RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

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Migishu: Oct 22, 2005; I'll eat your fucking eyeballs if you're not careful; Grimey Drawer

anthonypants posted:

and this one is from about a month ago

RE: a ticket came in... I NEED TECH SUPPORT

Swink posted:

On the topic of training, I have to record some training vids for our processes. What is a good screen recording software for windows?

Cam studio is filled with spyware these days.

We use Snagit here. Works pretty well if you know how to use it.

I, personally, use OBS (local recording) because I'm an idiot, but it works so...

# ? Mar 11, 2015 16:49

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# ? Jun 4, 2024 01:03

Fil5000: Jun 23, 2003; HOLD ON GUYS I'M POSTING ABOUT INTERNET ROBOTS

hihifellow posted:

Requirements for a web application that another department wants to use came across my desk;

OH HELL NO

Edit: req sheet recommends not using netscape since AOL no longer supports it. Did they send me an ancient sheet by mistake

Is your office bigger on the inside than on the outside? If so, I think you may have hit a switch on your desk by mistake.

# ? Mar 11, 2015 16:50

BaseballPCHiker: Jan 16, 2006

So many tickets come in from our idiot sales force. Why these people cant be responsible adults and remember their passwords is beyond me. Seriously so many password reset calls. We've implemented Okta for single sign on so for %90 of their logins they only have to remember ONE password but that's to much for them. I'm at a complete loss of what to do now but I know looking at our metrics that our helpdesk team spends way to much time on piddily crap like this.

Has anyone used or heard of some sort of forgot password type service that would work for AD accounts or is this a totally bad idea on my part? I'd love it if I could setup some kind of portal to have them answer their security questions and get a password reset link mailed to them or something similar to that. It'd be great to just tell the user go here and fix it yourself. Although I'm sure we'd have a couple idiots who manage to forget their security answers too.

# ? Mar 11, 2015 17:01

GreenNight: Feb 19, 2006; Turning the light on the darkest places, you and I know we got to face this now. We got to face this now.

We have a field sales force too and they won't use it. They'll bitch to their managers that you're making it more difficult to get work done. Why can't he just reset my password???????

# ? Mar 11, 2015 17:02

ponzicar: Mar 17, 2008

BaseballPCHiker posted:

So many tickets come in from our idiot sales force. Why these people cant be responsible adults and remember their passwords is beyond me. Seriously so many password reset calls. We've implemented Okta for single sign on so for %90 of their logins they only have to remember ONE password but that's to much for them. I'm at a complete loss of what to do now but I know looking at our metrics that our helpdesk team spends way to much time on piddily crap like this.

Has anyone used or heard of some sort of forgot password type service that would work for AD accounts or is this a totally bad idea on my part? I'd love it if I could setup some kind of portal to have them answer their security questions and get a password reset link mailed to them or something similar to that. It'd be great to just tell the user go here and fix it yourself. Although I'm sure we'd have a couple idiots who manage to forget their security answers too.

"I forgot the answers to my security questions: please reset!"

I don't mind resetting passwords, but the people who can't understand making a new one that meets the complexity requirements I am baffled by. Uppercase, lowercase, and numbers should not be difficult for a literate adult to type in.

ponzicar fucked around with this message at 17:06 on Mar 11, 2015

# ? Mar 11, 2015 17:03

Mustache Ride: Sep 11, 2001

BaseballPCHiker posted:

So many tickets come in from our idiot sales force. Why these people cant be responsible adults and remember their passwords is beyond me. Seriously so many password reset calls. We've implemented Okta for single sign on so for %90 of their logins they only have to remember ONE password but that's to much for them. I'm at a complete loss of what to do now but I know looking at our metrics that our helpdesk team spends way to much time on piddily crap like this.

Has anyone used or heard of some sort of forgot password type service that would work for AD accounts or is this a totally bad idea on my part? I'd love it if I could setup some kind of portal to have them answer their security questions and get a password reset link mailed to them or something similar to that. It'd be great to just tell the user go here and fix it yourself. Although I'm sure we'd have a couple idiots who manage to forget their security answers too.

We use Microsoft's Forefront Identity Manager for this, but it wasn't easy to set up. Then again, we've got 45k+ users so if you're smaller it might be simple. Who knows!

