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GhostStalker
Mar 26, 2010

Guys, find a woman who looks at you the way GhostStalker looks at every bald, obese, single 58 year old accountant from Tulsa who managed to win $4,000 by not wagering on a Final Jeopardy triple stumper.

PoptartsNinja posted:

Well, good news. I got the position.

Congrats, PTN!

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Artificer
Apr 8, 2010

You're going to try ponies and you're. Going. To. LOVE. ME!!

PoptartsNinja posted:

Well, good news. I got the position. I don't know what my final schedule's going to look like beyond the 4PM-to-midnight shift, but that still leaves me plenty of time for updates during the day. The only downside is, It'll be more of time crunch as I'll have to do them before work rather than my current plan of getting off work loving around updating for five hours.

Expect a combat theater update tomorrow or Thursday at the latest, but at least for now I'm probably going to keep the scenarios a bit smaller and my update schedule may have to change depending on when my days off are.

Congrats dude. Any nice perks?

Dolash
Oct 23, 2008

aNYWAY,
tHAT'S REALLY ALL THERE IS,
tO REPORT ON THE SUBJECT,
oF ME GETTING HURT,


Glad to hear you got it! Hopefully your new schedule isn't too baleful, 4pm to midnight sounds pretty spooky.

lilljonas
May 6, 2007

We got crabs? We got crabs!
Yeah, congrats on the new position!

anakha
Sep 16, 2009


...so how many Trials did you have to win for the position, PTN?

hooman
Oct 11, 2007

This guy seems legit.
Fun Shoe

anakha posted:

...so how many Trials did you have to win for the position, PTN?

Lets just say catering for his Sibko reunion parties will be pretty cheap going forward.

Devorum
Jul 30, 2005

Artificer posted:

Congrats dude. Any nice perks?

I heard he got a Bloodname.

Runa
Feb 13, 2011

Congrats on the promotion, PTN!

Voyager I
Jun 29, 2012

This is how your posting feels.
🐥🐥🐥🐥🐥
Congratulations, hope it works out for you! Working night shifts can sorta shaft your personal life, but hopefully real jobs pay a bit extra to compensate for the fact that people don't generally want to work those hours.

Olothreutes
Mar 31, 2007

Congrats PTN!

Loxbourne
Apr 6, 2011

Tomorrow, doom!
But now, tea.
Well done PTN! We're patient, we can happily wait.

PoptartsNinja
May 9, 2008

He is still almost definitely not a spy


Soiled Meat
Political Update 18 – The Great Silence

Duncan Kalma set another stack of file folders on his desk and settled into his chair with a sigh. He picked the first off the stack and began leafing through the dossier within. Kelly Michaels. Unit history, kill counts, successful missions, he barely glanced at any of it, settling instead on the psychological profile provided by ComStar’s Mercenary Review Board. Calm, collected, emotionally stable. No sense of humor. Clear signs of sociopathic tendencies. Kalma sighed, tossing the dossier into his ‘no’ pile, and reached for the next.

“You could just use a noteputer,” Jason Youngblood ribbed him from his neighboring desk. Jason rattled his own machine for emphasis, “that way, any you flag as a ‘no’ will immediately be moved into my ‘no’ folder like I programmed, rather than making me have to manually sort through your ‘yes’ pile.”

“I prefer paper,” Kalma grumped. “There’s just something right about the feeling of—”

“It’s just so anachronistic,” Jason cut him off. “How much are you spending on those, anyway? I know we can afford it right now but we’re not the Kell Hounds or the Gray—the Eridani Light Horse. We don’t have the storage for you to print off the dossier for every active independent registered with the MRB. How much is it going to cost to get that whole ‘no’ pile shredded?”

“Just let me have this,” Kalma replied. “We’ll do it your way next time, but I guess I just want to spend the extra time to really get to know our candidates. Our first company has to be solid, right out the gate, if we want a good rating with the MRB. And even then it’ll take a couple of successful missions to prove we’re reliable before we get anything good.”

“All the more reason to save money while we’ve got it,” Jason replied with a friendly laugh, “but since I’m mostly just giving you poo poo, I’ll stop bugging you about this. Just keep your ‘yes’ pile organized and we’ll compare names to my list. We’re still not going to know how they’ll work together until we see them in the field.”

