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Prediction Contest time! Since the real life AFC Asian Cup is currently taking place, and the one in this LP will be starting in a few months, the prediction contest will be who wins the 2027 Asian Cup. I've put together a spreadsheet with information you'll need to predict the outcome, just post your predictions here when you're done. Entry will be open until the LP's Asian Cup ends, which should be about six updates from now.
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Jan 22, 2015 00:41
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A: India - Bahrain - Syria - Kuwait B: Australia - Oman - China - Singapore C: Japan - South Korea - Uzbekistan - North Korea D: Iran - Saudi Arabia - Qatar - Lebanon QFs: India vs. South Korea Australia vs. Saudi Arabia Japan vs. Bahrain Iran vs. Oman HFs: South Korea vs. Australia Japan vs. Iran 3rd: South Korea vs. Iran F: Australia vs. Japan
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Jan 22, 2015 00:52
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A Syria India Bahrain Kuwait B Australia China Oman Singapore C Japan South Korea North Korea Uzbekistan D Iran Saudi Arabia Lebanon Qatar Quarter Finals Syria v South Korea Australia v Saudi Arabia Japan v India Iran v China Semi Finals South Korea v Australia Japan v Iran Finals Winner: Australia v Japan Third place: South Korea v Iran
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Jan 22, 2015 01:15
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A: India - Bahrain - Syria - Kuwait B: Australia - Oman - China - Singapore C: Japan - South Korea - Uzbekistan - North Korea D: Iran - Saudi Arabia - Qatar - Lebanon QFs: India vs. South Korea Australia vs. Qatar Japan vs. Syria Iran vs. Oman HFs: South Korea vs. Qatar Japan vs. Iran 3rd: South Korea vs. Iran F: Qatar vs. Japan Banking on some of the Qatari magic from 2022 remaining.
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Jan 22, 2015 01:28
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Predictions! Groups A: India - Syria - Bahrain - Kuwait B: Oman - China - Australia - Singapore C: Japan - Uzbekistan - South Korea- North Korea D: Iran - Qatar - Saudi Arabia - Lebanon Knockout rounds India vs. Uzbekistan Oman vs. Qatar Japan vs. Syria Iran vs. China Semifinals Uzbekistan vs. Qatar Japan vs. Iran 3rd Place Uzbekistan vs. Iran Finals Japan vs. Qatar
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Jan 22, 2015 01:30
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Groups A: India - Syria - Kuwait - Bahrain B: Oman - Australia - China - Singapore C: Japan - South Korea - Uzbekistan - North Korea D: Iran - Qatar - Saudi Arabia - Lebanon Knockout rounds India vs. Australia Oman vs. Qatar Japan vs. Syria Iran vs. China Semifinals Australia vs. Oman Japan vs. Iran 3rd Place Oman vs. Iran Finals Japan vs. Australia
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Jan 22, 2015 01:37
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Group A: India-Bahrain-Syria-Kuwait Group B: Australia-Oman- China- Singapore Group C: Japan-South Korea-Uzbekistan-North Korea Group D: Iran Qatar -Saudi Arabia-Lebanon QF 1: South Korea vs India QF 2: Australia vs Qatar QF 3: Japan vs Bahrain QF 4: Iran vs Oman SF 1: South Korea vs Australia SF 2: Japan vs Iran 3rd Place: Iran vs South Korea Finals: Japan vs Australia Special Match: John Cena vs Thailand Thanks to Not My Leg for correcting my error Dreamsicle fucked around with this message at 03:47 on Jan 22, 2015 |
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Jan 22, 2015 02:14
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A: India - Syria - Bahrain - Kuwait B: Oman - China - Australia - Singapore C: Japan - South Korea - North Korea - Uzbekistan D: Saudi Arabia - Iran - Qatar - Lebanon QFs: South Korea d. India Iran d. Oman Japan d. Syria Saudi Arabia d. China HFs: South Korea d. Iran Japan d. Saudi Arabia 5th: Kylie Minogue d. Mississippi State 3rd: Iran d. Saudi Arabia F: Japan d. South Korea
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Jan 22, 2015 02:40
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Group Stage A: India, Bahrain, Syria, Kuwait B: Australia, Oman, China, Singapore C: Japan, South Korea, Uzbekistan, North Korea D: Iran, Qatar, Saudi Arabia, Lebanon Quarterfinals South Korea d. India Australia d. Qatar Japan d. Bahrain Iran d. Oman Semifinals South Korea d. Australia Japan d. Iran Final/Consolation Japan, Champions over South Korea Iran, Third over Australia E: Dreamsicle posted:QF 1: India vs Oman Dream, you have the wrong matchups here. It should be A v C and B v D. Not My Leg fucked around with this message at 22:34 on Jan 29, 2015 |
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Jan 22, 2015 02:57
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Group A: India-Bahrain-Syria-Kuwait Group B: Australia-Oman- China- Singapore Group C: Japan-South Korea-North Korea- Uzbekistan Group D: Iran Qatar -Saudi Arabia-Lebanon QF 1: India vs South Korea QF 2: Australia vs Quatar QF 3: Japan vs Bahrain QF 4: Iran vs Oman SF 1: South Korea vs Australia SF 2: Japan vs Iran 3rd Place: South Korea vs Iran Finals: Japan vs Australia Kingal fucked around with this message at 03:06 on Jan 22, 2015 |
