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Gothmog1065 posted:They keep advertising this whistle blower site on Hulu where you get paid. Nopiracy.org I think it was. However, you get only so much if the BSA/Software Alliance actually pursues a lawsuit and actually wins. There's a pay scale there, 15k minimum win to get paid out 5k. You could probably negotiate a settlement percentage. "I'll tell you guys who we are, and provide details on internal communications telling IT staff to 'just use the copy on the NAS', which was pirated and still has the Warez group name in the folder name. In return, you give me 20% of whatever we end up paying to settle out of court with you guys to true up our licenses. Don't like it, then I guess you'll never figure out who we are, or get the ~40k in back licensing fees we owe you". Dangle enough detail to make it a really slam dunk audit, then negotiate a percentage of the blood money. Worst case is MS declines, and you go about your day having several printed copies of your CYA paperwork.
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May 6, 2015 21:39
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Methylethylaldehyde posted:You could probably negotiate a settlement percentage.  Entrapment
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May 6, 2015 21:40
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Methylethylaldehyde posted:You could probably negotiate a settlement percentage. Just don't send it from a hotmail account.
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May 6, 2015 21:41
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m.hache posted:
It's not entrapment if they were already doing it, you're just doing your civic duty by reporting these incredibly malicious criminals to the proper non-judicial authority! Plus you're probably going to bail on them as soon as the hammer comes down anyways.
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May 6, 2015 21:42
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BaseballPCHiker posted:Didn't DickTrauma report his old idiotic boss (Tony?) and his old employer way back when? Wondered what ever came of them and his reporting them. Nothing came of it, and it was a clear case of fraud. They probably still have machines using those pirate Win2k licenses. I don't get much in the way of support email any more but I received this today and it made me smile: What do you use to clean your monitor? Also, what video card do I need to play GTA V in 4k?
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May 6, 2015 21:44
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Volmarias posted:Just don't send it from a hotmail account.
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May 6, 2015 21:44
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wa27 posted:The one benefit about working for a non-profit is that while they cut corners everywhere else, we can get licenses for most of our software for free or next to nothing, so everything we have is legit. Praise Microsoft. Our only clients that sue volume licensing are the non-profits.
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May 6, 2015 21:49
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I was working with dial up today. On a Windows 2000 Professional machine. Whee.
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May 6, 2015 21:57
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m.hache posted:Honestly it's probably just a matter of time. Yep, we got a string of emails and phone calls to every address/phone number except the ones they should have used, for a company who no longer exists whose building we now inhabit, talking about "you're being audited!!!" until I politely told them that we are not that company. I don't even know how you could confuse the two without being phenomenally bad at reading or apathetic (both?) Anyways I used the other-company-getting-audited emails as an excuse to force everyone to let me inventory the entire company so if/when we do get audited I can just dump all the information on them in about 15 minutes and be done with it.
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May 6, 2015 21:59
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wibble posted:I had calls like that 20 years ago. We'll still have calls like that in another 20 years... I hope in 20 years we have cybernetic brain implants that can let people do things with their mind only - so that when poo poo like this happens, I can club them in their stupid heads with a 2x4 and make an example of them
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May 6, 2015 22:31
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Inspector_666 posted:I usually get restore requests where nobody knows the name of the file/folder or any of the contents. These are of course business critical restores. I constantly run into people, some of whom have been using computers in a professional capacity for decades, who have no concept whatsoever of how directory trees work or where the My Documents folder is or where things are normally stored in windows or what files and folders even are at a basic level. If something doesn't show up in the Recent Documents list in MS Word then it's lost in the aether for all they know.
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May 6, 2015 22:38
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If it's not on the desktop it may as well not exist.
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May 6, 2015 23:35
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kensei posted:I was working with dial up today. On a Windows 2000 Professional machine. Whee. Hello time traveler. While I don't want to spoil too much of the future for you, you should probably buy a bunch of Apple stock.
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May 6, 2015 23:43
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Bigass Moth posted:If it's not on the desktop it may as well not exist. I learned this the hard way my first month at help desk. Installed office for a user, and they absolutely flipped out and said I didn't do my job...because I didn't put shortcuts to the various office programs on their desktop.
