|
MrEnigma posted:If you can get by with store brand diapers it might be cheaper, but keep in mind they might leak or not fit well, and just not be worth it. Yeesh, I feel like I missed Mrs Money Mustache's post here http://www.mrmoneymustache.com/2011/09/09/mrs-money-mustache-what-do-newborn-babies-really-need/ then. OK we'll play it safe and go for $200/mo on the items you mentioned. I'll add in a little bit more for prescription formula too. We can formulate a worst case scenario plan here, and then we can figure out whatever for spending money afterwards.
|
#
?
Dec 18, 2014 19:49
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 26, 2024 19:55 |
|
|
Knyteguy posted:Yeesh, I feel like I missed Mrs Money Mustache's post here http://www.mrmoneymustache.com/2011/09/09/mrs-money-mustache-what-do-newborn-babies-really-need/ then. You of course can do it like they recommend. But keep in mind you'll be doing a load of diapers at least once a day. If you go someplace, you'll be doing laundry there, or using disposable. Diapers aren't all that expensive, and it might not cost all that much, but it's just one of those costs that combined with everything else and other incidentals you get, are going to add up to a few hundred a month. And good news is, if you don't need that stuff, you can use that money to buy things for the next stage of the baby.
|
|
#
?
Dec 18, 2014 19:59
|
|
|
MrEnigma posted:You of course can do it like they recommend. But keep in mind you'll be doing a load of diapers at least once a day. If you go someplace, you'll be doing laundry there, or using disposable. Diapers aren't all that expensive, and it might not cost all that much, but it's just one of those costs that combined with everything else and other incidentals you get, are going to add up to a few hundred a month. And good news is, if you don't need that stuff, you can use that money to buy things for the next stage of the baby. Well yes and the discipline to do it. I agree that we need to plan to spend much more than the article says, especially since the figures she mentions there are after selling some of the stuff. I don't want to plan for a best case scenario and be stuck outside in the cold ya know. I'd rather "plan for the worst" and have some leftover cash (which is what people keep trying to tell me, but I think I actually do do this, at least since September or so). I am listening to you guys. So yea I'll $200 + some extra for prescription formula costs for the stuff mentioned in the scenario. Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 20:16 on Dec 18, 2014 |
|
#
?
Dec 18, 2014 20:13
|
|
|
I'm not a parent, so this might be way off, but this calculator seems like it might be a good easy tool to use for guesstimating baby expenses. What's truly sad is how expensive a college education will be ~18 years from now. I checked out Nevada WIC but you guys make way too much for that. WIC is an awesome program though - you should see if your SIL qualifies for it. From the sounds of things, she probably does. My Rhythmic Crotch fucked around with this message at 20:29 on Dec 18, 2014 |
|
#
?
Dec 18, 2014 20:24
|
|
|
quote:I know cloth diapers new are roughly $75, and for used maybe $50 or so?
|
|
#
?
Dec 18, 2014 20:29
|
|
|
My Rhythmic Crotch posted:I'm not a parent, so this might be way off, but this calculator seems like it might be a good easy tool to use for guesstimating baby expenses. Yep! Sister will be on WIC I'm pretty sure. I think household income plays a part in some of the programs though, so I don't know if she'll qualify for much beyond that. The Pell Grant and perhaps student loans if she needs them will be available though. I think she'll be babysitting here most of the time so she'll have a quiet place to study while we're at work. We did use that calculator you linked though when I came up with the scenarios. Also unsure how close it really is. Cicero posted:Pretty sure this is horribly wrong and a full set of cloth diapers is way more than that. Expect to spend at least a couple hundred on an infant set of cloth diapers, plus some more money on diaper covers. Oh yes I don't have confidence in the diaper figures at all. Most of what I'm going off of is Amazon searches, but I have no idea how many you need, what sizes, how often, what they come with or anything. Mostly that's because we're only planning to do them if my wife stays home, which is kind of a long shot at this point. For the sake of information though, how many of these would you need? http://www.amazon.com/Washable-Adju...s=cloth+diapers
|
|
#
?
Dec 18, 2014 20:36
|
|
|
Right so, we used cloth diapers but it was my wife who bought them, I just seem to recall them being more expensive than what you suggested, plus I googled around a bit and none of the sites I looked at seemed to say they were that cheap. See: http://www.diaperdecisions.com/pages/cost_of_cloth_diapers.php As for how many you need...maybe in the 25-30-ish range? I know that sounds like a ton, but an infant can/will go through several a day, plus you want somewhat of a buffer when your schedule overflows and you don't get to washing them when you planned, and you'll want to stash some (along with wipes and whatever else) in random places like in a diaper bag, in the car, maybe family members' houses, etc. Babies are messy, you can pretty much never go wrong with overdoing it a little on preparing for them to poop or drool on everything.
|
|
#
?
