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Pakled
Aug 6, 2011

WE ARE SMART
Last night, I had a dream that Achewood updated. Today, there were a bunch of new posts in this thread and the Achewood twitter had a post. This has to mean something.

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zetamind2000
Nov 6, 2007

I'm an alien.

Pakled posted:

This has to mean something.

It's time to buy craft soda?

Chickenwalker
Apr 21, 2011

by FactsAreUseless
February 6th he has a post about his "last day of work." Did he seriously lose his job at that advertising place already?

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

choobs posted:

If you had plans, they were made by an incorrect life you no longer maintain.

I am embarrassed I had forgotten about the gossipy hot dog chef archetype.

Leroy Dennui
Aug 9, 2014

Gina McCarthy made us gay,
but we would not have met
had Biden not dropped his cones
:gaysper::frogbon:

This reminds me of how poor-quality some of the art for the 2013-2014 strips was; I wonder if it's the matter of Onstad redrawing over existing vector assets with a raster editor for the sake of saving time or something.

A shameful Achewood strip all around.

Leroy Dennui fucked around with this message at 03:07 on Mar 15, 2015

MadJackal
Apr 30, 2004

Jerusalem posted:

Welp, better cancel my plans, time to reread the entire Great Outdoor Fight arc again.

This was me tonight. What an amazing run this was.

I'm now convinced that humanity as a whole has a peak creative period of about a decade, afterwhich we just stop being able to come up with new, entertaining material. The use of "sobriquet" alone in one of the GOF strips should have been a sign that Onstad would become a lifetime iconic author, but he's just completely burned out less than a decade ever.

Sweaty IT Nerd
Jul 13, 2007

*pouf*

Farmer Crack-Ass
Jan 2, 2001

this is me posting irl

erebus workin' some rough chuckles these days

prezbuluskey
Jul 23, 2007
A life, Jimmy, you know what that is? It's the shit that happens while you're waiting for moments that never come.
http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10232008

On the wikipedia page for what_happened they gonna show Cornelius leavin this club with that dancer right now. no disambiguation.

Android Blues
Nov 22, 2008

prezbuluskey posted:

http://achewood.com/index.php?date=10232008

On the wikipedia page for what_happened they gonna show Cornelius leavin this club with that dancer right now. no disambiguation.

YOU'RE GOOD, RIGHT? NOT BETRAYED?

El Gallinero Gros
Mar 17, 2010

Android Blues posted:

YOU'RE GOOD, RIGHT? NOT BETRAYED?

How good of you to call and "open up a can of dumbass"

Calaveron
Aug 7, 2006
:negative:
I am happy to have been alive while Achewood existed

WoodrowSkillson
Feb 24, 2005

*Gestures at 60 years of Lions history*

Calaveron posted:

I am happy to have been alive while Achewood existed

agreed, it was good

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

I have to admit, I was not aware of that fact about chickens.

panko
Sep 6, 2005

~honda best man~


Every day as I put on shoes I look at the framed & signed print of Ray Gets Sort of Stoned I have on my wall. Today it made me nostalgic for the masterpiece that was Achewood, but instead of getting all bloo-lidded and binging through the archives, I went and read all the strips that had been put up since I stopped reading it altogether, picking up around March 2012.

It didn't take me long to catch up.

I also dug up this post, all the way from July 2011:

MizuZero posted:

I remember being seventeen and on High School March Break, refreshing the gently caress out of the site during the daily updates of the Great Outdoor Fight's climax. I remember when the alt text for one strip was Onstad caps-yelling at people for ruining his bandwidth, and I was happy it was so popular. I remember wondering the site crash was due to an influx of new readers (!!who wouldn't -get- why the GOF was so cool, because they didn't know the characters at all!!), or solely because of the sore-wristed adulation of the established fans.

That arc demonstrated how good of a writer Onstad is when he's motivated. It was both funny and badass, while seemingly eschewing all of the tropes and cliches that works saddled by those adjectives use as crutches. It provided relevant characterization while establishing a continuity. Best of all, it was daily, with the occasional couple-day break taken between the storyline's big beats, the author possessing complete understanding of Joe Internet's ephemeral attention span.

