RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

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m.hache: Dec 1, 2004; Fun Shoe

Just keep on doing what you're doing. If he wants to attempt to circumvent the ticket system/chain of command he can suffer from the atrocious delivery times.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 17:37

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# ? May 16, 2024 17:33

chocolateTHUNDER: Jul 19, 2008; GIVE ME ALL YOUR FREE AGENTS

ALL OF THEM

Sirotan posted:

A ticket didn't come in, because I've got a user here who either hates me or is too afraid of me to ever actually send me tickets/email. It's so weird, I don't even know what I should do about it. He just sent my boss an email regarding a request to pick up some non-IT equipment at a remote site 60 miles away. My boss is a part time consultant who does not go to sites ever. User knows this.

I'm now noticing a pattern. A while back he talked to my ex-coworker regarding a printing issue. I think he actually waited until I was out of the building to do this. I'm the one who primarily deals with printer issues, and seeing as my coworker promptly forgot to tell me about the issue, I didn't learn about it until 3 weeks later when he sent my boss (still not the IT list OR a ticket) an angry email asking why the issue hadn't been fixed. I can think of other similar situations as well.

He's a 40-something gay guy who I'm not particularly close with but am nothing if not professional and pleasant with him all the time. I don't get it. Is he afraid of me? Does he hate me because I'm a woman? I've dealt with enough misogynist types in this line of work that I know what to do if I encounter them, but this? I.......I don't know.

Is your boss getting pissed at you for these incidents? If not, gently caress it. He's not bothering to contact you about any problems he's having, so whatever. If you're getting in trouble because of stuff like this, it might be worth it to just reach out to the user and explain that by getting in touch with you, it'll help everyone out and make the process easier.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 17:45

Cool Dad: Jun 15, 2007; It is always Friday night, motherfuckers

I do not hate macs. However, we have a windows environment. We use AD, SCCM, RDP, Windows network drives, exchange, the works. I have no viable tool to remote in to a mac, and nobody is going to invest in the software infrastructure to properly integrate them into the network. So why do departments keep buying macs?

I've got a particular user who has an iMac that he destroyed trying to upgrade to Yosemite (without consulting us first). He had a time machine, but he didn't use it because he couldn't figure out how it works. As a result, I've spent a week trying to reimage this thing with mavericks and recover his data, particularly his ten years of archived outlook mail. If he'd had windows this would've taken a day or so, mostly to copy the giant pst around. Instead I'm sitting here loving about with copying giant folders into different identities in hope that outlook will deign to recognize them. It probably won't.

I look under his desk and what do I see? A brand new MacBook Air, still in the shrink wrap. :fuckoff:

# ? Dec 23, 2014 18:24

Proud Christian Mom: Dec 20, 2006; READING COMPREHENSION IS HARD

Gilok posted:

I do not hate macs. However, we have a windows environment. We use AD, SCCM, RDP, Windows network drives, exchange, the works. I have no viable tool to remote in to a mac, and nobody is going to invest in the software infrastructure to properly integrate them into the network. So why do departments keep buying macs?

I've got a particular user who has an iMac that he destroyed trying to upgrade to Yosemite (without consulting us first). He had a time machine, but he didn't use it because he couldn't figure out how it works. As a result, I've spent a week trying to reimage this thing with mavericks and recover his data, particularly his ten years of archived outlook mail. If he'd had windows this would've taken a day or so, mostly to copy the giant pst around. Instead I'm sitting here loving about with copying giant folders into different identities in hope that outlook will deign to recognize them. It probably won't.

I look under his desk and what do I see? A brand new MacBook Air, still in the shrink wrap.

these people should be shot into the loving sun

# ? Dec 23, 2014 19:08

ConfusedUs: Feb 24, 2004; Bees?
You want fucking bees?
Here you go!
ROLL INITIATIVE!!

Time machine is seriously the easiest backup thing ever. You click a button to turn it on?

Dude didn't try.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 19:26

Zamboni Apocalypse: Dec 29, 2009

go3 posted:

these people should be shot into the ~~loving~~ iSun

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And this is why I'll stick with XP Win7, *that* version doesn't have these issues!