# ? Mar 11, 2015 17:18

Feline Mind Meld: Jun 14, 2007; I'm pretty creeped out

drat I wish I weren't late to hot-sauce chat as I have a relevant story.

Friend's parent is a lawyer (I know, I know, but she's really nice even if she's not a computer guru). She was eating at her desk and noticed some time after she though she was done eating that there was Nutella all over her hand and subsequently all up in her mouse/keyboard. A ticket later and the keyboard was apparently saved with some wiping, but the IT guy was taking her mouse away and she asked if he was going to fix it. Reply was "don't worry about it" and she now has a new mouse.

I don't know how you can not notice your hand is covered in peanut butter equivalent but at least she was embarassed by it.

# ? Mar 11, 2015 18:44

Siochain: May 24, 2005; "can they get rid of any humans who are fans of shitheads like Kanye West, 50 Cent, or any other piece of crap "artist" who thinks they're all that?

And also get rid of anyone who has posted retarded shit on the internet."

Well, that was an amusing call.

:downs:

Hello, yes, I was a user of your software a couple of years ago. I'm using competing_company_A's software, and its really not working well. Their support is horrible, do you think you could help me with it?
:eng99:

No, sir, I'm sorry, none of us here are familiar with that software, and that's well beyond our support scope
:downs:

Well that's a terrible answer, you really should treat former clients better <hangs up>

I really hate people some days.

# ? Mar 11, 2015 19:06

stubblyhead: Sep 13, 2007; That is treason, Johnny!; Fun Shoe

Swink posted:

On the topic of training, I have to record some training vids for our processes. What is a good screen recording software for windows?

Cam studio is filled with spyware these days.

If you just need screenshots then psr.exe is the way to go. The only caveat there is that they're not very easy to modify after the fact, so stray clicks can be hard to eliminate. Supposedly the output files are natively editable in Word, but Office 365 wouldn't open it. For full video w/ sound and poo poo, I've used BB Flashback with good results. The free version is pretty decent, but I think you need the full version to get acceptable conversion into other video formats.

# ? Mar 11, 2015 19:08

Gerdalti: May 24, 2003; SPOON!

Gerdalti posted:

Got a fun one from a new Exec VP this morning
code:
from: VP
to: ME
CC: CEO
Subject: Email Problems
I'm not getting CEO's emails. She sent them to me, and I never got them, she re-sent them and I didn't get those either. 
So I open up CEO's mailbox, check the last 8 sent messages to VP. Open up VP's mailbox, find them literally deleted. Not "in deleted items", but deleted from deleted items. Thanks OWA for letting me see them.
code:
from: ME
to: VP
CC: CEO (Yeah, I reply all, don't blame me for your stupidity)
Subject: Re: Email Problems
Did a little digging, I see a lot of emails from CEO to you have been deleted (all the way deleted) in your mailbox. 
You didn't actually provide any details of when or what those emails are, so here is a screenshot of the last 8 emails from CEO that you've deleted. 
::ScreenShot::
Can you provide more details? Do you need assistance recovering these emails? 
No one has replied yet, this was all 5 hours ago. Someone is probably having a not-so-fun conversation with the CEO.

Got a followup email from VP today:

code:

These were emails from me (VP) to CEO and not from CEO to me (VP).  
I believe she (CEO) sent them around 1 PM, but then resent them again this morning at around 8:30 AM.

# ? Mar 11, 2015 19:26

m.hache: Dec 1, 2004; Fun Shoe

Gerdalti posted:

Got a followup email from VP today:

code:

These were emails from me (VP) to CEO and not from CEO to me (VP).  
I believe she (CEO) sent them around 1 PM, but then resent them again this morning at around 8:30 AM.

Time to send him logs.

Never try to blame the tech.

# ? Mar 11, 2015 19:41

Bhodi: Dec 9, 2007; Oh, it's just a cat.; Pillbug

Nothing gets someone to backpedal faster than the words

"Our logs show..."

# ? Mar 11, 2015 19:42

anthonypants: May 6, 2007; by Nyc_Tattoo; Dinosaur Gum

He already sent a screenshot, though.

# ? Mar 11, 2015 20:42

Cheradenine: May 29, 2009

anthonypants posted:

He already sent a screenshot, though.