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Jan 22, 2015 03:02
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A India Syria Kuwait Bahrain B Australia China Oman Singapore C Japan North Korea South Korea Uzbekistan D Qatar Saudi Arabia Iran Lebanon Quarter Finals India vs North Korea Australia v Saudi Arabia Japan v Syria Qatar v China Semi Finals India v Australia Japan v China Finals Winner: India v Japan Third place: Australia v China
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Jan 22, 2015 03:53
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A: India, Bahrain, Syria, Kuwait B: Australia, China, Oman, Singapore C: Japan, South Korea, Uzbekistan, North Korea D: Iran, Qatar, Saudi Arabia, Lebanon Quarters: India def. South Korea Australia def. Qatar Japan def. Bahrain Iran def. China Semis: Australia def. India Iran def. Japan 3rd Place: Japan def. India Final: Iran def. Australia
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Jan 22, 2015 04:16
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habeasdorkus posted:Prediction Contest time! Who's the host nation? Home field advantage is a thing, you know. (I'm guessing it's one of the nations in group A)
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Jan 22, 2015 14:04
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Kuwait is hosting. So yes, while home field advantage matters, it really doesn't help them.
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Jan 22, 2015 20:42
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 We've got three spots on the board open. First come, first serve, and let me know which nationality you'd like to be.
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Jan 22, 2015 22:50
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I'd like to apply and Mexican, just like Stringel.
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Jan 22, 2015 22:52
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I was one before, am I eligible for being a board member again? Ghostwoods could use a Greek bud!
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Jan 22, 2015 22:54
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Yep, former boardmembers can apply.  One more spot left.
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Jan 22, 2015 22:55
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I would like to be from San Marino on the offchance of a San Marinese wonderkid.
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Jan 22, 2015 22:57
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Done and done.
habeasdorkus fucked around with this message at 23:03 on Jan 22, 2015 |
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Jan 22, 2015 22:59
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A: Bahrain Syria India Kuwait B: Australia China Oman Singapore C: Japan North Korea South Korea Uzbekistan D: Iran Qatar Saudi Arabia Lebanon N. Korea def. Bahrain Australia def. Qatar Japan def. Syria Iran def. China N. Korea def. Australia Japan def. Iran Japan def. N. Korea Australia def. Iran
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Jan 23, 2015 07:21
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Might not get an update up until next week, I've got the next several written but I'm on my way to see my pops for his 60th birthday. I've got a couple skits to write on the next update, but rough drafts are done and screenshots are taken for the next four updates. Also, if there are writing tics of mine that I overuse or that just don't work, let me know. I try not to repeat myself, but a side goal of this lp is to become a better writer. habeasdorkus fucked around with this message at 13:59 on Jan 23, 2015 |
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Jan 23, 2015 13:37
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habeasdorkus posted:Done and done. Only one Welshman on the board? drat foreigners coming over, taking our football clubs, making them great... I bet they don't even serve proper meat pies anymore. Also Habeas, don't worry about updating: do it in your own time. It's just great to have you back at all! The writing is good, too. You don't seem to be overdoing anything; it's all nice and balanced.
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Jan 23, 2015 14:17
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A: India Syria Bahrain Kuwait B: Australia China Oman Singapore C: Japan South Korea Uzbekistan North Korea D: Iran Saudi Arabia Lebanon Qatar India vs S. Korea Saudi Arabia vs Australia Japan vs. Syria China vs Iran India vs Saudi Arabia Japan vs China Japan vs India China vs Saudi Arabia
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Jan 23, 2015 14:34
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habeasdorkus posted:Done and done. Hey I used to be on the board before the LP paused  where did I end up? Did I embezzle too much (or maybe too little) money?
