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Screaming Idiot posted:I have to love that Microsoft's answer to Siri is to use the softcore nerdbait chick from Halo, and then try to market her to the general public. But... there is no visual component to Cortana aside from a spinning circle? I've been using Windows Phones for 4 years now (although Cortana is about a year old) and if there is, I'm not aware of it. I mean it's a little weird to use a fictional military AI known for attaining self awareness and going insane, but Halo is Microsoft's biggest IP so what else would they use for a female 'AI' competitor to Siri? And it's not like you use Cortana and it casually drops references to Halo. The only time I have ever heard a reference to Halo is when I specifically asked about it. Its a digital assistant exactly like Siri that just happens to have a name and voice inspired by a character from a video game (that has earned millions and millions of dollars), how is this so dumb?
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Mar 31, 2015 23:22
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Screaming Idiot posted:I have to love that Microsoft's answer to Siri is to use the softcore nerdbait chick from Halo, and then try to market her to the general public. The origin is a bit embarrassing, but it's not like that's what shows up in Windows. It's, like some concentric rings. I've never played Halo, so I didn't catch the Spartan connection. I assumed it was because they've ripped out the legacy code. Edit: beaten
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Mar 31, 2015 23:24
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probably posted but https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b38kUOOJUN0
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Mar 31, 2015 23:30
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Just go under options and unlock sexy mode, and she'll appear as a pair of big blue titties that get squished onto your screen when you ask questions. No seriously, Cortana is a fun character with some pretty funny and wry lines. A little personality isn't a bad thing.
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Mar 31, 2015 23:34
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also this poo poo which was above a lot of urinals at my university 
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Mar 31, 2015 23:36
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The Blue Pyramid posted:But... there is no visual component to Cortana aside from a spinning circle? I've been using Windows Phones for 4 years now (although Cortana is about a year old) and if there is, I'm not aware of it. I mean it's a little weird to use a fictional military AI known for attaining self awareness and going insane, but Halo is Microsoft's biggest IP so what else would they use for a female 'AI' competitor to Siri? The spinning circle is exactly why it's dumb. Instead of coming up with a new personality, they've basically made a character with a lot of embarrassing baggage. I like to imagine some middle-aged suburban mom getting interested in her kids' phones, then searching "Cortana" in Google and seeing the origin of the name -- and maybe porn inspired by said origin depending on her search settings -- and immediately posting a sixteen-trillion word diatribe on Facebook about her precious children being tainted by Microsoft's sinful electro-harlot. mind the walrus posted:There are entire R&D departments whose unspoken mission is to get us to that level of waifu technology. There are some Japanese companies that make it more explicit, but rest assured everywhere there are tons of undersexed STEM dudes there is an undercurrent of working towards that day when every man gets some form of robot/AI sex slave. More proof we need to murder all gamers.
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Mar 31, 2015 23:53
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Screaming Idiot posted:The spinning circle is exactly why it's dumb. Instead of coming up with a new personality, they've basically made a character with a lot of embarrassing baggage. Seriously what is it with this thread and all these really weird and creepy hypothetical situations??
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Mar 31, 2015 23:56
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kazil posted:Seriously what is it with this thread and all these really weird and creepy hypothetical situations?? Searching Cortana is basically that one part near the end of Fifth Element where that babe sees Hitler.
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Apr 1, 2015 00:02
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Decrepus posted:Searching Cortana is basically that one part near the end of Fifth Element where that babe sees Hitler. What babe?
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Apr 1, 2015 00:05
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The babe with the power.
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Apr 1, 2015 00:14
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What Power?