*La La La, can't hear you*

# ? Mar 11, 2015 20:49

BOOTY-ADE: Aug 30, 2006; BIG KOOL TELLIN' Y'ALL TO KEEP IT TIGHT

Gerdalti posted:

Got a followup email from VP today:

code:

These were emails from me (VP) to CEO and not from CEO to me (VP).  
I believe she (CEO) sent them around 1 PM, but then resent them again this morning at around 8:30 AM.

Let me guess - he didn't include CEO on the chain when he replied to you with this? :allears:

# ? Mar 12, 2015 01:41

FISHMANPET: Mar 3, 2007; Sweet 'N Sour
Can't
Melt
Steel Beams

So I'm confused, they're emails the VP sent or emails the CEO sent? Because the VP is claiming both.

# ? Mar 12, 2015 01:47

Sheep: Jul 24, 2003

FISHMANPET posted:

So I'm confused, they're emails the VP sent or emails the CEO sent? Because the VP is claiming both.

Whichever they can blame on Gerdalti.

# ? Mar 12, 2015 02:57

NZAmoeba: Feb 14, 2005; It turns out it's MAN!; Hair Elf

FISHMANPET posted:

So I'm confused, they're emails the VP sent or emails the CEO sent? Because the VP is claiming both.

yes

# ? Mar 12, 2015 03:05

anthonypants: May 6, 2007; by Nyc_Tattoo; Dinosaur Gum

FISHMANPET posted:

So I'm confused, they're emails the VP sent or emails the CEO sent? Because the VP is claiming both.

I'm not the computers guy, poindexter. Just figure out where those missing emails went!

# ? Mar 12, 2015 03:24

neogeo0823: Jul 4, 2007; NO THAT'S NOT ME!!

Sheep posted:

Whichever they can blame on Gerdalti.

This. Gerdalti already CYA'd one way, now he's just gotta CYA the other way and he's set. Though yeah, the VP did at first claim that it was emails sent to him from the CEO and then claim the opposite. Hopefully it gets the VP into even bigger trouble after he tries to say "Oh, well maybe the emails just DISAPPEARED, huh??" and then Gerdalti figures out that he sent them to some client or something.

# ? Mar 12, 2015 03:28

Renegret: May 26, 2007; THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*

Cat Army Sworn Enemy

NZAmoeba posted:

yes

You are triggering me so hard

# ? Mar 12, 2015 03:38

Sheep: Jul 24, 2003

Renegret posted:

You are triggering me so hard

I involuntarily twitched when I read that reply.

# ? Mar 12, 2015 04:23

Gerdalti: May 24, 2003; SPOON!

I'm fairly certain you guys are all correct. None of it makes sense and I'm a trained cya'er. I'll report back and let you know what happens tomorrow, should be fun either way.

# ? Mar 12, 2015 04:56

Technical Analysis: Nov 21, 2007; I got 99 problems but the British ain't one.

I can't wait to hear how this one goes.

# ? Mar 12, 2015 08:03

GreenNight: Feb 19, 2006; Turning the light on the darkest places, you and I know we got to face this now. We got to face this now.

Stop entrapping the VP with logs, how dare you.

# ? Mar 12, 2015 12:01

The Claptain: May 11, 2014; Grimey Drawer

A questionnaire came in.

Client, whose IT infrastructure we're in charge of, has recieved VISA Due Dilligence Questionnare. Twelve pages of security audit.

Coworker who is on-site does not have access to all systems, and doesn't know answers to all questions, so he has naturally sent it to me, because I just love this sort of paperwork :suicide:

Filled it in, I don't have high hopes.

# ? Mar 12, 2015 14:20

Rhymenoserous: May 23, 2008

Tigern posted:

I believe the "Oh that will never happen to me" mentality is to blame here. I've heard so many people talk about how low the chances of getting infected with crypto-variants are. It's baffling to me.

We got hit with it here, I just mounted up a snapshot of the day before the datestamps on the "How to unlock" garbage and restored it all. It was a pain in the rear end, but not really a huge one.

# ? Mar 12, 2015 16:23

Entropic: Feb 21, 2007; patriarchy sucks

hihifellow posted:

Requirements for a web application that another department wants to use came across my desk;

OH HELL NO

Edit: req sheet recommends not using netscape since AOL no longer supports it. Did they send me an ancient sheet by mistake

They're just checking to see if you actually read the sheet.