It's sad to see such an exemplary webcomic go out like this; the store non-functioning, updates sporadic, and storylines discarded. It's worse than the final months of Perry Bible Fellowship, because not only was that strip gag-a-day, it provided a satisfying and appropriate conclusion.

Not to say that there's a dearth of funny comics on the Internet, but they all seem so limited in comparison to Achewood. Wacky skull-and-nerd related non-sequitur? Historical figures behaving in contemporary fashion? Flowcharts and cock jokes? Achewood did it, and then moved on a few weeks later.

It should just end. Like an aging, bigoted celebrity, every year it continues to exist tarnishes the brilliance it demonstrated earlier in its lifespan.

Here's to ten years of Achewood. *grabs dicksack*

:smith:

Leroy Dennui
Aug 9, 2014

Gina McCarthy made us gay,
but we would not have met
had Biden not dropped his cones
:gaysper::frogbon:
I had the privilege of getting the chance to read the GOF while it was being posted. I had only leaped on board in October of the previous year before the Fight storyline; I was 13 at the time.

Owlkill
Jul 1, 2009

Leroy Dennui posted:

I had the privilege of getting the chance to read the GOF while it was being posted. I had only leaped on board in October of the previous year before the Fight storyline; I was 13 at the time.

God, it blows my mind how long I've been reading achewood for when you put it like that. I remember reading it on a CRT monitor in my sixth-form college library when I must have been about 17.

High Lord Elbow
Jun 21, 2013

"You can sit next to Elvira."
To Onstadt's credit, all great comic strips tend to burn out after ten years or so. Bloom County, Far Side, Calvin and Hobbes... Their creators all realized that it was time to end it. (Ok, Berke Breathed tried to pull a couple of Onstadt's when he ran out of dough.)

It's the lovely comics that continue forever (Garfield, etc.).

Onstadt's biggest failure is that he neither ran this poo poo into the ground by churning out utter garbage like clockwork for years, nor ended it with a clean and definite break. And so people hold him up for contempt and mockery instead of celebrating a successful and brilliant run that left the party before it got drunk and puked down the front of the hostess's dress.

The End. No moral.

Calaveron
Aug 7, 2006
:negative:

High Lord Elbow posted:

To Onstadt's credit, all great comic strips tend to burn out after ten years or so. Bloom County, Far Side, Calvin and Hobbes... Their creators all realized that it was time to end it. (Ok, Berke Breathed tried to pull a couple of Onstadt's when he ran out of dough.)

It's the lovely comics that continue forever (Garfield, etc.).

Onstadt's biggest failure is that he neither ran this poo poo into the ground by churning out utter garbage like clockwork for years, nor ended it with a clean and definite break. And so people hold him up for contempt and mockery instead of celebrating a successful and brilliant run that left the party before it got drunk and puked down the front of the hostess's dress.

This would've been the perfect end of the strip, since one of the major themes of Achewood I feel is that while life might sometimes be a shitshow, it is still life and we must learn to enjoy it, and Téodor coming to terms with that makes perfect sense as a closing.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
Life ees cruel… But at least eet is life, at least for a while. That's where it should've ended. Everything that came afterwards just wasn't the same.

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

MMAgCh posted:

Life ees cruel… But at least eet is life, at least for a while. That's where it should've ended. Everything that came afterwards just wasn't the same.

On the one hand I agree, on the other that means we never would have gotten the illegal chinchilla farm, and can we really live in a world where that is the case?

H.P. Shivcraft
Mar 17, 2008

STAY UNRULY, YOU HEARTLESS MONSTERS!

Jerusalem posted:

On the one hand I agree, on the other that means we never would have gotten the illegal chinchilla farm, and can we really live in a world where that is the case?

The chinchilla farm and its proprietors was the exact moment I started to realize Achewood was losing me, so please, please let me have this beautiful world where it never happened.

prezbuluskey
Jul 23, 2007
A life, Jimmy, you know what that is? It's the shit that happens while you're waiting for moments that never come.

Calaveron posted:

This would've been the perfect end of the strip, since one of the major themes of Achewood I feel is that while life might sometimes be a shitshow, it is still life and we must learn to enjoy it, and Téodor coming to terms with that makes perfect sense as a closing.

