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Big Coffin Hunter
Aug 13, 2005

#DBvsDZ 10 minutes including entrances

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KungFu Grip
Jun 18, 2008

Cory Lidle posted:

I would love for them to be stupid enough to try and turn Bryan heel for that program. Delicious Vince chest clutching.

Daniel Bryan sympathy got crowds to boo HBK and cheer HBK getting beaten up, so I'm like 90% sure that Bryan can get the crowd to boo The Rock. Helps that there might be some left over Roman heat on him.

Sanguinia
Jan 1, 2012

~Everybody wants to be a cat~
~Because a cat's the only cat~
~Who knows where its at~

If Triple H doesn't come out on Raw, maximum smugface over the Patriots beating the Seahawks, compare their choke to Daniel Bryan in the Rumble, and then eat a knee before the night is over, I will have lost all faith.

Sanguinia fucked around with this message at 08:37 on Feb 2, 2015

KungFu Grip
Jun 18, 2008

Sanguinia posted:

If Triple H doesn't come out on Raw, maximum smugface over the Patriots beating the Seahawks, compare their choke to Daniel Bryan in the Rumble, and then eat a knee before the night is over, I will have all faith.

He's gonna do all that except for the last part.

Dimebags Brain
Feb 18, 2013





Fat Lowtax posted:

Daniel Bryan will fight Dolph and it will only be okay. Hail Satan Belichick 2016.

This is what will happen and all fantasy booking, while infinitely more entertaining, is in vain.

God Of Paradise
Jan 23, 2012
You know, I'd be less worried about my 16 year old daughter dating a successful 40 year old cartoonist than dating a 16 year old loser.

I mean, Jesus, kid, at least date a motherfucker with abortion money and house to have sex at where your mother and I don't have to hear it. Also, if he treats her poorly, boom, that asshole's gonna catch a statch charge.

Please, John K. Date my daughter... Save her from dating smelly dropouts who wanna-be Soundcloud rappers.
So what are we looking at for Mania?

Bryan vs Rock would be a big name match. Don't see it being a good fit, but gently caress it, Rock's no slouch and Bryan can wrestle a good match with anyone who knows the basics.

The title match would benefit from fuckery, like last years title match when they had to fix Batista winning the Rumble. Insert Seth and Ambrose into the match and make it a four way elimination. That might actually be good, and give us 3 out of 4 competitors being over.

No matter what they do with the Mania title match, pretty sure Seth is going to win via post match cash in.

Rusev is gonna be fed to Cena.

Personally, I'd put Sami vs Steen on the card as an opener and give it the time it needs. Sure, we've seen it plenty of times, but it was always good to us, so there would be no complaint.

Trips vs Dolph?

Big Show and Kane vs whatever Tag Team?

Miz vs Sandow?

sticklefifer
Nov 11, 2003

by VideoGames
If Sheamus returns as a heel, I can't wait for the doom metal heel version of 'Written in my Face'.

SoggyBobcat
Oct 2, 2013

Bryan/Lesnar was my dream match, but if they could get the dates down with Rock, Bryan/Rock would be a good alternative I think. I hope it's at least being considered.

MassRafTer
May 26, 2001

BAEST MODE!!!

KungFu Grip posted:

Daniel Bryan sympathy got crowds to boo HBK and cheer HBK getting beaten up, so I'm like 90% sure that Bryan can get the crowd to boo The Rock. Helps that there might be some left over Roman heat on him.

The reactions to HBK weren't super intense and was a good example of how hosed up and stupid that storyline was at that point. HBK isn't close to the star of the Rock and the Rock isn't going to wrestle at Wrestling Mania.

AngryCaterpillar
Feb 1, 2007

I DREW THIS

Captain Magic posted:

Rock goes full Hollywood heel and gets big boos, basically espousing all the corporate reasons why people should love Roman. Roman turns on him, but is busy with Brock. Bryan fights Rock because Rock is corporate or whatever who cares, it's Bryan and Rock. Fans don't poo poo on it because it's a big deal match and Bryan gets an enormous rub when he goes over.

