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Pondex posted:All that theorycrafting about the kessel-run just goes to show how amazingly tonedeaf nerds generally are. That whole scene is Han Solo conning Obi-Wan and Luke out of their money because he's clocked them as a couple of rubes. Which they are. An old man who hasn't been off the planet in 25 years and a kid who's never set foot in a bar before. That sounds pretty much right, but earlier in the movie, C-3PO does mention getting smashed into who knows what in the spice mines of Kessel 
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Dec 15, 2014 22:14
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Pondex posted:Being a smuggler-ship, it stands to reason that it is. It's not a fast, reliable ship though. Agreed, there is certainly a distinction
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Dec 15, 2014 22:19
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Otisburg posted:no, you see thrawn did not have the power of battle meditation himself, he employed the services of the clone dark jedi joruus cibath, being sure to keep a bunch of force-voiding space weasels around him at all time (not the kind han solo made love to, a different kind of space weasel) as a hedge should joruus turn on him From a few pages back, but this is easily the most EU sentence I've ever read. It features a character not in the movies using the secret ultra-powerful Force abilities of a clone of a character not in the movies and using anti-Force powers from a creature not mentioned in the movies that is different from a similar creature Han Solo hosed, and it all takes place inside of a scene in Return of the Jedi. This is peak EU.
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Dec 15, 2014 22:57
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You see, with the idea of hyperspace, you can boast of making a run in less parsecs, meaning you found a way to get to the destination via a shorter distance. One assumes this means traveling close to a star or a black hole or something dangerous - a route most people wouldn't take.
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Dec 15, 2014 23:02
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Like you could be watching any scene in Star Wars and if the camera moved like one room over you're going to have Boba Fett's Jedi clone fighting Darth Vader's secret apprentice and the little bat guy from the cantina for the fate of the galaxy
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Dec 15, 2014 23:02
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Otisburg posted:no, you see thrawn did not have the power of battle meditation himself, he employed the services of the clone dark jedi joruus cibath, being sure to keep a bunch of force-voiding space weasels around him at all time (not the kind han solo made love to, a different kind of space weasel) as a hedge should joruus turn on him han solo hosed a weasel?
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Dec 15, 2014 23:05
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That monster that grabs Luke in the trash compactor wasn't just some random creature, it was Ancient Jedi Master Striss Goblai, and as soon as he grabbed Luke's leg he realized that he was holding the fate of the galaxy in his tentacle and released him, and also he trained Yoda
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Dec 15, 2014 23:05
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Wolfsheim posted:From a few pages back, but this is easily the most EU sentence I've ever read. It features a character not in the movies using the secret ultra-powerful Force abilities of a clone of a character not in the movies and using anti-Force powers from a creature not mentioned in the movies that is different from a similar creature Han Solo hosed, and it all takes place inside of a scene in Return of the Jedi. This is peak EU. Not to defend poo poo writing but they're more like fat iguanas with fur, http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Ysalamir, while the thing Han Solo hosed was a bipedal otter. The EU is at the same conceptual level as children claiming they have whatever will trump whatever the other kid has while playing laser fights or some other make believe game.
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Dec 15, 2014 23:16
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Wolfsheim posted:Like you could be watching any scene in Star Wars and if the camera moved like one room over you're going to have Boba Fett's Jedi clone fighting Darth Vader's secret apprentice and the little bat guy from the cantina for the fate of the galaxy
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Dec 15, 2014 23:22
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Best part of the Clone Wars series was the episode where they showed us a clone deserter. Upped and left when his squad were killed, adopted a family and became a farmer. Have a bit more depth to the potential for what the clones can do. Naturally, his clone colleagues were outraged.
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Dec 15, 2014 23:29
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Wolfsheim posted:That monster that grabs Luke in the trash compactor wasn't just some random creature, it was Ancient Jedi Master Striss Goblai, and as soon as he grabbed Luke's leg he realized that he was holding the fate of the galaxy in his tentacle and released him, and also he trained Yoda You know I think you just made that up but it's the kind of thing that could be real in the EU.
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Dec 15, 2014 23:31
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I don't think Han Solo ever hosed the otter, it was female but I think they met after he married Leia.
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Dec 15, 2014 23:36
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Fetus Tree posted:it seems naive to think that GL has no influence on star wars imo Lucas is the largest private shareholder of Walt Disney corporation .. Half of the lucafilm deal was paid for in Disney shares. So technically speaking he does have some control over things but it's more likely they will consult with him from time to time on some things.
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Dec 15, 2014 23:36
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A Mofference was a secret conference held by the Imperial Central Committee of Grand Moffs in the secluded Mofference room of their Moffship.
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Dec 15, 2014 23:37
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lfield posted:A Mofference was a secret conference held by the Imperial Central Committee of Grand Moffs in the secluded Mofference room of their Moffship. "I bid you all Dark Greetings!" ―A quote from Grand Moff Hissa, used by the Wookieepedia community to represent their own Mofferences
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Dec 15, 2014 23:39
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gohuskies posted:"I bid you all Dark Greetings!" OH COME ON http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Mofference
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Dec 15, 2014 23:50
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Don't read "Kenobi". Not because it's bad, it's just boring. "Darth Plagueius", on the other hand, is the Citizen Kane of the EU.