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Apr 1, 2015 00:17
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Also regarding the newest IE being called Spartan, while the obvious connection is to Halo, Microsoft seems to have a thing for giving things codename Sparta or Spartan, going back to Windows 3.1. Hell, the failed Age of Empires Online was called Project Spartan during its beta phase. And on that topic, Age of Empires Online is a good example of a dumb move in marketing. It was a 'free to play' MMO RTS, which had the usual gameplay of an Age of Empires game along with customizable capital cities, an in game economy, rudimentary crafting, collecting of gear, etc. The game shipped with 3 civilizations, with another 3 added during the course of the game's support. Where it gets kind of dumb is that the 3 civs that the game shipped with were almost entirely free- you could play their entire campaigns and reach max level without spending a single cent, albeit you're locked out of the very best in gear. If you wanted access to a 'premium' civ you paid $10 (or wait for the once a month sales on steam); you could also spend money on vanity gear that did nothing but change your units' appearance and vanity buildings for your capital. Where it gets dumber is that there was no incentive whatsoever to pay for anything- once a civ reached max level, a minimal amount of grinding started earning a player 'empire points' which could be use to purchase the same exact things that you could also buy with real money. Once Microsoft Game Studios realized they weren't making any money, they handed the whole thing off to a separate studio, who began rapidly working on a 7th civilization as well as general overhauls of gameplay and minor fixes. Now here's where it gets dumbest. Players were really, really excited about the 7th civilization. Fans who realized that the game was dying due to lack of income were already lining up, ready to pay (even though they could have had it for free). A week or so before the civ was to be launched... Microsoft pulled the plug on the whole project. All production, patching and development was immediately halted, the nearly complete civ was entirely scrapped, and the game was put in 'support mode' (ie 'We'll keep the servers up, that's all') for a few more months. After which the game (which, keep in mind, was entirely online) disappeared forever. It's a drat shame because it was fun as hell. But lesson for any would-be game developers out there- when you make a game with high production values, you should probably make sure that it will bring in at least *some* income. And if your game has slim to negative profit margins, you might want to consider advertising it at some point. I don't think I ever saw the game advertised anywhere, in any form. Screaming Idiot posted:I like to imagine some middle-aged suburban mom getting interested in her kids' phones, then searching "Cortana" in Google and seeing the origin of the name -- and maybe porn inspired by said origin depending on her search settings -- and immediately posting a sixteen-trillion word diatribe on Facebook about her precious children being tainted by Microsoft's sinful electro-harlot. Isn't this true of drat near anything in existence though, from Mario to Boeing to fruits and vegetables? Hell, if you have the right search settings I'm sure a google search for Siri will bring up porn
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Apr 1, 2015 00:17
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Screaming Idiot posted:The spinning circle is exactly why it's dumb. Instead of coming up with a new personality, they've basically made a character with a lot of embarrassing baggage. You could have spent your time actually writing creative fiction instead of making up this hyperbolic, ridiculous anecdote just to prove how """""""""""creepy""""""""""""" some nerd thing is you massive nerd.
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Apr 1, 2015 01:23
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The Blue Pyramid posted:Isn't this true of drat near anything in existence though, from Mario to Boeing to fruits and vegetables? Hell, if you have the right search settings I'm sure a google search for Siri will bring up porn https://twitter.com/siripornstar
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Apr 1, 2015 02:00
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death .cab for qt posted:This sounds like the start to an Event Horizon sequel "Captain, you're gonna want to hear this" *presses 'play' on recording* "WooooooOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooOOOOooo" "We're leaving"
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Apr 1, 2015 02:02
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Screaming Idiot posted:The spinning circle is exactly why it's dumb. Instead of coming up with a new personality, they've basically made a character with a lot of embarrassing baggage. I think crazy moms complaining about "sinful electro-harlots" on facebook would actually increase the Windows Phone's popularity.
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Apr 1, 2015 04:57
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But what if someone eventually googled windows phone milfs? It could lead to a dumb move in marketing.
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Apr 1, 2015 06:14
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I've learned of so many terrible fetishes over the years, I would think I'd be thankful that the kinkiest thing my kid is into is a naked blue lady. For instance, what if he was looking... at this?!?! (  for eroticised venison)
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Apr 1, 2015 07:01
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GOTTA STAY FAI posted:"Captain, you're gonna want to hear this" *presses 'play' on recording* This line also works for the third movie, which includes a doctor who crossover
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Apr 1, 2015 09:13
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Len posted:We have a local shop around here and every time I've been in the employees are assholes. I think it's part of the charm? They are in the art district of a shithole Ohio city so maybe it's their gimmick. There was a little chain in SE Wisconsin about a decade ago called Ed DeBevic's where servers being rude was their gimmick. They even advertised it that way. They are now out of business. I wonder why.
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Apr 2, 2015 01:27
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Ed DeBevic's is a very popular tourist destination in Chicago. All footage I've seen from it makes me think more obnoxious than rude, which is not a reason to go imho. Funny enough, my dad likes going to "Dick's Last Resort", another "rude-ness themed" restaurant, which wikipedia describes as "obnoxious" rather than rude, but that my dad describes as like going to a dive bar where you are clearly not welcome, and they go out of your way not only to be rude, but outright humiliating. He's told stories of people just walking in off the street, maybe to get directions or whatever, and clearly looking like they had no idea what kind of place it was and being deeply offended. Still doesn't sound like a place I'd enjoy though.