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Jan 23, 2015 19:51
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You either retired or got voted out. 
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Jan 23, 2015 20:22
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And Japan and Iran are out of the cup, both by penalty shootout.
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Jan 23, 2015 20:25
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Group A India Kuwait Syria Bahrain Group B Australia China Singapore Indonesia Group C Japan South Korea North Korea Uzbekistan Group D Iran Oman Saudi Arabia Lebanon Quarterfinals India vs South Korea Australia vs Oman Japan vs Kuwait Iran vs China Semi-finals Australia vs South Korea Iran vs Japan Final Iran vs Australia Third place Japan vs South Korea
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Jan 26, 2015 02:55
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Chapter the Fifth: Ten year reunion. November 1, 2026-November 27, 2026 We play in five games this month, and then for the rest of the season the schedule will be jam packed. The biggest game is a visit from Manchester City, who currently sit in the relegation zone but are talented enough to give us trouble if we're not careful. We'll also almost certainly lock down our knockout round spot in the Champions League, a point from either match versus Wolfsburg or Basel should do the trick.  That's unexpected, we must have a lower burn rate than I anticipated.  Nope, we're spending money much more quickly than I thought we would. There's only £23m in the bank, we had been at £60m when the season began. This club is right up against it's financial limits, we are almost certainly going to have to sell some players next summer. Since the board did not approve of the president's increase in our transfer budget, I will be resetting it back down to it's original total.  At least our jerseys continue to fly off the rack. We could clear £40m this year on those alone.  That's great, I'm sure missing the best player in MLS because of injury didn't hurt us in the World Cup.  Everton are terrible this year, but what interests me is that Noel Tosh has been at Huddersfield for all of five months and is already on the hot seat.  The Turf November 3, 2026 (A wet, windy storm rages outside, and A MAN steps in with a heavy coat and his hat pulled down low. He moves gracefully to the bar.)  : Hey barkeep, how about a pint? : Hold on a second, I recognize you...quote:
: Heh, yeah, it's been a while.: So what brings “Agent Coulson” back into town?: Coach called me up after I retired and asked if I was busy. I was on a train that night. : Well let me get you that pint!(The door opens again to admit ANOTHER MAN in a heavy coat and a hat pulled low on his head. He moves purposefully to the bar.)  : 'Lo barkeep, can I get a pint?: It can't be.quote:: : I was wondering if I'd see you here.: And I the same. It's exciting, getting the whole gang back together, isn't it? : Wait, the whole gang? What's going on here? Are you having a laugh at my expense?(A THIRD MAN stands up from a shadowed corner table, and strides commandingly over to the bar.)  : It's no joke, but I'll admit being a bit hurt you don't recognize me, Daffyd. After all the hours I've spent in this bar, and you recognize these jokers before me?: Coc y gath! Of course! How did I not recognize you?quote:
: I'm not sure, my face is in about a dozen pictures in this room. (An especially bright spear of lightning crackles through the window panes, followed by a booming peal of thunder as A FINAL MAN walks into the bar.)  : Ah, you're all here. Daffyd, get them a dram of my private stock. This occasion deserves more than the water you British call beer.(The four coaches raise their glasses together in a salute.) : Up the Dragons! Up Wrexham! Up Wales!At Wolfsburg, November 4, 2026 Champions League, Group H  A point from this match will qualify us for the next round. The Wolfsburg manager doesn't think I'm very good at my job:  I'd like to prove him wrong, but I'm not going throw our best team out there when I can give the kids some time to play. Especially if I can give my son a chance to play. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control Starting 11: Minami, Patel, Hammatt, Tounkara, Cirjak, Bailey (c), Brown, Mercado, Allan, Damgaard, Stringel. Subs: Kocsis, Reed, Laux, Bale, Bouzid, Moctezuma, Thiago. Stringel has had a down season, struggling with injury and not playing up to his ability with only one goal in his first eight appearances thus far. So it's good to see him score quickly to give us the lead. Damgaard doubles up before twenty minutes have passed, scoring from his own rebound. He's proving he has quite the nose for net, it's his fourth goal in nine games. We're still celebrating Damgaard's work when Wolfsburg pulls one back 47 seconds later. That one goal lead holds until the end of the game. Then we squander the victory by allowing a final minute goal to former Red Dragon Daniel Matko. Bailey gave away the ball in a terrible place and then Cirjak made an error to let his old teammate and countryman reach the far post unaccosted and score the equalizer.   Wolfsburg 2-2 Wrexham  A draw keeps our streak alive, but I'm disappointed we didn't show up that schmuck Attila Kovacs in front of his home crowd.  It's too bad that Simpson, Lewis, and Coulson aren't actually good at coaching. They're not awful, but Simpson and Coulson top out at three stars and Lewis tops out at three and a half. I'm fine with that, the contracts are intended to give them sinecures anyways. At Derby County, November 8, 2026 Premier League  Derby bounced back after one season in the Championship, but it's an open question as to whether they'll be able to stay up since they're only a point above the drop at the moment. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control Starting 11: Minami, Reed, Tounkara, Laux, Loseille, Zouaghi, Shirra, Moctezuma, Stringel, Mujkic (c), Thiago. Subs: Kocsis, Cirjak, Hammatt, Maloney, Ünsal, Bale, Parr. Former Wrexham youth prospect Michael Upson gives the home team joy in the fifteenth minute. We trail until the third time is the charm for Thiago after an hour of wasted chances and wasted effort. Our push for a winner goes wanting, though, and we drop points for the second time in as many games.   Derby 1-1 Wrexham  At least Chelsea flat out lost to Palace, so that we can at least take solace in being the last undefeated team remaining.  I pulled everyone I could from their international teams. Our players need a rest, and this upcoming ten day period is the last chance I'll have to send them on one.  Ok, now stay healthy. Otherwise James Loseille is going to die of exhaustion around March because we have no one who can replace him.  I don't think there was any question that Brony Hunter was going to stay on for another term after he won the triple in his first year. I have found it odd that the elections are held midseason, though. A late May election date would make much more sense.  That's all well and good, and I'd be excited for either String or Meteor, but what about Thiago? vs Swansea City, November 21, 2026 Premier League, Welsh Derby  Swansea's head coach is on the brink of getting fired due to their poor start. It's his bad luck that the Swans are playing us just when everyone is healthy and well rested. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control Starting 11: Minami, Reed, Hammatt, Quiboulaz, Laux, Shirra, Parr, Stringel, Mujkic (c), Thiago. Subs: Kocsis, Cirjak, Tounkara, Maloney, Allan, Damgaard, Mercado. J Quibz scores in the first three minutes of his return to service. That lead vanishes ten minutes later, we're constantly leaking goals as of late. The lads finally push through a second goal at the end of the first half, but I'm not appeased. We've hit the post three times in 50 minutes. Some call it bad luck, I call it being off target. After my two minutes of hate at halftime we play better, padding the lead when Thiago nicks the ball deep in Swansea territory and quickly gets the ball to Parr in front of the net. Thiago then scores a goal of his own from a Mujkic corner, and despite a frustrating first 40 minutes we come out well ahead after Swansea and Stringel trade late goals. Man of the Match: Steve Reed   Wrexham 5-2 Swansea  The one thing I wish I could change about using fictional players is the lack of historical records. No, Wrexham did not just set a record for going unbeaten, because the 2003-2004 Arsenal Invincibles went the whole damned season without losing once. At Basel, November 24, 2026 Premier League  The only meaning this game has for us is in keeping our unbeaten streak. I don't really care about that, because I feel like it should have been over when we lost the Community Shield. Two years ago we used the WM against Basel when we were trying to throw the match and get them into the second round over PSG. But the WM is an English formation and only 100 years old. Why use that when we have something older and closer to home? It's time to re-invert the pyramid:  Wrexham invented the Pyramid in the late 1870s on their way to victory in the Welsh Cup. It was the main formation in professional soccer for most of the next fifty years, and I aim to reintroduce it to a global audience. Starting Formation: Pyramid (2-3-5) Starting 11: Minami, Tounkara, Hammatt, Laux, Shirra, Maloney, Parr, Stringel, Thiago, Allan, Mujkic (c). Subs: Kocsis, Quiboulaz, Bale, Zouaghi, Ünsal, Damgaard, Moctezuma. First blood goes to Wrexham, as Tounkara gets forward on a Thiago free kick. Ten minutes in we've had 70% possession. That doesn't hold up the entire half, but it's still a 1-0 game and Basel haven't been successful at counter-attacking us. Mujkic adds a second from far out wide that the opposition keeper lets go off their hands, and it starts to get ugly. First Laux is tackled hard, and forced to come off. That doesn't slow out offense, as Parr makes it three-nil when he hits the post and the ball bounds right back to him for a simple finish. Basel are able to score against us in the final twenty minutes, as they get a 3-2 chance that they put away. They feel humiliated, though, and take it out on Shahed Parr with another crunching tackle that drives him from the game. A look at the match stats show just how dominating the Pyramid was. As the away team Wrexham had over thirty shots and 15 chances. On a day with better finishing we could have won 10-1. But there was a cost to be paid, with injuries to our starting right winger and our defensive rock. Hopefully they don't prove serious. Man of the Match: Dramane Tounkara   Basel 1-3 Wrexham  At least Laux isn't seriously hurt.  But Parr's injury causes a problem for us. I don't want to use Matias Mercado that much because he's gone from being a valuable player to awful in short order, and because I definitely don't want to trigger his vesting option that would cost us another £11.5m next year. At the same time none of Pickee, Moctezuma, or Bale are ready for a full time jobs.  Thanks to two draws we've given up some of our advantage in the league, with Southampton creeping to within five points and Arsenal sitting six back. If you told me that we'd be five points up on second place by Thanksgiving, though, I'd have taken that in a heartbeat. Now we just need to keep it up throughout the rest of the season. 