:ughh:

# ? Dec 23, 2014 19:29

Alliterate Addict: Jul 10, 2012; dreaming of that face again

it's bright and blue and shimmering

grinning wide and comforting me with it's three warm and wild eyes

Gilok posted:

I do not hate macs. However, we have a windows environment. We use AD, SCCM, RDP, Windows network drives, exchange, the works. I have no viable tool to remote in to a mac, and nobody is going to invest in the software infrastructure to properly integrate them into the network. So why do departments keep buying macs?

I've got a particular user who has an iMac that he destroyed trying to upgrade to Yosemite (without consulting us first). He had a time machine, but he didn't use it because he couldn't figure out how it works. As a result, I've spent a week trying to reimage this thing with mavericks and recover his data, particularly his ten years of archived outlook mail. If he'd had windows this would've taken a day or so, mostly to copy the giant pst around. Instead I'm sitting here loving about with copying giant folders into different identities in hope that outlook will deign to recognize them. It probably won't.

I look under his desk and what do I see? A brand new MacBook Air, still in the shrink wrap.

I love using a Mac but god I'd hate to have to support it in any sort of "professional" environment. My job's IT department takes the ~~lazy~~ best way out though, for all platforms:

"This is your laptop. You have local admin. You want to triple boot Windows 7, OSX, and Linux on it? Have fun. You want to install Bonzi Buddy and click every attachment that comes through Outlook? Go for it. You break it? We're reimaging it, I hope you have backups. Physically break it? You're using one of our 2010 loaners until your upgrade cycle comes around."

It's pretty refreshing.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 20:01

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

That's how we roll, Backblaze on all client devices, people do their own poo poo with it.

gently caress having to manage network logins on a Mac, it will be flawless 80% of the time but the rest of the time will destroy your liver.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 20:10

Paladine_PSoT: Jan 2, 2010; If you have a problem Yo, I'll solve it

Sirotan posted:

A ticket didn't come in, because I've got a user here who either hates me or is too afraid of me to ever actually send me tickets/email. It's so weird, I don't even know what I should do about it. He just sent my boss an email regarding a request to pick up some non-IT equipment at a remote site 60 miles away. My boss is a part time consultant who does not go to sites ever. User knows this.

I'm now noticing a pattern. A while back he talked to my ex-coworker regarding a printing issue. I think he actually waited until I was out of the building to do this. I'm the one who primarily deals with printer issues, and seeing as my coworker promptly forgot to tell me about the issue, I didn't learn about it until 3 weeks later when he sent my boss (still not the IT list OR a ticket) an angry email asking why the issue hadn't been fixed. I can think of other similar situations as well.

He's a 40-something gay guy who I'm not particularly close with but am nothing if not professional and pleasant with him all the time. I don't get it. Is he afraid of me? Does he hate me because I'm a woman? I've dealt with enough misogynist types in this line of work that I know what to do if I encounter them, but this? I.......I don't know.

Pinnipedophobia?

# ? Dec 23, 2014 20:34

FISHMANPET: Mar 3, 2007; Sweet 'N Sour
Can't
Melt
Steel Beams

Mac doesn't want to be in your Enterprise, so why even try.

Mac OSX "Server" is now a $30 purchase from the App store. I'll believe Apple is serious about the Enterprise when they let you run OSX on a non-Apple VMware cluster.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 20:35

ElGroucho: Nov 1, 2005; We already - What about sticking our middle fingers up... That was insane; Fun Shoe

Ursine Asylum posted:

I love using a Mac but god I'd hate to have to support it in any sort of "professional" environment. My job's IT department takes the ~~lazy~~ best way out though, for all platforms:

"This is your laptop. You have local admin. You want to triple boot Windows 7, OSX, and Linux on it? Have fun. You want to install Bonzi Buddy and click every attachment that comes through Outlook? Go for it. You break it? We're reimaging it, I hope you have backups. Physically break it? You're using one of our 2010 loaners until your upgrade cycle comes around."

It's pretty refreshing.

Oh god

Are you hiring

# ? Dec 23, 2014 20:48

Alliterate Addict: Jul 10, 2012; dreaming of that face again

it's bright and blue and shimmering

grinning wide and comforting me with it's three warm and wild eyes

ElGroucho posted:

Oh god

Are you hiring

Developers, yes, but I'm pretty sure our IT department is going to hang onto their jobs until ~~retirement or~~ death.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 20:50

Kurieg: Jul 19, 2012; RIP Lutri: 5/19/20-4/2/20

Clearly it's time to create an opening.

What do you think would work best, single combat or battle royale?

# ? Dec 23, 2014 20:52

Snuffman: May 21, 2004

Ahh...the magic of IT in retail.

Remote site sits on issues right up until Christmas week and THEN puts tickets in, when it's too busy for me to fix it.

They're not major issues in a "it's AFFECTING PRODUCTION" :argh:

but they can't take the equipment down for me to work on it because that WOULD affect production.

I'm half tempted to say "see you after the holidays" but my SLAs get hurt. So, like a chump I'm staying in a hotel, so I can go to the site before opening tomorrow to work on the tickets.

Thank goodness work will pay for the hotel, it just sucks being away from home during the holidays.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 21:11

Renegret: May 26, 2007; THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*

Cat Army Sworn Enemy

Snuffman posted:

Ahh...the magic of IT in retail.

Not my story, but a good friend of mine who used to work at Best Buy told me something that happened while she was working there.

A few years ago (3-4 I think), Best Buy went through an enormous internal reorganization of all their stores. It moved departments around, combined Geek Squad and customer service, and a whole bunch of stuff. As a result of the Geek Squad/Customer service merge, all the stores were left with a giant pile of useless customer service POS machines that had to be relocated and re-imaged with the Geek Squad ticketing systems.

The company was totally oblivious this would happen, and their IT department proceeded to get thousands of requests within the next few days to move and reimage computers. Obviously IT did not have the manpower to handle this in a timely manner.

So IT's response? The CFO blasts out a company wide e-mail stating that they will NOT be honoring any re-imaging or relocation requests until further notice. This was, of course, just a few weeks before Thanksgiving.

Must be nice when your CFO endorses the "Stick your fingers in your ears and ignore the problem completely while the company burns" method of dealing with challenges.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 21:36

Lum: Aug 13, 2003

Garrand posted:

In that case

I'm just tired of people from billing and sales that just straight up won't do their jobs. I know the pay all around sucks and that they get dinged for credits / disconnects,
...
Also getting straight up hung on by reps when you tell them they need to reschedule an install or someone wants to cancel their account.

To be fair, if your sales people get their pay dinged for disconnecting a customer, and you are handing them a call with someone who wants to disconnect, you may as well be handing them a plate of dogshit. I'm really not surprised they want to hang up on you.

This isn't your fault, but your company's system is very very broken.

Give them a bonus for talking someone out of disconnecting and I guarantee they'll start wanting to take those calls.
Better option :yotj:

# ? Dec 23, 2014 21:45

Renegret: May 26, 2007; THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*

Cat Army Sworn Enemy

Lum posted:

Give them a bonus for talking someone out of disconnecting and I guarantee they'll start wanting to take those calls.
Better option

Yeah but that costs money.

Don't be crazy.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 21:48

Volmarias: Dec 31, 2002; EMAIL... THE INTERNET... SEARCH ENGINES...

Lum posted:

Give them a bonus for talking someone out of disconnecting and I guarantee they'll start wanting to take those calls.
Better option

Isn't this the definition of the retentions department?

e: Nevermind, I guess the "bonus" there is "continued employment".

# ? Dec 23, 2014 22:29

incoherent: Apr 24, 2004; 01010100011010000111001
00110100101101100011011
000110010101110010

Who got burned on the barracuda cloud outage?

# ? Dec 23, 2014 22:36

Lum: Aug 13, 2003

Volmarias posted:

Isn't this the definition of the retentions department?

e: Nevermind, I guess the "bonus" there is "continued employment".

The way I interpreted it is the sales people also get to do disconnects, but whoever actually does the disconnection is the one who gets dinged.

