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I'm kind of concerned about how many English majors we have in our beloved Army. Mostly because all the signs and emails look like they were written by a monkey who is learning English as a fifth language after a lobotomy.
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# ? Jul 21, 2015 01:42 |
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# ? Jun 8, 2024 09:27 |
Have you ever seen an Army PowerPoint class without an embarrassing typo?
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# ? Jul 21, 2015 02:00 |
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7 years ago I was an unemployed PoliSci graduate, 4 years ago I was an unemployed law school graduate, but then I joined the Army, went to OCS, managed my career well and took advantage of a lucky deployment opportunity and now I have a sweet job in cybersecurity working 35 hours a week and making high 5 figures in the midwest. Of course I'm still in the Reserve for a couple more years but at least the SLRP will pay all my loans off in the meantime!
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# ? Jul 21, 2015 12:37 |
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calmasahinducow posted:7 years ago I was an unemployed PoliSci graduate, 4 years ago I was an unemployed law school graduate, but then I joined the Army, went to OCS, managed my career well and took advantage of a lucky deployment opportunity and now I have a sweet job in cybersecurity working 35 hours a week and making high 5 figures in the midwest. Of course I'm still in the Reserve for a couple more years but at least the SLRP will pay all my loans off in the meantime! I take it Army JAG officer had no openings?
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# ? Jul 21, 2015 18:32 |
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calmasahinducow posted:at least the SLRP will pay Ah yes. The motto of every career officer.
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# ? Jul 21, 2015 18:34 |
Crazy Mike posted:I take it Army JAG officer had no openings? There's a shocking number of non-JAG Army officers with JDs. I was one. I assume a few failed the bar and said gently caress it, but I think most are like me and realized they'd rather make a living doing something honorable like dropping white phosphorus on children rather than something despicable like filing lawsuits.
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# ? Jul 21, 2015 19:03 |
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The Slithery D posted:There's a shocking number of non-JAG Army officers with JDs. I was one. I assume a few failed the bar and said gently caress it, but I think most are like me and realized they'd rather make a living doing something honorable like dropping white phosphorus on children rather than something despicable like filing lawsuits. Same, except anything to do with being an officer or JD.
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# ? Jul 21, 2015 19:32 |
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Since when have the Reserves gotten so desperate for bodies as to make house calls?
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# ? Jul 21, 2015 19:54 |
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Spicy Guacamole posted:Since when have the Reserves gotten so desperate for bodies as to make house calls? I've got barely a year on IRR and the reserves are still mailing me poo poo trying to get me to sign up. I've just mentally filed it away as institutional inertia. Really can't see them being desperate for people with so many having active duty contracts not renewed and the like.
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# ? Jul 21, 2015 20:37 |
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The Slithery D posted:There's a shocking number of non-JAG Army officers with JDs. I was one. I assume a few failed the bar and said gently caress it, but I think most are like me and realized they'd rather make a living doing something honorable like dropping white phosphorus on children rather than something despicable like filing lawsuits. Yup, I have no regrets about not sitting for the bar.
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# ? Jul 21, 2015 21:03 |
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SumYungGui posted:I've got barely a year on IRR and the reserves are still mailing me poo poo trying to get me to sign up. I've just mentally filed it away as institutional inertia. Really can't see them being desperate for people with so many having active duty contracts not renewed and the like.
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# ? Jul 21, 2015 21:28 |
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In 2006 I got a knock on the door after being IRR for 6 months. Major and a SFC. They got me till my IRR time was up. Those bastards.
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# ? Jul 21, 2015 22:39 |
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Spicy Guacamole posted:Since when have the Reserves gotten so desperate for bodies as to make house calls? I got about 10 calls total when i was on IRR, and like 5 or 6 mailers sent to me asking if i'd go to Fort Dix to train people during predeployment gently caress new jersey and gently caress the army
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# ? Jul 21, 2015 22:41 |
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Nostalgia4Butts posted:gently caress the army
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# ? Jul 21, 2015 23:11 |
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Spicy Guacamole posted:Since when have the Reserves gotten so desperate for bodies as to make house calls? They are pretty desperate, especially for E5+ and O3 to O5.
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 00:09 |
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Spicy Guacamole posted:It sure doesn't seem that way here. Over the past few months, I've been getting more and more letters, phone calls, and the like. Today, out of the blue, two dudes rang my doorbell and said, "Hey, want to be an officer??" The local reserve retention NCO tried to add me on Facebook and then showed up to my house. Apparently there are "lots of deployments for different units to different places" coming up. From what I hear there are some deployments to not-middle-east, but I like raking in pell grants and BAH while learning calculus too much to deploy as a not-11B doing god knows what. re: typos, back in 2010 or so there was one of those official brown federal installation signs with a typo at Ft. Benning, can't remember what for but it was peak Army at the time when I saw it. I'd imagine it would surely have been fixed by now... Justin Tyme fucked around with this message at 00:48 on Jul 22, 2015 |
# ? Jul 22, 2015 00:45 |
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if you want a free blowie from a fat slampig and are stationed at ft stewart then get in line i guess lol the dog will watch
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 02:19 |
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Mike-o posted:if you want a free blowie from a fat slampig and are stationed at ft stewart then get in line i guess lol the future cock socket of the marne posted:I don't think I'll need motivation unless I am blowing the whole squad. Then maybe I'll need motivation. And a water bottle. Perhaps a shot of whiskey between dicks. That kills the germs, you know. At least she has a sense of humor about it.
