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Apr 18, 2015 21:54
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| # ? May 31, 2024 23:31 |
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They missed out by not using the "boner" C3PO image.
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Apr 18, 2015 22:00
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Chewie doesn't age
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Apr 19, 2015 00:19
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shiksa posted:rest in piss eu Good
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Apr 19, 2015 00:58
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Special Message From Senor Lowtax Thank you, but this thread has already been reported recently! Click here to return to the forums.
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Apr 19, 2015 01:02
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I kinda wish DICE had tried improving on space combat instead of removing it from the game entirely because there were some good ideas in Battlefront 2's space mode even if it did mostly just turn out boring, but I guess getting combined air/ground battles back is worth it. I can't wait to zoom around in a TIE Interceptor in sick next-gen graphics 
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Apr 19, 2015 01:14
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Ivor Biggun posted:Chewie doesn't age because logically wookies age exactly how people do
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Apr 19, 2015 03:03
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They've announced details about the first spin off movie and its an entry into the crowded "who stole the Death Star plans" genre. I guess with them getting rid of the rest of the continuity this is the one true version of events.
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Apr 20, 2015 15:08
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Ivor Biggun posted:Chewie doesn't age Turns out wookies age like dogs so Han is on his like fourth Chewie.
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Apr 20, 2015 15:17
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Aww, they're all buried in the millennium falcon's back yard.
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Apr 20, 2015 15:19
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muscles like this? posted:They've announced details about the first spin off movie and its an entry into the crowded "who stole the Death Star plans" genre. I guess with them getting rid of the rest of the continuity this is the one true version of events. RIP Kyle Katarn
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Apr 20, 2015 15:31
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SaltLick posted:RIP Kyle Katarn Again, for every good version there are like 20 different Author Self-Inserts that did it as well.
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Apr 20, 2015 16:43
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RIP, 10 thousand Mary Sues
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Apr 20, 2015 16:51
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ElGroucho posted:RIP, 10 thousand Mary Sues It's as if a million Mary Sues cried out in terror, and were suddenly silenced.
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Apr 20, 2015 16:54
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I recently picked up a copy of the Courtship of Princess Leia for cheaps. I read it some 15 years ago but I remember nothing from it. Some highlights -Han Solo has to spend hours wrestling a real big worm out of the ground on the planet of the Amazons. I thought this was some kinda penis metaphor, but I don't think the author is intelligent enough for that upon reflection. -Princess Leia agrees to Han's kidnapping but takes it out on him by being a petty bitch and complaining about the way he cooks. -Turns out Han Solo is a king, or something (!) ((???)) -C-3PO makes a song about Han Solo being a king and sings it to woo Princess Leia -Luke apparently can't do the Jedi mind trick. -Not really a single highlight, but the whole basically revolves around Han Solo being super creepy and a dick. Leia is also really unappealing and unlikable, and Luke, well he's doing that whole "oh the weight of Jedi falls upon me!'' mope show. There's some new characters that aren't terrible-I honestly think that Isolder, Han's rival for Leia's affections, could work in another setting. Same for the wild woman, who's your straight from central casting noble savage character, but hey, Ygritte works, so it's not a completely useless stereotype. There's a whole planet ruled by Force witches (who ride around rancors, that part isn't actually so bad) and there's a whole section of the universe ruled by women and it's just all so heavy handed. I think it could have interesting to very subtly sort of try to explore gender roles in Star Wars, but that obviously is way to sophisticated for the EU. There's good witches and bad witches and Imperials and blah blah blah it's your boilerplate 90s EU book. Half-baked idea, terrible execution. Easily the stupidest loving book I've ever read in my entire life, but the worst? Can't say that, at least to took my mind off exams for a few minutes.
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Apr 20, 2015 16:56
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Speaking of, does anyone have a link to the old bookbarn lets read those lovely star wars books? I remember some hilariously bad poo poo in the books, but dont want to pain of actually reading them myself.
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Apr 20, 2015 18:05
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Courtship was pretty bad, yeah; the weird opening scene where Han is gambling for planets was extremely badly written, as I recall, as if the author had never played a card game in their life. Especially not for money.