Dec 18, 2014 20:40
|
|
|
Cicero posted:Right so, we used cloth diapers but it was my wife who bought them, I just seem to recall them being more expensive than what you suggested, plus I googled around a bit and none of the sites I looked at seemed to say they were that cheap. See: http://www.diaperdecisions.com/pages/cost_of_cloth_diapers.php OK thanks for the great link, I was having trouble figuring out just what it costs. I'll see if my wife wants to run by some recycled kids stuff stores after she gets off work (she will), and I'll try to see what they run used since we need to look at some other stuff anyway, like a walking stroller. I don't think there's much of a discount used anyway, but worth a look. I'll still plan for disposables when drawing up a budget however. I think it's the smart thing to do.
|
|
#
?
Dec 18, 2014 20:48
|
|
|
All I did was google "cost cloth diapers". I'd definitely read more than one site and see if there's some consensus. PS - death to strollers, baby wraps/carriers forever
|
|
#
?
Dec 18, 2014 20:59
|
|
|
Cicero posted:All I did was google "cost cloth diapers". I'd definitely read more than one site and see if there's some consensus. Hm we have a couple wraps from the baby shower - will those work for say a 3 mile walk too?
|
|
#
?
Dec 18, 2014 21:17
|
|
|
Knyteguy posted:Hm we have a couple wraps from the baby shower - will those work for say a 3 mile walk too? You can use a baby wrap for however long you are able to walk around with a baby wrapped to you/your wife. Our friends totally skipped buying strollers for their two, and used the wraps exclusively, including when walking the dog and going on nature hikes, but it really depends on how fit/worn out you might be to begin with  Also on the diaper chat, the good news is that not all cloth diapers need liners/covers - they make "all in ones" that are very similar in use to disposables, and secondly, they are size-adjustable where one pair will fit an infant from anywhere from 10 lbs - 45lbs, depending on the diaper brand. The bad news is that, just like formula, you don't know how your baby is going to react to what kind of diapers. I've heard horror stories where a new mom gets 100s of huggies or pampers or whatever, or goes all-out on cute and expensive all-in-one cloth diapers only to find out that the baby is allergic / gets worse diaper rash / has an odd body issue and doesn't fit in the brand/type of diaper provided. So don't go overboard with stocking up until you know what works for your kid, or you might be out big bucks.
|
|
#
?
Dec 18, 2014 21:53
|
|
|
Knyte, this stuff is exactly why everyone has been on your case to try to cut back where you can and start socking away cash. Babies can be a black hole for expenses and your energy. I hope you get the quietest, best-behaved child possible, but the odds of having some curveballs thrown at you are high.
|
|
#
?
Dec 18, 2014 22:10
|
|
|
A huge % of people that I know who have said they were going to cloth diaper flake within about a week. Expecting your sister to cloth diaper your child is especially unreasonable. Given what your wife makes, if your sister can't pull off the childcare in exchange for slave labor wages I think the best choice is for her to do the childcare. I think her/your attitude may change significantly with regard to having anyone - even your sister care for your very newborn child. How long was your wife planning on not working after the baby is born? Do you have enough of a buffer to deal with the ~4 weeks she doesn't work? You need to save as much money as humanely possible prior to the child being born and you plan / budget for what is the most reasonable worst case scenario. In my opinion the worst case scenario that is foreseeable is your wife is doing the childcare (not a bad thing) and you're paying for formula and diapers. With the last few issues in mind here are my thoughts. You want life insurance? OK buy it 2 months after the kid is born to make sure you have enough room to actually afford it. You want to cloth diaper? OK don't buy any cloth diapers the first month, then if you still think you can do it, start with a 'starter pack of diapers'. How will you manage your stress when the kid comes? You have as much free money as possible. I think the idea that your food budget should be increased makes a ton of sense. You prep as well as you can - you still have that freezer full of easy meals right? But I think it's safe to assume you might spend $100-$200 on takeout the first few months. Your default behavior of spend money now, budget for it after the fact is improving, but is still your default behavior. Try to fight these urges. Think back to how you treated your lawn situation, the minute you realized you had to do your own yardwork, you ran out and spent money you didn't really have on it. The cheap/thifty guy method to this is to do jack poo poo until spring, then see what is the minimum required to keep up the lawn. Maybe you've made friends with a neighbor that will let you borrow the mower every few weeks in exchange for a 6 pack.
|
|
#
?
