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Prilm Bek: Mob Crease
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Apr 22, 2015 02:01
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 This really happened. CJacobs posted:I am really pushing #Blartcore games for Q2 2015. Paul Blart but it's a messy physics simulator where you tumble Kevin James head over heels toward piles of delicious donuts forever. There is no mall copping to be done. #PaulerBlartydeux
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Apr 22, 2015 02:01
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Pilb Bird: Meat Camp
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Apr 22, 2015 02:02
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Remember at the end of Tobias Wolfe's "Bullet in the Brain" when he just keeps repeating "They is" over and over? I want the last thing I think when I get shot in the head to be "Paul Blart: Mall Cop" again and again and again.
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Apr 22, 2015 02:03
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I think a Paul Blart game that's basically a mix of Bully, LA Noire, and Dead Rising would own hard
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Apr 22, 2015 02:05
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FactsAreUseless posted:Remember at the end of Tobias Wolfe's "Bullet in the Brain" when he just keeps repeating "They is" over and over? I want the last thing I think when I get shot in the head to be "Paul Blart: Mall Cop" again and again and again. What system was that on?
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Apr 22, 2015 02:05
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Adam Bowen posted:I think a Paul Blart game that's basically a mix of Bully, LA Noire, and Dead Rising would own hard The final mission involves him blasting his way through the border patrol as he rides his Segway down to Mexico to track down his estranged wife who married him for a green card and left him with a daughter.
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Apr 22, 2015 02:07
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Adam Bowen posted:What system was that on?
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Apr 22, 2015 02:07
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Paul Blart: Jaguar
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Apr 22, 2015 02:07
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Paul Blart and King of Queens have to team up to find George Costanza's dad after he uses his free water cup at the food court to get a Cherry Coke
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Apr 22, 2015 02:09
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Apr 22, 2015 02:10
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Almost as scary as Walter Matthau.
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Apr 22, 2015 02:45
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FactsAreUseless posted:Remember at the end of Tobias Wolfe's "Bullet in the Brain" when he just keeps repeating "They is" over and over? I want the last thing I think when I get shot in the head to be "Paul Blart: Mall Cop" again and again and again. That is not a short story I expected to hear offhanded references to on here. 
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Apr 22, 2015 02:50
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That's his style, make some bad posts to sound dumb and then drop some literary references to sound smart
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Apr 22, 2015 02:53
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one would think mispelling paul blart's name in reference to mall cop wouldn't be funny anymore, but it really is the meme that keeps on giving
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Apr 22, 2015 04:38
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Sleeveless posted:If this was a few console generations ago we'd be getting an actual full-blown Paul Blart game, now they're probably just making an endless runner where you play as Paul Blart on his Segway. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DKHPxpNZ8_s Pepsiman is also your surprise anime
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Apr 22, 2015 04:41
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bloodychill posted:Almost as scary as Walter Matthau. 
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Apr 22, 2015 04:45
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Howard Phillips posted:Why the regret? Sounds like you got some wisdom to bestow. Basically, no matter how good or how inebriated you are, you will reach at best 1 out of 3 games being enjoyable. And since your average game is an hourish long, that means you get one hour of a good time, for two hours of grueling poo poo. No game is ever won out of skill, not even pro games. It's all about making your opponent rage as autistically as possible. Or in pro games where the teams can actually hold their composure, it's about busting out strategies the other hasn't played against before, because adaptation is not a skill that's needed for Dota2. The problem is that most people think the game is skill and/or knowledge based. So then you get idiots who read on reddit that you should build a hero this way, and never deviate from it. And then they rage at anyone for doing not that, even if it's a completely different circumstance than the build is for. Dota 2 is a race against time trying to keep your teams morale up longer than the enemy team.
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Apr 22, 2015 04:58
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DOTA 2 is real bad, but to be fair it's literally a copy of a 12 year old mod in a genre that has actually improved a bit over the last 12 years.
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Apr 22, 2015 05:34
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I'm starting to think all those years spent not playing games with anime babes were wasted.
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Apr 22, 2015 08:59
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Is there still a IRC room people from games congregate in? It used to be #idlegames but apparently that's dead now.