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Dec 15, 2014 23:51
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p-OPhGYggjQ
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Dec 15, 2014 23:53
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quote:Jedi Prince (along with The Glove of Darth Vader, The Trioculus Saga, or the Son of Palpatine series) is the informal name given to a series of Star Wars young reader novels that "take up where Star Wars: Episode VI Return of the Jedi left off." The title "Jedi Prince" refers to Ken, the twelve-year-old hero of the series who teams up with Luke Skywalker and the Rebel Alliance to fight the Empire.
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Dec 15, 2014 23:54
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quote:"Any Prophet of the Dark Side who approaches and tries to enter our Moffship will be taken hostage. That's our only way to bargain with Kadann, and save what little power we grand moffs [sic] have left in the Empire, now that Kadann has declared himself to be the new Imperial leader!" I'm the Moffship
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Dec 16, 2014 00:05
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No loving way. I thought for sure that was fake. Especially when i got to 'moffship' Jfc
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Dec 16, 2014 00:13
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Fetus Tree posted:No loving way. I thought for sure that was fake. Especially when i got to 'moffship' What up my Moffer!
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Dec 16, 2014 00:16
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gohuskies posted:I don't think Han Solo ever hosed the otter, it was female but I think they met after he married Leia. Yeah I read that horrible wookiepedia thing and I didn't see anything about Han having sex with that otter. Would've been funny if he did Otter: *makes otter noises* Han: I know...
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Dec 16, 2014 00:19
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It was really racist for leia to call chewie a walking carpet
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Dec 16, 2014 00:24
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Fetus Tree posted:No loving way. I thought for sure that was fake. Especially when i got to 'moffship' Dude, we've already established that everything has happened in the EU! I came up with 5-6 insanely improbable scenarios (but not too crazy) and in the next few posts other goons linked to those things actually happening in the EU.
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Dec 16, 2014 00:31
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Blistex posted:Dude, we've already established that everything has happened in the EU! I know and i believed it but once he said moffship i knew it had to be fake.
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Dec 16, 2014 00:35
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Fetus Tree posted:It was really racist for leia to call chewie a walking carpet Dated too, people these days don't understand the concept of shag carpeting.
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Dec 16, 2014 00:45
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To be fair, this is considered bad and not really official continuity even by the EU nerds.
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Dec 16, 2014 00:51
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Pondex posted:
C-3P0 mentions Kessel like five minutes into the movie.
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Dec 16, 2014 01:32
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Bringing us about, Your Moffulence
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Dec 16, 2014 01:37
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KotOR used the Battle Meditation plot point too but at least there they had the excuse of needing to figure out a way for you to effect a huge space battle in a game with no spaceship combat
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Dec 16, 2014 01:40
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Battle meditation makes a lot more sense if its between only force users, like in some of the vong books. Basically a LAN for your jedibrains
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Dec 16, 2014 01:42
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OneThousandMonkeys posted:To be fair, this is considered bad and not really official continuity even by the EU nerds. Complicated ranking system for determining which nerd hadith are 'real' and which aren't, and the caring about thereof, are far dumber than any Mofference.
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Dec 16, 2014 01:43
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:Complicated ranking system for determining which nerd hadith are 'real' and which aren't, and the caring about thereof, are far dumber than any Mofference. it's not official or anything its just a tacit agreement to not give a poo poo about it
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Dec 16, 2014 01:49
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Actually a number of us have officially agreed
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Dec 16, 2014 01:50
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I remember reading this one funny comic about Star Wars. You know that one red astromech droid that Uncle Owen was gonna buy before it blew up? Well this comic says it was actually a droid Jedi and it had seen that R2-D2 must meet with Luke if the galaxy was to survive. So he heroically blew himself up so that R2-D2 and C-3PO would be selected instead. I thought the comic was decently funny at the time, but now that I've looked into the EU, it's even better because now I know it was taking the piss out of all these other loving people who would probably make the Bantha that Aunt Beru got her blue milk from a Force Sensitive that foresaw that Luke would need strong bones if he were to fight the Empire, so it willingly let Beru milk it.
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Dec 16, 2014 01:57
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On the other hand, I would totally watch a show about the inner bureaucratic workings of the Empire if it had Martin Freeman and Ricky Gervais. Or did the BBC already make "The Moffice"?
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Dec 16, 2014 02:02
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Netflix did, and it stars kevin spacey. House of Karrdes
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Dec 16, 2014 02:03
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:nerd hadith Thank you for this precious bonne motte that I will run into the ground.
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Dec 16, 2014 02:15
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:Complicated ranking system for determining which nerd hadith are 'real' and which aren't, and the caring about thereof, are far dumber than any Mofference. Technically it's real but the EU Council of Elders basically retconned it all to "never happened" status because the writer went off the reservation. As opposed to Pheremone Date Rape Guy, whose storyline was the focus of a massive marketing push with a video game and everything. Oh, I did forget a certain series of video games that I'm glad happened earlier: SUPER STAR WARS Vaguely follow the plot of the first three movies, meeting all the cast of characters who incidentally appeared, and slaughter them. It's one of the better Super Nintendo games. Also the bottom of the sand crawler has a lava monster that kidnapped R2D2. You know, whatever. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bb39BV6Gs40&t=1030s Super Star Wars was fairly challenging but I never beat Super Return of the Jedi because escaping out of the exploding Death Star was just about impossible, so in my Official Super Star Wars continuity, the black guy dies at the end. I never got Super Empire Strikes Back but I hear Darth Vader was similarly difficult.
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Dec 16, 2014 02:21
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