Dec 18, 2014 22:14
|
|
|
This is the SomethingAwful forums, let's be realistic here. Knyteguy is gonna have a lil baby goon so diaper costs are pretty much nil. The real expense is when the kid hits 4 or so and will need a decent enough gaming computer to be able to farm WoW for daddy all day long. Until then, just let the kid do his business with the dogs and the cats. Hose 'em down once in a while if you have to. That should really free up a lot of cash! I hope you and your wife don't mind having a talk about the option of her staying at home to raise your child. I know it's becoming less and less common these days but you've got a solid income and a lot of future growth. It would be really cool if she could become a stay-at-home mom and raise that little rugrat right. By which I mean that she will teach your child the basics of gold farming and how to not trigger bot-detection scripts. Priorities, man, priorities.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 02:41
|
|
|
CuddleChunks posted:This is the SomethingAwful forums, let's be realistic here. He'll make the next Glider. It is known, Something Awful Forums. For real though, I think we're making a budget tonight where she is a stay at home mom for awhile. gently caress her stupid loving job, I want her to quit tomorrow (they just took one of her days off without any notice). If she put in her two weeks notice tomorrow I'd be the happier for it. It's extreme yes, but like you said I have a pretty solid income so I think we can do it. If anyone is on reading, for real I want her to put it notice. How can we do this? Can we transition to another health insurance immediately? I don't want her working for that company any longer. It doesn't have to literally be tomorrow. I know it's not the best for our short term financials, and I respect the opinion that she should continue to work, but I'm just done with her working retail jobs. I'll post numbers tonight again with her not working, well pretty much exactly what I said earlier that I'd post, a worst case scenario. We can cut discretionary as much as we need to, and she can go back to work in a year or something, and maybe pick up something part time at her old job or our neighborhood grocery store as a cashier or something. We can save some money by her shopping smartly instead of conveniently (which we do try to shop smartly on big grocery runs), meal planning, coupons, and just having homemade dinners every night. I can also again commit to freelancing a little bit on nights and weekends to make some extra dough if necessary. Also ^^ thanks guys.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 02:56
|
|
|
n8r posted:A huge % of people that I know who have said they were going to cloth diaper flake within about a week. Expecting your sister to cloth diaper your child is especially unreasonable. Given what your wife makes, if your sister can't pull off the childcare in exchange for slave labor wages I think the best choice is for her to do the childcare. I think her/your attitude may change significantly with regard to having anyone - even your sister care for your very newborn child. How long was your wife planning on not working after the baby is born? Do you have enough of a buffer to deal with the ~4 weeks she doesn't work? We did cloth diapers for 6 months with our first child until my wife had a breakdown over all of the extra work they created. You are essentially getting paid cents an hour to laboriously clean poo poo out of every nook and cranny of a diaper, every day. Brand new poo poo, old caked on poo poo, scrub it off or blast it off with a custom hose attachment. It is brutally tedious, and once you take into account the extra wash loads (at least one full hot cycle!) + soap + the initial cost you are barely saving any money. Our son started getting diaper rash after a few months, most likely because we could never get all of the soap residue off the diapers. My sister wanted to cloth diaper, we gave her ours. She was absolutely dedicated to cloth diapering, completely certain that she would do it. Then she had a baby. Days cloth diapering: 0. My coworker came from a "huge family" and "cloth diapered all his siblings". His parents cloth diapered, he came from a long lineage of cloth diaperers. His family crest was probably a cloth diaper. He bought a bunch of them. Then he had a baby. Days cloth diapering: 0. When you give birth in a hospital, you're totally overwhelmed and you are using disposables there, for at least a couple days. By the time you come home you are hooked and the last thing you want to do is scrub poo poo to save a couple dollars.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 03:22
|
|
|
Does KGwife get insurance through her job? If not I think quitting before the kid comes makes sense. Given her hourly wages, I really doubt having her work then paying for child care will really pencil out. Quitting before the kid comes is probably a bad idea. Your two biggest costs - your rent and your car payment are a bit of a bummer (and I still maintain something could be done about the car). All that other stuff you can cut back on and I'm sure you'd be fine. Especially if you start hunting for a higher paying job or at least asking for a raise - asking for a raise right when you've had a kid is probably a good way to get said raise.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 04:39
|
|
|
n8r posted:Does KGwife get insurance through her job? If not I think quitting before the kid comes makes sense. Given her hourly wages, I really doubt having her work then paying for child care will really pencil out. Quitting before the kid comes is probably a bad idea. Your two biggest costs - your rent and your car payment are a bit of a bummer (and I still maintain something could be done about the car). All that other stuff you can cut back on and I'm sure you'd be fine. Especially if you start hunting for a higher paying job or at least asking for a raise - asking for a raise right when you've had a kid is probably a good way to get said raise. Correct. KG wife is the one with the insurance. If I remember correctly the insurance that was offered through KG's work is a disaster insurance. Also I disagree that he should use having a kid as leverage to try and get a raise. That's a pretty weak position. But he knows his work dynamic better than we do. You are going to lose out on hsa contributions as well as any paid time off she got for the child birth if she quits now. I'd say struggle through it at this point because you're so close. I just want to shake my head at this thread most of the time. Literally just a few weeks ago there was no way your wife was going to quit and now she needs to quit tomorrow. And it still appears you don't understand the bigger problem in your life.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 04:53
|
|
|