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 02:39 |
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Not trying to hear a stand up routine while I get my dick sucked.* I'll be passing through Savannah on my way to Virginia on the 1st. I could easily push my trip back a few days... *not sure this was the best way to word this
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 03:32 |
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Spicy Guacamole posted:Since when have the Reserves gotten so desperate for bodies as to make house calls? They're complaining about retention in the officer corps, but they've continually moved promotions to O3 back to 5.5 years while forcing O2s to hold company command. I don't really care either way, because my rear end is getting out, but my buddies are getting a little angry that people who have never deployed are getting promoted before them while they keep getting paid the same to do more poo poo. psydude fucked around with this message at 05:00 on Jul 22, 2015 |
# ? Jul 22, 2015 04:58 |
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and thus the cycle of army life continues to turn
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 05:09 |
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So what you all are hinting at is... I should switch from guard to reserves for a better chance at getting my gold bar?
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 06:11 |
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psydude posted:They're complaining about retention in the officer corps, but they've continually moved promotions to O3 back to 5.5 years while forcing O2s to hold company command. I don't really care either way, because my rear end is getting out, but my buddies are getting a little angry that people who have never deployed are getting promoted before them while they keep getting paid the same to do more poo poo. lol got my o3 in 36 months
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 09:33 |
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Crazy Mike posted:So what you all are hinting at is... I should switch from guard to reserves for a better chance at getting my gold bar? If that's the flavor of green weenie you like for your deep dicking sure, I guess? Probably not gonna work out in your favor, but again green weenie so what possibly could? (dont do it just serve your time and get out)
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 13:15 |
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"For the record, you're supposed to fill out X form to get your address changed in RLAS." Motherfucker, nobody at the company level does that poo poo, ever, because all you're going to do is copy it off of the form into the system and we have this amazing thing called email now that lets me send an electronic letter to you with the very information you need. Brigade is so gay. It's where senior NCOs go to die.
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 16:22 |
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psydude posted:"For the record, you're supposed to fill out X form to get your address changed in RLAS." Motherfucker, nobody at the company level does that poo poo, ever, because all you're going to do is copy it off of the form into the system and we have this amazing thing called email now that lets me send an electronic letter to you with the very information you need. My entire battalion has to physically print their certs to deploy because there's some old fart in Ft. Hood that doesn't have access to ALMS or JKO, and he's refusing/kicking back certs that have a different name than what they originally were, so it's causing a lot of perfectly valid certs to be no-go'd because the courses changed names (course number remained the same). gently caress this gay earth.
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 16:35 |
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I'll forego my usual "lol ur still in" and ask it genuinely. Why are any of you still in? We all know how gay the army is, I saw the writing on the wall in 2010 and got the gently caress out as soon as I could. I'm guessing most of you will respond with "I still have four more years to go" or something to that effect but is anyone staying in regardless if they still have a ton of time left?
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 17:16 |
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psydude posted:"For the record, you're supposed to fill out X form to get your address changed in RLAS." Motherfucker, nobody at the company level does that poo poo, ever, because all you're going to do is copy it off of the form into the system and we have this amazing thing called email now that lets me send an electronic letter to you with the very information you need. Think about this: Things like paperwork poo poo are going to continue getting worse for years because peace time Army. This has been your daily demotivational thought public service announcement. Have a nice day!
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 17:22 |
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Mike-o posted:I'll forego my usual "lol ur still in" and ask it genuinely. Why are any of you still in? We all know how gay the army is, I saw the writing on the wall in 2010 and got the gently caress out as soon as I could. I'm guessing most of you will respond with "I still have four more years to go" or something to that effect but is anyone staying in regardless if they still have a ton of time left? I was really loving broke at the end of 2011 (mom had cancer) and they offered a 10k bonus, tax free. That's really all there was to it; I'm NG so I don't have to move and adjust too much to a different unit's brand of bullshit. I have not received the 10k bonus, due to ETP.
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 17:43 |
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Mike-o posted:I'll forego my usual "lol ur still in" and ask it genuinely. Why are any of you still in? We all know how gay the army is, I saw the writing on the wall in 2010 and got the gently caress out as soon as I could. I'm guessing most of you will respond with "I still have four more years to go" or something to that effect but is anyone staying in regardless if they still have a ton of time left? 1.) The National Guard is a decent part time job/social club where I can be super hooah and leave before the constant drudgery of active army can wear me out. 2.) 10.5 more years until I qualify for a pension. 3.) I will live with constant regret over leaving without getting my gold bar. Hell, I live with constant regret enlisting with a degree and now I stay like a battered spouse.
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 18:02 |
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Army trainings gonna get a whole lot worse lololol sorry I'm directly contributing to that. On the other hand fygm I guess.