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May 6, 2015 23:51
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chocolateTHUNDER posted:I learned this the hard way my first month at help desk. Installed office for a user, and they absolutely flipped out and said I didn't do my job...because I didn't put shortcuts to the various office programs on their desktop. A large chunk of tickets for "Install Software" are actually "Add shortcut to X on my desktop"
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May 6, 2015 23:52
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Dr. Arbitrary posted:A large chunk of tickets for "Install Software" are actually "Add shortcut to X on my desktop"  Can you install powerpoint on my machine please? It's on the standard build
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May 7, 2015 00:17
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Dr. Arbitrary posted:A large chunk of tickets for "Install Software" are actually "Add shortcut to X on my desktop" When I install Office I "pin to start menu" and "pin to taskbar" for all of the components of whatever version of office they have. Also, new hardware deployment: 6 workstations need x86 win7 pro because of a database program that hasn't changed significantly since 1988.
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May 7, 2015 00:18
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ponzicar posted:Hello time traveler. While I don't want to spoil too much of the future for you, you should probably buy a bunch of Apple stock. If only
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May 7, 2015 00:31
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New guy's laptop has been acting up ever since he started. Looked at it several times. Finally did a couple BSoDs yesterday, dude pulled me out of a meeting to try and fix it. Decide to swap it for a replacement machine. Get it spun up, deliver about 3 yesterday. Due to the ASAP nature it was still encrypting. Cue this morning. Still encrypting (yes, dumbass had turned it off overnight) and dumbass was complaining more that its so slow (no poo poo, its still encrypting). Fuckit. swap him for a temp laptop to use while he new machine is encrypting. Fucker sends an email to the CEO complaining. That his machine never worked right despite his vocal complaints (1 ticket in 2 months relating to speed, he'd always just been emailing me direct), that we swapped it for a slower machine (told you, fucker, its still encrypting), and that he wanted to know who to talk to about getting it fixed. Cue a closed door meeting with my boss. Explain whats happening, boss is understanding and laughing at the rear end in a top hat. The machine finishes encrypting, and I return it to the rear end in a top hat. Then the dude brings over his boss and the office head boss to discuss the issue. The new machine is still slow, he told it to do a task that normally takes 10 seconds and went and had a whole conversation with his boss without it finishing. In fact, its still sitting on the screen and he wants the temp laptop back and a brand new replacement for each on his team having issues (nope). Walk over to his machine...he's got an error box up behind the window saying [app] can't find a file on the web and would he like to use a local cache'd version.
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May 7, 2015 01:06
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What happens if you tell MS to get bent when they try and audit you?
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May 7, 2015 01:10
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Moey posted:What happens if you tell MS to get bent when they try and audit you? Bend over. Here comes the lawyer barrage.
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May 7, 2015 01:20
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Moey posted:What happens if you tell MS to get bent when they try and audit you? Better to say "Sure, we run 100% *nix"
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May 7, 2015 01:27
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Moey posted:What happens if you tell MS to get bent when they try and audit you? You will lose badly
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May 7, 2015 01:31
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Ah. But what rights does one company have to investigate another company? Edit: I guess audits are done by the BSA abd not MS? Moey fucked around with this message at 01:42 on May 7, 2015 |
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May 7, 2015 01:38
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Moey posted:Ah. But what rights does one company have to investigate another company? They have whatever rights the judge gives them as part of the civil judgement.
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May 7, 2015 01:44
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Moey posted:Ah. But what rights does one company have to investigate another company? You've given them tacit approval by agreeing to the EULA. Past that, its a question of who has better lawyers. Remember, you don't own Microsoft's products. You have however purchased the right to run and operate their software if properly licensed.
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May 7, 2015 01:47
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Microsoft audits are awful. We had one last year that decided we were somehow 200 licenses in arrears in a company of ~150 and we ended up sending them a spreadsheet of every single machine we have and its key, after which they started an extended argument about how a large chunk of our machines were registered to a key that wasn't part of our licensing agreement so we needed to buy an extra license for each of those machines, and no what do you mean your OEM ships them that way that's not possible.
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May 7, 2015 03:44
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I'm half tempted to rat out my company for Microsoft licensing since our purchase requests for proper licensing keep getting ignored. I'm hoping when all of our Server 2k3 boxes hit EOL that will finally push the issue, but I wouldn't be surprised if it didn't. 