Well having the decent insurance through KGwife is probably reason enough for her to keep her job. It sounds to me like the critical path for KFwife not working is for KG to find a job that offers decent insurance for him/his family and hopefully a little pay bump at the same time. Asking for a raise because you've had a kid is a terrible way to ask for a raise. Asking for a raise based upon job performance right before the kid is due is a good way to make sure you get what you're asking for.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 05:39
|
|
|
KG I am really surprised that your wife gets better insurance than you do. That is highly unusual for a developer position, in my experience. I know you said there's not much choice in places to work, but have you looked around? Do you get many nibbles on Linkedin? I hope you're taking the "$250,000/year" thing with an enormous grain of salt.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 06:01
|
|
|
Wife's job covers insurance yea. My job offers a little more than disaster, but not by much.AbsenceVsThinAir posted:We did cloth diapers for 6 months with our first child until my wife had a breakdown over all of the extra work they created. You are essentially getting paid cents an hour to laboriously clean poo poo out of every nook and cranny of a diaper, every day. Brand new poo poo, old caked on poo poo, scrub it off or blast it off with a custom hose attachment. It is brutally tedious, and once you take into account the extra wash loads (at least one full hot cycle!) + soap + the initial cost you are barely saving any money. Our son started getting diaper rash after a few months, most likely because we could never get all of the soap residue off the diapers. OK then... no cloth diapers probably heh. I was thinking that they would clean relatively easily. Wife and I got a kick out of this btw. My wife's work carries the insurance, yes. I could probably get insurance through my work again if I wanted to, but I'd rather not - Healthcare.gov seems to offer better coverage. pre:SCENARIO 4 - Wife Stays at Home, Baby Needs Prescription Formula Income 4334 Total Expenses w/ Baby Costs Incl: 4000 Adjusted Savings: 565 Expenses: 1100 // rent 300 // groceries 100 // discretionary 100 // discretionary 65 // gas 85 // car insurance 40 // internet 20 // renter's insurance 45 // Phone 10 // bike costs 8 // Netflix 100 // discretionary 100 // discretionary 510 // car 45 // student loan 41 // ^ 100 // GMA = 2869 New expenses w/ baby: 510 monthly baby cost 500 health insurance If Wife Working: 1000 / mo Income (healthcare included) 810 baby +65 gas/mo  Plus the one time stuff we need, equaling about $6,000 for the first year. So that's our worst case scenario. Seems to me we can do it. My review is in May and I can probably look forward to a 3% raise at the minimum, since that's what I got last year and I've been a better worker this year. In this scenario we probably can't pay for the kid's college, at least until we can get out of debt. Anything too low, something I'm missing? I left default values on most that stuff except for the formula. And again I'm confident my wife can pick up something that pays more anyway. Maybe she won't want to become a developer, but there's more options like web design, and transcription, and lots of stuff. My Rhythmic Crotch posted:KG I am really surprised that your wife gets better insurance than you do. That is highly unusual for a developer position, in my experience. Yea... we're just a two person shop, plus my boss's sister in law who didn't want insurance. Not much leverage with the insurance companies I imagine. I get nibbles on LinkedIn (almost typed that as nipples hah). It's been a month or two now, but during the spring and summer I was getting at least one company contacting me for interest a week. I actually have a standing offer of interest in NYC as a Dynamics CRM developer, and a couple companies around town who have told me to contact them if I'm looking. I don't know if even a $150,000 wage would take care of expenses int NYC though (not that that's the offer). Oh I do take the yearly figure my boss mentioned with a grain of salt. I believe he's made that much, but he was also flying and working out of town 6+ months out of the year to make it work. He also did business technology consulting not just developing, so he brought a little more to the table, like showing them logistical improvements and such. But yea I've seen checks written to him for $30,000.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 06:26
|
|
|
n8r posted:Well having the decent insurance through KGwife is probably reason enough for her to keep her job. It sounds to me like the critical path for KFwife not working is for KG to find a job that offers decent insurance for him/his family and hopefully a little pay bump at the same time. I'll look into asking for a raise. Gonna be uncomfortable though. My wife probably won't quit immediately, as much as I want her to. I was just annoyed at her work hardcore when I made the post above. When she's supposed to go back to work after the baby is born though? I think we'll reeeeally be considering it, and I don't know if I'll want her to go back. I'm so sick of her jobs it's been like this since we've been together. We got married impulsively (her idea, not mine) 4 years ago. We went first thing in the morning to the court house. She called her boss seeing if she could get the day off, and the response she got was "We don't want to set a standard of letting people have the day off without good cause." Her current job is the same. She can do better than that. She has a degree. And the bonus is she'll make more money doing so. If she loses $25,000 (rough estimate of pay) by not working in 2015, plus a total guess of $10,000 opportunity cost, she could make that up in 2-3 years, plus she could find a job that actually treats her like a human being, and our entire family unit will be happier. They almost made us cancel our Christmas when her boss told her she could have the day off a month ago. Also if I'm doing the math right then we'll only save $100 more from my wife working. It might even be more expensive if child care is $400/mo. Am I missing something? The numbers I posted above are correct, but I can't tell if I'm doing the math correctly with fatigue brain. Edit: no it was fatigue brain. It's like $600-$700 more per month in free income if she works. Still don't think it's worth it, especially if she's learning a skill over the following year that follows. Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 06:45 on Dec 19, 2014 |
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 06:29
|
|
|
What is your wife's and your pre-tax salary? Also, you call your insurance from work "disaster insurance", but your wife obviously already has a high deductible plan. Can you elaborate on how her insurance is different/better than what is available to you?
