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Oh hey, thread. How ya doing? Ready for more BAPction? I am #bapisback
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May 2, 2015 14:55
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Hell yes I'm ready. 
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May 2, 2015 17:38
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Hockles posted:Oh hey, thread. How ya doing? Ready for more BAPction? Only if Hugo gets to leave Portland.
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May 2, 2015 19:55
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All-Star Break 2023 Update All-Stars West -- Fred Lemur (2nd Line Center) West -- Milkbags O'Leary (3rd D-Pairing) East -- Pablo Sanchez (2nd Line Right Wing) East -- Jamwad Hilder (4th Line Right Wing) East -- Aaron Athanatos (3rd D-Pairing) Notable Stats Lemur is 4th in Points; Athanatos is 8th Lemur leads the league in Goals; ThinkTank is 5th Athanatos is 5th in Assists; O'Leary is 8th Picklechips is 5th in +/- O'Bourke leads the league in PIM; Windros Jr is 2nd; Picklechips is 3rd Delacour is 4th in Wins; Orphansbane & Zip are 5th Delacour is 7th in GAA; Orphansbane is 8th Transaction News 10/28/22 -- ARZ gets: 2023 2nd Round Pick, a prospect 10/28/22 -- NJD gets: Hugo Chavez 12/21/22 -- BUF gets: Spec Samuelsson 12/21/22 -- CHI gets: Junior Webb (81 OVR) 12/1/22 -- BUF gets: 2023 2nd Round Pick (PIT), 2023 2nd Round Pick (NSH), a prospect 12/1/22 -- PIT gets: Zemgus Girgensons 12/6/22 -- LAK gets: Bobby Ryan 12/6/22 -- OTT gets: 2023 2nd Round Pick, 2 prospects 12/24/22 -- BUF gets: 2023 1st Round Pick, a prospect 12/24/22 -- CAR gets: Mark Pysyk Injury Report MIN -- The Crushinator is out with a Separated Shoulder. Expected return is 4/11/23 NJD -- R. Picklechips is out with a Hernia. Expected return is 2/7/23 TBL -- P. O'Bourke is out with a Fractured Jaw. Expected return is 1/29/23  Comments More goon movement! Everyone has now played in the NHL! http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2015 for Complete Stats
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May 3, 2015 16:20
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Hockles posted:Transaction News I take it back, I take it back. Portland is a lovely town.
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May 3, 2015 17:23
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Hockles posted:Delacour is 4th in Wins; Orphansbane & Zip are 5th Yes. YES!  (although props to Kilza for five shutouts, drat)
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May 3, 2015 17:42
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Why is Pittsburgh so bad.  Kyrosiris posted:(although props to Kilza for five shutouts, drat) Yeah, I'm surprised I have the most shutouts amongst all the goon goalies right now.
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May 3, 2015 19:57
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2023 All-Star Game Results Scoring Summary 1st Period 5:53 -- (East) S. Stamkos (J. Drouin, B. Mann-Dixon) 14:03 - (West) T. Seguin (R. Nugent-Hopkins) 2nd Period 16:12 - (West) N. MacKinnon (T. Rattie, P. Kane) 3rd Period 2:12 -- (West) T. Seguin (J. Morrissey, M. Mueller) 19:55 - (East) J. Drouin (G. Bouramman) Penalty Summary 1st Period 4:26 -- (West) O. Ekman-Larsson -- High Sticking (Minor) 2nd Period 0:57 -- (East) M. Del Zotto -- Holding (Minor) 10:14 - (West) F. Lemur -- Hooking (Minor) 3rd Period 1:14 -- (West) G. Landeskog -- Interference (Minor) 11:54 - (West) Z. Werenski -- Hooking (Minor) 3 Stars of the Game 1) (West) Tyler Seguin (2 goals, +2) 2) (West) Eric Comrie (30 saves, 2.00 GAA, .938 SV%) 3) (East) Jonathan Drouin (1 goal, 1 assist)  
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May 3, 2015 21:34
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12/21/22 -- BUF gets: Spec Samuelsson 12/21/22 -- CHI gets: Junior Webb (81 OVR) Really? Just as soon as the Hawks turn back in to a non-poo poo-team they ship me off to Buffalo. Great, super awesome.