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Apr 20, 2015 18:12
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silvergoose posted:Courtship was pretty bad, yeah; the weird opening scene where Han is gambling for planets was extremely badly written, as I recall, as if the author had never played a card game in their life. Especially not for money. Sabacc, or Star Wars poker, is in a lot of the books. I think in the Jedi Academy series Han loses the Millennium Falcon to Lando in a game of sabacc and it also doesn't make much sense. Then Lando loses on purpose to impress Mara Jade Apparently the cards change value at random, which is super fun for the HP Lovecraft themed game we play when drunk and fun, but not great for wagering ships and planets. Also, in Courtship, Han wins the planet from a character who is basically the Robot Monster.  I'd think this was a pretty funny reference but I doubt it was done on purpose. People where talking earlier about the lower levels of Coursecant, which is think where the poker game in question here takes place. Also, in the Jedi Academy series, I think Wedge is in command of some destruction crew (because that's what you do with your best pilot, I guess) and they come across some Force sensing apparatus down there. The lower levels of Coursecant are the type of ideas that are endemic to the EU, I think; pretty interesting idea that is always executed poorly.
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Apr 20, 2015 18:23
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Oh I know how Sabacc works, and I know how it's used in the books, I'm just saying the gambling scene in Courtship itself was *bad*. Like, it's not how low stakes gamblers work, and it's not high stakes gamblers work, either, it just sounded like "I am sweating bullets because it is FOR ALL OF THE MONEY"
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Apr 20, 2015 18:27
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Also, the fact that Han 'won' a planet sort of bothers me. It seems to go against everything the New Republic would stand for as it's basically colonialism.
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Apr 20, 2015 18:39
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kith_groupie posted:Also, the fact that Han 'won' a planet sort of bothers me. It seems to go against everything the New Republic would stand for as it's basically colonialism. I mean, a deed to a planet makes no sense whatsoever, in that the parallel to our world is a deed to a country.
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Apr 20, 2015 18:42
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DT6zWPjyOmY I don't loving get being that excited about anything ever. Maybe because I'm a grown up? Like, the Voltron team could land in my backyard and ask me to be the team leader and also the Baroness from G.I. Joe wants to bang, and Hobbes the tiger has come to life and is my best friend, and I would probably have a less enthusiastic reaction. Am I truly dead inside if I don't well up with tears when I see an elderly Han Solo next to a muppet?
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Apr 20, 2015 18:44
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kith_groupie posted:Also, the fact that Han 'won' a planet sort of bothers me. It seems to go against everything the New Republic would stand for as it's basically colonialism. Everything related to planets in Star Wars makes no goddamn sense.
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Apr 20, 2015 18:45
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Wedemeyer posted:Speaking of, does anyone have a link to the old bookbarn lets read those lovely star wars books? I remember some hilariously bad poo poo in the books, but dont want to pain of actually reading them myself. Here you go. Need archive access, of course: http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3296954
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Apr 20, 2015 18:47
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silvergoose posted:I mean, a deed to a planet makes no sense whatsoever, in that the parallel to our world is a deed to a country. Well the Hapanese territory was only 63 planets which was tiny and resulted in inbreeding. Maybe blowing up Alderann was the equivalent of destroying a town?
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Apr 20, 2015 18:47
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Mr.Pibbleton posted:Well the Hapanese territory was only 63 planets which was tiny and resulted in inbreeding. Maybe blowing up Alderann was the equivalent of destroying a town? There were billions of people on Alderaan. And spell it right please. How many billions of people were supposedly on Coruscant again, with them having to literally import food for the entire planet?
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Apr 20, 2015 18:52
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ElGroucho posted:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DT6zWPjyOmY These people aren't that excited either, they are overacting for views. I dunno how you could get that excited for a new Star Wars movie in a universe where the prequels happened. If this was 1999 then yeah. Eventually you learn that getting really excited for new movies \ video games \ whatever is super dumb as it invariably leads to disappointment.
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Apr 20, 2015 19:05
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The whole point of winning the planet was that the guy basically sold han a bridge. Its poor writing because han really isnt a sucker. Its probably poor writing for a lot of other reasons too.