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 06:39
|
|
|
Droo posted:What is your wife's and your pre-tax salary? My pretax is I think $63,000 (and some unknown hundreds) My wife's pretax is $13.50/hr @ 37 hours / week, so $26,000 give or take. I can't elaborate, because I don't know the details of my work's offerings any longer. I just remember that after looking at it, my wife's insurance ended up better.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 06:43
|
|
|
If you are a software developer and you don't suck at it, you are underpaid even for Reno. Your wife's income should pretty much be entirely taxed at 15% with no state tax, so she is adding (assuming 4 weeks total off) $24000 less 15% federal tax and 7.65% self employment tax, or $18564 a year or $1547 per month. She has some other advantages, so you can think of the $1547 per month as the bare minimum she is contributing (e.g. health savings contributions are more tax efficient, she is apparently getting subsidized insurance, etc). So if you really want to do an analysis on whether she should quit her job or not, here are some of the things I would consider as relevant: 1. $1547 per month in post-tax income. 2. Access to health insurance, which you need to do a real comparison of at some point. 3. Continuity of job/career (e.g. not working for 5 years will make working again later harder) 4. Contributions to social security (working more = more benefit later in life for her) 5. Childcare costs in lieu of stay-at-home mom 6. Vehicle/Gas costs associated with working 7. Quality of life regarding: mom wanting to be around baby If I were you, I would try and get a better job that basically makes up the whole income difference and then my wife could not work and it would be a moot point.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 07:04
|
|
|
In reverse order: Dec 18: For real though, I think we're making a budget tonight where she is a stay at home mom for awhile. gently caress her stupid loving job, I want her to quit tomorrow (they just took one of her days off without any notice). If she put in her two weeks notice tomorrow I'd be the happier for it. Dec 12: Yea I don't know when the transition happened with my wife's job thing, I don't think either of us knew how hard the holiday season would be (they drastically changed her schedule and didn't really give much of a heads up). There've been no decisions made yet though, except that she'll try to pick up a skill on her off time as she can. We understand it's probably a long shot, but that's OK as long as we can do it safely. I think her moving to the grocery store a couple blocks from us, or to her old company would be good for part time work. Dec 10: Scenario 1: My wife stays at home while she picks up a new skill whenever she can (maybe 6+ mos), and not working at all. , and we priced Gold tier Healthcare.gov plan at ~$600/mo. Savings ~$600/mo after cutting discretionary by $100 ea/mo. We could potentially save $200/mo more if we chose the worst tier of insurance, and there are some plans in between. Scenario 2: My wife stays at her job while she picks up a new skill whenever she can. We would keep the same insurance we have now. Accounting for child care costs with my sister. $1800/mo in savings, plus HSA assuming we cut discretionary by $100 ea/mo. Scenario 3: My wife quits her current job very soon, she starts picking up a new skill immediately, we pick up a healthcare.gov plan at roughly the same price but without a subsidy (worse insurance, same price basically). Savings ~$860/mo assuming we cut discretionary by $100 ea/mo. The best thing for our finances RIGHT NOW is definitely her keeping her job, but I don't know if that's the best decision for us long term. I also don't know if any scenario except for #2 is actually feasible. Dec 3: Thanks for the input everyone. My wife is actually leaning towards coding, which surprises me a bit. Manpower could be a good segue in the meantime though... I think as long as she's pulling in even some kind of income right now we'll be fine. I'm sure this will help her see some possibilities. Oct 21: I have run the numbers if my wife doesn't go back to work. It's tight, but we're definitely still net positive and saving/paying off debt. That's with assumed new baby expenses and insurance. But she is going back to work unless there's some complications. We have a contingency plan in place. Oct 14: OK I had a lot posted here, but spwrozek I feel like you're missing a lot here. My wife will probably go back to work. If she doesn't then we'll save 250 minutes a week of city driving in traffic in gasoline, plus all that time I could be spending on the business. Sept 24: Here's what I figure the options are: 1) (My third choice) She becomes a stay at home mom. With her help we've gotten me to a point where my job makes this is at least possible. 