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Apr 2, 2015 01:49
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Choco1980 posted:Ed DeBevic's is a very popular tourist destination in Chicago. All footage I've seen from it makes me think more obnoxious than rude, which is not a reason to go imho. Funny enough, my dad likes going to "Dick's Last Resort", another "rude-ness themed" restaurant, which wikipedia describes as "obnoxious" rather than rude, but that my dad describes as like going to a dive bar where you are clearly not welcome, and they go out of your way not only to be rude, but outright humiliating. He's told stories of people just walking in off the street, maybe to get directions or whatever, and clearly looking like they had no idea what kind of place it was and being deeply offended. Still doesn't sound like a place I'd enjoy though. We ate there in Indianapolis it was pretty solid food but my server wasn't anywhere near as assholeish as I expected him to be. He brought me my margarita and less than two minutes later it was gone. No comments from him about it.
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Apr 2, 2015 01:52
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Retail Slave posted:There was a little chain in SE Wisconsin about a decade ago called Ed DeBevic's where servers being rude was their gimmick. They even advertised it that way. Ed Debevic's is amusing as a tourist spot and as somebody already mentioned is very popular in Chicago. I had no idea it was a chain. Unfortunately the food is Steak 'n' Shake quality for double the price.
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Apr 2, 2015 01:59
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Retail Slave posted:There was a little chain in SE Wisconsin about a decade ago called Ed DeBevic's where servers being rude was their gimmick. They even advertised it that way. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXZzf_-clt8
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Apr 2, 2015 02:01
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Screaming Idiot posted:The spinning circle is exactly why it's dumb. Instead of coming up with a new personality, they've basically made a character with a lot of embarrassing baggage. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=um4NkUFH0pg mildly NSFW for Hooters Girls
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Apr 2, 2015 02:18
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So remember how Pizza Hut unveiled a bunch of new flavors like Sriracha* and such and encouraged you to try it you adventurous flavor tryer millennial you? Yeah sales went down 3.5% over the quarter and management is backpedaling real hard with choice quotes like "customers will love it, they just haven't tried it yet" while attempting to assuage a deluge of franchisee complaints. *gently caress the marketer concept of a sriracha
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Apr 2, 2015 06:02
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Probably doesn't help that around here they're perhaps the shittiest pizza (baring a hot and ready) and at some of the highest prices. I don't know about the US, but here in canada, for about $20 you can get two 12" pretty basic pizzas, meanwhile at pizza hut you buck up even more for one. As others have stated, you want a 'millennial's' dollar, make it decent, reasonably price, and don't pander.
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Apr 2, 2015 06:35
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Pizza Hut's new menu is actually nice but there are so many choices that ordering online is the only feasible way to figure out what you want.
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Apr 2, 2015 07:57
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SomeJazzyRat posted:Probably doesn't help that around here they're perhaps the shittiest pizza (baring a hot and ready) and at some of the highest prices. I don't know about the US, but here in canada, for about $20 you can get two 12" pretty basic pizzas, meanwhile at pizza hut you buck up even more for one. Marketers assume that millenials are just as wealthy as their parents (they aren't) and can afford to throw around fat stacks of cash for stupid bullshit at a moment's notice (they can't; hellooooo student debt!). They also figure that the way to get somebody's money is to ignore what they're selling and focus on the sell and use whatever is trendy with those kids this week. The marketer speak comes in because no company in America is allowed to admit fault ever for any reason. Pizza Hut in some areas makes decent pizzas but yeah they're generally more expensive than everything else and don't seem to give a poo poo about keeping prices affordable while whining that bad sales are never their own fault. It depends on the Pizza Hut, I've noticed; some are good but others are thoroughly "meh." They also have a habit of charging for delivery but not telling you while other places do not. I think one of the few reasons that Pizza Hut actually stays in business is because they're often the only pizza place near by that you can actually go in and sit down at.