“I just want to eliminate the crazy ones first. You want expensive: two hours of field time is going to cost more than printing every dossier in the MRB.”

“You’re not going to eliminate the crazy ones,” Jason countered. “We’re mercenaries. We’re going to have psychological issues—we just need to focus on eliminating people who are mentally incompatible with the job—that means nobody who’s got grudges with any of the great houses. Take this one: Dechan Fraser. He was in your ‘no’ pile—”

“Yeah,” Kalma grunted. “His dossier’s full of insubordination. He’s been released from six units. Twice for failing to listen to his lance leader in combat—”

“Twice when his `Mech was the only one to come out of a Clan ambush relatively unscathed,” Jason countered. “That takes skill. And guts—”

“Or cowardice.”

“—Have you ever checked our dossiers? We’re both tagged as ‘insubordinate’ too. We’re Mercenaries, Duncan. Dechan Fraser’s a thinker, he doesn’t follow orders blindly. I’m going to make a judgment call on this: I think this guy would make a good commander for third lance and I’d like to extend him an offer.”

Jason paused at Kalma’s dubious look. “If you’re going to put your foot down here, I won’t force the issue. But dossiers and psychological profiles won’t tell us everything. We’ve either got to pony up the cash to test some of these people on the field or we’ll have to make some instinctive choices. And my instincts tell me Dechan Fraser’s someone we can use.”

“Fine,” Duncan conceded. “We’ll give Dechan a shot the next time we’ve got the field reserved. Just don’t come crying to me if he can’t cut it.”





A) Trapped
Battered and beaten, the 30th Lyran Guards are one of the few units with enough command integrity left to resist in No Man’s Land, the tiny sliver of the Lyran Commonwealth that’s been completely severed from the Commonwealth proper by Task Force Serpent’s reckless advance. They’ve gathered the broken remains of every unit trapped in No Man’s Land to stage a last-ditch defense against the advancing Widowmakers on the planet Arcturus.

B) Kalma-Youngblood Mercenary Company, LLC
The newly minted millionaire Duncan Kalma (and his new friend, Jason Youngblood) have decided to heed the Bounty Hunter’s advice to turn their fortunes into something useful: the creation of a brand-new Mercenary unit! They’ve traveled to Galatea, the Mercenary’s Star, in the hopes of recruiting at least a company before Kalma-Youngblood Mercenary Company, LLC (Name Pending) take on their first contract!

C) Behind Enemy Lines
Carlos Marik, son of the Captain-General, has been fighting a one-lance Guerilla war against the forces of House Liao for the better part of half-a-year. Exhausted and short on ammunition, he and his men have been a thorn in the Confederation’s side while they await the increasingly vain hope of rescue. It’s all but certain that Duncan Marik will find some way to rescue his son, if only Carlos can find some way to get word out that he’s even still alive.

D) The Three Front War
With the bulk of the Draconis March’s forces held in reserve or reassigned to the new border with the Duchy of New Syrtus to free up troops more capable of working with the hated Draconis Combine, Duke Sandoval’s importance to the Federated Suns has never been lower. Seeking to prove his value and loyalty, Duke Sandoval has assembled a force of mercenaries and a few loyal regiments at a staging area in the periphery for an invasion of the Outworlds Alliance—a state that has theoretically joined the Draconis Suns as a protectorate but has since closed their borders to non-essential trade.



Combat Theater Vote
A) Trapped
B) Kalma-Youngblood Mercenary Company, LLC
C) Behind Enemy Lines
D) The Three Front War

Viva Miriya
Jan 9, 2007

C

SIGSEGV
Nov 4, 2010


It's pretty hard to choose between A and C but since C has a chance of basically being a drive-by phone call, I think I have to go for it.

C.

Devorum
Jul 30, 2005

Touch choice between B and C.

I'm now intrigued by this new Merc company...but, on the other hand, killing Cappellans is hard to say no to...

C

Wafflecopper
Nov 27, 2004

I am a mouth, and I must scream

C Sounds interesting.

Z the IVth
Jan 28, 2009

The trouble with your "expendable machines"
Fun Shoe
A for more desperate last stands against the Clanners.