2) (My preferred choice) She becomes a stay at home mom. She picks up a skill that puts us in a better financial position than before the baby and goes back to work in a couple years. If she wanted to work towards something that would actually put us in a good spot, then great. She's been non-committal on this before when I tried to teach her web design, or coding, or encouraged her to try to start selling her paintings. I'd put up with sub-par living conditions for a couple years if it meant she was working towards something. She did it for me. 2) (My last choice) She goes back to work at the same place after her maternal leave is up, without looking for a new job. 3) (My preferred choice) She finds a job in the industrial/office area around my work. You'll note I said a job for her that isn't retail would also help my happiness. I don't know how she feels about it. She'd be happier with her job doing this, I'm pretty certain of that. Carrying the financial burden of the household on my income with a child is difficult. If I made 6 figures or something gently caress yes #1 it is. It's not that cut and dry though. Again I'm willing to #1 it if that's what she really wants. It's her decision. I'll give her my input of course. I won't be miserable, or I'll try my best not to be. It'd be nice to have a meal everyday when I get home too. That'd help ease the pain a bit . also: I think income-wise the worst-case scenario means up staying in our apartment no matter what then. Even with the ultra-thin budget I posted last night I don't think we can make the numbers work otherwise. $500 for the baby, $400 for insurance, there's no room leftover. I'm OK with this if my wife wants to stay home and rear the baby. (and then you moved) and OK so this has been thrown out there a couple times (budgeting like my wife isn't working). My wife will probably have 9 weeks off for the baby, and unless she changes her mind then she said she probably wants to live somewhere else rather than stay at home. I imagine she needs to give it more thought though. Considering that, can you explain to me what the motivation is to budgeting without my wife's income? I understand the higher rent, but just not that part. If it's to ensure that if she changes her mind about going back to work, then so be it. If it's to ensure we can live on just my income if poo poo hits the fan, then so be it. and I don't think we can afford for my wife to stay home yet. Not until we get some debt paid off. However I'm willing to budget like my wife isn't working, and budget like we're living in a more expensive place anyway. It's just another way of saving. and I did the same math last night as you posted. Your outlook also doesn't include the fact that my wife's job covers our insurance. I don't think we can get away with her not working at this point. That's loving ludicrous to me. I know I can get a business (or charity) off the ground. It doesn't have to be -right this minute- though. Aug 11: Forgot to mention that my wife is going to be trying out transcription next month to see if she can stand it enough to exclusively work from home after the baby is born. She's not going to quit her job or anything yet because of insurance, but maybe she could segue into it full time after the birth and we can get private insurance. And in conclusion, TAKE US SERIOUSLY WHEN WE WARN YOU ABOUT THESE THINGS.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 11:19
|
|
|
Horking Delight posted:In reverse order: No sense harping on the past, what's done is done, we need to reassure Knyte that he's a good guy & we want him to succeed, and JUST BECAUSE he acts impulsively doesn't mean he's ACTUALLY impulsive and there's no way to predict that a life-changing event like a new baby will actually CHANGE HIS LIFE, guys. If only someone had told him about all this months ago!
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 16:13
|
|
|
I know you do web dev of some flavor or another, and I'm under the impression that this is your first job that you've ever made any real money. Assuming you now have developed a pretty strong programming skillset you flat out need to leave your job and find a job that pays you a market rate. The odds of you getting paid that at your current job sound pretty slim. What is your current health insurance state of affairs - your wife gets insurance for both of you? How much are you paying for that? Semi decent insurance for two people can easily cost $500/month - so take that into account. Assuming your wife has a normal birth and you have a healthy kid, I'm not sure it's necessary to have some Cadillac level health plan. You could definitely go with a cheaper plan *IF* you do a good job of funding your HSA (assuming you get an HSA plan). In conjunction with the HSA/bronze level plan you can shop around for your care. I have a fancy gold level HSA plan, but I still go to the 'community health' place just down the road because they do a drat good job and their services are quite cheap. Ideally you would have come to this realization six months ago, but whatever - you can't turn back the clock. Frankly, a lot of the posters in here tend to focus on pretty micro level issues so that can get really distracting. If you can manage to bump your income into the mid 70s range and get good health insurance that covers you and your family at a reasonable rate, you'll be in a much stronger financial position. Droo posted:Your wife's income should pretty much be entirely taxed at 15% with no state tax, so she is adding (assuming 4 weeks total off) $24000 less 15% federal tax and 7.65% self employment tax, or $18564 a year or $1547 per month. That's not really correct since they're filing jointly and their incomes are combined. Not sure how the math works out, but I'd guess in total his taxes are in the ~30% range when you combine incomes and all that other stuff.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 16:21
|
|
|
He can probably get mid 70s at his current place. Knyteguy, Your best leverage will come if you have another offer in hand. There's a very specific way of telling a person that you want more money or you're leaving the company that won't hurt them. Something like "I really like it here working for you and I want to stay but the debt's piling up and I feel forced to do what's best for my family".