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Apr 2, 2015 08:07
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Barudak posted:So remember how Pizza Hut unveiled a bunch of new flavors like Sriracha* and such and encouraged you to try it you adventurous flavor tryer millennial you? Yeah sales went down 3.5% over the quarter and management is backpedaling real hard with choice quotes like "customers will love it, they just haven't tried it yet" while attempting to assuage a deluge of franchisee complaints. Pizza Hut hired some youtube celebs to "design" some signature pizzas. The entire thing was the brainchild of a marketing exec who probably went "Well, the internet is a big deal, how can we use that to make more money?"
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Apr 2, 2015 08:36
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Sigh, you need to post this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qA5pIpdQEr0 Barudak posted:So remember how Pizza Hut unveiled a bunch of new flavors like Sriracha* and such and encouraged you to try it you adventurous flavor tryer millennial you? Yeah sales went down 3.5% over the quarter and management is backpedaling real hard with choice quotes like "customers will love it, they just haven't tried it yet" while attempting to assuage a deluge of franchisee complaints. See, I appreciate them making new flavors and whatnot but "Dump some balsamic sauce on your fast food pizza  " just doesn't sound appetizing. For exampleBacon Cheeseburger Pizza quote:
quote:Honey Sriracha sauce[base] topped with grilled chicken, sliced jalapeño peppers, sweet pineapple and Peruvian cherry peppers—flavored up with honey Sriracha on the crust edge and a honey Sriracha sauce drizzle. quote:Creamy garlic Parmesan sauce topped with hardwood smoked bacon, fresh mushrooms and fresh spinach—flavored up with a salted pretzel crust edge and balsamic sauce drizzle. Like, the idea sounds pretty good, but I've never had fastfood-chain level pizza with a good sauce not white or red. UGHHHH, memories of Domino's Cheeseburger pizza with ketchup sauce
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Apr 2, 2015 09:09
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ToxicSlurpee posted:Marketers assume that millenials are just as wealthy as their parents (they aren't) and can afford to throw around fat stacks of cash for stupid bullshit at a moment's notice (they can't; hellooooo student debt!). They also figure that the way to get somebody's money is to ignore what they're selling and focus on the sell and use whatever is trendy with those kids this week. How else are marketers supposed to keep themselves in a job? If they can't market themselves as being the most important thing to a product/business/industry's success, they aren't any good in the first place.
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Apr 2, 2015 10:26
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Pizza Hut sucks and its needlessly expensive but if you have the right coupons you can make a real nice white sauce pizza with a pretzel crust. The sauces all sound atrocious though. If only the US had the same concept of putting garlic sauce on top of pizza as they do in Poland 
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Apr 2, 2015 10:34
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Around here Pizza Hut is way cheaper than everything else. It's like 9 bucks for a 3 topping large, but if you order in store its 10 for any number of toppings because they don't give a gently caress.
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Apr 2, 2015 11:40
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The Blue Pyramid posted:Pizza Hut sucks and its needlessly expensive but if you have the right coupons you can make a real nice white sauce pizza with a pretzel crust. The sauces all sound atrocious though. If only the US had the same concept of putting garlic sauce on top of pizza as they do in Poland Yeah the pretzel crust is the only thing worth a drat that they changed. I like sriracha and all the other stuff they added, but the pretzel bacon and spinach one is the only pizza hut pizza that is even edible, excepting the old pepperoni lovers staple. And even then neither of them is very good.
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Apr 2, 2015 14:04
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Postal Parcel posted:UGHHHH, memories of Domino's Cheeseburger pizza with ketchup sauce I ordered one of those once. Even took a bite of it before taking it straight to the dumpster. The sauce tastes like thousand island dressing mixed with HFCS-heavy ketchup, mayo, and cheap mustard.
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Apr 2, 2015 14:23
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Postal Parcel posted:Like, the idea sounds pretty good, but I've never had fastfood-chain level pizza with a good sauce not white or red. What, in the context of pizza, is white sauce?
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Apr 2, 2015 15:28
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Somewhere between garlic butter and alfredo sauce.
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Apr 2, 2015 15:44
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That's a good description. You usually see it on pizzas topped with chicken, but it goes well with lots of other things, too. Re: Pizza Hut's new menu I'm friends with a couple people that work at our local Hut, and they say the vast majority of customers are still ordering their usual pies, and almost nobody wants the weird sauce stuff they drizzle on.
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Apr 2, 2015 15:49
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White sauce is also a good option to have because some people are allergic to tomato.
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Apr 2, 2015 16:06
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