Wouldve been good to end on, but instead we get the last strip of WEIRD IDEAS ABOUT WHAT IT MEANS TO BE A MAN.

High Lord Elbow
Jun 21, 2013

"You can sit next to Elvira."
Better that than ending on gay rape in the back of a van!

Boonys Cut Shot
Nov 5, 2004

Elite athlete

Jerusalem posted:

On the one hand I agree, on the other that means we never would have gotten the illegal chinchilla farm, and can we really live in a world where that is the case?
Yes because that was awful

bonvivant
Oct 1, 2014

I may be racist, transphobic, an antisemite and a misogynist, but I project like an angel ;)

MMAgCh posted:

Life ees cruel… But at least eet is life, at least for a while. That's where it should've ended. Everything that came afterwards just wasn't the same.

Yeah drat the marriage awfulness unto death one's a little too uncomfortably introspective which has been a problem with the strips for a few years now, same with Ray's abrupt and weird rehab arc.

When I first read Phillipe's going home arc I honestly suspected he'd just end it after that, and it would have been perfect for the universe. A very kind and small sendoff, very Chris Ware-like (which Onstad has named as an influence and has done a few homages to) with the surrealist element gently intact.

bonvivant
Oct 1, 2014

I may be racist, transphobic, an antisemite and a misogynist, but I project like an angel ;)
:(

Mr. Squishy
Mar 22, 2010

A country where you can always get richer.
Roast Beef took pills to turn into Molly.

Atmus
Mar 8, 2002
I feel cheated that none of the 2012 stuff happened.

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
How old do you think Ray/Beef/Teodor are in the strip?

prefect
Sep 11, 2001

No one, Woodhouse.
No one.




Dead Man’s Band

Johnny Aztec posted:

How old do you think Ray/Beef/Teodor are in the strip?

Ray and Beef were both children for at least part of the '80s.

Erebus
Jul 13, 2001

Okay... Keep your head, Steve boy...

They're probably all mid-30s or so. Beef's awkward teen years took place over the '90s, plus it is an established fact he wanted to kiss Molly Ringwald on the titties.

Pakled
Aug 6, 2011

WE ARE SMART
Ray and Beef's senior class in high school was the class of 1993 so if they were 17/18 then that'd make them 39/40 now.

Deathlove
Feb 20, 2003

Pillbug

Pakled posted:

Ray and Beef's senior class in high school was the class of 1993 so if they were 17/18 then that'd make them 39/40 now.

God, I've used Emotions Hair so often in the ensuing decade and it never fails to make me smile.

glug
Mar 12, 2004

JON JONES APOLOGIST #1

Pakled posted:

Ray and Beef's senior class in high school was the class of 1993 so if they were 17/18 then that'd make them 39/40 now.

Uh.. poo poo yes we um, we all turned 40 this year.

prefect
Sep 11, 2001

No one, Woodhouse.
No one.




Dead Man’s Band

Erebus posted:

They're probably all mid-30s or so. Beef's awkward teen years took place over the '90s, plus it is an established fact he wanted to kiss Molly Ringwald on the titties.

Dead Kennedys shirts were more of a late-'80s thing.

:corsair:

Erebus
Jul 13, 2001

Okay... Keep your head, Steve boy...

prefect posted:

Dead Kennedys shirts were more of a late-'80s thing.

:corsair:

Yeah, but the photo says it was taken in '93. I'm sure Beef is not one to quickly catch on to new trends.

Of course, this is the same '93 that he's supposed to be graduating and having Emotions Hair, so Onstad probably fiddled with the ages a bit in the six years between those strips because they're cartoon cats and no one cares.

Van Dis
Jun 19, 2004
I teach at a high school. Teens still wear Dead Kennedys shirts. Everything dies, except brands.

JoshTheStampede
Sep 8, 2004

come at me bro

Van Dis posted:

I teach at a high school. Teens still wear Dead Kennedys shirts. Everything dies, except brands.

When I was a kid I thought that logo was just some clothing brand, despite also being aware of and liking Dead Kennedys music.

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High Lord Elbow
Jun 21, 2013

"You can sit next to Elvira."
My great-grandfather wore a Dead Kennedys shirt when he lay with his future beloved Eunice for the first time after the Great War.

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