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ibntumart posted:Assuming this is the US or another country under common law, then you're mixing up criminal and civil cases. A private citizen cannot press charges: only the state (usually in the form of a district attorney or US attorney) can do that. Yeah I just mean that sometimes the state itself will sue even if the victim will not. Also nope, not the US 
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Feb 17, 2015 22:30
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Aren't your knees supposed to hurt when you use stairs?
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Feb 17, 2015 22:31
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He's not even using the meme right. How do you make up a story and then not even... ugh. 
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Feb 17, 2015 23:26
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Re assault chat Domestic violence ia usually not the same as assault... in DV cases anyone who caused physical injuries is subject to charges.. cops got tired of pulling couples appart only to come back an hour later to do it again Assault is a bit different I dont think they are required to chsrge if the victem doesnt request it.. ive seen lots of times where they ask if they want to press charges. Source: I watch a fuckton of cops.
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Feb 18, 2015 00:08
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Bonster posted:We use a system called Cholestech at work for health screenings and get the results back in five minutes. It only does very specific things (total, HDL, LDL, triglycerides, blood glucose and total cholesterol/HDL ratio), but it's quick and accurate. Her numbers are within a healthy range according to what my health care provider uses, but mine are better.  Even so, it's totally possible to have cholesterol and BP levels in normal range if you are fat. Only about 70% of obese people have high BP/cholesteral. The problem is that being overweight and staying overweight, especially being obese puts you more at risk for a bunch of health problems, including high cholesterol and high blood pressure. The longer you stay fat, the more likely this stuff will happen because the excess fat is putting a strain on your system. A doctor is not very likely to act the way they did in the story, but they are going to recommend losing weight to someone who is obese, regardless of their current numbers and they will be perfectly right to do that, because regardless of whether you are healthy right NOW, being obese and staying obese all but guarantees some sort of health problem eventually. No doctor is going to look at an obese person and go "Oh your numbers look fine today, so just carry on!"
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Feb 18, 2015 02:06
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quote:A Dashing Hero
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Feb 18, 2015 02:38
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What was the point of adding and forgetting the granddaughter's friend?
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Feb 18, 2015 04:21
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Feb 18, 2015 04:35
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I don't understand what's even happening. The way it's written it sounds like they order some bunch of food and then try to leave? Then the "can I do it just once?" Line is probably a reference to something, then (s)he takes them outside? You'd think that if someone's making up a story anyway they'd bother to make it a little bit coherent.
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Feb 18, 2015 05:02
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I bet she was born in the wrong generation and everything.
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Feb 18, 2015 05:04
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Das Boo posted:What was the point of adding and forgetting the granddaughter's friend? What is the point of any Not Always Right narrative choice, really? I've read some of the raw submissions and the NAR staff's "punch-up" is always a cavalcade of poor editorial decisions.
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Feb 18, 2015 05:17
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jodai posted:I don't understand what's even happening. The way it's written it sounds like they order some bunch of food and then try to leave?
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Feb 18, 2015 05:30
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Tunicate posted:yeah, a dine and dash is when someone eats (shoots) and leaves before paying When and where I grew up it was always called "doing a runner".
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Feb 18, 2015 05:49
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BrigadierSensible posted:When and where I grew up it was always called "doing a runner". My grandparents just told me it was a first degree felony and I'd be drawn and quartered after I was hung.
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Feb 18, 2015 06:06
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"chew and screw"
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Feb 18, 2015 06:07
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Fathis Munk posted:Let's get back to everyone's fav topic : fat people.
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Feb 18, 2015 06:20
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trickybiscuits posted:What is "self-insured"? Is it like "not having insurance"? That's exactly what it is.
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Feb 18, 2015 06:41
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Zaphod42 posted:He's not even using the meme right. How do you make up a story and then not even... ugh. You know if you want to get into the subject of proper meme usage, the confession bear one is used for most stdh on imgur and barely ever the way it's intended too, as most of those stories are just humblebrags. Improper même usage is kinda part of the imgur stdh formula imo.  Haha, yes love that one. The little tumblr reblog talking about ageism makes this one.
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Feb 18, 2015 08:13
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AlbieQuirky posted:"chew and screw" That's East Coast. In California, it's 'dine & dash'. In any event, I'm not sure how the owner's arthritic hands would prevent him from giving chase. Unless he has no feet and walks on his hands, but then he could play Jackie Chan and still get them.
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Feb 18, 2015 09:29
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I think that dine and dash story gave me asterisk poisoning. And I still have no idea what the resolution was supposed to be.
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Feb 18, 2015 10:06
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Mr E posted:I bet she was born in the wrong generation and everything. If she's buying CDs she definitely is.
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Feb 18, 2015 10:19
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Tunicate posted:yeah, a dine and dash is when someone eats (shoots) and leaves before paying I know what that is, especially the panda version. What I meant was the author makes it sound like they take a long time to order and then try to leave before the food comes out. Like the joke is to make people make the food but run away before getting it served to them. Maybe I was just being deliberately obtuse because on another read I can infer what's happening. It's just written really poorly. Here is my attempt to make sense of it: This older lady and two kids try to skip out on a $100 bill. I come into the dining area just in time to see them leaving and grab one of the kids. The old lady doubles back and starts hitting me with her purse. Just as I threaten to call the police, an officer walks in. (This is where I get lost in the narrative) Then I drag them both outside and tell them "Your choice."(I guess indicating either pay the bill or get arrested? That makes sense) The old lady pays up and tips me, the officer laughs the whole time and may very well still be laughing and I got a big reward for just doing my job. I think it's just the horrible dialogue that gives me problems with NAR. Is it really necessary for us to know they have Sierra Mist instead of Sprite?