# ? Mar 12, 2015 17:59

chemosh6969

Jul 3, 2004

code:
cat /dev/null > /etc/professionalism

_{_{I am in fact a massive asswagon.

Do not let me touch computer.}}

Anyone else know the story The Monkey's Paw? I work in some weird office where nobody has heard of it.

I'm trying to find a gif of a monkey paw closing because I get some requests where I tell them may happen if I fulfill their request but if they're really sure, I can do it. When they respond back saying they want me to do it, I feel the need to respond back with the paw closing.

# ? Mar 12, 2015 18:18

ElGroucho: Nov 1, 2005; We already - What about sticking our middle fingers up... That was insane; Fun Shoe

I... I just taught one of my coworkers to use powershell, but I think I may have unleashed a terrible evil on the world

# ? Mar 12, 2015 18:21

notwithoutmyanus: Mar 17, 2009

FISHMANPET posted:

So I'm confused, they're emails the VP sent or emails the CEO sent? Because the VP is claiming both.

Ha, I had a less painful conversation this morning with me and my colleague re: monitoring Azure VM's (trigger warning again):

:science:

IT colleague: "So, when you are monitoring these VM's do you need an IP or a hostname?"
Me: "Yes". :smugdog:

(laughter). So which one is it?
:smugdog:

"Either one, technically". (we have some azure VM's with IP reservation, so technicalities).

# ? Mar 12, 2015 18:21

m.hache: Dec 1, 2004; Fun Shoe

chemosh6969 posted:

Anyone else know the story The Monkey's Paw? I work in some weird office where nobody has heard of it.

I'm trying to find a gif of a monkey paw closing because I get some requests where I tell them may happen if I fulfill their request but if they're really sure, I can do it. When they respond back saying they want me to do it, I feel the need to respond back with the paw closing.

You could also send the youtube video of the paw.

# ? Mar 12, 2015 18:24

Oswald Kesselpot: Jan 14, 2008; HONK HONK HONK

Gerdalti posted:

I'm fairly certain you guys are all correct. None of it makes sense and I'm a trained cya'er. I'll report back and let you know what happens tomorrow, should be fun either way.

I predict that the resolution will end with the CEO saying "as long as its working now", and no one will ever think of it again; except in 3 months while in a staff meeting the VP will comment on how IT lost his email when he first started.

# ? Mar 12, 2015 18:29

22 Eargesplitten: Oct 10, 2010

The second one, but edit it so that it's the middle finger that stays up.

# ? Mar 12, 2015 18:29

chemosh6969

Jul 3, 2004

code:
cat /dev/null > /etc/professionalism

_{_{I am in fact a massive asswagon.

Do not let me touch computer.}}

m.hache posted:

You could also send the youtube video of the paw.

That works, thanks. The middle finger would also be useful.

What drove me over the edge to ask was an email that was basically "How can something that's been fixed, still be rejected" and this supervisor not being able to come up with the fact that if you don't fix everything, it's not fixed. It's not the first time this has come up and I've drawn it all out in ms paint before in the past to illustrate the point.

# ? Mar 12, 2015 19:27

MF_James: May 8, 2008; I CANNOT HANDLE BEING CALLED OUT ON MY DUMBASS OPINIONS ABOUT ANTI-VIRUS AND SECURITY. I REALLY LIKE TO THINK THAT I KNOW THINGS HERE

INSTEAD I AM GOING TO WHINE ABOUT IT IN OTHER THREADS SO MY OPINION CAN FEEL VALIDATED IN AN ECHO CHAMBER I LIKE

NZAmoeba posted:

yes

Must... not... stab...

# ? Mar 12, 2015 19:34

neogeo0823: Jul 4, 2007; NO THAT'S NOT ME!!

A ticket came in....

From my CEO. He uses Outlook, and he's got an image and some text in his signature. When he emails or replies to people inside the company, the signature shows up just fine. However, when he replies to emails from people outside of the company, the text of his signature will show up, but not the image. I haven't confirmed if the recipient can see the image, I just know that he can't see it when he goes to view the email he wrote. Anyone have any ideas on what to do here?

EDIT: Nevermind. My google-fu actually came through for once. He's replying to plain-text emails, which can't display the image. He's fine with that as long as it's not a problem on his end, so hooray, points for me on a lovely week. :unsmith: