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Death Zebra
May 14, 2014

I can't remember. Can you do anything heinous in the dwarven origins like you can in the city elf origin?

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Wayne
Oct 18, 2014

He who fights too long against dragons becomes a dragon himself

kalonZombie posted:

I love winning the hat in this as a rogue because you can't even wear it. It's great.

You can if you put all your points in Strength. (You start with 13 and get 5 to spend.) It's not even necessarily a bad plan given the item you can find at the end of the origin, and it boosts your Attack with one-handed weapons, which are going to be better than daggers at the start (especially if you can't/don't want to backstab all the time).

Inferior posted:

[If you're a male dwarf you can have a threesome with the two noble hunters, and get one of them pregnant in the process. Oops.]

Is it really an "oops" when their handwave of why women do that is to create more legitimate noble warriors? I may have misunderstood, but I got the impression that it was a big rules exploit: the laws say casteless can't fight, the darkspawn keep the number of proper warriors down, you can't change the ancestors' laws, but you need more soldiers, so what do? Allow and encourage "noble hunting"! If you're a noble male dwarf, it really is your duty to get that booty.

And I applaud your attention to detail. :golfclap: I never bothered looking at the description of that dagger, so I missed it was Made in Antiva. That's pretty great. Makes you wonder if it was intentional (the merchant's lying to you) or a copy-and-paste error (which would normally be my guess, but I don't think there are any other noble's daggers in the game).

Inferior
Oct 19, 2012

Death Zebra posted:

I can't remember. Can you do anything heinous in the dwarven origins like you can in the city elf origin?
You can have Gorim rough up or murder several people for trivial offenses when wandering around the Diamond Quarter, but that's practically expected for a noble. There's some other stuff which we'll get to later.

Inferior
Oct 19, 2012

PART 4: MO' MONEY, MO' PROBLEMS

Previously posted:

Having just won the Proving, Bianca Aeducan heads to the feast being held in her honor. But dwarven politics can complicate even the simplest events..




Time to get presented to the nobles.

Perhaps you should have a servant clean your armor first.

Nah. A little blood always impresses the stuffed shirts.





Those humans look like Grey Wardens.

The raid tomorrow must be more than a standard mission. The Wardens only go where the darkspawn are the greatest threat.

Who cares? Look at all the cheese and booze! It's going to be a good night.

[Cheese seems to be very popular in Thedas. Cheese wheels show up everywhere, in all three games. See how many you can spot!]

My Lady Aeducan, might I bother you for a moment?



Many thanks for your willingness to hear me out, my lady.

I wish to speak to you of a matter most urgent.

Gorim, how much time do I have?

It looks as if the heads of House Bemot and Meino are keeping your father busy.

Which leaves you plenty of time for our dear old friend, Lord Dace.



You're a credit to your race caste, Ser Gorim. I've always said so. If I had a daughter, I'd give her to you and make you the noble you deserve to be.

You honor me, my lord.

He's mocking you, Gorim.

Gosh, really? You don't say. Etc.

What? I would never do such a thing!

Indeed. I know, I just can't resist teasing him.

(Laughs) You're a clever one, always have been. That's why I'm hoping for your help.

All right, go ahead.



First, let me congratulate you on your commission.

Two of King Endrin's children now commissioned war-leaders. It does great honor to your house.

You didn't stop me to exchange pleasantries.

Ha. No, I surely did not.

Let us just pretend we spent another ten minutes wishing good things on each other's houses, yes?

There is a vote coming before the assembly next week, and a word from you could go a long way towards helping our cause.

I'm going to regret this but... What cause?


[do you trust this man?]

The vote concerns the status of the so-called surface caste. Lost to the Stone, air-touched, and so forth.

”Air-touched” is the dumbest term. We're all air-touched. We'd be dead otherwise.

Centuries ago, narrow-minded men declared that any dwarf who left to live on the surface forfeited his caste and his house if noble. That he was, in essence, no longer a dwarf.

I seek only to remedy an injustice, to retie the bonds of anyone who can trace himself to one of the noble houses, wherever he may live.

Please, agree to speak for this noble cause.

What selfless devotion you show to the less fortunate, Lord Dace.

Ahahahahahaha!

No, seriously, why this particular cause?



Those on the surface are our lifeline. They facilitate trade with the surface. They're honorable and... um...

:sigh: Let's be honest, I don't care a whit for those who have wandered from the Stone. My wife, however, is a gem of a different color.

She has a cousin, a useless sort, but she is quite fond of him. He joined a speculative venture to the surface, hoping to make his fortune and went bust.

Now he wishes to come home, but he cannot for he has no house and would be casteless. For my wife's sake, I take us his cause. Will you lend me your voice?

Much as I love fixing other people's marriages, what do I get in return?



I keep my ears to the Stone, my lady.

I hear many things, some of which could be of great help during your mission tomorrow. A little forewarning to your forearming, if you know what I mean.

I want hard currency, not rumors.

Saving for a run for the Assembly? Never mind, if hard currency is what you wish, hard currency is what you will have.

How does a hundred sovereigns sound?

:woop: ...I mean, sounds good. What can I do?



When your father presents you to the noble houses, I will ask for your opinion on the matter.

You have merely to say that you feel our surface brothers should be returned their noble rights.

What could be more simple?



[If you thought that all sounded as suspicious as gently caress, you'd be right. Fortunately someone's about to explain Dwarf Politics for Dummies.]

You're a fool.



Your mother would melt the Stone if she knew what you just did.

:colbert:

Gorim, did you hear something?

I'm staying out of this, my lady.

Do not mock me, girl.

Lord Dace is playing you false. Go ahead, be his puppet. Your first command will be marked by every major house turning their back on you.



If you have something to say, do so.

If you are to play in the games of the Assembly, make sure you know the motivations of the players.

Last spring, a guild from the Merchant caste invested heavily in an expedition with a guild from the surface.

Lord Dace backed this merchant guild, pouring a great deal of money into the venture. The expedition was a disaster.

So this is Lord Dace's play to recover his losses?

Clever child.



Lord Dace lost a great deal of money and prestige.

The surface guild has no way to repay the investment. But it does have several leading members who are descended from noble houses.

House Helmi, Bemot... Aeducan.

If the surface dwellers returned to their noble houses...

You begin to see the whole picture.

Not really. I was just trying to speed this conversation along.



Hmph. I will cease insinuating and just spell everything out then, shall I?

Please. If we don't hurry this up, Lord Bemot will have finished off all the roast nug.

Your house and mine would be forced to pay the surfacer's kin debts. It would be a great victory for Lord Dace.

But standing up for the surfacers is the right thing to do. Also profitable.

The surface caste gave up their noble ties willingly, generations ago. Will you humiliate your house and your father, for them?

I think we have different definitions of “willingly”. I'll think about it.

Well, don't think too long.



...



...OK, I'm done thinking.

Are you going to confront Lord Dace?

Nah. Helping the surfacers is the right thing to do, regardless of Dace's motives.

Also: 100 sovereigns Gorim.

It does focus the mind. Shall we speak to the humans now?



Greetings, my Lady Aeducan.

[Hey, it's the guy from the introduction!]

It is an honor to meet you at last.

At last? Have you been waiting for me?

Not as such, but your father never misses a chance to boast of your skill and bravery.

:allears:

He says you may be the quickest fighter in all of House Aeducan.

There is no may about it, I am the best.

Ha! Yes, he mentioned your humble nature as well.



We need more Grey Wardens like you. And quickly.

Even as the darkspawn weaken here in Orzammar, they are stirring on the surface. A Blight has begun.

Soon the fight must go beyond the Deep Roads, lest the darkspawn threaten all the world.

Good. Let them leave our city and pester the humans.

No one is safe from a Blight. If the darkspawn overrun the surface lands they will return in even greater numbers.

Orzammar would perish along with the rest. None of our lands is truly self-sufficicent.

Great, my promotion came just in time for the end of the world.



I do not know as much as I should about the Grey Wardens. I slept through the intro cinematic.

You know of our dedication to destroying the darkspawn, our frontline presence during the Blights, our impeccable dress sense. What else would you know?

Are there many of my people in the Grey Wardens?

Over the centuries, many dwarves have made names for themselves in our order.

These days, however, there are fewer dwarves and thus even fewer dwarven Grey Wardens.

A pity, since dwarven warriors have the most experience fighting darkspawn.

What does joining entail?



Being a Grey Warden means abandoning all ties to your old life. It means dedicating yourself to destroying the darkspawn.

I don't think I could bear such a difficult life.

Then it is a good thing that you have other paths before you. Some are not so lucky.

But I am sure none of this information will ever be relevant to you, and that this will be the only time we speak.

I wish you luck in the Deep Roads tomorrow. Show the darkspawn the might of your people.



Gloomy old sod, wasn't he?

I don't think the Wardens look for raconteurs when recruiting.



My king, please reconsider. The trade contracts alone could bring great prosperity to our houses...

Will we really turn out backs on our brothers and a potential fortune in cheap labor because of a political technicality?

Denial of the traditions of our people does not qualify as a political technicality!



There is more to life than monetary gains, my lords Bemot and Meino. The Assembly of Kal Sharok will respect the rule of Orzammar, or they will rot and die alone, surrounded by enemies.

[Kal Sharok is the only other surviving dwarven city. As Orzammar was the capital of the old Dwarven Empire, Kal Sharok should be subservient. *Should*.]

Yes, my King.

But look, we have company to spare us further wrangling.



Atrast vala, my sweet daughter. How fine you look in your grandmother's armor.

Dear old Grandma. Always ready with a kind word or thrown axe.

I hear you were declared champion of the Provings! (Chuckles) I suppose you were never one to sit by when something exciting was going on.

Are you ready to be presented to the heads of the noble houses?

Well, if I must.

These rituals have their place. It behooves you to get to know the nobles and let them know you.



Lords, ladies. Grant me a moment of your time.

Who would pose a question to the prospective commander? Who seeks to know the prospect better?

I have a question. I seek to know the prospect better.

Lord Dace, head of House Dace, speak.



Lords, ladies, my question concerns the plight of our wayward kin, the so-called surface caste.

What does the commander prospect think is the proper place for these lost souls?

They are as we are, and should have their rights returned.

:monocle:

Thank you, my lady. I am satisfied.

Then if there are no other challenges...

I give you Orzammar's next commander!



*CHEER!*

Wow, that was easy.

Tomorrow, our newest commander will lead part of a mission to strike a great blow to the darkspawn.

Not only does this recover access to some of our most important mines, but it also allows our honored guest Duncan, head of Ferelden's Grey Wardens, to strike far into the Deep Roads.



Thank you, King Endrin. While the darkspawn seem to withdraw, it is only because they are massing on the surface. This could mean a Blight, and my men and I will discover the truth.

We are honored to have you with us, my friend.

Now, feast, drink and celebrate, for the morning brings battle!



As for you, my new commander, find your brother Trian, and send him to me.

He may be watching the Provings, or getting some rest in his rooms.

Can't you send a servant? We have enough of them.

Don't question everything. Just go, for the ancestor's sake.

That doesn't answer my--



Oh, forget it. Best get my payment from Dace before he sneaks away.



That was well spoken.

Am I going to regret helping you?

I sincerely hope not.

So, “yes” then.

:shrug: Here is a note of credit for the hundred sovereigns. The chamberlain at my estates will pay you after the battle tomorrow.

Now, I must be off to prepare for tomorrow. Do excuse me.



:swoon:

[A hundred sovereigns is a lot of money. A lot of money. Enough to buy everything worth buying in every shop in the game.

But if you do what Dace said and hold on to the note until “tomorrow”, you will never get a chance to cash it in. This is due to Plot.]



[So you need to go sell it to a merchant. Right now. Go to see your brother like Dad suggested and you will lose the note forever.]



[Most vendors only offer 25% of an item's worth when selling.

25% of a shitload of money is still an awful lot of money though. The 25 gold will set us up for a good loooong time.]



[So, that's why we went along with Dace's plan, despite everyone telling us what a bad idea it was. Also these nobles now think we're an idiot.

We could have simply said no to his scheme, or said yes and then publicly humiliated Dace, or demanded House Dace make amends because the Lord's lying ways offended our dwarven honor. The last option has you fighting and killing Dace's son in the arena.

Dwarven dinner parties are intense is what I'm saying.]



Trian! Trian!! Where are you, you useless...





So, you are a commander now. In name at least.

Shouldn't you be attending our father?

You two weren't at the feast.

The world does not stop and start with your meager achievements. Not even tonight.

Now, do you have some purpose in bothering us?

Father is worried you're too much of an rear end to be prince.

You push your luck



Bhelen, get to bed. We have a big day tomorrow. I will see what our father wishes from his heir.



All day I've put up with that. He can really grate on the nerves.

I agree. I'd probably use stronger phrasing though.

And what I'm going to say next won't make you any more fond of him.

You sound serious, Bhelen.

Unfortunately, I am.



Trian has begun to move against you.

I never thought his much-proclaimed honor would allow him to actually act on his jealousy.

Big sister, Trian is going to try to kill you.

[CUE OMINOUS MUSIC]

...How do you know?

I overheard him giving orders to some of his men, and I was shocked. Then it began to make sense.

Trian's decided you're a threat to him taking the throne. Maybe he's right.



How am I a threat to Trian?

He fears what you are becoming, in the eyes of the people and the Assembly.

Trian's the named prince, but only the Assembly can proclaim a king.

I'm glad today's the day everyone decided to explain how society works, else I'd be really confused.

It would be unusual for the Assembly to ignore the king's choice, but it does happen.

The founder of House Bemot became a Paragon and king in one move from the Assembly, and he was a commoner.



That was an extraordinary case. But at least a half-dozen times, the Assembly named a lesser family member--or even someone from another house--as king.

Twice, it was a woman.

So, Trian thinks the Assembly would prefer me?

Look at it from his perspective. You're more personable than he's ever been.

You entered the Provings held in your own honor, just for glory and to please the crowd.

And for a sweet hat.

Whatever. If you win glory against the darkspawn tomorrow, it will only strengthen the case for you as next heir...



Trian fears Father will replace him on the spot. If not, the Assembly will surely turn against him when Father dies.

You know his pride will never allow him to step aside.

That, and he's an rear end in a top hat.

That too.

What's your angle in this?

It seems Trian has shown that brother's can't always be trusted.

I am next in line. If Trian succeeds, how long do you think I'll live?

Hrrrmm. Gorim, what do you say?



Permission to speak freely?

I asked, didn't I?

Trian would be a terrible king, but no one wants to say it.

He has enough backing in the Assembly to make it ugly when your father dies, but not enough to become king.

Killing him now makes your house stronger and saves a great deal of bloodshed later.

...Hm.


VOTE TIME!
Do we kill our brother?
YES- He is horrible and would be a bad king and also we would get to be in charge.
NO- Murdering family members is wrong! Even the ones trying to kill us.


NEXT TIME: Mission to the Unknown.

NEW CODEX CONTENT:
King Endrin Aeducan
House Aeducan, Shield of Orzammar

Inferior fucked around with this message at 15:28 on Oct 27, 2019

Zanziabar
Oct 31, 2010
:woop: :woop: That's right people, 25 Gold Now we've got 99 problems but gold ain't one.

Kinslaying is bad, how would we look in front of our ancestors? No

SubponticatePoster
Aug 9, 2004

Every day takes figurin' out all over again how to fuckin' live.
Slippery Tilde
Hell yes, kill that motherfucker. It's really just preemptive self defense anyway.

Poil
Mar 17, 2007

Kill! Crush! Rip him limb from limb! :black101:

Brunom1
Sep 5, 2011

Ask me about being the best dad ever.
Don't kill him!

That would be letting blondie off easy - wreck his assassination attempt and send him to the mines! :black101:

berenzen
Jan 23, 2012

Don't Kill Him

You're a dwarven noble, you don't get your hands dirty, you dirty someone else's hands and profit off of the ensuing chaos.

Schwartzcough
Aug 12, 2009

Don't tease the Octopus, kids!
Don't kill him. How would kinslaying look to the Assembly? Nah, just foil his plan and then let him impotently lose his place as heir.

Asator
Oct 21, 2010

No. Humiliation is always better than outright killing.
Let him prove his own fears true.

SgtSteel91
Oct 21, 2010

No

Don't kill him, but try to foil his plans.

kalonZombie
May 24, 2010

D&D 3.5 Book of Erotic Fantasy
Kill him.

Ghandi once said "Eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind", but Ghandi didn't have to deal with dwarven politics.

Abhorrence
Feb 5, 2010

A love that crushes like a mace.
Murder Death Kill!

It's survival of the fittest down here with the dwarves!

Death Zebra
May 14, 2014

I vote to kill as always.

Aces High
Mar 26, 2010

Nah! A little chocolate will do




I'm gonna vote kill since I haven't exercised that option myself :v:

FoolyCharged
Oct 11, 2012

Cheating at a raffle? I sentence you to 1 year in jail! No! Two years! Three! Four! Five years! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Somebody call for an ant?

Kill
Because if he is making a run on our life, he's already dead anyways we might as well be honest about things.

e: and also because more games need fratricide.

mauman
Jul 30, 2014

Whoever's got the biggest whiskers does the talking.
Yep, if you play your cards right, the Dwarven Noble can start with nearly 30 Gold.

That's a massive amount. A down right SILLY amount for this period of time.

Part one of "Why Dwarven Noble is easy mode" has just concluded.

Also, Don't Kill We're supposed to be some sort of female Tyrion. The Oldest bro might be a jerk, but he ain't no Joffrey.

kalonZombie
May 24, 2010

D&D 3.5 Book of Erotic Fantasy

mauman posted:

Also, Don't Kill We're supposed to be some sort of female Tyrion. The Oldest bro might be a jerk, but he ain't no Joffrey.

Yet.

Tiggum
Oct 24, 2007

Your life and your quest end here.


Don't kill him. Much funnier to leave him alive but utterly defeated.

drkeiscool
Aug 1, 2014
Soiled Meat
Wait, aren't you Chaotic Good? Doesn't that preclude murdering your sibling?

Tiggum
Oct 24, 2007

Your life and your quest end here.


drkeiscool posted:

Wait, aren't you Chaotic Good? Doesn't that preclude murdering your sibling?

Not if it's for the greater good, surely?

Mr. Baps
Apr 16, 2008

Yo ho?

drkeiscool posted:

Wait, aren't you Chaotic Good? Doesn't that preclude murdering your sibling?

Your question is based on lovely ancient alignment rules and is therefore dumb and bad. And even if it weren't, that's just Orzammar, baby :c00lbert:

Norsu
Mar 16, 2010
Don't kill him.

my dad
Oct 17, 2012

this shall be humorous
Let him be.

Phosphine
May 30, 2011

WHY, JUDY?! WHY?!
🤰🐰🆚🥪🦊
Regicide is the best cide

anilEhilated
Feb 17, 2014

But I say fuck the rain.

Grimey Drawer
Murder is clearly the most dwarfish response. Well, getting drunk and murder.

Medrex
Nov 17, 2012

Triangular. Nuclear. Loops.
Don't Kill

The guy's got a stick up his arse a meter long and he's not exactly an ideal king, but family is family and kinslaying 'aint what a cool dwarf lady is about.

EponymousMrYar
Jan 4, 2015

The enemy of my enemy is my enemy.
Going to put in a vote for No Murder.

Dwarf warriors are getting thinner by the year and there's no need to hasten that (if it's you or them though, :black101:)
Plus this is your other Brother suggesting it. In the thick political climate of Orzammar this is ringing major warning bells in my head. What's his angle? He seems nice. Too nice. Almost as if he wants you to pave the way for him. But he could be sincere! Best not to risk it after rocking the boat a bit with your support of the Air-touched.

Tiggum
Oct 24, 2007

Your life and your quest end here.


Phosphine posted:

Regicide is the best cide

I don't think killing the king is on the table.

David Corbett
Feb 6, 2008

Courage, my friends; 'tis not too late to build a better world.
Yeah, let's not kill him. I don't like the idea of whacking someone without some proof. Besides, what does Bhelen get out of this? His oldest brother is dead, and he has wicked leverage over his older sister.

Phosphine
May 30, 2011

WHY, JUDY?! WHY?!
🤰🐰🆚🥪🦊

Tiggum posted:

I don't think killing the king is on the table.

Eh, current king, future king. Same thing really.

Psion
Dec 13, 2002

eVeN I KnOw wHaT CoRnEr gAs iS

David Corbett posted:

Yeah, let's not kill him. I don't like the idea of whacking someone without some proof. Besides, what does Bhelen get out of this? His oldest brother is dead, and he has wicked leverage over his older sister.

someone's a quick study on DAO dwarven politics!

Torrannor
Apr 27, 2013

---FAGNER---
TEAM-MATE
Don't kill him. Let Bhelen do it if he wants it so much.

brycepahatesyou
Nov 3, 2011
Let him live. Be BETTER then him...

Lynneth
Sep 13, 2011
No killing, please.

thejoshie
May 3, 2013
Trian must die... if for no other than for him being an A-hole.

Bene Elim
Feb 9, 2010

The beast from Crete that can't be beat!
Let the bastard live. Better the A-hole you know, after all.

ComicsandSlushies
Feb 22, 2013
Let him live! When it comes to Dwarven Politics nothing is ever that simple.

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Livewire42
Oct 2, 2013
Who kills people?

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