So basically you end up with a situation akin to Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck passing a live hand grenade to each other.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 22:36

Great Orb!: Feb 4, 2009

incoherent posted:

Who got burned on the barracuda cloud outage?

One of our fussy clients did. My coworker had to ring up their IT director and tell them about it.

They were understandably crossed and tried to blame us for some reason. :shepicide:

# ? Dec 23, 2014 22:58

Storysmith: Dec 31, 2006

incoherent posted:

Who got burned on the barracuda cloud outage?

Yeah, that sucked.

# ? Dec 23, 2014 23:09

Renegret: May 26, 2007; THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*

Cat Army Sworn Enemy

incoherent posted:

Who got burned on the barracuda butt outage?

I was too busy beating my head on a different outage :smithicide:

# ? Dec 24, 2014 00:36

HUGE SPACEKABLOOIE: Mar 31, 2010

~~Lets switch gears for a second to a nicer topic, I've got a free 30 day trial to Crashplan for Enterprise Endpoint. First person to PM or email me at therealcap at gmail dot com gets it.~~

And claimed! There is a home crashplan 1 year for sale down in SA Mart right now though!

HUGE SPACEKABLOOIE fucked around with this message at 03:01 on Dec 24, 2014

# ? Dec 24, 2014 02:20

Agrikk: Oct 17, 2003; Take care with that! We have not fully ascertained its function, and the ticking is accelerating.

Welp,

Must be Christmastime at the in-laws house. Got in yesterday and my father-in-law waited until today to tell me about his computer woes, which included not being able to browse the internet, popups all over the place and general slowness.

So yeah, I spend two hours cleaning all the viruses, toolbars, freeware, spamware, shitware and all the other -ware he's installed on it and get it back up and running well. Well, as well as an AMD X2 dual-core runs these days.

So now that the machine is healthy I start doing routine maintenance tasks like cleaning up temp folders, emptying trach, CHKDSDK, defrag, etc ad decide to do windows updates. ~ 1 gig of downloads. Last update 12/26/12. The day after Christmas two years ago when I last performed cleanup on his PC.

Well at least he hasn't really bothered me in two years, I guess...

# ? Dec 24, 2014 02:33

skooma512: Feb 8, 2012; You couldn't grok my race car, but you dug the roadside blur.

incoherent posted:

Who got burned on the barracuda cloud outage?

I wish I did. Then it would be on the plate someone who knows how to fix it, and better yet a plate that isn't mine. Ours has a hard drive on site, that I'm responsible for despite only being desktop.

On site is 100 miles away.

# ? Dec 24, 2014 03:33

The Muffinlord: Mar 3, 2007; newbid stupie?

Agrikk posted:

Welp,

Must be Christmastime at the in-laws house. Got in yesterday and my father-in-law waited until today to tell me about his computer woes, which included not being able to browse the internet, popups all over the place and general slowness.

So yeah, I spend two hours cleaning all the viruses, toolbars, freeware, spamware, shitware and all the other -ware he's installed on it and get it back up and running well. Well, as well as an AMD X2 dual-core runs these days.

So now that the machine is healthy I start doing routine maintenance tasks like cleaning up temp folders, emptying trach, CHKDSDK, defrag, etc ad decide to do windows updates. ~ 1 gig of downloads. Last update 12/26/12. The day after Christmas two years ago when I last performed cleanup on his PC.

Well at least he hasn't really bothered me in two years, I guess...

Why would you not turn on automatic updates, force restarts(in the middle of the night), and schedule ccleaner to run weekly or something? You'll just be back at it in another two years because unless the thing catches on fire, he ain't replacing it, let's be honest.

# ? Dec 24, 2014 03:54

Actuarial Fables: Jul 29, 2014; Taco Defender

incoherent posted:

Who got burned on the barracuda cloud outage?

Who knew email was so popular?

(11 out of 110 queued )

# ? Dec 24, 2014 05:05

skooky: Oct 2, 2013

skooky fucked around with this message at 06:21 on Dec 24, 2014

# ? Dec 24, 2014 06:09

Rohaq: Aug 11, 2006

Ursine Asylum posted:

I love using a Mac but god I'd hate to have to support it in any sort of "professional" environment. My job's IT department takes the ~~lazy~~ best way out though, for all platforms:

"This is your laptop. You have local admin. You want to triple boot Windows 7, OSX, and Linux on it? Have fun. You want to install Bonzi Buddy and click every attachment that comes through Outlook? Go for it. You break it? We're reimaging it, I hope you have backups. Physically break it? You're using one of our 2010 loaners until your upgrade cycle comes around."