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 16:25
|
|
|
I believe that KG is part of a very small operation. Asking for a raise with an offer in hand or a manipulative statement like what you've given are two of the worst ways to ask for raises. You ask for a raise based upon your performance at work and what are typical salaries for the particular job you work at. One of the main issues with KG's current job is they do not provide good insurance - no way of getting around that. If he finds a job that pays exactly the same, but provides good insurance for his whole family, that can be a $500-$1000/month benefit. I can tell you that we pay on average around $350/employee per month. If said employee wants to add their family, they are on the hook for another ~$500 per month (depending on ages). We do not provide any support for the employee to add their family/kids to their plan. So the TL:DR of this entire situation is if KG even makes a lateral salary move to another job paying $65k/year that covers him/his family he can be looking at somewhere in the $700/month effective pay raise. A 3% raise that KG thinks he might get is borderline offensive if an employee is performing well. KG saying asking for a raise will be 'uncomfortable' is a 'no poo poo sherlock' situation. Asking for a raise is always stressful, but if you prepare yourself with a document outlining all of the benefits you've brought to the company AND what typical pay scales are for your job in the area there is a very good chance you'll get it. I'd wager that KG's boss is well aware he's getting a bargain - but staying at the job is probably not the best way to maximize his income. Knyteguy posted:and a couple companies around town who have told me to contact them if I'm looking This is a very little - VERY important nugget of information. Time to buck up and go talk to these people - see how serious they are about this talk. This is the time to be shrewd about your value and have a little confidence in how much value you bring to a company. Talk is often talk, but sometimes they are quite serious, and they may be willing to pay you a hell of a lot more money than what you're paying now. I believe there is a thread somewhere talking about how to negotiate offers - start reading that. Making a nice pile of money is one of the easiest way to address a lot of your financial concerns.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 16:43
|
|
|
Are you sure you're taking your taxes out correctly this year? You don't want a surprise tax bill in January. What are you claiming? Married 1 Single 1 Married 0?
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 17:12
|
|
|
n8r posted:
I asked him his specific salary and then looked up his specific situation using his specific numbers. Why would you add a comment to "guess" that I'm wrong when you didn't even look? Knyteguy said he makes $63000 and his wife makes like $26000 for a combined income of $89000. They immediately and automatically receive two personal exemptions ($7900) and a standard deduction ($12400) for a new taxable income of $68700. In 2014, married filing jointly filers pay 15% federal income tax on all taxable income between $18150 and $73800. The wife's income clearly falls completely into this range. In addition to that she presumably pays 1/2 of payroll taxes like I stated above, for another 7.65%, or a total maximum tax burden of 22.65% on KGwife's entire income. I say that it is a total maximum burden because we also know that KGwife contributes to a health savings account and pays for/receives insurance through her job. If she makes the HSA contributions via payroll deduction, she actually saves the entire 22.65% because payroll HSA contributions receive an "above the line" tax deduction for federal tax, and they also are not subject to FICA tax. So if she hypothetically contributes $5000 to their HSA, she will save an additional $1132.50 in taxes paid making her actual effective tax burden go from 22.65% down to just 18.3%.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 17:24
|
|
|
Droo posted:I asked him his specific salary and then looked up his specific situation using his specific numbers. Why would you add a comment to "guess" that I'm wrong when you didn't even look? I also love that people in BFC say things like "I'm guessing that's wrong", how the hell could you be at 30% tax with 89k income, MFJ?? They're at ~18.6% before HSA, which I don't feel like looking for the numbers of contribution via my phone! I think they're shooting for about 5-5.5k this year. E: I just looked at healthcare.gov - living in NV FTL! $529/mo for a Bronze PPO HSA family plan, 12k deductible! $435/mo for a HMO HSA family plan with a 12.6k deductible. gently caress that, HMO FTL. You need to job hop KG! My buddy just graduated and got his first job as a dev in PDX, he makes a good bit more than you with benefits calculated in. He pays ~$500/yr for medical/dental and his company pays in $1250 to his HSA, and gives a 6% instant vest 401k match to low fee funds... SiGmA_X fucked around with this message at 18:29 on Dec 19, 2014 |
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 18:07
|
|
|