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Apr 22, 2015 09:23
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Adam Bowen posted:That's his style, make some bad posts to sound dumb and then drop some literary references to sound smart
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Apr 22, 2015 11:32
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Flowers for FactsAreUseless: Perl Bort: Morb Cerp Edition
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Apr 22, 2015 16:56
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FactsAreUseless posted:I call it "The Algernon Protocol." 
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Apr 22, 2015 17:07
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Adam Bowen posted:That's his style, make some bad posts to sound dumb and then drop some literary references to sound smart hm. This doesn't sound like it would work, but as the titular character says in J. B Cabell's Jurgen: A Comedy of Justice, "I'll try any drink once!"
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Apr 22, 2015 17:23
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Please do not post a picture of me, the vaguely ethnic man in the background.
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Apr 22, 2015 18:15
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Bicyclops posted:hm. This doesn't sound like it would work, but as the titular character says in J. B Cabell's Jurgen: A Comedy of Justice, "I'll try any drink once!"
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Apr 22, 2015 18:16
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Killing Floor 2 is insanely grindy btw and there are going to be account wipes between now and release, so don't buy yet.
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Apr 22, 2015 18:19
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Adam Bowen posted:I'm gonna buy Killing Floor 2, ignoring my rule against Early Access. Adam Bowen posted:Killing Floor 2 is insanely grindy btw and there are going to be account wipes between now and release, so don't buy yet.
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Apr 22, 2015 18:21
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FactsAreUseless posted:Here's the difference: Everyone has read Bullet in the Brain. Everyone. It's like Hills Like White Elephants. If you were ever taught English, you had to read it. That makes mine better, though, because if I'm referencing something someone has to look up to even know what it is, clearly I am a clever and well-read, intimidating man, ready to laugh as I glance down my glasses at the ignorance of the masses. Like Tito Melema, I can construct a scholarly identity for myself and nobody will be the wiser. 
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Apr 22, 2015 18:27
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Good guy goon buys games so you don't have to
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Apr 22, 2015 18:28
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Bicyclops posted:That makes mine better, though, because if I'm referencing something someone has to look up to even know what it is, clearly I am a clever and well-read, intimidating man, ready to laugh as I glance down my glasses at the ignorance of the masses. Like Tito Melema, I can construct a scholarly identity for myself and nobody will be the wiser.
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Apr 22, 2015 18:32
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Adam Bowen posted:Good guy goon buys games so you don't have to
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Apr 22, 2015 18:32
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Apr 22, 2015 18:32
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I wonder if I could RPG maker to just make a visual representation of a George Eliot novel
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Apr 22, 2015 18:33
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where's my new Panzer Dragoon on-rails shooter
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Apr 22, 2015 18:42
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FactsAreUseless posted:Please do not post a picture of me, the vaguely ethnic man in the background. you're Mac irl?
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Apr 22, 2015 18:55
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Playing witcher 2 on 360. Game breaking bug in the first 5 minutes where i opened a gate before all the enemies were dead and the game didnt count it but deactivated the switch permanently. How big of a problem are bugs? Also how do i equip mutagens?
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Apr 22, 2015 19:33
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i finished the order it was really fun and well worth the play. i traded it in and i finally got advanced warfare again so the universe is realigned.
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Apr 22, 2015 20:02
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i'm rewatching e3 2014 as prep for writing e3 2015 OP. i know its easy to look back on e3s and say "how did people get so excited" but this was microsoft's lineup last year call of duty forza 5/horizon 2 evolve (lol) rear end creed unity (lol) dragon age inquisition (lol) sunset overdrive dead rising 3 DLC dance central spotlight fable legends (lol) project spark (lol) indies: ori & blind forest, inside, id@xbox sizzle reel master chief collection (lol) halo tv show (lol) rise of the tomb raider witcher 3 phantom dust (dead??) tom clancy the division scalebound (vaporware??) crackdown (vaporware??) i looked it up and apparently crackdown was shown before they even had a developer to make the game lol also this'll be like the third year The Division is shown at E3 so thats probably a bad sign
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Apr 22, 2015 20:13
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