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May 4, 2015 03:40
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First season St. Louis has not-poo poo goaltending, and it looks like Wang got bumped up a line
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May 4, 2015 03:55
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I like to think Ewic broke O'Bourke's jaw in a fight, and then concussed himself tripping in the penalty box
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May 4, 2015 21:23
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End of 2022-23 Regular Season Update Notable Stats Athanatos finished 4th in Points; Lemur is 5th Lemur finished 2nd in Goals; ThinkTank is 3rd; Satonaka is 8th Picklechips finished 2nd in +/-; ThinkTank is 6th Longrod finished 5th in Hits O'Bourke lead the league in PIM; Picklechips is 3rd; Windros Jr is 4th Delacour is 8th in Wins; Orphansbane is 5th in GAA & SV% Transaction News 3/3/23 -- PHI gets: Ewic Windros Jr 3/3/23 -- TOR gets: 2023 2nd Round Pick, a prospect 3/3/23 -- BUF gets: 2023 2nd Round Pick, a prospect 3/3/23 -- NYI gets: Frederik Andersen (84 OVR) Injury Report MIN -- C. Buttworth is out with a Torn Groin. Expected return is 5/9/23 OTT -- S. Satonaka is out with a Broken Toe. Expected return is 4/16/23  Comments Ewic Windros is home. Eichel had 72 goals. Lemur had 70. ThinkTank had 63 without an assist.  Athanatos should pick up another Norris Trophy http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2015 for Complete Stats
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May 5, 2015 07:46
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oh hey, Wang is suddenly a 30 goal scorer at 13 minutes a night, on only a 4 minute per night increase!  St. Louis is so dumb
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May 5, 2015 07:57
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Well, I played the most games out of all the goon goalies, and got the most shutouts, so...hooray? 
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May 5, 2015 08:49
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drat it only 4 short of the record for most goals in a season without surpassing 100 points. C'mon Think, keep reaching for that rainbow!
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May 5, 2015 12:18
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What the hell, our team sucks
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May 5, 2015 13:53
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Now's the year, Winnipeg. I feel it. Also, 51 points, hell yeah.
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May 5, 2015 14:42
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Whoa how did LA fall so much in one season? Bitdiddle is not even playing 70 games a year anymore 
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May 5, 2015 14:56
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I am okay with this winning attitude I'm a part of in Tampa. E: Though, this universe is a dark one as a Dallas fan...
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May 5, 2015 15:06
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Kyrosiris posted:I am okay with this winning attitude I'm a part of in Tampa. its actually cool and good, along with the wild winning the cup!!
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May 5, 2015 15:29
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Top Hats Monthly posted:its actually cool and good, along with the wild winning the cup!! All part of your thousand years of
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May 5, 2015 15:32
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Athanatos posted:What the hell, our team sucks Buffalo was near the bottom during the last update, and at some point during these last games, they won 15 games in a row.
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May 5, 2015 16:03
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Hockles posted:
WindTank Assemble!
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May 5, 2015 16:09
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Hockles posted:Buffalo was near the bottom during the last update, and at some point during these last games, they won 15 games in a row. Someone isn't pulling their weight, and it's not the 5 time all-star 
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May 5, 2015 16:11
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End of 2022-23 Season Update Playoff Results NSH def SJS in 7 VAN def EDM in 5 CHI def WPG in 5 STL def COL in 5 TBL def MTL in 6 OTT def FLA in 7 CBJ def CAR in 7 NJD def PHI in 6 VAN def NSH in 5 CHI def STL in 7 OTT def TBL in 5 NJD def CBJ in 4 CHI def VAN in 4 OTT def NJD in 7 OTT def CHI in 5 NHL Awards Stanley Cup Champions Ottawa Senators Presidents Trophy (Best Regular Season Record) Carolina Hurricanes Clarence S. Campbell Bowl (Western Conference Champion) Chicago Blackhawks Prince of Wales Trophy (Eastern Conference Champion) Ottawa Senators Art Ross Trophy (Most Points) Jack Eichel -- New Jersey Devils Hart Memorial Trophy (League MVP) Jack Eichel -- New Jersey Devils James Norris Memorial Trophy (Best Defenseman) Aaron Athanatos -- Buffalo Sabres Lady Byng Memorial Trophy (Best Sportsmanship & Gentlemanly Conduct) Jack Eichel -- New Jersey Devils Calder Memorial Trophy (Rookie of the Year) Gordon Hutchings -- Chicago Blackhawks Conn Smythe Trophy (Playoff MVP) Robin Lehner -- Ottawa Senators Vezina Trophy (Best Goaltender) Jack Flinn -- Carolina Hurricanes William M. Jennings Trophy (Goalie(s) on team with fewest Goals Against) Jack Flinn -- Carolina Hurricanes Bill Masterton Memorial Trophy (Perserverence, Sportsmanship & Dedication to hockey) Jake Bean -- Washington Capitals Frank J. Selke Trophy (Best Defensive Forward) Jack Eichel -- New Jersey Devils Ted Lindsay Award (League MVP as voted by NHLPA) Jack Eichel -- New Jersey Devils Maurice "Rocket" Richard Trophy (Most Goals) Jack Eichel -- New Jersey Devils Comments Satonaka brings a cup back to Canada Athanatos brings home another Norris trophy Goons could potentially test the free agent market now... http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2015 for Complete Stats Upcoming Free-Agents ARZ -- F. Lemur (UFA) CHI -- R. Cola (UFA) COL -- W. Van Steamsdyk (RFA) EDM -- E. Rutkowski (UFA) EDM -- R. McPhallus (UFA) EDM -- Yokozuna (RFA) LAK -- S. McStabson (UFA) MIN -- C. Buttworth (RFA) MTL -- C. Clemens (RFA) NSH -- Zip (UFA) NJD -- R. Picklechips (RFA) NJD -- H. Chavez (RFA) NYR -- A. Robertson (RFA) OTT -- F. Stats (UFA) OTT -- I. Strelkov (RFA) PHI -- ThinkTank (UFA) PHI -- E. Windros (RFA) TBL -- T. Delacour (UFA)
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May 5, 2015 18:32
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Yikes, my playoff stats were garbage. E: also holy poo poo calm down Eichel
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May 5, 2015 18:36
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gently caress you, Winnipeg. Relocate this poo poo franchise.