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Feb 18, 2015 10:50
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jodai posted:I think it's just the horrible dialogue that gives me problems with NAR. Is it really necessary for us to know they have Sierra Mist instead of Sprite? One of the easiest ways to spot if someone's lying is when they include more detail in their story than is necessary.
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Feb 18, 2015 11:03
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And why would someone write "Old Lady: *comes in with her granddaughter and granddaughter’s best friend*" instead of "Two older women walk in with what I assume is their granddaughter"?  And don't forget the *giggling* *laughs* and *smiles in an odd way*, does this waiter never get people who are talking and joking among themselves? Is this some sort of Kafka-esque establishment which forbids laughter or happiness of any kind? "Three people came in laughing and smiling, I knew they were up to something, so I kept my eye on them."
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Feb 18, 2015 11:27
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Jesus christ it's two little girls and one old lady, loving goons.
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Feb 18, 2015 11:44
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walrusman posted:I think that dine and dash story gave me asterisk poisoning. And I still have no idea what the resolution was supposed to be. Yeah I don't get the "Can I do it just once?" thing or what the hell they were trying to describe after that.
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Feb 18, 2015 11:46
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Kimmalah posted:Yeah I don't get the "Can I do it just once?" thing or what the hell they were trying to describe after that. She grabbed them and "swung them outside" or whatever, and that would be assault. So I guess she was asking for permission to commit assault in the presence of a police officer without being arrested? That's all I got.
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Feb 18, 2015 12:16
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Mr E posted:I bet she was born in the wrong generation and everything. She's an old soul godammit!
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Feb 18, 2015 12:54
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jodai posted:I think it's just the horrible dialogue that gives me problems with NAR. Is it really necessary for us to know they have Sierra Mist instead of Sprite? I honestly think that the way a lot of STDH is born is people just start writing the beginning of an interaction, stilted stream-of-consciousness style, until they figure out what they want the antagonist of the story to do. Most STDHs have those long introductions where nothing's really happening yet whereas the whole story can be summed up like how you had it in a simple paragraph without the need to quote everyone's every response in a script form since most of the information is negligible and unnecessary.
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Feb 18, 2015 13:27
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> shit_that_didnt_happen.txt: [My Name], are you having trouble? alternatively, > shit_that_didnt_happen.txt: Oh, H***, no!
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Feb 18, 2015 13:32
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Lowly posted:Her numbers are within a healthy range according to what my health care provider uses, but mine are better. Oh, the numbers are fine (HDL in the first case is a little low, fine the second measure, borderline at any rate, LDL is not great but would be close to 100). She said they were exceptional. They're definitely not, they're just acceptable.
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Feb 18, 2015 15:52
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I think "swing outside" is supposed to mean literally throwing someone like this, but I took me at least 3 readings of that section to figure out what the hell was supposed to be going on. And if its like this, I'd imagine that's also battery since physical harm came to the victims (and even the threat itself to the old woman is assault)
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Feb 18, 2015 16:08
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monny posted:> shit_that_didnt_happen.txt: Oh, H***, no! Sentient Data posted:I think "swing outside" is supposed to mean literally throwing someone like this, but I took me at least 3 readings of that section to figure out what the hell was supposed to be going on. And if its like this, I'd imagine that's also battery since physical harm came to the victims (and even the threat itself to the old woman is assault)
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Feb 18, 2015 16:22
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Sentient Data posted:I think "swing outside" is supposed to mean literally throwing someone like this, but I took me at least 3 readings of that section to figure out what the hell was supposed to be going on. And if its like this, I'd imagine that's also battery since physical harm came to the victims (and even the threat itself to the old woman is assault) I kind of figured it was something like that. It just didn't make much sense to me since the cop knew what they were talking about without explanation, unless they've previously been telling this guy all about their fantasies of kicking out a customer. Also because it looks like they kicked them out of the restaurant before the people paid off the bill, which seems like it would defeat the purpose of the whole thing.
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Feb 18, 2015 16:48
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When I was morbidly obese, no one was ever shocked at my blood pressure being in the normal/low normal range. I also don't think a doctor has taken my blood pressure in my entire life.
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Feb 19, 2015 06:54
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behind bullshit ovens posted:
You kicked his leg forward from the barstool- at the bar- and you had enough force and clearance that he fell backwards. Okay? I don't get why she didn't marry the bartender.
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Feb 19, 2015 17:05
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bringmyfishback posted:You kicked his leg forward from the barstool- at the bar- and you had enough force and clearance that he fell backwards. Okay? That manager sucks. Oh, you want to try your hand at waitressing on our busiest night? Sure, go ahead. Don't bother shadowing someone, just go all in!
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Feb 19, 2015 17:48
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I love how it starts out she's a meek quiet little girl "I'm SOOOOOO nervous!!!" *teehee*  and then starts crying when the big bullies start being mean and needs the owner to rescue her, but then when   It's like a character arc that movies would stretch for years to develop and cultivate, but here it's a few hours. From being physically unable to tell drunk assholes to shut the gently caress up, to physically assaulting them with zero fucks given, truly a miracle. edit: I'm surprised she gave the part of the sick burn ending line "looks like you're the bitch now"  to the bartender, and not herself.
KiddieGrinder has a new favorite as of 18:18 on Feb 19, 2015 |
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Feb 19, 2015 18:12
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bringmyfishback posted:You kicked his leg forward from the barstool- at the bar- and you had enough force and clearance that he fell backwards. Okay? This bothered me a lot too on reading it, how is this supposed to work ? 
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Feb 19, 2015 21:46
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Nothing about that sounds particularly stdh to me, a bit self-congratulatory what with the meme and all but like you know
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Feb 19, 2015 21:51
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