It's pretty refreshing.

My favourite part of Macs is the way that updates released by Apple will so often break things that Enterprise applications tend to rely on. Java is generally the best example. Usually with no easy way of downgrading, too.

# ? Dec 24, 2014 12:09

spankmeister: Jun 15, 2008

Don't run "enterprise" software on macs hth.

# ? Dec 24, 2014 13:24

Sonic Dude: May 6, 2009

My entire job is enterprise Mac management. It's not bad at all if you disable the consumer-friendly automatic updates and other stuff that doesn't really apply to a business user. Apple also hasn't distributed Java in quite a while, and the system which blocks vulnerable versions from Oracle can also be disabled/modified with relative ease.

They'd be pretty bad for an enterprise environment if you just hand the user a Mac and say "go to town," but why do that with a Mac if you wouldn't do it with a Windows box?

# ? Dec 24, 2014 14:21

dox: Mar 4, 2006

You guys do realize Macs are managed in large environments with Casper (JAMF) and/or Puppet... right? It's not some voodoo magic, it's actually being done.

# ? Dec 24, 2014 14:22

Roargasm: Oct 21, 2010; Hate to sound sleazy
But tease me
I don't want it if it's that easy

You know what else isn't voodoo magic? The software updater. I'm on my fourth rebuild of the profile manager since Mavericks dropped thanks to that piece of poo poo.

# ? Dec 24, 2014 14:54

Volmarias: Dec 31, 2002; EMAIL... THE INTERNET... SEARCH ENGINES...

Agrikk posted:

Welp,

Must be Christmastime at the in-laws house. Got in yesterday and my father-in-law waited until today to tell me about his computer woes, which included not being able to browse the internet, popups all over the place and general slowness.

So yeah, I spend two hours cleaning all the viruses, toolbars, freeware, spamware, shitware and all the other -ware he's installed on it and get it back up and running well. Well, as well as an AMD X2 dual-core runs these days.

So now that the machine is healthy I start doing routine maintenance tasks like cleaning up temp folders, emptying trach, CHKDSDK, defrag, etc ad decide to do windows updates. ~ 1 gig of downloads. Last update 12/26/12. The day after Christmas two years ago when I last performed cleanup on his PC.

Well at least he hasn't really bothered me in two years, I guess...

Get him a chromebook.

Actually everyone get non-technical relatives chromebooks.

# ? Dec 24, 2014 16:15

Guy Axlerod: Dec 29, 2008

poo poo, I even got myself a Chromebook.

# ? Dec 24, 2014 16:22

Collateral Damage: Jun 13, 2009

spankmeister posted:

Don't run "enterprise" software on macs hth.

Any "enterprise" software that relies on a specific JVM is going to be unmitigated poo poo regardless of platform.

# ? Dec 24, 2014 16:42

Gumball Gumption: Jan 7, 2012

Collateral Damage posted:

Any "enterprise" software that relies on a specific JVM is going to be unmitigated poo poo regardless of platform.

Personal experience confirms this.

# ? Dec 24, 2014 16:52

m.hache: Dec 1, 2004; Fun Shoe

So I was told to come in today at 11AM for a 4 hour shift. You know, light duty. Was pumped to get to sleep in, enjoy a coffee and chill with the pup.

Nope.

8:30 AM I get a call from the boss. "My router is acting up. Go buy one now. Also get my son a Gaming mouse".

It's loving Xmas eve. I do all of my shopping a month in advance so I don't have to deal with the poo poo show that is last minute shopping.

# ? Dec 24, 2014 17:08

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# ? May 16, 2024 17:33

Esser-Z: Jun 3, 2012

Unless you're a personal shopper or butler or something, I'm pretty sure that's not in scope.

# ? Dec 24, 2014 17:10

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

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