^ Wow. Thanks guys for the research. I think I claim 3 right now. I'm pretty certain we'll owe taxes (I've brought this up before). I can swing some business deductions to reduce a little of the burden, but yes we'll definitely owe. Of course the social security office has my birthday wrong... technically I am an unperson in the USA.  I don't think I'm underpaid, or at least I wasn't when I started. No I don't suck at programming. Sigma: that's nuts man $500/yr!? Ugh yea I'm just loyal and it doesn't help my career you're right. However my boss has told me multiple times that if I need days off to interview that's fine, and to always do what's best for my family. He'll even give me a letter of recommendation. But again the biggest problem is that there aren't many shops around here. This is how most job postings look: 
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 18:44
|
|
|
Download the tax caster app from turbo tax and figure out your taxes. It takes about 10 min and has been within a few dollars for me the last three years if you are diligent about the info you put in. I don't understand people who are obviously intelligent knowing little about their taxes. This could be a pretty big issue depending on what you owe.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 18:51
|
|
|
Wow you claim 3... That seems way the gently caress off. We (the thread) must have been sperging about something distracting because I don't remember mention of this, but I bet you mentioned it. Like the medical debt that I forgot about. Go calc your tax burden today. You don't want to owe. Jebus.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 20:36
|
|
|
KG what kind of stuff do you do specifically? Are we talking jQuery and css only, or do you know some back-end technology like Java or Python? Do you know any Linux? Just trying to get a feel for the area and what you might be able to do. e: also CL is horrible lol
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 20:47
|
|
|
Alright I'll calculate what we'll owe tonight and post it up.My Rhythmic Crotch posted:KG what kind of stuff do you do specifically? Are we talking jQuery and css only, or do you know some back-end technology like Java or Python? Do you know any Linux? Just trying to get a feel for the area and what you might be able to do. Um I think I probably qualify as a full stack dev. I've written server backends, clients, mobile apps, frontend behavior, do website design, I troubleshoot/debug Windows Server/IIS/SQL Server, I've setup Windows and Linux servers from scratch, and I've continually maintained a Linux server for about 5 years for my web hosting business, and written some decently technical bash scripts (well technical for me, at least). I've done work in Java, C#, NodeJs, javascript/jQuery, SQL, MySQL, php, X++, CSS, HTML, etc. C# is definitely my strength though, as I have the most hours in it by far. I've also had companies really trying to get ahold of me as an ecommerce website manager, as I have experience doing that both personally and professionally. My down side however is that I need to study data structures and algorithms. Being self-taught my knowledge base there is extremely limited. I've put in some work at practicing coding interviews (thanks Cicero), but I need to do some whiteboard coding practice, and finish that Cracking the Coding Interview book. If I put in the time doing that I'm confident I could leverage myself into a much better job, although I think it would probably entail moving to a tech city (Seattle, the SF Bay Area, DC, Boston, or Austin)? I'd like to live in pretty much any of those towns, anyway. But actually there are some tech firms in Incline Village Lake Tahoe, which is only about 30 minutes from here. Lake Tahoe isn't exactly cheap though, and the snowfall there would pretty much require a truck for clearance purposes (or a lifted El Camino  )  However you may have more insight than I do and I'm totally wrong here. I'm still pretty new to this industry as a professional rather than doing it on the side for fun. Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 21:08 on Dec 19, 2014 |
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 21:06
|
|
|
Something to keep in mind: moving to a major tech hub sounds like a great idea for a career, but your pets will be problematic, because all those cities (except for maybe Austin) have something in common: high housing costs. Which means most people, and especially most frugal people, live in apartments, unless they want to have a long commute.
|
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 21:35
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 26, 2024 19:55 |
|
|
Cicero posted:Something to keep in mind: moving to a major tech hub sounds like a great idea for a career, but your pets will be problematic, because all those cities (except for maybe Austin) have something in common: high housing costs. Which means most people, and especially most frugal people, live in apartments, unless they want to have a long commute. Yea a long commute just isn't something I think I could do. A long commute for me is over 15 minutes. I guess if it came down to it, I would rehome our cats, but it would have to be to the right people. I'd make time to get the dogs exercise even in an apartments. But I've never lived anywhere but here in my entire life, so I don't know if that's realistic, or not. Maybe Los Angeles or Portland? e typo e2: edited out something that sounded really stupid. Knyteguy fucked around with this message at 21:54 on Dec 19, 2014 |
|
#
?
Dec 19, 2014 21:42
|
|