A heel Rock would be best aligned with Seth, just because of the resulting team name.

Action Shakespeare
Mar 25, 2010

TIME magazine's Person of the Year 1996

AngryCaterpillar posted:

A heel Rock would be best aligned with Seth, just because of the resulting team name.

The Torch

Kaveman
Jul 25, 2009

NEVER!!!


I don't see how Rollins doesn't cash in on Lesnar/Reigns and if it's against reigns I don't see how they'll prevent a babyface reception for Seth.

Sanguinia
Jan 1, 2012

~Everybody wants to be a cat~
~Because a cat's the only cat~
~Who knows where its at~

Kaveman posted:

I don't see how Rollins doesn't cash in on Lesnar/Reigns and if it's against reigns I don't see how they'll prevent a babyface reception for Seth.

I'm telling you guys, this Rocky Maivia overpush thing with Reigns is a work, they WANT Rollins to turn face when he cashes in at Mania. YOU ALL THINK I'M CRAZY AND HAVE THE STOCKHOLM SYNDROME BUT MY SOCK PUPPET HAS THE SCOOPS BROTHER.

Oh god I need help :qq:

DEAR RICHARD
Feb 5, 2009

IT'S TIME FOR MY TOOLS
Add Seth Rollins and Daniel Bryan to the match to make it a fatal four way. I can't conceivably see how Roman Reigns has a good match against Lesnar. He hasn't done poo poo since the Shield broke up.

pressedbunny
May 31, 2007

To A Brand New Galaxy
I rewatched Shield-Wyatts from last year's Elimination Chamber recently and it was really striking how much more imposing and more capable Roman seemed then. He's actually more entertaining than Dean or Seth, in that match. He's certainly not been able to keep up that appearance since going solo, though, and as able as Brock is I don't see him being good enough (if he even cares enough) to carry Roman through a match by himself in the same way Dean, Seth, Bray and Harper could all cover for him before.

Benne
Sep 2, 2011

STOP DOING HEROIN
The last time The Rock wrestled he tore up his abdomen and hosed up his film shooting schedule, which I can't imagine the producers were super happy about.

The Rock isn't wrestling this year.

OJ MIST 2 THE DICK
Sep 11, 2008

Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place
Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings
Take up shelter in the base of my spine
Sweet like a chica cherry cola

-Cheap Trick

Nap Ghost

Benne posted:

The last time The Rock wrestled he tore up his abdomen and hosed up his film shooting schedule, which I can't imagine the producers were super happy about.

The Rock isn't wrestling this year.

Rock doesn't have any films currently being shot. The only thing in production right now is a Disney animated movie.

SirDippingSauce
Oct 25, 2012

We're here to interrogate Manly Dan the lumberjack for the murder of wax Stan.

Writer Cath posted:

Yesssssssssss! Yessssssssss! Yessssssssss!

Ophidian?

Benne
Sep 2, 2011

STOP DOING HEROIN

ayn rand hand job posted:

Rock doesn't have any films currently being shot. The only thing in production right now is a Disney animated movie.

He still has a Furious movie to promote and probably doesn't want to be wheelchaired around the red carpet.

Ganso Bomb
Oct 24, 2005

turn it all around

Captain Magic posted:

Rock goes full Hollywood heel and gets big boos, basically espousing all the corporate reasons why people should love Roman. Roman turns on him, but is busy with Brock. Bryan fights Rock because Rock is corporate or whatever who cares, it's Bryan and Rock. Fans don't poo poo on it because it's a big deal match and Bryan gets an enormous rub when he goes over.

Rock leading a dickbag heel stable of Reigns (for the Samoan link) and Miz + a returning Batista (for the actor link) would be incredible. If Roman had someone like The Rock to learn from in that kind of scenario, I think he'd be far better off than any acting coach.

And yes, I know none of that would actually happen but it would be the easiest thing to write. Vince & Co would just need to finally accept who the fans want to see as faces and heels and run with it.

OJ MIST 2 THE DICK
Sep 11, 2008

Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place
Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings
Take up shelter in the base of my spine
Sweet like a chica cherry cola

-Cheap Trick

Nap Ghost

Benne posted:

He still has a Furious movie to promote and probably doesn't want to be wheelchaired around the red carpet.

Fast 7 opens the week after Wrestlemania.

Great cross-promotion.

oldpainless
Oct 30, 2009

This 📆 post brought to you by RAID💥: SHADOW LEGENDS👥.
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DEAR RICHARD posted:

Roman Reigns hasn't done poo poo since the Shield broke up.

He had one good singles match against Randy Orton!!

triplexpac
Mar 24, 2007

Suck it
Two tears in a bucket
And then another thing
I'm not the one they'll try their luck with
Hit hard like brass knuckles
See your face through the turnbuckle dude
I got no love for you

Strawberry Panda posted:

How did Bret Hart get over?

If you're legitimately asking, Bret got over because Vince pushed him. It's pretty simple.

Well actually it's a bit more complex... the only reason he even got the shot was Vince was cornered over the steroid trial and needed to push a "real" athlete, not his usual jacked up muscleman fantasy. So he gave Bret a legitimate shot and Bret got really popular.

It's funny though... comparing Bret and Daniel, you can see them getting the same kind of treatment. Bret won the title in 1992 and had some fun matches, but Vince got itchy for a "big guy" champ and put the title on Yokozuna, then Hogan politicked himself back into a title run. Bret was pushed down the card to feud with Lawler after winning KOTR. Then he'd lose a couple rematches and feud with Owen.

Vince then REALLY found his muscleman dreamboat and strapped a rocket to Lex Luger. That fell apart and Bret got his second world title in 1994.

I wonder, if Lex didn't flop so hard would Bret have ever gotten back to the top?

Edit: Oh and you can't discount WCW stealing guys like Savage, Hogan Nash & Luger away, leaving Vince with only Bret, Shawn, Taker, etc as his dependable workhorses.

triplexpac fucked around with this message at 15:16 on Feb 2, 2015

Gatts
Jan 2, 2001

Goodnight Moon

Nap Ghost
I've watched Wrestling since a kid but why does Vince have such a hard on for giant muscle men? Like not even athletic muscle men. I can understand a Big Show or two For spectacle.

Benne
Sep 2, 2011

STOP DOING HEROIN

Gatts posted:

I've watched Wrestling since a kid but why does Vince have such a hard on for giant muscle men? Like not even athletic muscle men. I can understand a Big Show or two For spectacle.

If a certain image wasn't probatable then I'd give you your answer

Red
Apr 15, 2003

Yeah, great at getting us into Wawa.

triplexpac posted:

I wonder, if Lex didn't flop so hard would Bret have ever gotten back to the top?

I feel like the only way Lex would've made it is if he'd beaten Yokozuna for the title at SummerSlam. If he'd done that, he would've had to face Hart at some point, and the crowd would have clearly let Vince know who they preferred, giving us a very Bryan situation.

All of Bret's title runs were transitional, though.

Title reign #1: Won an untelevised match over Flair, dropped the title to Yokozuna, who dropped it immediately to Hogan.
Title reign #2: Won the WM main event against Yoko after putting over Owen, spent the summer feuding with Owen before dropping the belt to Bob Backlund at Survivor Series, who immediately dropped it to Diesel.
Title reign #3: Won the title from Diesel at Survivor Series after getting destroyed, spent the next few months making Bulldog/Diesel/Undertaker look good good before putting over Shawn.
Title reign #4: Won the title in a four-way mini Rumble, and dropped it 24 hours later to Sycho Sid to set up his program at WM with Undertaker.
Title reign #5: Won the title from Undertaker at SummerSlam with shenanigans, dropped the title in a screwjob to Shawn. In between, he only really defended the title against The Patriot.

elf help book
Aug 5, 2004

Though the battle might be endless, I will never give up

God Of Paradise posted:

Miz vs Sandow?

I imagine they won't do Miz vs Sandow because they want to do Stardust vs Goldust, and they won't do Stardust vs Goldust because they want to do Miz vs Sandow. So, we'll get the Usos vs the New Age Outlaws or something instead.

flashy_mcflash
Feb 7, 2011

Gatts posted:

I've watched Wrestling since a kid but why does Vince have such a hard on for giant muscle men? Like not even athletic muscle men. I can understand a Big Show or two For spectacle.