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Jan 27, 2015 00:39
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.png)
: No, damnit. It's just another bratwurst stand mocked up to look like a beer garden. This is the worst trip ever.
So, how mad do you think he'll be when he finds out we drank his emergency scotch?
: Look, I'm the captain. It's my job to protect this team. I'm sure I can handle whoever, or whatever is out there.
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Manchester United sitting back in 7th with a 0 goal differential just feels weird after the last few seasons.
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Jan 27, 2015 00:51
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Whoa how are Southampton so good this year?
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Jan 27, 2015 00:54
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"Coc y gath?" Wow, that's something my grandparents used to say. Haven't heard that in a while. And why are Everton so terrible this season?
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Jan 27, 2015 01:10
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Dreamsicle posted:Whoa how are Southampton so good this year? Good leadership and a Long Plan coming together.  (how ARE we so good, habeasdorkus?)
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Jan 27, 2015 01:25
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Southampton is good because their giant payroll is finally working for them. They're probably not a second place team, but the poor start for United and the FFP sanction on City opened up room at the top. They've got a real chance at a top four finish, though. Everton is bad because they sold their best player hours before the transfer window closed and didn't replace him, and then their second best player got hurt for the first three months. Those two players were much better than the rest of their squad.
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Jan 27, 2015 02:25
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So what are the coaching stats for Simpson, Lewis, and Coulson?
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Jan 27, 2015 08:39
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Finally got caught up on 128 pages! Now, if the pyramid can easily beat Basel, just imagine what it could have done to Derby. Incidentally, looking back, you only beat a lovely American team* by three goals. Might it be time for a tactical change? *Seriously, I'm from the area and FM is the only reason I've heard of them.
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Jan 27, 2015 11:14
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Dreamsicle posted:Whoa how are
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Jan 27, 2015 15:41
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Chapter the Sixth: Quick hits. November 26, 2026-December 12, 2026 Our schedule is making it hard for me to create standard length updates, so this one will just have to be short and sweet.  Thiago isn't having quite the season he had last year, but it's still better than almost any other striker in the world. At Liverpool, November 28, 2026 Premier League  After a strong start for Liverpool they've tailed off some over the last month and haven't won in their last three games. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control Starting 11: Minami, Reed, Hammatt, Quiboulaz, Loseille, Maloney, Ünsal, Pickee, Stringel, Mujkic (c), Thiago. Subs: Kocsis, Cirjak, Laux, Bailey, Damgaard, Moctezuma, Allan. Stringel makes a great pass to give Thiago an opportunity on a fast break before the Liverpool defense can set up, Thiago gets his league leading 12th goal of the season. Then String shows what happens when you have a Dribbling attribute of 20 by taking the ball from midfield, cutting past three defenders, and accurately finishing an excellent goal. He finishes up with a second assist by going to ground in the box and drawing a penalty, which Ünsal converts. Then his day ends when he mistrikes the ball in the 72nd minute, our third player who's needed to be removed from the game due to injury in the last four days. We can't hold on for a shutout, something that's been a problem for us recently, but Stringel's replacement Callum Allan scores to keep the final margin of victory at three. Man of the Match: Isaac Stringel   Liverpool 1-4 Wrexham  He's being left to the tender care of our staff, Callum Allan can take his place quite well for the two weeks he'll miss. It's a shame, though, because Stringel just hasn't been very good this season and he was hurt in the first league match he dominated all season.  We're going to be deep in the red come spring.  A decade ago we'd be one of the teams mentioned as a minnow. I'd love to face Woking, they're a Conference Regional/Skrill South club.  Instead Wrexham is literally the second to last team to be drawn, which gives us a home game against a Southampton team that still holds second place as we near the midpoint of the season. vs Manchester City, December 1, 2026 Premier League  City would still be all the way back in seventh place if they hadn't been docked five points for Financial Fair Play violations, so it's not like they're having a great season. They've been hot as of late, not losing since the end of September, so we might be in for a fight. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control Starting 11: Minami, Reed, Tounkara, Laux, Loseille, Bailey, Shirra, Mercado, Allan, Mujkic (c), Thiago. Subs: Kocsis, Cirjak, Quiboulaz, Maloney, Damgaard, Pickee, Moctezuma. Matias Mercado shows that he's not dead yet, getting an assist on an Allan goal and then earns a penalty. Shirra doesn't miss penalties. Later Mercado nutmegs one of the two men marking him on a pass to Reed, Reed takes it into the box, dodges a tackle, and then selflessly passes across the front of the net to a wide open Shirra. It's all over by halftime, and for the first time in over a month we keep a clean sheet. Man of the Match: Scott Shirra   Wrexham 3-0 Man City  It's December 1st and we're down to £2.9m in our bank account.  Thiago made the shortlist, but he's not seen as a real contender for the award. He's still getting my first place vote. He's got fifteen more goals than the next closest person (Rocky Bastable), and on top of that he's 5th in assists. Mujkic, Stringel, Shirra, Laux and Reed make the 35 man shortlist this year as well. Our six players are the most of any team, and there's four players who made the shortlist who came up with us (Bastable, Bram Aarts, Carlos Matias “El Juez” Cardozo, and Matty Collett) so at least I can stop ranting about respect or the lack thereof. Along with Thiago comes Mujkic on my ballot, and my third vote goes to Shirra. I had thought that I might be picking Isaac Stringel as my third vote, but he hasn't been that good since the World Cup. At Tottenham Hotspur, December 5, 2026 Premier League  Spurs are terrible this year, languishing in 18th place. If the season ended today Tottenham would fall from the top division for the first time since 1977. Their manager is under pressure, and rightly so. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control Starting 11: Minami, Reed, Hammatt, Quiboulaz, Loseille, Maloney, Shirra, Pickee, Allan, Mujkic (c), Thiago. Subs: Kocsis, Cirjak, Laux, Bailey, Ünsal, Damgaard, Moctezuma. Meteor makes his case for the Ballon d'Or in the first two minutes with an exceptional individual effort. He adds another bullet point three minutes later with an assist from a pinpoint cross to Mitchell Pickee, our unhappy youngster who I denied a transfer to a couple months ago. Twenty minutes later Thiago draws a foul on a corner, and of course Shirra doesn't miss, and we've run out to a three-nil lead. Just before the half that becomes a four-nil lead, as we get a second penalty when Loseille is barged from behind. Shirra's now up to eight league goals on the season, his most since 2022-2023. Thiago makes sure to add to his Ballon d'Or resume as well, and scores a goal in the second half. We're not done piling on Tottenham yet, though, as Pickee gets his second goal of the game in the final minutes. Man of the Match: The Golden Boy   Tottenham 0-6 Wrexham  A six-nil loss at home would turn up the pressure on most coaches even if they weren't at the bottom of the table and taking on water.  It takes some serious cheek to go out and talk about leaving your current job because it's beneath you when you're on the verge of being shitcanned for incompetence. Who does this guy think he is?  Oh man, now it makes so much more sense. Tosh is AU-Brendan Rogers. How did I not realize that earlier?  Tunisia is a good travel location for us. Much better than the trip to South Korea we had to take the last time we were in the Club World Cup. vs CSKA Moscow, December 9, 2026 Champions League, Group H  I'm not going to break out the Pyramid again as I just want to get this over with. The Muscovites have a chance of advancing if they can win and Wolfsburg loses at home to Basel, which is a thin reed of hope but still something they'll fight for. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control Starting 11: Kocsis, Cirjak, Hammatt, Laux, Quiboulaz, Bailey (c),Ünsal, Moctezuma, Bouzid, Damgaard, Thiago. Subs: Landgraf, Spyropoulos, Patel, Zouaghi, Brown, Alvir, Bale. It's the youth squad show as 18-year-old Ali Bouzid scores his first senior team goal via a Thiago assist. Bouzid also gets his first assist for the club by returning the favor to Thiago. It turns into a dream debut near the end of the match, as Bouzid bags a brace in his first start as a Dragon. Man of the Match: Ali Bouzid   Wrexham 3-0 CSKA    Ugh, how dull. I don't think a single three or four seed made it through to the knockout round. The only teams from outside of the top four leagues (and PSG) are Ajax and Porto, the dominant forces in their respective countries.  If a dip in form is a three game stretch of draws that includes two away fixtures against Champions League teams, we're clearly over it. Next up is the Club World Cup in Tunisia, then the Quarterfinal of the League Cup, and then two matches against Leeds United and Reading. If we make it through them unscathed, we'll have played 63 matches in 2026 and lost two of them. And one of those was for the Community Shield, a glorified friendly. Life is good.  (The table is missing because I forgot to get a screenshot of it.)