Btw a belated congratulations to PTN for your new post!

GhostStalker
Mar 26, 2010

Guys, find a woman who looks at you the way GhostStalker looks at every bald, obese, single 58 year old accountant from Tulsa who managed to win $4,000 by not wagering on a Final Jeopardy triple stumper.

Gonna go with A since that seems the most interesting.

LegendairyBovine
Oct 6, 2014
B Let's go Crescent Hawks.

Friar John
Aug 3, 2007

Saint Francis be my speed! how oft to-night
Have my old feet stumbled at graves!
Destroy the Capellans!

paragon1
Nov 22, 2010

FULL COMMUNISM NOW
A

I wanna see Widowmaker get dunked on.

Volmarias
Dec 31, 2002

EMAIL... THE INTERNET... SEARCH ENGINES...
D sounds like a delightful clusterfuck in the making.

PoptartsNinja
May 9, 2008

He is still almost definitely not a spy


Soiled Meat

Volmarias posted:

D sounds like a delightful clusterfuck in the making.

What fun would it be if your nobility didn't draw you into badly overextending your military and economy at every opportunity?

KnoxZone
Jan 27, 2007

If I die before I Wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.
A because a good thing needs to happen to the Lyrans at some point.

Zikan
Feb 29, 2004

C Because it reminds of Mechwarrior 3

Volmarias
Dec 31, 2002

EMAIL... THE INTERNET... SEARCH ENGINES...

PoptartsNinja posted:

What fun would it be if your nobility didn't draw you into badly overextending your military and economy at every opportunity?

Overextending your military to FIGHT YOURSELF.

quantumfoam
Dec 25, 2003

B because it's build your own mercenary company.

Holybat
Dec 22, 2006

I made this while you were asleep.
B for some merc funtimes.

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

A, because I used to play as the 32 Lyran Guards on Mechwarrior Legends, so it'll be neato to see what a PTN-world Lyran Guard unit looks like.

Kial
Jul 23, 2006
C. Sounds fun.

Trundel
Mar 13, 2005

:10bux: + :awesomelon: = :roboluv:
- a sound investment!
D, I'm curious if we can make this situation any worse than it would be if we left the whole thing to chance.

berryjon
May 30, 2011

I have an invasion to go to.
D

Paingod556
Nov 8, 2011

Not a problem, sir

Zikan posted:

C Because it reminds of Mechwarrior 3

Can't disagree. gently caress yeah, Damocles Commando

PhotoKirk
Jul 2, 2007

insert witty text here
B

Freakazoid_
Jul 5, 2013


Buglord
I'm gonna vote B because we haven't had a merc mission in a while and it's sort of like a mystery box, the mission could be anything! Even a boat!

Professor Malice
Nov 16, 2011
It was a hard choice between A and C, but I'm going to have to vote A.
Win or lose it sounds like the Lyrans are going to earn themselves a place in the Remembrance.

Dolash
Oct 23, 2008

aNYWAY,
tHAT'S REALLY ALL THERE IS,
tO REPORT ON THE SUBJECT,
oF ME GETTING HURT,


It's a toughie, but I'm intrigued by why the Outworlds would close their borders - not to mention it's a periphery state I can't recall ever hearing about, so D.

If I could vote again, though, I'd definitely want to give the Mariks the first break in their history and see if Carlos can be saved.

jng2058
Jul 17, 2010

We have the tools, we have the talent!





Jesus, Sandoval, why do you suck so much? Well, only one way to find out...



(Also, three front war suggests someone else is in there. Rim World? A sneaky Clan? Pirates? Let's find out!)

DivineCoffeeBinge
Mar 3, 2011

Spider-Man's Amazing Construction Company
I like A for the Desperate Last Stand aspect - I'm a sucker for those - but being the Marik partisan that I am, and considering I think I may be a pilot for this mission (I hope I hope I hope), I'm gonna have to vote C.



Having done so I am now terrified that I'm going to gently caress it up, but still.

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PoptartsNinja
May 9, 2008

He is still almost definitely not a spy


Soiled Meat

DivineCoffeeBinge posted:

Having done so I am now terrified that I'm going to gently caress it up, but still.

Don't be, man. All is chill in the land of Giant Fighting Robots.

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