It's not hard to figure out. WWF broke through on the back of a guy who looked like a superhero, in a decade where Arnold, Sly, Dolph Lundgren, etc were some of the biggest moneymakers in entertainment. Vince's mentality hasn't changed much since then and he's been looking for a new Hogan since the old one left the first time. He only really knows how to make one kind of star.

Fiveace Attorney
Dec 12, 2006

I ain't his friend! If you were to ask me if I was his friend, I would say "NO" to you!

Gatts posted:

I've watched Wrestling since a kid but why does Vince have such a hard on for giant muscle men? Like not even athletic muscle men. I can understand a Big Show or two For spectacle.

Explaining all of vinces complexes would take forever. Its easier to say vince is crazy

jesus WEP
Oct 17, 2004


Red posted:

All of Bret's title runs were transitional, though.
Bret Hart successfully defended his WWF title in the main event of a PPV three times over the course of five reigns.

Gonzo McFee
Jun 19, 2010

DannoMack posted:

Young Michael Hayes was cool and good looking y'all and you can't take that away from him no matter how fat and incompetent he is now.

Michael Hayes was cool in Texas, but so was George W Bush and executing the mentally handicapped.

Onmi
Jul 12, 2013

If someone says it one more time I'm having Florina show up as a corpse. I'm not even kidding, I was pissed off with people doing that shit back in 2010, and I'm not dealing with it now in 2016.
I'm watching the "You think you know me" doc and Edge said a line in regards to the lead in for WM22 that makes me think of now. "The ratings were there, the people wanted to see something different... There was momentum it was just "Ah come on lets do this, why are we sticking straight to plan when we never seem to any other time?""

And really he could have run with the title all the way through to Mania and done big business but had to drop it back because the plan was "Triple H 'puts over' Cena" by constantly calling on the crowd booing him and saying he can't wrestle while Cena lameduck admitted it all and said he had heart and history repeats cause I'm looking at 2015 and going "Why aren't they going with the obviously hot guy who the crowd wants?"

I mean you know time will tell if Roman is better for business but... just drives me nuts.

Minidust
Nov 4, 2009

Keep bustin'

St Evan Echoes posted:

Bret Hart successfully defended his WWF title in the main event of a PPV three times over the course of five reigns.
Haha yeah, like 90% of all title reigns ever could be considered "transitional" depending on how widely you define the term. But I'd say Bret's 4th obviously counts, and the 3rd is arguable (decent length, but even as a young fan I had the impression he was just keeping the belt warm for Shawn).

Anyway, the thing about Bryan getting into the title match is that it wouldn't make any narrative sense at this point. It would be like when Rey Mysterio lost his title shot, then Teddy Long just gifted it back to him anyway because he was a face. Or the main event of WM16 becoming a 4-way because "retired" Foley deserved to have his dream come true. It would give the fans something they want to see, but in a way that makes the hero look ineffectual or (ironically) privileged, rather than like a deserving champion.

^^^^EDIT
whoops, switched the timing of Bret's 3rd and 4th title reigns in my brain before

Minidust fucked around with this message at 16:22 on Feb 2, 2015

Onmi
Jul 12, 2013

If someone says it one more time I'm having Florina show up as a corpse. I'm not even kidding, I was pissed off with people doing that shit back in 2010, and I'm not dealing with it now in 2016.

Minidust posted:

Haha yeah, like 90% of all title reigns ever could be considered "transitional" depending on how widely you define the term. But I'd say Bret's 3rd obviously counts, and the 4th is arguable (decent length, but even as a young fan I had the impression he was just keeping the belt warm for Shawn).

Anyway, the thing about Bryan getting into the title match is that it wouldn't make any narrative sense at this point. It would be like when Rey Mysterio lost his title shot, then Teddy Long just gifted it back to him anyway because he was a face. Or the main event of WM16 becoming a 4-way because "retired" Foley deserved to have his dream come true. It would give the fans something they want to see, but in a way that makes the hero look ineffectual or (ironically) privileged, rather than like a deserving champion.