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Jan 27, 2015 18:30
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I love Noel Tosh, just not when he's managing my team. He just moves around quite quickly.
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Jan 27, 2015 18:34
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| # ? May 28, 2024 01:48 |
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Chapter the Seventh: We need a bigger trophy cabinet. December 13, 2026-January 1, 2027 Ah, time for the Club World Cup. A minor tournament that's given far too much attention by the game because FIFA is trying to make it a major event despite the fact that it's less than two decades old and the only winners are European and occasionally South American clubs.  Who are we playing?    Meanwhile, the Asian Cup is drawn. It will begin in January. Kuwait are the hosts of the tournament, and as such Group A is all minnows. Even so the hosts are unlikely to get through to the knockout round.  You've got to be kidding me, Tottenham. I really hope you get relegated.  AU-Tony Pulis is unceremoniously dumped. Is it just me or have there been more sackings than usual?  Aww, I was hoping to get the Ivorian team. We played Seoul last time, and I wanted something new. vs FC Seoul, December 16, 2026 Club World Cup, Semifinal  Let's get this over with. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control Starting 11: Kocsis, Cirjak, Tounkara, Laux, Quiboulaz, Bailey (c), Ünsal, Mercado, Allan, Damgaard, Thiago. Subs: Minami, Mattuschka, Hammatt, Zouaghi, Shirra, Moctezuma, Pickee. We're sluggish in the first half, and it takes until just before the half for us to score when Mercado gets his first goal of the season. Bailey follows with his first of the season right after the break, and Thiago scores in the 54th minute to place us safely ahead. Seoul don't give up, but they're too far behind with too little time to have any hope despite creating several chances. Man of the Match: Justin Bailey   Wrexham 3-1 Seoul  Ünsal was hurt in the final minute of the match and now he's crocked until at least March. I was planning on selling him during the winter window, so the real loss here is to our bank account.  That's lucky. If we get by the Rovers we face another Championship squad rather than Chelsea or Arsenal in the semifinal.  Valencia are one of the easier teams we could have drawn, they're roughly as good as Chelsea or Arsenal. vs Gremio, December 19, 2026 Club World Cup, Final  Hey Dias, your boys won the Libertadores this year! Congratulations! Their reward is facing off against us. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control Starting 11: Minami, Reed, Hammatt, Laux, Loseille, Maloney, Shirra, Pickee, Stringel, Mujkic (c), Thiago. Subs: Kocsis, Cirjak, Quiboulaz, Zouaghi, Allan, Damgaard, Moctezuma. Steve Reed gets us a penalty shout, but for the first time in seven years Shirra's not automatic! We have 10 shots and five chances in the first 10 minutes and nothing to show for it. Then Reed is injured in the 30th minute, and the Gremio player gets away with just a yellow for his two footed assault. Our lads finally score shortly after halftime, it only took us 21 shots to find net. Then we earn a second penalty a few minutes later and this time Shirra doesn't miss. When Mujkic is tripped up in the box five minutes after that and Shirra scores his second penalty of the day it seems like this ref may have money on the outcome. We don't score again, and Gremio denies us a clean sheet but doesn't threaten otherwise. Scoring only three goals when given three penalties and taking 32 other shots is awful, and I don't mince words with the players despite our win. Man of the Match: Mateo Mujkic   Wrexham 3-1 Gremio  Now we can get back to things that actually matter. Rather, we can get back to things that matter after our League Cup match against Blackburn. vs Blackburn Rovers, December 22, 2026 League Cup, Quarterfinal  I don't even want to think about how crowded our schedule is going to be if we make it through to the semifinal and add another two matches in January. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control Starting 11: Minami, Reed, Tounkara, Quiboulaz, Loseille, Zouaghi, Allan, Parr, Stringel, Mujkic (c), Thiago. Subs: Kocsis, Cirjak, Hammatt, Maloney, Shirra, Damgaard, Pickee. An early goal always makes things easier, and we have breathing room after Stringel puts one away in the ninth minute. Yet we struggle again to score. It's a good thing we create so many chances, because we do a terrible job putting them away. In the second half Stringel scores again, a Blackburn defender earns a straight red, and we coast to victory with a man advantage over the final 15 minutes. It was an unexciting game, and we once again fail to score as much as we should. Man of the Match: Isaac Stringel   Wrexham 2-0 Blackburn  Can you feel the Cup fever? I sure can't. At Leeds United, December 26, 2026 Premier League  The team has played three fewer games than the rest of the league thanks to the crimp in our schedule created by the Club World Cup and League Cup. Despite that, we still have a four point lead atop the table. Leeds welcome us to town in the midst of a strong season, they're a single point off of a Champions League spot, so they do have the potential to surprise us and we're going to need a competent job to ensure victory. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control Starting 11: Kocsis, Cirjak, Hammatt, Laux, Loseille, Maloney, Shirra, Pickee, Stringel, Mujkic (c), Thiago. Subs: Landgraf, Reed, Quiboulaz, Zouaghi, Allan, Parr, Moctezuma. Thiago has a goal called back in the 8th minute, but scores in the 18th from a Mujkic corner, in their fourth year of playing together the two have an incredible feel for each other's play. Thiago adds a second two minutes later. When we earn a penalty Shirra offers the shot to Thiago, who misses and denied his hat trick. He's back at the spot fifteen minutes later and this time doesn't miss. Three goals isn't enough for Thiago, though, so he scores a fourth right after halftime. The only disappointment on the day is when Quibz gives Leeds a late penalty which prevents a shutout. Man of the Match: Thiago   Leeds 1-4 Wrexham  With Parr healthy again I don't have to use Mercado, but Pickee has been pretty good so far in his limited appearances and is showing why he has sky high potential.  Our Braziltaliowelshman isn't quite as great as he was last season, but he's still notched 24 tallies in 27 matches this season.  I hope Lajos Kocsis is ready to step up while Koji is gone. More importantly, he needs to stay healthy. 16-year-old Malte Landgraf has great potential but he's only a decent League 1 player at this point in his career. At Reading, December 29, 2026 Premier League  This is our final game of the year, so let's end 2026 on a high note. Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control Starting 11: Kocsis, Reed, Tounkara, Laux, Loseille, Bailey, Shirra, Parr, Stringel, Mujkic (c), Thiago. Subs: Landgraf, Cirjak, Quiboulaz, Zouaghi, Allan, Damgaard, Moctezuma. Thiago has a goal called back again, which allows Reading to draw first blood. It only invigorates our players, and the response is immediate and overwhelming. Stringel gives us the lead with two goals and Parr adds a third all within 10 minutes of Reading's strike. Much later in the match Mujkic gives us our traditional three goal lead, and our defense doesn't allow any late game shenanigans. Man of the Match: Isaac Stringel   Reading 1-4 Wrexham  This for some reason counts the Community Shield as a draw, which it wasn't. So really, we had a streak of 30 unbeaten games snapped by that loss, and are now on a new 29 match unbeaten streak. Even if we had won the Community Shield we'd still be a ways off of the English record. AFC Wimbledon holds that, after going a whopping 78 games over 22 months without a loss from 2003-2004.  Being at the top of the table despite our opponents playing three more games than us shows just how huge our lead is. We're missing matches versus Nottingham Forest and Southampton, and at West Ham. We'll take at least six points from those games, meaning that our lead over Chelsea and United is more like 12 to 15 points. That's going to be almost impossible for them to overcome. Also, if we can win our next two Premier League matches we'll have gone a full calendar year without losing, something we should accomplish playing bottom half Huddersfield and bottom of the table Everton. 
habeasdorkus fucked around with this message at 17:01 on Jan 28, 2015 |
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Jan 27, 2015 19:19
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