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May 5, 2015 19:01
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I'm home! I wove Philwy. I could stay on this ice forever ThinkTank posted:WindTank Assemble! I will be your guiding elbow on your question to score the most goals without an assist in a season!
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May 5, 2015 20:12
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THE MACHO MAN posted:I will be your guiding elbow on your question to score the most goals without an assist in a season! Think has already shattered that record, he's currently attempting to score the most goals without breaking 100 points (currently 66) a record held by his idol/substitute Dad Lanny McDonald. Although he's going UFA for that sweet sweet cash this summer. Back that truck up, he's already got his cup ring so he's available to the highest bidder. Do you need a 50 goal scoring stanley cup winner? Do you want that 50 goal scorer to be temperamental, whiny, take lazy penalties and possibly spend his evenings under an overpass? Do you hate assists and believe that teamwork is overrated (for 50 goal scorers only - everyone else should pass Think the loving puck)? Can you play down accusations of petty theft and minor battery over stolen cans of beans by a star quality 50 goal scorer in the press? Do you require your 50 goal scorers to be able to read the playbook? If you answered YES to all these questions (except the last one) then we've got a FIFTY PLUS GOAL SCORING STANLEY CUP WINNING winger for you!* *Winger may not be eligible for season start due to pending assault charges ThinkTank fucked around with this message at 21:50 on May 5, 2015 |
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May 5, 2015 21:42
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3 Norris, not even sniffed a Cup
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May 5, 2015 21:49
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May 5, 2015 23:53
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I just happened to check the google doc, and I noticed that the spreadsheets now have the color under them. I brought it up before, but it never carried over from my Excel doc. Now it does. Awesome. 
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May 6, 2015 01:04
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Please, some team get me out of Arizona.
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May 6, 2015 17:25
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Chap Buttworth's tenure in his home state was really awful and he's getting ran out of town no more tater tot hotdish and Grain Belt for ole Chap
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May 6, 2015 18:41
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1 Stanley Cup in 1 NHL season, loving owned  If the Sens just started me in the playoffs we would have won two cups
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May 6, 2015 19:43
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Flyinglemur posted:Please, some team get me out of Arizona. There is no way ARZ lets you walk. e:  from the future
Hockles fucked around with this message at 22:20 on May 6, 2015 |
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May 6, 2015 21:35
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Is it time for my "knows how to win" pay cheque?
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May 7, 2015 04:52
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Pleads posted:gently caress you, Winnipeg. Relocate this poo poo franchise. Trade me right loving now.
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May 7, 2015 07:28
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Now hang up the phone.