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 18:18 |
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can you expand on that? I'm morbidly curious as to how that's possible.
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 18:23 |
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Wasabi the J posted:My entire battalion has to physically print their certs to deploy because there's some old fart in Ft. Hood that doesn't have access to ALMS or JKO, and he's refusing/kicking back certs that have a different name than what they originally were, so it's causing a lot of perfectly valid certs to be no-go'd because the courses changed names (course number remained the same). The second form they sent was the BAH form, which is still retarded because any time you go on orders over 30 days you have to submit a new form anyway. Mike-o posted:I'll forego my usual "lol ur still in" and ask it genuinely. Why are any of you still in? We all know how gay the army is, I saw the writing on the wall in 2010 and got the gently caress out as soon as I could. I'm guessing most of you will respond with "I still have four more years to go" or something to that effect but is anyone staying in regardless if they still have a ton of time left? For enlisted soldiers in the guard/reserve you can stay with your unit indefinitely so long as you're willing to forego promotions until a spot opens up. So for a lot of people, it's a decent-paying part time job with benefits that they can enjoy with their buddies. On the officer side there's zero reason to stay in unless you benefit from it professionally or are in some niche like Special Operations or Cyber Warfare. Officer slots on the guard side are based upon appointment, and as a result it's so corrupt and full of nepotism that unless you're politically connected, you'll never get promoted past O4 and may never hold a company command. The Reserve side follows the same system as the regular army; however to get a battalion command you'll likely be required to travel hundreds of miles for drill (my first battalion commander lived in Florida and the HHC was in WV). I guess there's the pension, but I have absolutely no hope that the military pension system will still exist 15 years from now. psydude fucked around with this message at 18:36 on Jul 22, 2015 |
# ? Jul 22, 2015 18:33 |
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Mike-o posted:I'll forego my usual "lol ur still in" and ask it genuinely. Why are any of you still in? We all know how gay the army is, I saw the writing on the wall in 2010 and got the gently caress out as soon as I could. I'm guessing most of you will respond with "I still have four more years to go" or something to that effect but is anyone staying in regardless if they still have a ton of time left? I'm only in now to finish out my med board. Paperwork is up at the PEB currently before heading out to Seattle so the VA can perform their blood ritual of assigning disability ratings. My PEBLO is optimistic and tells me it will be two more months.
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 18:36 |
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Two months? You must not be far from Seattle. I say that because I'm pretty sure they walk your ratings from Seattle to your duty station on foot. My med board tool roughly 16 months and I was done with all ratings-related appointments by the third month. I spent over a year waiting on my ratings. It was worth the wait, but there were several times where I was legit suicidal because I felt like o was just treading water with nothing to loving do.
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 18:39 |
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not caring here posted:can you expand on that? I'm morbidly curious as to how that's possible. some of the trainings that were split deployed/garrison are going back to full garrison. big army realizes that garrison troops have lots of time. 45 minute trainings are now an hour, etc. sorry Edit: hope you like interactive trainings lololol
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 18:42 |
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Need more powerpoint classes.
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 18:47 |
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Cole posted:Two months? You must not be far from Seattle. That's my understanding. And I'm taking his guess of two months with huge grains of salt. So far I'm about three and a half months in, so my guess is I'll be out around March or so next year
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 18:57 |
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Nostalgia4Murder posted:Need more powerpoint classes. No joke, I'm going go full hooah here and say the SSD courses would be so loving good if they were actual classroom instruction and actually replaced the modules they encompass instead of having to double up on certs. I know it doesn't make someone in the Pentagon money if we cut down death by PowerPoint classes but Jesus Christ, SSD covers so loving much it wouldn't need much to become fully comprehensive.
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 19:19 |
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# ? Jun 8, 2024 09:27 |
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Pesticide20 posted:That's my understanding. And I'm taking his guess of two months with huge grains of salt. So far I'm about three and a half months in, so my guess is I'll be out around March or so next year I walked into my nurse case manager's office one morning. A NCM is the woman who set up all of my appointments while I was in the WTB. Anyway, I was beginning to go legit loving stir crazy. I felt like I was stuck in the 7th circle of hell. My life wasn't that bad when you look at it on paper. I didn't do anything all day, out of uniform by 830 every morning, civilian clothes everywhere I went. It was a decent life. But it's only decent for the first few months. After that the walls started closing in on me and I wanted to hurl myself out of my third story window on a regular basis. Anyway my point is I went into my NCM's office and has a nervous breakdown. Tears, yelling, cursing. Bless that lady's heart. I still send her emails every now and again to let her know how I'm doing because she was more supportive than anyone I ever met in the army. She sent an email to my peblo letting her know how frustrated I was getting. Twenty minutes later I got a phone call from my peblo saying that my ratings had come in. I legit fell to my knees. She claimed to have not even seen the email from my NCM, but I didn't give a poo poo at that point because I couldn't get all that wasted time back and I could finally see an end to the hell I was stuck in. What I'm saying is, don't let your peblo loving forget about you like I suspect mine did.
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# ? Jul 22, 2015 19:32 |