Well yeah, unless they have Reigns put up the shot or some such, there's no way to do it. Made your bed now burn in it and all.

Ganso Bomb
Oct 24, 2005

turn it all around

Red posted:

All of Bret's title runs were transitional, though.

Title reign #1: Won an untelevised match over Flair, dropped the title to Yokozuna, who dropped it immediately to Hogan.
Title reign #2: Won the WM main event against Yoko after putting over Owen, spent the summer feuding with Owen before dropping the belt to Bob Backlund at Survivor Series, who immediately dropped it to Diesel.
Title reign #3: Won the title from Diesel at Survivor Series after getting destroyed, spent the next few months making Bulldog/Diesel/Undertaker look good good before putting over Shawn.
Title reign #4: Won the title in a four-way mini Rumble, and dropped it 24 hours later to Sycho Sid to set up his program at WM with Undertaker.
Title reign #5: Won the title from Undertaker at SummerSlam with shenanigans, dropped the title in a screwjob to Shawn. In between, he only really defended the title against The Patriot.

Reign #2 sounds more like Backlund was the transitional champ than Bret.

I never looked at his reigns so closely before, but I think it's hard to discount all of them as transitional. #4 was total nonsense so yeah, we can include that. But I don't think he was meant to just be a transitional guy in 1, 3, or 5. Aside from the Screwjob reigh & #4, all of this reigns were 100+ days long.

Gaz-L
Jan 28, 2009
And to be fair, the 'PPV main event' thing sounds bad NOW, but for most of Bret's runs, there were fewer major PPVs, and IYHs didn't always have a title match on top.

BodyMassageMachine
Nov 24, 2006

:yeah:
:yeah:
:yeah:

I was re-watching last year's Rumble, and even though it's not a good match by any real stretch, it's astounding how much better Reigns came across in that match than this year's. He actually has a discernible charisma, the crowd wasn't tired of his moveset yet so they get really excited about the Superman punch and the spear, and he almost comes across as somewhat capable in the ring as a singles guy. If they had pushed him a year ago, a lot of the complaints against him probably would have still surfaced eventually, but he'd likely have a lot more good will on his side.

Also, Punk looked like total poo poo in that match. I wonder if he knew he was leaving the next day, because he certainly looks like he's phoning it in the whole match barring some comedy spots (to be fair, I watched MITB 2011 right before and went from peak-WWE Punk to the end of his tenure).

elf help book
Aug 5, 2004

Though the battle might be endless, I will never give up

BodyMassageMachine posted:

Also, Punk looked like total poo poo in that match. I wonder if he knew he was leaving the next day, because he certainly looks like he's phoning it in the whole match barring some comedy spots (to be fair, I watched MITB 2011 right before and went from peak-WWE Punk to the end of his tenure).

In one of his interview podcasts he said Kofi gave him a concussion during that rumble, when Kofi entered the ring.

Red
Apr 15, 2003

Yeah, great at getting us into Wawa.

St Evan Echoes posted:

Bret Hart successfully defended his WWF title in the main event of a PPV three times over the course of five reigns.

Off the top of my head:

Reign #1: He defended successfully against HBK and Razor at Survivor Series and Royal Rumble
Reign #2: Successfully defended against Owen at SummerSlam
Reign #3: Successfully defended against Bulldog, Taker, and Diesel at IYH: Season's Beatings or something, Royal Rumble, and IYH: Rage in the Cage or some such - both UT and Diesel got screwed out of the title win by the other
Reign #4: no PPV defenses
Reign #5: Successfully defended against The Patriot (Del Wilkes, at least, at IYH: Ground Zero)

So over his entire reign as WWF champ (654 days, via Wikipedia), he had 7 title defense wins on PPV. Only the Patriot match and the Razor match weren't the main event of the show.

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Benne
Sep 2, 2011

STOP DOING HEROIN
It's astounding that they still went through with the table spot when they knew Punk was brain-dead

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