wrote the note himself because an anime body pillow can't write, but I'm sure he thinks he's married to it.
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Dec 5, 2014 15:16
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EmmyOk posted:"Hello, Husband, it is me your wife" None of that is hard to believe though...
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Dec 5, 2014 16:59
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david... posted:None of that is hard to believe though... I agree, at the risk of sounding like a dork I admit I do things like this for my husband all the time. But thankfully he doesn't take pictures and brag about it on imgur for e-cred.
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Dec 5, 2014 18:10
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Do you address it to 'Husband'?
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Dec 5, 2014 18:13
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I could go and get several cards and envelopes my girlfriend has given me that say 'boyfriend' on them
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Dec 5, 2014 18:14
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I call my husband 'Husband' sometimes, though I don't leave notes often, so I've never addressed one that way.
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Dec 5, 2014 18:16
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Praseodymi posted:Do you address it to 'Husband'? 
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Dec 5, 2014 18:17
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Nah but he calls me Wife sometimes and occasionally writes it in notes/texts, I find it kind of endearing 
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Dec 5, 2014 18:21
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 It just sounds really weird to me. Probably since I saw a civil war re-enactor doing it to his wife.E: English civil war.
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Dec 5, 2014 18:24
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epopt posted:Nah but he calls me Wife sometimes and occasionally writes it in notes/texts, I find it kind of endearing My wife and I sometimes call each other "Huzz-bond" and "wieef" like Hermes and LaBarbara. But we're not gross enough to write that on the outside of an envelope where people might see
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Dec 5, 2014 18:24
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epopt posted:Nah but he calls me Wife sometimes and occasionally writes it in notes/texts, I find it kind of endearing Is he drunk, he drunk, the silly old fool?
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Dec 5, 2014 18:24
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it's just dumb couple stuff, the only thing that really makes it dubious is that he posted it, like how when somebody is lying they often add too much info or feel the need to say it at all
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Dec 5, 2014 18:27
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I guess the really sad part is that so many people up voted the picture thinking it was something amazing and noteworthy, instead of a standard thing that anyone would do for their partner having a bad day. And that this present made him CRY. I mean come on.
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Dec 5, 2014 18:34
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LMFAO if you're not totally formal with your spouse at all times
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Dec 5, 2014 18:42
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Speaking of dumb couple stuff, this popped up in my facebook feed recently on the page of someone I don't know very well, detailing how she recently got engaged. I really hope it's stdh because it's creepy (and lame) as gently caress. The way it's written I gathered is because she copied it from their wedding website which she posted a link to, which I didn't bother clicking. The whole idea of a website dedicated to your engagement/wedding is odd to me anyway. "Last March, when Ashley was working at Victoria's Secret, Jordan surpised her(without her seeing him) and dropped off a dozen roses, Fanny May chocolates, chocolate covered strawberries, Godiva chocolate covered caramels, a bracelet, and a card that had a poem in it. At the end of the poem, it requested that she go to the spa after work. When Ashley went to the spa, she was informed that she had a massage then manicure/pedicure waiting for her! She also had another dozen roses waiting for her and Fanny May gummi bears. The ladies at the spa asked her if it was her birthday, she just smiled and said, "No, but a very special day." When Ashley returned home from the spa, she was surprised once more coming home to flower petals leading to her bed where she found her favorite bottle of wine and a video of Jordan reciting a poem to her! At the end of the video, Jordan said to turn around. As she turned around Jordan came out of her closet with the ring box in hand. He got on one knee and asked her if she would marry him. Overexcited with joy and tears of happiness, Ashley said YES ! " Seems a bit over the top to me, or maybe this is super romantic and I'm a bitter old crone. Plus they don't live together so the closet thing is creepy. Also, how much candy do you need to give a girl?
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Dec 5, 2014 18:43
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epopt posted:Speaking of dumb couple stuff, this popped up in my facebook feed recently on the page of someone I don't know very well, detailing how she recently got engaged. I really hope it's stdh because it's creepy (and lame) as gently caress. The way it's written I gathered is because she copied it from their wedding website which she posted a link to, which I didn't bother clicking. The whole idea of a website dedicated to your engagement/wedding is odd to me anyway. This sounds more like asking a teenager to prom than asking a Grown-rear end Adult to marry you. Also the main point of wedding websites is to link to online registries and also to collect RSVPs so people don't have to mail back their responses
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Dec 5, 2014 18:56
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That story reminded me of a bizarre story on Reddit where some dude rhapsodized about bathing his girlfriend and serving her a tray of gourmet cold cuts and cheeses in the tub.
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Dec 5, 2014 18:56
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ibntumart posted:That story reminded me of a bizarre story on Reddit where some dude rhapsodized about bathing his girlfriend and serving her a tray of gourmet cold cuts and cheeses in the tub.  Got a link by chance?
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Dec 5, 2014 19:03
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Was that dude Smoove B from the Onion?
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Dec 5, 2014 19:06
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epopt posted:
I found it. For context, this was in response to someone asking how to thank his SO for a thoughtful striptease. quote:Dude here, but got some advice on this.
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Dec 5, 2014 19:26
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ibntumart posted:I found it. For context, this was in response to someone asking how to thank his SO for a thoughtful striptease. If my guy was like monitoring me and drying me off every step of the bath it would feel less romantic and relaxing and more like I was in a special care facility
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Dec 5, 2014 19:38
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sweeperbravo posted:If my guy was like monitoring me and drying me off every step of the bath it would feel less romantic and relaxing and more like I was in a special care facility But what if that's someones fetish?
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Dec 5, 2014 19:40
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Tracula posted:But what if that's someones fetish? I would say it's pretty clearly that Redditor's fetish. That was the most clinical romantic bubblebath I've ever read about, and I've read about my fair share of bubblebaths. Wait there were actually 2 bubblebaths in that post.
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Dec 5, 2014 19:43
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sweeperbravo posted:If my guy was like monitoring me and drying me off every step of the bath it would feel less romantic and relaxing and more like I was in a special care facility It starts kinda romantic but quickly gets so extremely over-specific that he sounds like he's describing how he handles his sex doll, not a real woman.
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Dec 5, 2014 19:46
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Zaphod42 posted:It starts kinda romantic but quickly gets so extremely over-specific that he sounds like he's describing how he handles his sex doll, not a real woman. That was my thought as well, especially the part about "You want to put her back in the tub again to wash the oils off". It just sounds... triplexpac nailed it, it's the most clinically romantic description of being romantic I've ever read. I wonder if the author has ever had a girlfriend.
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Dec 5, 2014 19:58
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quote:First, make sure you clean and rinse the tub really good. This is important, and make sure you tell her you cleaned it well. Then fill it with full hot water first to heat up the tub itself. Leave it for a few minutes, then drain. Now when you refill it with water, it will be lukewarm because you used up all the hot water warming the drat tub.
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Dec 5, 2014 20:02
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david... posted:I could go and get several cards and envelopes my girlfriend has given me that say 'boyfriend' on them She does that so she can reuse them if you break up before she gives them to you. Life hack!
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Dec 5, 2014 20:03
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Bobby Digital posted:She does that so she can reuse them if you break up before she gives them to you. Life hack! 
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Dec 5, 2014 20:05
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