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May 7, 2015 07:28
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2023 Offseason News Notable Retired Players Marc-Edouard Vlasic Phil Kessel Patrice Bergeron Sidney Crosby Drew Stafford Mike Green Brent Seabrook Milan Lucic David Krecji Matt Niskanen Mark Giordano Marc Staal Kris Letang Keith Yandle Martin Hanzal Patrik Berglund Erik Johnson Jamie McGinn Michael Frolik Paul Statsny Zack Smith Artem Anisimov Steve Downie Carl Gunnarsson Michael Grabner Kyle Quincey Riley Nash Alec Martinez Jake Muzzin Danny DeKeyser Richard Panik Cory Conacher Jordan Szwarz David Schlemko Brian Flynn Ben Bishop Cory Schneider James Reimer Ben Scrivens Transaction News ARZ -- re-signed F. Lemur to a $85mil/8yr contract CHI -- re-signed R. Cola to a $10.1mil/2yr contract COL -- re-signed W. Van Steamsdyk to a $1.5mil/1yr contract EDM -- re-signed E. Rutkowski to a $6.8mil/2yr contract EDM -- re-signed R. McPhallus to a $11.4mil2yr contract EDM -- re-signed Yokozuna to a $23.5mil/3yr contract LAK -- re-signed S. McStabson to a $44.6mil/5yr contract MIN -- re-signed C. Buttworth to a $2.6mil/2yr contract MTL -- re-signed C. Clemens to a $18.5mil/3yr contract NSH -- re-signed Zip to a $19.5mil/3yr contract NJD -- re-signed R. Picklechips to a $10.1mil/1yr contract NYR -- re-signed A. Robertson to a $4.3mil/2yr contract OTT -- re-signed F. Stats to a $6.8mil/2yr contract OTT -- re-signed I. Strelkov to a $1.1mil/1yr contract PHI -- re-signed ThinkTank to a $24.9mil/4yr contract PHI -- re-signed E. Windros to a $6.4mil/2yr contract TBL -- re-signed T. Delacour to a $14.6mil/3yr contract TBL -- signed (RFA) H. Chavez to a $2.8mil/2yr contract. No compensation was given to NJD (Lowest compensation is this year's 3rd Round Pick, at $1.55mil/yr) ARZ -- signed R. Grimaldi (86 OVR) to a 4yr contract BUF -- signed N. Scherbak (87 OVR) to a 4yr contract CHI -- signed L. Schenn (85 OVR) to a 3yr contract NYR -- signed A. Ekblad (91 OVR) to a 6yr contract VAN -- signed S. Voynov (87 OVR) to a 3yr contract Top 10 Forward Salaries
Top 5 Defenseman Salaries
Top 5 Goalie Salaries
Huge Salaries in AHL CHI -- Niklas Hjalmarsson (79 OVR) -- $3.990mil CBL -- Cody Porter (83 OVR) -- $3.685mil LAK -- Jonathan Quick (80 OVR) -- $6.345mil MTL -- Carey Price (79 OVR) -- $7.620mil TOR -- Jori Lehtera (78 OVR) -- $2.5mil WSH -- Braden Holtby (82 OVR) -- $2.750mil WPG -- Alex Dubeau (86 OVR) -- $5.510mil WPG -- Bryan Little (80 OVR) -- $3.710mil 2023-24 Opening Night Info ARZ -- F. Lemur -- Starting Center BUF -- S. Samuelsson -- 2nd Line Left Wing BUF -- A. Athanatos -- Starting D-Pairing BUF -- Hockles -- Starting D-Pairing -- Alternate Captain CGY -- T. Kingston Kid -- Starting Center -- Alternate Captain CHI -- RC Cola -- 2nd D-Pairing COL -- W. Van Steamsdyk -- 3rd Line Right Wing CBJ -- R. Peters -- 2nd Line Center CBJ -- J. Longrod -- Starting D-Pairing -- Alternate Captain EDM -- E. Rutkowski -- 3rd Line Right Wing EDM -- R. McPhallus -- 2nd D-Pairing EDM -- Yokozuna -- Starting Goaltender FLA -- P. Sanchez -- Starting Right Wing -- Alternate Captain LAK -- S. McStabson -- Starting Right Wing -- Alternate Captain LAK -- B. Bitdiddle -- 2nd D-Pairing MIN -- T. Crushinator -- Starting Right Wing -- Alternate Captain MIN -- C. Buttworth -- Backup Goaltender MTL -- C. Clemens -- 2nd Line Center NSH -- L. Alger -- 3rd Line Left Wing NSH -- Zip -- Starting Goaltender NJD -- W. Clarkson -- 3rd Line Left Wing NJD -- R. Picklechips -- Starting Right Wing -- Alternate Captain NYR -- A. Robertson -- Starting Goaltender OTT -- S. Satonaka -- Starting Left Wing -- Alternate Captain OTT -- F. Stats -- 3rd Line Right Wing OTT -- I. Strelkov -- Backup Goaltender PHI -- ThinkTank -- Starting Left Wing PHI -- E. Windros Jr -- 2nd Line Left Wing PIT -- A. Kilza -- Starting Goaltender STL -- P. Wang -- 2nd Line Left Wing TBL -- B. Banton -- 2nd Line Right Wing TBL -- P. O'Bourke -- Starting D-Pairing TBL -- T. Delacour -- Starting Goaltender TBL -- H. Chavez -- Backup Goaltender TOR -- F. Orphansbane -- Starting Goaltender VAN -- J. Helar -- Starting Left Wing VAN -- M. O'Leary -- 2nd D-Pairing -- Alternate Captain WSH -- J. Hilder -- Starting Right Wing -- Alternate Captain WSH -- S. Pepperdick -- Starting Goaltender WPG -- S. Saskatanov -- Starting Right Wing WPG -- L. Gallant -- 2nd D-Pairing Line spreadsheet: http://bit.ly/1GShsJ5 Comments Everybody is still too valuable to their team to let go Except Chavez. Hockles fucked around with this message at 02:13 on May 8, 2015 |
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May 8, 2015 01:41
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