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Apr 20, 2015 19:06
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I started thinking about the EU books I read in adolescence and I recall that The Crystal Star was also pretty terrible, but didn't really bug me as much as Courtship did, probably because I liked Princess Leia so much and really identified with her and she was much more likable in The Crystal Star. In that book, she takes on the persona of a bounty hunter to track down her kidnapped kids. Still dumb as poo poo, but much less offensive on a personal level. I remember The Crystal Star pretty clearly because I had it under my counter at work and would read it when things where slow. There's a werewolf race in it. There's a race of multiarmed super humans who use sonar to communicate. There's an artificial planetoid. There's these little bug hair dye things that walk across Leia's and Chewie's hair to disguise them on the hunt for the kids. There's basically neo-Nazis who call themselves The Empire Reborn who are planning to sacrifice Force sensitive children, among whom there is a some sort of centaur that is bffs with Jania Solo (Jacean is bffs with a dragon that for some reason is on the planetoid). There's Han Solos ex-girlfriend. There's a race of ghost people. Luke has a beard I think. A lot of stuff happens. But stands out in my mind the most, after all these years, is Waru (very similar to Xenu-that cannot be a concidence). http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Waru I actually liked Waru as an idea. It's some sort of inter-dimensional Force vampire that is made of quivering gold jelly. It fucks with Lukes head. It had a cult around it. It was much more interesting to me than the flavor the week washed up Imperial. But apparently it's the most hated thing ever in the EU. Am I crazy? Is Waru really that awful?
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Apr 20, 2015 19:16
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Gammatron 64 posted:These people aren't that excited either, they are overacting for views. this is so god drat cringe worthy. we need a modern hitler to gas the autists
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Apr 20, 2015 19:19
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Fetus Tree posted:The whole point of winning the planet was that the guy basically sold han a bridge. But everyone acted like it was a legit thing, so the reader has to presume that it is a real thing. No one ever said "oh Han, you got had!" It was such a backwater planet though that everyone treated it like he had a couple of acres of land in the Yukon or something. The whole premise was just bizarre. How can one man own a planet?
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Apr 20, 2015 19:19
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My reaction to the new Star Wars trailers are "yep, that sure looks like another Star Wars movie. hopefully it will be good. if not, eh, it's not like a bad star wars thing is new"
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Apr 20, 2015 19:28
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"Waru was a largely mysterious being to all who encountered him, particularly due to the unknowns surrounding his home and his species. His actions and motives were often hard to understand because of his mysterious nature.[6] Most, if not all, of these actions were centered around a desire to return to his own dimension.[1][3] While outside his own universe, Waru was in a constant state of loneliness, which reverberated through his actions. When presented with such an opportunity to return home by former Procurator of Justice and Dark Jedi Hethrir, Waru was incredibly willing to comply, even with the knowledge of Hethrir's motives.[1]" Waru enjoys: healing other people, sacrificing his own life force for others, telling people he wants to go home because he's lonely and crushing children then admonishing their parents. I think the only thing objectionable about this character is them being from another dimension with the anti-force properties which isn't explained at all.
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Apr 20, 2015 19:28
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i havent read a single post in this thread but i cringe whenever i think about luke skywalker sucking chewbaccas dick for extra force power what were they thinking?
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Apr 20, 2015 19:29
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Gammatron 64 posted:My reaction to the new Star Wars trailers are "yep, that sure looks like another Star Wars movie. hopefully it will be good. if not, eh, it's not like a bad star wars thing is new" "If it's bad, I hope it's really really bad, so we can at least get some yucks out of it."
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Apr 20, 2015 20:05
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Ghost Head posted:i havent read a single post in this thread but i cringe whenever i think about luke skywalker sucking chewbaccas dick for extra force power what were they thinking? Midichlorians by marriage
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Apr 20, 2015 20:09
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has anyone said 'all of it' yet
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Apr 20, 2015 20:24
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I'm just wondering... Is it going to be like poetry? Is it going to rhyme?
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Apr 20, 2015 20:26
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If you really like star wars youll probably enjoy a lot of the eu tho. Thats a fact. Doesnt mean its good, but its still probably true.
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Apr 20, 2015 20:30
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good news everyone, disney said none of the eu happened, so you don't have to be traumatized anymore. the thing this thread is about isn't real. it's like a bad dream. but you're awake now.
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Apr 20, 2015 20:54
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