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May 7, 2015 03:51
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Boogalo posted:
Hey firefox is not on my computer so I tried to install it myself <gets report from sccm while user is claiming firefox was not installed> It was deployed with the computer. Standard image. No, it wasn't there. So, when I installed it, I got this warning don't know what it meant I just clicked OK and I have firefox now. 'Kay.It's sometimes easier to just let the user believe whatever s/he wants to believe. If someone comes after me, I have that report tucked away.
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May 7, 2015 04:26
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 Sorry about your stroke.
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May 7, 2015 10:31
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evobatman posted:
What is a private logon any way?
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May 7, 2015 12:06
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Crowley posted:What is a private logon any way? We use job-related logons for rotating shift positions (Assistant Driller is assdriller@company.com), but all employees also have their own logon for webmail and timesheets and such, so he is probably referring to that. There is of course also the VPN client, intranet portal, Citrix portal etc etc etc, all which can be a little much to keep track of for someone who has spent the last 40 years working on heavy machinery in the North Sea.
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May 7, 2015 12:14
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please do not post my email address
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May 7, 2015 12:19
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I love when people say stuff like "Always something new!" or "You guys are always changing things!". It's Sharepoint. The login procedure has been the same for two years now.
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May 7, 2015 13:41
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Neito posted:I love when people say stuff like "Always something new!" or "You guys are always changing things!". With referral to the previously mentioned assdrillers, I'm guessing that everything in the North Sea has been the same for the last 40 years, because anything new is a scary inconvenient cause for panic, swearing and complaining. Doesn't matter what it is, if it is a logon screen, new laptop with exact same OS, software and image, widescreen instead of 4:3, desk phone and on and on and on. If it's changed to new, it's inconceivable, scary and bad, and the way they have been doing things for the last 40 years is the correct one. We have also had people working here for over 20 years without ever seeing the intranet webpage or creating a helpdesk ticket. They think they are still rogue pioneer roughnecks building the country piece by piece, and not pawns in a multinational Big Oil corporation. evobatman fucked around with this message at 13:50 on May 7, 2015 |
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May 7, 2015 13:47
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Bigass Moth posted:If it's not on the desktop it may as well not exist. Constantly, this. For some reason Filezilla's shortcut routinely removes itself from the desktops of the computers in the newsroom and I have yet to figure out why it does this, but you can bet I'll start getting pissed off reporters demanding to know why I uninstalled Filezilla. This also happens with their Youtube video downloader.  Where is my youtube downloader It should be in the start menu if it's not on the desktop...............Where is my youtube downloader
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May 7, 2015 14:16
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larchesdanrew posted:Constantly, this. For some reason Filezilla's shortcut routinely removes itself from the desktops of the computers in the newsroom and I have yet to figure out why it does this, but you can bet I'll start getting pissed off reporters demanding to know why I uninstalled Filezilla. Put the shortcuts in the Desktop folder of the ALL USERS directory. You might have to login as Administrator to do this. Then they cannot delete them, at least not permanently. I do this with anything that every needs to ahve so it is always there. If it is a dynamic shortcut I use a logon script to put it on the desktop but for standard programs the above works perfect.
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May 7, 2015 14:22
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Trastion posted:Put the shortcuts in the Desktop folder of the ALL USERS directory. You might have to login as Administrator to do this. Then they cannot delete them, at least not permanently. I've done that and it seems to be deleting itself from the All Users folder? I'm just resigned to the fact that gently caress this gently caress that nothing will ever work here have some more bandaids
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May 7, 2015 14:24
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We pin Word and Excel to the Start Menu, and pin Outlook to the taskbar. If you can't figure it out after that, tough loving poo poo. I'll be sure to let your boss know that you are incapable of fulfilling the requirements of your job position.
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May 7, 2015 14:38
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Trastion posted:Put the shortcuts in the Desktop folder of the ALL USERS directory. You might have to login as Administrator to do this. Then they cannot delete them, at least not permanently. Or leverage Group Policy for configuration management and eliminate the issue completely? It is entirely possible that everyone in his environment are admins also.
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May 7, 2015 15:55
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